01x08 - Looking Glass

[Softly] Oooh, f*ck f*ck f*ck f*ck f*ck.

[Exhales]

[Chattering]

[Buzzing]

Hey. Can I, uh, talk to you?

[Speaks Spanish]

Come on, let's go outside.

Yeah.

Look, I know there's a slightly creepy stalker aspect to me showing up at your job...

Can I help you?

"Can I help you?"

Yeah, I'm at work, so...

Yeah no, I know. I just thought...

I left you so many messages yesterday and you didn't pick up the whole day.

I know.

Patrick...

Yeah?

If I didn't pick up it's because...

I don't want to talk.

Oh. [Laughs] Okay.

I just...

I need you to give me some space, okay?

Space like space space? Or space like a break...

Can you just give me some space, please?

I don't want to say something I'm gonna regret.

Yeah.

No, I...

I guess I shouldn't have... yeah.

Sorry.

I'm gonna get back to work.

I'll call you when I'm ready.

Okay.

[Music on radio playing softly]

[Door opens]

Are you okay?

Uh-huh.

Where were you?

I spent the night at Jesse's.

Okay. I was worried.

You haven't made much progress.

Listen, I don't think the two of us have talked about this properly, okay?

Not the way that two people who've been together this long should.

You know, you can't just storm off.

You did not just say that.

Can you at least hear me out, please?

Yes, okay, I've been the worst f*cking boyfriend to you, when all you've ever been is supportive.

Are you listening, Frank?

This thing that I did...

This thing with paying CJ and not telling you...

It was wrong on every level and I can...

Totally, I admit it now.

Can you please come out here and talk to me?

You don't want to hear what I've got to say.

No, I do. And I totally... I deserve it.

Okay? I can f*cking take it.

I know that I've been an unbelievable...

No, huh-uh. You don't know what you've been, because you don't know who the f*ck you are.

You're not who you think you are, Agustín, and you're certainly not who I thought I've been dating this whole time.

Okay, that's...

Nuh-uh-uh.

That whole concept you concocted with that little hustler? [Scoffs]

It's nothing but the musings of a bored rich kid.

Okay, wait...

Let's...

Let's be honest.

You were never gonna be an artist.

And if you ever do follow through with something, it's gonna be mediocre at best.

Well...

Leave the key under the mat.

[Door opens, closes]

Has anyone seen the candles?

They were here yesterday.

Black crate.

Oh, yeah, got 'em.

[Sighs] [Chattering]

[Sighs]

Hey, Lynn, it's me.

Um...

I'm just here at the restaurant...

And everything's going pretty smooth, I think.

Um, I just wanted to check in about the delivery today.

We decided on the ones with the... oops...

Silver vase.

And I don't know how else you describe them, but we like those so...

[Clangs]

I'll get it.

Anyway, everything's fine and...

I'm seeing you tonight, right?

Okay, bye.

Are we good?

Perfect.

What the f*ck?

[Phone ringing]

So as we regroup on this...

I want some new ideas.

Uh...

Sorry, guys.

Uh, let's step back from the simple binaries that we're used to.

So I'm gonna take a look at 3A 'cause it needs something else.

I don't know what it is yet, but I'm sure we'll figure it out, so let's get on with that.

[Door opens, closes]

[Traffic sounds]

Hey.

Hey. [Chuckles]

I wondered where you'd got to.

I'm sorry. Did you need me?

Uh, no no.

I was... I was...

I was just wondering if you were okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Wow.

This is nice up here.

Mm-hmm.

I didn't even know we had this.

Wow. That view is...

Yeah, it's good.

Yeah.

So, Patrick, I just want to say how totally and utterly embarrassed I am about last night.

Seriously, you know, you don't need to do this.

Well, I have been worried about it.

You know, it's weddings.

It's weddings. They make me crazy, and obviously I was pretty wasted.

No, I mean it. You really don't need to say anything.

Okay well, I feel like I do, so...

I don't want this to make things weird between us.

I really like what we've got going on here.

We've got a really good working relationship.

Listen, let's just not talk about it, okay?

Really.

Patrick...

It's just water under the bridge. I mean it.

It's done.

Okay.

Okay, well then, I'm gonna go.

I'll see you down there.

Yeah.

Um...

Yeah.

[Door opens]

[Door closes]

[Chattering]

Oh, all right. It's cool. Later.

[Man speaking on P.A.]

[Music playing through headphones]

Oh my God, are people offering you spare change?

Oh, my paddy-cakes.

[Laughs] What's happening right now?

Come here.

Hi.

Mwah.

Are you a little chemically-altered right now?

[Laughs]

A little bit. I'm not gonna tell them. Don't tell them.

They can't know. Come on, we gotta get inside.

Should I go in there? It'll be fine?

Yeah, it's gonna be totally fine.

We gotta support, you're gonna be great and you gotta tell me about what Frank said.

Mmm. I don't want to talk about Frank.

[Grunts] He's...

You know, just... I just... I'm a mute.

Okay, Holly Hunter, I can tell you about my woes instead.

It might cheer you up.

Okay.

What are you doing back here?

It's nice... nothing.

Stop.

Be nice.

♪ ♪

Hello, boys.

Hey, you look incredible.

Oh, thank you.

You're welcome.

You guys ready to peri-peri your minds out?

Let's get peri-peri'd.

Let's do it.

Where is everyone?

Well, it's still early.

Yes, thank you. Exactly exactly.

Nobody good goes to eat until like 10:30 at night.

Hey. It looks really good in here.

Thank you.

Yeah.

Hey, buddy. How you doing?

Hey.

Did you make up with Frank yet?

Uh, no actually. He's done. It's over.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

He just kicked me out on the street, but...

sh1t.

It's okay.

I'm fine. I'm fine.

Really?

Yeah. I'm single now.

So I'm gonna come and feel your boobies.

Sit down.

Let's sit. Oh, good.

Another gay man in my future, good.

Thank you. I'm glad you guys are here.

How do you feel?

I'm kind of losing my sh1t.

Why?

Nobody's here.

It's still early. People don't eat till later.

It's really early.

Have you guys got a Xanax or something?

No no.

Seriously, I'm like having palpitations.

Just breathe.

People are gonna come.

If you could just remind me to breathe, that would be awesome.

You like it?

What is going on?

Dom!

Some people looking for you.

Gentlemen.

So thrilled to see you.

Thank you for coming.

Dom.

It looks wonderful in here.

Oh, thank you.

Where's Lynn?

Oh, he'll be here I think.

[Chuckles]

Doris, would you show these fine gentlemen to their table?

Yes, of course.

Right this way please.

Great to see you.

Yeah, you too.

Welcome.

Hey.

I don't know. Richie's never acted like this before.

It's a little weird. Dom says he thinks that maybe he's just upset and he needs to cool off...

Maybe it's over.

What?

I don't mean to hurt your feelings, I mean, but have you considered maybe...

I hope it's not over. I really like him.

Well, why? Why do you like him?

Why do I like him?

Yeah, what do you like about him?

I don't know. He's just really sweet.

He doesn't have a cynical bone in his body.

He's genuine, you know?

He just is who he is. I love that.

Plus he's f*cking hot.

I mean...

Hello.

I just want to lick his armpits all day long.

But it's more than that though.

I think he's really you know, a great...

Why don't you drink a little bit more water actually?

Put the wine down.

All right.

Throw that back.

[Slurps]

[Cellphone chimes]

[Glass rings]

Stop doing that.

Is Kevin texting you "how's it going?" Why is he texting...

I'd rather not talk about Kevin right now.

Hi. Doris, hi.

Hello. Good evening.

We're late, sorry.

No, no problem.

Wow. The place looks just...

Hey.

Hi.

Glad you could make it.

Of course, yeah.

You know, we were kind of running around doing stuff. We're late.

Yeah. I told him uber would have been easier than trying to find parking around here, but he wouldn't listen to me.

Lynn's been gushing about your food all day.

I'm very excited.

Really, gushing? It sounds messy.

[All chuckle]

Lynn, why have you been gushing all over this poor guy.

[Chuckles]

Oh, there they are. There they are.

So shall we?

Yes, here.

Follow me. This way please.

Hey, guys.

It was nice meeting you.

You too.

You're late.

Sorry we're late.

Hey, hello.

Thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

[Chattering]

Why are these plates going out like this?

I said one potato, the chickpeas and then the garnish is meant to go...

We miscalculated.

It's fine.

We can put half a potato per plate.

We had like a hundred sacks of potatoes.

We got plenty. Can you please get him out of my kitchen?

Okay. Are we having a potato crisis?


What's happening?

What's going on? Are you okay?

Yeah, nothing. It's going pretty well out there.

It is, yeah.

And Lynn's here.

I know.

Did you see that slab of hotness that was with him?

He's not that hot. He's kind of smarmy, I think.

Oh really? Oh my God.

I wouldn't mind if he sat on my face.

Really?

I mean, I want to sit on his face is what I mean.

Well, you should... would you just go back to your post, please?

Sorry. I'm in trouble.

[Sighs]

He gave you like an actual kiss?

Yes, it was an actual kiss.

Why don't you drink this?

Wow, you're so mother hen.

Just bottoms up, okay?

Mmm. Mm.

Did he like French kiss you?

Like with tongue and everything?

Did you just say "French kiss"? Really?

Is that what the kids are calling it?

Maybe in fourth grade.

Hey, can I bum a smoke? Do you mind?

What, you're a smoker now?

Okay. Don't change the subject, all right?

You want to have a thing with Kevin.

I do not want to have a thing with Kevin.

You totally want to have a thing with Kevin.

I do not want to have a thing...

Come on, come on.

Come on, you've been feenin' after the brit since the day you met him.

I have been doing no such thing.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

At least tell me he's a good kisser.

I... don't know if he's a good kisser.

He jumped me in the bathroom.

It was like two seconds long.

He was very tongue forward.

I should be suing him for harassment, anyway.

He's my fricking boss.

Oh, that's true. That's true.

Yeah yeah, we could do like a big class-action suit and get all Norma Rae on his ass.

Take all his game money.

All right, no one's suing anyone.

Why don't you just suck on those ice cubes or something?

Okay.

Give me this.

Hey.

Are you having fun?

Sure.

Sure. Kept you buzzing around all night, huh?

Yes yes. Definitely.

I'm spreading my pollen all over the place.

Uh, the flowers look gorgeous.

They're all so classy. Very classy.

Well, thank you.

No, thank you.

Um, and as you can see, he listened to you.

He's been up front for most of the night, you know, mingling about.

He can be a little hard-headed, but he's no dummy.

He knows what he's doing.

Yeah.

I trust his instincts.

Oh God, you should say that to him.

He would have really liked to hear that today.

He's... he's a little...

He's... your words of wisdom would have been very nice.

Things seem to be going well, so.

Dom's worth it.

Pardon me?

He's just...

He's worth it.

♪ ♪

Can I have my old room back?

What?

Like can we just go back to the good old days before all the boyfriends?

Um... for real?

I don't know. I have to think about that.

Come on, Rose.

Don't you miss "Golden Girl" marathon Saturdays?

Oh yeah. Of course I miss "Golden Girl" Saturdays.

No, it's not a "no," I just...

We gotta talk about it.

[Cellphone buzzes]

Oh God. It's Kevin again.

Just answer that sh1t, man.

I'm not gonna answer. He would have texted if it was about work.

You gotta deal with your sh1t, Norma Rae.

What are you doing?

Hi. [Clears throat]

Yeah. No, I'm fine.

What's up?

Yeah, I don't know were Owen keeps those.

I know where Owen keeps...

[Chuckles]

No no no. That's on the other server.

What?

Yeah. Yeah, no. We're just finishing here, so that's fine.

No no no. No no.

No, really. I don't mind at all.

It's great, yeah. I'll see you in a few.

Okay. Bye.

Look what you did. Now I gotta go into work.

It's good, man. You gotta stick it to the man.

Put that away. It's mine.

No!

Are you sure?

Yeah. Of course.

You taking off?

Yeah, unfortunately I gotta go into work.

What?

Yo, this "pan de nata" was so good.

It's good, right?

And so was the chicken.

It was such a good night.

I know.

I'm so proud of you.

I think people liked it.

There's so many people here. It was awesome.

I know.

I'm gonna text you later.

Bye. "Ciao".

Bye.

You still doing okay?

Splendid. Thanks to you, buddy.

[Chuckles]

Come here. I'm proud of you.

[Beeps]

♪ ♪

Hi.

Hi.

How was your thing?

It was good, I think. I'll get you those files.

Do you want a beer? I got us some drinks.

No, I'm good. Let's just get this done, yeah?

I think actually I...

Sort of got it.

What do you mean?

Well, I got it sorted. I did it all.

Okay. Then what am I doing here?

Well, I wanted to talk to you about what happened.

Oh my God. Please, I told you.

It's completely fine.

What?

Do you how much effort it takes to be around you every day?

Effort?

Mm-hmm.

It takes all of my willpower not to lunge and kiss the f*cking sh1t out of you.

And I can't seem to stop...

Thinking about you, and it's becoming a real f*cking problem.

You have a boyfriend.

Yeah.

You know what? I think I'm just gonna...

No, can you just... Go.

No, please.

Don't just... no, just...

Don't go just yet.

What are you doing?

Just stay. Just... this is...

[Belt clinking]

[Unzipping]

Hold on.

[Moaning]

[Breathing heavily]

Are you sure you want me to?

Huh?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

All right?

You okay?

Yeah.

Ohh. [Grunts]

f*ck.

That's good.

Oh my God. [Grunts]

[Grunting]

♪ ♪

So now what, huh?

Um...

I don't know, Patrick.

[Exhales]

Thanks, guys.

You nailed it.

I knew you would.

Thanks.

Ready?

Well, then...

Good night.

Thanks.

Okay.

Sorry, Lynn, could I just... See you for a moment?

Now?

Yeah, just a quick word.

Um... Matthew, give me a sec.

Yeah yeah. I'll be outside.

Yes?

Well...

I have friends waiting, so...

No, you have one friend.

Dom, he's just a friend.

But that doesn't mean I should make him wait.

No no.

[Sighs]

Listen, I know the reason you were hands-off tonight is because...

I was kind of an asshole yesterday.

I just wanted to give you...

I didn't want the night to end without having the chance to... to...

[Sighs]

I think I need to apologize to you.

No need.

Well, I don't know how we're leaving things.

And so I'm wondering if we could just consider the way I acted kind of a learning curve, and maybe we could keep doing this together?

Pop-ups?

Yeah.

I don't know, who knows?

Maybe something more permanent.

You know, I... I just feel like tonight should be the end of our...

Working relationship.

I mean, that's...

I just think that's for the best.

And now it's my turn to be the creepy stalker guy.

[Chuckles, inhales deeply]

I thought you said you didn't want to talk to me ever again.

I didn't say that.

Look, Patrick, I just want to say something to you.

I don't think I can really...

No, please, let me just... Let me just say this.

Okay.

When I feel disrespected, especially by someone that I care about, it just does something to me, okay?

Um, my pride is something that I'm working through.

It makes me see things all twisted, and I just had to go and shake it off.

Richie...

No.

I know that I'm extra sensitive about where I'm from, and that's my own thing.

And you have your own issues about it.

I know you think you don't, but you do.

Please don't say that.

What? It's true.

Look...

I just...

I think we took things a little bit too fast.

You rushed everything. [Scoffs]

And I'm not gonna lie, part of it was my fault.

But...

I just, you know...

I liked you so f*cking much.

I like you too.

[Sighs]

Pato, I am this close to falling in love with you.

But I'm not gonna do that to myself if you're not ready.

And I don't think you're ready.

[Sniffles]

[Chuckles]

[Snoring]

[Clicks]

[Dorothy, on laptop] Blanche, what are you doing lining shelves on a Friday night?

I'm working off all my excess sexual energy.

[Laugh track plays]

Why don't we just hook you up to the toaster and make pop-tarts?

[Laugh track plays]

Don't make fun, Dorothy.

This is the fifth Friday night in a row I haven't had a date.

Oh honey, you're just in a little slump.

I've never been in one before.

Well, it feels like hell.

Dorothy, how do you go through this for years at a stretch?

[Laugh track plays]

I have compassionate friends around me.