04x07 - Walk-A-Thon

[bunniefuu]

WOMAN: Are you ready?

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ I know you see me
standing here ♪

♪ Do I look good,
my dear? ♪

♪ Do I look good today? ♪

♪ Today, today ♪

♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪

♪ I'm just another
kind of girl ♪

♪ And you want
to see my world ♪

♪ So come and run away ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ If you wanna play ♪

♪ Come and play today ♪

♪ Let's just get away, yeah ♪

♪ I will make you see ♪

♪ All of the things ♪

♪ That you can be ♪

♪ Believe in yourself ♪

♪ Come follow me ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ ♪

- Ugh, knitting
is impossible!

- Shh, I'm trying to
set up my super sh*t.

- Which you'll
never make.

- Watch, you watch
me make it.

- Oh, I'll be watching.

- Good, and the deal is
when I make the sh*t--

- If.

- When I make the sh*t,
you promise

you'll let me
clack my clackers

in our room whenever
I want to.

And, you'll never complain
about the noise, ever.

- If you make the sh*t.

- All right then.

Now, to clarify...

First, with my stick,

I will strike the cue ball,

which will then
roll at high speed

toward this rail
right here.

- I'm so bored.

- After the cue ball
hits the rail,

it'll roll this way
past the bunny rabbit

with the hat on,
off this rail,

go up this notebook,
over the pudding, then whoosh,

right into this
corner pocket here.

- And then I'll flap my arms,

fly up through the ceiling
into outer space,

become an elephant,
then eat all the stars

like they were sparkly
little peanuts.

- Right.

[sighing]

- My yarn's all tangled!

- Hush!

[sighs]

Now, the time has come

to strike my ball.

- Just don't hurt the pudding.

- [scoffs]
Don't you worry.

Look out now,

here it comes.

- Hey.
- Whoa!

- Nice.
- Hey, cuteness.

- Thanks for noticing.

So what are these about?

- The Big Walk.

MICHAEL: I'd like to take a big
walk on your head

for wrecking my pool sh*t.

I'm leaving, okay?

[laughing]

- So, what's The Big Walk?

- A charity walk-a-thon.

- To raise money
for the homeless kids.

- Why can't the kids
just go home?

- We'll suggest that.

Wanna help us put up flyers?

- Depends.

What are we gonna do
after we put up flyers?

- Well, I was thinking,

you could come back
to my dorm room,

and help me clean the mold

out of my little refrigerator?

- I would love to
clean mold with you.

[laughing]

- Come on, Dustin, let's go.

- One sec.

You wanna sponsor me?

- I don't know
what that means.

- You pledge to give me money

for walking in the walk-a-thon.

- Will I have to walk?

- No, I walk,
you give me money,

and then the money
goes to charity.

- Okay, I'm feeling generous.

So, I'll pledge 30 bucks.

- Sweet.

Lola Martinez.



Sign here.

Cool!

So, what are you knitting?

- A sweater.
I'm almost done.

What do you think?

Huh?

Huh?

I am gonna fix you!

After I eat that pudding.

Oh, yes--

- Don't you even...

- Boo.

- I swear, you have
the prettiest eyes.

- Well, you have
the cutest nose.

- I know.

- Eskimo kiss.

[both giggling]

What?

- Uh, nothing, nothing.

- Then, why'd you stop?

Tell me.

- Come on, this is
just insane.

- Why?

Lots of guys and girls
rub noses together.

- I mean, you and me.

This.

- Oh, yeah.

- It's just wrong.

- So wrong.

This can't happen anymore.

- Let's just move on

and pretend none of this

you and me stuff
ever happened.

- I'm so on board with that.

[phone ringing]

I gotta get to class.

- Me too.

- One more Eskimo kiss?
- Okay!

[honking]

[TV] And luckily it was
nothing but sunshine

for the seventh annual
The Big Walk Walk-a-thon.

Over 150 PCA students
participated,

and had a great time.

Except for
Mark Del Figgalo.

[groaning]

Who, after walking
a quarter-mile,

collapsed from heat stroke

and had to be resuscitated.

The event raised
thousands of dollars,

which will be used to help
homeless children in America,

and that's something
we can all walk about.

I'm Jeremiah Trottman,
PCA News.

Courage.

♪ ♪

- Ugh, would you cooperate,
you stupid yarn?

- Don't work so hard.

- Oh, hey.

[turning off music]

How was the walk-a-thon?
- Awesome.

- Me and my little brother
walked 20 miles.

- Wow, impressive, kid.

- Whatever, just pay me.

- Yeah, we'll see.

- Oh, quit pretending
you can knit,

and pay the boy.

It's for charity.

- [scoffs] Fine.

I hope charity appreciates this.



- Um, wait a sec.

You pledged $30?

- Yeah, I could afford 30 bucks.

- Per mile.
- Huh?

- When you pledge an amount,
you owe that amount per mile.

- And I walked 20 miles.

- But 20 times 30 is...

- You owe me 600 bucks.

- What? I don't have 600 bucks
to give you!

- You pledged 30 bucks
per mile.

You signed it.

- Well, I didn't mean to.

- You didn't read
what you signed?

- Who reads things?

I don't have 600 bucks.

- Well, tough chunks.

- Zoey, he said
tough chunks to me.

And I don't have the money,

so what am I supposed to--

- All right,
stop whining.

I'll get Coco to drive me
to the charity office,

and I'll talk to
whoever's in charge.

- And you'll fix it?

- Yes, I'm Zoey,
are you new?

Come on, Dustin.

- Quit looking at my swimsuit.

- I'm not.

You have a bug on your stomach.

- What, where?!

Where's the bug--
get off me!

Get off me--
where's the bug?

[screaming]
Get it off, get it off!

♪ ♪

- Okay, obviously
we're not doing

a good job of stopping this.

- Yeah,

but I'm not sure
I wanna stop.

- Well, if neither of us
wants to stop this,

then, I guess...

- We're dating?

- Sorta?

- Wow.

- Yeah.

What are you thinking?

- I'm not thinking
anything.

- Yes, you are.
- Quinn--

- You're thinking something,
and I wanna know what it is.

- Let it go.

- No telling, no kissing.

Tell me!

- All right.

I'm embarrassed
to be dating you.

- Really?
- Yes.

- I can't believe you
made me say it.

- I'm thrilled you said it.
- Huh?

- I'm embarrassed
to be dating you, too.

- Seriously?

- Super embarrassed.

If anyone found out, I'd die!

- I know how you feel!

[both]
Ohh.

[Michael]
Hey, hey, is that Logan?

Boo!
- Oh!

- Hey, dude!

- Hi, Michael.

- So, what's
going on here?

- Why do you ask?
- What'd you see?

I mean, nothing.
- What do you want?

- To know if you guys
have seen my clackers.

- Excuse me?

- It's a toy he loves.

Me and James hate 'em.

- You hate when I'm happy.

- Well, we haven't
seen your clack-ems.

- Clack -ers!

Not -ems!

- We haven't seen
your clack -ers.

- Bye.

- Well.

- Do you think he
saw us embracing?

- We were only hugging.

- That's what embracing means.

See why I'm embarrassed
to date you?

- But he better not
have seen us.

Michael can not
keep a secret.

If he knows,
everybody'll know.

- He better not know.

MAN:
No.

Anthony,
Anthony.

You're not listening
to what I'm telling ya.

Now, I'll say it again.

Just take care of it.

You understand
what I'm telling ya?

Hey, hey,
no questions.

If I wanna hear questions,

I'll watch a game show.

Just do what I'm telling ya,

and don't aggravate me unless--

I'll call you later.

I don't like people in my office

when I don't know about it.

- Um, a man let me in.

- Tall fella, big eyebrows,
smells like a foot?

- Yes, sir.

- I'll deal with him later.

What do you want?

- Well, my name is Zoey Brooks.

- Should that mean something
to me?

- No, I have--

- What do you want?

- Well, I was in charge
of The Big Walk,

you know, for your
charity foundation?

You're in charge of it, right?

- I'm in charge of
a lot of things.

ZOEY: Right, well...

Okay, this is gonna
sound kinda funny.

- Is it?
ZOEY: Maybe?

Um, see, my friend Lola...

- Lola?
- Yes, sir.

She pledged $30
to my little brother,

thinking that she was
pledging a total of $30.

- Pledges are per mile.

- I know, and she knows now.

But, she didn't know
when she made her pledge.

So, all she really has is
the 30 bucks to donate.

- How many miles
did your brother walk?

- 20.

- Then your friend, Lola,

owes this
organization $600.

- Yeah, I know she does
technically, but--

- There's nothing
technical about this.

She owes us $600,
period.

- But, she doesn't
have $600--

[phone ringing]

- Yeah?

Just do whatever
it takes.

You want me to come
down there with a shovel

and do it myself?

I didn't think so,
good-bye.

People.

- Heh, yeah.

People.

Um, so back to my situation.

- The situation is,

I'll see you in 24 hours

with the $600 your friend
pledged,

or else.

- Or else?

- Max!

- Yeah, boss?

- Hi, Max.

- Show this young girl
the way out.

Miss Brooks.

Remember, 24--

[fly buzzing]

♪ ♪



or else.

- Thank you for
making that clear.

♪ ♪

- Ha, you're almost
done, sweater.

I win, ha-ha!

- [lisping]
Hey, what's up, Lola?

You want a cinnamon biscuit?

I call them
cinna-biscuits.

- Ew, no, but come here and
try on this sweater I made.

See how it fits.

- Okay, but I should warn you,

we Dillson girls tend to
be on the chesty side.

- You're fine.

Okay, right arm.

- Okay.

- Here, turn a little.

- Sure.
- Left arm.

- Certainly.
- No, twist this way.

- Oh.

Okay, um,
I'm feeling restricted.

- Where's your head?
- In here.

I can't find the head hole.

- Ooh, yeah, head hole,
I forgot about that.

- Oh, it's dark in here.

Oh, this is not
the sweater for me.

I don't like it!

Ow, I'm okay,
I'm okay.

Ah!

[yelling]

- Bring my sweater back later!

[yelling, thud]

Oh, hey,
how'd it go with--

- We're in big trouble.

- Aw, did Coco use our bathroom?

- No, I'm talking
about Carmine.

- Who's Carmine?

- The big scary man

who runs the charity
that sponsored The Big Walk.

- How can a guy who runs
a charity be scary?

- I don't know, but he is.

He m*rder*d a fly
with a desk lamp.

- What, are you sure?

- And then he said we'd
better pay him 600 bucks

in 24 hours, or else.
- Or else what?

- I don't know, maybe he's gonna
k*ll us with a desk lamp.

- Oh, my God.

♪ ♪

- I just think it's stupid.

- Okay.

- Seriously, why do they
call it a bicycle?

- They just do.

- Well, they shouldn't.

Think about it,
bicycle.

First of all,
it sounds cold,

'cause it's got "icicle" in it.

- Yeah.

What else you wanna talk about?

- It's also got "sick" in it.

Bi-sick-le.

And who rides them?

Kids.

You don't put "sick"
in something kids ride.

- I just want to
eat my sandwich.

- Fine.

I guess some people
just don't care.

- There's Michael with James.

- You sure we should do this?
- We have to.

- Maybe Michael didn't
even see us embarking.

- Embracing.

And what if he did see us?

You wanna risk people
finding out we're dating?

- No way.
- Me either.

And the more we act
like we hate each other

in front of him,
the more likely

he'll think everything's normal.

Hey James, Michael.

- Quinn.
- What's up?

- What's up, guys?

- Ugh, will you sit
somewhere else?

- Why don't you?

- What's the problem?

- He called me science nerd.

- 'Cause you are
a science nerd.

- Better than being
a vacuous Cretan.

- I've never even
used a vacuum!

That's girl work.

QUINN: You're just upset,
'cause you're not

as smart as a vacuum.

MICHAEL: [laughing]

This is fun.

What do you guys think
of the word, bicycle?

- Oh, God.

- See, you made James leave.
- Why don't you leave?

- Why should I leave?
I was here first.

- No you weren't, we got
here at the same time.

- Well, if you were
a gentleman, you would leave.

- Yeah, well, if you
were a gentleman,

you would leave!

- I can't be a gentleman,

I'm a girl, you ninny.

- Hey, I've never babysat
kids in my life!

- Hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey!

Cheese and rice,
you guys sound

like an old married couple.

- A couple?

- Why would we sound
like a couple?

We don't sound like a couple,
we hate each other.

We couldn't be
further from a couple.

- I gotta go.
- Me too.

I hate you.
- I hate you more!

Well, that didn't
work at all.

- Nope.

- You think he knows
we're dating?

- He might, which is really bad.
- Yeah.

Wanna go make out?

- Absolutely.

Open.

- [sighs]

- Thanks, enjoy your pie.

- Come get your pie!

[all shouting "pie"]

- Want a pie?
- Anyone want a pie?

- This isn't going as
well as it needs to.

- Well, how much money
have we made so far?

- Let's count it out.

♪ ♪

- [sniffing, laughing]

- I got 31.

- I got 36.

- 22.

- Awesome,

we need 600 bucks,
and we've made 89.

- Carmine's gonna k*ll
us with a lamp.

- She's kidding.
- No, I'm not.

- You wanna scare the boy?

- How are we gonna
make another $500?

- [sighs]
Well.

Let's at least sell the
rest of these pies, and--

Are we missing some pies?

- There was a big stack
of them right there.

LOLA: What could have--?

[girls]
Coco.

- All right, we're gonna have
to think of another plan,

or else we have to call
the police and tell them

about this whole "or else"
thing,

so the three of us don't...

Why do you look like that?

- Carmine.

- Carmine, what about--

Oh!

You must be Carmine.

Um, that's Dustin,

and my name is--

run!

- Quinn.
- Come on.

- This is a bad idea.

- We have to find out
if Michael knows.

- Well, he's sure gonna know
when we ask him if he knows.

- At least then, we can beg
him to keep our secret.

We can't have
anyone at PCA

finding out that--
I hate your guts!

- You witch!

- Nice.
- You too.

- Now, come on.

[clacking]

Ow, ow, ow!

I hate these things!

- Hey.
- Hi.

[clacking]

- Do you know?

- Know what?

- Do you know?

- About us, do you?

- Oh!

[laughing]

About you two!

You mean, do I know why you've
been sneaking around,

getting together,

getting real quiet
when I come around?

Why, no, I have no idea
what's going on.

[chuckling]

- It's not funny.

You can't tell anyone.

- Tell anyone what?

- That me and Quinn
are dating.

- Please, keep it
a secret.

- Dating, you two?

[laughing]

- It's not funny!

- Man, you guys cr*ck me up.

Like I'm supposed to believe
you two are dating?

[laughing]

Nice try.

I know you guys are planning a
surprise birthday party for me.

You just make sure it's
the best party ever,

and I'll pretend
I never knew a thing.

[laughing]
All right?

You two, dating?

[laughing]

Yeah, that could happen.

[laughing]

[Michael clacking]

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!

♪ ♪

[all screaming]

- $600.

- Uh...

We don't have the money.

- Wait, here.

Here's $89,
take it.

- That's all we have.

- Just leave us alone.

- This is disappointing
to me.

- Okay, fine.

If you're gonna k*ll us
with lamps,

or whatever you people use

to hurt other people,

just do it already.

I can't take this anxiety.

- Hurting people?

We're a charitable
organization.

We don't hurt people.

- You said we had to come up
with the money, or else.

- That's right.

- Or else what?

- Yeah,
or else what?

What?!

- Or else...

...you need to fill
out this form.

Just fill in
this box here,

explaining your confusion
over the pledge amount.

- Then send it back to our
main office in Memphis.

- Here's an envelope
with pre-paid postage.

- Just send it in

when you get a chance.

- Sure.

- Thank you.

- Sure thing.

My friends and I,

we're gonna go get some salads.

- Oh, hey!

That's a great sweater.

- Oh, thanks.

I knitted this.

- You knitted that yourself?

- Yeah, I've always had
a knack for knitting.

In fact, I came in second
in a New Jersey knit-off.

- Really?

♪ ♪

[men laughing]

- Now, knit three.
- Knit three.

- Yarn over.
- Yarn over.

- Knit one.
- Knit one.

- Purl two.
- Purl two.

- Knit two together.

- Okay.
- Yarn over, knit one.

LOLA: Over, knit one.

[giggling]

WOMAN: ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ I'm just another
kind of girl ♪

♪ And you want
to see my world ♪

♪ So come and run away ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ If you wanna play ♪

♪ Come and play today ♪

♪ Let's just get away, yeah ♪

♪ I will make you see ♪

♪ All of the things ♪

♪ That you can be ♪

♪ Believe in yourself ♪

♪ Come follow me ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Yeah ♪