15x10 - Help, I'm Alive

[bunniefuu]

MEREDITH: Voltaire said that the art of medicine

is amusing the patient while nature cures the disease.

So according to one of the greatest

French philosophers of all time,

surgeons aren't really helpers.

- ♪ Black tears on my shirt ♪
- We're more like circus clowns.

- Sorry. Just...
- ♪ Black tears on my freckles ♪

- I know.
- ♪ I been stung by this hurt ♪

But suck it up, because I need your help.

♪ I been stung by the stinging nettle ♪

♪ Someone call, someone call, someone call ♪

But help comes in many forms.

I stopped pulling on my fingers.

- Or...
- ♪ I don't know who I am at all ♪

... no, a-at least now I notice when I'm doing it.

[CHUCKLES] And I've been doing the exercises you showed me.

♪ Someone call, someone call, someone call ♪

I'm really noticing a change.

- Don't try to rush it.
- ♪ I don't know who I am at all ♪

Takes time for the meds to balance out.

Right. But...

♪ Black hole in my heart ♪

... well, for instance, uh, you have a little bit of, um...

- ♪ Black hole in my favorite sweater ♪
- ... I think, maybe yogurt on your, uh, chin.

I've wanted to mention it this whole time, but I didn't, so...

♪ Someone call, someone call, someone call ♪

... I think we're making progress.

And something tells me Voltaire never held an aorta

while a patient's entire blood volume

pulsated between his fingers.

I'd say we are.

♪ Someone call, someone call, someone call ♪

You b*at up the bar with a baseball bat?

[BOTH LAUGH]

- ♪ I don't know who I am at all ♪
- Not exactly sober behavior.

No.

Legendary, but definitely not sober.

- ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
- And, um, my wife has...

♪ Can anyone hear what I'm saying? ♪

She's been diagnosed with something frightening.

Oh, man.

- And you were with Ollie, right?
- Yeah.

So you need a sponsor?

If you'd be willing.

♪ Does anyone hear what I'm saying? ♪

How you doin' with prayer and meditation?

- Uh... I'm not.
- ♪ Someone call, someone call, ♪

Well, how 'bout we start there?

Call me tomorrow.

♪ I don't know who I am at all ♪

♪♪

♪ Someone call, someone call, someone call ♪

♪ I don't know who I am at all ♪

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

[SNIFFS]

Oh! Dr. Bailey.

Just the person I was looking for.

Uh, do you live here now, or do you fly back [CHUCKLING] from Germany on a weekly basis, and if so, why?

Oh.

Well, um...

I mean, as it turns out...

- I am pregnant.
- [GASPS]

With Owen's baby.

And Owen and Amelia Shepherd are back together again, and Amelia's sisters have issues with me.

Rightfully so. It... It's not undramatic.

It's not undramatic to the point of it being comical.

And... And, still, Dr. Bailey, I need a job. I really need a job.

I-I-I need to be occupied with work, and I... I need it badly.

[BREATHES SHARPLY]

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Um, y-you're gonna have to say all of that again to Alex Karev.

[FOOTSTEPS]

[SIGHS]

♪♪

- You're on the board?
- Yeah. I-I'm sorry.

I want to be there when...

No, no, I have a dozen little kids coming to my house in a few hours.

You said you would help.

I don't know anything about superheroes.

Well, you tell Bailey that Uncle Alex is saving lives, that he actually is a superhero.

Yeah, right. That'll definitely work.

Ooh, Dr. Karev, can I walk with you?

Um, yeah, what, do you live here?

Well, it's... it's complicated.

Catherine! You're back.

- How are you feeling?
- How am I feeling?

Why don't you tell me?

Since you seem to be so good at telling everybody everything.

- Catherine, I...
- Save it.

You're fired from my team, Dr. Grey.

And if you value your job at this hospital, I suggest you stay out of my sight until my fury passes.

♪♪

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

- Hey.
- Hey.

You look nice.

Thanks. Cece's funeral.

Yes. How'd that go?

It was awful.

And beautiful.

A lot of her single clients were there.

There will probably be a lot of hookups tonight.

- Fitting.
- Yeah.

How are you doing?

- Did you talk to your mom?
- Uh, yeah.

Yeah, I mean, we all had dinner last night, and we all have a surgery together today, so...

You're doing a surgery?
Catherine's doing a surgery?

A pelvic exenteration that spares the uterus, to be exact.

And the patient's ready for us.

- Mm.
- All right.

WOMAN ON P.A.: Dr. Berjeron to the ICU.

Dr. Berjeron to the ICU.

[DOORS SLIDE OPEN]

[SIREN WAILS IN DISTANCE]

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

Morning, Grey.

There's a trauma coming in.

Yeah, that's why I'm here.

[CHUCKLING] That's how you wait for a trauma?

[CRUNCHING] How am I supposed to wait?

I don't know.
Maybe a little less casually.

So...

[CRUNCHING]

Like, uh...

[SIGHS]

- Yeah.
- [LAUGHS]

Hey, where's the rig?

It's not here yet.

See?

Jo knows how to wait for a trauma.

No point in stressing out until you have to.

I don't believe in that.

You don't believe in that?

- Mnh-mnh.
- [SIREN APPROACHES]

And now I stand up straight.

[SIREN WAILING]

[WAILING CONTINUES]

[BRAKES SCREECH]

[GROANS, SNIFFLES]

- Hey.
- Hey.

You look awful.

[CHUCKLES] Thanks.

No, I mean, you should go home if you're sick.

Uh. Pit's full of people who look a lot worse than I do.

- Yeah, flu season.
- Yeah.

You're in scrubs?

Yeah.

I have to audition for Pierce, which is only slightly enraging.

Did you know that Alex Karev is interim chief?

I mean, time is so weird.

So, you're gonna work here?

And I find out after the fact.

[CHUCKLES]

That's par for the course.

Whoa, whoa, wait a minute.

- Where is this coming from?
- [SIGHS]

You said that you wanted to figure it out, and that's what I'm trying to do.

Yeah, me, too, but there's a lot to figure out.

And this whole situation is a mess.

Okay, let me remind you that the reason

I upended my entire life was for you so that you could be part of our baby's life.

Listen, Teddy, you came to Seattle the day after Karev's wedding, before me and Amelia had even really gotten back together.

You seemed pretty back together to me.

Right, right, and you took one look, and you decided that you had the whole picture.

Maybe if you'd just talked to me, been a little more up front with me...

Your teenager answered your door!

... maybe you would've saved a lot of people a lot of pain, but, no, you waited five whole weeks to...

Wait, are you try...
A-Are you saying that somehow it's my fault that you and Amelia are back together again?

I'm just saying it's a crap situation, which is worse than it would have been had you been a little more up front.

Had some excellent nicknames, but "Crap Situation" might be my new favorite.

♪♪

Amelia.

Hey, Amelia, I'm sorry.

[KEYS CLACKING LIGHTLY]

♪♪

Hey.

So...

I need a job.

And Karev said that I should talk to you.

♪♪

Her abdomen's distended. She may have some internal bleeding.

Let's get an ultrasound.

Let's hang some LR and a unit of O-neg.

She fell from a hotel balcony?

Three floors up.
Apparently the railing broke.

Pelvis feels stable, but I want to see an X-ray.

- Yes, Dr. Lincoln.
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God!

Natasha, I'm right here.

I'm right here. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Is she...

Is she on any medications?

Has she had any previous surgeries?

Um... uh, she... she gets migraines sometimes, and... and she has a scar from... she had her appendix out.

Is... Is she... I'm...

We're getting married tomorrow.

She didn't want me to see her until she walked down the aisle, and I... she got her own hotel room.

Hey, hey, hey. What's your name, buddy?

Garrett... Boland.

Garrett. Okay, well, the best thing you can do to help Natasha is to let the people in this room do what we know how to do, okay?

Okay, okay. Oh, God.

NURSE: Let me show you where to wait.

And I thought my wedding day was a mess.

I'm sorry I said that, Amelia.

- We were fighting, and it just...
- It happens.

Couples fight.

Oh, come on. We're not a couple.

Who's not a couple?

Owen and Teddy Altman. Only they are.

The baby really sells it.

Oh, there's a baby?

Do you mind? [COUGHS]

You know, I do, actually. We're busy.

Way too busy to catch whatever it is you're losing a fight against, so... you can go.

- Amelia, please.
- Owen, he's right.

We're going up against one of the nastiest tumors I've ever seen. We need to focus.

[EXHALES SHARPLY, COUGHS]

Altman's the tall blonde, right?

I am trying to focus. [SIGHS]

Uma Paxton, , here for total pelvic exenteration with flap reconstruction for a recurrent vaginal tumor.

Not total, Dr. Helm.

We are preserving the uterus.

Oh.

Wow, that's possible?

It is now.

Because I developed the technique.

My first doctors blasted me with chemo and radiation, but it came back, so they said I had to remove most of my insides, but Dr. Fox found a silver lining.

- Dr. Webber?
- I'll make an incision into your abdomen and remove your rectum to create a colostomy while Dr. Fox removes your bladder and creates a urostomy.

And then I will remove the tumor and everything but your uterus.

I'll lead on your vaginal reconstruction.

We'll cover any defects with skin and fat from your belly.

So... not complicated.

[ALL CHUCKLE]

Man, I didn't think that I ever wanted kids until I found out that I might not be able to have any, so thank you, Dr. Fox.

Uma, we've talked about this before, but now that the day has come, I really have to ask again.

This surgery's long, it's complex, and it's very personal.

Are you sure you're all right with other doctors watching from the gallery?

You're a pioneer, and this could help save more women like me.

So teach away.

All right, guys. Let's do this.

[CHUCKLES]

- [COUGHING]
- I'm gonna be right back, all right?

It's like a plague in here.

Bronchitis, pneumonia, some gastroenteritis.

[SNEEZES]

Whoa, you okay?

Ohh. What do we got?

Right. Uh, Grey and Link are in Trauma with a woman who fell from a balcony, and almost everyone else is flu-like symptoms.

- [COUGHING]
- Including you, I guess.

Look, if you want to grab some rest, I can page you if anything's urgent.

- Incoming!
- Uh... Ohh.

- Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!
- I'm gonna muscle through.

Could you, uh, prep an IV, uh, bag of LR and milligrams of Zofran?

- Yeah. You got it.
- Thanks.

So, we have our interdepartmental meetings, M&Ms, lung tumor boards, and such in the conference room.

Oh, good, you still do it there.

I-I moved it from the lecture hall to get a more open and honest exchange.

"A more open and honest exchange."

You don't say.

Well, it's just that my sister's kinda wrecked right now because you failed to have an open and honest exchange.

I told them.

You told them too late.

[SIGHS]

Are we gonna be able to work together, Dr. Pierce?

[SIGHS]

I've heard nothing but excellent things about your work, Dr. Altman, and any minute now, I will shove aside my personal contempt in favor of professional courtesy.

WOMAN ON P.A.: Dr. Huser to Labor and Delivery.

Dr. Huser to Labor and Delivery.

[SIGHS DEEPLY]

- On ... , , .
- What do we got?

Patient collapsed at a convenience store.

Last BP over , pulse .

Ma'am, did you lose consciousness?

Uh, no, I don't think so.

Hey, guys, what did you see?

She was like, "Ow, my stomach."

Then she was like, "Ow, my face."

- [CHUCKLES]
- Nice, guys. Real nice.

Ma'am, do you have any other symptoms uh, dizziness or headache?

Uh, yeah, headache because Gabe just told me today that his project is due tomorrow...

- Quit touching me!
- You touched me first!

... and I have the flu, and I hate children,

- so life is punishing me.
- ELI: No! Let me go!

So if I could just get something for my stomach

- and some sedatives for the children...
- Let me go!

- ... we'll be good to go.
- Hey, watch out.

Hey, guys, guys, knock it off.

Should we call their parents?

- I am their parents...
- ELI: It's your fault!

... ever since my sister d*ed, and clearly, I'm crushing it... Ow!

Abdomen's a little tender.

Uh, Schmitt, do you want to see if CT's open?

Whoa, CT? No, no, I'm fine.

I just have the flu, and I already took antibiotics I had left over from last year, so...

[TELEPHONE RINGING IN DISTANCE]

Bad idea?

Unprescribed? Yes.

Listen, I know that you're stressed, and maybe it is just the flu, but...

Claire, if it isn't, you're really gonna wish that you'd stayed, okay?

Are you okay?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm fine.

[CLEARS THROAT] He sounds like me.

[CHUCKLES]

Free fluid in the pelvis and abdomen.

CASEY: X-rays are up.

Post-ops are done, Link. What'd I miss?

You tell me.

She's got a windswept pelvis.

- "Windswept"?
- It's a combo platter.

We got AP compression on one side, lateral compression on the other.

You see the widened SI joint here and the sacral fracture there?

MEREDITH: Okay, well, I'd love to get her up to the O.R. for a neuro check.

And we can do an intra-op CT when we get there.

%. Let's do it.

Well, wait, aren't we gonna stabilize her pelvis first?

- Of course.
- Nah.

"Nah"? She's got a pelvic fracture.

You're not gonna at least put a binder on her?

Nope. We'll see you up there.

♪♪

[ALARM BLARING]

All right. She's hypotensive.

We got to move, people.

JO: She's all prepped for her ex-lap.

Okay, so what made you think that Link and I would be a good match?

Okay, listen, before I met Alex,

Link was the very best person that I knew, and Alex would say the same thing about you, so...

[LAUGHING] Oh, come on.
Link's a great guy.

And Labradors are great dogs.

They're always happy to see you, they're super cute, and they're full of energy.

Okay, listen. He is not a Labrador.

You just have to get to know him.

- [DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
- [PANTING]

Who's ready to put a pelvis back together, huh?

I am.

I am ready.

[WATER RUNNING]

Did you jog up here?

Ran up the stairs. Gets the blood flowing, you know?

We got to save this lady.
She's getting married.

We have to save them all, even the sad and lonely ones.

Is there another Dr. Grey you thought I should ask out?

[SIGHS]

Okay, just relax and try not to move, okay?

[SIGHS] I haven't relaxed in two years.

My mother used to say, "I hope you have children someday, and they're as awful to you as you were to me."

And I'd say, "Joke's on you, lady. I'm never having kids."

And then Cynthia d*ed, and now I have her two human tornadoes.

They're loud, and they're smelly, and they think fart jokes are hilarious, and they never stop eating.

I love them, but they are disgusting.

I think I owe my mom an apology.

Yeah, me too.

Whoa.

Her transverse colon is... is huge.

Toxic megacolon with peritoneal signs.

We're gonna need to get her to the O.R.

before her bowel perfs, okay?

I was hoping, if we start medially, we could remove the tumor en bloc.

[RAPID BEEPING]

- Ah...
- It's not working.

I know. Just...

Let's try coming from the inferior side.

Maybe if you approach it superiorly...

I am.

[SIGHS] Yeah, it's still not working.

You know, I can see that, Shepherd.

That's why we're practicing.

And at this rate, we will be ready in, what... five years?

Don't take your baby daddy drama out on our tumor baby.

We can do this.

[CELLPHONE CHIMES, VIBRATES]

Consult in the O.R. I'll be right back.

Wh-What... You're... You're leaving?

Do me a favor and come back with a little positivity!

[SIGHING]

[DOOR SLIDES SHUT]

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

[MONITOR BEEPING]

It's quite a crowd.

[CHUCKLES] Quite a surgery.

It sounds really complicated.
I hope it goes well.

Well, if you thought you might be performing your last surgery, wouldn't you want to go out with a bang?

Catherine told you?

This morning.

She's symptomatic. She's in pain.

[SIGHS DEEPLY]

This is not a simple surgery.

I mean, do you think this is a good idea?

I think she's Catherine Fox.

I think... she's gonna make her mark here.

And I think she has a stellar team by her side.

They're ready.

[MONITOR BEEPING, RESPIRATOR HISSING]

♪♪

Full house.

blade.

♪♪

AMELIA: No bleed, no indications for surgery.

Possibly an anoxic brain injury, so I'll monitor her closely in post-op.

LINK: Thank you, Shepherd.

MEREDITH: Basin.

Spleen is out.

Bleeding in the left-upper quadrant is controlled, but it must be coming from somewhere.

- How many units have we gone through?
- NICO: Eleven.

I'm gonna clamp the internal iliac,

- try to slow the bleeding.
- Mm-hmm.

Parker, just so you're clear, we would have gone through fewer units had we stabilized her in the E.R.

Yes, Dr. Gray.

- Retraction here, Nico.
- Got it.

A pelvic binder tamponades the bleeding... it's a very simple standard of care.

- Yes, ma'am.
- More retraction.

How did you even become a doctor with this sort of "everything'll work itself out" attitude?

I became a doctor the way everyone does, Grey.

I worked my ass off, I went to med school...

He became a doctor because he got cancer...

Jo, that's not your story to tell.

Sorry. But he's... he's not a lightweight,

- and he's not an idiot.
- Thank you.

Got it.

What? Where?

Check this out, Parker.

You want to make sure you pack below the pelvic brim.

That's where you're gonna run into a lot of the nasty vascular variants like the crown of death.

I had a hunch when I saw the X-ray, and I typically do use a pelvic binder, but in this case, it could've caused the internally rotated side to be crushed inward, causing even further damage.

And you couldn't have just said that in the E.R.?

I guess I could've, but I didn't realize part of my job was convincing you I belonged here.

[LIQUID SUCTIONING]

I thought I just had the flu and the antibiotics would knock it out.

No, no. The antibiotics wiped out the good bacteria in your intestine, which caused severe inflammation that made you pass out.

But we caught it just in time.

Just in time?

Like, before it k*lled me?

Oh, God. I-I... I-I can't die.

[VOICE BREAKING] Those boys can't lose another parent.

Eli just got to the point where he's not crying at night.

They... They need me.

They need... [SCREAMS]

Okay, the bowel seems to have ruptured.

Let's, uh, get her intubated and prepped.

DELUCA: She's moving too much.

Okay, let's push
of propofol with of sux.

- Already on it.
- Good.

- What?
- I-I... Oops.

- [WINCES]
- Oh, my God.

Oh, God, did you...

I'm so sorry.

Okay, everybody, stop! Listen to me.

The propofol and sux had just been accidentally injected into my IV, which means I have about seconds until I will be paralyzed.

So let's page the chief.

DeLuca, start the surgery, stat.

Uh, I'm gonna need somebody to put a tube in me, because once I am down, I'm gonna lose my airway, and if I can't breathe, then I will die.

I'd also appreciate it if somebody could help me by breaking my fa...

- Patient's intubated.
- Okay, Schmitt, look at me.

Don't rock the laryngoscope, okay?

blade.

♪♪

Now, drive the tube in between his vocal chords.

Dr. Hunt, you may experience some discomfort now.

- Schmitt, he can't hear you.
- I've never done this.

That doesn't mean you can't, all right?

Now, Bovie.

♪♪

[MONITOR BEEPING]

♪♪

I did it. I did it!

Okay, do not stop bagging, okay?

Get him upstairs, hook him up to some fluids.

Now. Come on. Let's go.

[METAL CLINKS LIGHTLY]

[MONITOR BEEPING]

She's in a coma?

It's a medically induced coma.

The sedation will keep her calm and allow her body to heal.

[MONITOR BEEPING]

But... she will wake up?

Natasha lost a lot of blood, and her body underwent severe stress.

We don't always know how a patient's gonna recover from that.

So she won't wake up.

We can't know for sure.

We will continue to monitor her and support her and do everything we can.

I don't know what to do.

You can hold her hand.
You can speak to her.

She may be able to hear you.

[BEEPING CONTINUES]

She was gonna wear a blue dress... for our wedding.

She's not a traditionalist, and...

[VOICE BREAKING] ... she's not a kid.

We waited forever to meet each other.

It was just this one tradition... sleeping apart.

We thought it would bring us good luck.

I don't want to do life without you now that I know what it's like with you.

[INHALES SHARPLY]

[VOICE BREAKING] Wake up...

♪♪

... and marry me.

[SNIFFLES]

Please.

Please.

[CRYING]

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

What's wrong?

I'm just glad that you're alive, glad that we're alive.

Me too.

- I have a surgery. You okay?
- Yeah.

Hey, thanks for marrying me.

You're welcome.

KORACICK: I know, Shepherd. I know.

I've run every one of those scenarios!

AMELIA: I am just trying to be realistic.

Well, maybe if you'd stop running off to consults...

That has nothing to do with the fact that we are staring down the impossible here.

Where is the Amelia Shepherd that looked at Nicole Herman's inoperable brain tumor and said, "Yes, I can, and I should"?

That was Brain Tumor Amelia.

Non-Brain Tumor Amelia is a reasonable surgeon who asks reasonable questions.

- I...
- And she is currently speaking in the third person, so, you know...

This is what we are dealing with.

We have to visualize this.

Well, that would be lovely, but it's not an option.

Yes, it is.

Okay, you guys were talking really loud, so I'm not gonna apologize for eavesdropping despite your angry faces.

- Jo...
- No, th-there is a way to -D visualize a tumor like that.

It's brand-new, and they're about to do the first launch of it at UCSD.

- It's called the ORBEYE.
- Oh.

Can I just see your...

That's... Yeah, that's fine. G-Go ahead.

[WHISPERING] Who is she?

[WHISPERING] She's a surgical fellow studying future medicine.

That's not a thing.

Uh, am I dreaming, 'cause she, uh, just walked in with a miracle, and she looks like a... mermaid.

It's still a giant tumor, Tom.

[SHUSHING]

- Just let me have this.
- Okay.

♪♪

What?

[RESPIRATOR HISSING]

I want him to be on fluids, and check his vitals every minutes.

I don't want to miss any bumps in Dr. Hunt's numbers.

- Of course, Doctor.
- What the hell happened?

He said that he had the flu.

I mean, I told him to go home, but what is it?

Is it pneumonia? A P.E.?
What happened to him?!

He was injected with a paralytic by mistake in surgery.

[MONITOR BEEPING]

Oh.

Um... That's, uh...

I'm watching him.

I promise, I'll make sure he comes through.

Respectfully, I'm not going anywhere.

Hey.

What?

No one has ever started a sentence to me with the word "respectfully."

WOMAN ON P.A.: Dr. Ryan to Oncology.

Dr. Ryan to Oncology.

MEREDITH: Yeah, no. I get it.

Thank you. Thanks.

[CELLPHONE BEEPS]

- Everything okay?
- No.

I have a bunch of -year-olds on their way to my house for a birthday party, and Hulk just canceled.

The Hulk.

What?

It's "The Hulk," not "Hulk."

Whatever.

I could help.

Seriously?

After the day we just had, I could use a party.

For -year-olds?

I was a Cub Scout.

I make a mean s'more.

But, I mean, if you don't need the help...

No, wait.

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

I'll take the help.

[MONITOR BEEPING, RESPIRATOR HISSING]

[LIQUID SUCTIONING]

Something wrong?

Tissue's too friable.

Can I help?

You can stop talking so I can hear myself think.

[ARON WRIGHT'S "SCARED TO LOVE" PLAYS]

[SIGHS]

[EXHALES SHARPLY] She's incredible.

Hmm, if by "incredible," you mean she possesses an absurd level of stubbornness, then, yeah, she is incredible.

- ♪ Be yourself ♪
- She's only out-stubborned by the other two people operating with her.

♪ Be nothing less ♪

I'm, um, trying to be better

- ♪ Make your choice ♪
- about expressing my feelings.

- ♪ And let it rest ♪
- I never asked you to.

- ♪ When you're looking for a meaning ♪
- Jackson did.

Now he's sharing nothing about his feelings with me or with Catherine.

♪ When you're lost in the haze ♪

Neither is Richard, and who knows what's going on in Catherine's head?

- ♪ In yourself is the healing ♪
- They are stubborn.

- ♪ Be the choices you've made ♪
- My mother did the same thing.

She hid her cancer from me, tried to protect me, and all I can think of is how much time we lost.

♪ How you going to know what you're looking for? ♪

And they could have that time if they just talked.

So you want them to hug it all out right now over an open abdomen?

I'm saying you can waste a lot of time waiting for the right moment.

That storm's gonna come when it comes.

♪ And I'm scared to love ♪

How can you just accept that?

♪ You're scared to love ♪

I'm trying to be better about not trying to control the things I can't.

♪ Here we are, here we are ♪

♪ Just a little life on a spinning rock ♪

- ♪ And you're scared to love ♪
- CATHERINE: Wipes.

♪ I'm scared to love ♪

[MONITOR BEEPING, LIQUID SUCTIONING]

Hemostat, quickly.

♪♪

Mom, if you're in pain, I can take over. It's fine.

Yes, Jackson, I'm in pain.

I'm in pain because, when this woman wakes up, she will not have a uterus.

The radiation has fried her tissues.

It's falling apart in my hands.

No matter how many times I try, I cannot safely separate the uterus without compromising the blood supply.

It's literally disintegrating right before my eyes.

Her body's been through too much.

[SIGHS]

You can't fix that.

- Neither can I.
- Okay.

No one can fix this.

♪ Scared to love, scared to love ♪

♪ Scared to love, scared to love ♪

[SIGHS] I'm taking out the uterus.

Bovie.

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Scared to love, scared to love ♪

Ready?

♪ Scared to love ♪

♪ Scared to love ♪

Close her up.

♪♪

[BEEPING, SUCTIONING CONTINUE]

♪♪

- Hunt was given paralytics?
- Yes, but it was a mistake, and we got him intubated and off to a room.

And I've also isolated the area of perforation and washed her out.

All right. Right. Since it's toxic megacolon, you're gonna have to...

Perform a subtotal colectomy with an ileostomy.

I did that, too.

All right, so, what's left?

[MONITOR BEEPING, RESPIRATOR HISSING]

[SIGHS] I... I don't know.

You don't know.

It's my first time, okay?

Can you just tell me what to do next?

You don't know because there's nothing left.

You did it.

You stepped up.

All right, well, don't get too swelled up about it.

But great work. Good job.

Close.

♪♪

- [COUGHING]
- TEDDY: Okay, all right.

Breathe, breathe. There you go.

All right. All right. Okay. Breathe.

- Welcome back, Dr. Hunt.
- Ugh.

Dr. DeLuca finished Claire's surgery.

They did the subtotal colectomy, and she's in recovery now.

[HOARSELY] Oh, great. Thank you.

And thank you for not dying.

[CHUCKLES] Okay, we're done.

Thank you, Doctor...

Schmitt, but everybody calls me...

[MONITOR BEEPING]

You know what? No. Just Dr. Schmitt.

[CLEARS THROAT LIGHTLY]

[CLATTERS]

[BEEPING CONTINUES]

- Ohh.
- How you feeling?

Ugh, like I got hit with a brick.

[CHUCKLES WEAKLY]

How was your first day with Pierce?

[CHUCKLES]

Yeah, well... [SNIFFS]

She is Amelia's sister, so...

[ICE CRUNCHES]

All right, you know what? Um...

[CHAIR WHEELS ROLLING]

Listen.

I didn't do anything to Amelia.

I didn't... I didn't set out to hurt anyone, and I know that I'm... I'm not perfect, and I have made plenty of mistakes here, but you showed up in Germany, and then you came back here, and you did what you did, so please just stop making everything my fault.

Landstuhl was my perfect job.

I was in charge, I was respected, and they've not yet filled that position, and in Germany, the maternity leave is... is really generous.

You... You... Are you saying you want to go back?

I'm saying I'm having a hard time wanting to stay here and answer to a -something who hates me.

I'm saying I don't understand why I'm the only one who has to sacrifice anything so that our kid has two parents.

I mean... [SIGHS]

... you could move to Germany.

They've got a great paternity leave there, too.

[BEEPING CONTINUES]

Stay here. Work in Trauma.

I don't want to work for you, Owen.

- Are you even listening to me?
- No, no.

I'm saying...

run the department.

I'll work for you.

I mean, you're more than qualified, and we still have a position that we haven't filled, and... and you're right.

Teddy... you sacrificed a lot to come here, and now... now it is my turn.

Are you giving me your job?

Teddy...

[QUIETLY] You're giving me a lot more.

[SIGHS]

[WALDECK'S "KEEP MY FIRE BURNING" PLAYS]

♪ Who will keep my fire burning? ♪

♪♪

♪ Keep my heart yearning? ♪

♪♪

♪ Who will keep my fire burning? ♪

♪♪

♪ Keep my wheels turning? ♪

♪♪

♪ One, two, three, wait a second for me ♪

♪ And tell me, where's my man? ♪

♪ Who will set my soul on fire? ♪

- ♪ And feed my desire? ♪
- Uh, hi.

I saved Dr. Hunt's life today.

- ♪ Who will knock at my door? ♪
- I wasn't Glasses.

- ♪ And make me beg for more? ♪
- I wasn't bumbly.

I didn't drop anything.

- ♪ One, two, three, ♪
- I... felt like a different person.

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

♪ Tell me, where's my man? ♪

- ♪ Who will keep my fire burning? ♪
- I think it's you.

I think you're rubbing off on me.

Or, uh, you know, something that sounds less dirty.

I think this has always been you, and...

- you just didn't know it.
- ♪ Keep my wheels turning? ♪

[EXHALES SHARPLY]

♪ One, two, three, wait a second for me ♪

♪ One, two, three, wait a second for me ♪

♪ One, two, three, wait a second for me ♪

♪ Tell me, where's my man? ♪

You saved my life.

Thank you for doing this.

You really don't have to keep saying that.

I'm happy to help.

You seemed kind of... stressed.

Thought you didn't believe in stress.

I believe it exists.

I just don't believe in letting it run your life.

I mean, spending your childhood in a hospital, losing half the friends you made there to a cancer you survived, watching your parents split up because they could barely afford your treatments... made me kind of picky about what I let get to me.

Dude!

- Look at this place!
- [LAUGHS]

We did this in, like, a half an hour.

And I was an ass to you all day.

I literally did nothing to deserve this.

[SIGHS] True.

But... I think I kind of like the chase.

[TAPS LIGHTLY]

[DOG BARKING IN DISTANCE]

Because women just throw themselves at you?

- That's not a phrase I would ever use.
- [DOOR OPENS]

Ready or not, here we are!

- Hello!
- Happy birthday, Bailey!

- [CHUCKLING] All right!
- [LAUGHS]

What do you think?

- Come on, you guys!
- Hey!

Presents go right over there.

Wait.

Are you Thor?

I am.

So cool!

Now, which one of you kids stole my hammer?

- Aah!
- [LAUGHTER]

[ALL SHOUTING]

[LAUGHTER]

♪♪

I completed the ostomies, and Jackson closed with a flap.

Uma's in recovery.

How is she doing?

[SIGHS] Stable.

Now, look, Mom, I know you're frustrated, okay?

Frustrated?

I'm livid.

You questioned my ability to complete that surgery.

You inferred that I am somehow not capable...

You had a massive tumor on your spine, and you didn't say anything about it.
- [SCOFFS]

You didn't even tell me you had cancer.

I wasn't ready to bring anyone else into it.

Except you did.

- You told Maggie.
- I did not tell Maggie.

- I told Meredith.
- Right. That's different.

Tom Koracick.

I see. Just the important people.

- I told people who could help.
- Wow.

Good Lord, that's offensive.

Do you have any idea what that sounds like?

Richard, please. How am I supposed to depend on you when you're hanging out in bars, swinging baseball bats?

- No, no, now, that's not his business...
- Wait, what?

... and that's not what we're talking about.

You all are acting like such big old babies.

- This is my problem!
- Oh, the hell it is.

No more than my first wife's Alzheimer's was her problem.

- This is all our problems, Catherine.
- No, no.

- You do not want to go in there.
- Sorry. Wait. Can we go back?

- There's a... a big storm in there.
- What happened at the bar?

A big, big storm.

Are you serious? That's disgusting.

Amen.

Stop it. Stop it. Stop it!

Now, I was not wrong not to tell you.

You were... This is what you always do.

It's exactly what you always do...now, you try to control everyone and everything that you're around.

And look what happens when I don't.

I'm gone for two days, and my husband has an arrest record. I'm married to a felon.

Mom, he just said they were trying to give sh*ts to people with AA chips.

I would've smashed the damn place up myself.

Thank you. Uh, I mean, that... that's... that's still, uh, no... no excuse for my behavior.

I mean, I realize that now, but...

We can handle bad news, all right?

We're surgeons.

- And we're your family.
- [SIGHS]

We deserve the truth.

You two both know if I had told you any sooner you would've driven me crazy, ordering every test under the sun.

At least Thomas...

Don't... Don't say that man's name again.

Richard, honestly, your jealousy is your least attractive quality.

And lying doesn't look very good on you, either, Catherine.

No, you don't get to say that to me.

You don't get to talk to me like that!

Not now, not with all that I'm going through!

Mom, you're seriously gonna play...

Play the cancer card? You're damn Skippy.

And I'll be irrational, and I'll make bad decisions, and I can play the cancer card all I want, because I'm the one with the damn cancer!

[VOICE BREAKING]
And talking to both of you makes it true.

♪♪

Hey. Hey.

[CRYING]

♪♪

But, luckily, Dr. DeLuca was here to take over for me.

- Wow. I wish I could've seen that.
- Mm.

Are you okay?

We're sorry.

For what?

You don't have to be sorry.

Today was a really scary day.

And I'm gonna need both of you to help me for a little while.

You can start by going into my wallet, getting some money, getting yourself some pizza.

Aunt Claire is starving, so save me some.

- Yes, ma'am.
- Okay.

- You can't eat, Claire.
- Shh.

[INHALES DEEPLY]

It makes them feel better to help.

[SIGHS]

Ohh, I can't believe I almost d*ed.

Well, you were in good hands.

Thank you for saving my life.

You're very welcome.

And you.

♪ Take it in ♪

Thank you for making me stay.

Yeah.

♪ While you can ♪

♪ On the edge of it all ♪

♪♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪♪

♪ I feel it coming ♪

♪ Hold your breath ♪

♪ Don't let go ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ I feel it coming ♪

♪ Hold your breath ♪

[PANTING]

Hey. Hey.

Honestly, Owen, I'm... I'm too tired.

I gave Teddy my job.

- Okay.
- Yeah.

'Cause I want her to stay.

I want her here. I want the baby here.

[BREATHES SHARPLY] Clearly.

It's the truth, Amelia, and I have to be able to tell you the truth.

I have to be able to make mistakes, because there is no clear path here.

The only thing I know for sure is that I am having a baby with Teddy and that I have a very real family with you, and I don't want to do any of it without you.

I miss you.

I miss us.

♪ On the edge of it all ♪

- ♪ Take it in ♪
- I don't need time.

I need you.

♪ While you can ♪

- ♪ On the edge ♪
- [SIGHS]

♪ Of it all ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

What took you so long?

- ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
- I was paralyzed.

- Seriously...
- No, literally.

- What?
- Yeah, it was weird. It was...

- Are you...
- Yeah.

- ♪ I feel it coming ♪
- It was, like...

[TELEPHONE RINGS IN DISTANCE]

What?

Cheat Day. [CHUCKLES]

Mm...

You're about, what, weeks, right?

Do you work for a carnival?

Every other week. Want a ticket?

[CHUCKLES]

I'm Tom.

I'm sorry.

I can't hear you over the smell of those fries.

Oh, here.

Here. Do your worst.

I have feet on my hands.

I'm not gonna feed you unless I have to.

- I don't even know you.
- Well, that's on you.

I tried to introduce myself.

Teddy Altman. New Chief of Trauma.

I know.

Tom Koracick, world-renowned neurosurgeon.

- Oh.
- We good?

- Better.
- Hmm.

You really want one, don't you?

- I really do.
- Yeah.

[CHUCKLES] Here.

[CRUNCHING] Mmm!

MEREDITH: Help comes in many forms.

- Mm-hmm.
- All right.

A kidney, a kind gesture,

a friend to light your way.

♪♪

[GROANS]

Still...

too often we insist on doing it ourselves.

♪ You're angry, but you don't know how to be that yet ♪

What's he doing?

CASEY: Trying to touch his eyeball.

Why?

Because I want to look as different as I feel.

♪♪

- ♪ Resistance seems impossible... ♪
- Ugh.

- Do you want me to do it?
- Yes, please.

- ♪ ... from down this low ♪
- [CHUCKLES]

We're afraid of looking weak,

of not being tough.

♪ And surely no one else can feel like this ♪

- [LAUGHS]
- Truth is, we're all capable

of walking through the world by ourselves.

LINK: I take it back.

- What?
- I don't blame you for being stressed.

- [CHUCKLES]
- Three kids is no joke.

- [SIGHS LOUDLY]
- And you run a department, win awards.

I'm shocked you're not more stressed.

Well, trust me... I'm having a glass of wine with Thor, and all I'm doing is thinking about how much stuff I have to do tomorrow.

♪ Sound and pulse and volume ♪

What?

You like me.

I don't dislike you.

[BOTH LAUGH]

Which is an improvement from this morning, right?

- [CHUCKLES]
- [CELLPHONE CHIMES, VIBRATES]

I won't be offended if you have to check that.

I'm gonna give myself a moment.

♪ This is so damn simple, yeah ♪

♪ It's so damn simple ♪

I have figured out why you run so much, though.

You eat more junk food than any surgeon I've ever met.

One perk of being a cancer kid...

I get to eat whatever I want, and no one can tell me no.

- [LAUGHS]
- ♪ This is so damn simple ♪

But most of the time,

- life is better with company.
- [SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

♪♪

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

[LAUGHS]