07x21 - Homecoming

[bunniefuu]

Previously on "Once Upon a Time"...

I remember. Everything.

I love you.

[WHOOSH]

Henry?

You broke the curse.

GOLD: When I pass the dagger on to this Guardian,

the Darkness will finally rest.

And I will be reunited with Belle.

SAMDI: Trying to get back to your beloved

has made you the worst version of you.

[GROANS]

[BODY THUDS]

RUMPLESTILTSKIN: Hello, Dearie!

Did you really think a wish realm could hold me?

HENRY: I need to figure out what my story is.

It's time I figure out where I belong.

[HORSE WHINNIES]

I knew I'd find you.

[GROWLING]

[ROARS]

[ROARS]

[BODY THUDS]

Don't worry. I got this.

[WHOOSH]

You saved me.

My hero.

Henry?

What are you doing here?

I, uh...

was in the neighborhood.

Thought you could use another familiar face when you woke up.

Well, thank you.

I don't know what I would have done without your support.

Isn't he sweet?

Like the brother I never had.

[SIGHS]

[GROANS]

Some scars go more than skin deep.

And I have a feeling that one goes right to the bone.

Rumplestiltskin. What are you doing here?

I come all the way from the Wish Realm

just to see you, and that's my welcome?

I don't care what version of the Dark One you are.

I'm not in the mood for your games.

Games? I don't have time for games, Dearie.

I'm here to offer you a deal.

No.

All your deals come with a price.

And I'm not interested in paying it.

And why not?

I can get you a happy beginning, middle, and an end.

Beautiful princess. Sparkling castle.

Anything you dream can be yours.

Thanks, but I'll be all right.

Perhaps.

Don't thr*aten me.

Not a thr*at, Dearie.

An observation.

But good luck.

If things don't improve, consider this a standing offer.

I'll be here for you.

Always.

No need.

I know your tricks.

You make people feel desperate

so they start losing hope...

- Hm.
- and think that doing the wrong thing

is their only option.

I'll find my happy ending the right way.

I don't need your help.

We'll see about that.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

Okay.

One hot cocoa with cinnamon for my daughter

and one drink special for my wife.

My mom calls it "The Weed k*ller."

I love it.

Especially the plant sprig.

How about a toast?

Oh, good idea.

To being together.

We can drink to that, too.

And eat to it.

We brought some of Sabine's beignets.

- Mmm!
- Mmm.

Hey, Alice.

How's your father?

He should be discharged from the hospital

and back home today.

So things are starting to look right side up.

Oh, I'm glad.

Yeah. Us too.

- How about we all get some food? Yeah?
- Yep.

- Yeah.
- Yes.

Hey, Remy, will you take those to the bar?

[SNIFFS] Do I smell beignets?

- Mm-hmm.
- Sure!

Hey, uh...

not to ruin the fun, but I just wanted to check in.

See if you've heard from Facilier.

Uh, no, I haven't.

You think we should be worried

that he might be up to something?

I don't know.

[CELLPHONE RINGS]

[CELLPHONE BEEPS]

Starfish?

TILLY: Yes, Papa, it's me.

It's, uh...

it's nice to hear your voice.

[CHUCKLES]

Try looking across the street.

Now, I know I can't come any closer.

Not without putting you back in that awful hospital.

But I did want to see you.

Yeah, I know. It's okay.

How are you? How's Robin?

Yeah, good. Great.

We, uh... we've just come back from a party.

- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.

Everyone sends their best.

We were celebrating the end of the curse and...

everyone being together.

Yeah, sounds fun.

Yeah, it was.

But then I started thinking about how no curse...

you and me...

well, we can't be together.

I know it's hard right now,

but it won't be like this for too long.

I promise you. I will find a way to fix this.

Okay.

I love you.

I love you, too, Starfish.

[CELLPHONE BEEPS]

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

[KNOCKING]

Samdi?

Are you in here?

Facilier?

[WATER RUNNING]

[MUFFLED GASP]

[WHOOSH]

[PANTING]

Gold.

[GRUNTS]

What happened to you?

Did Facilier do this?

I'm sorry, Regina.

Facilier's dead.

I'm afraid my alter ego from the Wish Realm

made an unexpected appearance.

He's here?

What the hell does he want?

Wow! They look delicious, Luce.

They're to make up for all the celebrations we missed

because of the curse.

So, is everyone ready to make a wish?

You know, this whole story started years ago

with a wish on a cupcake.

When my mom wished not to be alone and we were reunited.

And now, finally, I'm reunited with my family.

Honestly, I don't even know what to wish for,

because I just got everything I could ever want.

Me too.

All right.

Here we go.

[WIND WHOOSHES]

Ella?

Lucy?

I'm afraid you're not gonna be able to find them, Dearie.

At least not without my help.

What happened?

Where are my family? What did you do to them?

Well, I sent them back to my home.

In the Wish Realm.

Rather ironic, don't you think?

An entire world created by a wish.

They can be quite powerful things.

Why are you doing this? What do you want?!

I know you don't remember,

but I warned a younger version of you once.

That you'd never get your happy ending without my help.

So now I'm gonna prove my point.

- How?
- By striking a deal, of course.

If you ever want to see your family again,

you're gonna get me something I want.

My lesser half's copy of the Dark One Dagger.

[SIGHS]

H-He's determined to surrender his dagger

to some "guardian," and I can't let that happen.

It won't just destroy his power, you see?

It'll destroy mine, too.

Love has poisoned him.

Love is a weakness, and he's infected.

What makes you think I can get it?

That I would get it?

I think we both know the answer to that, Dearie.

You're motivated.

I prey on desperate souls, remember?

And right now, with your family gone,

that soul is you.

Sounds like this Rumplestiltskin

is even more dangerous than the last,

if he got the better of you.

Ah, his victory is temporary.

My revenge won't be.

Our revenge.

You're not the only one he hurt today.

To revenge, then.

A companion we all know far too well.

[DOOR OPENS]

I'm glad I found you.

Henry. What's wrong?

Rumplestiltskin took Lucy and Ella.

He said he's gonna keep them in the Wish Realm until I...

until I give him the Dark One Dagger.

I should have seen this coming.

You don't have to worry, Henry.

We're gonna get your family back. Together.

So, what are you suggesting? I give up the dagger?

No, of course not.

We don't negotiate with villains.

We kick ass and protect the people we love.

[CHUCKLES]

That would actually make a pretty good family motto.

But right now, my family is stuck in the Wish Realm,

and we have no way to get to them.

Whoa, whoa. Don't be so sure about that.

The Wish Realm was my home port,

and I may have a route back.

I never thought I'd say this again.

Captain Hook is ready to go back home.

[DOOR OPENS]

There you are.

Thought you'd be out celebrating.

[LAUGHS]

The curse is broken, Your Majesty.

People should be cooking beignets for you.

Cooking helps me clear my head.

Or at least it used to help Sabine.

[SIGHS]

It's a crazy thing, isn't it?

Remembering who you really are.

But that is just it...

I don't know who I am.

I mean, yesterday, I was Sabine,

and all I had to worry about was the price of butter.

And then the curse breaks, and now I'm Tiana, and...

I was a...

I mean, I was...

A queen.

It's okay to say it.

Well, I sure don't feel like one.

A real queen would be out there helping her people,

and I'm hiding in here, stress baking.

I mean, I was cursed a really long time.

Maybe I just... forgot how to be Tiana.

Hey, hey, hey. Come on.

Did you forget yesterday?

You can call yourself Sabine or Tiana or anything you want,

but the woman who risked her life for me...

That was a queen.

It's my queen.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

You always did have a way with words, Prince Naveen.

Mm. [LAUGHS]

RONI: The good news is, Rogers was right.

Alice did have a looking glass in her boxcar.

Amongst other things.

Well, my daughter was always a pack rat.

- What's the bad news?
- Well, it's cracked.

Which means it's possible its magic may not work.

Well, there's only one way to find out.

As long as you understand.

Taking on this Rumplestiltskin

in his own patch won't be a walk in the park.

He'll make sure of that.

You think he's expecting us?

Well, I would.

And I'd prepare something unpleasant.

Well, hey, listen.

Maybe I should do this alone.

Stop it, Henry.

You're not leaving your mother behind.

We're all with you till the end.

All right, one last grand adventure.

Let's go get your family.

[GRUNTS]

Hook?!

Gold?!

What happened to them?

I'm not sure.

But we've got bigger things to worry about.

Where are we?

[SIGHS] Rumple's castle.

The Wish Realm edition.

Looks a lot darker than the original.

By the looks of it, a few things have changed

since the last time I was...

- here.
- Yes, they certainly have.

Peter Pan?

What happened to you?

What happened to this land?

My son happened.

He never forgives, and he never forgets.

Guess neither of us grew up.

Your son took my family.

I need to know where they are.

Your guess is as good as mine.

But I recommend you abandon all hope

of finding them and leave.

Because while good things come into my son's castle...

they never come out.

Still no sign of Roni or Henry.

And if this place is part of the Wish Realm,

I've certainly never been to it.

Well, I can't account for the others,

but I know exactly where we are.

This is my old home.

Or at least this realm's version of it.

I never wanted to see this place again.

Which is why we're here.

This Rumple's pushing buttons.

He cracked Tilly's looking glass

to manipulate exactly where we all ended up.

And this detour is meant to?

To remind me of when I became a coward.

[SCREAMING]

I used this to hobble myself

to avoid fighting in the Ogre's w*r.

But this is one battle I won't back away from.

If this Rumplestiltskin wants a fight,

that's exactly what he's gonna get.

Hey, look. You tried that once before,

and you ended up as insulation in a voodoo doctor's wall.

So, what do you propose we do?

This realm is my home.

I know a place where we can go to get help.

My old hideout.

I-I know. It's a bit cluttered.

But it is beachfront property.

All this created by a wish.

Well, we're all created somehow.

Make no mistake, I'm as real as you.

I wouldn't dare suggest otherwise.

Good. Because the Wish version of you

seems to be creating real problems for everyone here.

Can we get to the solution you promised?

Because all I see is a cave where booze goes to perish.

Truth is,

this is where I came to do the same.

I gave up on ever being reunited with Alice.

If it wasn't for a good friend,

I might never have charted the right course again.

[CONCH HORN BLOWS]

Ariel.

Many years, and pounds, have passed

since I last saw you, Captain.

Look out!

The Dark One!

Perhaps you should bring your fish-tailed friend up to speed.

Uh, short version, Ariel...

Looks like the villain, but isn't.

The truth is, I'm here to help rid this place

of the Rumple you rightly fear.

We were hoping that you might be able to give us an advantage.

You don't happen to have some squid ink

that would could use to defeat our foe?

I may have saved a few drops.

Use it wisely, Hook.

There are a lot of lives at stake.

Maybe this is the wrong place.

If Wish Rumple really had Ella and Lucy here,

why isn't it guarded?

I think you may have spoken too soon.

Never took the Dark One for an animal lover.

Let's not confuse who tugs the leash 'round here.

Hello, darling.

Cruella De Vil.

Well, I thought you were above being Rumple's lapdog.

I'm not anyone's anything.

I was just promised a couple of new furs

for a fun evening of k*lling

whoever came knocking at the door.

Oh, then again,

perhaps we can strike a bargain

for you to be my chew toy.

Fancy a little, uh, scratch behind the ear, darling?

Twisted's not really my type.

[GRUNTS]

Your loss.

I got this.

[BOTH GRUNTING]

[GASPS]

I mean, surely, such a noble group

wouldn't m*rder an unarmed woman, hmm?

Oh, no, of course not.

But we would certainly tighten your leash.

[WHOOSH]

Now, be a good girl

and tell me where Rumple put Henry's wife and daughter.

Your little mutts are in the dungeon.

But knowing where they are and freeing them

is a completely different animal.

[MUFFLED SHOUTING]

I hear their voices.

[SHOUTING CONTINUES]

Daddy!

Ella! Lucy!

Daddy!

Daddy, help us, please!

RUMPLESTILTSKIN: Yes.

Well, you wanted a happy ending.

Now you can stick yours on a shelf.

You magicked them in. I can magic them out.

Wrong, Dearie. This bauble is unbreakable.

No one can set them free but me.

And given that I don't want to, inside, they shall stay.

They don't deserve this.

You've only got yourself to blame.

I told you you'd get your family back

when you brought me the dagger.

But you tried to cheat the terms of our deal.

My grandfather needs that dagger to get back to Belle.

I can't trade my happy ending for his.

It's not right.

Blah, blah, blah.

Blathering your misguided nonsense!

And you want to trade your happiness for his.

And people say I'm crazy.

We're not trading anything.

We'll figure out another way to get them out.

Yeah, maybe you will, maybe you won't.

But the real question is,

will you do so in time?

[WIND WHISTLING]

What?

Dad.

What have you done?

Added some incentive.

The globe will be filled with snow by midnight.

And in this fairy tale,

your Cinderella won't lose a coach or a dress.

She and your daughter will lose their lives.

Mom, stop. You're making it worse.

It's going to be fine, Henry.

They're freezing in there.

I'll find a way to get them out.

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

It may not be quite as simple as that.

The magic that created this prison

cannot be undone like that.

The only way to free your family

is by going after Rumplestiltskin himself.

No. No, he'll just make it worse for them.

You don't want to use your mother's magic

or your grandfather's plan.

What do you suggest, mate?

I suggest that we consider the one sure way to save them.

No.

We give up the dagger if it's the only way to save my family.

- It's not an option.
- Why not?

Because I seem to remember that you were willing

to cast a curse when it came to taking care of your own son.

Henry. You're better than that.

Maybe.

But maybe it's time that we all ask ourselves...

Who really deserves their happy ending?

Oh.

You're letting your emotions cloud your judgment.

The Captain and I have already found a way

to gain the upper hand.

So you stay here, and I'll deal with him.

We're just letting him go?

What if he's really going to cut his own deal with Rumple?

I'll go with him. Make sure he's stays honest.

You don't have any magic.

I'll go.

There's a library in this castle.

Find a spell that'll work on that snow globe...

before it's too late.

We really do hate this place.

Bane of our existence, Dearie.

And yet, after everything we've been through to escape it,

all you want to do is give up our power

and drag us right back.

Might as well hobble both our legs this time.

I didn't come here to revisit history.

Or repeat it.

Of course.

I know that.

I know you.

I am you.

You're looking for a loophole to help your grandson

and his family escape their frosty predicament.

Well, perhaps you don't know me... or yourself...

Quite as well as you think.

That's not the loophole I'm here to discuss.

Really?

I've been trying to rid myself of my copy of the dagger

for quite some time now.

And every time I try to do it the right way,

by giving it to someone pure,

it's always a burden.

A corrupting force.

And foisting that onto an innocent?

Well, that can never be right.

Indeed. That is a sticky wicket.

But you... you want the darkness.

Giving it to you, I'm not spreading it,

I'm not burdening anyone.

I think the real loophole

I've been looking for all this time...

is you.

So...

you want to make a deal and give me the dagger now.

What could possibly have changed?

Well, I've finally realized the one enemy

I can never defeat...

is myself.

So you take the dagger

and all the darkness that goes with it,

and I get to go free

and get the happy ending I deserve.

Well, it's not exactly the way I expected this

to play out, but I'll take it.

[CHUCKLES]

[LAUGHS]

Squid ink.

Now who's weak?

This can't hold me for long.

It doesn't have to.

You see, you made a miscalculation

bringing me here.

It did remind me of my weakness,

but not because of that hammer.

Because of you.

You see, without Belle, you are just a pathetic beast

who needs to be put out of his misery.

And I'm the only one who can do it.

You do that,

and you will never see your precious Belle again.

If that means ridding the realms of you,

that's a risk I'm willing to take.

[DOOR OPENS]

Regina!

What the hell are you doing?

Get out of here.

Too late.

Impeccable timing, Dearie.

- [WHOOSH]
- [CHOKING]

That dagger was never why I was after Henry.

What?

Haven't you figured it out?

Thought the hammer would have jogged your memory.

The day we hobbled ourselves, we met a seer,

and she gave us a prophecy.

SEER: Beware, Rumplestiltskin.

The boy will be my undoing.

Yes.

And today's the day

that prophecy finally comes to pass.

I think I just figured out a way to save my family...

without handing over the dagger.

Well, that's great news.

Well, what... what do we need to do?

There's no time. I have to go.

Yeah, of course. I'm coming with you.

No, I can do this on my own.

But you don't have to.

No, you're not doing this alone.

I was afraid you'd say that.

I'm sorry, but if you knew where I was going,

you wouldn't help.

You'd try to stop me.

And no one is stopping me.

APPRENTICE: Turn around, brigand.

Do not be fooled.

I am blind, but my sword is still sharp.

I can see that.

And you can put it down.

I'm not here to fight.

I'm here for the Author's pen.

You should be warned, lad...

That pen is a dangerous thing.

I know all about it.

And I don't care.

I care.

I have fought many a battle protecting it,

some of which have cost me a great deal.

But I will not relinquish it

to anyone other than a True Author.

And there hasn't been one of those in this realm

for a very long time.

I'm not from this realm.

Look, it's a long and complicated story,

but basically, in another land,

I am the True Author.

Now, I need my pen,

so whatever test you have to put me through

to figure that out, do it.

As you wish.

[HEART BEATS]

[HEART b*ating]

That is indeed a complicated story.

The timelines alone,

they make one's head spin.

Only a True Author would weave such a tale.

So, what? So, that's the test?

It is.

You see, every story an Author has ever written

lives in his heart.

You have done good work.

Could use a little more romance, perhaps, but...

maybe in your next book.

So then I passed?

It is an honor to meet you.

Likewise.

So. Where's the pen?

In its rightful place.

Look to your hand.

Thank you.

I noticed you haven't
written in quite some time.

So I must remind you...

The Author's true job is to record the stories,

not to create them.

So no matter how many stories you have already written,

you must choose each time how you will use the pen.

Choose wisely...

Henry.

Ugh!

Finally.

It's filthy in here, and Dalmatian is a bitch to clean.

Try a dry cleaners.

I'm not gonna let you out,

but you do have something I need.

This pen requires a special kind of ink

that's pretty hard to find.

But I happen to know the one place it still exists.

[WIND BLOWING]

No.

No!

No, no, no, no, no!

No!

[GROANING]

[SOBBING]

Ohhh!

I will skin you alive for this!

RUMPLESTILTSKIN: I'll take that.

And that.

You see?

Press the right buttons,

and anyone will do what you want.

Even the Truest Believer.

You were after the pen.

Plot twist.

Well, whatever you have planned, it won't work.

Only the Author can use it.

And I don't care what you do to me.

I'll never write a word for you.

- [GASPS]
- But I will.

Hello, Henry.

You're...

you're Wish Realm Me.

Surprised?

There's versions of other characters.

Why shouldn't there be two of us?

If you're any version of me,

you should know that this is wrong.

I am you.

Except for one difference.

None of my wishes ever came true.

You made a deal with him.

Well, it's what I do.

When you said I wouldn't get my happy ending

without your help, you weren't talking about me.

You were talking about him.

Po-tay-toh. Po-tat-toh.

How could you do this?

I tried finding my happiness the right way,

but I got desperate.

Looks like you did, too.

And now that we've gotten to know each other,

what do you say, Henries?

I think it's time we started a new story.

Mine.

Oh, God.

Henry.

Your Majesty.

It's been a while since you k*lled my grandparents

with your bare hands.

Back to try and finish off the family?

Oh, no, no, no, no. That wasn't...

Such pain. Such anger. I'm riveted.

Aren't you riveted?

No.

The Author's pen.

How?

I screwed up, big-time.

Hook, I'm sorry I hit you.

Mom, I'm just...

I'm sorry.

What's he gonna write?

Look, whatever deal you made with him,

you do not have to honor it.

Trust me, there's always a loophole.

And I'll help you find it.

Why would I break a deal that's gonna give me what I want?

Smart boy.

And now we must attend to my humble needs.

We have immortality and power, you and I,

and you want to throw it all away for both of us

just to get to Belle.

Well, I'm afraid, in the stroke of a pen, Dearie,

I'm gonna make sure you never see her again.

Don't do this.

We can help you.

This isn't the right path for you.

- You know that.
- [WHOOSH]

Take a letter, boy.

It goes something like this.

"The powers of the Guardian"...

No. No, no, no.

"are no more."

Done.

Well written.

My eternity feels eternal again.

Oh, oh, oh!

And now...

enjoy a taste of winter in your tiny prison.

Henry! Where'd they go?

I reunited Henry and the others with his family.

Bound to be quite the reunion.

Then why am I still here?

Because we're finally back to what I'm getting out of this.

I watched you crush my grandparents' hearts

and take away my mom.

And that story still needs its ending.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

Oh, look.

There's a one-bedroom right here in the Heights.

Oh, it looks pretty good in the pictures. See?

I don't need to see it.

I love it.

If it comes with a built-in Margot, that's all I need.

Aww. [SMOOCHES]

[GASPS] Uh...

Tilly! Are you okay?

What's wrong?

I don't know.

- Something's changed.
- What?

My father and the others, they're...

they're in danger.

Something's wrong in the Wish Realm.

- Are you sure?
- Yeah. We have to go.

They need our help.

I'm sorry.

There's not enough beignet magic in the world

to open a portal.

No, you must have something.

Maybe, as queen...

you can help us find some magic?

Right.

Queen. [SIGHS]

[BREATHES DEEPLY]

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

Folks. Please listen.

Our people, o-our friends are in trouble and...

[CONVERSATIONS CONTINUE]

Hey! Everyone, listen up.

These two young women are known to many of you.

They need to get to the Wish Realm to help others,

perhaps even save lives.

You may not feel that you can help, but...

I think you can.

You may have a pair of silver slippers

or a magic hat or a bean,

something you haven't thought of in years.

Find it.

Your realm needs you.

Your queen needs you.

[SIGHS]

REMY: Your Majesty?

Remy?

Do you have something?

Years ago, before the curse,

I was preparing a cassoulet,

and I found this.

A magic bean.

I-I hid it in case I ever needed it,

but after what you just said, I want you to have it.

Thank you.

- Do you want to come with us?
- Ah, no, thank you.

I should stay here and watch over my people.

These are some strange times,

and they need their queen right now.

No, no curtsies or bows.

[LAUGHING] Come on.

[LAUGHTER]

All right.

Thanks for the loan of the truck.

Good luck in the other realm.

Thanks. We may need it.

But we're gonna make a quick stop first.

Where? Where are you going?

To get help from some friends.