07x10 - Double-Oh Schnozmo!/Planet Poof
Posted: 12/03/22 11:57
- ♪ Timmy is an average kid
♪ That no one understands
♪ Mom and dad and vicky always giving him commands ♪
- Bed, twerp!
- ♪ The doom and gloom up in his room ♪
♪ Is broken instantly
♪ By his magic little fish who grant his every wish ♪
♪ 'Cause in reality
♪ They are his oddparents
♪ Fairly oddparents
- Wands and wings.
- Float-y crown-y things.
- ♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪
♪ Really mod, pea pod, buff bod, hot rod ♪
- Obtuse, rubber goose, green moose, guava juice,
Giant snake, birthday cake, large fries, chocolate shake!
- ♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪
♪ It flips your lid when you are the kid ♪
♪ With fairly oddparents
- Yeah, right.
[Squeaking]
- Cosmo, you got a letter!
- Ooh! Which one?
"R"? "Z"? ?
Open it! Open it!
- Oh, no!
Uh...i mean, uh, congratulations!
You won a thousand-million dollars.
Okay, who wants pie?
- Ah-ha!
- "Dear cosmo,
I'm coming to visit because I need your help."
Signed, "schnosmo."
Who's schnosmo?
- Only the coolest, neatest,
Most awesome guy in the whole world.
And my brother!
- You have a brother?
How come I've never met him?
- Because schnosmo's always super busy!
He invented canada, found a cure for spaghetti,
And saved the walla walla monkeys from extinction.
And he's also a sensitive artist.
Slam! Clink!
Clang!
- More like a con artist.
I could never tell cosmo this, but I don't trust schnosmo.
Luckily, I hide my feelings rather well.
- Okay, everyone,
Time to play a game called
Hide under the bed until schnosmo leaves!
- Two words:
Schnosmo has arrived.
[Wanda groans]
- Yay! My big brother's here!
- Hey, hey, easy, easy. Watch the tux.
Boy, it's great to see you, cosmo!
Almost as great as you getting to see me.
Hello, wanda.
Heh-heh.
Two words:
Eat less and exercise.
- Welcome, schnosmo.
Please step over here to the security checkpoint.
[Beeping]
[Electronic warbling]
[Zapping]
- Fingerprints, scanners, and an x-ray machine?
Wanda, you're beautiful when you don't trust me.
- Then I must be really gorgeous.
Now, give me back my earrings!
- [Chuckles]
How'd those get in there?
- [Chomping]
- Who's this little charmer?
- That's your nephew, poof!
- [Chomping] [both scream]
- Hi, uncle schnosmo.
I'm-- - [stammers]
Now, don't tell me.
You're cosmo and wanda's godchild, lorenzo.
- Timmy.
- That's what I said. Hello?
- Schnosmo, you said you needed my help?
- Is there someplace safe we can talk?
Wait. I know.
- The truth is, I'm not just handsome,
Mild-mannered schnosmo anymore.
[Munching]
You're now looking at super handsome secret agent
Double-oh-schnosmo!
- F.a.i.r.i.e.:
The fairy alliance of international reconnaissance,
Intelligence, and espionage.
- Cosmo, I'm going to ask you a very important question.
Do...you...love...
Fairy world?
- Yes!
Is that the right answer?
- It sure is!
Now hand over your wand.
- Hold on!
What are you up to, schnosmo?
- Two words, wanda:
You need to lighten up.
Now, have you ever heard of the evil fiend
Known as dr. Maybe?
- No. - No.
- Maybe.
- Well, the villain stole my magic wand,
And I must get it back
Before he destroys all of fairy world.
- Wow!
So you're an honest-to-goodness secret agent?
- [Laughs]
Oh, schnosmo, this is your most ridiculous story yet!
There's no way cosmo's giving you his wand.
- [Grunting and smashing]
- Schnosmo, you must pay.
- Cosmo, give him your wand.
[Zapping]
[Zapping]
Smash!
- That was awesome!
- All in a day's work, fernando.
- It's timmy.
- That's what I said. Hello?
- Now I must go and defeat dr. Maybe.
Cosmo, I'll need to keep your wand
And this jar of pickles
And horatio's tv.
- Can we come watch you in action?
- Oh, I'm afraid it's too dangerous.
Stay alert. Cook me a ham.
I will return.
Good-bye. Farewell.
- Wow, my brother's the best.
I'm gonna make him the greatest ham
The world has ever seen!
- I guess I underestimated schnosmo.
He really is a super spy.
[Ninjas grunt]
- [Grunts] schnos-a-mo must pay!
- [Screams]
- [Effeminately] seriously.
$..
He ran off without paying...again.
- The hungry ninja japanese restaurant?
- I knew it!
Schnosmo's not a super spy.
He's just super cheap.
And my earrings are gone again!
Come on, we've got a con to catch!
Okay, I tracked your freeloading brother
To this island.
- Silly wanda!
I'm sure all this confusion
Is a part of schnosmo's top secret spy plan.
- Stay back, dr. Maybe!
Is what I would say if dr. Maybe was real,
And I was really a spy instead of just a clever fairy
Who's using his idiot brother's wand
To have the greatest vacation ever!
Ooh, time for a snide cackle.
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha, ha.
- I don't understand.
Schnosmo lied?
And after I made him this beautiful ham?
I believed in schnosmo.
He must think I'm the biggest fool in the world.
[Sobs]
- Hey! It's raining ham!
What a great island!
- Okay, that does it!
- Two words:
How did you morons find me?
- My earrings have a tracking device in them.
- Curses!
I mean...shh!
Dr. Maybe lies in wait.
- The only one lying around here is you, schnosmo.
And now you've broken cosmo's heart.
- What? He's my brother.
I would never want to hurt him.
- Well, you did.
And now you're gonna fix it.
Find cosmo and tell him dr. Maybe is real.
- [Span]the evil dr. Maybe:[/span]
[Span]a play in one act[/span]by wanda?
- You're going to learn these lines
And pretend to be the brave spy your brother thinks you are.
- Two words:
Not a chance.
- [Zapping]
Two more words:
That really smarts.
See you on the set.
- What do you want?
You've already taken my trust...
And my ham.
- "Cosmo, you have to help me.
"I was pretending to be a liar to throw off dr. Maybe,
But he's on to me now."
- Yay!
I knew you were lying when you said you were lying!
- I promise I will never...
Lie to you again.
Now let's defeat dr. Maybe.
- [Growling and snarling]
[Both scream]
- The evil volcanic lair of the dreaded dr. Maybe.
Neat!
Is he here?
- Maybe.
- Poof-poof! Meow! Poof!
- Two words: you've got to be kidding.
Zap!
I mean--
"We meet again, dr. Maybe!"
- Double-oh-schnosmo, I have been expecting you.
I am sure you remember my assistant, curlfinger.
- I've come for my wand, dr. Maybe.
I bet I will find it
If I dive into this pit of angry alligators.
Wait. What?
Ahhhh!
- Wow, you sure are brave, schnosmo!
- [Yelping]
Dr. Maybe,
You must have hidden my wand
At the end of your fiendish buzz saw garden.
Oh, come on!
[Yelps]
- Way to show those buzz saws who's boss, brother!
- Double-oh-schnosmo,
The wand is definitely not hidden
Behind this wall.
If I were you, I wouldn't press this button.
- At this point,
Only an idiot would press that button.
- On it!
Beep!
- Roar!
- Two words:
This script is garbage, and I quit.
Ugh.
Bam! Bam!
Ay-yai-yai!
[Screams] thud!
[Moans]
- Poof!
This isn't in the script!
Dr. Maybe, make the octobot stop!
- I can't!
Zee controls are jammed!
- I'll stop it!
- Our wands!
- Ah! - Ah!
[Both scream]
- Don't worry, evil guys!
Double-oh-schnosmo will save us!
Once he gets back from wherever he's running away to!
He's a hero,
Not a horrible, rotten,
Inconsiderate, selfish liar!
- Fear not, cosmo!
Double-oh-schnosmo to the rescue!
Ha, ha-ha, ha, ha.
Smash!
Ha, ha-ha, ha, ha.
[Blows raspberry]
[Whirring]
[Zapping]
Clang!
[Zapping]
Boom!
[All screaming]
- [Grunts]
I picked a good day to start wearing underpants.
- Dr. Maybe surrenders.
- That was amazing, schnosmo!
I can't wait to tell wanda and timmy
All about how wonderful you are.
- I think they already know.
- Thank you...curlfinger.
But if you're going to wear that leotard,
Two words: don't.
- Dr. Maybe, you stole my brother's wand.
Can you please give it back?
- Dr. Maybe can't, but I can!
[All scream]
- [Screams]
- Schnosmo, I took your wand away
Because you repeatedly dined and dashed
At the hungry ninja restaurant,
A delightfully themed and moderately priced
Eating establishment of which I am part owner,
But because of your bravery today,
I now return it to you.
- Thank you, jorgen.
- Just eat somewhere else from now on, huh?
- Nice job, jennifer.
- It's schnosmo.
- That's what I said. Hello?
- Jorgen? Wanda?
Lorenzo?
Okay, I'm really confused.
But since that's how I normally am,
It just feels right!
- Come on, cosmo,
Let's take your brother to dinner
So he can tell us more about being a super spy.
- Oh, I know a great restaurant.
Dinner's on me!
- Hey!
Where is my wallet?
And my earrings?
Schnosmo!
- Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha, ha.
- Ladies and gentlemen!
[Bell dings]
In this corner,
Weighing in at pounds, not counting his teeth,
It's timmy tornado!
- [Growls]
- And in this corner, weighing in at--
- Don't even say it, cosmo.
- It's the whirling curler!
Smack! [Grunts]
- [Grunts]
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Smash! [Screams]
- Well, it's close,
But I'm gonna have to give that round to wanda.
- [Spits]
- Poof! Poof?
Vroom-vroom?
- Aw, I can't play spaceman now, poof.
Your mom and I don't want to miss the first beatdown
Between the nuclear nacho and the blazing burrito.
- Nuclear nacho, here we come!
[Whirring]
- Vroom-vroom?
- Sorry, daddy can't play with you now, poof.
Ooh, look, a tooth!
Be out in a minute, poof.
I just got to find my wand.
[Clanking] ow! Thumbtacks.
- [Gurgles]
[Giggles]
Beep!
[Whirring boom]
[Mom and dad scream]
- Whee!
Yippee!
- Oh, queen!
Your king demands food!
- Bad morning, my king!
Look at this sewage sculpture I made
To immortalize your lovely hideousness!
- [Gobbling]
Burp!
- But I spent the last six months making that.
- [Munching] did you say something?
I couldn't hear you over the sound of me chewing.
- Now fetch me some garbage bonbons!
- You know, sometimes I feel like
Everyone takes advantage of my kindly, queenly nature.
- Ridiculous!
No one does that.
[Whooshing]
Thud!
- Mom!
'Sup?
I've come to totally take advantage
Of your kindly, queenly nature.
I brought my clean laundry for you to dirty up.
- She can't do your laundry now, mark.
She's feeding me bonbons!
- She can't feed you bonbons.
She's gonna do my laundry!
- Bonbons, bonbons, bonbons!
- Laundry, laundry, laundry!
- [Screams]
I wish someone would pay attention
To my needs for a change.
- [Giggling]
Crash!
[All gasp]
[Gasping]
[Gasping]
- [Giggles]
- [Screams]
It's terrifyingly adorable!
You take it.
- [Screams]
- [Screams]
- [Screams]
- [Screams]
- [Screams]
- [Screams]
Just keep the hideous beast away,
And I'll do anything you ask!
- Wait.
Anything?
- [Giggles]
- You just want a little attention, don't you?
And so do i.
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
- Poof! Poof!
- I'll take that as a yes!
- People of yugopotamia,
Behold your new emperor!
- [Screams]
- [Stammers]
Wait. Wait.
Who says he's the new emperor?
- Poof! Poof!
- Fine! He's the new emperor!
I'm too terrified to argue!
- The emperor orders you to listen to everything I say
And obey my every whim,
And my first whim is for bonbons.
- [Sobbing]
- This is so bogus!
That's not a emperor.
That's just timmy turner's magic little bro--
Smack! [Screams]
[Smacking and grunting]
Crash! [Screams]
- I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship!
- That wrestling match was awesome!
I can't believe we caught a tooth!
- Ooh, a tooth?
I'm collecting those!
Clink! Ow!
Okay, now I'm collecting scars.
- Cosmo, what are you doing in the vacuum cleaner?
- Vacuuming.
Duh!
- And where's poof?
- Mark chang?
- No, dude, it's just a hologram of me.
Ooh, hologram.
Yo, timmy, can you come to my planet pronto
And pick up your little bro?
- Poof's on yugopotamia?
- Sh-yah!
He's making my mom act totally crazy...
Er!
Just get here quick!
Help me, timmy turner.
You're my only hope!
Later.
- This probe will self-destruct in three seconds.
Three, two, one.
Boom!
- Well, on the bright side,
I got a lot more teeth for my collection.
- Oh, my baby's on yugopotamia!
It's a cruel and dangerous planet!
I can only imagine what horrible things they're doing to him!
[Cheering]
- Vroom! Vroom!
All: vroom! Vroom!
- Whoosh! Whoosh!
All: whoosh! Whoosh!
- That's right, citizens!
The emperor wants you to keep playing...
And bowing to me...
Or else.
And keep fanning me, peon.
- [Gasping]
But my tentacles are cramping.
[Screams]
I mean, yes, my queen!
- So very...
Bogus!
- Wow.
It looks like poof's finally playing spaceman
Like he wanted to.
- Vroom! Vroom!
[Giggles]
All: vroom vroom! - What do you know?
We wouldn't play with poof,
So he got a whole planet to play with him!
- Well, playtime's over.
My baby's going home!
- The emperor's not going anywhere.
Guards!
- Cosmo, quick! We need your wand!
- Still looking for it!
Let's see, mouse trap-- ow!
Lawn dart-- ow!
Taser-- ow!
- Turner!
You're fi-nall-y here to get your little bro--
Smack! [Screams]
[Smacking and grunting]
Crash! [Screams]
- I'm so sorry I can't let you take the emperor.
- But he's not your emperor.
He's my baby!
- Tough tentacles, lady.
I sentence you, timmy,
And your talking vacuum cleaner
To spend eternity in the belly
Of the truly terrifying desert monster,
Jeremy.
[All gasp]
- Don't worry, guys.
With a name like jeremy, how terrifying can he be?
- [Roaring]
[Both scream]
[All screaming]
- Don't worry, I'll pull you out!
Suction powers, activate!
[Screams]
Hot sand in my eyes!
And who left a box of nails out here?
[All screaming]
- Sh-yah, dudes,
This is no time to be playing with jere-magh.
- Thanks for saving us, mark.
Now to get poof back.
- Can we stop somewhere first and suck up a doctor?
- [Giggles]
Poof! Poof!
- The emperor commands rub the queen's feet.
- But you have so many of them.
[Screams]
I mean, yes, my queen!
Crash!
- You?
You're alive?
- Well, barely.
- And now we're finally taking poof away
From this crazy, nutzo planet.
- What makes you think he even wants to go with you?
- Poof, were sorry we didn't play with you today,
But you have to come home with us.
- We promise we'll play spaceman all you want.
- Poof! Poof! [Giggles]
- Baby!
- Mama!
- Yeah, he wants to go with us.
See ya!
- That's not what he said.
The emperor commands the guards
To feed timmy and his friends to heather.
- Who's heather?
- Jeremy's big sister.
She's a teenager, so she's really cranky.
- Like, I'm so cranky.
- Guards!
[Zapping]
- No one's separating me from my baby again!
Time for a beatdown.
Smack!
Whack! Pow!
- Okay, poof,
Let's play!
- I'll get their weapons.
Deep shag setting, activate!
- Ah! Ooh!
Yelp! Oof!
- [Gasps]
- [Gasps]
[All gasp]
[All scream]
- Tornado powers, activate!
[All scream]
Crash!
- Poof! Poof!
- Um, the emperor says-- uh...
He still wants to stay with me?
- Now, I may not be
The sharpest knife in the drawer--
- Nope, that one's in my spleen.
- But I'm beginning to think the emperor isn't saying
What you say he's saying.
- Busted!
[Screams]
Hate dropping down.
- I'm sorry!
I made the whole thing up.
He just wanted to play,
And I wanted someone to pay attention to me!
- Well, honey,
Why didn't you just say something?
- I did!
- [Stammers]
Okay, okay, how about I take you out
To a romantic dinner at the sewage treatment plant?
- Well, that's a start.
You big lug.
[Smooching]
- Parental displays of affection are most unsavory.
[Gags]
- I'll miss you, hideously cute baby.
- Poof! Poof!
- Come on, guys.
I want to go home
And play with my awesome baby brother.
- I got to go home and empty my bag.
If I suck up one more thing, I'm gonna explode.
Ooh, a bonbon!
[expl*si*n]
Boy, that's a relief!
- [Stammers] wait, wait.
♪ That no one understands
♪ Mom and dad and vicky always giving him commands ♪
- Bed, twerp!
- ♪ The doom and gloom up in his room ♪
♪ Is broken instantly
♪ By his magic little fish who grant his every wish ♪
♪ 'Cause in reality
♪ They are his oddparents
♪ Fairly oddparents
- Wands and wings.
- Float-y crown-y things.
- ♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪
♪ Really mod, pea pod, buff bod, hot rod ♪
- Obtuse, rubber goose, green moose, guava juice,
Giant snake, birthday cake, large fries, chocolate shake!
- ♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪
♪ It flips your lid when you are the kid ♪
♪ With fairly oddparents
- Yeah, right.
[Squeaking]
- Cosmo, you got a letter!
- Ooh! Which one?
"R"? "Z"? ?
Open it! Open it!
- Oh, no!
Uh...i mean, uh, congratulations!
You won a thousand-million dollars.
Okay, who wants pie?
- Ah-ha!
- "Dear cosmo,
I'm coming to visit because I need your help."
Signed, "schnosmo."
Who's schnosmo?
- Only the coolest, neatest,
Most awesome guy in the whole world.
And my brother!
- You have a brother?
How come I've never met him?
- Because schnosmo's always super busy!
He invented canada, found a cure for spaghetti,
And saved the walla walla monkeys from extinction.
And he's also a sensitive artist.
Slam! Clink!
Clang!
- More like a con artist.
I could never tell cosmo this, but I don't trust schnosmo.
Luckily, I hide my feelings rather well.
- Okay, everyone,
Time to play a game called
Hide under the bed until schnosmo leaves!
- Two words:
Schnosmo has arrived.
[Wanda groans]
- Yay! My big brother's here!
- Hey, hey, easy, easy. Watch the tux.
Boy, it's great to see you, cosmo!
Almost as great as you getting to see me.
Hello, wanda.
Heh-heh.
Two words:
Eat less and exercise.
- Welcome, schnosmo.
Please step over here to the security checkpoint.
[Beeping]
[Electronic warbling]
[Zapping]
- Fingerprints, scanners, and an x-ray machine?
Wanda, you're beautiful when you don't trust me.
- Then I must be really gorgeous.
Now, give me back my earrings!
- [Chuckles]
How'd those get in there?
- [Chomping]
- Who's this little charmer?
- That's your nephew, poof!
- [Chomping] [both scream]
- Hi, uncle schnosmo.
I'm-- - [stammers]
Now, don't tell me.
You're cosmo and wanda's godchild, lorenzo.
- Timmy.
- That's what I said. Hello?
- Schnosmo, you said you needed my help?
- Is there someplace safe we can talk?
Wait. I know.
- The truth is, I'm not just handsome,
Mild-mannered schnosmo anymore.
[Munching]
You're now looking at super handsome secret agent
Double-oh-schnosmo!
- F.a.i.r.i.e.:
The fairy alliance of international reconnaissance,
Intelligence, and espionage.
- Cosmo, I'm going to ask you a very important question.
Do...you...love...
Fairy world?
- Yes!
Is that the right answer?
- It sure is!
Now hand over your wand.
- Hold on!
What are you up to, schnosmo?
- Two words, wanda:
You need to lighten up.
Now, have you ever heard of the evil fiend
Known as dr. Maybe?
- No. - No.
- Maybe.
- Well, the villain stole my magic wand,
And I must get it back
Before he destroys all of fairy world.
- Wow!
So you're an honest-to-goodness secret agent?
- [Laughs]
Oh, schnosmo, this is your most ridiculous story yet!
There's no way cosmo's giving you his wand.
- [Grunting and smashing]
- Schnosmo, you must pay.
- Cosmo, give him your wand.
[Zapping]
[Zapping]
Smash!
- That was awesome!
- All in a day's work, fernando.
- It's timmy.
- That's what I said. Hello?
- Now I must go and defeat dr. Maybe.
Cosmo, I'll need to keep your wand
And this jar of pickles
And horatio's tv.
- Can we come watch you in action?
- Oh, I'm afraid it's too dangerous.
Stay alert. Cook me a ham.
I will return.
Good-bye. Farewell.
- Wow, my brother's the best.
I'm gonna make him the greatest ham
The world has ever seen!
- I guess I underestimated schnosmo.
He really is a super spy.
[Ninjas grunt]
- [Grunts] schnos-a-mo must pay!
- [Screams]
- [Effeminately] seriously.
$..
He ran off without paying...again.
- The hungry ninja japanese restaurant?
- I knew it!
Schnosmo's not a super spy.
He's just super cheap.
And my earrings are gone again!
Come on, we've got a con to catch!
Okay, I tracked your freeloading brother
To this island.
- Silly wanda!
I'm sure all this confusion
Is a part of schnosmo's top secret spy plan.
- Stay back, dr. Maybe!
Is what I would say if dr. Maybe was real,
And I was really a spy instead of just a clever fairy
Who's using his idiot brother's wand
To have the greatest vacation ever!
Ooh, time for a snide cackle.
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha, ha.
- I don't understand.
Schnosmo lied?
And after I made him this beautiful ham?
I believed in schnosmo.
He must think I'm the biggest fool in the world.
[Sobs]
- Hey! It's raining ham!
What a great island!
- Okay, that does it!
- Two words:
How did you morons find me?
- My earrings have a tracking device in them.
- Curses!
I mean...shh!
Dr. Maybe lies in wait.
- The only one lying around here is you, schnosmo.
And now you've broken cosmo's heart.
- What? He's my brother.
I would never want to hurt him.
- Well, you did.
And now you're gonna fix it.
Find cosmo and tell him dr. Maybe is real.
- [Span]the evil dr. Maybe:[/span]
[Span]a play in one act[/span]by wanda?
- You're going to learn these lines
And pretend to be the brave spy your brother thinks you are.
- Two words:
Not a chance.
- [Zapping]
Two more words:
That really smarts.
See you on the set.
- What do you want?
You've already taken my trust...
And my ham.
- "Cosmo, you have to help me.
"I was pretending to be a liar to throw off dr. Maybe,
But he's on to me now."
- Yay!
I knew you were lying when you said you were lying!
- I promise I will never...
Lie to you again.
Now let's defeat dr. Maybe.
- [Growling and snarling]
[Both scream]
- The evil volcanic lair of the dreaded dr. Maybe.
Neat!
Is he here?
- Maybe.
- Poof-poof! Meow! Poof!
- Two words: you've got to be kidding.
Zap!
I mean--
"We meet again, dr. Maybe!"
- Double-oh-schnosmo, I have been expecting you.
I am sure you remember my assistant, curlfinger.
- I've come for my wand, dr. Maybe.
I bet I will find it
If I dive into this pit of angry alligators.
Wait. What?
Ahhhh!
- Wow, you sure are brave, schnosmo!
- [Yelping]
Dr. Maybe,
You must have hidden my wand
At the end of your fiendish buzz saw garden.
Oh, come on!
[Yelps]
- Way to show those buzz saws who's boss, brother!
- Double-oh-schnosmo,
The wand is definitely not hidden
Behind this wall.
If I were you, I wouldn't press this button.
- At this point,
Only an idiot would press that button.
- On it!
Beep!
- Roar!
- Two words:
This script is garbage, and I quit.
Ugh.
Bam! Bam!
Ay-yai-yai!
[Screams] thud!
[Moans]
- Poof!
This isn't in the script!
Dr. Maybe, make the octobot stop!
- I can't!
Zee controls are jammed!
- I'll stop it!
- Our wands!
- Ah! - Ah!
[Both scream]
- Don't worry, evil guys!
Double-oh-schnosmo will save us!
Once he gets back from wherever he's running away to!
He's a hero,
Not a horrible, rotten,
Inconsiderate, selfish liar!
- Fear not, cosmo!
Double-oh-schnosmo to the rescue!
Ha, ha-ha, ha, ha.
Smash!
Ha, ha-ha, ha, ha.
[Blows raspberry]
[Whirring]
[Zapping]
Clang!
[Zapping]
Boom!
[All screaming]
- [Grunts]
I picked a good day to start wearing underpants.
- Dr. Maybe surrenders.
- That was amazing, schnosmo!
I can't wait to tell wanda and timmy
All about how wonderful you are.
- I think they already know.
- Thank you...curlfinger.
But if you're going to wear that leotard,
Two words: don't.
- Dr. Maybe, you stole my brother's wand.
Can you please give it back?
- Dr. Maybe can't, but I can!
[All scream]
- [Screams]
- Schnosmo, I took your wand away
Because you repeatedly dined and dashed
At the hungry ninja restaurant,
A delightfully themed and moderately priced
Eating establishment of which I am part owner,
But because of your bravery today,
I now return it to you.
- Thank you, jorgen.
- Just eat somewhere else from now on, huh?
- Nice job, jennifer.
- It's schnosmo.
- That's what I said. Hello?
- Jorgen? Wanda?
Lorenzo?
Okay, I'm really confused.
But since that's how I normally am,
It just feels right!
- Come on, cosmo,
Let's take your brother to dinner
So he can tell us more about being a super spy.
- Oh, I know a great restaurant.
Dinner's on me!
- Hey!
Where is my wallet?
And my earrings?
Schnosmo!
- Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha, ha.
- Ladies and gentlemen!
[Bell dings]
In this corner,
Weighing in at pounds, not counting his teeth,
It's timmy tornado!
- [Growls]
- And in this corner, weighing in at--
- Don't even say it, cosmo.
- It's the whirling curler!
Smack! [Grunts]
- [Grunts]
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Smash! [Screams]
- Well, it's close,
But I'm gonna have to give that round to wanda.
- [Spits]
- Poof! Poof?
Vroom-vroom?
- Aw, I can't play spaceman now, poof.
Your mom and I don't want to miss the first beatdown
Between the nuclear nacho and the blazing burrito.
- Nuclear nacho, here we come!
[Whirring]
- Vroom-vroom?
- Sorry, daddy can't play with you now, poof.
Ooh, look, a tooth!
Be out in a minute, poof.
I just got to find my wand.
[Clanking] ow! Thumbtacks.
- [Gurgles]
[Giggles]
Beep!
[Whirring boom]
[Mom and dad scream]
- Whee!
Yippee!
- Oh, queen!
Your king demands food!
- Bad morning, my king!
Look at this sewage sculpture I made
To immortalize your lovely hideousness!
- [Gobbling]
Burp!
- But I spent the last six months making that.
- [Munching] did you say something?
I couldn't hear you over the sound of me chewing.
- Now fetch me some garbage bonbons!
- You know, sometimes I feel like
Everyone takes advantage of my kindly, queenly nature.
- Ridiculous!
No one does that.
[Whooshing]
Thud!
- Mom!
'Sup?
I've come to totally take advantage
Of your kindly, queenly nature.
I brought my clean laundry for you to dirty up.
- She can't do your laundry now, mark.
She's feeding me bonbons!
- She can't feed you bonbons.
She's gonna do my laundry!
- Bonbons, bonbons, bonbons!
- Laundry, laundry, laundry!
- [Screams]
I wish someone would pay attention
To my needs for a change.
- [Giggling]
Crash!
[All gasp]
[Gasping]
[Gasping]
- [Giggles]
- [Screams]
It's terrifyingly adorable!
You take it.
- [Screams]
- [Screams]
- [Screams]
- [Screams]
- [Screams]
- [Screams]
Just keep the hideous beast away,
And I'll do anything you ask!
- Wait.
Anything?
- [Giggles]
- You just want a little attention, don't you?
And so do i.
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
- Poof! Poof!
- I'll take that as a yes!
- People of yugopotamia,
Behold your new emperor!
- [Screams]
- [Stammers]
Wait. Wait.
Who says he's the new emperor?
- Poof! Poof!
- Fine! He's the new emperor!
I'm too terrified to argue!
- The emperor orders you to listen to everything I say
And obey my every whim,
And my first whim is for bonbons.
- [Sobbing]
- This is so bogus!
That's not a emperor.
That's just timmy turner's magic little bro--
Smack! [Screams]
[Smacking and grunting]
Crash! [Screams]
- I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship!
- That wrestling match was awesome!
I can't believe we caught a tooth!
- Ooh, a tooth?
I'm collecting those!
Clink! Ow!
Okay, now I'm collecting scars.
- Cosmo, what are you doing in the vacuum cleaner?
- Vacuuming.
Duh!
- And where's poof?
- Mark chang?
- No, dude, it's just a hologram of me.
Ooh, hologram.
Yo, timmy, can you come to my planet pronto
And pick up your little bro?
- Poof's on yugopotamia?
- Sh-yah!
He's making my mom act totally crazy...
Er!
Just get here quick!
Help me, timmy turner.
You're my only hope!
Later.
- This probe will self-destruct in three seconds.
Three, two, one.
Boom!
- Well, on the bright side,
I got a lot more teeth for my collection.
- Oh, my baby's on yugopotamia!
It's a cruel and dangerous planet!
I can only imagine what horrible things they're doing to him!
[Cheering]
- Vroom! Vroom!
All: vroom! Vroom!
- Whoosh! Whoosh!
All: whoosh! Whoosh!
- That's right, citizens!
The emperor wants you to keep playing...
And bowing to me...
Or else.
And keep fanning me, peon.
- [Gasping]
But my tentacles are cramping.
[Screams]
I mean, yes, my queen!
- So very...
Bogus!
- Wow.
It looks like poof's finally playing spaceman
Like he wanted to.
- Vroom! Vroom!
[Giggles]
All: vroom vroom! - What do you know?
We wouldn't play with poof,
So he got a whole planet to play with him!
- Well, playtime's over.
My baby's going home!
- The emperor's not going anywhere.
Guards!
- Cosmo, quick! We need your wand!
- Still looking for it!
Let's see, mouse trap-- ow!
Lawn dart-- ow!
Taser-- ow!
- Turner!
You're fi-nall-y here to get your little bro--
Smack! [Screams]
[Smacking and grunting]
Crash! [Screams]
- I'm so sorry I can't let you take the emperor.
- But he's not your emperor.
He's my baby!
- Tough tentacles, lady.
I sentence you, timmy,
And your talking vacuum cleaner
To spend eternity in the belly
Of the truly terrifying desert monster,
Jeremy.
[All gasp]
- Don't worry, guys.
With a name like jeremy, how terrifying can he be?
- [Roaring]
[Both scream]
[All screaming]
- Don't worry, I'll pull you out!
Suction powers, activate!
[Screams]
Hot sand in my eyes!
And who left a box of nails out here?
[All screaming]
- Sh-yah, dudes,
This is no time to be playing with jere-magh.
- Thanks for saving us, mark.
Now to get poof back.
- Can we stop somewhere first and suck up a doctor?
- [Giggles]
Poof! Poof!
- The emperor commands rub the queen's feet.
- But you have so many of them.
[Screams]
I mean, yes, my queen!
Crash!
- You?
You're alive?
- Well, barely.
- And now we're finally taking poof away
From this crazy, nutzo planet.
- What makes you think he even wants to go with you?
- Poof, were sorry we didn't play with you today,
But you have to come home with us.
- We promise we'll play spaceman all you want.
- Poof! Poof! [Giggles]
- Baby!
- Mama!
- Yeah, he wants to go with us.
See ya!
- That's not what he said.
The emperor commands the guards
To feed timmy and his friends to heather.
- Who's heather?
- Jeremy's big sister.
She's a teenager, so she's really cranky.
- Like, I'm so cranky.
- Guards!
[Zapping]
- No one's separating me from my baby again!
Time for a beatdown.
Smack!
Whack! Pow!
- Okay, poof,
Let's play!
- I'll get their weapons.
Deep shag setting, activate!
- Ah! Ooh!
Yelp! Oof!
- [Gasps]
- [Gasps]
[All gasp]
[All scream]
- Tornado powers, activate!
[All scream]
Crash!
- Poof! Poof!
- Um, the emperor says-- uh...
He still wants to stay with me?
- Now, I may not be
The sharpest knife in the drawer--
- Nope, that one's in my spleen.
- But I'm beginning to think the emperor isn't saying
What you say he's saying.
- Busted!
[Screams]
Hate dropping down.
- I'm sorry!
I made the whole thing up.
He just wanted to play,
And I wanted someone to pay attention to me!
- Well, honey,
Why didn't you just say something?
- I did!
- [Stammers]
Okay, okay, how about I take you out
To a romantic dinner at the sewage treatment plant?
- Well, that's a start.
You big lug.
[Smooching]
- Parental displays of affection are most unsavory.
[Gags]
- I'll miss you, hideously cute baby.
- Poof! Poof!
- Come on, guys.
I want to go home
And play with my awesome baby brother.
- I got to go home and empty my bag.
If I suck up one more thing, I'm gonna explode.
Ooh, a bonbon!
[expl*si*n]
Boy, that's a relief!
- [Stammers] wait, wait.