15x01 - With a Wonder and a Wild Desire

[bunniefuu]

♪


Meredith: There is a portion of the cerebral cortex of your brain, folded deep within an area between the temporal and frontal lobes.


Wait, DeLuca...


Wha... What are you doing here?


Whatever you want, Dr. Grey.


♪ Nah, nah nah nah nah, nah nah nah, nah ♪


Ah! Ah.


It's called the insula, and it's where desire starts.


[DOOR OPENS]


- Morning.
- Ah!


- ♪ These days, you know, ♪
- Jackson.


- ♪ It's like the past ♪
- What... No.


You're with Maggie.


Yeah, but it's just a dream, so it doesn't count.


- ♪ Throw my hands in the air, ♪
- No! [GASPS]


Huh. Head in the gutter.


I like it. Tell me more.


Y... You don't get to judge me.


Babe, I'm not the one judging you.
[CHUCKLES]


[GASPS]


[BREATHING HEAVILY]


[BIRDS CHIRPING IN DISTANCE]


[DOOR OPENS]


- Mom.
- Ah!


Bailey woke up, and I gave him some milk, but he undid the cap on the sippie cup, and he spilled his milk all over Ellis.


Oh, thank God.


♪ Throw my hands in the air ♪


♪ Then I tell it like it is ♪


♪ Nah, nah nah nah nah, nah nah nah, nah ♪


If I fall asleep in the sand, will you judge me?


No. If I throw up in the sand, will you judge me?


Mm, only a little.


God, it's pretty.


Pretty bright.


Yeah.


Here.


♪


♪ I'm gonna walk away ♪


♪ Whoo-hoo ♪


♪ I'm gonna walk away ♪


♪ Whoo-hoo ♪


♪


♪ And my friends say, "Do you want to go out?" ♪


♪ I'm like, "Nah, nah nah nah nah nah ♪


♪ Nah nah nah, nah," hey! ♪


The insula is only about the size of a pea,but what it triggers in our bodiesand, by extension, in our lives,can be epic.


Oh.


Uh... Uh... Hi. [CHUCKLES]


I'm sorry.


I... I think I have the wrong house.


Are you looking for Amelia or Owen?


'Cause they're still sleeping.
The baby was up all night.


[BIRDS SQUAWKING]


I have the wrong house.


[FOOTSTEPS DEPART]


What happened? Is he up again?


No, I'm sorry. You can go back to sleep.


- It's nothing.
- [LEO CRYING]


[GROANS]


Can you make coffee?


Yeah.


[CRYING CONTINUES]


♪


Oh, whoa. Mess.


Not a dream.


Definitely not a dream.


April and Matthew and Jo and Alex all got married.


And the rest of us got painfully drunk.


[GROANS]


Why do we do that?


Huh?


Numb life's most joyous, most vulnerable, most powerful experiences with alcohol...


why do we do that?


[WHISPERING] Mm, that's too deep a question for before I've had my coffee.


All yours.


[WHISPERING] Why are we whispering?


'Cause DeLuca's asleep.


[LOUDLY] DeLuca's not asleep.


[THUD] [GROANS]


He's just staring like an idiot.


He must be as hungover as I am.


Yeah, I have to call in sick, guys.


No. Nobody's calling in sick.


It's a beautiful day.
You're gonna get dressed.


We're all gonna walk to work.


- Come on.
- [GROANS]


Let's go, guys. Come on.


God, my head hurts.


♪


Ooh. Yes. Don't mind if I do.


Uh, orange, please.


No, no, wait. Pineapple.


And extra ice.


[BLENDER WHIRS]


♪


Nice. Thank you. [CHUCKLES]


♪


Good morning.


Oh.


[CHUCKLING] Thank you, dear.


You were up and out early.


Did you make your AA meeting?


Oh, no, um, I... I wanted to... try and make a dent on these charts, so I... I'll go tonight.


Did you get any sleep at all last night?


Thanks to you...


- I slept...
- [CHUCKLES]


- ...quite...
- [LAUGHS]


...well.


And I hope to sleep quite well again tonight, too.


Uh, you get back to your charting.


Oh, I'm too distracted now. [LAUGHS]


Mwah! [LAUGHS]


Mm.


Good morning, Dr. Altman!


- Oh, and what a gorgeous morning it is.
- [DOOR CLOSES]


Dr. Bailey, I have to talk to you about the interim chief position.


I... I just... I wanted to see you and... and... and... and thank you for the offer.


Oh, you're welcome. It's exciting.


Oh! Plus, I just hired a new ortho god.


He was the personal surgeon to the Seattle Mariners.


[LAUGHS]


And... And we are putting the finishing touches on a state-of-the-art hyperbaric therapy center.


Oh, we are state-of-the-art.


We are a place you want to work.


I know. I know.


Th... This is not personal, Dr. Bailey.


Just... I thought that I was coming back to town to stay.


I... I thought that I wanted... but I... I don't.


I... I... I don't want what I thought I wanted, so I'm... I'm not coming back to town.


I can't be your interim chief.


I'm going.


Far, far away.


So, you know, just...


Good luck with your... the stress sabbatical, and...


I hope that I haven't added to it.


The... The stress.


[LUGGAGE WHEELS ROLLING, DOOR CLOSES]


Yeah, I mean, I was just saying April got married, right?


And I stood there, and I watched, and it was good.


I was good. I was truly happy for her, and that's a big deal in my life.


It's like a turning point, actually.


So, I just... I don't know... want to pay attention to that.


To what?


To whatever's next.


You know? I don't... I don't know.


It's not like I believe in a big sign or a message from above or something like that.


It's just... I don't know.


Oh, my God.


I kissed Meredith Grey last night.


Oh. Oh, my God.


I mean, I just don't get how she was able to make a decision that big that fast.


I mean, it takes me three weeks of research just to choose a toothbrush.


Yeah, well, that's April for you.


I mean, you know, she did the same thing with me.


Honestly, I don't know.


I feel like maybe that's how faith works.


Yeah, I mean, I guess that's the appeal.


You just follow your gut...


[CAR REVVING] ...and you trust that there's some hand there to catch you if you fall or... or to help you if you get it wrong.


Hey. Hey!


♪


[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS]


[TIRES SCREECHING]


[CRASHING]


♪


[CROWD MURMURING]


Whoa.


[MURMURING CONTINUES]


♪


[CROWD MURMURING]


Ma'am?


Ma'am.


[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]


- Is anybody gonna call?
- . Yeah, I got it.


Uh, what... what do you see?


Got a thready pulse. [PHONE RINGING]


Respirations are shallow.
Obviously an open femur fracture.


Probably has internal injuries, as well.


Come on, pick up.


- You saved our lives, man.
- I just grabbed your jacket.


DeLuca, my life almost ended, and you saved it.


All right? You were gonna call in sick, for God's sake.


If you'd done that, I'd be dead.


[RINGING CONTINUES]


WOMAN: Dr. Browning to the CAT lab.


Dr. Browning to the CAT lab.


[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]


[TELEPHONE RINGS IN DISTANCE]


Ah. Anything good?


What?


No.


Stop smirking at me.


I don't smirk... I smile.


And if you interpret my smile as a smirk, well, that's just because you find me mischievous, and, dare I say, charming.


I don't find you anything.


I saved your sister's brain, so at the very least, you find me talented.


[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS, DOORS OPEN]


- Let's just leave it at that.
- Ah.


- Hey. Got the elevator.
- Oh. Oh.


Oh, hey. Morning.


- Hey.
- Hey, Leo!


Don't you look cute in that hat?


[CHUCKLES]


Those two back in the saddle?


- Unclear.
- [COOING]


You think they can sense our sexual tension?


Wouldn't I sense it?


- [ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
- Oh, ouch. Delightful.


Oh, crap.


- Teddy.
- Teddy.


- Hi.
- Wait, why are you...


- What are you doing here?
- Excuse me. Oh, hi.


- Hi.
- Hey.


Bailey offered me a job, and I was considering it, but...
- We have a head of cardio.


Uh, interim chief. She... She offered me the interim chief job.


Oh. There's an interim chief job? I didn't...


Uh, she's wanting a... a stress sabbatical.


- Oh.
- Who's the blonde?


Get your breath out of my ear.


So, are you gonna take it, or...?


[LEO CRYING]


I am not.


I'm... I'm... I'm leaving, actually.


[BUTTONS CLICKING]


Nice to see you, Amelia, and, uh, whoever you are.


Oh, this is, um, this is Leo.


- [LEO COOS]
- Yeah.


Goodbye, Owen.


I'm... I'm, uh, I'm...


I'm gonna go.


Wow.


She's in Seattle, and she doesn't call?


That's... Wow.


Are you still... hung up on her?


You know what? Don't answer that.


I am gonna drop off Leo.
You have a good day.


Amelia...


[RAPID FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]


Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down.


- Incoming trauma!
- [PHONE VIBRATES]


[SIGHS LIGHTLY]


♪


[SIREN WAILS]


- First!
- First!


Uh, wrong. I was first.


- Second!
- BARRY: Easy!


PATTY: I don't want you to die out here.


Uh, what's the matter here?


Uh, he was on the floor in the bathroom screaming.


I think it might be a heart att*ck.


It's my stomach. It's just my stomach.


Uh, one of you get them checked in.


- But the trauma!
- There's a trauma.


Roy, now.


WOMAN: Dr. Pallas to Pediatrics.


[GROANS]


- That's not our trauma?
- Oh, just some stomach pain.


[GROANING CONTINUES]


Uh, you got this, Hunt?


[SIRENS WAILING]


First.


[WAILING CONTINUES]


WOMAN: Dr. Lee to the ER.
Dr. Lee to the ER.


Ow. Ohh.


Damn it, ow!


Oh.


[BREATHING HEAVILY]


♪


[WHISPERING] Uh, hey, hey. Come here.


Who's your head of cardio?


Dr. Maggie Pierce, ma'am.


Are you m*llitary?


Yes, ma'am. Air Force.


[SIREN CHIRPS]


DELUCA: MVC. Altered at the scene.


Pulse .


- BP's holding in the s.
- Okay.


There's also an open femur fracture.


- Easy.
- Got it.


She's a human bike rack.


Bike frame seems to be tamponading a pretty serious thigh bleed, so we wanted to make sure to get her into a controlled environment for the extraction.


- Yeah.
- We're gonna need ortho.


There's some new hotshot ortho guy. Let's get him.


Pierce?


MAGGIE: I got this.


She lost consciousness behind the wheel.


Oh, my God, I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!


[SIRENS WAILING, INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER]


- [KNOCKING ON DOOR]
- What?


I hear you're looking for an interim chief, and I am here to tell you your search is over.


I know what you're thinking... I'm chief of neuro, and I have my research with Koracick, and a teenage addict I'm trying to keep on the straight and narrow.


And I have Owen.


Well, I don't have Owen.


Owen has Leo, and I have Betty, and we most certainly don't have each other.


So, there are questions. And feelings.


And the two of us together is like one, big, swirling confusion tornado that could upend four lives, so, yeah.


Yeah, my life is a bit of a mess at the moment.


And this is the reason why I should pick you?


Because everyone knows that people with the most disastrous lives are brilliant at work.


Also, I am incredibly bossy by nature.


[CHUCKLES]


Okay, seriously, what does Teddy Altman have that I don't?


- Ciao.
- Hey.


Uh, you look like a... come...
a... a sea... a sea rat.


Oh, wow. Sleeping alone really brings out your friendly side.


I'm saying it must be a pretty bad hang-under.


[CHUCKLES] Hangover, and, yeah, it was.


But you know what?
I'm not feeling it anymore because I just saved Pierce and Avery from being splattered across Pine Street.


You what?


I'm a lifesaver, Carina.
I saved their lives.


It's like I was God's personal right-hand man or something.


Okay, you seem pretty proud of that.


Yeah. You're saying it like it's a bad thing.


- You paged me, Dr. Webber?
- You paged me, Dr. Webber?


You didn't say which DeLuca.


I meant Carina, but her brother may as well enjoy this, too.


I just came in with a major trauma, Dr. Webber, so...


- You'll want to see this, DeLuca. Roy?
- [BEEPING]


Male, , severe abdominal pain.


He didn't allude to why, but we think it may have something to do with this.


[BEEPING]


- Oh.
- Oh.


Are we taking bets on what this is?


- I'm going with a candle.
- My money's on a shampoo bottle.


Flashlight.


You know, that one's strangely popular.


- Mm-hmm.
- DeLuca?


Why would anybody want to do this to himself?


Because they're afraid to ask their wives to touch them inside there.


They think their wives will think they're h*m*.


This does seem that way to me.


Don't be stupid. Gay men know how to use proper sex toys that don't get lost up there.


No. No, t-this is straight-man stupidity.


The pleasure center resides just inside the a**l canal for all men, gay or straight.


All right, then.


Wait, wait, wait. I want to hear this.


The prostate is the male G-spot.


- Seriously?
- Yeah.


Why do you think we're always pulling stuff out of men's butts?


Why, indeed.


WOMAN: Dr. Graham...


Dr. Pierce, a word?


Yeah?


A private word?


[MONITOR BEEPING]


[WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY]


Okay.


Um...


Cece, I'll be right back.


I'm gonna let her finish your EKG.


You sit tight.


- Thank you.
- Okay.


WOMAN: Dr. Rainey to Peds ICU.


Dr. Rainey to Peds ICU.


- My trauma room ready yet?
- Somebody page Ortho again.


I'm gonna need a portable scan.


Did I die? Am I dead?


Nisha, you are very much alive, okay?


But I'm in Heaven.


I never believed in Heaven before, but here I am.


In Heaven.


Nisha, this isn't Heaven.


I don't think.


I guess... I guess I don't really know, actually.


You know, I mean, there are so many things we don't know.


But you are both so pretty.


Like angels in yellow.


How is she? Is she gonna be all right?


Ma'am, I'm gonna need you back in a bed.


Oh, I'm fine. I need to know how she is.


Are her parents coming?


They're far, far away.


I am so sorry, love.


My mom calls me "love."


But I've never been in love.


I didn't want to die before being in love, but I guess I had to die to find love.


In Heaven.


Child, are you kidding me?


I'm a matchmaker. That's what I do.


And not by hobby... by trade.


You just stay alive, and I will dedicate my life to finding love for you.


Excuse me, ma'am, seriously, we need you back in your bed while we review your EKG.


I've had two heart transplants.


If I drop dead right here, I would've already had a longer life than I probably should've.
So, thank you, Doctor, but I am not leaving this girl alone.


Okay, ma'am, we have an ortho team coming in, so we're gonna have to move you to make room for...


Oh, my God.


♪ Ahh ♪


♪


♪


Someone ask for an Ortho God?


♪


It is Heaven!


♪ Whoa, oh, whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh ♪


She's got a nasty open-femur fracture for sure, but I do not want to take it off the metal.


Tourniquet to control the bleeding before we take the metal bars off, right?


Bingo. How you feeling, Nisha?


Oh, God, see?


No one's ever asked me that, like really asked me.


Is that what it's like being in love, like, in love, love?


Like, where I'd wake up next to you and you'd ask me, "How did you sleep?"


[CHUCKLES] And that's... that's crazy. Who cares?


I mean, I do it every night, but you actually want to know how it went.


You want to know, "How I'm feeling, Nisha."


I do want to know that.


All right, I think she's feeling all right.


- Mm.
- I am feeling everything right now.


Pain?


Everything but that.


All right, we're gonna take this step by step.


Forks, stem, headset, cut the top tube...


I don't follow that.


Oh. You didn't work in a bike shop, bud.


Four years, Venice Beach.


Can I get a socket wrench?


Okay, I'm gonna need these carpenters out of there so I can ultrasound the belly.


No, you're right. Let's pick up the pace, guys, all right?


Okay, this could have been me, so I'd really like it if she... lived.


Slow and steady wins the race.


Bud.


All right, I'm gonna twist this, Nisha, and you're gonna feel some pressure, okay?


But if it starts to hurt, you tell me, okay?


I love you.


I love all of you.


I love all of you the most.


Okay. [EXHALES SHARPLY]


Dr. Altman?


You're Dr. Pierce?


Head of cardio?


Yeah, I'm pretty sure.


What are you... ?


No, I was when I graduated from medical school, but I was when they made me head of cardio.


[GROANS]


Are we both sharing our ages, or just me?


Damn it.


You're Grey's sister, aren't you?


- Why should that matter?
- [SIGHS]


All right.


What I'm about to tell you, it falls under the category of doctor-patient confidentiality.


Are we clear?


Uh, yeah. Yeah, I'm clear on how the job works.


Okay.


Dr. Pierce, I'm weeks pregnant.


Yesterday, I flew hours, and then participated in an eight-hour surgery, then slept for only three hours.


Now I'm % sure that I've got a blood clot in my femoral vein, so I'm afraid I could throw a pulmonary embolism.


So, I'm hoping...


I'm hoping that you can confirm my diagnosis, write me a prescription for Heparin so that I can get back on a plane and get out of here without anyone else knowing.


Can you help me?


Uh...


Check on my patient in the pit.


If her EKG is normal, hand her off to Dr. Grey.


Okay.


Hey, did you read that article on how they're introducing antigens on cancer cells to make the body att*ck them?


Uh, no, I was reading Wrestler's Week.


Mm. It got me thinking.


About?


Just about how much I liked working on mini-livers with Meredith.


It just felt new.


Boston doesn't feel new... it feels old.


It's normal to have doubts.


I have doubts.


I don't want to be freezing all the time with no friends.


But if I'm with you, I'm good.


You don't think it's a mistake to leave Seattle?


No, the only mistake is talking about work on our honeymoon.


Enjoy your sand castles 'cause they're gonna be snow castles soon.


[LAUGHS] That is not a thing.


There are snow angels and snow men.


Snow castles is not a thing.


Well, if it's not a thing, it should be.


You know, I wouldn't mind our kids growing up in Boston.


I think kids should grow up where it snows.


You got sledding.


You got snowball fights, you know?


If we have two kids, then we each get one on our own team.


If it's not a thing, it should be.


I mean, three's okay, too.
The more the merrier, right?


You know, I-I just...


I'm sorry.


[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]


[WAVES CRASHING]


All right, then.


[BIRDS SQUAWKING]


It's a major obstruction, and it's dangerous... we know that.


You're gonna need surgery for us to remove that, whatever it is.


Great. Do it. I consent.


Okay, with that said, if you had any idea what it could be, you should tell us.


It's a growth. [GROANS]


Must have grown there.


It's a growth.


So, cut me open and take out the growth.


Roy, let's prep him for E.U.A. and possible ex lap.


WOMAN: Dr. Warner, dial the operator.


Dr. Warner, dial the operator.


[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]


Hey, what you got?


I have some free time, want to have some fun.


I got an unknown foreign body in the rectum.


How unknown and how big?


Very unknown... and very big.


[LAUGHS] That sounds like fun.


I can give it to you if you make me interim chief.


Int... What?


Did Teddy post a flier?


She didn't have to.


I know everything.


Which is why I was able to teach you everything.


You know, and I could use a change of pace.


You know, something I could sink my teeth into.


And I need the office, of course.


[TELEPHONE RINGS IN DISTANCE]


- Where are you going?
- It's not fun anymore.


Wait... Wait... Wait a minute.


Hold on.


You want to slow down there, cowboy?


Bailey's an idiot if she doesn't pick me to be interim chief.


I am brilliant. I am capable.


I'm hot.


I am first-choice material.


For interim chief...?


Yes, for interim chief.


Hmm. Who was the, uh, blonde this morning?


She is the woman that my ex-husband kissed before he was my ex-husband, and I think he is still hung up on her, and Bailey offered her interim chief, which is...


- Pathetic.
- Agreed.


She has plenty of perfectly viable candidates for that job right here...
- No, no, this display is pathetic.


This alternate reality where you were some kind of a victim in your marriage.


You're a lot of things, Amelia Shepherd, but a victim is not one of the them.


An ass, yes.


Excuse me?


You were a giant ass to your husband.


You treated him terribly.


When I came to cut into your brain, I didn't realize you were even married.


- That's how little you seemed to care.
- I had a tumor.


You and I had sex the day after you separated.


It was dirty, filthy, hot sex.


I was excellent.


But it was not tumor sex.
The tumor was gone.


It was gratitude sex.


It was "thanks so much for not k*lling me" sex.


It was "thank God I'm not married to that ginger anymore" sex, and you know it.


[AIR PRESSURE ERUPTS]


[BEEPING]
- Oh.


So, you have had two transplants, Ms. Colvin?


You can call me Cece, please.


And, yes, I have had two and am probably due for my third.


Your EKG looks perfectly normal, but something did cause you to pass out at the wheel, so I would like to run more tests, if that's okay.


Dr. Parker, get a prograf and a CMP and keep Dr. Pierce updated.
- Yes, ma'am.


Uh, Dr. Parker?


I know it's a m*llitary thing, but, you know, when you call me ma'am, it really does make me feel like I'm a hundred years old.


Yes, ma'am. Uh, sorry, ma'am.
Sorry, Doctor.


Just go.


[CLEARS THROAT] Dr. Grey?


- Ah.
- Hi.


Uh, I just wanted to say I'm sorry.


I never should have kissed you like that.


I mean, you're incredible.


- It's fine.
- I-It's not fine.


I respect so much as a surgeon, and I just... I would nev...


I would never do that to you under normal circumstances.


But you were just very, very kind to me, and I was drunk, and the dress was, I mean... [CHUCKLES]


Anyway, it never should've happened, and it never will happen again.


I'm gonna go now.


Well, that's a shame.


You like him?


I'm his teacher.


You don't want to kiss him again?


- He's my student.
- Well, all right.


But you want somebody to kiss you.


I can tell.


It's my superpower.


You can talk to me... I'm safe.


I'm like the opposite of a priest.


People confess things to me, but I don't make them feel bad.


Well, I don't need anyone...


It's not about need, honey.


It's about desire.


And you are not a hundred years old.


You are beautiful and vibrant.


Oh, excuse me.


Dr. Bailey, do you have a moment?


Mm. What do you have, Grey?


I have a desire... to be interim chief.


- Oh, for the love of...
- Specifically right now.


I need it. I really... I need it.


I'm having dreams.


Inappropriate.


To a degree that I'm having difficulty putting into words.


I could use the extra work.


You do have a clot, but your D-dimer's negative.


I want to admit you and monitor you for a few days.


- [SIGHS]
- [DOOR OPENS]


- Dr. Pierce?
- Yes.


This is so not me.


I don't cry.


The hormones are in control now.


And I don't get pregnant by accident.


I'm careful!


But a man I loved came to Germany,


[VOICE BREAKING]
and it was so hard to resist, and I wasn't careful.


Oh, my God. Owen went to Germany.


Who's Owen?


♪

What exactly is your relationship to Owen?


He's kind of living with my sister.


Your sister?


Amelia Shepherd.


[SIGHS]


♪


[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]


I'm sorry I talked about kids on our honeymoon.


It was stupid. It was just... you were talking about the future and snow stuff, and it just popped into my head.


Like, I could see our kids playing in the snow, having fun, which is...


You know, kids, snow. It makes sense.


Alex, shut up, please.


I-I have an idea, a big idea, and I love you, and I will love all of our children, or at least one child eventually.


But for now, just...


Shh!


I had an idea.


What idea?


On the house.


[CONVERSATIONS CONTINUE]


The desire for a prostate massage is absolutely normal, and if you have a simple conversation with your wife


- and explain to her your desire...
- Please stop.


All she needs is a manicure and a little bit of...


Ugh, can you please make her stop?


Not until you tell me what you put in there.


My wife's...


Ow!


...hair stuff.


Shampoo! Yes!


- Thank you, Dr. DeLuca.
- Any time.


I think I'm in love with your sister.


[GROANS]


So, wait.


If Meredith is your half-sister...


Who you just met...


...and Amelia is Meredith's sister-in-law...


...from her dead husband...


...then you aren't actually really sisters.


Yeah, I know, but it's...


it's more like metaphorical sisters.


Like, we're all sisters.


There's a sister house. It's a thing.


But you aren't really sisters.


Does that matter?


Well, yeah, kind of.


I mean, blood, water.


Oh, I don't believe in that stuff.


But you do believe in HIPAA.


I'm not going to tell her.


[SIGHS]


I heard nothing, Major Altman.


Thank you, Lieutenant. Dismissed.


Okay.


You're leaving against medical advice.


I've got my compression socks, and I will elevate my leg somewhere else.


You can't travel.
You certainly can't fly.


I'm clear on that.


Dr. Altman? Teddy?


Can I call you Teddy now that I'm carrying your life-altering secret?


No.


[LUGGAGE WHEELS ROLLING]


[SIGHS] Dr. Pierce...


Thank you for the consult.


[LUGGAGE WHEELS ROLLING]


She is right, honey... that's not your sister.


So, my broken-down heart is costing me my kidneys now?


It's not your heart.


It's the anti-rejection meds you take for your heart.


They had a toxic effect on your kidneys.


So I need a kidney transplant.


We've already called UNOS, but until they can find you one, you're gonna need peritoneal dialysis every night for hours.


I'll do a small surgery and insert a catheter to make that possible, okay?


Can you put me in a recovery room beside Nisha, the girl I hurt?


I-I want to be with her till her parents arrive.


Well, I can certainly check.


Then I consent to the surgery.


Now let's talk about you.


You've been single for how long now?


[CHUCKLING] Cece.


I am happy just as I am.


Well, of course you are.


How could you not be... a beautiful, accomplished doctor like yourself?


But is there a cap on happiness?


And who couldn't use a little more?


And who couldn't enjoy sharing it a little?


I could help you if you'd let me, Dr. Grey.


I'm the UNOS of love.


So, you just moved to Seattle?


- No, I've been here a while.
- Oh.


He was the team doc for the Mariners.


- Do you get tickets, or...?
- Lot of tickets.


- Owen Hunt. Head of trauma.
- I'm Jackson Avery.


- Love the Mariners.
- I don't know if we were properly introduced ever.


Hey, afternoon, gentlemen.

I heard you have a trauma.


Need an extra set of hands?


Sure. Scrub in.


[SIGHS]


And how's your first day going, Dr. Lincoln?


Going great.


Be going even better if you called me Link.


Oh. [LAUGHS] Okay, I'll try.


Mm.


You know, you may have forgotten that I was once chief.


Everybody seems to just, you know, forget that.


I wouldn't touch that job with a -foot pole.


That job comes with stress.


Bones break under stress.


So do souls.


Simple... that's the key to life.


[EXHALES SHARPLY]


Wha...


RICHARD: Since we couldn't get it out with the E.U.A., we need to open the sigmoid to access it from above.


All right, we are going to make an opening in the sigmoid colon.


Okay, scalpel.


[SIGHS]


Okay, right there. Yeah.


All right, let's pull it back just a little bit. Yeah.


- Mm-hmm.
- That's good.


[LIQUID SUCTIONING]

♪


Okay. I have this.


Hold on.


[SUCTIONING CONTINUES]


Something feels hard.


[METAL SCRAPES]


There's a small bleeder here.


Stop. Wait, okay? I got it.


Let me get a clamp.


[SIZZLING]


Roy, back away!


- Aaah!
- Watch out!


- [MONITOR BEEPING RAPIDLY]
- Get down! Look out!


[BEEPING CONTINUES]


WOMAN: Get more lap pads! He's crashing!


I need some water over here!


♪


Let's get some laps here.


What the hell happened?


It was aerosol hair spray... not shampoo... and it exploded. Is he all right?


Yeah.


Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm okay.


Thanks, man. You saved my life.


[BEEPING CONTINUES]


More laps. Hurry.


[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]


Got this bleeding under control.


Get me two units of blood.


I need two vascular clamps.


More laps here. Okay.


I need to divert with a colostomy.


Okay, more suction in here.


[LIQUID SUCTIONING]


Talk to me, Roy.


He... He exploded.


Not until after I told you to back away and you didn't.


Get him out of here.


DeLuca, you were very brave, but I need you to scrub back in and help me try and stop this bleeding.


Yes, sir.


- More suction.
- [LIQUID SUCTIONING]


Let's try some, Bokie.


[ALARM BEEPING]


Son a bitch.


Okay, well, that's just great.


That's great. All right, all right.


[SIGHS]


All right, let's... let's talk about it.


You were awful to him... we've established that.


So, if you really want him back now, you're actually gonna have to fight for him.


Knock the other player out of the game.


Your advice is that I should fight another woman for a man?


What thing that's worth having has anyone ever gotten without a fight?


You didn't become a neurosurgeon without fighting for it.


You didn't come back from a brain tumor without fighting for it... you fought like hell.


And if some woman had been standing between you and your ability to get out of bed, you would've fought her, Shepherd.


There might have been Jell-O.


Or mud.


Maybe costumes.


I am not gonna take personal life advice from you, Tom, because, in that area, I have no respect for you.


Very smart. I have my flaws.


But I only have one regret in this life, and that is that I watched my wife walk out the door of our marriage and into the bed of a man who wasn't me without fighting for her.


It's not anti-feminist to fight for what you want.


It's anti-Amelia not to.


Will you clean up this melted brain?


It's grossing me out.


[DOOR CLOSES]


[MACHINERY WHIRRING]


LINK: Check it out, Nico.


Got to go through the interior of the femur.


NICO: Cool. Can I do it?


Nah, I'm having too much fun.


- You're on tunes. Any requests?
- Your call.


[MONITOR BEEPING]


[NVDES' "OU LA LA LA (ALL
EYES ON US)" PLAYS LOUDLY]


There we go. Now I can focus.


♪ We got all eyes, We got all eyes ♪


A little loud, isn't it?
I can't hear myself think.


That's the point.


Surgery's in the hands.


Do it enough times, it's muscle memory.


Start getting in your head... that's when bad decisions get made.


- Hey, turn it down.
- ♪ We got all eyes ♪


♪ We got all eyes, we got all eyes on us ♪


[SOFTER] ♪ We bus ♪


JACKSON: All this girl wanted was love.


She gets hit by a van driven by a matchmaker.


I mean, come on... it's got to mean something, yeah?


If this girl had to get wrapped around a bike to find her soul mate, I give up.


Yeah, no, just, sometimes something happens so something else can happen.


No, I don't...
I don't know how to explain it.


God works in mysterious ways?


Everything happens for a reason?


When one door closes, another one opens?


Okay, never mind.


I... must have hit my head or something.


[CHUCKLES]


[MACHINERY WHIRRING]


♪


♪ We got all eyes, we got all eyes ♪


♪ We got all eyes on us ♪


♪ We bus ♪


[METAL CLANGS LOUDLY]


- Sorry. Sorry.
- ♪ We got all eyes ♪


♪ We got all eyes,we got all eyes on us ♪


I feel like I'm drowning in testosterone. Is that a thing?


Okay, Cece, this is going to be quick and easy.


You should be out for less than minutes.


Any questions?


Just give me broad strokes of what you're looking for in a man


so I can think about it while I sleep.


I'm not really looking.


I'm not against it.


I'm open to the idea of something coming along, but I'm not out there looking for it.


Okay, I respect that.


And I'd like to be taken off the UNOS kidney list.


What?


I don't feel like we need to get out here and look for a kidney, do we?


Let's just wait and hope one comes squishing through the door on its own.


[MONITOR BEEPING]


Would you put her under, please?


[AIR RUSHING]


♪


- All right, let's bring in the paddles.
- Okay.


- Hurry.
- Come on.


[ALARMS BLARING]


- Charge to .
- Come on.


[PADDLES WHINE]


Paddles.


- Clear.
- [THUMP]


Charge again, .


- [PADDLES WHINE]
- Come on, Barry. Fight for it.


Clear.


[THUMP]


Come on, come on, come on.


[FLATLINE]


[PADDLES WHINE]


[THUMP]


[FLATLINE]


I'm calling it.


- No! Let me try again.
- DeLuca.


Just one more time, Dr. Webber, please, okay?


I'm kind of on a roll today.


Charge to .


[PADDLES WHINE]


The man is dead.
He's lost too much blood.


[MACHINE BEEPS]


[CLICK, MACHINES TURN OFF]


Time of death... : .


[MACHINE BEEPS]


[PADDLES CLATTER]


[SIGHS]


DeLuca, I need your help explaining this to his wife.


Of course.


[FLEURIE'S "OUT OF THE BLUE" PLAYS]


[SIGHS]


♪


♪


[DOOR SLIDES OPEN]


[MACHINE BEEPS]


♪ Notes on your car ♪


How's it going?


- ♪ Notes in the air ♪
- Good. You?


Good. Took a walk on the beach.


- ♪ Forget where we parked ♪
- I got a massage on the boardwalk.


I even took a ride on that, uh, roller coaster. It was great.


- ♪ Forget not to stare ♪
- I want to design cancer-k*ller cells by introducing su1c1de genes in the cancer cell DNA.


- ♪ Out of the fall ♪
- Like guided m*ssile immune therapy.


- ♪ Out of the blue ♪
- And I swear to God, I think I can do it.


I know... I know that
I am ruining our honeymoon.


- ♪ I never belonged to one like you ♪
- Do you hate me?


Jo, you married me.


In the whole history of my life, nothing has surprised me more than getting you to marry me.


- [CHUCKLING]
- So, no, I don't hate you.


I just want you to eat something so you don't die.


[LAUGHS]


[SIGHS]


However many kids we have, they're gonna be really smart.


- [CHUCKLES]
- ♪ Everything in life ♪


- ♪ Is like a dance with strangers ♪
- Look at this.


♪ Right from the start, your heart is waitin' ♪


♪ You'll never find love without a little danger ♪


♪ We stumble around to the music playin' ♪


♪ How do you know it's true? ♪


[SIGHS]


It could have been me in that bed.


Me and Maggie.


- ♪ The harder we fall ♪
- Hey. How are they?


Oh, they're both fine for now.


- ♪ Harder we bruise ♪
- Great. Great.


DeLuca, man, thanks.


- ♪ I never belonged ♪
- You know, again.


- ♪ To one like you ♪
- Yeah. It was a crazy day.


Crazy couple days. [CHUCKLES]


You're feeling better, Dr. DeLuca?


I am, Dr. Grey. Thank you.


♪ Everything in life ♪


♪ Is like a dance with strangers ♪


♪ Right from the start ♪


- ♪ Your heart is waitin' ♪
- If you ever cheat on my sister, I'll k*ll you.


- ♪ You'll never find love ♪
- I don't care who it's with.


♪ Without a little danger ♪


O-Okay.


- ♪ Stumble around to the music playing ♪
- Sorry.


- Oh! I'm sorry. You all right there?
- Yeah, I'm fine.


- ♪ How do you know it's true? ♪
- I don't think we've met. I'm, uh...


No.


♪ How do you know it's true?


Hey.


How well do you know HIPAA?


Like, specifically, like, if... if one were to accidentally, in conversation with a family member, let slip a detail of... of a patient's life that was actually not related to their medical condition?


What do you think that would result in... a loss of license, or...


Or maybe just a fine?


We almost got hit by a freaking car this morning.


- I know. [CHUCKLES]
- [CORK POPS]


Then I got hit by another kind of car.


♪


- Hey, are... Hey, are you okay?
- [GLASS THUMPS]


You don't seem entirely okay.


You know this morning, you said that faith is like just trusting that there's some giant hand out there that'll catch you, and then literally a hand pulled us out of the path of death?


- ♪ Stood at the cold face
- It was DeLuca's hand.


- ♪ Stood with our backs to the sun ♪
- I prayed, and April woke up.


Or April woke up because I'm a really excellent doctor.


[GLASS THUMPS LIGHTLY]


- Look, I'm not trying to be dismissive.
- [SIGHS]


- ♪ I can remember
- And I'm not trying to claim any credit...


[CHUCKLES]
- What's funny?


- What's funny?
- Mm.


You sound like me.


You sound like me. I don't sound like me.


- ♪ We've become echoes
- It's embarrassing.


- Jackson...
- I'm embarrassed.


[SIGHS] It's okay to change.


Yeah, I mean, actually, you should.


You're alive.


- ♪ We've fallen to the dark
- It's okay to evolve.


♪ As we dive under the waves It's okay to... search for a deeper meaning.


♪ I heard you say


- ♪ The devil's on your shoulder
- I believe in something.


- ♪ The strangers in your head
- No idea what, but it's pulsing through me.


- ♪ As if you don't remember
- You know, I...


I want to take that leap.


- ♪ As if you can forget
- I do... I want to trust my gut and... and... and feel like something's gonna catch me...


- ♪ It's only been a moment
- ...if I screw it up.


- ♪ It's only been a lifetime
- I want to do what


April and Matthew did, you know?


- ♪ But tonight, you're a stranger ♪
- I want to... I want to trust it.


April and Matthew got married.


- ♪ Some silhouette
- Yeah. And I'm saying


I want to trust it.


We're...


We're, um...


We're out of milk.


We'd like to imagine that we're in control.


♪ Let's go out in flames ♪


- [DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
- But more often than not...


- ♪ So no one knows who we are ♪
- ...the chemicals in our brains


control us.


[SIGHS]


Leo's asleep, and Betty's...


- ♪ We've become echoes ♪
- I have feelings.


- ♪ But echoes are fading away ♪
- I know. I know, and I am so sorry.


No, Owen, uh, don't apologize.


I'm saying...


- ♪ So let's dance like two shadows ♪
- I have feelings... for you.


- ♪ Burning out a glory day ♪
- I have feelings for you.


[CHUCKLES]


Like, um, pulse-racing, chest-pounding feelings, and I know that there is a lot of water under this particular bridge.


And I would understand if you told me no, if you said, "Amelia, I can't go there again."


I would understand.


And, um, if you are in love with Teddy and she's in love with you...


...I'm not gonna fight her.


♪


But if I never told you th...
[EXHALES SHARPLY]


But if I never told you that I have feelings and you just went chasing after Teddy because I wasn't clear...


♪ Just hold me ♪


...I wouldn't be able to forgive myself for that.


♪ Just hold me ♪


[SIGHS]


- ♪ Just hold me ♪
- Teddy accused me


of not being able to be alone.


Today?


- ♪ Just hold me ♪
- No, no. When I was in Germany.


- Oh.
- Yeah.


♪


I don't want her to be right.


♪


♪ Devil's on your shoulder ♪


♪ Silhouette ♪


♪ Strangers in your head ♪


♪ Silhouette ♪


♪ If you don't remember ♪


♪ Silhouette ♪


♪ If you can forget ♪


♪ Silhouette ♪


♪ But tonight, you're a stranger ♪


- ♪ Some silhouette ♪
- The insula lights up,and we are compelled to change our lives.


Compelled by longing.


Compelled by yearning.


♪ Ah-ah ♪


♪ Silhouette ♪


♪ Ah-ah-ah ♪


♪ Silhouette ♪


♪ Ah-ah ♪


- ♪ Silhouette ♪
- [KEYS CLACKING]


- ♪ Just hold me ♪
- ♪ Silhouette ♪


♪ Silhouette ♪


Compelled by desire for more.


- ♪ Just hold me ♪
- ♪ Silhouette ♪


- [SIGHS]
- ♪ Ah-ah, silhouette ♪


♪ Ah-ah ♪