Woman: it's an honor
to announce
This year's
blossom queen winner,
The most important crown
that any girl can ever wear:
Dylan schoenfield!
( Music playing )
( Camera shutter clicks )
( Cheers and applause )
Principal guthrie:
dylan.
Dylan?
Dylan!
Yes, principal guthrie?
The blossom queen
campaign application.
I need your signature.
( Class bell rings )
Oh. Thanks.
( Snaps fingers )
( Clears throat )
next?
This year's going to be
très fantastique. Know why?
Girls: why?
Because once I'm
crowned blossom queen,
I will be the most popular
girl at woodlands academy ever.
( Girls titter )
Drama club.
Easy vote. They like
my dramatic flair.
Ooh! The very shirt
I introduced last semester.
Followers. Easy votes.
Film club nerds.
You're like
a movie star to them.
Totally.
Indie rock wannabes.
What's with the guitars,
people?
This isn't a campfire!
Can you believe you
actually used to be
Friends with amy loubalu?
Alas, it's true--
Until I traded up
to you two.
Dylan!
I took your suggestion
And got my hair
cut into a bob.
Definitely cuted up.
See? People know I care.
Easy vote.
But what about
nicole paterson?
She's major competition.
( Low feline growl )
Lola and hannah
see me as their leader,
And a leader should
never show weakness.
That would be très mauvais.
That's french for "ew."
"What" and "ever."
A good candidate
likes the competish.
If I ran for blossom queen
unopposed and won,
Boring.
And who has the number one
seat on the ramp?
Moi.
Dude.
Hey.
Oh, look.
Asher's holding it for me.
Ohh! So sweet.
Ohh!
Ohh! You-- you geek!
This is designer!
No, it's tuna noodle
casserole.
You are so guh-ross!
"Gross" is
just one syllable.
I can't believe
the popular people like me
Are forced to share
the same air
As nerderers like you!
What?!
Forced to share
the same air as me?
Okay, you wear
so much perfume,
You need a gas mask
just to survive!
Watch.
Is this yesterday's
fettuccini alfredo...
Recycled?
No paparazzi!
( Camera beeps )
Ohh!
So sweet.
Ohh!
Ohh!
Ohh! You-- you geek!
This is designer!
No, it's tuna noodle
casserole.
You are so guh-ross!
"Gross" is
just one syllable.
Ohh!
( Snickers )
that's classic.
Look what you did
to my friends!
But I didn't--!
I can't believe
the popular people like me
Ar forced to
share the same air
as nerderers like you!
I prefer the term
"film geek."
They must practice that.
Casablanca.
Curtiz is the director.
It also stars
ingrid bergman,
Peter lorre,
and claude rains.
As bogart's best film?
I fully disagree.
The african queen,
with katherine hepburn,
Directed by john huston.
I mean, it's miraculous.
I mean, it's
unbelievable. Hi!
Oh, look.
The film club president
finally decided to show up.
Sorry, guys, I got
stuck in traffic
on the diva freeway.
Wow. Where's your lunch?
Dylan schoenfield's
wearing it.
My food went where
no mere mortal has
ever gone before--
The ramp.
You need a passport
to go in there.
Passport?
You need a robot army,
With level-
dragon slayer skills.
Okay, guys, seriously,
It's a whole other
alien world,
A mystery species.
We'll never fully
understand the populars
And the way their
strange vortex works.
( Sparks and shrieks )
Okay, what are you
inventing now?
( Blows ) artificial
intelligence chess.
Hey, amy.
Choir: ♪ aaahhh
That's a cool guitar case.
Never gonna happen, friend.
Thanks for
the support, pal.
Calculate this, josh.
You've been crushing on
amy loubalu
Since third grade.
We're juniors.
That's approximately
, school days,
Minus summer breaks,
that you could have asked
her out, and haven't.
I'd go out with you.
Guys, I don't have
time for dating.
Okay, the puget sound
film festival is only
six weeks away.
And he's our
school's best sh*t
at total domination
In the city's
student film scene.
You'd better win.
No, I gotta win.
Okay, first prize
is a summer
At a hollywood film camp,
In los angeles.
All right,
I want to make this
Groundbreaking
documentary
That truly
changes the bar--
You know, a film
that establishes me
As the next
cinematic genius.
So, what's
the documentary about?
No idea.
You have no idea?
So...
Wanna go out with me?
( Sparks and shrieks )
No.
( Knock on door )
( Scottish accent )
come in.
Mr. F.?
Oh. Josh.
I brought my application.
Favorite student.
Great, great. Like this.
I can't wait to see
what my star student
Has come up with, huh?
It's a documentary
about the evolution of...
Robot voices in
the science fiction genre?
Yeah. You know
how no two robots
Ever sound the same
in any sci-fi movie?
You know, you have your
"i. Am. A. Robot."
But then you have these
futuristic, like...
( Imitates beeping )
josh.
Your artistic vision
is robot voices?
Yeah. Mr. F.,
I'm struggling here.
I've got all these
great ideas, but...
None of 'em are good enough.
You really would like
to win that trip
To hollywood film camp,
huh?
More than anything.
Then challenge
yourself, josh.
Choose a documentary
subject matter
Where you stretch
your limits.
Explore new territory.
Discover the truth.
How 'bout
instead of robots...
A human subject?
A human?
Okay.
So, challenging.
Truthful.
But human.
Got it.
Right. Now, I will
need a real proposal
by tomorrow.
Otherwise, I will have
to give our school's slot
To another student.
Okay.
No, I am not taking a dollar
less than the listing price.
Well, that's great.
I can have the paperwork
sent right over.
Great. Talk to you soon.
Well, sweetie,
what do you think--
Do we turn this place
into a sparkles cupcakes
Or accessories barn?
Dad, anyone who buys
their accessories
in a barn
Is totes tragique.
I vote for cupcakes.
Gives it more of
a glam factor.
And that is why you're
my top advisor.
( Cell phone rings )
uh, you know what?
I am gonna have to
head back to the office
for a late meeting.
Whatevs. Ooh, I need to
borrow your marketing team.
Marketing team? Why?
Blossom queen!
It's essential!
I need signs, brochures,
headshots...!
Oh, well...
Absolutely not.
But nicole paterson
has the whole varsity
and j.v. Football team
Making posters
for her campaign.
Yes, and you have
ingenuity.
If you want to win,
you need to do this
on your own.
You're a smart girl.
( Cell phone rings )
Gotta pull yourself
up by your bootstraps.
( Cell phone rings )
Yes, this is alan.
Bootstraps?
What does that even mean?
Um, hel-lo!
Boots have zippers!
I should know.
I tried on pairs
at shoes unlimited last week,
And none of the pairs
I bought had straps.
Bad reception?
Yeah, uh, well...
Dude, seriously,
This is not refundable.
Tell you what.
Here's % off
on your next phone.
Thanks.
Choir: ♪ aaahhh
It's imported leather.
Imported from where?
Somewhere foreign with
lots of shipping costs. Duh!
Yeah. Probably italy. Duh!
( Bee buzzing )
a bee?
A bee?
Oh, my gosh, a bee!
A bee! A bee!
( Shrieking )
Oh! Oh, no!
Oh, my gosh!
Stop! Oh, my gosh!
Oh, my...!
Aaahhh!
Ohh! Oh, no!
Oh, my gosh!
My purse!
Help! Somebody help!
( Bell dings )
( William tell overture
playing )
Someone turn
the fountain off!
Chop-chop!
( William tell overture
continuing )
Help!
Help me! My purse!
Aaahhh!
It's a serge sanchez!
Will somebody help me?
Someone turn
the fountain off!
Mr. Farley said that my
movie subject should be human.
Dylan schoenfield's human.
Sort of.
She's definitely a challenge.
A big challenge.
Someone turn off
the fountain now!
Why aren't they
listening to me?
Give me your phone.
Who are you calling?
- - .
( Gasps )
it's that geek
from lunch today!
He's saving your purse!
What?!
Wait. Wait, wait,
wait, wait. Wait.
Really?
( Happy shrieks )
Ugh!
Ew!
What?!
Go woodlands!
Vote paterson!
Imported leather
needs specialty cleaning.
When my cell phone
got wet, i--
My serge sanchez!
You named your purse?
Not so fast!
I have a proposal for you.
Whatever it is,
the answer is n-o.
Spells "no way."
Can I at least propose
the proposal first?
I want you to
star in my movie
for the film festival.
Oh... What?
Star?
Uh, what's it, uh...
What's it about?
You. Your life.
You know, what it's
like to be popular
And run for
blossom queen.
( Bell dings )
Nicole paterson might
have buttons and posters,
But what's that
compared to a movie--
Especially if it's
about me?
Deal.
Once you lose this.
Deal.
The competition
just got serious.
It's always been
serious for me.
( Snaps fingers )
zach!
( Clears throat daintily )
Tomorrow. Lunch.
The dining hall.
We can start filming
my movie then.
Actually,
it's my movie.
Where are my shoes?
You need some
major cpr, serge.
Marta?
I need help carrying.
Marta?
"Dylan,
went to dentist.
Dinner's in the fridge.
Love, marta."
You'll be as good
as new, serge.
Male vocalist:
♪ as of late
♪ Can't go outside
♪ Can't get in my car
♪ And go for a ride
♪ All I can do is try
♪ To smile
♪ As my thoughts
pass by you ♪
( Computer chimes )
"Amy posted
a picture of dylan..."
What?
Why'd she do that?
♪ Nothing is the way
♪ It's supposed to be
My mom took that photo
When amy and I won
the second grade science fair,
Back when we were besties.
Mom d*ed later
that same year.
Sometimes I like to
look through her old stuff.
Makes me feel like
I'm still with her.
( Door squeaks )
( Door squeaks )
( Door squeaks )
Josh, is that you?
No, mom, it's a burglar
Who just happens to have
keys to the front door.
Hey, mouse!
Who'd you bark at
today, buddy?
Who'd you bark at today?
Who'd you bark at today?
Oh, yes, you're
a good boy!
Let's go! Come on!
Come on! Come on!
Come on! Come on!
( Sighs )
( Speaking japanese )
Same to you... I think.
Hey, guess what!
I found my new
documentary subject.
Dylan schoenfield.
Oh, that is wonderful, hon.
Yeah.
Who is he?
She, mom.
One of the most popular
girls at school.
I was gonna follow
her around and sh**t
Her blossom queen
campaign.
I'm thinking a hard-hitting
exposé on popularity.
Huh. Well, that sounds
like an ambitious project.
Yeah. Speaking
of projects--
Mom, what is that?
Sushi-making class.
I am making
a spicy dragon roll.
Great.
( Chuckles )
there we go.
( Water boiling )
( Indistinct shouting )
Hey, mom, you just
want to phone in
for pizza instead?
Oh, yes.
So much better.
No. No, no, no, no!
Go get him!
Hey, paul, it's sandy.
Oh, I like this, huh?
An exposé on popularity.
Yep. You told me
to challenge myself,
And, uh, dylan schoenfield's
proving to be a big challenge.
Don't forget
what else I said:
Seek out the truth,
huh?
Right.
The best documentarians
leave their preconceived
notions at the door.
Uh... Totally, mr. F.
Yeah.
Dylan schoenfield, huh?
Popularity could turn out
to be more complicated
than you think.
Welcome to
the competition, josh.
Next stop hollywood, huh?
Yeah.
Little bit of that action!
Hey, you ready to start?
Almost. Hold this.
First, some ground rules.
One, we need to set
a strict filming
schedule.
No hanging around me
before or after.
Sure, like I'd want to.
Two, I need
a beauty budget,
So $ a week
should suffice.
Beauty budget?
I only get $ a day
for lunch.
Three, no filming
from my left side,
ever.
It's my bad side, see?
They're exactly the sa--
Are you always this
high-maintenance?
It is not high maintenance
to want to look nice.
Voilà. Now I'm done.
Hey...
Don't you want this?
Oh, you can just
set it down at my seat.
The ramp?
Duh. Where else
would we eat lunch?
( Gasps )
( Gasps )
Dylan?
sh**t' a movie.
Excuse me.
One small step
for geeks...
One giant leap
for geek-kind!
Not now.
Josh: why so determined
to be blossom queen?
Because it's the best way
to ensure lifelong popularity.
Aren't you
already popular?
Let me ask you this:
does sunshine lemonade
advertise?
Yeah, they have
the commercials with
the waterskiing penguins.
Oh, I like the penguins!
Sunshine is
already number one.
They don't
need to advertise,
But they do it to stay
number one. Get it?
Got it.
Good.
Everyone thinks it's so easy
being the popular girl.
It's so not easy.
Girls, this is
moi's movie.
Actually, if they want
to add something,
that's fine.
But being popular
is so not easy.
It's like royalty
or being the first lady:
You have to live up to
impossible standards of beauty
And you're expected
to be a good influence.
Like, I help out
the less fortunate.
Oh, you have a charity?
Absolument.
Fashion victims.
Un moment.
Hannah, the yellow scarf
you're wearing is
washing you out.
Here. Wear mine instead.
See? I just sacrificed
my own outfit for hers.
But it was worth it.
Ohh!
Josh!
Ohh!
Hey.
If you're a ,
you can only date a ,
Like asher.
Coming to watch me
play volleyball?
Mm-hmm.
Dylan, he's blocking
your light.
Why is there
a talking nerd here?
Asher, we've done
all of this.
Josh is making a movie
about me winning
blossom queen.
Play nice.
Doesn't mess with my
volleyball "schedge"?
Never. We'll work
around it.
Got it. Thank you.
So this is what you
do after school?
Shopping improves
the economy.
How... Thoughtful.
I know, right? I care.
Right.
So, in a scientific sense,
how does popularity work?
Are the other blossom
queen candidates...?
There are levels
of popularity,
Anywhere from student
council president
popular
To only popular
with your parents.
Sure nicole's
cheerleader popular,
But is she blossom
queen popular?
Doubtful!
So, how does one move
up this social scale
of popularity?
Well, one way is hoping
it'll rub off on you.
Popularity is contagious.
What, like a cold?
Duh!
It's why hannah
and lola battle to be
my better friend.
Their popularity
comes from mine.
Six-point-five percent
sales tax on ...?
$ . !
Hate it, have it,
have it, have it,
have it, hate it.
I'll try some on
just for fun.
How many shoes
do you need?
One pair for each day
of the year. Why?
How many do you own?
You're lookin' at 'em.
Clearly.
Totes tragique.
So, how long's
this gonna take?
No filming in here!
Hey, here's your chance
to tell me something
about dylan.
Oh! Like what?
Like, does your popularity
really come from hers?
We may not be
as popular as dylan,
But we do
know some stuff.
Like, when dylan
doesn't get her way,
She goes full-on
d.q.m.!
Drama queen mode.
And asher only dates dylan
because she worships him.
And asher loves
being worshiped.
♪ Tuh-dah!
So...
What do we think?
Très adorable!
Oui oui!
You guys! French
is m trademark! Duh!
So populars
only hang with populars?
Cats don't hang
with dogs, right?
Really?
That's your argument?
It's better this way.
If everyone stays
with their own group,
There's no chance
for misunderstandings.
Like... What kind
of misunderstandings?
Take you and me,
for instance.
If we mingled outside of
doing my movie together,
You might get the wrong idea
and ask me out.
Imagine the horror.
You'd be so
embarrassed.
( Clears throat )
Did we get it?
Yep.
We got it.
Ow!
What are your plans
after school?
Uh, pilates,
but not on tuesdays.
That's yoga.
After you graduate.
Hopes. Dreams.
What's your life goal?
Blossom queen.
After that.
After? If I don't
win blossom queen,
My life is officially
o-v-e-r over!
Oh, you missed a spot.
I have no words.
Nothing.
Josh...
( Huffs )
Snack break?
It's satay.
It's from my thai
cooking class.
Uh...
It's not--
it's not good?
How's the big movie
coming?
Josh! Josh!
Get my shoes!
My feet are cold!
Well, she's...
Well, I don't--
Diva?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I want to make this
true documentary
About high school
popularity,
But, mom, this is a joke.
Well, I mean,
sometimes people
behave a certain way
Because they have
something else going on.
What's the real dylan like?
Real, mom?
Okay, the only real thing
about dylan schoenfield
Is that
she's really annoying.
You have to give her
the benefit of the doubt.
Mom.
You have to be
an archeologist.
Dig deeper.
( Spectators cheering )
( Spectators groan )
This is going to look
fantastic.
I can't believe we were
invited to a beach party
with the populars.
It's strictly work,
okay?
( Laughs )
nice bonnet.
The sun is evil.
Well, I for one
plan to have fun.
Hey.
Oh, finally.
I see you brought
your "non-tourage."
This is ari,
my second a.d.
He's in charge of
all the "b" roll.
Whatever all that means.
Okay. Well, you know,
I'm-- I'm going to take
some additional... sh*ts.
Sorry we were late.
Had to get directions.
Directions?
You've never been
to the beach?
Everybody likes the beach.
Not me.
Shocker: not everyone's
into the same things
you are.
I find that
hard to believe.
Come on!
Okay.
( Spectators cheer )
Come on, eagles,
let's go!
Next time, baby.
It's okay.
We're still
two points behind.
Go, guys! Come on!
Water, babe?
Yeah.
Excuse me.
Hi.
Despite our
northern latitude,
The sun still emits
dangerous u.v. Rays.
It's like sitting in
a fryer at burger world,
Without the side
of onion rings.
Spf ?
Ohh.
Oh, yeah!
Come here.
( Laughing )
( Thud )
( Spectators cheering )
Hey, amy.
Nice, uh, stick-thing.
Thanks.
It's called
a gator-grabber.
"Gator"?
Like alligator.
Whoa.
That's weird.
Saving the environment.
Goin' green!
Hey. Doin' okay.
Amy and I had our
first real conversation.
Should be called
the croc catcher,
'Cause crocodiles
actually do eat garbage.
Oh.
Yeah.
Josh!
Josh! Josh!
Josh, enough with
the unscheduled breaks.
It's time to get
back to work.
Hi to you too, dylan.
How are you these days?
I'd be better if
strangers didn't tag me
in ancient pics online.
Come on, josh!
Strangers? As I recall,
we used to be friends.
Josh, come on, let's go!
Chop-chop! Time is money!
'Bye, amy.
'Bye, josh.
Oh! I so saved you
back there.
You should have been
focused on filming me
instead of flirting.
Flirting?
I wasn't-- I wa--
no, no, no, no.
I don't flirt!
Oh, clearly.
It was totes tragique.
It's more obvious
that you like amy loubalu
Than nicole paterson's
hair extensions.
Yeah.
I mean, no.
Wait.
You two used to be friends?
( Sighs )
I know. Hard to believe.
Back in elementary school.
You are getting
my good side, right?
We're over here.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm gettin' it.
So what happened?
Look at her and look at me.
Life happened:
i.e., I'm popular.
Amy's popular.
We've gone over this, josh.
She's "I'm in
a girl band" popular,
Not blossom queen popular.
( Spectators reacting )
Oh, no! The volleyball
game's over! Asher!
Dylan: asher!
Hey, where you guys goin'?
The movies. It's dark.
And no one steals
our snacks.
Victory means...
Pizza land!
Two large meat volcanoes,
triple cheese!
You ready, dyl?
Well, marta made me
a pizza last night,
So I called ahead
and got us all reservations
To the new sushi
place downtown!
Raw fish?
Ralph!
( Laughter )
Have fun with that.
I'm outtie with my boys!
Yeah!
( Teammates agreeing )
I don't
like fish either.
I could eat pizza
every day.
Wait! Wait, wait!
No, no, no, no!
Call - - !
Call - - !
Someone's
stealing my car!
What are you doing?
Stop! What is this?
Six unpaid parking tickets.
Oops. Seven.
When? You mean those
little flyer thingies
on my windshield?
They ain't
greeting cards, lady.
Oh, no.
Please.
Please.
Ohhh!
( Camera beeps )
( Sighs ) you surely
have a car, right?
Yeah.
This is yours?
And it runs?
On real gas?
So she's a little old.
Old? This thing
is, like, prehistoric.
You know,
somewhere a caveman
is missing his car.
Hello!
( Huffs )
Thank you.
( Starter motor whirrs )
Why are you hiding?
It's called shame.
Well, they're gone now.
( Sighs )
( Starter motor whirrs )
( radio chatter )
Okay, turning on the radio
isn't gonna help our
battery situation.
News. Guh-ross.
What? The news bores you?
Ever heard
of pop music?
We're young.
Live a little.
( Pop music playing )
( Starter motor
whirrs and grinds )
Uh-oh.
What-oh?
( Hissing )
What's that?
Josh, that never
happens to my car.
What is that?
That's smoke.
How are you gonna fix it?
( Coughs )
We're gonna need
to find a gas station.
"We"?
Fine. Stay here.
There is no way I am
risking being seen
Hanging out
in this thing!
( Door squeaks )
Josh!
Ugh! Stupid phone!
Who are you so busy
texting?
The girls,
telling them that this is
The w-o-r-s-t
worst day of my life.
Yeah? Ditto.
Ow! Ohh!
My ankle!
I think it's broken!
Probably just twisted it.
Well, I can't walk.
It could swell up!
You know, this is
all your fault.
If you didn't have
a junker car,
This never would
have happened.
Sorry we don't
all have nice bmws,
Which you'd
be driving right now
If you weren't such a...
Diva.
What did you call me?
Nothing.
You said something.
I heard.
Fine.
Diva!
I called you a diva!
Precious cargo here,
buddy,
And don't ever call me
that word again!
What, diva?
D-i-v-a.
What's that spell?
Oh, that's right! Diva!
Diva? I'm a movie star.
You said so yourself!
No. What you are
is a selfish whiner.
I'm talented!
Take that back, or I'll...!
Or what?
I'll fire you
from my movie!
It's my movie!
I'm the director!
If anyone's fired,
it's you, you diva!
Ew! You're fired!
No, you're fired!
Wait! Where are you going?
I always get the last word.
Nope, not today!
What? How am I
gonna get home?
Uh, there's this thing
called the bus.
Enjoy the ride.
Bus?
I got rid of
the drama queen.
I'm sure it's not too late
To change
documentary subjects...
Right?
I'm afraid it's too late
for you to change
Your documentary subject.
You'll never get
a new film done in time.
Yeah.
You're not a quitter,
josh. What happened?
It's dylan schoenfield,
right?
She's too much
of a challenge.
Sometimes the truth
isn't easy.
Uh, it's a shame to think
Woodlands won't even
have an official entry
In the film festival
this year.
Now, will it?
Okay, you can do this.
Knock 'em dead.
Thanks.
Thank you.
Thank you, everybody,
And hello, fellow woodlanders.
Dylan schoenfield here,
Like you don't know!
Anyway, vote for me
for blossom queen
Because this school
deserves to be ruled by...
Something sweet!
Whoo! Who wants candy?
Everybody loves
chocolate, right?
It's sweet!
And it's pink!
Ha ha ha!
Everyone gets their turn.
( Huffs )
Hi, everyone,
it's me, nicole paterson,
Your next blossom queen!
( Spectators applaud )
Ready? Okay.
"N" stands for "nice."
"I" stands for "integrity."
"C" stands for "cool."
"O" stands for "original."
"L" stands for "loyal,"
And "e" stands for
"extremely delicious cupcakes"!
Go, woodlands!
( Spectators cheer )
Vote paterson!
Ha ha ha!
( Shrieks )
cupcakes for everyone!
( Giggles )
come get your cupcakes!
Oh, no, she did not.
Oh, I guess
she did.
Can we get
a cupcake too?
Nicole:
vote for paterson!
Vote for paterson!
Dylan!
Ian greene complimented
my new haircut,
And then he asked me
to spring formal.
Awesome, right?
Oh, olivia,
that's great.
So I can count
on your vote?
Uh...
( Mumbling )
"What" and "ever,"
dyl.
Cupcakes are lame.
You have a movie
being made about you.
Yeah. You're
gonna be a star.
Yeah. Like nicole paterson
can compete with that.
The soldiers
of ancient greece
Fought in a phalanx,
Latin for "finger."
A phalanx is a rectangular
Mass m*llitary formation,
Usually composed
entirely of...
Heavy infantry.
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
we get it.
The spartan hoplites,
Combined with the narrow space
at thermopylae,
Made for a seriously
not-glamorous battle.
But I've got
my own battles!
I'll never win blossom queen
without my movie!
The persuasive qualities
of the phalanx
Were its relative simplicity
and low cost,
As well as being a source
of political influence.
As well, sometimes
when the phalanxes
Were pushed at top speed,
they would ram,
Thus we learn the term
"greased lightning."
( Weak chuckle )
( Indistinct happy chatter )
Bela lugosi,
frank langella,
Gary oldman,
christopher... Walken!
Christopher walken
already played
the headless horseman
In sleepy hollow.
He would never be dracula.
( As christopher walken )
christopher walken!
I'm gonna suck your blood.
I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna bite you
in the neck. It's gonna hurt.
Just don't s*ab me
in the heart. It's rude.
Blah! Blah blah!
Steven--!
I'm with him.
Can I cut through
the line with you?
What are you doing here?
I'm here to see, uh...
Flight of the navigator.
Duh!
You're into sci-fi?
Who doesn't like science?
And fiction, together?
Wow, it's like...
Skinny jeans
and ballet flaps.
Speaking of...
I'm liking the new look.
Oh, move up.
Those macaroon cookies
are awesome.
Oh, yeah, yeah, I know.
( Indistinct happy chatter )
Um... What's
dylan doing here?
I'm supposed to be
the only girl.
The film society has
an open policy, right?
Right.
It's in our bylaws.
You know, we don't want
to be exclusionary,
Like the... Populars.
So, what are we
talkin' about?
Not you! I mean--
The movie.
What else?
I question the notion
that the protagonist
didn't age.
There is no plot
if he did grow older.
It's called a movie.
Well, they didn't
explain that in
the exposition, did they?
And where's your
suspension of disbelief?
( Mumbling )
Anything to add, dylan?
It's called
time dilation, people.
As einstein theorized
in the twin paradox,
The passage of time
is linked to the speed
of the observer,
Meaning that traveling to
and from the planet phaelon
Times the speed
of light would virtually
suspend aging. Duh!
So, I've discovered
that there is such
a thing as a bus.
I've been taking it
everywhere lately.
It's green.
Okay, so,
my dad grounded
the "dyl-ish mobile"
Until I can pay off
my parking tickets.
It's all good.
I'm parked down here.
So, what's with
the secret smarts?
Exactly. They're secret.
Now, let's keep it that way.
Yeah. Heaven forbid
anyone thought you
had a brain
In that pretty little
head of yours.
Only nerds get "a's."
You think I'm pretty?
Sure. Doesn't everyone?
Absolument.
Okay, so, look:
I was thinking
I could nicely un-fire
you from my movie.
Really?
You mean
I could nicely
Rehire you
for my movie.
Word on the street
is that you had to drop
out of the film festival
Because you don't
have a film anymore.
I'm guessing
you want to win that
Just as bad as I want
to win blossom queen.
Fair enough.
But under one condition:
No more-- no more diva.
What? I was never a diva.
Bus stop is that way.
Fine.
Deal.
Part two.
Deal.
Part two.
So, is your car gonna
start this time, or...?
The fun is in the mystery.
Come on.
Mm-kay.
( Josh sighs )
Ah, home sweet...
Wow.
It's big.
Real inviting, right?
Is your dad at work?
Yeah.
Where's your mom?
Uh, she passed away.
I was .
I... Had no...
I'm sorry.
It's okay.
So, you want to come in,
hang for a bit?
Sure.
Okay, so, what does
your dad do?
He owns a bunch of
real estate around town,
So he's either always
working or hanging
with his girlfriend.
Yeah. My dad lives
in san diego.
Guess we both
only have one parent.
Come on, I want
to show you something.
What I'm about
to share with you
Is a highly
top-secret recipe:
The everything-but-
the-kitchen-sink sundae.
Yeah, I've never heard
of that before.
Duh! What do you think
"top secret" means?
And that secret
Is you find every
sugary, gooey substance
You could possibly
find in the kitchen
And mix it all together.
What are we waiting for?
Welcome to the everything-
but-the-kitchen-sink sundae!
You wanna get your
ice cream in there.
You want a variety
of ice cream.
Do you think that's
enough ice cream?
Gummi bears!
I love gummi bears.
You like gummi bears?
Sprinkles!
Ooh!
Worms!
Gross!
Ooohhh!
Gummi bears
and chocolate chips
together-- mwah!
What you gon' do?
What you gon' do about it?
♪ What you gon' do
about that? ♪
Ohhhh!
Dyl-ish!
So, what's the - -
on your amy crush?
Although I don't know
why you're crushing
on her.
Where's the peanut butter?
You know, I didn't even
think that nerds dated.
Geeks. Okay, and we
are people too, dylan.
Since we're talking
about personal - - s,
What's with you and asher?
What about us?
Well, he's
kind of an idiot.
Gee, I don't remember
asking you your opinion.
Hey, you started it,
Talking about me
and my love life.
Exactly. "Love life"
implies that you're dating,
Which you are not.
( Gasps ) I know what
my movie needs: a makeover.
No. Please, no more
shopping footage.
Not for me, for you.
Here. I can get some
"before" footage
of my work.
I'm not one of your
fashion victim charities,
Okay, dyl?
I like the way I am.
You would.
More whipped cream?
Snoop much?
Is this your mom?
( Sighs )
yeah.
She met my dad
at the woodlands
spring formal.
Crazy, huh?
Wait. Was your mom
blossom queen?
Back in the olden days.
.
Wow.
Bet you miss her.
Lots.
This house gets
kind of lonely with
just me and my dad.
So when you said
there was nothing
more to life
Than winning
blossom queen...
( Sighs )
yeah.
Guess my mom...
If I win, it's like
we're still connected...
Like she's still with me.
You know what?
I'll do it.
I'll do the makeover.
Really?
Yeah.
( Giggles )
let's start with this.
Oh, yay!
I'm so excited!
♪ I'll be the one
that's storming the castle ♪
♪ We'll be the two
with hearts b*ating faster ♪
♪ 'Ever you want,
'ever you want ♪
♪ I'm down
♪ I'll be the one
that makes you adore me ♪
♪ We'll be the two
♪ To end the story
♪ One that I want,
one that I want ♪
♪ I found
♪ Baby,
it's your kiss ♪
♪ Hey, princess
♪ Hey, princess
Ooh, oui! Ooh-la-la!
Feet higher.
Chin up.
Make sure your elbows
move with the rope.
That's pretty good.
Okay, let's go,
let's go, come on!
I'm not used to sweating!
Yeah, it shows,
but girls like
a sporty guy!
I don't think
jump-roping is my thing.
Ohh!
Up.
Up!
Ooh! Serge sanchez'
new cologne, manpower.
Manpower?
Aum.
Aum.
♪ Hey, princess
( Camera beeps )
Turn him around.
I want to see the front.
Ohh! Fantastique!
Hey, turn it off.
I'm the only
documentarian here.
Now show him!
Ridiculous.
Wait, is that a compliment?
Josh, upload on
the lingo already.
Thank you.
It looks fantastic.
Mm-hmm.
Now, go see
the finished look.
Oh, w-wait.
See? It's not so
high-maintenance
to want to look nice.
And now, for
the finishing touch.
What?
A second pair of shoes,
since I ruined the first.
Really?
Awesome.
Thank you, dylan.
We'll tell my dad
it's beauty budget
for the movie.
( Cell phone rings )
My mom.
She wants me to pick up
naan bread on my way home.
I love indian food.
I have to go to dinner
with my dad and his
stupid girlfriend.
Thanks.
Well, you can
come over if you want.
Oh, no, you don't have to.
I know, but...
You're welcome to.
Okay.
What's the holdup?
Thank you.
After you.
Oh, thank you.
So, this is it,
home sweet home.
Hey, you get to meet
mouse today.
Who's mouse?
Hey, buddy!
Ohh! Ohh! Ohh!
Ohh! Ohh!
( Laughter )
Oh!
Oh, josh, new hair--
oh, my gosh, a girl!
Hi!
Hi!
The first josh
has brought home.
I need to get my camera.
No, you don't.
I bring girls home.
Tons.
Oh, wait, you're--?
Dylan schoenfield.
Hi!
Hi.
( Bell dings )
oh, my samosas.
Hey, mom, I'm gonna
go give dylan the tour.
Okay.
Nice to meet you.
You too.
Okay!
Mom!
( Muttering )
( Laughter )
Delish!
This is the best
indian food ever.
Really?
Mm-hmm.
Thank you.
Way to play my mom, dyl.
No, not at all.
These samosas are
très bon, mrs. Rosen.
Oh, please, it's sandy.
I stopped being
mrs. Rosen two years ago.
So, are you two
dating now?
Uh, no! I didn't say--
I'll help.
Uh, josh, will you
take out the garbage?
Yeah.
Josh and I are
just friends, sandy.
Oh. Oh, I just thought
maybe 'cause he brought
you here to meet me,
I thought maybe
something else
was goin' on.
No, I already
have a boyfriend,
And josh likes
someone else, so...
I don't know.
Don't get me wrong,
though. Josh is
totes awesome.
Well, I think so too.
Mouse!
Chow time!
( Thud )
josh: unh...!
Were you spying on us?
What? No!
Girl talk? Gross!
Give me the towel.
I'll dry.
Ohh!
What do you think
about that?
Was that guh-ross?
( Playful shouting )
( Playful shrieking )
( Indistinct
playful shouting )
( Laughter and shrieking )
Of course boring old
walking would turn out
to be your thing.
What? It's green
to walk to school.
You sure this isn't
too much?
C'est magnifique.
Means "good."
Okay.
Oh, w-w-w-w-wait!
Oh. Perfection.
Now go.
Okay.
( School bell rings )
( Indistinct chatter )
Hey, josh.
Hey.
New clothes?
Yeah. I, uh,
did my laundry.
Done laundry's
a good look for you.
Josh, right?
Diggin' the vibe.
Josh.
See you in a.p. English.
What?
So...
It's kind of nice,
having girls talk to me
For something other than
help on their homework.
Yeah.
Wonton wednesdays.
The mathlete scavenger
hunt is on saturday.
Outstanding.
I'm in. Josh?
Um... Josh.
Nice haircut.
That's it. Josh,
you've been more m.i.a.
Than the final digit
of pi.
Then you show up
with a fakeover.
What's going on?
Relax, guys.
It's just a new haircut
and some new shoes.
Dylan thought it
would be fun for
the documentary.
When did
the documentary
get fun?
Isn't it supposed to be
a heart-hitting exposé
on the populars?
It will be.
It just dylan turned out
To be more interesting
than I thought.
Losing focus, my friend.
First amy loubalu,
and now dylan.
What do you mean?
Girls you have
crushes on...
Who are never,
ever gonna date you.
Okay, I don't have
a crush on dylan!
Please!
"What" and "ever"!
Josh! What are
you doing? Come on!
We're on for saturday.
Mm-kay? It's gonna be
ridiculous.
Lates.
"Ridiculous."
"Lates."
It's like invasion
of the body snatchers.
Directed by
phillip kaufman.
It looks like josh,
But it acts like it's
morphed into a popular.
( Giggling )
Wow, josh, you're, like--
A-dork-able!
My handiwork, naturellement.
Um, amy's sitting
over there,
And if you're so
determined to ask her out,
You'd better do it now.
I'll save you a seat.
Yeah?
Okay.
Go!
Here.
So this...
Is what you did
all weekend without us?
Josh's makeover?
No, we were filming too,
but... What-evs.
You can make him over
all you want...
...but he's still
count dorkula.
We're just saying.
You better watch it or...
Or what?
Just or.
( Sighs )
okay, look,
Josh is strictly
a bro-friend.
I figured if he's
gonna hang around us,
Then he might as well
look the part.
Thanks.
When's this stupid
dork-umentary over, anyway?
You missed my game.
I had to get my own water!
Spring formal
is two weeks away,
And once
I'm blossom queen,
Everything will go back
to the way it was.
Swears.
( Indistinct happy chatter )
( Soft laughter )
My band, blue tangerine,
is playing a free show.
Bring a friend?
Actually, I was
going to ask you.
Ask me to go to my own show?
No.
I was gonna ask you
on a date.
Really?
How's saturday?
It's my day off.
Sounds great.
Great.
Cool.
( Soft laughter )
Josh rosen.
I'm alan schoenfield.
I just wanted
to meet the young man
My daughter's been spending
all of her time with.
Oh, and, uh...
I've never really
approved of that asher kid.
I mean, asher?
What kind of
a name is asher?
Actually, sir, dylan
and asher are still--
I like that you have
a job, in my mall--
What time do you
get off work?
Considering it is
your mall, sir...
Whenever you say.
Do you have dinner plans?
No, sir.
You do now.
Ho-kay.
Thanks for the ride.
No prob!
That outfit...
Is gonna look so cute.
I'm so totally jealous.
Oh, thanks.
Au revoir!
'Bye!
What--?
I can't believe I've
never seen this before.
No? It's a classic.
Now, what's with
the rings of fire?
They were created by using
two circular neon tubes,
And they were moved
up and down using
elevator mechanics.
Fritz lang
was most interested
In exploring the intersection
between magic and technology.
Should I be taking notes?
Yes. ( Chuckles )
It's like I entered
an alternate universe.
Oh, no, wait. Worse.
An alternative
alternate universe.
Hey, there, pumpkin.
Since you missed dinner with
amber and me the other night,
I figured it was time to meet
this new boyfriend of yours.
Oh, and we got you
a turkey cheddar.
Dad!
What? It's your favorite.
Josh is not my boyfriend.
D'accord?
I tried to tell him
that, dyl.
What is it with parents?
We're just friends.
He's making my movie.
My movie.
And actually, sir,
your daughter helped me
Land a date
for this saturday.
Oh, really?
Josh: yeah.
( Soft belch )
Ohh! Guh-ross, dad.
That was barely a burp.
Oh, yeah?
Was that a challenge?
All right.
( Belches )
Men. So juvenile.
You're just jealous.
Ew! Of what?
'Cause you can't let loose.
I've actually heard
dylan burp, a lot.
Dad, mute button, please.
In fact, she used to like
to try to out-burp me,
So we'd
have these contests.
No way.
Uh-huh.
That's classic!
I cannot believe you, dad.
Yeah, I can barely
believe it myself.
Prove it? Okay. Fine.
You both want to hear
what a burp really
sounds like?
Please.
Okay.
( Camera beeps )
Here we go.
( Belches )
Ah! Bravo!
Oh, the master has spoken.
Thank you, thank you.
I'll be here all week.
( Laughing )
So, your dad
is really cool.
I knew you two
would get along.
You both like those old,
black-and-white movies.
Mm. Classics.
Ohh! I can't believe
he gave me the keys back
To my dyl-ish mobile.
Maybe he should think
you're my boyfriend
more often.
Maybe he should.
Uh. So... Um...
You are, like, totally
erasing that footage
of me burping tonight.
Why? It's the real you.
Real is overrated.
I think I like
the real dylan more
than the cover story.
"What" and "ever"!
( Chuckles )
So, amy-- where
are you taking her
this weekend?
Uh... Haven't really
thought about it yet.
Do I have to do
everything myself?
Okay, so, asher's having
a party this weekend.
I can get you on
the invite list. Done.
I'm... Not sure
that's my thing.
I know what girls like,
remember?
Yeah.
'Bye.
Later.
Some great stuff here, josh.
How's editing?
Uh... I've just
been crammed lately.
Between shopping
with dylan on saturday,
And she came over
to my place for dinner
the other night...
I'll get to it.
I swear.
Right. Well...
The film festival board
needs to approve
the rough cut
Two days
before the festival.
I'm on top of it, mr. F.
I know what movie
I want to make.
Good.
( Knock on door )
Choir: ♪ aaahhh
Hi.
Oh, here.
Listen to this.
Okay.
It's blue tangerine's
new demo.
( Hard rock music playing )
It's not for everyone.
I... Could get used to it.
So...
( Giggles )
Shall we go?
Oh! Of course. Yes.
Right. Sorry.
After you.
( Soft chuckle )
So, what's the plan
for today?
I was thinkin', if it's
not too much to ask
on a first date,
Uh, take you home,
meet my mom.
Oh.
She's taking
great cooking classes.
She's making lamb
kabobs for lunch.
And I'm sure they're delish,
It's just that...
I'm a vegetarian.
Right.
I'm sorry.
Ah, no, it's okay.
Um... Except when
you're cravin' a burger.
How 'bout a movie?
Two hours in the dark,
on a day like this?
Okay, uh...
How 'bout a party?
Asher dumetz' place?
You're friends with
the volleyball dudes?
No. Not at all.
I'm glad
we cleared that up,
'cause, I don't know,
I don't usually
roll with that crowd.
Perfect.
But it should be
fun for a laugh.
Yeah?
Yeah.
All right.
One sec.
( Door squeaks )
Thank you.
Really?
( Distant laughter )
( Music playing )
♪ Yeah, everybody,
come on ♪
♪ Get your hands up
♪ Hands up,
shake it up, yeah ♪
( Music continuing )
Oh, wow.
♪ Let me see you
movin' now ♪
♪ Get your hands up,
hands up ♪
( Indistinct happy chatter )
♪ In the club now--
shake it up, mama ♪
♪ Let me see you
movin' now ♪
( Music continuing )
( Music continuing )
( Laughter )
Boy: atomic drop!
( Music continuing )
Wanna dance?
Wanna dance?
What?
Wanna dance?
I'm busy. Maybe later.
♪ Get your hands up,
hands up ♪
♪ Shake it up, yeah
♪ We gonna party now...
( Music continuing )
You're late!
Wait-- you invited us?
I knew josh would
have nowhere hip
to take you, so, yes.
You can hang out
with asher and me.
I think I'd...
Rather dance.
♪ Mama, let me
see you movin' now ♪
♪ Yeah
♪ Yeah, yeah
♪ Yeah
♪ Yeah, yeah
♪ You keep
knockin' me out ♪
♪ Beauty queen
with the title... ♪
Dancing isn't
really my thing.
Just go.
♪ You make me think
I'm on a cruise ♪
♪ 'Cause I love the way
you rock the boat ♪
♪ I take note on how
you breakin' it down ♪
♪ Shake it up, yeah
♪ We gonna party now
♪ Get it, get it
movin', yeah ♪
♪ We gonna holla' now
♪ In the club now
♪ Shake it up, mama
♪ Let me see you
movin' now ♪
( Music continuing )
Show-off.
I'm happy to see josh,
But... I kind of wish
he was on his own
So we could hang out more.
Weird, right?
( Music continuing )
Ugh!
Okay, I'll stop
torturing you.
( Music continuing )
We got dates for
the spring formal.
With the twins.
They're matching!
I'm with jay.
And I'm with danny.
Excellent, ladies.
We can triple-date,
with asher and me.
Anyone thirsty?
♪ In the club, now
♪ Shake it up, mama,
let me see you movin' now ♪
♪ Get your hands up,
hands up ♪
( Music continuing )
Whatcha lookin' for?
Lemonade.
Oops.
Took the last one.
Get used to that
loser feeling.
( Music continuing )
( Both laughing )
Amy: so, I was doing
my guitar solo,
And then an elephant
joined in on the drums.
Wow. That's awesome.
Go check on her.
W-what?
Sorry. It's just--
It's fine.
Are you sure?
Mm-hmm.
I'm gonna go see
if the deejay will
let me spin a few.
Okay.
Hey.
Why are you
by yourself?
Oh, I was just
taking a breather.
Where's amy?
Okay, what's your deal
with her, anyway?
Kind of ditched her
in the sixth grade.
Why? Amy's great.
Amygreat.
I was afraid
of always living
in her shadow.
You?
So I guess no thr*at of that
with hannah and lola.
Anyway, amy is downstairs
checking out music.
Uh-oh.
What-oh?
That means she's
b-o-r-e-d bored.
Seriously? What should I do?
Be romantic, dork.
Hold her hand.
What, do I just
grab it, or...?
Like this.
Then what?
When she talks to you,
you want to lean in,
Like this.
Hello!
( Dylan and josh
stammering )
Dylan had something
in her contact.
You wear contacts?
No, don't be silly.
Contacts?
I have totes
perfect vision.
Josh was just--
Just leaving!
I mean, who
invited him, anyway?
Asher, wait!
Nothing was happening!
Asher!
Dylan:
asher. Asher.
Excuse me. Sorry.
Asher! Asher, wait!
Call you later, ash.
W-what's going on?
Oh, nothing.
I'm just très fatigué.
But you never
leave parties early.
Well, I am now, okay?
( Dance music playing )
Look, there's nothing
going on with dylan, okay?
I believe you.
Um...
Would... You want to go
to the spring formal
with me?
Thanks, josh, but no.
Why not?
Look, I don't think
you're secretly
dating dylan,
But I think you want to.
What?
Okay, n-o spells "no."
Never.
You even sound like her.
I'm sorry.
Yeah.
Now, back away.
Go 'way.
And... Look!
And I'm free!
At the beach!
( Laughing )
No, no, no, no, no!
No, no, no!
No!
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
There you go.
Vote for paterson.
Hi, guys. Don't
forget to vote!
Vote for paterson.
Here you go.
Hello.
Vote for paterson.
Oh, here you go.
You have to vote, okay?
Dylan, what
are you doing?
Hannah... And lola.
Duh! I'm standing
right here.
What's with
the fire hydrant?
Oh.
I-i was just checking it.
You know-- safety first.
We don't have french
class until after lunch.
Yeah.
I was, uh, I was
just gonna study
for the pop quiz.
We have a pop quiz
in french?
You never know, right?
High, principal guthrie!
The pressures of
blossom queen...!
It's made her
totally snap.
( Class bell rings )
Look, I know the rough cut
deadline is tomorrow,
But is there any chance
I can get an extension?
I'd like to, but you
know I can't, josh.
As chair of
the film committee,
It would look like
I'm playing favorites.
What's really going on?
Honestly?
I need help
finishing the film.
Josh, just tell the truth.
Then your artistic
vision will shine through.
Artistic vision.
Got it.
Listen.
I'll talk to the film
festival board.
If you can edit something
by tomorrow morning,
I'll get them
to save your slot.
But I'm afraid
you haven't given
yourself enough time
To make something
worthy of first place.
He's right.
The post-republican period
Of the ancient
roman civilization
Was characterized by
an autocratic government.
An autocratic
form of government.
In the late
third century a.d.,
Diocletian established
the practice...
Here. Letter
from asher.
What does it say?
Oh, you know,
the usual.
He adores me.
Etcetera, etcetera.
Um, actually,
it says he's breaking
up with you--
Like, now.
What?!
Teacher: ...was forced
to abdicate.
You wear glasses?!
Teacher: this will
all be on the midterm.
( Indistinct comment )
Asher!
Asher! Asher, st--!
Dude!
Ha ha ha!
Asher!
What?
You're breaking up
with me, in a note?
What about spring formal?
Maybe josh can take you!
Hoo-ahh!
What's that
supposed to mean?
You've changed.
You hang with nerds now.
You're even dressing
like one.
No! Look, look, see?
I'm the same old dylan.
Hey, I'm not so sure
about that.
Lates.
( Indistinct comments
and snickering )
Hey.
Hey. I need
to talk to you.
Great. I need
to talk to you too.
Let's eat outside.
No, that's what I want
to talk to you about.
I-i can't have lunch
with you today,
Or any day until
after the film festival.
What?
I haven't finished
the movie yet, okay?
And I've got to stay
focused,
And I really,
really want to win
that film prize.
And I really want
to win blossom queen,
So you'd better not
mess this up, geek,
or I'll--
Or what? You gonna
ban me from the ramp?
Your seat's
already been taken.
( No audible dialogue )
The mummy,
original or remake?
Original directed
by karl freund,
Remake directed
by stephen sommers.
I would say original.
Remake.
Well. Look who
deigned to join us.
Well, as president
of the film club, i...
Not anymore.
What?!
It's just
you've been so busy
Going to parties
with populars lately...
Instead of coming
to the mathletes
scavenger hunt.
Guys, I am so sorry.
Okay, I completely
forgot.
Okay. We...
Decided to reelect
A new film club society
president in your absence.
What? Who?
Me!
Really?
Why don't you
go cry on your new
bff's shoulder?
I heard dylan and asher
are d-o-n-e done.
He dumped her.
( Shrieking )
( Laughing )
Sandy: dare I ask?
How's it goin'?
My friends expect one thing,
And dylan expects another.
Mr. Farley wants me
to tell the truth.
That's good advice.
Hey, mom, do you think
it's okay if my artistic
vision has changed?
Well... Yeah.
I think it's okay if
your feelings have changed.
I mean, your film
should be about
The dylan that
you've come to know.
Good night.
'Night.
Hey, don't stay up
too late, okay?
Yeah.
Stop it.
Testing, - - .
I love it!
( Laughter )
It feels like a cupcake.
So, what do you think
about this one?
Oh, it's so cute.
I love the sparkles.
Do you like my glove?
Oh, I love those.
Dylan. What are you
doing here?
This is my favorite
boutique.
I'm always here.
You're shopping for
spring formal without me?
Well, you're forever
off shopping with
josh these days.
Besides, we have dates
for the dance, and...
You don't anymore.
Lola.
Yes, get that dress.
You look gorgeous.
J'adore.
Marta, I'm home!
Hey, sweetie.
No plans with
josh tonight?
I think josh and me
are in a fight.
Over the movie?
I'm starting
to wonder if it was
Such a stellar idea
after all.
Tell you what:
Why don't we have dinner,
just the two of us?
I'm supposed to see amber,
but I can quickly
Give her a call
and cancel.
We'll order in.
I suppose your
girlfriend can join us.
Just once.
Really?
You... Are the best.
( Chuckles softly )
I know.
So I've noticed
that you have some...
( Continues indistinctly )
( Laughter
and happy chatter )
That'd be awesome.
So, maybe amber's
not my mom, but...
She's not so bad either.
And it convinced me to have
a little bit more faith in josh.
The movie will be fine...
( "Ride of the valkyries"
playing on movie soundtrack )
As they say
in show business,
break a leg.
Wait. You guys
still mad?
Nah. Geeks stick together.
( Mouths "hi" )
( Applause )
Right.
Well, thank you,
Josie belle bruno for
that fascinating film
About your pet hamster.
( Applause )
I certainly didn't know
that they were that vicious.
( Polite laughter )
Right. Well, I would
like to take this opportunity
To thank all the participants
in the festival.
Thank you.
Well, without further ado,
it gives me great pleasure
To introduce woodlands academy's
official submission,
Josh rosen and his
documentary called
The popularity project.
( Applause )
Popularity.
What is it?
According to
dylan schoenfield,
One of the most popular
girls at woodlands academy,
It's a lot of things.
Dylan: being popular
is so not easy.
We're in the movie!
...royalty
or the first lady.
You have to live up to
impossible standards of beauty,
And you're expected
to be a good influence.
Like, I help out
the less fortunate:
Fashion victims.
( Laughter )
Popularity's contagious.
What, like a cold?
Duh! It's why hannah
and lola battle
To be my better friend.
Their popularity
comes from mine.
( Laughter )
Josh: what are
your plans after school?
Pilates. But
not on tuesdays.
That's yoga.
( Laughter )
Josh:
when you graduate?
Hopes. Dreams.
What's your life goal?
Blossom queen.
( Laughter )
After that.
After?
If I don't win
blossom queen,
My life is officially
o-v-e-r, over.
( Laughter )
Josh: so, populars
only hang with populars.
Cats don't hang
with dogs, right?
Really?
That's your argument?
It's better this way.
If everyone stays
in their own group,
There's no chance
of misunderstandings.
Like... What kind
of misunderstandings?
Well... Take you
and me, for instance.
If we mingled outside of
doing my movie together,
You might get the wrong
idea and ask me out.
( Laughter )
Imagine the horror.
You'd be so embarrassed.
( Clears throat sharply )
( Laughter )
Did we get it?
Was that good?
( Laughter )
So, is dylan the cat...
Or the dawg?
( Laughter )
Are you getting
my good side?
This one right here?
Josh: could one person
be this shallow?
I chose dylan
as my documentary subject
Because
I wanted a challenge--
To uncover the truth
about popularity.
But I also wanted to make
something real.
I was determined to discover
the real dylan schoenfield.
Oh, no, the volleyball
game's over! Asher!
( Laughter )
Buh-bye!
À bientôt!
Bon voyage!
( Laughter )
Dylan, stop!
Stop!
What's wrong?
What's wrong?
The entire movie
is what's wrong,
And it wasn't enough
for you to embarrass me
in front of my friends--
You embarrassed me in
front of the entire city.
Embarrass you?
But I was trying
to show the real you.
And the real me
is humiliating.
I spent all
of middle school
and high school
Trying to get rid
of the real me
And perfect
the new dylan.
Dylan, i-i...
You don't get it,
and you never did.
I trusted you,
but you never
cared about me.
All you cared about
was that stupid movie!
That's not true!
It's not?
Just leave me alone, josh.
And by that,
I mean "for" and "ever."
Josh: so, the more
I got to know dylan,
I found out there's
lots of sides to her:
She can be funny,
And normal,
And full of life.
Josh!
Josh, look at this.
Zoom in. Look at it.
Josh, zoom in right here.
Right here, look.
Zoom in. Do you see that?
What's that say?
What's that say?
Hmm? Hmm?
"A+"!
Ha ha ha! Whoo!
( Audience laughing )
Yeah!
Stop it! Whaaaahhh!
( Audience laughing )
Josh: she can
also be sensitive
And vulnerable
And compassionate.
Is that your mom?
Yeah.
She met my dad
at the woodlands
spring formal.
Crazy, huh?
Wait.
Was your mom
blossom queen?
Back in the olden days.
.
I'll bet you miss her.
Lots.
Gets kind of lonely here
with just me and my dad.
So when you said there's
nothing more to life
Than winning blossom queen...
Yeah.
'Cause my mom...
If I win...
It's like we're
still connected...
Like she's still with me.
Josh: and as I discovered
the real dylan schoenfield,
I figured, yeah,
she might be popular,
She might really like shoes,
But she's more than that.
She's smart. And cool.
And real.
And that's the dylan
I wanted to show the world.
So, maybe the truth
didn't turn out to be
A hard-hitting exposé
on popularity,
But I don't care.
I have a new friend.
That's what really matters.
( Applause )
( Cartoon audio )
( Cartoon audio )
Hey.
Still hidden under
the frog planter,
Like in middle school.
What are you doing here?
Look, dylan...
Just because you stopped
being my friend in th grade
Doesn't mean
I stopped being yours.
I know you went through
a lot when your mom d*ed.
I get it.
I still get it.
I don't know what to say.
Which you know
for me never happens.
( Both laugh )
Josh is worried about you.
Yeah, right.
Josh's terrible movie
ruined me.
My life is o-v-e-r, over.
Josh's terrible movie
won the film festival.
You're more popular
than ever.
Josh gave me the dvd
for his movie.
Watch all of it,
And then tell me
if you're ruined.
♪ All the ladies
in the house ♪
♪ Let me hear you
scream and shout ♪
♪ Throw your hands
up in the air ♪
♪ Rollin'
like a millionaire ♪
♪ Raise 'em up, raise 'em up,
raise 'em up, raise 'em up ♪
♪ Oh-oh oh-oh,
oh-oh oh-oh ♪
♪ All the ladies
in the house ♪
♪ Let me hear you
scream and shout ♪
♪ Throw your hands
up in the air ♪
♪ Rollin'
like a millionaire ♪
♪ Raise 'em up, raise 'em up,
raise 'em up, raise 'em up ♪
♪ Oh-oh oh-oh
♪ Oh-oh oh-oh
Olivia: dylan!
Dylan! You're the most
popular girl at
woodlands ever!
There you are.
You don't have
to hang out
With the riff-raff
anymore. Come on.
Look! I got the dress!
You're right.
Your charity is fashion.
"What" and "ever."
It's nothing compared
to your dress, dyl.
Oh, that dress is so in,
like you.
Hey, dylan.
Lookin', uh, smokin'!
Amy: dylan.
Principal guthrie:
if I could have your attention.
Oh! It's starting!
Ladies and gentlemen.
It's time, people.
The moment I have...
Ahem... The moment you
have been all waiting for.
It's time to announce your
spring formal blossom queen.
( Sing-songy voice )
and let's just see...
And the winner is...
Dylan schoenfield!
( Applause )
Go up!
Whoo!
Well played, schoenfield,
well played.
Whoo!
Whoo-hoo!
( Applause subsides )
Whew.
Recently, a documentary
was made about me.
I know some of you
may have seen it.
( Gentle laughter )
Um, I would like to
give you all an update.
I was wrong about
that "cats and dogs" stuff.
Popularity isn't about
having everyone know
who you are
Or what you're wearing or...
Even winning blossom queen.
Popularity is about
having real friends
Who like you for you...
Not faux ones
who ditch you
Because a better offer
came along, or...
Bailed on you because
you became single
And didn't have a date
to spring formal anymore.
It's about real friends
Who you can count on,
Even if it's been,
like, forever
And they have pink
hair and stuff.
Friends who might not
always be into
The same things as you,
But who will always
be there to share
An everything-but-
the-kitchen-sink sundae.
It's not about
being popular,
or a geek.
( Giggles )
It's about being around
people who make you happy--
Like how I feel
about josh rosen.
( Applause )
( Music playing )
( Indistinct lyrics )
Ohh.
Hi.
Hi.
You won the film festival.
And you won blossom queen.
I couldn't have done it
without you.
Same here.
Amy showed me
the whole movie.
Oh. You finally
called it "the" movie.
Our movie.
So... Does it have
a happy ending?
You tell me.
Male vocalist:
♪ don't let them
♪ Take this away
( Music continuing )
♪ Words
♪ They mean nothing
♪ So you can't hurt me
True love prevails.
Guh-ross.
I think it's
kind of romantic.
Do you want to dance,
steven?
Does "e" equal "mc"...
...squared?
♪ Words
♪ They mean nothing
♪ So you can't
ohh!
♪ Hurt me... ♪
Hi.
Hi.
Wanna dance?
Huh?
What? Are you scared
or something?
( Chuckles )
me? Scared?
♪ Follow
♪ Your own path from here
♪ So don't listen
♪ To what they say
So that's our story.
The princess and the geek.
Film geek.
I'm sorry
I called you a nerd.
Sorry I called you
a diva.
So... I'm thinking sequel.
Sequels are never as good
as the original.
Everyone knows that.
♪ Your own path from here
♪ So don't
♪ Listen
♪ To what they say
♪ They don't know nothin'
Geek Charming (2011)
Moderator: Maskath3