01x04 - New Amsterdam

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Mad Men". Aired: July 2007 to May 2015.*
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A drama about one of New York's most prestigious ad agencies at the beginning of the 1960s, focusing on one of the firm's most talented ad executives, Don.
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01x04 - New Amsterdam

Post by bunniefuu »

H- How fast were you going when Mr. Adams jumped from the car?

75?

And...

And where was that?

L- In your driveway?

H- How far had Mr.

Adams gotten in the lesson?

B- Backing out?

It's not Lenny Bruce, but it's good.

This is better.

It's funny.

This guy used to be an accountant.

Did you know that?

Really?

He's not anymore, is he?

Your wife is here, Mr. Campbell.

Thank you, Hildy.

Lunch date.

Good idea.

You married folks.

Must be nice to spend some time together.

Hello, lovely.

You can do better than that.

Trudy, you know the fellas: Ken, Paul, and Harry, of course.

You'll notice only men coming out of there.

I know you all work so hard.

How's Jennifer?

Good.

Swell, actually, considering she's still at the phone company.

Nothing I can do.

That's not true.

You could give her a baby.

You'll all in on it together.

Nice to see you all again.

Do we have a lunch date?

Because Hildy, she can show you the book.

No, but I'm taking you away.

Trudy, I don't think taking you to lunch is part of my job.

Do you have something today?

No.

I thought you'd be happy to see me.

I called Hildy and asked if you were free.

It'll only take a minute, I promise.

I'm sorry.

It's great.

Where are we going?

It's a surprise.

Ah, Don, I'd like you to meet my wife, Trudy Campbell.

Don Draper.

Nice to meet you.

Congratulations.

You're a very lucky girl.

I know.

Most of my friends can't find a good man.

Believe me.

I'm the lucky one.

Yes, you are.

He's essential to the process around here.

I think we're almost as happy to have him as you are.

Oh, I don't think that's possible.

Well, maybe you're right.

Nice to meet you.

He's so nice.

Not at all like what I imagined.

1,500 square feet.

Two nice bedrooms.

I don't know if that includes that maid's room.

Have to be a pretty small maid.

It's on the market for 32, but Elaine, the realtor, says we can get it for 30.

Lovely, you know that I want to give you everything.

We don't have to pay for the whole thing at once.

We can get a mortgage.

Trudy, I make $75 a week.

Now, I know you're not good at math, but that's $3,500 a year.

You'll make more.

Eventually.

But if we put 10% down, that's an entire year's salary.

Sweetheart, we're not in this alone.

We're a young couple that needs a little help.

Did you see the sink in the master bathroom?

It's the same one they have in The Pierre.

Bill it all to Menken's, Fred.

The girl knows where I keep the accounts.

Hello.

Mr. Draper.

Didn't expect to see you back here.

Well, we're, uh, screening a television commercial.

It'll probably look better when it's breaking up Bonanza.

His work is wonderful.

He's perfect for Menken's.

So he keeps telling me.

Well, I'll let you see Miss Menken out.

How are you?

I'm fine.

My family is fine.

The weather has been spectacular.

Rachel, listen...

What are you doing?

I don't know.

I don't want it to be like this.

Yes, well...

we both know how we'd like it to be.

Can we at least have lunch sometime?

I really can't see a reason for that.

"Church bells rang out, "and the air was filled with flying birds.

"What a joyous parade it was back at the palace.

No king could command anything finer. " The end.

The end.

Again?

Daddy will see you in the morning.

Helen, come on.

I know you're in there.

Damn it!

Helen!

Open the door!

Excuse me, Miss.

I know you can hear me.

Miss?

Look, can I use your phone?

I'm her husband.

I'm supposed to see my kids, and I know she's in there.

I just called from the gas station.

No.

I'm sorry.

Are you serious?

I'm sure you are who you say you are, but I don't let strange men into my home.

Come on.

Can I come in?

Of course.

I'm really sorry.

I'm so embarrassed.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Yes, you do.

I was at the window.

Did you let him in?

Yes.

He's not a bad man.

Do you want some coffee?

It's a joke, really.

Dan hardly saw the kids at all when we were married.

He works in Manhattan.

Life insurance.

Now, all of a sudden, he can't live without them.

Of course, if he does die, I'm set.

I'm joking.

What happened?

I'll tell you exactly.

He had a lot of friends in the city.

There was poker and tennis, drinks at the River Club.

Turned out none of them were men.

Oh, I'm...

I'm sorry.

I really just meant tonight what happened.

Please, I figure I might as well say it.

That's what you've all been guessing anyway, right?

We haven't all been doing anything.

Okay.

The strangest part of it is that I think he's angrier at me than I am at him.

Of course my father got a lawyer, an army buddy who just hammered the hell out of him.

I've always loved that house.

Hello.

He has to go right upstairs and have complete quiet for a while.

He works so hard.

I should get back.

My kids are asleep.

Boat's in the water.

Your cousin Sara had her baby.

Named it after your Uncle Skip.

I think that's nice.

Everything's all ready in the trunks.

We do hope you and Trudy will be making it out to the house this summer.

We'll try, but I'm not sure I'll be able to take the time off from work.

Work?

Ha.

I still don't understand what you do.

I'd hate for you to miss the blackberries.

Run into you at the club, you're working.

At a restaurant, you're working.

Taking people out to dinner, wining and whoring.

No job for a white man.

She's made such a nice addition to the table.

So nice and appreciative.

There's a lot more to it than that.

Advertising.

Really?

See, if someone were to tell me there's a lot more to the law, I'd believe him.

I can't explain how business works to you.

Trudy found an apartment that she likes.

Did she?

Whereabouts?

83rd and Park.

Very nice.

Are you sure you want to be that far uptown?

It's not that far, Dad.

It falls off after 79th.

No, darling.

They fall off after 86th.

It's a very nice area.

It is.

And, well...

it's actually kind of expensive, so we're going to need help with the down payment.

Really?

Yes.

No, I don't think that's a good idea.

And why is that?

I just don't think it's a good idea.

You thought it was a good idea to help Bud when he hit that girl on her bike in Montauk last summer.

What did that cost?

I presume it's your profession that is responsible for this lapse in your manners.

I'll pay you back.

It's not about the money, Peter.

You know that.

Why is it so hard for you people to give me anything?

We gave you everything.

We gave you your name.

And what have you done with it?

Did you have a nice visit?

They're very keen on us coming out to Fisher's Island this summer.

Can they help with the apartment?

I didn't bring it up.

My dad's been having some health problems.

Oh, sweetheart.

What's wrong with him?

Nobody knows.

Walter, how's it going?

Never have much luck, unless I'm playing against Campbell here.

Well, he's known for losing gracefully.

You know our art director, Salvatore Romano.

Did you have a good time in the city last night?

When I come into town, I like to do my business and go home.

Unwind with the Psalms.

No man should have to live out of a suitcase.

So what do you fellows have for me?

Well, we take for granted the things we need the most: Water, oil, electricity... steel.

I was thinking about the last time you were here, looking out this window at this incredible city and saying...

"It's all steel. " New York City: Brought to you by Bethlehem Steel.

The city of Pittsburgh, brought to you by Bethlehem Steel.

The city of Chicago, Detroit, St.

Louis.

Full-page ads in targeted markets: Newspapers, trade publications.

Throw in a few billboards so your employees can brag to their girlfriends.

They're kind of plain, aren't they?

Reminds me of those WPA ads before the w*r.

Walter, you've been doing this long enough.

We can throw this artwork away in a minute.

But the sentiment, the idea, it's so basic, you feel like you already know it.

You just haven't thought of it lately.

Cities are made of steel.

Bethlehem Steel.

I might be wrong, but these feel like ads for cities.

You're making our company look like a middleman for another product.

Well, would you prefer an I-beam on a plate with a pat of butter on it?

No need to get cute, Don.

Just making a point.

Steel is not something that you can buy at the supermarket.

But it is a commodity.

Walter, I'm surprised.

I believe this is fairly close to what we had talked about.

We talked about a national strategy that would involve the virtues of this essential commodity.

I believe it was more specific.

Don, Walter has expressed himself.

Now, Walter, if this does not meet your expectations, I'm sure Don can find something that does, right, Don?

I hate to be a pain in the ass, but if they didn't just lay there so flat.

I don't know.

Maybe it's because I'm not from a city.

They just... bother me.

Look, if we can persuade you to stay in town another 24 hours...

back at the St. Regis, of course...

it would give us a chance to come up with something with more impact.

Get you tickets to a Broadway show.

There's a new one: Uh, Bye Bye Birdie.

I don't like birds, either.

Well, something else, then.

Pete, I think Sal can show Mr. Veith out.

Walt.

Sorry about that.

They are good drawings.

No, the WPA was a very respected style.

20 years ago.

What the hell was that?

Come on, Don.

That's not the first time someone's been unhappy.

Give it a haircut.

He's a second-time guy anyway.

I could feel that.

And I could feel he was sentences away.

I'm that kind of guy.

He didn't like the idea.

Someone hadn't prepared him to like the idea, an idea he was extremely enthusiastic about three months ago.

I'm sorry I didn't lower his expectations enough.

You do your job.

Take him sailing.

Get him in a bathing suit.

Leave the ideas to me.

I have ideas.

I'm sure you do.

Sterling Cooper has more failed artists and intellectuals than the Third Reich.

You know what?

I have good ideas.

In fact, I used to carry around a notebook and pen just to keep track.

Direct marketing.

I thought of that.

Turned out it already existed, but I arrived at it independently.

And then I come to this place, and you people tell me I'm good with people, which is strange because I'd never heard that before.

Draper residence.

Betty?

Helen Bishop.

Are you busy?

Well... no, I'm just finishing up dinner.

Of course.

Listen, this may be truly rude, but I was wondering.

I'm supposed to be stuffing envelopes at Kennedy Headquarters tonight, and my sitter just cancelled, and I hate to back out because, well, you know, New York State is so important.

I didn't know that.

Well, anyway, I was wondering if you could come watch the kids for a few hours.

Right now?

You know what?

I shouldn't have asked.

Well, let me just get dinner on the table.

I guess Don can watch the kids.

Really?

Gosh, that would be wonderful.

Take your time.

Put that lemonade into the floor show.

That's a swell ideal But how could we do that?

Oh, you're a lifesaver, truly.

I can't tell you how much I appreciate this.

Hiroshima, I know.

Cleaning lady and babysitter are one.

Oh, stop.

It's charming.

That's beautiful, Glen.

Except he can wake the baby.

Glen, stop that now.

You remember Mrs. Draper?

She's going to take care of you while I'm gone.

No ironing.

Ironing?

I give him 5 cents a piece.

He loves doing it, Oh, there you are.

I swear to God, I am so exhausted when I get home from the jewelry store that I just kick these off, and I never know where they end up.

You, Glen Bishop, in bed after The Real McCoys.

No discussions.

You look very nice.

They keep the place poorly lit.

I guess there'll be a lot of nice men there.

Yes.

I guess so, although it's mostly women.

Have you seen the candidate?

On the news.

He's handsome.

But I'm not sure who we're voting for.

Well, I'll bring you back some literature.

I'll be back before 10, I promise.

Glen.

You got to get that Lux soap campaign over to Sterling Cooper.

Janet Leigh and Natalie Wood...

now, there's a day at the office.

Is that an orange?

I'm telling you, you boys, you've got it made.

Martini lunches, gorgeous women parading through.

In my next life, I'm coming back as an ad man.

Well, there's slightly more to it than that.

Yeah?

Well, I'd keep that to yourself.

I met his boss yesterday.

You should have heard the nice things he said.

He's not my boss.

Well, isn't that nice?

To be appreciated for what you do?

We have some great news.

Already?

Honestly, you two.

It's not that.

We found an apartment.

Oh.

Well, that's exciting, too.

Yes, well, unfortunately, it's a bit out of our price range right now.

I've been looking in the neighborhood, and it seems very well priced to me: 32, but the realtor says we can get it for 30.

- Around here?

- 83rd, but...

- How many rooms?

- Five: Two bedrooms, two baths, a terrace.

I don't know.

I'd have to look at it first.

Oh, thank you.

Sir...

I'll take Tom or Dad, you got me?

Tom, it's very generous for you to even consider it, but I think we'd rather wait.

For what?

Start your life already.

You're gonna be a rich bastard on your own someday, and waiting's a bunch of bullshit.

- Tomcat.

- It is.

Your confidence is really...

well, it's swell.

But honestly, I'm not sure it's a good idea.

I am.

Pete, this is an investment for me, in you.

And my jellybean over here, of course.

Oh, thank you.

You're gonna love it.

We'll be so happy there.

I knew they'd help us.

I know you did.

Oh, come on.

You can't possibly be angry with me.

I'm just not sure taking that kind of money is a good idea.

He's not paying for the whole thing.

It's still a lot of money, and I'm not sure what it means.

It means we get the apartment.

Do they get to tell us where to put the furniture?

They're not like that.

You would have taken money from your parents.

That's different.

Why?

Because that's my money.

I'll get it eventually.

So this is my money.

Sweetheart, he wants to help.

It makes him feel good.

Well, what about me?

Well, what about me?

You always get what you want, don't you?

I got you.

That's all I really wanted.

Excuse me.

Can we turn up Park?

I need to meet a client downtown.

Hush.

It'll only take a sec.

The Armory.

When are they gonna tear that dinosaur down?

I'll be right back.

I'm in here.

Glen, I said get out.

Young man, what is wrong with you?

This room is occupied.

What do you have to say for yourself?

Glen, look at me.

That was very bad.

You know better than to walk in on someone like that.

That room is private, extremely private.

Well, that's all I'm trying to say.

Now look at me.

Don't you think you owe me an apology?


Well?

I'm sorry.

Well, good.

That's not the way to behave, okay?

Now...

It's all right.

I'm not angry anymore.

You're pretty.

Well, thank you, dear.

Really pretty.

That's sweet of you to say.

How old are you?

Well, I'm the same age as your mother.

How old is your mother?

She's 32.

I'm 28.

Your hair is so beautiful.

You look like a princess.

Well, I don't know about that.

Can I have some?

What?

Can I have some of your hair?

Glen, no.

Just a little piece?

Glen.

You won't even miss it.

Now off to bed with you.

And no radio.

Evening, gentlemen.

Walter, I'd like you to meet my cousins Charlotte and Wendy.

Ladies, it's a pleasure.

We were hoping you were Pete's friends.

You must be the man of steel.

Will you look at that?

You could lose a nickel in those dimples.

I thought your cousin Wendy was a redhead.

No, that's my cousin Doris.

She wasn't available this evening.

Well, I think we can make do with this branch of the family.

I'm glad you decided to stay over.

So am I.

Hey, bottle of champagne for the table and another round of these, plus one.

You know, I had some thoughts about your campaign today.

Did you?

Well, I was trying to express the essentialness of steel, and I thought, Bethlehem Steel: The backbone of America.

What do you think?

Unbelievable.

Did Draper tell you to try and sneak this one by me?

No.

I was just...

Campbell, get off the clock.

We have two lovely ladies here.

The only backbone I'm interested in now is right here.

So, tell me, Wendy, what do you do when you're not lighting up rooms with your smile?

Well, I'm an actress, and I take some classes at Hunter.

Do you?

I would have thought you slept all day and bathed in milk.

How was it?

It was nice.

Very quiet.

Oh.

In case you're interested.

Oh.

Thank you.

I'll be sure to look at it.

I can't thank you enough.

I hope I can return the favor sometime.

Oh, please, don't even think about it.

Looks pretty familiar.

Well, I wanted to maintain our original strategy, but I think the wordplay achieves what you're looking for: The idea that from the acorn...

that is, Bethlehem Steel...

comes America's great cities.

I know this isn't the idea you want to sell me, so don't sell it so damn well.

Excuse me?

The backbone idea.

Campbell pitched it to me last night.

I like it.

What backbone idea?

Bethlehem Steel: The backbone of America.

Wasn't that it?

Oh, right.

It's concise, strong, and frankly, I like that you were so enthusiastic about it you couldn't wait to tell me.

Thanks again, boys.

Pleasure to make you happy, Walt.

Hope your visit to New York was productive.

I'm warming to the place.

Nice work.

I told you I had ideas.

Yes, you did.

Good one.

Enjoy it.

You know what I think?

I think I did something good, and you got the compliment for it.

Listen, Pete, I need you to go get a cardboard box...

and put your things in it.

Okay?

You picked the wrong time to buy an apartment.

H- How far has Mr. Adams gotten in the lesson?

B- Backing out?

Everybody out.

Now!

Uh, did he cover starting the car?

And the other way to stop.

Remember Pete Campbell's last day?

It's today.

What happened?

While I was breaking my neck trying to fix the hash he made yesterday, he was at the St. Regis pitching copy.

His copy.

That little sh*t.

It was hard to see her all alone like that...

supporting herself with that sad little job at the jewelry store.

Frozen food.

I mean, I know she gets some kind of help, but still, she looks so exhausted.

She tries to put on a brave face.

Honestly, I think she's jealous of me.

I've seen it before.

I was in a sorority.

I mean, seeing happy families all around.

But I don't know what I can do.

I can't just disappear.

I live there.

Of course, my real concern is those children.

I mean, the baby won't know the difference, but that poor little boy.

The person taking care of him isn't giving him what he needs.

You know?

Gentlemen, please.

You really love that thing.

You were cute back then.

Pete Campbell.

On his way out.

Sorry to hear that.

Can't be avoided, I'm afraid.

I wish I could agree with that.

He's a junior account executive who brought his own idea to a client in a bar.

There are rules.

There are other rules.

What's the problem?

New York City is a marvelous machine filled with a mesh of levers and gears and springs, like a fine watch wound tight.

Always ticking.

Sounds more like a b*mb.

How much do you know about Pete's family?

Nothing, except they put out a mediocre product.

His mother is Dorothy Dykeman Campbell.

The Dykemans owned pretty much everything north of 125th Street, which I don't know how good your geography is, but that's a fair chunk of the island.

So they're rich.

So what?

Well, no.

Uh, his grandfather dropped it all in '29.

Panicked.

Some people have no confidence in this country.

What's your concern, then?

Well, I don't want Dorothy Dykeman Campbell standing on the dock at Fisher's Island this summer talking about how badly Sterling Cooper treated her son.

I don't think any of us want that.

We lose him, we lose our entree to Buckley, DKE, the Maidstone Club, the Century Club, Dartmouth...

Gracie Mansion sometimes.

It's a marquee issue for us.

See my point?

Absolutely.

He's more valuable to the agency than I am.

Don't fool yourself.

There's a Pete Campbell at every agency out there.

Well, let's get one of the other ones.

You're going to need a stronger stomach if you're going to be back in the kitchen seeing how the sausage is made.

Thought it was a big watch.

You handle the words.

You know how much we want you here with us.

No doubt about that.

Don's a big boy, Bert.

Aren't you, Don?

Well, thank you, sir.

There you go.

I'm glad we're all better now.

What you did is totally unacceptable.

I realize that.

I want you to be very clear about this.

You were fired.

I wanted you out.

Cooper wanted you out.

And you would be if it weren't for this man.

He thought you deserved another chance.

That's right.

He fought for you.

I don't know what to say.

Say nothing.

You're here because of Don Draper's largesse.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

Now, I know that your generation went to college instead of serving, so I'll illuminate you: This man is your commanding officer.

You live and die in his shadow.

Understood?

I won't let you down, Don.

Jesus, Campbell.

Don't ever say that.

I bet daily friendship with that bottle attracts more people to advertising than any salary you can dream of.

It's why I got in.

So enjoy it.

I'm doing my best here.

Oh, you're not.

You don't know how to drink, your whole generation.

You drink for the wrong reasons.

My generation, we drink because it's good.

Because it feels better than unbuttoning your collar.

Because we deserve it.

We drink because it's what men do.

What about shaky hands?

I see a lot of that, too, with you boys.

No joke.

Your kind with your gloomy thoughts and your worries, you're all busy licking some imaginary wound.

Not all imaginary.

Yeah, boo-hoo.

Maybe I'm not as comfortable being powerless as you are.

Pardon?

You know, you shouldn't compete with Pete Campbell.

I'm not.

Yeah.

You are.

Not at a personal level, but for the world.

I don't know.

Maybe every generation thinks the next one is the end of it all.

I bet there are people in the Bible walking around complaining about kids today.

Kids today, they have no one to look up to...

because they're looking up to us.

Of course, if you're not going to have live-in help, that back room can be used for any number of things.

I don't think we'll be having live-in help just yet, do you, sweetheart?

No, I think we'll be managing on our own for now.

Oh, I'm so glad you could come.

I'd like you to meet Mrs. Clifford Lyman.

She'll be one of your new neighbors, and she's on the co-op board.

Of course you know these two.

Where's the nursery at?

Thank you, Tom.

I don't want to hear that again.

Mrs. Lyman, Trudy Campbell.

So nice to meet you.

Well, aren't you darling?

The two of you.

A pleasure.

Now, I know I shouldn't ask, but I have to.

Your mother-in-law was just telling me that your great-great-grandfather was a farmer with Isaac Roosevelt?

Is that right?

Um, yes.

That's true.

That was Nicholas Dykeman, right?

On his mother's side.

Can you imagine orchards on 204th Street?

He's buried at the Church of the Intercession.

Oh, my goodness.

Wait until I tell my husband there's going to be a Dykeman living in the building.

He'll be so thrilled.

Sweetheart, tell Mrs. Lyman the story about your great-great aunt getting in that fight with the British soldier and the Hessian.

You tell it, dear.

You tell it so much better than I do.

Well, I think it was his great-great aunt, or great-great-great...

I'm not sure...

but it was before the Revolutionary w*r, and the Dykemans owned a large tract of land just north of Central Park.

Of course, it wasn't called Central Park back then, but...
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