02x05 - That's Amore

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("THE WHITE LOTUS" THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

(THEME MUSIC CONCLUDES)

(SEAGULLS SQUAWKING)

(ALBIE DI GRASSO BREATHING HEAVILY)

(LUCIA AND ALBIE MOAN, PANT)

(MOANS)

- Are you gonna come for me?
- (PANTS) Yeah.

- Yeah. (PANTS, MOANS)
- (PANTS, MOANS)

Oh, my G... Oh, my God.

(WAVES CRASHING)

(CELL PHONE VIBRATING)

- (GROANS)
- (CELL PHONE VIBRATING)

- (WHISPERS) Hello?
- TANYA MCQUOID-HUNT: (OVER PHONE) Hey!

The gays invited us to Palermo.

What?

TANYA: We're gonna go on their yacht.

We're gonna spend two
nights at Quentin's palazzo.

He said he might even throw me a party.

You're gonna need to
bring some cute things.

Do you have any cute things?

Uh, yeah, yeah.

You sure?

Mm-hmm. Yeah, actually.

We're leaving right
after breakfast, so...

come on, get over here.

Okay.

Bye.

("AMORE CHE VIENI, AMORE CHE
VAI" BY FRANCO BATTIATO PLAYING)

(SONG CONCLUDES)

ETHAN SPILLER: Harper?

What is this?

You tell me.

Where did you get it from?

I found it yesterday.

Where?

Okay, look, it's not what you think.

I haven't done anything. Okay?

It wasn't me.

It was him. I swear to God.

Uh...

(EXHALES)

He had sex on the couch?

- In here?
- ETHAN: Mm-hmm.

With who?

With these...

with these Italian girls
that we met at the bar.

They were... you know,
they were hookers.

Yeah.

You met two hookers at the bar,

and brought them back to our room,

and Cameron had sex
with them on the couch?

I can't remember 'cause,
like, I was wasted, but...

What were you doing?
Were you just watching?

I was... Honestly, I
was just, like... I mean,

I... I... I was just sitting there.

I... I... I wa... I...
I was going to bed.

They came in, and then...
I mean, I don't know.

I can't remember. I
was really out of it.

And you didn't do anything
with these hookers?

No. I didn't do any of the sex stuff.

I mean, one of them, like, at one point,

one of them tried to kiss me,

but I freaked out, so
nothing happened. I promise.

Okay, look, w... we took Molly...

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

I mean, I know that sounds bad, but...

Yeah, it sounds really f*cking bad.

I was gone for one f*cking night,

and you did Molly with hookers?

- Yeah... But...
- And I come back and find a condom wrapper on the couch?

- What the f*ck?
- Yeah, but, look... I swear to you,

I didn't do anything. Okay?

- I'm not lying.
- You already have lied to me.

No, I have not. When have I lied to you?

- I haven't lied to you.
- Yes, you have!

- When?
- I gave you every chance yesterday to tell me

what happened, and you
f*cking bullshitted me.

Well, I didn't tell
you everything, yeah,

- because...
- To say the least.

He begged me not to tell anyone, okay?

I don't know. I guess I was worried

that if I told you, then
you would talk to Daphne,

and then it would become

- this whole dumb thing.
- That was your worry?

I'm sorry. I f*cked up. Okay?

I should've talked to you. But...

honestly, I kind of think you
should feel good about this.

I mean, I didn't do anything.

All of that was going... Like,
under those circumstances,

- and then I didn't do anything?
- It just...

it sounds insane. But...

okay.

Don't make a bigger deal out
of this than it is. Please.

- Please.
- Okay. Okay.

Okay? I didn't do anything.
I'm not lying to you.

Okay.

You know I don't lie to you.

(FOREBODING MUSIC PLAYING)

Okay.

- ETHAN: Look, I'm sorry.
- HARPER SPILLER: Mm-hmm.

(FOREBODING MUSIC CONTINUES)

- (ZIPPER CLOSES)
- Okay, I'm going to go.

Can I, uh... Can I see you again?

- I, um...
- (MUSIC CONCLUDES)

I have to hang out with
my family today, but...

I don't know, maybe... maybe tonight?

Yes. Yes, of course.

- Okay. All right.
- (CHUCKLES)

Yeah. That was, um... That
was fun. Yeah. It was cool.

- Yeah, cool.
- Yeah.

Um...

Do you...

do you have my money?

Money?

It's , for overnights. Um...

Uh... I'm sorry, for what?

For me.

(EXHALES)

I'm sorry, I thought you knew it.

I... (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) I had no idea.

It's okay.

It's okay, it's um... It's okay.

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) No, I
just... Sorry, I just... I...

I've never done anything like that...

before. So, I just...
I don't know, I just...

- I didn't... I...
- You didn't know.

- You didn't know.
- ALBIE: I didn't know. Yeah.

LUCIA: It's okay. I had fun.

I like you. You're nice.
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

You don't have to pay for this.

No. I mean now, I feel bad.

- So...
- It's just,

there is a man who will
ask me for the money

and, uh, he's crazy, you know?

- Um...
- ALBIE: Okay,

I'm gonna go to the... I'll go to
the bank. I'll get the money from...

- the bank, I'll...
- LUCIA: It's okay. It's okay.

Maybe we can still meet later, or...

You don't want to see
me again. I understand.

- No, no, no. I wanna se...
- I understand.

I wanna see you again.

Sure, I wanna see you again. For sure.

I do like you.

I like you, too.

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

- Great.
- Great. (CLAPS) Okay.

- So... Yeah.
- Uh...

I'm sorry. I thought you knew.

No. (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
It's... It's my fault.

("TU SI 'NA COSA GRANDE"
BY DOMENICO MODUGNO PLAYING)

Arrivederci.

- See you later. Bye.
- (LUCIA CHUCKLES)

TANYA MCQUOID: You know,
I talked to Billy Offer

last night about getting
the marriage annulled.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

How did I not see the signs, Portia?

- (PORTIA SLURPS)
- Do you think I'm oblivious?

No.

TANYA: You know, sometimes, I think...

I should've started
that spa for poor women

with that girl from Maui.

You know, 'cause she
was like a real healer.

The real deal. But you know,

sometimes I think those
healers are a little witchy.

Hm.

Maybe she put a curse on me.

(SONG CONCLUDES)

How was your night? You have fun?

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

I need to go the bank. I need,

- um... I need to get some euros.
- DOMINIC DI GRASSO: Yeah, sure.

I can give you, uh, .

I need more than that.

For what?

For whatever. Something. I
don't know. Does it matter?

I need to go to the bank.

What?

(CHUCKLES)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

(SLURPS)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

(IN ITALIAN)

(IN ITALIAN)

(IN ENGLISH) Daph's pissed at me.
(SIGHS)

- Yeah, I am.
- (MUSIC CONCLUDES)

They had their big
night without us. Uncool.

CAMERON SULLIVAN: Yeah, so,

I booked a car, so we
can head out to Etna.

Check out some of these wineries,

little day-drinking,
little wine-tasting.

Apparently, the wine has, like, a bunch

- of volcanic minerals in it.
- Yeah. Healthy wine.

So, we can get drunk, and
then tomorrow our skin,

and our hair, and our
nails will be glowing.

What do you guys think?

- Huh?
- (DAPHNE SULLIVAN GIGGLES)

CAMERON: E?

Yeah, sure.

If it's good with Harper.

Yeah, yeah, why not? Let's
get drunk. (CLEARS THROAT)

Maybe we can find some
Molly and really rage.

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

- LUCIA: (IN ITALIAN)
- MIA: (IN ITALIAN)

MIA: Hmm.

(INHALES)

(IN ENGLISH) Oh, no.

(IN ITALIAN)

(QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING)

MIA: Scusi!

VALENTINA: (IN ENGLISH) No.

(IN ITALIAN)

VALENTINA: (IN ENGLISH) No.

(IN ITALIAN)

VALENTINA: (IN ENGLISH) No.

(IN ITALIAN)

(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

DOMINIC: (IN ENGLISH) Hi.

- Hi.
- DOMINIC: How are you?

- Well.
- (MUSIC CONCLUDES)

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

Uh, have you been
charging stuff to my room?

Oh, not much. Just...
just little food. Yeah.

- Is it a problem?
- No, no. It's not a problem.

You wanna charge a
little food, that's fine.

- LUCIA: Thank you.
- Uh, maybe, in exchange, um,

you stay away from my son.

Whatever you do, please
do not say anything

to him about, you
know, you and me. Okay?

Have you been going in my father's room?

No.

No?

Just one time. But we took showers.

Do not go in my father's
room. That is not cool.

You wanna hang out here? Uh...

Fine, but we can't create
a situation. Okay? Please.

Okay.

- Buona giornata.
- Buona giornata a te.

(BLOWS KISS)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

(MUSIC CONCLUDES)

- Oh, my God. Hey.
- ALBIE: Hey.

- Hey.
- Oh.

Are you, um... are you leaving?

Uh, we're going to Palermo
for two nights. Yeah.

Um, but then we're coming back. Yeah.

Hey, I just wanted to say,

I'm sorry for yesterday.

I was planning on hanging
out and everything. I just...

you know, couldn't get away, and...

- So...
- No. Yeah, that's fine. Um.

Yeah, I saw that you were... busy.

Yeah, I guess...

Busy. And, um, you seemed

like you got a little bit
busy yourself. (CHUCKLES)

(CHUCKLES) Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, well.

(GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING)

Seriously, though, have
a... have a nice life.

(CHUCKLES) Yeah, I'll try.

(CHUCKLES) And you too.

- Bye, Portia.
- Yeah.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

(BOTH SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)

(VALENTINA CLEARING THROAT)

Ciao.

Ciao, Isabella.

(IN ITALIAN)

(MUSIC CONCLUDES)

Oh. Oh. Grazie.

VALENTINA:

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

- ("VIA DEL CAMPO" BY FABRIZIO DE ANDRÉ PLAYING)
- (CHURCH BELLS TOLLING)

- Ready, honey?
- DAPHNE: Yeah.

(GIGGLES)

(CAMERON AND DAPHNE SMOOCHING)

(SONG CONCLUDES)

(CLEARS THROAT) Guys.
(CLEARS THROAT) Guys.

- Sorry.
- Oh.

So, we will start with our Etna Bianco.

Mm.

It is juicy on the palate,
and it has notes of plums,

and prickly pears. Oh.

- Oh.
- HARPER: Oh. Oh.

A bit more.

- Cheers, party people.
- Cheers.

- ETHAN: Cheers.
- La dolce vita!

(CHUCKLES)

- Cheers.
- (GLASSES CLINK)

What's next?

("OGNI UNO" BY EUGENIO BENNATO PLAYING)

Mm. Yums.

Eh, eh, eh, eh.

(QUENTIN SPEAKING ITALIAN)

(RESPONDS IN ITALIAN)

(IN ENGLISH) Did you
knit your little cap?

(CHUCKLES)

He doesn't understand English.
Or Italian half the time.

The boat is beautiful.

(WHISPERS) But does it go any faster?

(CHUCKLES) Tommaso! Make it go faster!

He's just gonna show
me around downstairs.

(SONG CONCLUDES)

Wow. I think your nephew and Portia

- are really hitting it off.
- Yes.

- TANYA: Wow.
- I think it's nice for him

to have someone of his
own age to play with.

I'm just dying to know. How
did you end up in Sicily?

My father moved here in about .

- TANYA: Oh.
- And then when I was about ,

the silly old sausage d*ed,

leaving me his rather wonderful villa

and its never-ending upkeep.

- And you love it here, right?
- Oh, yes.

- (ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING)
- Sicily can be very seductive.

(CHUCKLES)

Come on. Let me show you the bedrooms.

They're very f*cking posh.

(MUSIC TURNS WHIMSICAL)

Hey, Rocco.

- ROCCO: Si?
- (IN ITALIAN)

VALENTINA:

- (SIGHS)
- Rocco. Prego.

(SIGHS)

(WONDROUS MUSIC PLAYING)

(WATER BURBLING)

(WINE SLOSHING)

(BIRD CHIRPING)

What was your guys' favorite?
I think mine was the Eruzione.

DAPHNE: I liked the one in

I think that glass.
Which one was that, Cam?

I don't remember,
babe. We'll buy a case.

- DAPHNE: Okay.
- I have a question.

- Yeah, what's your question?
- (CHUCKLES)

Have you two ever slept
with the same girl?

- What?
- (CHUCKLES) What?

Just curious.

- Where did that come from?
- Yeah.

In college, come on.

Be honest.

Well, there wasn't exactly
a lot of overlap, you know?

Different dating pools.

- (CHUCKLES)
- HARPER: Really?

You never invited a girl
over to your dorm room?

Played Naked Twister?

- (CAMERON CHUCKLES)
- (CHUCKLES) Naked Twister?

Come on. You guys never had one orgy?

Just tell us!

- DAPHNE: Yeah, Cam...
- No.

- ... did you have orgies?
- No, only in my dreams, honey.

Never a threesome?

- ETHAN: No.
- CAMERON: No, not that I recall.

- Right?
- Cameron would always sleep

with the girls that I liked,
but before I could get to them.

If I ever told him that I liked a girl,

he would swoop in and have
sex with them within a week.

- (GASPS) Oh.
- Cameron. Rude.

You have a bad case of
something called mimetic desire.

- (TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)
- What's that?

If someone with higher status
than you wants something,

it means it's more likely
that you'll want it, too.

You did not have higher status than me.

Not then, maybe.

I mean, I was smarter than you.

Maybe you thought that f*cking women

I had a connection with
would make you smarter.

You guys ever watch each other have sex?

- Oh, my God.
- (CHUCKLES) Me and E?

- Yeah.
- Harper, what is with these questions?

I mean, it was college, right?
We didn't have our own room.

So, probably.

So, I guess old habits die hard, huh?

(SLURPS) Mm. You guys wanna
hit up another winery or what?

DAPHNE: Yeah!

Come on, let's go.

- (WINE GLASS SLAMS)
- (MUSIC CONCLUDES)

("SPIRITUAL" BY FABRIZIO
DE ANDRÉ PLAYING)

QUENTIN: Welcome to Palermo.

You've never seen a
freak show like this.

- TANYA: Hey!
- Hey. (CHUCKLES)

TANYA: Where have you been?

Um, he was just giving
me a tour of the cabin.

This whole time?

Mm-hmm.

You two have been
having sex on the boat.

That's what you've been doing.

No.

I'm jealous.

I'm jealous.

- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- (SONG ENDS)

What happened to your head?

BERT DI GRASSO: I banged it
on a corner of a nightstand

looking for the remote.
It's just a little scratch.

I'll feel better after a martini.

I think I'm gonna eat lunch at the pool.

Why not with us?

Well, that girl's over there.
The girl from last night.

You know, I... I... I don't
know how I feel about you

spending a lot of time
with those girls, Albie.

Why? What's the problem?

(SIGHS)

I think because they're escorts.

How do you know?

(CHUCKLES) Well, because...

ALBIE: Because what?

Because I wasn't born yesterday,
and it's fairly obvious.

(SCOFFS) So what if they are?

I mean, you'll sleep with escorts,

- but then you'll judge them?
- Who says I sleep with escorts?

I'm sure you've both slept with escorts.

Albie, I... I just don't think
your mother would be happy

if she knew I was letting
you run around Sicily

with a couple of escorts.

Mom's not happy because you cheat on her

with whoever you can get your hands on.

And it's pretty hypocritical
that you would judge them.

I'm not judging them. I'm
just looking out for you.

They probably don't wanna be escorts.

They're just poor and
victims of a f*cked-up system.

Women aren't all saints,
Albie. They're just like us.

Have a good lunch. (SCOFFS SOFTLY)

Where you going?

Dad, what is the matter with you?

I... I mean, you almost just...

- Just what?
- DOMINIC: You know what.

I'm trying to smooth things over
with Albie and with everyone,

and that would,

you know... that would
really not be good.

I can't be responsible
for everything I say,

I'm concussed.

- I just hit my head.
- Yeah.

(MISCHIEVOUS MUSIC PLAYING)

- HARPER: Oh, my God. Here, here.
- (DAPHNE GIGGLES)

(CHUCKLES) I like it.

What the f*ck! You told her?

You left a condom wrapper
on the f*cking couch,

and she found it!

- What?
- Yeah!

What was I supposed to
do? She thought it was me.

- HARPER: Are you sure it doesn't...
- I think she still does.

- Oh, sh*t.
- DAPHNE: No. (GIGGLING)

How do you miss that?

I don't f*cking know, all right? I...

- DAPHNE: Cameron!
- Sorry. I...

Coming.

(SIGHS)

(MATTEO SPEAKING ITALIAN)

- PORTIA: (IN ENGLISH) Are you okay?
- TANYA: Wow. Wow. Wow.

JACK: Yeah. Strong as an ox.

I'm so sorry about the bag.

- I tried not to overpack.
- Nah, you're all right. (SIGHS)

It's not a problem.

You got a f*cking dead body in here?

TANYA: Oh, my God.

(OVERLAPPING CHATTER IN ITALIAN)

(IN ENGLISH) My God. Are you kidding me?

Look at that pool.

Hey. I mean, these
are some high-end gays.

(SIGHS)

Oh, it's a good feeling when you realize

that someone has money.

'Cause then you don't have to
worry about them wanting yours.

- Mm. Must be such a relief.
- TANYA: It is. It is.

God, will you look at this?

Oh, my God. Don't steal anything.

QUENTIN: Come in. Come in.

TANYA: Oh, my God.

You must have dumped a
fortune into this place.

- Hey.
- You all right?

QUENTIN: Oh, yes, a little
one. I was hoping to get

some heritage subsidies
from the government,

but they said we had to
open it to the public.

So... that's not going
to happen. (CHUCKLES)

Oh, yeah. You don't
want the public in here.

No. The public are not welcome,

but you are. Come. Sit, sit.

Would you like some tea, some Moscato?

I would like a splash of Moscato.

QUENTIN: Now...

you know, after hearing
the story of your love life,

we decided you were like

a tragic heroine in a Puccini opera.

I told you this.

Yeah, but... (SIGHS)
Is that a compliment?

- Oh, yes.
- TANYA: It is?

QUENTIN: So, we decided
it would be very fitting

while you're here if we
took you to the opera.

And tonight they're going
to show Madame Butterfly,

which will be fantastic.

- Mm.
- QUENTIN: Would you like that?

- Hm?
- BOTH: Hm?

- To the opera!
- All'opera!

The opera? Sounds like a f*cking

- sh*t idea. So, I say...
- (CHUCKLES)

... that we... we ditch the gays,

I can show you around
town. Get us in trouble.

- (CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
- JACK: What do you reckon?

I reckon that sounds great.

- You takin' the piss outta my accent?
- Yeah, maybe a little.

- All right, f*ck these lot. Hm.
- (PORTIA CHUCKLES)

(CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING)

- LUCIA: Yes, yes. Maybe.
- ALBIE: Oh, yeah.

(CHATTING INDISTINCTLY)

- LUCIA: Yeah.
- Oh, I, uh,

I went to the bank.

I have the money.

Did you like last night?

- Very much. Very much so.
- LUCIA: Hmm. So did I.

What about tonight?

Yeah, um...

I... I don't mind paying.

I just... I would feel weird
being part of some situation.

Like, if you're being
exploited by some guy.

Do... do you know...
do you know what I mean?

Yeah.

Yeah, but, I mean, I don't
want money. I like you.

- Yeah?
- Yeah. Very much.

- (GIGGLES)
- Hey!

(PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING)

- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- (SEAGULLS SQUAWKING)

(CHILDREN LAUGHING)

(CHUCKLES)

(MUSIC INTENSIFIES)

VALENTINA: Isabella?

BOTH: (IN ITALIAN)

Ciao, buonasera.

Buonasera.

Ah. E Rocco?

E, Rocco...

VALENTINA: Vai.

(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

(WIND HOWLING)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

- Wow.
- (SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)

That is absolutely incredible.

Wow.

(GIGGLES)

JACK: Can you believe it?

We're finally free, just you and me.

- Do you like arancini?
- Arancini. Yeah, totally.

- Nice.
- What is it?

- It... f*ck's sake.
- (CHUCKLES)

- It's like a rice ball.
- Oh!

- Yeah. (CHUCKLES)
- A rice ball!

I love a good rice ball.

(SNORTS) Bet you do,

- you f*ckin' slag. (CHUCKLES)
- (CHUCKLES)

Well, the best rice balls are down here.

They're the best in the world.

- You're gonna love 'em!
- (GIGGLES)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

- I sit here?
- Yes. Look up.

Look up.

Wow.

(GASPS, WHISPERING) Oh, my gosh.

Hey.

Who's the lady?

Is it the Queen of Sicily?

Yes.

(GASPS)

Psst. Psst.

(MOUTHS)

(MOUTHS)

(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

(MATTEO CLEARS THROAT)

Here we go. (SNIFFS)

(INTENSE OPERA MUSIC PLAYING)

(KISSES)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

Hey, uh, I'm gonna hit the head.
I'll see you guys over there.

- ETHAN: Sure.
- DAPHNE: Okay.

Just... just a second, okay?

- So sorry.
- ALBIE: Okay.

Come on.

You can't be giving me looks
like that in front of my wife.

I don't care. Where is my money?

I know, okay? Just... just relax, okay?

You're gonna get your
money. I've just been busy.

It's , euros.

Thirteen hundred... It's nothing.

Okay? I just need to go to a bank.

- All right? Just... Relax.
- No. Give me your number.

No!

- I want it! I want your number.
- No. Jesus Christ.

I'm here with my wife.
All right? I can't.

And I can't be talking to you.

(MUSIC FADES)

- Hey.
- Hey.

- Sorry. (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
- Um. Who was that?

Um...

He owes me money.

- He hired you?
- Yeah.

ALBIE: And he didn't pay you?

And, um, Alessio is
asking me for the money.

Threatening me and...

Is there anything I can do?

No, no. It's not your problem. Really.

- Okay.
- LUCIA: Yeah.

(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

(SLURPS)

BERT: You can't really be surprised,

- can you?
- By what?

Well, that he's running
around with an escort. (CHEWS)

What do you mean?

You've normalized it for him.

(MUSIC CONCLUDES)

Right, like you normalized it for me.

Oh, I never ran around with hookers.

I don't run around with hookers either.

Dom. Didn't you run around
with that exact hooker?

You gave her the key to my room.

You know the reason I am the
way I am is because of you.

(CHUCKLING) You're blaming me

for your situation? That's rich.

Do you think you were so discrete?

Do you? I mean, how many
nights did I hear Mom

cry herself to sleep? Get real.

Everybody knew, Dad.

- (SCOFFS)
- Everybody knew.

- Everybody knew.
- We had a great marriage.

Oh, my God. You are deluded.

You made her life hell
my entire childhood.

Do you have amnesia?

If I made her life hell,

- why'd she stay with me?
- DOMINIC: I have no idea.

She didn't know any better.
She was a martyr. I don't know.

She loved me.

She was a bitter woman.

And she d*ed a bitter woman,

and she knew about everything
you did. Believe me.

You were just too self-involved
to even notice that.

Yeah, and you know what, I...

(SCOFFS) I don't blame you

for my situation, but
I sure f*cking could.

Because you never...

showed me how to love a woman.

You never... showed
me how to be intimate.

You never showed me
how to put others first.

You always put yourself first.
Always. So I did the same thing.

I loved your mother.

And she loved me.

It's not that simple.

Yes, it is.

- DAPHNE: Cheers.
- HARPER: Cheers.

To volcanos, and all
the threesomes of past,

and... (CHUCKLES) present, and future.

(HARPER AND DAPHNE GIGGLE)

I feel like you sow your
oats when you're young,

and then you just, you know,
you get it out of your system.

I don't know.

- Not sure it works like that.
- I know, but that's the idea.

Well, it's kinda like food, you know?

You... gorge yourself until you're sick.

You swear you'll never eat
another bite, and then...

few days later, you're hungry again.

- (DAPHNE SIGHING)
- So, Harper.

You've grilled me and E
all day. What about you?

(CLICKS TONGUE) What about me?

You ever had a threesome?

- (SCOFFS)
- DAPHNE: Yes.

- Right?
- DAPHNE: Mm-hmm.

- Maybe.
- Really?

With who?

- Uh, with my friend Paola...
- CAMERON: Mmm, Paola?

- Mm-hmm? Oh.
- ... and this guy Oscar.

This was in San Juan.

Were they your cousins or something?

- (CHUCKLES)
- Very funny.

- Yeah.
- Okay, okay. How old were you?

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) Um...

I don't know. I was, um...

I was in college.

Were you a good girl or a bad girl?

- (CHUCKLES)
- I mean, I wasn't...

I wasn't bad, but I had fun...

in college.

- DAPHNE: In college?
- (CAMERON LAUGHS)

DAPHNE: What, not now?

No, I mean it's just hard
to... You know, Ethan...

Ethan loves his p*rn, you know?
So, it's just hard to compete

- with "Slutty intern gets triple banged... "
- (DAPHNE LAUGHS)

"... for not listening to her bosses."

Maybe we should slow down on the wine.

No, let's not slow down.

- Let's keep it going, right?
- Yeah, f*ck it.

- Yeah! Why not?
- Right? Why not?

Ah. Camerieri.

LUCA: Okay.

HARPER: Let's see what you have.
Give it a little twirl. Okay?

- Perfecto.
- (DAPHNE GIGGLES)

- LUCA: It's okay?
- What's your name?

LUCA: Luca.

- Luca.
- LUCA: Yes.

- My name is Harper.
- LUCA: Nice to meet you.

Piacere... (SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)

("PREGHIERA IN GENNAIO" BY
FABRIZIO DE ANDRÉ PLAYING)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

(SLURPS)

(IN ITALIAN)

(MISCHIEVOUS MUSIC PLAYING)

(CLEARS THROAT)

Grazie, Valentina. Grazie mille! Grazie.

Grazie, Valentina.

(SIPS) Grazie! (KISSES, GIGGLES)

Grazie, grazie!

(IN ENGLISH) Let's go.

I've never eaten so fast in my life.

Seriously, you were right.

- That was the...
- (SUCKS FINGER)

... best rice ball I've ever had.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

Palermo's amazing. Seriously,

there's, like, so much
going on all the time.

I think there's, like, uh,
a club somewhere around here.

But, it's a bit early.

They don't really get
going until : A.M. here.

Hm.

- (CHUCKLES)
- WAITER: Hey!

Oh, keep walking, keep walking,

- keep walking.
- (SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)

- PORTIA: Wait, what?
- WAITER: Hey!

- Come on, run, run, run!
- What's happening? (LAUGHS)

- (SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY)
- (SCREAMS, LAUGHS)

Go, go! Get behind that bin there.

PORTIA: Wait, wha... what are we doing?

- Okay, get down. Relax.
- PORTIA: What's that? What...

- You all right?
- PORTIA: Why is he chasing us?

- (LAUGHS, PANTS)
- All right.

All right, we're good.
We're good, we're good.

- (LAUGHS)
- Whoo!

Wait, wait, wait, wait.
What just happened?

(LAUGHS) Well, I forgot my wallet.

- I could've paid.
- Nah.

- PORTIA: Yeah.
- Wouldn't ask you to pay. You're a lady! (CHUCKLES)

How'd you run in them
things anyway? I'm impressed.

(LAUGHS) Ow, yeah. My feet
do really freaking hurt.

- Do they?
- Yes.

It's all right, I can lick
'em better later if you want.

- (CHUCKLES) Will you?
- Give 'em a little massage.

- PORTIA: Yeah? (CHUCKLES)
- You like that? (CHUCKLES)

(OPERA MUSIC RESUMES)

(SINGING IN ITALIAN)

(MOUTHS) Thank you. Thank you.

(APPLAUSE)

(WAVES CRASHING)

- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- Okay. Grazie.

- (CHUCKLES)
- (DAPHNE CHUCKLES)

Hi.

Nice.

- Where'd they go?
- To find cigars.

Mm.

(DAPHNE CLEARS THROAT)

You okay?

I think something happened.

When we were in Noto.

Like what?

(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

I'm sure whatever
happened wasn't a big deal.

And if anything ever
did happen, you just...

do what you have to do to make
yourself feel better about it.

I have this trainer in the city.

Lawrence. He's so handsome.

He has blonde hair and
these, like, big, blue eyes.

(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

He's really funny, too.

I spend more time with
him than Cameron sometimes.

'Cause he's so busy at work.

Such a cutie. Wanna see a pic?

This is just a picture of your kids.

Is it? Whoopsie. (CHUCKLES)

We'll find it later.
Anyway, the point is...

maybe you should get a trainer.

(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

(SIPS)

(MUSIC CONCLUDES)

- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- This is the best gelato

- you can have in Taormina.
- Really?

- Yeah.
- In just Taormina?

Um, no, I mean, in all of Sicily.

- Mm. Well, I would hope so...
- Yeah.

... because it took us,
like, an hour to get it, so...

- (LAUGHS)
- ALESSIO: Lucia!

Oh, no.

I'll be right back. Just...
just stay here, okay?

Okay. Yeah.

(BOTH SPEAKING IN ITALIAN)

Sorry.

Who is that?

Alessio.

Is everything okay?

I just don't want to talk about it.

Okay.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

- (SLURPS)
- Poor Madam Butterfly.

Seppuku.

I can relate. (CHUCKLES)

Gore Vidal, who is a friend...

Actually, he used to sleep
in the room you're staying in.

He once said, "I can
understand companionship.

I can understand bought
sex in the afternoon.

But I cannot understand
the love affair."

(SCOFFS SOFTLY) I'm the same.

You've never been in love?

Ever?

Once, yes.

Before I got wise.

I was young.

- Who was he?
- He was an American, actually.

I was... restless, and I'd
read too much b*at poetry.

And I decided to go bumming
around the American West

in the hopes of
out-scandalizing my father.

(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

And I met this young cowboy in Wyoming.

- Hm.
- And I fell absolutely head over heels for him.

And of course, he was heterosexual

and completely uninterested,

which only added to
the torturous pleasure.

I'd have done anything for him.

(GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING)

And the amazing thing is after
odd years, I still would.

Well, whatever happened to him?

Well, he got old.

Which, though unforgivable,

is not strictly-speaking his fault.

(BOTH CHUCKLE SOFTLY)

No, no.

Other than the cowboy,

love's never been my Achilles heel.

It was always beauty.

Hm. I live for beauty.

I know you do.

I do. (SLURPS) Hm.

I'd also die for beauty. Wouldn't you?

Hm.

A world without beauty...

is not a world I want to live in.

Well...

you couldn't ask for a
more beautiful world...

than this.

Here's to beauty.

To beauty.

(BOTH SLURP)

- You want a f*g?
- (SLURPS) Yes.

(BOTH LAUGH)

Oh, that was a wild night, weren't it?

Can't believe you
almost got me arrested.

Thought I gave zero
fucks, but you give, like,

negative fucks.

- JACK: Is that a problem?
- No.

JACK: Well, you ain't seen nothin' yet.

- I'll be back, yeah?
- PORTIA: You're not coming in?

Oh, I gotta go do something
for my uncle, but...

keep your door unlocked, yeah?

'Kay.

(GIGGLES)

("THAT'S AMORE" PLAYING OVER PIANO)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

♪ In Napoli ♪

♪ Where love is king ♪

♪ When boy meets girl ♪

♪ Here's what they say ♪

(MUSIC TURNS OMINOUS)

- ♪ When the moon hits your eye ♪
- (SINGING BECOMES DISTORTED)

♪ Like a big pizza pie ♪
♪ That's amore ♪

♪ When the world ♪
♪ Seems to shine ♪

♪ Like you've had too much wine ♪
♪ That's amore... ♪

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

- (SINGING RETURNS TO NORMAL)
- ♪ Bells will ring ♪

♪ Ting-a-ling-a-ling ♪
♪ Ting-a-ling-a-ling ♪

♪ And you'll sing "Vita Bella" ♪

♪ Hearts will play ♪

♪ Tippy-tippy-tay ♪
♪ Tippy-tippy-tay ♪

♪ Like a gay tarantella ♪

(PHONE LINE RINGING)

♪ When the stars ♪
♪ Make you drool ♪

♪ Just like pasta e fasule ♪
♪ That's amore... ♪

ABBY: (OVER VOICEMAIL) Hi, this is Abby.

I can't take your call right now,

so leave me a message.

♪ When you walk ♪
♪ Down the street ♪

♪ With a cloud at your feet ♪

♪ You're in love ♪

♪ When you walk in a dream ♪

♪ But you know you're not ♪
♪ Dreaming signore ♪

(BOTH MOAN, PANT)

♪ Scusa mi, scusa mi ♪

♪ But you see ♪
♪ Back in old Napoli ♪

♪ That's amore ♪

- (BOTH PANTING)
- (SONG CONCLUDES)

- (FLAMES ROARING)
- (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

(BIRDS SQUAWKING IN DISTANCE)

(QUENTIN MOANING)

(MEN GRUNTING)

(MAN GRUNTS)

(MEN PANTING)

(MUSIC CONCLUDES)

("LA STAGIONE DEL TUO AMORE"
BY FABRIZIO DE ANDRÉ PLAYING)

(SONG CONCLUDES)