02x13 - Zane Vs. Zane

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Suits". Aired: June 2011 to September 2019.*
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On the run from a drug deal gone bad, Mike Ross, a brilliant college-dropout, finds himself a job working with Harvey Specter, one of New York City's best lawyers.
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02x13 - Zane Vs. Zane

Post by bunniefuu »

Previously on...

Suits

We just went through a civil w*r, and the world knows it.

You're using privileged information to target our clients.

Pearson Hardman is falling apart.

I never thought you'd betray your own firm.

I did nothing wrong.

Jesus!

You're the guy that nobody wants but we can't get rid of.

You order me to rescind an offer due to a firm-wide hiring freeze.

Two minutes later, you hire a fifth-year.

Katrina Bennett.

I need you to waive my non-compete so I can take a position at another firm.

You went to Louis?

He didn't betray us, Harvey.

He found the problem.

You may have fended off this att*ck, but we're not the only ones circling.

We fended you off, we'll fend off the rest.

I want my name on the door.

Nice!

Ugh!

H-o-r-s.

That means you get an "e," you lose.

Thank you. I can spell.

Too bad you can't sh**t.

Crumpled paper.

Winners don't blame the ball or the rim or the wind speed in a closed-off room.

The fan was on.

Excuses don't win championships.

Oh, yeah? Did Michael Jordan tell you that?

No. I told him.

Come on. All right.

That was going in. We're in the middle of a game!

If you two are playing horse, then one of you needs to thank me.

Thank you.

Pussies. Out.

Would you like to finish this game?

Winner gets to be name partner.

See, that's funny because you're already name partner--

Derek Portis d*ed this weekend.

What took him so long?

Harvey.

What?

He lived a long life. He was an old man.

He was 56.

Didn't look a day under 70.

Man dies, and the first thing you think to say is that he looked older than he was.

No. That's the first thing I said.

The first thing I thought to say was, "dead or alive, Derek is a d*ck."

A d*ck that convinced Folsom Foods to settle with us for $10 million.

Well, we'll just have to tell his replacement the settlement needs a signature.

It's not gonna be that easy.

Why? Who's replacing him?

I'm gonna have the cornish hen, and we're gonna start with the foie gras special, two of them.

You're gonna love it. Just one.

I'm okay. Thank you. Dad.

I'm watching what I eat.

On my birthday?

[Chuckles]

I'm trying to be disciplined.

Listen...

I'm taking a case against Pearson Hardman.

It's Folsom Foods. Do you know it?

Um, of course. It's the gender-discrimination case.

Well, I wanted to give a chance to get off it, if you were on it. Well, I'm not, but okay.

It's just that I know you keep a low profile at work.

That was supposed to be between me and mom.

Well, I wish you could tell me these things, and I wish that you didn't keep the fact that I was your father a secret.

It's not a secret. I just don't broadcast it.

People treat me differently once they find out you're my dad.

Are you worried that they're judging you for being a paralegal?

No, Dad.

Only you judge me for being a paralegal.

I do not judge you.

It doesn't matter.

I'm not planning on being a paralegal forever.

[Laughs]

I know.

Right there.

You can't even pretend to believe I have what it takes to be a lawyer.

Rachel, you are a beautiful woman, and you can do whatever you want.

Beautiful, not smart.

Honey, I am trying to give you a heads-up.

And you're taking the whole thing as an indictment.

Do you believe I have what it takes to be a lawyer?

It's been five years, and...

It hasn't happened.

I just wonder if you've considered trying something else.

Of all days--

"Hey, Rachel, how was your birthday?" "Great. My dad told me that I should aim lower."

Please, Rachel, that is not what I meant.

Let's just have lunch. No, Dad.

Really, I wouldn't want you to overeat on the day that you told me that I won't amount to anything.

Rachel.

Hi.

Excuse me.

But I think you might be in the wrong office.

Oh, I'm in the right office.

You're Katrina Bennett, Harvey's mysterious new hire.

I'm afraid that puts me at a disadvantage, because I don't know who you are.

That's our problem right there.

We have a problem?

Oh, yeah, a big one.

You haven't come to see me yet.

Again, I don't know who you--

I oversee the first-

and second-year associates.

It's a responsibility that I take as seriously as holding the nuclear launch codes in my hands.

Well, if you take it so seriously, then why are you in a fifth-year associate's office, trimming your fingernails at her desk?

Trimming?

This is a gold-plated nickel alloy cuticle sculptor from the south of Denmark, and I will sculpt my nails wherever I damn well please.

Why don't we see what you're up to?

That's password-protected.

Please. Prosecutor99... third try.

That's a violation of my privacy.

Oh, yeah? Who are you gonna tell?

[Keys clacking]

I see you're representing Chad Ritter.

And this is your defense? Wow, it's like you're a baboon.

I'm in full control of Mr. Ritter's defense strategy.

It's not a strategy, it's a prayer, which is why I'm going to be forced to supervise you.

I don't need a babysitter.

You're not getting a babysitter.

You're getting Louis Litt. This is unacceptable.

Be that as it may, you can either welcome my tutelage, or you can crawl back to the D.A.'s office from whence you came.

Welcome to Pearson Hardman.

You got a minute?

Maybe.

It's not about us. It's about work.

Oh. Then, yeah.

Folsom Foods--

Missy Dietler's your paralegal on it, right?

Yeah, when she's not texting her boyfriend every five seconds or her roommate, like, every other five seconds.

Put me on instead.

[Chuckles]

No.

I don't think that's a good idea.

The new opposing counsel is my dad.

Your dad is Robert Zane?

Is it so hard to believe that my father's black?

Robert Zane is black?

You think this is a year-round tan?

I know who you are, but I can't believe that your father is the Robert Zane and you never said anything to me.

I don't like people here knowing.

Oh, and I'm just "people"?

[Sighs]

I mean, before, with the--okay.

Look, I'm offering to help you kick his ass.

Are you gonna make room for me or not?

Before I answer that question, do you really think it's a good idea for you and I to work together?

Are you really asking me what is or isn't a good idea?

Wow.

Look out, Robert Zane.

♪ See the money, wanna stay for your meal ♪
♪ get another piece of pie for your wife ♪
♪ everybody wanna know how it feel ♪
♪ everybody wanna see what it's like ♪
♪ living in a beehive of your mind ♪
♪ me and missus so busy, busy making money ♪
♪ all right

♪ all that time imagine this ♪
♪ Suits 2x13 ♪

Zane vs. Zane

Original Air Date on January 31, 2013

♪ the greenback boogie

First of all Robert, I'm sorry to hear about Derek Portis.

Oh, I appreciate your condolences, Harvey, but the fact is, Derek was a d*ck.

[Laughing]

That's what I said.

That's what everybody says.

In any case, you didn't need to come all the way over here.

We could've faxed you that settlement.

Here you go, sir.

You and I both know I didn't come over here to sign.

I came to negotiate.

To renegotiate, which is bad faith.

The fact is you snookered Derek. 10 million is double what any competent attorney would've settled for.

Should have been 5. I'll give you 2.

Great. Let's settle for 2.

Then I'll get you the keys to my condo, and maybe you'll drop a deuce on my pillow.

Does it have a security code? Doorman?

[Laughter]

Okay, you've had your fun.

But we're not taking that offer.

Then when would you like to schedule Sloane Moseley's deposition?

But you can't re-depose her, Mr. Zane.

Yes, he can.

And you'll use this opportunity to show Sloane Moseley what she's in for.

When I get done with her, she's gonna jump at the 2 million.

That's more than bad faith. That's just cruel.

My offer stands.

Uh, it was nice to meet you, sir.

What? "Sir"? "Mr. Zane"?

Why don't you just call him "dad" and get it over with?

I was showing respect.

You're trying to get invited to Thanksgiving dinner.

You think he'd let me have one of the turkey legs?

I don't think that's what you're wanting him to let you have.

You think I didn't notice that Rachel Zane just became the paralegal?

She asked to be on it.

This better not end up with you in bed with her telling her your secret. Not a problem.

We'll do it on the couch.

Wow. that was not respectful to you, me, or her.

Or her father.

Or your couch.

Not my couch.

[Elevator bell dings]

Donna.

Katrina.

You know who I am?

I know who everybody is.

That's what I've heard. Do you have a minute?

Well, eight days from now, I think I got a spare 45 seconds.

Well, if you get a break...

You think I can be bought with cookies?

Homemade, chocolate chip.

Dark chocolate?

Semisweet.

A dollop of peanut butter?

Butterscotch.

Walnuts?

Please.

Pistachios.

The nut of royalty.

Who told you my weak spot--Mike?

Bertha.

Big Bertha from the D.A.'s office?

You're remembered fondly there.

Aw, yeah.

I'm remembered fondly everywhere.

[Sighs]

Okay, you got one minute.

Who the hell is Louis Litt?

This might take more than a minute.

How bad?

I'd like to throw him through a plateglass window.

Not a totally unprecedented reaction.

Harvey brought me in, so I don't want to piss him off.

I just want to know what the protocol is.

Harvey won't stand in your way, but you listen to me.

You want to go toe-to-toe with Louis, you better be prepared to go the distance.

Jessica.

Robert.

What can I do for you?

I just want to talk, one name partner to another.

I want you to settle Folsom Foods.

I thought we were already settling Folsom Foods.

I proposed a slightly different number.

Which Harvey already said no to.

Well, you know me.

I don't go for that gender-discrimination stuff, but Harvey negotiates like a girl.

[Laughs]

No, he doesn't.

But he does style his hair like one.

[Laughs]

I know.

What the hell is that?

[Muttering]

I don't know. What's your number? 2 million.

That's an $8 million hit.

It's 8 million to your client, and you need a win.

Do I?

Yeah, it's no secret that Pearson Hardman's been taking it on the chin since Daniel left.

Well, that might mean something if I had a glass jaw.

Partners have jumped ship, associates were poached, clients have bailed.

Partners were pushed, associates were fired, and clients were retained.

Well, you can spin it all you want.

But a high-profile win... that sure would look good.

If I lower my price.

A win's a win. It doesn't matter how ugly.

Robert Zane poked his nose into my office.

He try and hit on you? I think he's always had a thing.

Who doesn't?

He thinks we're weak. I know.

He pulled the settlement.

Not on the case--us.

Are you saying he went over my head?

He heard about Allison Holt's bullshit last week.

Let me guess.

He's pulling the same bullshit right now.

Told me the world knows we need a win, tried to leverage that to get me to settle.

Son of a bitch.

That's not bad faith. That's below the belt.

You know what I do to someone who hits me below the belt.

Cut 'em off at the knees.

[Juicer whirring]

Louis.

[Juicer continues whirring]

I just need--

I just--

[whirring slows]

[Juicer turns off]

Yeah.

Looks delicious. What is that?

It's a spinach and kale power smoothie.

I'm in the middle of my quarterly cleanse.

What do you want?

To apologize... for any misunderstanding we might have had.

That you might have had.

I had. And it was huge.

I looked up your record.

You're a white-collar genius.

Go on.

I don't just accept your tutelage.

I'm begging for your help.

Well, beg away.

My motion to dismiss is Wednesday with Judge McIntyre.

I've never been able to connect with him.

Yeah, that's 'cause you don't understand him.

Well, all I know is he's punitive.

No, he's a stickler.

Don't be late, don't be sloppy, don't be disrespectful, and he'll love you, just like he loves me.

Since you know him so well, would you do me the honor of signing on as first chair?

I can.

And I will.

You've forgiven me with grace, and now you're saving me in my hour of need.

You're my knight in shining armor.

Ah.

[Chuckles]

I will see-eth you on Wednesday, milady.

[Laughs]

[Clears throat, sighs]

Um...

[Clears throat]

You wanted to see me?

Yes, but usually that means the person tells Donna they're here.

Then Donna tells me. That's how it works.

Donna's not there.

You think that's by accident?

Apparently not.

You know why you're here?

Because my last name is Zane.

You know why Donna isn't?

Because you know we're friends.

And you're about to ask me to do something that she would tell me not to do.

And what exactly do I want to ask you?

You want to know if I want to be in on the deposition.

You did ask on the case.

Yes, I did.

And before you ask me if I'm tough enough to be in there, I want you to know that I am tough enough.

That's not what I wanted to ask.

I want you to know if you think it'll rattle your father.

Frankly, I don't think he'd care.

Good.

Why good?

Because if that's what you think about him, then your relationship is worse than you think, and he cares about you more than you know.

Is this a joke?

She doesn't need to be in there.

Sloane Moseley?

You know who I'm talking about.

You think having her in the room is gonna keep me from doing my job?

The relevant question is, what is she gonna think about you after you eviscerate Sloane Moseley?

You accuse me of being cruel, and you orchestrate this stunt.

We had a deal. You pulled it.

Put the deal back on the table, this whole thing ends now.

Harvey, what did you do?

My job.

Miss Moseley... why did you choose this particular field?

Because I have a love of food.

Is it really a requirement of excellence in an executive that one love food?

It's not a requirement, but it's a food company, and it's what I thought made it a perfect fit.

Well, if it was such a perfect fit, why were you looking for a job in another field?

Because I spent nine years k*lling myself for your client and got passed over for promotion after promotion in favor of less-qualified men.

Okay, let me get this straight.

So you hit a wall, you blame my client, and rather than figuring out what it takes to make it in this perfect fit, you give up and fold like a house of cards.

I don't know what law school you went to, but I was always taught that depositions require questions.

I went to Harvard.

And here's your question.

After all these interviews for all these jobs, why didn't you just pursue one of them and switch careers?

It would require a step backward.

Isn't it true it didn't require a step backward?

But that's all you could find, cause no one thought you were any good at the job you had in the first place.

You don't know that.

I have sworn testimony from a headhunter who said nobody wanted you.

Okay, you're badgering her.

Well, the truth is you're untalented and pathetic and blaming other people because you don't have the skills or the fortitude or anything else to make it in your chosen field.

And you don't even have the courage to try something else.

I'm sorry. I just wanted to make sure that the court reporter got all that.

Did you hear it down there?

We heard it.

Good.

I have a few more questions.

No.

This deposition is over.

This is the men's room. You know that, right?

Don't do that sh*t again.

Excuse me?

I don't need your protection.

That's what my dad does.

Rachel, the only thing your father and I have in common is that you're angry at both of us.

Well, all you did in there was embarrass me.

Embarrass you?

I wasn't even watching you. I was watching our client.

You're trying to say you didn't call that off because of him?

No, I'm trying to say I didn't call it off because of you, even though evidently you went to Harvey to ask in to make it about you.

I didn't go to Harvey. He came to me.

Look, Rachel, you might want to make this Zane versus Zane, but it's not.

It's Folsom Foods versus our client.

But you're so eager to prove how tough you are that you seem to have forgotten about her.

How dare you?

How dare I what?

I just got a $3,000 fine from Judge McIntyre for missing my own hearing.

I know.

I was wondering what happened to you.

I thought maybe your horse took fever, my liege.

Uhhuh.

You said it was Wednesday, and you know it.

No. I said Tuesday... as is confirmed in the documents I gave you.

This here is a fight you don't want to have.

I didn't pick it.

Yeah, you did.

And now you're gonna pay that fine, and you're gonna write a letter expressing how sorry you are to Judge McIntyre.

No. I'm not.

I'm gonna count to five.

You can count to 500.

The only thing I'm sorry for is getting stuck with you.

You lied to me... and you know it.

Oh, yeah?

Who you gonna tell?

Here it comes. Speech number 162--

14 reasons why I'm an assh*le.

No, no. This is gonna be 216.

That's uncharted territory.

And you're still not gonna like it.

If it's coming from you, that goes without saying.

Look, I'm just saying that you went out of your way to put Rachel in that deposition.

You promised uncharted territory.

We've been here before.

No, usually you're accusing me of making things personal.

But this time you're making things personal for Robert Zane.

No. He made it personal.

And how exactly did he do that?

He threatened our firm.

And on top of that, he tried to show Sloane Moseley what she'd be in for her if this goes to trial.

So I'm just returning the favor.

Yeah, well, it didn't seem to have much of an effect on him.

Trust me. It will.

And did you think about the effect it'll have on Sloane Moseley, not to mention his daughter?

Here we are, right back to good old 162.

Did you misunderstand me when I said to cut Robert Zane off at the knees?

You too?

Oh, don't tell me you think I went too far.

I don't think you went far enough.

What?

Your client just called.

She wants to take Zane's bullshit settlement.

You're gonna want to turn your hips to transfer your weight through the ball.

Nice job tracking me down.

You think you're the only one who knows where Judge Benjamin plays?

No.

But I'm the only one here he plays with.

Now, did you come here to caddie for me?

I came here to negotiate.

Bullshit.

Your client caved after that deposition, because she knew she couldn't make it through a trial.

So I'm gonna negotiate for you.

The offer on the table was 2 million.

It just went down to one. Robert.

Now it's 500,000.

You're pretty good at this.

Remind me to have you buy my next car for me.

Now it's 100,000.

No, wait.

Here.

No one wins if we go to w*r.

You don't have children, do you?

You came to my house and threatened my firm. "Your house"?

You put my little girl in that deposition so she could see me shred that woman, which I did because that's my job.

And I was trying to protect that woman.

That was my job.

Well, your client is scared shitless.

So I guess that means that I did my job a lot better than you did yours.

The settlement is gone.

You want something... you come take it at trial.
What do you need?

A napkin.

No social security number, date of birth, favorite color, allergy to nuts... I don't know.

What's it gonna take?

I don't think I need to steal your father's identity just yet.

Mike said he pulled the settlement, and we can't let that happen. "We"?

Yes, "we."

I work here too.

Now I get it.

Get--

No, no, no. This isn't about me and my father.

This is about the client.

No, I meant why Donna likes you so much.

Oh.

Thank you. I-I like her too.

You know what?

I was gonna give in and drop this case.

But now that you accosted me during my me time, I'm gonna change my mind and do what you say.

You were gonna continue with it anyway.

Yes.

Right.

Would you like to eat my bagel now too?

Oh, thank you. I...

[Laughs]

I'm so sorry.

Thank you.

Hi.

What are you doing here?

I just came by to tell you that you were right.

This is your case, not mine.

I'm no longer first chair.

Fine. We're best friends.

Now please leave.

Okay, I came to give you your files back.

All rise.

No way. I wasn't born yesterday.

I've got my files right here.

Okay, Katrina, I'm offering us both a way out here.

You keep whatever's in those files the hell away from me.

Okay. You got me.

I'm not to be trusted. All right, let's get to it.

Ms. Bennett, I believe you have something for me.

Your Honor, Mr. Gibbs charged my client with securities fraud, but he neglected to disclose discrepancies between the S.E.C.'S findings and the IRS's.

I have with me an exhibit.

I'm sorry.

You must've accidentally somehow gotten the file of pictures of me photoshopped as various American presidents.

I actually like that one.

I look pretty sharp, don't I?

What you're really looking for was this...

[Patting folder]

like I offered.

But per your request, I'm gonna keep it the hell away from you.

Is this some sort of joke?

No. Your Honor.

Bring that folder up here right now.

And if they're not legitimate court documents, you are in for one hell of a fine.

Uh...

What are you working on?

I'm going through the reviews for every executive promoted at Folsom Foods for the last five years.

You?

Reviews of every executive promoted at Folsom Foods for the past five years.

[Both chuckles]

You were right.

This is not Zane versus Zane.

And I don't want to talk about my dad anymore.

Good.

It's like he was sitting me down and looking me in the eye and telling me... What?

That I'm untalented and pathetic and don't have the skills or the fortitude or anything else it takes to make it in my chosen field.

He was talking to a client.

You got a 172. You're going to law school.

He can't deny that.

Yeah. He--he doesn't know that.

Rachel, you--

[sighs]

When I, um... told him that I was high-school salutatorian...

Guess what the first words out of his mouth were.

He wanted to know who the valedictorian was.

Nope.

He said... "Number two ain't bad."

He thought it was funny.

Everyone's always said that my mom is beautiful and that my dad is smart and powerful.

And all I've ever wanted is for him...

He's never gonna see a different side of you if you don't show him a different side of you.

He knew I was sitting right there.

You chose to be sitting right there.

[Knock on door]

Louis.

Hi, Donna.

What can I do for you?

Not for me.

For Katrina.

Which one's Katrina again?

Okay, you know what?

You've had your fun. Time to let it go.

Yeah, I'm afraid I'm not gonna let anything go until that woman kneels before Zod.

First of all, you know who Zod is?

And second of all, you think you're Zod?

General Zod was a visionary leader who was underappreciated by his entire planet.

Of course I know who he is.

Okay, well, Katrina isn't Superman, so what the hell do you want from her?

Okay. I get it.

Harvey is Superman, and he hired Katrina, instead of you getting your first-year.

Her name was Maria, and this is not about that.

What this is about is me getting respect from a new employee, so...

You b*at her. You want her respect?

Make up with her and leave her alone.

Oh, really, Donna? Is that a sign of respect?

Leaving someone alone, like you and Harvey left me alone since Daniel?

Louis, Harvey welcomed you back. "Welcomed"?

He ripped up my letter of resignation, and he didn't say a word.

Louis.

You know what?

Over the years, all the ribbing and all the practical jokes between you and Harvey--

I found that to be a sign of respect.

But you haven't had one conversation with me since you told me you never wanted to see my smug face again.

So you know what? You go tell Katrina that I'm not really in a forgiving mood.

I had an idea about Folsom Foods.

You too?

What?

You are not getting my bagel.

Why would I want your bagel?

Never mind. What do you got?

I checked the review of every promotion from the last five years.

Every time they don't promote a woman, they use some combination of the same 16 words.

And the men?

No.

What are the words? "High-strung, sensitive, aggressive, abrasive..."

Coded language.

They went out of their way to shield themselves from any one person bringing a gender-discrimination suit, which means they treated all of them the same.

As a class.

Yeah. And guess how many. 113 female employees across all 22 divisions... you know what they have in common?

All denied promotions due to the fact that they're women, not that they're untalented or pathetic or lack the fortitude to excel in their chosen field.

This is a crock of sh*t.

You didn't want to settle for 2 million.

You'll be lucky to settle for 200 million.

Robert, play all the golf you want.

Judge Benjamin isn't gonna get you out of this one.

How we doing today, boys?

[Metal detector beeps]

Sir, need you to step over here, please.

Easy, Batman. I left my belt on.

Well, if it's okay with you, I'm gonna break out my trusty bat metal detector.

[Metal detector beeps]

Sir, we need you to raise your arms above your head, please.

Okay, and I'm gonna need your badge number.

How did those get there?

Sir, this is a w*apon.

A w*apon?

They're my nail scissors, you assh*le.

They're gold-plated. They cost $2,000.

You're gonna bring a $2,000

w*apon into my courthouse?

I'm just saying I don't know even how they got there.

Oh, well, maybe the Riddler put them there.

Okay, that's very funny. I'm just saying... maybe it was, like, a big misunderstanding.

You say you don't know whose those are?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. Okay. I'm sorry.

Okay, let's just start over.

I'm just gonna need them back.

Ow!

I'm placing you under arrest for carrying a concealed w*apon into a courthouse in the state of New York and for assaulting an officer of the court.

What?

Hey, Eddie.

Hey, Ms. Bennett. Nice to see you again.

How are Shelly and the kids?

Oh, they're doing great.

You know, I mean... you know, she's... yeah. No, they're doing great. Thanks for asking.

It was her!

You think I don't know that?

I always loved that picture.

Me too.

Tryouts for the school play.

Minnie Mouse.

I want to talk about the deposition.

Rachel, you and I cannot talk about the case.

I said the deposition, not the case.

I don't give a sh*t about the case.

Then why did you take it?

Because you took me out for my birthday and told me you were picking a fight with my family and said, "Sit it out, little girl. You can't handle this."

Do you know why I love that picture?

Because I'm still your little girl.

Because you were happy.

You remember what happened at those tryouts?

Yeah. I didn't get the part.

And it k*lled you.

I was a child.

And most children let things go.

But you never tried out for a play again.

I did other things.

But why aren't you doing other things now?

I am watching you fail and stall and b*at yourself up.

And it rips me up inside.

I took the LSATs.

I got a 172.

When?

Six weeks ago.

And you're just telling me now.

[Scoffs] I didn't want to hear some joke about your 177.

Ah, but--

When we were in that room, I know you were talking to her, but it was like you were aiming everything right at me.

And then I thought, "you know what?

Maybe you look at all of us that way."

Rachel.

Well, we're not all the same.

And you need to toughen up because I am not that little girl anymore.

So who's gonna kneel before Zod now?

I'm not kneeling before anybody, let alone the person who framed me and put me in this jail cell.

You humiliated me with Judge McIntyre.

Oh, please. You did the same thing.

Missing an appearance is different from looking like a buffoon in open court.

I gave you a way out, so don't come crying to me.

r*pist, m*rder*r... these are the kinds of people I'm used to dealing with.

And you know where they are?

Spending the rest of their lives realizing that I wasn't just a pretty face.

Is that what you think this is about?

You treated me like sh*t because I'm a woman.

How dare you? I worship women.

My mother, my grandmother... God rest her soul--

Hillary Clinton, Gwen Stefani.

Then what the hell is your problem?

You took a job from somebody who deserved it more.

I went to resubmit my motion to dismiss.

Turns out judge McIntyre already received it... from me.

The client needed it, and you wrote it.

For me to put my signature on it would just be wrong.

Well, it worked.

Are you ready to call a truce?

Are you gonna frame me for m*rder if I say no?

Not as long as you keep these in your own office.

Robert.

What a coincidence seeing you here.

It's not a coincidence.

I didn't think it was.

I got to give it to your man Harvey.

He comes full throttle.

He has his pros and cons.

They all do.

Did you bring your checkbook?

Thank you. I brought this.

You're going to decertify our class?

I'm gonna bust it wide open.

You see, after you brought my daughter to that deposition, I realized not all women are the same.

No way this gets busted up into 113 cases.

I'd say a minimum of 45.

Some you may win, some you may lose, all of which are gonna drain your resources.

You're threatening me again.

I have another option.

Which is what?

I told you... not all women are the same.

[Laughs]

You got to be kidding me. "Not all women are the same." What the hell does that mean?

He wants to merge.

What?

Pearson Zane.

No. No way. I'm not doing that.

Oh, excuse me?

We didn't fight off Hardman to end up here.

Well, you went after the man's daughter, which is what put us here.

You told me to cut him off at the knees.

If you're gonna go that low to put someone down, then you better make damn sure that they don't get back up.

It doesn't matter if it's Robert or not.

They're gonna keep coming.

Until I put your name on the door.

That's not what this is about.

We can only take these hits for so long.

Death by a thousand cuts.

[Scoffs]

All right.

Well, if they're gonna keep coming, then we may as well just make it one big brawl.

Jessica. What a coincidence.

Skip it.

I'm guessing by your tone that our merger is off the table?

It was never on the table.

What's this?

A press release. "Female head of major law firm "is going to the ends of the earth to fight 45 cases of gender discrimination."

This is bullshit.

Look at me.

You'll cr*pple your firm.

I would rather lose my firm than get married staring down the barrel of a shotgun.

You're not gonna be able to have my daughter in every deposition.

This is 45 cases.

And it will cost you 45 times the amount that you could settle for right here.

Yeah, I know you.

The chess master... you think you're Bobby Fischer.

This isn't chess. It's dominoes.

Now, the first case might be tough.

But after that, one by one...

And when it's all said and done, I'll be the last one standing, holding a big, fat check in my hand.

Remind me to get the papers ready for, uh, the deposition tomorrow, the 19th.

Uh, that would... holy sh*t.

Who the hell did this?

All right, Norma, if you're gonna keep letting people into this office like this, then what the hell good are you?

Oh, yeah, wait.

And by the way, remind me to buy socks for next week.

I'm running low.

I got to admit, you do look kind of hot as a bad boy.

You tell me right now this was not Katrina Bennett, 'cause this is not a truce. Oh, please.

Katrina had nothing to do with this.

Then this was you?

No.

Harvey?

You're not lying.

Nope.

Does this mean that you and I are good?

No.

Not yet.

Bye, Louis.

Wait, don't go.

We're back!

No, we're not.

Oh, sh*t.

[Knock on door]

Hey.

Hey.

I'm dropping the case.

Why?

Because I never should have taken it in the first place.

Dad.

You said it yourself.

I picked a fight with your family, told you to sit it out, and those aren't words a man should ever hear from... from his daughter.

You're not tough enough?

Not even close.

[Laughs]

Well, we never finished our lunch.

Tomorrow?

Tomorrow.

But we'll have to pick a new place.

I already tried that foie gras of yours.

You did?

Yep.

And?

It tasted like ass.

Come on.

[Laughs]

[Chuckles]

Looks like you guys made up.

It's a start.

I didn't want to interrupt, and I know I'm a few days late, but...

Is that my--

Your LSAT score?

Yeah. I figured...

You shouldn't keep things like this a secret.

Thanks, Mike.

Happy Birthday.

How did you know it was my birthday?

Oh, right. I must have told you once.

You did, yeah. I mean, I forgot.

Yeah, this is from Donna.

[Imitating Robert]

Come on.

That is exac--

I just saw that.

[Laughs]

Yeah, that's how fast I am.

You're impressed. It's no big deal.

How did it go down?

Did you tell him if he puts one of ours in the hospital, we put one of his in the morgue?

No, Harvey. I did not quote The Untouchables to the man.

You should've, you stinkin' Irish pig.

That's really funny, you lying member of a no-good--

Robert.

Oh, I hate to interrupt in the middle of a Untouchables quote fest.

Two doors down, they're doing Steel Magnolias.

You'd fit right in.

I'm more of a Beaches man myself.

I assume you're here to settle.

I'm afraid not.

I wanted to tell you that my firm has a conflict of interest, so I decided to farm out the case.

Whose ass are we gonna kick now?

Actually, an old classmate of mine.

Let me guess...

Daniel Hardman.
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