04x41 - Phineas and Ferb: Star Wars

umm.. Can? Can you do it faster?

Faster?
Yeah - You sure?
Yeah - Funny if possible. Oh Faster Ok. Umm

Alright Uh

No no no no. What?
Forget the Funny. Yeah just go faster.

Alright.

Bum Bum bum!
haha. Jeff "Swampy" Marsh: (laughs) Sounds creepy like that. Thanks
That's good, I like it. Thanks. Yeah, it was capitalized.

PK582 I'm gonna need you to run these numbers again.
I took a third out of budget already.
Order's from the top. There's nothing I can do.

STOP right there!

Oh uh... It's work related.

There he is!

Captain! The Rebel is escaping!
Go after him!

Office Stormtrooper 3: Whoa, what the heck?
Stormtrooper 3: I'm slipping! I'm slipping!
Office Stormtrooper 4: No no no! Save save save!

We received you transmission. So do you have the death star plans?
Agent P you never cease to...

Your Highness! An Imperial Star Destroyer has tracked our position.

♪Phineas: You can look, but you're never gonna find A better place to be

Than this little slice of heaven tucked between
The Jundland Wastes and the big Dune Sea.♪

We can surf through the canyons or train a pack of dewbacks,
Build a giant hamster habitat for womp rats,♪

Or fire up our solar-powered sandcastle-making machine:
Backup: We're on Tatooine.♪

Phineas: Yeah, we're livin' like kings out here—
We got a two-sun summer the whole darn year,♪

Cruisin' Beggar's Canyon in our T-16,
Or just sittin' on a rock eatin' blue ice cream...♪

Backup: Blue ice cream.
Phineas: 'Cause we're on Tatooine.♪

Ferb: Awwww...
We got two big suns, count 'em, one and two,♪
Phineas: And there's two Flynn-Fletcher bois:
Ferb: Me and you!

Well, we're brothers! We're step! No, we don't share a gene,
But we'll always be together here on Tatooine!♪

Phineas: Jammin' with the Modal Nodes, racing turbo dust bikes,
Tradin' with the Jawas,♪
Trickin' out a droid or soupin' up the barge
For a trip 'round Anchorhead Tower.

We can stop along the way and startle Tusken Raiders
And still be home in time to fix the vaporators.♪

I think you know exactly what we mean,
Backup: 'Cause we love Tatooine.♪

Phineas: Yeah, we're livin' like kings out here—
We got a two-sun summer the whole darn year,♪

Cruisin' Beggar's Canyon in our T-16, ♪
Or just sittin' on a rock eatin' blue ice cream. (Chorus: We love Tatooine).

I may be wearin' my heart on my sleeve,
But I can't understand why anyone would want to leave.♪

We know our civic pride may sound a tad extreme,
But we're so happy here, we tend to overstate this theme...♪

Phineas and backup: Overstate this theme!
Phineas: Cuz we love Tatooine!♪

Backup: Oh, we love it! Oh, we love it here on Tatooine!
Phineas: We love Tatooine!♪

Hey Luke!
Phineas! Ferb! What's Up Guys?
Ferb? Check this out!

Luke: Pod-racing engines? How'd you hook these up?
We just picked up some power converters at Tosche station.
Nice!

Do you need help with your moisture evaporators?
We can shrink it up like ours.
I wish. But Uncle Owen wants to do things the old fashion way.

Even the droids he buys are used.
Hey Treadwell! Well catch ya later Luke. We're gonna mosey on homr for lunch.

Wow! When they mosey, they mosey.
What is.. Is that a Star Destroyer?

Finally! Some real rebel busting. This is why I joined the Empire in the first place.
I'm so excited I can hardly contain myself!

I told you to go before the raid. That is not what I meant. But now that you mentioned it, ...
Alright, lock it up. We've got rebels to bust!

Woah woah woah, where do you think you're going?
Uhh space battle over that way?
Certainly not! You know your mission: to find socks for Lord Vader

Yes sir.
SOCKS!! This is a total waste of my potential!
Not me. This is about where I peak.

Agent P, I need you to make sure this R2 unit goes to Obi Wan Kenobi on Tatooine.
But first, I need to record a video message.

Be a dear and stand over by the bulk head, you're kinda in my shot.

So what kinda socks do you think he wants?
Uh Black?
I'm just sayin' everything the guy owns is black! You think maybe?

What? Oh there's somebody doing something over there.
Oh yeah. It's busting time!
Oh Commander!

Huh! we are never going to get those socks are we?
Hey! I found a pair of socks!

Where? Right here!
Oww! Don't be a baby! you're wearing Armor!

But it is plastic!
Commander Commander! There's a rebel recording something in to a droid!

Ooh! By chance is this droid delivering socks of any kind?
Well, no.
Then it's none of your concern! Is it? Back on sock detail!

Hey I'm an argyle man
Huh, I would not think that from looking at you.
Hey! Where'd they go?
Dame's just ran off, but the droids are over there.

Oh no! I'm going to regret this.

There goes another one. Hold your fire. There's no life forms.
It must of short circuited. [Yawn] Coffee?
Yeah! Let's get some of that Sith Roast!

They got away! We've got to follow them! Comeon!
We'll take the other escape pod! Umm Candace?
What!?

♪Socks Socks Socks Sock Socks Socks ♪
[The Imperial March (Darth Vader's Theme)]

Look! we catch those two droids we'll get promoted off of sock detail!
Let's drift!

Baljeet: Technically, we will not be drifting. More like violent ejection,
plummeting through the atmosphere and crashing onto the planet's surface.

Mmm! That's good coffee! Did you know this is decaff?
Huh! I culd not tell!

♪Fully operational Death Star!♪ How Do you like that Norm?
A beautiful invention floating out here in space and do you think I get any credit for it?

Your invention sir?
Yeah I designed it to be a nutcracker! Look, Look at this.

See? It works just fine!
But the Empire took my idea and made it so big it's completely impractical!

A walnut would be totally obliterrated.
The universe is cruel and unjust.
Well when they see my new invention, they'll be signing a different tune.

All I need is to get my hands on a little bit of Force to get it up and running.
Now where am I gonna find some extra Force.
The Force surrounds us.

It penetrates us! It binds the galaxy a...
Yeah I've seen the bumper sticker.

No more adventures! I'm not going that way!

Ah Tatooine.
Ok my busting insticts are telling me that the droids went that way.
Now comeon!

Actually, I joined the Empire by accident. I was trying to sign up for a physics camp.
Physics Camp?! Yeah you're better off. Hey Candace why did you join the Empire?

Don't you remember anything from orientation?
Rebels are cruel heartless sub humans who are messing up the galaxy.
And I am all about Law and Order!

♪ Ever since I was young you know I hated decention
Among my peer group it caused a whole lot of tension♪

♪While the other kids were slouching I would stand at attention
And I've always looked so good in white♪

♪ Now I'm a bad mama jama and I rock a mean helmet
If I see a rebellion then you know I'm gonna quell it♪

♪I'm a certified full blown armour wearin' zealot
And it feels so good to know I'm always right♪

♪You can see exotic worlds across the galaxy
In the Empire♪
♪(In the Empire)

You can be all that they want you to be
You get a 401K and your meals are free♪

♪ In the Empire
(In the Empire)♪

♪ In the Empire
(In the Empire)♪

♪ I don't know but I've been told
The rebels need to be controlled ♪

♪ We'll round them up and put 'em all in stocks
But first we gotta get Darth Vader's socks♪

♪ It's so not fair! I mean why am I still on sock detail when Gladis from accounting
got promoted to commander and she doesn't even know how to hold a blaster no i mean really she failed that part of the exam four times she held it backwards and upside down but no she a secound cousin to some midlevel Darth and so she gets a promotion what about me if they would just open their eyes they would see I've got everything takes I could be the stormiest storm trooper ever♪

You Feelin' better?
Yeah thanks

♪ You can see exotic worlds across the galaxy
In the Empire
(In the Empire) ♪

♪ You can be all that they want you to be
You can march to the beat of conformity ♪

♪ In the Empire ♪
(In the Empire) ♪

♪ In the Empire
(In the Empire) ♪

♪ In the Empire
(In the Empire)
In the Empire ♪

Look sir, droids
No. This is a bath tub stopper. TK90210 what are you doing here?

Well we followed some droids that ejected in the...
Ba ba ba bap the droids and the missing Death Star plans are none of your concern

Death Star plans?
Never you mind. You go to Mos Eisley, I'm sure you can find socks for
Lord Vader there.
Yes Sir

Look sir a magic flute!
No that's a stick

Hi Mom, Hi Dad
Hello boys, you're just in time for Lunch!
So what's on the list?

Another day filled with big plans?
Herd all the Nerfs into Beggar's Canyon
Teach the Starlax to brush his teeth and giving a Bantha a shower.
That's awfully ambitious!

Just trying to make the most of each and every summer day!
Hey! We stopped by and saw Luke!
Ooh. Let me guess, was he staring whistfully at the horizon?

Lawrence!
What? Everyone knows that boy would rather be somewhere else! What about you two?
The crops are so far ahead, would you rather spend they rest of the summer
at swim camp on Naboo?

Sounds fun but we'll pass.
Well how bout ski camp on Hoth? Don't you boys want to see the rest of the galaxy?
Not really, we got everything we want right here on Tatooine!

Sand, womp rats, brothers and banthas.
Why would anyone want to leave?

Wait till they discover there's no girls on this planet!
Lawrence!

Take these two over to the garage will you? I want them cleaned up before dinner.
But I was going to the Toesche station to pick up some power converters.
You can waste time with your friends when your chores are done.
Now come on get to it.

Well come on Red Let's Go!

Uncle Owen!
Yeah?
This R2 unit has a bad motivator. Look!
Hey what are you trying to push on us?!

What about that one?
What about that blue one? We'll take that one.

Okay let's go.
Now don't yoou forget this!
Why I should stick my neck out for you is quite beyond my capacity.

Norm bring all my gear down to my Lair!
You mean the recycling compartment?
IT'S A LAIR!

Ooh! What do you know a moving sidewalk!
Ooh Darth Vader hey hey uh... I know that guy.
It's Darth Vader. Hey hey wait up! Wait up!

Hey look! Eh, I'm Darthenshmirtz! (trips) I'm not sure if you remember me, the Doof Star,
the little nutcracker thing. And then you sorta stole my plans. (trips again) Anyway,
I gotta new invention,

and it's gonna knock your socks off! (trips again) I'm wondering if you could, uh, spare
a little Force. I thought maybe you had a little extra lying around— (Bumps into a couple
of Stormtroopers) Okay, uh, good talk.

Hey! Master Luke took off your restraining bolts now quit complaining!
Now I'm taking another oil bath and I don't want to be disturbed!
Aah!

Wow That Bantha took a lot longer to clean that I thought it would!
But we better get home!

Woah!

Woah Little Fella! Sorry about that!
Say what's a droid like you doing out here in the Judland Waste?

Oh cool! A Movie!
Help Me Obi Wan Kenobi, you're my only hope.

Oh she must mean Ben Kenobi. Hey We were just there.
We have Jedi lessons with him every Tuesday. He lives right at the edge of the Dune Sea
Do you want a ride?

Okay, suit yourself. And remember, Sand people travel single file to hide their numbers.
Oh he probaly already knows

Ah! Agent P our sources tell us that the R2 unit is safely in the posession of Obi Wan Kenobi.
You always come through for us. Great Work! Now take a well deserved rest.

Agent P, I've got your next mission. You need to get to the Death Star immediately!
Darthenshmirtz is working a new inator.
We need you to stop him before he can finish building it. Good Luck.

Phineas: Okay, Mom! See ya later!
Linda: (offscreen) Don't forget your two-sun sunscreen.
Phineas: Way ahead of ya, Mom! Hey, what's this? "Death Star plans"?

Wait, I bet it belongs to that R2 unit that we sent to Ben Kenobi's house.
I wonder if he's still there.
Ferb: No. He is on his way to Mos Eisley.

Phineas: Oh, wow! Can you sense that with the Force?
Ferb: No, I can see them. They're right over there.
You're right, Ferb. And Luke's with them! Inside a—

Tusken Raider: (growls)
Phineas: Whoa! Oh, you got me!
Ferb: (speaks Tusken and plays with the puppet)

Blatto: Phineas and Ferb! My best customers!
Phineas: Hey, Blatto, we're trying to find an R2 unit and give him back this data disc. Hey!
Blatto: Let's take a look at it.

Phineas: Wow! It's an Imperial battle station the size of a moon! And according to these
schematics, it seems to be designed specifically to destroy entire planets!
Whoa, I-I never imagined the Empire would go that far!

Huh, you're right, Ferb. One proton torpedo in that small exhaust port and the whole thing
goes blammo! Blatto: Uh, it's like it's got a self-destruct button.
What kind of idiot would design that?

Darthenshmirtz: Oh, why can't I master this?

Phineas: Wait, if the Rebels have this information, they might stand a chance against this thing.
A small one-man fighter could penetrate the outer defense, fly along that trench,
and get to the exhaust port. Blatto: Hey, spoiler alert!!

Phineas: That droid must be part of the Rebel Alliance!
We've gotta get this disc back to him!

Baljeet: Candace, did you get the socks?
Candace: Mission accomplished.
Buford: I gotta hoagie!

Baljeet: Are those the stolen Death Star plans we are not supposed to be looking for?
Candace: I don't believe it! Hey, you with the Death Star plans, you guys are so busted!
Phineas: Uh-oh! Let's get outta here!

Buford: And they're lost in the crowd.
Candace: Not on my watch! Let's go!
Phineas: Hey, look! There's the droid!

Candace: You two, stop right there! Buford!
Buford: Sorry, my bad!

Random Guy: My watermelon!
Phineas: There's the droid! Let's get over there!
Stormtrooper 5: Stop that ship! Blast 'im!

Han: Chewie, get us outta here!
Chewbacca: (roars)
Phineas: Maybe we came at a bad time.

Stormtrooper 6: Oh, crud, this is going to mean nothing but paperwork.
Phineas: If we don't get these plans to that R2 droid, entire planets could be destroyed.
C'mon, we gotta find a pilot and follow that ship.

Cantina MC: Alright, Figrin D'an and the Modal Nodes!
Not a bad set, guys. Only one death and one dismemberment. Not bad for a Wednesday.
Ponda Baba: (speaks Aqualish)
Cornelius Evazan: I don't like him either.

Cantina MC: Alright, let's give 'er a big cantina welcome, folks, Vanessa the Twi'lek.
Phineas: Um, we're looking for a pilot.
Bartender: Over there.

Nurse: Someone said he shot first, but I coulda sworn it was the other guy.

Bartender: Nope. There.

Vanessa: ♪ I'd get out of here just as soon as I'm able ♪
Wookiee: (growls happily)
Vanessa: ♪ But my hyperdrive's on the fritz ♪

♪ Just today, the mynocks chewed my power cables ♪
♪ And my life's one big sarlacc pit ♪

♪ And I'm feelin' so low ♪
Isabella: Oh, great. What do you farm boys want?

Phineas: I'm Phineas and this is my brother, Ferb. We understand you're a pretty good pilot.
Isabella: For a price.

Phineas: Well, we have a very important disc we need to get to someone who just blasted
out of Docking Bay 94. Isabella: I know whose ship that is.
Phineas: Whose?

Isabella: Han Solo.
Vanessa: ♪ So low... ♪
Isabella: Solo's been a thorn in my side for years.

My ship, the Centennial Chihuahua, was on pace to finish the Kessel Run in eleven parsecs,
and that nerf-herder cut me off!

Vanessa: ♪ I'm feelin' so low ♪
Isabella: Everybody loves Solo! Twelve parsecs! If I ever hear his name again, I'll just—
Vanessa: ♪ So low, so low, so low, so low... ♪
♪ So low, so low... ♪

Isabella: Would you two excuse me?
Yeah, we should probably get going.

Vanessa: Well!

Isabella: Here's my ship, the Centennial Chihuahua.
Phineas: Why'd you call it the Chihuahua?
Isabella: It's personal.

Phineas: Seems weird you'd call it something you didn't wanna be asked about.
Isabella: You're right. It was a call for attention.
Candace: There they are!

Phineas: Whoa! Well, looks like we got it!
Isabella: Move it! We gotta get outta here!
Candace: Fire the cannon!

Baljeet: I think the barrel end slides in here.
Buford: But then the scope is on the bottom! That's not right!
Isabella: Hold on, this is gonna be rough!

Candace: Give me that! You're goin' down!
Phineas: Uh-oh!
Isabella: I see it!

Buford: And you thought we were gonna die in space.
Candace: Move move move!

Candace grunts.

Phineas: Gosh, Ferb. Our planet looks so small from here.
Isabella: First time in space?
Phineas: Well, yeah, now that you mentioned it.

Isabella: Yeah, your planet's over here.
Phineas: Oh, that makes much more sense. Mom and Dad always did want us to see
the galaxy, but I don't think that this is what they had in mind.
Isabella: You might want to buckle up. I'm makin' the jump to hyperspace

Phineas: A little more warning would be nice.

C.O.: Ahem. I grow tired of asking this but, please, tell me you have the socks.
Candace: Yes!

Buford? With my compliments, sir.
C.O.: Excellent, now report to the Death Star for reassignment.
I'll deliver these to Lord Vader myself.

Candace: Finally! Now we're gonna see some action!
C.O.: Whoa whoa whoa! You're not riding in here! Uh, this shuttle's full.
You can ride back to the Death Star on that bus pod.
Buford: What a piece of junk!

Darthenshmirtz: Wait, that's it! I solved my Force problem! I can extract it from
Vader's garbage. It...It says right here, see? You can find anything on the Internet.
Hey, check it out, Norm-3PO. According to this real estate website,

my time share on Alderaan is worth, like, 10 times more than I paid for it six years ago!
Oh, I knew the value would go up! It's just, it's such a peaceful place to..

Wait, what? What's this? The value is totally dropping!! Zero?!?!

Isabella: (angrily) Hey, whatcha doin'?!
Phineas: Isabella, did you know that you have T-27 thermal couplings up here?
Isabella: Get down from there!
Phineas: Ferb and I can reroute their current to double up your power supply.

Isabella: Just keep your paws off my ship! Reroute thermal couplings.
Phineas: I wonder what our family and friends are doing back on Tatooine.
It feels a little strange to be so far from them. But at least we're making new friends.

Like you, Isabella.
Isabella: This is not a friendship, it's a spaceship! So don't invade mine!
We're coming out of hyperspace! Buckle up, ladies!
Phineas: Whadaya think, Ferb? A girl like her and a guy like me?

Ferb: Sure. Why not?

Isabella: As promised, the Millennium Falcon.
I should be able to catch him before he gets to that small moon.

Phineas: That's no moon. It's the Death Star! Isabella, turn the ship around!
Isabella: What have you guys gotten me into?!
We're caught in a tractor beam! My engines can't pull us free!

Looks like we're gonna have to shoot our way out! I'm powering up the turrets!
Phineas: There are alternatives to fighting.

Isabella: I should've known getting this close to Solo was a bad idea!
Hurry it up back there!
Phineas: We've modified the deflector shield with a cloaking mechanism. Give it a try.
Isabella: Well, this had better work or you two are floating home!

Phineas: I don't think we can float all the way home.
I mean, we wouldn't survive 15 seconds in the cold vacuum of spa—
Isabella: It's a figure of speech!

Phineas: It worked! It even smells like donuts in here! Nice touch, Ferb.
Isabella: Okay, let's see if it fools them. Uh, Dockin' Bay control,
ya got us cott in a track-ta beam heeyuh! Ya guys want donuts or not?

Imperial Officer Jeff: Oh, shoot! Disengaging tractor beam.
Deliveries are in Docking Bay 427. You're clear to land. So, donuts?
Imperial Officer Dan: Does Darth Vader wear a funny hat?

Imperial Officer Jeff: Dude!
Imperial Officer Dan: Oh, relax, he can't hear us all the way down— (Gets Force Choked)
Imperial Officer Jeff: Oh, no! I didn't!
Imperial Officer Dan: Ha ha! Gotcha!

Candace: Can you believe this? Making us ride the bus pod?
They better give us a Rebel-fighting job this time and not just running some more errands.
Baljeet: Uh-oh!

Candace: I mean, how hard is it to deliver socks?
Baljeet: Uh, Candace?
Candace: Yes?

Baljeet: I believe Buford requires your attention.
Candace: Oh, what is it, Buford?

Huh. Uh, Buford, I'm gonna ask you a question and I want you to
think very hard before you answer

Buford: Thinking is always hard.
Candace: I know. Here's the thing. If we have Darth Vader's socks,
what exactly did we give the commander?
Buford: Uhhhhh....

Vader: I find your lack of socks disturbing.

Stormtrooper 6: Hello? Are you open yet?
Stormtrooper 7: Hope they have the old-fashioned. Those are my favorites.

Isabella: I can't believe that worked!
Phineas: I feel guilty, though. Maybe we should get them some donuts.
Isabella: WOULD YOU STAY FOCUSED?!

Phineas: Huh. Sorry.
Isabella: Okay, let's find Solo's ship and the droid, and then I'm outta here!
Phineas: Well, they've landed in Docking Bay 327, and we're in Docking Bay 427.

That's not so bad. What is it, Ferb? What's with the hand?
Ferb: I feel something. A presence I have not felt since...
Phineas: Perry!

Hey, old buddy!
Isabella: Who is this?
Phineas: This is Perry the Platypus. He used to be our pet until we found out he was
secretly an agent for the Rebellion.

We felt a little betrayed and hurt at first, but bygones be bygones. Now we're good, right?

Phineas: So you're probably on a mission right now, huh? Hey, so are we!
Heh. Oh, uh, this is our pilot, Isabella.
Phineas: So, uh, good luck.

Phineas: He looks good.
Isabella: Ugh! Let's get this over with!

Darthenshmirtz: There ought to be enough residual Force in Vader's garbage here to
power it up for, y'know at least one shot.
Norm-3PO: One man's trash is another man's bad idea.

Darthenshmirtz: Just put the garbage in the chute, Mr. Wisendroider!
Well, well, well, it's Perry the Rebelpus!

Oh, sorry about the door. I...I put in a work order,
but the guy's not gonna get down here 'til, like, Thursday. So, y'know. Ah, ah, look,
Norm, you see? You put a big red "X" on the floor, people will stand there!

Human nature! Or, in this case, platypus nature.

Phineas: What's wrong, Ferb? You got your hand up again.
Ferb: Perry is in trouble.
Phineas: Oh no! We must go help him.

Ferb: No. You must go get that disc to the Rebels. We cannot risk our mission.
Phineas: Split up? Really?
Isabella: Just do what you need to do fast and meet us at the Falcon!

Phineas: May the Force be with you and all that stuff.
Phineas: Come on! We gotta find that droid!

Norm-3PO: There. It's just like art!
Darthenshmirtz: Yeah, nothin' like a frozen platypus to tie a room together!
Now, allow me to tell you why I created my latest inator.

Darthenshmirtz: ♪ You see, the Force with me is weak ♪
♪ I've never been that hip or chic, ♪
♪ People treat me like a freak ♪
♪ Sometimes they even boo and hiss. ♪

♪ Let me tell you, even though ♪
♪ My midi-chlorians are low, ♪
♪ I'll be the Death Star's CEO ♪
♪ When they get a load of this... ♪

♪ It's a Sith-inator ♪
♪ It's a really cool machine. ♪
♪ My evil will be greater ♪
♪ Than Darth Vader's ever been. ♪

♪ You ask all those haters ♪
♪ From Naboo to Tatooine, ♪
♪ They'll say, "Wow! That Darthenshmirtz is mean!" ♪

♪ When this is operational, ♪
♪ I'll zap myself, then bam! ♪
♪ The Force will be so strong with me, ♪
♪ They'll all know who I am! ♪

♪ And all those bureaucrats ♪
♪ That used to point and jeer and joke ♪
♪ If I put my fingers just like this ♪
♪ They're gonna start to choke. ♪

♪ Moff Tarkin will respect me, ♪
♪ Give me medals and a raise. ♪
♪ With all my newfound Sith-iness, ♪
♪ I'll set the Force ablaze! ♪

♪ The Emperor who used to only ♪
♪ Greet me with a yawn, ♪
♪ He now will say, "I'm blown away!" ♪
♪ Much like Alderaan. ♪

♪ It's a Sith-inator ♪
♪ It's a really cool machine. ♪
♪ My evil will be greater ♪
♪ Than Darth Vader's ever been. ♪

♪ You ask all those haters ♪
♪ From Naboo to Tatooine, ♪
♪ They'll say, "Wow! That Darthenshmirtz is mean!" ♪

♪ It's my Sith-inator, ♪
♪ It's got evil moving parts, ♪
♪ I'm a Sith creator ♪
♪ And my evil's off the charts! ♪

♪ And my portrait will be placed ♪
♪ On all the grandest evil heeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaarrrrrths... ♪
♪ And I'll no longer be the lowest of the Darths! ♪

♪ I'll no longer be the lowest ♪
♪ The fastest, not the slowest, ♪
♪ The yes-est, not the no-est, ♪

♪ And you'll all be eating crow-est, ♪
♪ I'll no longer be the lowest of the Daaaaaaaaaaaarths! ♪
Darth Vader can kiss my bantha!

Norm-3PO: Very good, sir! That was better than rehearsal!
Darthenshmirtz: Alright, stay close to your comlinks, ladies, and, if all goes well,
I'll have a victory number in the fourth act.

So, like I said,
I'm going to make myself super-evil with my Sith-inator here, but first,
I'm gonna shoot you just to make sure it's safe and, uh, y'know,

I don't...die or fry myself and have to wear one of those masks like Vader,
'cuz that would not be a good look for me

Darthenshmirtz: Eh, y'know, plus, if it works, you can join me on the Dark Side.
We can be Sith buddies! Whadaya think? Huh?
Ferb: (yells in pain)

Darthenshmirtz: Hold on. Wait a minute. Wait...what...who let a kid in here?!
Hey, buddy, you okay? (to Perry) Yeah, he's gonna have a headache, but with any luck,
he's gonna be so evil when he gets on his feet.

Oh, great, I-I-I used up all the Force on this guy. Hey, Norm, grab the trash can.
We gotta go refuel. Wait right here, Perry the Rebelpus.
We'll be right back to turn you to the Dark Side, too, and then you, me, and...this kid in the cloak, I guess, can be be the Three Sith-keteers!


Norm-3PO: Who can I be, sir?
Darthenshmirtz: You can be the horse. C'mon, let's go.
We gotta get some more of that super-Force-y-Vader trash.
I know just where to look.

Han: We're all right now...
Candace: TK-90210 reporting for duty, sir!
Imperial Officer 5: Just a minute.

Han: Uh, how are you?
Imperial Officer 6: Oh, tell him I'm doing great.

Imperial Officer 5: We're sending a squad in.
Han: Uh, negative, negative. We have a reactor leak here, now, uh, no.
Uh, give us a few minutes to lock it down. Uh, large leak. Very dangerous.

Imperial Officer 5: Who is this? What's your operating number?
Imperial Officer 6: Aw, I was just getting into that conversation!
Imperial Officer 5: All of you, directly go to Level Five, Detention Block AA-23!

Buford: Yeah!! Get them!
Baljeet: Buford, wait!
Candace: Finally, some real action!

Imperial Officer 5: Ah-dadadadadda! I need you to stay here and guard this post!
Candace: But but but...
Imperial Officer 5: That's an order!
Candace: Oh, bantha droppings!

Phineas: ...and no matter what, we always did everything together.
Isabella: Are you done?
Phineas: Yep.
Isabella: Good. Then let's get going!

Candace: Serious trooper. Happy trooper! Enigmatic trooper. Sad trooper...
Phineas: It's down here around this corner, and... Uh-oh!

Candace: Hey, you're the ones with the stolen Death Star plans!
Phineas: Run!
Candace: Hey, that's coming out of my salary!

Han: This garbage chute is a really wonderful idea!
What an incredible smell you've discovered!

Darthenshmirtz: Come here, boy, come here, that's it. Come on. That's it.
Now, now, whatta ya got for Papa there? Ooh, is that Darth Vader's inhaler? Nice!
Now we're talkin'! And what's this? This looks like a perfectly good banha-cheese hoagie.

Well, it's not good anymore. It's been underwater. Wow! According to this,
it's reeking with Dark Force! Vader must've touched it. Put it in here.
What else have you got for me? That's not trash, dummy, that's a guy!

Just put him back, I've got enough.
Man, you can lead a dianoga to garbage but you can't make him think.

Darthenshmirtz: Uh-uh-uh! Don't forget to flush!
Luke: (offscreen) The walls are moving!
Leia: (offscreen) Don't just stand there! Try and brace it with something!

Darthenshmirtz: Man, someone needs to oil that thing.
Chewbacca: (growls offscreen)
Darthenshmirtz: Okay, come on, Norm-3PO, let's go make some Sith happen.

Darthenshmirtz: Oh, hey, they fixed the door! Must've been a cancellation somewhere.
I'm gonna go check on the Sith-inator. You go see if that kid's evil yet.
Norm-3PO: Where did we leave him? Behind this box?

Darthenshmirtz: Norm, what the heck are you standing around for?
I thought I told you... Whoa whoa whoa whoa!!

Oh, my spleen.

Darthenshmirtz: Hey, get away from that! Perry the Rebelpus, you stay away from my inator!
Don't make me—

No wait! Wait wait! Whooo!!!

Imperial Officer 7: You know, I'm thinking about getting a saxophone.
Imperial Officer Wayne: Huh, good for you.

Darthenshmirtz: (To Perry) I'd like to see you try that again!
Imperial Officer 7: Uh, should we report that?
Imperial Officer Wayne: I'm not losing my place in line.

Candace: Hey, get back here, you two!

Candace: Aaaaaah!

Help! Help! Help me! I'm slipping!! (grunts)
Phineas: Oh no! I-I have to help her!
Isabella: Don't be a fool!

Candace: (grunts) Aaah!
Phineas: I got you!
Candace: Uh, but...
Phineas: (gasps)

Candace: Why would you save me? You're a Rebel.
Phineas: You were in trouble. I couldn't just leave ya hanging...literally.
Candace: Well... Buford! Watch where you're shooting that thing!

Buford: Seriously! Why don't they put safeties on these blasters?

Buford: Sorry, my bad!
Stormtrooper 8: Hey, don't worry about it! I'm planning on hitting the wall and sliding down
until I catch onto a radio antenna! Oh no! Wait, that's Cloud City I'm thinking of!

Oh, crud!

Candace: But why would he save me?

Isabella: You're either really brave or really stupid!
Well, kid, looks like your luck hasn't run out yet.
Phineas: There's the Falcon and the R2 unit!

It's getting away! But I've gotta get the disc to...
Isabella: Quick! Back to my ship!
Phineas: Wait, what about Ferb? We can't leave without him.

Isabella: If we don't leave now, we'll lose the Falcon.
Phineas: But I can't leave my brother.
Isabella: (indignantly) Tick-tock, tick-tock!

Phineas: Isabella, you've gotta take the disc back to R2. I'll go find Ferb.
Isabella: If I leave, I am not coming back!
Phineas: Fine. Just make sure you deliver the disc to the R2 unit.

sabella: How do you know I won't just go back to Tatooine?
Phineas: (running off) I trust you!
Isabella: Remember that "brave or stupid" thing? I know which one it is!

Phineas: What is that? It looks like it was built by...

Ferb?

Phineas: Cool face paint!

Rebel Officer 1: Oh no!
Rebel Officer 2: What?
Rebel Officer 1: The disc is gone! The one with the thing for blowing up the Death Star!

Rebel Officer 2: Are you kidding me?
Rebel Officer 1: It's supposed to be right here!
Rebel Officer 2: This is not happening! No no! We are so dead!

Rebel Officer 1: Is it right there? Is it on the floor? Maybe it fell out of the flight deck.
Okay. Okay, I know. We'll blame Jar Jar.
R2-D2: (beeps)
Rebel Officer 2: Jar Jar Bi— That's a terrible idea! He retired, like, 20 years ago!

Rebel Officer 1: Hey, it's not like we have a lot of options here.
Rebel Officer 2: Okay, let's do this. You go get a thermal detonator,
and we'll put it right back here on the...
Rebel Officer 1: NO! How is that better than my Jar Jar idea?

Isabella: Yo, tech support. Got something for ya.
Rebel Officer 2: (takes the disc) Oh my gosh! Thank you!
Rebel Officer 1: Yes, thank you! You saved our lives! (chuckles) Whoa,
that was a close one, huh? Hey, where do you think she found it?

Rebel Officer 2: Hey, man, never look a gift tauntaun in the oral cavity.

Darthenshmirtz: Hey, wait wait wait, I can't see!

Alright, someone's getting a lightsabering now! Oh, it's, uh, just a flashlight.
I guess my lightsaber's in the camping supplies.

Ooh, ooh, look, I'm scary—Uch, whatever. Bye!

Phineas: So is there like a face painting booth around here or something?
And where's Perry? Were you able to find him?
Darth Ferb: I found this: the Sith-inator. And I've modified it to create an army of Sith warriors.

Join me on the Dark Side, brother.

Phineas: (laughs) Shut up, Ferb! C'mon, let's get outta here. Isabella already left.
We gotta find the ship so we can get home.

Darth Ferb: The Dark Side is my home now.
Phineas: Whoa, Ferb, what are you doing?

Come on, quit messin' around! Hey, this-this isn't funny. I'm not gonna fight you.
Darth Ferb: If you will not join me,

then I must destroy you.
Phineas: Okay, I can see you're serious.

Ferb, this isn't you! We're brothers!

Phineas: Hey, this is crazy! We-We-We would never try to hurt each other!

Is that the best you got?

Oh, we're allowing modifications, huh? Gimme a sec.

Buford: Hey, Candace, what's up?
Candace: Um, I was just thinking, we're the good guys, right?
Baljeet: Yes, I believe so.

Buford: That's what they told us durin' the brainwashin'.
Baljeet: Orientation, Buford!
Buford: Potato, tomato.

Candace: And Rebels are bad. We know that.
Baljeet: Of course. The Rebels are always the bad guys.
Buford: What about Robin Hood?

Baljeet: That has not happened yet!
Candace: Well, one of the Rebels just saved my life. He could've escaped, but, instead,
he came back to help me.
Buford and Baljeet: Hmmmm...

Candace: And didn't we just blow up a planet?
Baljeet: Hmm, yes, that is sort of difficult to justify...morally.

Darthenshmirtz: (maniacal laughter) You're over there and I'm over here
and never the twain shall meet.
So I guess you're just gonna have to give up.

Oh, I-I see, you're gonna swing across like a monkey-man.

Hoo-hoo-hoo! Me swingy-swingy monkey-man! Go ahead, knock yourself out.
There's no way you got enough cable to reach that.

Oh, I see what you were trying to— Yaaah!

Ow! No no!

Isabella: Well, well, well, Han Solo.
PA Announcer: All flight crews, man your stations.

Gretchen: Hey, look! It's Isabella! Isabella, you've joined the Rebellion?
Isabella: Not by a long shot.
Gretchen: Well, you should. You're a great pilot. We need you,
the odds are stacked against us.

The Empire has everything, a Death Star, highly trained troops, Darth Vader.
And we're just a ragtag bunch of undertrained good-intentioned Rebels.
And to be perfectly honest, Isabella, we're kids.

We are actual children, and they're letting us fly fighters.
That's how hopeless the situation actually is. So, you wanna help us?
Isabella: Strangely, still no.

Porkins: (offscreen) Worst rallying speech ever!
Gretchen: Shut up, Porkins!

Isabella: I'll have one of those.

What happened, Solo? Garbage scow tip over and dumped you here?
Han: What are you doing here, Isabella? Did someone run out of cupcakes?
Isabella: Very funny. So where are you heading?

Han: As far away from here as possible.

Isabella: Yeah. I don't have any reason to stay here either.
Han: I don't owe anything to anybody.

Isabella: I'm not in this to make friends.
Han: Yeah. Obviously.
Isabella: What do you mean by that? I've got friends! I've got plenty of friends!

Han: Yeah? Where are they now?

Isabella: Well...where are yours?
Chewbacca: (growls)
Han: Put a sock in it, fuzzball!
Chewbacca: (whimpers and growls)

Han: (sighs) Maybe you're right. Maybe I do have someplace to be.
See you around, Isabella.

Isabella: (sighs) Eh, the Wookiee is right.

Darthenshmirtz: Ow.

Darthenshmirtz: Ah, it's good to be back.

Hey! You're too late! No stopping me now!

Hey, it's cold in here! Ow! I've got such an ice cream headache!

Darth Ferb: Now you will join me!

Candace: Step away from the Rebel!
Phineas: Don't shoot him! He's my brother!
Candace: Your brother's a Sith warrior?!

Phineas: No. I mean, yes. I mean...it's a recent development.
Wait, why are you helping me? I'm a Rebel!
Candace: I had to. I couldn't just leave you hanging.

Darthenshmirtz: Hey, heads up!

Darthenshmirtz: Hey, watch it!
Candace: Hold it right there, pal! Aaah!

Darthenshmirtz: Hey, you're gonna stretch out the elastic.
Phineas: Ferb! Please stop!

Candace: Now I really wish I'd bought the three-pack!

Darthenshmirtz: Oh, man. I really should have ray-shielded that.
(KABOOM!)

Phineas: (groans) Ferb?

Ferb: (groans)
Phineas: Are you okay?

Phineas: Ferb!

Buford: Found this perfectly good robe lying around. Has one hole, right here.
Hey, look what else I just found! My hoagie!
Baljeet: I would not eat that if I were you.

Candace: C'mon! Let's get off this battle station.
Phineas: But we don't have a ship!
Candace: I know where there's a bus pod.

Phineas: Perry, great work! Hey, don't be a stranger!
Darthenshmirtz: You think maybe you could turn this thing over?
All the blood's rushing to my head.

Phineas: Hey, it's Luke! They must've got the plans!
He should hit that exhaust port no problem.
I mean it's as practically as big as a womp rat!

Yeah, we should probably get outta here.
Candace: Come on! The bus pod is right through here!

Candace: Wait wait wait!
Buford: No no!

Baljeet: Oh no! That was the last ship!
Buford: Yeah, we're toast.
Phineas: Well, if we had to go out, at least it was for something we believe in.

Baljeet: My only regret is that I spent so much time on the wrong side.
Buford: My only regret is that I ate that hoagie.

Phineas: I guess if I have a regret, it's that I never got reunited with my sister.
She left Tatooine when I was just a baby.

(Ding!)
Candace: Phineas?
Phineas: Candace?

Candace: Oh, I can't believe it! You got so big!
Phineas: Candace!
Candace: I didn't even recognize you! Hey, wait a minute, why is this guy hugging us?

Phineas: Oh, this is Ferb. He's our stepbrother.
Candace: Mom remarried? What happened to Dad?
Phineas: (laughs) Funny story actually. He—

Phineas: Wow, that was close! Thanks for coming back to get us, Isabella.
Isabella: Well, that's what friends are for.
Baljeet: Oh, but what about all those innocent baristas and bank tellers
and bowling alley attendants?

Isabella: They're fine. The Firestar Girls got them out earlier.

Everyone on board: We're okay!

Major Hologram: Ah, Agent P, with you stopping Darthenshmirtz,
and the Rebellion destroying the Death Star, this day will be long remembered.
Apparently, there are still copies of the Death Star plans out there somewhere, so

we still might have a teeny problem there, but, heh,
we'll blow up that battle station when we come to it. Hologram out!

Darthenshmirtz: Ha ha! So long, Perry the Platypus! Now I can live to fight in the sequel!

Eh. I probably should have thought this one through better.
I didn't realize the escape pod would be Platypus-sized. Plus, I'm sitting on my keys.

Chewbacca: (growls)
Phineas: The Wookiee is right! Let's party!

Vanessa: All right, boys, let me hear some of that Rebel bass!

♪ We don't often have a cause ♪
♪ For a celebration, ♪
♪ No, we don't always have a reason to smile. ♪

♪ We've been knocked over, stepped on, ♪
♪ Straight-up oppressed, ♪
♪ Our resolve and endurance ♪
♪ Have been put to the test. ♪

♪ We've been under-thumbed, undervalued, ♪
♪ Under arrest, ♪
♪ And we haven't seen the sun for a while. ♪

♪ But the tables have turned, ♪
♪ The momentum has shifted, ♪
♪ Can't you feel the change in the air? ♪

♪ A new hope has returned, ♪
♪ Our spirits are lifted, ♪
♪ Go tell ev'rybody ev'rywhere! ♪
♪ Time to celebrate! ♪

♪ (Oh, oh! Oh, oh!) ♪
♪ Rebel, please, I think you ought to know, ♪
♪ (Oh, oh! Oh, oh!) ♪

♪ If you've been waitin' for a chance to party, ♪
♪ Then Rebel, let's go! ♪
♪ (Rebel, let's go!) ♪

♪ Rebel, let's go! ♪
♪ (Rebel, let's go!) ♪
All the Wookiees in the house go "Grrrrr!"

Chewbacca: (growls)
Isabella: Hey, farm boy.
We're not related, are we?

Phineas: Oh, no, no, no. Not a chance. I only have just the one sister.
Isabella: Good. Mmmmmwah!

Vanessa: ♪ Tell ev'ryone we're back in full force ♪
♪ Time to celebrate! ♪

♪ (Oh, oh! Oh, oh!) ♪
♪ Rebel, please, I think you ought to know, ♪
♪ (Oh, oh! Oh, oh!) ♪

♪ Rebel, let's go! ♪
Porkins: Hey, look, everyone, I'm okay! (crash!)
Gretchen: Way to ruin the moment, Porkins!