11x03 - Hail Mary

[bunniefuu]

[TYPING.]

[SIGHS.]

[BEEPS, CLICKS.]

[BEEPS, CLICKS.]

[ELEVATOR BELL CHIMES.]

[MUZAK PLAYING.]

Hold, please.

Hi.

Thank you.

Sure.

Which floor?

One, please.

- You work on seven?

- Yes.

I find this on seven.

You know this person?

[ELECTRICAL CRACKLING.]

[GRUNTS.]

[ELEVATOR BELL CHIMES.]

How you doing?

You use a cell phone.

What's that got to do with anything?

You send e-mails instead of letters.

You send texts instead of phone calls.

You use an app instead of cash.

Most of the aspects of your modern life have been digitized.

All the more reason to do something the old-fashioned way.

What are you afraid of?

I'm not afraid of anything.

I-I just think it's unnatural.

I get it.

A lot of people have a fear of the unknown, especially as they're getting older.

Oh.

Leave it to a mathlete to think that an-an algorithm is better at dating than they are.

Oh, no, no, no, I'm not talking about me.

Let's be honest, G.

Joelle, Anna, Iliana, Akiko.

How could it do worse?

Number one, you cannot count Akiko.

Okay?

Her boss put a contract out on my head.

That doesn't mean she had to collect on it.

And two, you of all people should know that the more complicated an algorithm, the greater likelihood of human error.

Hey, cease-fire.

Speaking of human error.

ERIC: Okay, I just got a frantic call from Hetty.

- Where is she?

- Uh, don't know, don't matter.

Well, a little bit.

Maybe a little.

I Anyway, not important.

What is important is that Hetty approved a request from Admiral Kilbride.

He wants us to provide a protection detail for a current operation.

- What's the operation?

- Uh, he wouldn't say.

- Who are we protecting?

- ERIC: He didn't say.

SAM: Well, what would he say?

Uh, well, he gave me an address for a hotel room downtown and a room number.

All right, when does he want us?

ERIC: Now.

- Now?

- Now.

Like, now, now.

Like, as in, like, he's waiting for you now.

Oh, and he said wear suits.

[CLICKS TONGUE.]

[KNOCKING ON DOOR.]

Apparently, "urgent" doesn't mean the same thing it did when I was your age.

[CHUCKLES.]

We literally just found out.

I guess "literally" doesn't mean the same thing, either.

What's going on, Admiral?

Who are we protecting?

- Me.

- You?

You have a problem with that?

Of course not.

Who are we protecting you from?

I don't know yet.

NELL: This makes no sense.

Why would Hetty approve our involvement without telling us what we're involved in?

Why does Hetty do half the things she does?

It's not the first time.

It's not the first hundred.

True, but one of the things she's good at is protecting us, and that usually involves providing us with enough information to do so.

I got the feeling that this whole thing is unraveling in real time.

Which is why we need the 411.

Beale, I am an intelligence analyst.

I can't analyze if I ain't got the intel, you dig?

Okay, I dig, Gidget.

Look, we'll get the sitrep once the team gets on the scene.

All right?

How do you think I feel?

I'm a technical operator.

Senior technical operator.

Senior technical operator.

Thank you very much.

- You're welcome.

- And I can't technically operate without knowing all, uh, the oper the operations technic Well Let me try this again.

Yeah.

[CLEARS THROAT.]

My skills as, uh, an operat uh, someone who technically operates can't is KENSI [OVER COMM.] : Can't operate without knowing the technicalities.

- NELL: There it is.

- ERIC: Blye for the win.

- Mm-hmm.

- You guys online?

Yeah.

Unfortunately.

But in solidarity, I'm a detective who finds it hard to detect unless I understand what it is I'm detectiving.

The word is "detecting.

" There's no such thing as "detectiving," Sherlock.

Uh, wrong.

The word "detective" actually comes from the Latin word detectivus Uh which means to uncover through deductive means.

And then that was translated into Old English about 135 years later, and that became "detectiving.

" So, Special Agent Kensi Blye Is not buying into your BS, so excuse me.

You're wearing a suit?

Did you know he was gonna wear a suit?

No one told me there would be a dress code.

- You coming in?

- Oh, yeah.

I'm coming in.

Whoa.

Why do I feel like I'm about to be pitched a timeshare opportunity?

Stop talking, start listening.

Agents Callen and Hanna will accompany me.

Where?

That is a good question.

He still hasn't told us where we're going.

I don't have time to get into details.

All you need to know right now is these two are my muscle and you two are my babysitters.

Okay.

Who are we babysitting?

KILBRIDE: Make a hole.

So, what Ah.

[MUFFLED GRUNTING.]

That's a big baby.

DEEKS: I really hope this is work-related.

[GRUNTING.]

Who is he?

Remember two seconds ago, when I said I don't have time for details?

Yeah, but it's Okay.

- I'm sorry.

What is?

- And for the love of G.

Gordon Liddy, - don't fall for anything stupid.

- [MUFFLED SHOUTING.]

If he starts bleeding, ignore him.

If he has a seizure, ignore him.

Even if he stops breathing - Ignore him?

- That doesn't seem like the best - babysitting advice I've ever gotten.

- Grab that bag.

Let's go.

Come on, let's go.

The only place we're going is home unless you tell us why the hell we're here.

I just told you.

These two are watching him, and you two are coming with me.

Not until you tell us where and why.

[SIGHS.]

I don't know where.

But the why is to try and buy back a missing Naval Intelligence officer who is about to be sold to one of our enemies.

Which enemy?

[SIGHS.]

You don't even know.

Let's get one thing straight.

I was doing this back when you were still trying to decide whether you wanted to be a spaceman or a cowboy when you grew up.

Well, Callen is a good cowboy name.

- I thought so.

- KILBRIDE: So any information I choose to share with you is at my discretion.

That's why it's called "need to know.

" And right now, all you need to know No, no.

You know what?

At this point, I don't care.

Come, stay.

I don't give a damn.

Hell, on second thought, all of you just stay here and order room service, and that way, you can Instagram your breakfast to all your snowflake friends so that everybody can know everything that's going on in everyone's bloody day.

Somebody should seriously think about switching to decaf.

Just to clarify, we can order room service, then?

- No.

- Can I rent a movie?

- No.

- Can I [GROANS.]

Find out who Bedroom Boy is.

- Will do.

- Eric, Nell, look into anything on missing Naval Intelligence officers.

- Already on it.

- Yep.

- This should be fun.

- Oh, yeah.

Be safe.

You know, he didn't say anything about the mini-fridge, and Cheetos at 40 bucks a bag taste so good.

What do you want?

So, what's in your bag?

It's not my bag.

It belongs to the guy in the room.

His name is David Conklin.

But until I tell you otherwise, I'm David Conklin and you two are my bodyguards.

[KILBRIDE CLEARS THROAT.]

So, you're not gonna tell us what's in the bag, huh?

12 million euros in Dutch bearer bonds.

I can't find a single report of a missing Naval Intelligence officer.

Did you contact SECNAV's office?

Yeah, and they said they'd "get back" to me.

Okay, did you mention that a sailor's life might be in jeopardy, not to mention the proprietary information that he or she may have had access to?

Kens, yes.

And they're basically ignoring me.

Okay, that's weird.

Unless they're sitting on it.

To what end?

Well, whoever the Navy has working on this may not want to alert the kidnappers that they know the officer is missing.

I mean, it buys them some time.

Would've helped if Admiral Kilbride gave us a name.

Yeah.

No kidding.

Uh, what about this Conklin guy?

Oh, that's Nell's department.

I'll let you know as soon as I know anything.

- All right.

Thanks, buddy.

- Okay.

I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life, but you got to stop moving so much.

You're making my picture blurry.

[GRUNTING.]

And one selfie.

Look at that.

I'll send those to Nell, see if we can get a positive I.

D.

[MUFFLED SHOUTING.]

I'm sorry, I don't speak duct tape.

I think he wants you to take off said duct tape.

[MUFFLED AFFIRMATIONS.]

Oh, you want me to take off the duct tape?

Why didn't you just tell me you wanted me to take off the duct I'll just take off the duct tape.

Just kidding.

I'm not taking off the duct tape.

You'll start screaming and yelling like a crazy person.

[MUFFLED SHOUTING.]

You won't scream like a crazy person?

[MUFFLED.] : No.

Uh-uh.

How do I trust you?

[MUFFLED SPEAKING.]

I think he just called me a whore.

Okay, sir, you know what?

You need to relax your body.

You're safe with us, okay?

[MUFFLED GRUNTING.]

No, she's right.

She's right.

You may not have been with the grumpy old guy, but you're definitely safe here with us now.

[MUFFLED YELLING.]

Just, um, out of curiosity, did he find you in this state of undress, or did he take your clothes off?

- [MUFFLED SHOUTING.]

- KENSI: Okay, are you saying that you're not safe with us?

Mm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm!

So then, by correlation, are we not safe here with you?

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Yes, we are safe with you?

[MUFFLED SHOUTING.]

- No, we're not safe with you.

- Mm-hmm.

No, we are not, yes, we are safe with you not Okay, stop.

I think it's a double entendre.

I think we're safe.

We have to get out of here right now.

- And why is that?

- Just get me out of here.

I will tell you everything I know, I swear.

I don't care where you take me, but we have to leave immediately.

- We're not going anywhere.

- Oh, good, then we're all gonna die.

Never should've taken the tape off.

You never take the tape off.

- Put it back on.

- I'm gonna [SHUSHING.]

[MUFFLED PROTESTING.]

How do you know this is the place?

- It was in Conklin's phone.

- Can I see that?

Eric, I'm sending you a call from Conklin's phone.

See what you can dig out of it.

Cool.

We got a warrant?

Eric wants to know if we have a warrant.

- Yes.

- ERIC: Great.

Can I see it?

And no, he can't see it.

What is this guy's deal?

Does anything about him seem off to you?

This whole thing seems off to me.

Hey.

I got access to Conklin's phone.

Great.

You find anything?

More than I expected.

Oh, yeah?

Me, too.

- Yeah?

- Mm-hmm.

David Conklin's just one name this guy has.

I have no idea who he really is.

Hey, Kens, are you seeing and hearing this?

- Well - [WHISTLING.]

Really?

Oh.

I'm sorry.

Uh, sorry, Nell.

No, not you; Deeks.

- Life in a robe is so comfy.

- [QUIETLY.] : Oh, my gosh.

Okay.

Uh, s-so what does he do?

Well, that depends on his chosen alias.

Uh, Brian Foster is a librarian in Utah.

Uh, Mike Edwards is a freelancer from Clearwater, Florida.

And John Kennedy is a screenwriter from Hollywood.

- Oh, interesting.

What has he written?

- They're all fake, babe.

Still gonna look up his IMDB page just to be sure.

KENSI: Okay.

We'll send you prints and dental.

Maybe you can find a match.

Oh, I got a good idea.

There is, uh, actually a Clif Bar in the mini fridge.

We could have him bite into it, then take a dental imprint.

That would probably only take half the bar, so we could split the rest of it like Lady and the Tramp.

Instead of a piece of spaghetti, it would be oatmeal raisin.

- Or - Mm.

We could just, um, take a photo of his teeth.

- You know?

- Gross.

Yeah.

Take that thing off.

You don't have to ask me twice.

[EXHALES.]

[KNOCKS ON DOOR.]

Why does an abandoned building have security cameras?

CALLEN: Find out what you can on this building, Eric.

See if you can get eyes inside.

ERIC: Yeah.

Copy that.

MAN [DISTORTED.] : Who is it?

David Conklin.

MAN: You don't look like David Conklin.

That's the whole point, Einstein.

Don't make me regret coming here.

Screw it.

Let's go.

What happened to "if at first you don't succeed"?

I am not walking around with the equivalent of over 13 and a half million U. S. dollars for amateur hour.

[BUZZING, DOOR OPENS.]

Come on in, gentlemen.

One at a time, please.

[WHIRRING.]

Leave your belongings in the security boxes.

Everything will be returned to you when you leave.

[WHIRRING.]

[CLEARS THROAT.]

Like I said, everything in the bin.

Oh, boy.

Callen and Sam just went offline.

We lost their cell signals and earwigs.

KENSI: Can you reboot them?

Uh, nothing's responding.

God, that whole building is a SCIF.

- Mm.

- We're deaf and blind.

I bet Garter Socks knows what's in there.

Mm-hmm.

Hey.

- Ow.

- Where are they meeting him?

[KNOCKING ON DOOR.]

Too late.

We're dead.

We're not dead.

I'm sure it's just housekeeping.

That's not housekeeping.

I got two sketchy guys.

KENSI: What are the chances they're working for whoever Callen, Sam and Kilbride are meeting?

Well, if they are and they come in here and find him, everybody's cover is blown, which means we need to get out of here now.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR.]

- Come on.

- [DEEKS GRUNTS.]

Go, go, go.

I got you.

- I got you.

I got you.

- [GROANING.]

MAN: This is hotel security.

We'd like to speak with you.

- Please open the door.

- [GRUNTING, INDISTINCT CHATTER.]

[GRUNTING.]

All right, let's go.

Okay.

- [CONKLIN GASPS, GROANS.]

- DEEKS: Oh.

- I think he wants to go first.

- No, wait!

Wait, wait, wait!

I-I-I can't swim!

Don't worry.

The fall will probably k*ll you.

- What?

No!

No!

- One, two, three!

[SCREAMING.]

That's gonna leave a mark.

Okay.

Okay.

Oh, geez.

- MAN: Open the door!

- All right.

- Jump!

[GRUNTS.]

- [GRUNTS, YELLS.]

Let's go!

Let's go!

Hi.

Hi.

Hotel spa is having a special on hot water massage.

I highly recommend it.

You know, they did a great job getting all those parts nice and shiny and spanking new.

Wait here.

It'll just be a moment.

Would've been nice to have known about some of these details.

We could've had backup waiting for us outside.

Backup?

[CHUCKLES.]

You think I had backup in Nicaragua?

Iran?

Rhodesia?

That's quite a résumé.

Not to mention they were all illegal U.

S.

operations.

And now here we are without weapons or communication.

30 seconds without a g*n or 911, and you're complaining like Kim Kardashian without her bubbly water.

Did he really just equate me to Kim Kardashian?

I'm, uh, surprised he knows who she is.

Okay.

You can come in now.

No, no, no.

Only one of them goes with you.

That's not how this works.

Then you can all leave.

I'll stay out here.

[g*nf*re SOUND EFFECTS PLAYING OVER VIDEO GAME.]

[HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING FAINTLY.]

[BAG HITS FLOOR.]

[CLEARS THROAT.]

You know, I used to be pretty good at that game.

Even won a couple of e-sport online tournaments.

Dude.

You?

Don't be an idiot.

Of course not.

I'm an adult.

That's funny.

You want to keep playing with yourself or make a deal?

Walking a thin line, my friend.

You know, in my day, when someone walked into the room, you stood up, you addressed them, like a man.

[CHUCKLES.]

All right.

All right.

This man enough for you?

Oh, that's a big g*n.

You compensating for something?

I could blow your head clean off.

Yeah, right.

If you doubt me you don't know me.

What the hell is that, a catchphrase?

You sound like a bad '60s cologne ad.

Now I'll tell you what I know, Sparky: Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder can wear sunglasses indoors.

Everyone else looks like an ass.

And the way you're holding that revolver proves to me that you've never even fired it.

- Oh, you think so?

- I know so.

You can't sh**t that thing one-handed.

Not with those pipe cleaners.

I've seen bigger arms on Somali pirates.

You know who I am?

Hmm?

What are you doing?

Well, I'm trying to give you 12 million euros in bearer bonds for Jess Adams.

Now, I know that's gonna blow all the other offers out of the water and give you exactly what you want.

What do I want?

Hours of playing with your big g*n in front of your computer.

But you don't get any of it if you sh**t me.

Stop talking crap, or I will.

Oh, good, you get to change.

What?

No thank-you for saving your life?

Saving my life?

Look at my belly.

[CLEARS THROAT.]

It's like a third-degree burn.

DEEKS: That was one hell of a belly flop.

[EXHALES.]

Feels like I have internal organ damage.

My spleen is throbbing.

You actually think you can feel your spleen?

When it's throbbing, yeah.

Can I get some clothes, please?

Absolutely.

We'll get you some clothes as soon as you tell us who it is that chased us off the balcony.

And who you were going to pay off with those bearer bonds.

No.

No?

That's it?

Yes.

Okay.

Well, that makes it easy no clothes.

What That's t*rture.

And coercion.

I'm pretty sure that doesn't rise to the level of t*rture.

You know what?

Combined with a bruised spleen and untreated skin burns, I think it does.

Hey, your spleen is fine.

How about a deal in exchange for leniency?

Our friends are in that building.

We want to know what they're walking into.

Oh, oh, they're inside?

And you have no idea what's going on?

That's why we're asking you.

You help us, can go a long way at the time of sentencing.

Oh, wait, sentencing?

Uh, yeah, that's the part where the judge tells you how long you're going to be in jail for.

Oh, a-and that's the part that comes after committing a crime?

I got to be honest, as a lawyer, I am floored by your grasp of the legal system.

Okay, Michael Cohen, let me ask you this.

What crime did I commit?

Well, for starters, those sock garters.

Huh?

Fashion police.

I'm pulling you over!

Tell us you have something.

Well, we still have no idea who the real David Conklin is, but we're pretty sure none of his aliases would have 12 million in euro in a gym bag.

What about our missing Naval Intelligence officer?

ERIC: Well, no one from Intelligence has been reported missing, but even if the Navy is sitting on this, someone didn't show up for work today, so we did a little digging.

There is one intelligence officer.

Uh, her name is Jess Adams.

She went on extended leave yesterday.

Okay, what does she do?

She's the Navy's Intelligence Liaison with DARPA.

That gives her access to all the m*llitary's top secret research.

That makes sense why the Navy doesn't want it out that she's missing.

More importantly, Jess Adams has dossiers on all the scientists and engineers working those top secret projects.

We're talking personal information, - home addresses, family members.

- Oh, yeah, it's bad.

Making them all incredibly vulnerable for being compromised.

Yeah, Jess Adams is definitely the vein to the mother lode of all m*llitary secrets.

How much you think that's worth?

I mean, the average ransom paid for a Westerner in the Middle East is around three million bucks.

If you're getting that for an oil executive, I'd say 14 million's about right for an intelligence officer.

Wow.

Have Callen and Sam come back online?

Um, not yet.

DEEKS: So we're buying back Jess Adams.

I mean, this is high-stakes poker.

Yep, and Kilbride's bluffing because he's not Conklin.

This Hail Mary can go wrong 20 different ways.

- I think we need to back them up.

- Yeah.

Oh, and, guys, this building has serious surveillance.

If you get spotted, it could be the 21st way for this thing to go wrong.

Understood.

Hey, look, keep looking into Conklin.

My guess, he's a middleman for some nefarious foreign power trying to get into Adams' head.

Yeah, and see if he has any connections to the usual suspects: Russia, Iran, China.

Oh, we're all over it, and address is on your phones.

- Perfect.

Thanks.

- Deuces.

[SIGHS.]

Okay.

We could make this work for 12 million euros.

Tell your boss thank you.

I wasn't talking to my boss.

I'm the boss.

I was crunching the numbers.

Yeah, and I'm Sandy Duncan.

Who?

Never mind.

Just get on with it.

[SIGHS.]

All right, so here's how it's gonna go down.

You're gonna leave half the bonds with us as a show of good faith.

If we have no better offers within the next 48 hours, we'll make the exchange for the other half.

No way in hell.

Excuse me?

If I'm paying, I say how this is gonna go down.

[CHUCKLES.]

Really?

Yeah, this is a one-time offer.

If I walk out that door, you'll never see me again.

Got to say, that wouldn't break my heart.

I know this might be hard for you, but we're going to do this like grown-ups.

You produce Jess Adams now, I give you the bearer bonds.

Fast, fair, no BS.

How did you live so long with a mouth like that?

I'm out.

Go back to your games.

You know, I could just take that money, k*ll you and your men, and still sell Jess Adams for a ridiculous profit.

So leave half, go home, drink your prune juice or whatever you do, and maybe I'll call you back.

Come on, old man.

You know I'm right.

[CLEARS THROAT.]

Do not cross me.

[GRUNTING AND GROANING.]

Sam, it's me!

Uh, no, no.

With me, quickly.

They're coming out now.

Move, move.

- It's Deeks.

Go, go!

- Move, move.

Let him go!

Move.

KENSI: Come on, baby.

Moving!

- DEEKS: Yee-haw!

- Let's go, baby, go!

'Sup, Buttercup?

Brought you a friend.

- [STAMMERS, SIGHS.]

- Do you have any idea who I am?

Yes, you're the guy who's gonna tell us where Jess Adams is.

I'm not saying anything without my lawyer.

Oh, see, that's where you're wrong.

You're gonna tell us exactly where Jess Adams is, or we're gonna treat you like a t*rror1st in the worst way possible.

- You don't scare me.

- No?

They threw me off a hotel balcony.

DEEKS: And we like him.

- I mean, fractionally.

- Where is she?

I want my phone call.

- KENSI: You got a phone?

- You took it.

Oh, well, I guess then you don't get a call.

You have to.

It's the law.

Tell her.

I must be allowed my phone call.

With what?

You just said you had no phone.

I know my rights.

DEEKS: Great.

Remember the one about remaining silent?

Let's focus on that one, shall we?

CALLEN: Enough, Kilbride.

We want answers.

- Oh, geez.

- That doesn't sound good.

All right, you two play nice, indoor voices, and, uh, no poking each other in the private parts.

This ends now.

Now, wouldn't that be nice?

Look, we agreed to help you, but you need to bring us up to speed.

[SIGHS.]

Well, what can I say, boys and girls?

It's a brave new world.

The dr*gs, money and g*ns of yesteryear have all been replaced with I.

P.

You do know what I'm talking about?

I don't.

Intellectual property.

Ones and zeros.

Our enemies know that getting their hands on our top secret m*llitary technology is difficult, if not impossible, but they have begun to realize, why steal the w*apon when you can just grab the guy who designed it?

Or woman.

So, where's Jess Adams now?

Ask him.

He was the one trying to sell her.

And you know this how?

[SIGHS.]

Conklin is an arms broker.

He puts people and weapons together, and he was rumored to have access to a Tsirkon.

Zircon?

The evil master of the universe, Zircon?

What is wrong with him?

SAM: 3M22 Tsirkon.

It's a Russian-made scramjet hypersonic cruise m*ssile.

It's capable of Mach 6 that's over 4,500 miles per hour.

Fast enough to render all of our current countermeasures ineffective.

Wow, Big And Tall is smart, too.

How exactly would he get his hands on that?

That's one of the things I was hoping to find out.

Instead, it turns out that he was shopping for one of our brightest young m*llitary minds.

So the $12 million in bearer bonds - was to buy Jess Adams?

- At least part of it.

The other guy's the one that kidnapped her?

Who is he?

NELL [OVER COMM.] : His name is Adnan Das, son of Vihaan Das, a self-made billionaire who made his fortune in the arms trade, legal and otherwise.

And this Adnan kid, he's just trying to, what, impress Daddy?

Mm, maybe.

I can guarantee you that the old man not only knows about this, he's probably the one behind it.

The kid's being groomed to take over the business.

It's easier to transport a human being than it is a w*apon.

Now you're catching on.

There are a lot of foreign powers that would pay to take a look inside Jess Adams' head.

So, where is she?

They could be holding her inside that facility.

Ooh, I sincerely hope not.

They torched the building soon after you left.

Guess we can cancel the search warrant.

So they still have Jess Adams, and we have no idea where they are now.

KENSI: Not to mention Conklin's 12 million.

They got away with that, too.

Well, we do have one thing they don't have.

Friendship?

We have him.

We trade Vihaan Das his son for Jess Adams.

That could work.

All right, how do we find him?

That's the easy part.

He doesn't exactly keep a low profile.

In fact, he posts more often than your average Hollywood celebutante.

His last IG post was 11 minutes ago on the golf course.

Sounds like we're headed to the links.

[GRUNTS.]

Can we help you?

Yeah, we need to speak to your boss there.

Well, he's busy.

And this is a private course.

If you'd like to speak with Mr.

Das, you can call his office and make an appointment.

Would you say that's arrogance or ignorance?

- Annoyance.

- Mm-hmm.

CALLEN: Yeah, I can see that.

SAM: We don't want any problems, all right?

- I wouldn't do that if I were you.

- Fellas.

Just [STAMMERS.]

Just-just easy.

All right, well, two on one hardly seems fair.

SAM: Guys, guys.

You think a little Mr.

Das.

[MAN COUGHING.]

- Thanks for taking your time.

- I couldn't pick a club.

I went with the wedge.

Lot of guys would've used a driver there.

Yeah, you don't know what you're talking about.

What the hell is this?

Vihaan Das.

And who are you?

We're two of the guys that have your son.

What are you talking about?

Adnan?

The, uh, wannabe gangster.

Kind of a mouth breather.

What do you want?

Jess Adams.

I don't know who that is.

Oh, no?

Well, I suggest you find out real quick if you ever want to see your son again.

No, no, no.

You-you can keep that.

You have an hour.

We'll call you with details for the exchange.

Nice day, gentlemen.

Hey, I think he bought it.

He's making a call.

SAM: Let me know who he calls and where they are.

We're all over it.

We can track him with the phone you gave him, listen in, even access the camera.

Kens, Deeks, we're a go.

Hey, Adnan, get up.

No sleeping in interrogation.

This is not gonna get you out of it.

Adnan, wake up.

Wait a minute.

I don't have a pulse.

Take the cuffs off.

- Come on.

- Got it.

[GRUNTS.]

Yep, there's no breath.

- Call 911.

- On it.

- [GRUNTING.]

- Oh, great.

[LINE RINGING.]

- Thank you, gentlemen.

- You got it.

What happened?

[SIGHS.]

Well, we have no idea.

Could've been a stroke or cardiac arrest.

Won't know until we have an autopsy report.

Well, I didn't do it.

I couldn't have gotten to him if I wanted to.

He just stopped breathing.

What did you say?

Why didn't you say something earlier?

Oh, I'm sorry.

Why wouldn't I want to help you?

Oh, that's right, you threw me off a hotel balcony.

One time.

Get over it.

Well, this sucks.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

What about him?

He's not going anywhere.

No oh, no, no, no, no.

You can't leave me in here with a dead body.

What if I'm being exposed to the same thing that k*lled him?

Why don't you try holding your breath?

Now what do you want to do?

I'm working on it.

What's the problem?

Well, in case you weren't paying attention, our only leverage just d*ed.

His father doesn't know that.

I'm pretty sure, if we showed up with a corpse, he'd figure it out.

You know, I really am starting to think that you guys are the greatest generation of whiners.

One little hiccup, and the sky is falling.

I spent six weeks in a tiger cage in Laos, up to my neck in fetid water and my own waste, and I never complained once.

Wow.

You ever considered writing for Hallmark?

Actually, we only need Vihaan to think his son is alive long enough to get Jess Adams back safely.

Okay.

How do you suggest we manage that?

Oh, come on.

You superglue his eyelids open and you tie some fishing line around his neck to keep his head from flopping Have you never done this before?

CALLEN: The coroner tends to frown on those shenanigans.

Then call in a favor.

[WHISPERS.] : He scares me.

KILBRIDE: A young woman's life is at stake, not to mention national security, and the guy's already dead, so he's not gonna mind.

As long as Vihaan brings Jess Adams to the meeting, we'll get her out of there.

Where do you want to do this?

Golf course.

- Are you kidding?

- No.

Does nobody except me think that's a stupid idea?

KENSI: I'm sorry, sir, so, uh, the golf course is the stupid idea, but this whole Weekend at Bernie'stheme is not?

[SCOFFS.]

The golf course is not a good idea.

- But that's why it'll work.

- Thank you.

Vihaan will think we don't know what we're doing.

He'll feel at home.

He'll be even more convinced he has the upper hand.

That gives us the advantage.

As long as we don't tell him the exact meeting spot until after he gets there, he won't have time to get into position.

And the openness of the golf course allows us to see if anybody's approaching and provides me with an open line of sight for my long g*n.

Hmm.

Well, don't look at me.

Last course I golfed on had a windmill on it, and I birdied.

Also, I love Weekend at Bernie's, so, uh, yeah.

I'm in.

Kens?

All clear and in position.

Deeks?

I'm Tiger ready.

Showtime.

KENSI: They got Jess.

I don't see anybody else.

Eric, Nell?

Yeah, we've got a drone online, but it's all clear.

Where is he?

Where's my son?

Let her go.

Not until I see my son.

Bring him in.

She walks to us, drives away.

We give you your son.

No one gets hurt.

Adnan, you okay?

CALLEN: He's been told to keep his mouth shut.

I want to speak to him.

SAM: You guys can spend a whole afternoon at Legoland, but let her go first.

Adnan?!

He's not talking.

Kens?

I'm on it.

[VIHAAN SPEAKING HINDI.]

- Enough talking.

- We got a deal or not?

Not.

Wrong answer.

[GRUNTING.]

Stay down.

We're clear.

Deeks?

- You okay?

- Yeah, I'm good.

Thanks.

Okay.

Clear!

[GRUNTS.]

All clear.

Okay, do you guys need anything on our end?

[GRUNTING.]

I think we're all good.

Thanks.

ERIC: Hey, um, would it be cool if I, uh, buzzed you guys with the drone?

[CHUCKLES.]

Like Maverick does in Top g*n with the tower?

If you do that, the next person to see that drone will be your proctologist.

Wow.

KENSI: Hey.

How's Jess Adams?

- SAM: Hey.

A little shaken up, but she's better now.

Her family was waiting for her at the hospital.

- Hospital?

Is she okay?

- Oh, she's fine.

We just wanted her looked over to be safe.

Oh, my God.

I just realized we left Conklin handcuffed in the boatshed.

Eh, he's fine.

Agent Castor's with him.

That's true.

He doesn't really seem like the kind of person that would chew his arm off to escape.

What kind of person does seem like that?

DEEKS: These two.

Right.

Yeah, I can see that.

So, I take it we finally got rid of, uh, Kilbride, huh?

- What's his deal, anyway?

- [WHISTLES.]

- I mean, he's just such a - KILBRIDE: What's my deal?

ERIC: Oh.

[STAMMERS.]

[CHUCKLING.] : Hey.

Didn't see you there.

You know what?

Well, you know what your deal your deal is?

Your deal is that you're covert and stealthy, which are super a-admirable qualities, which is fitting because you are indeed an admiral.

Which sounds similar to Anyway, um, but I-I am not stealthy, clearly.

I'm not stealthy.

But, um, I do I am not an admiral, either.

But you are, and I do have admirable qualities, which are but, like, a small "A," not a big "A.

" - [STAMMERS.]

- How long will he go on like this?

Days, weeks.

- Years.

- KILBRIDE: Mm.

Well, I suppose I should thank you for helping today.

That was very heartwarming.

I may start to blush.

Don't push it.

I don't play well with others.

I don't know.

I think we made a pretty good team.

Good enough.

Or maybe we just got lucky.

Well, on that triumphant vote of confidence, we should have - a congratulatory celebration - Oh!

at everybody's favorite watering hole, courtesy of its most generous bartender.

Yeah.

What do you think, Admiral?

You want to have a drink at our bar?

- You own a bar?

- DEEKS: Yeah.

The Squid & the Dagger.

Yeah.

That's right.

I'm surprised you haven't heard of it, because it's, uh, you know, it's trending.

Trending to do what?

What?

It's not trending to do anything.

It's just trending.

You know what I mean?

Trending, on the social media.

I'm more of an anti-social media kind of guy.

Like we're surprised.

Don't worry about it, Admiral.

Deeks will explain it all to you over an ice cold beer.

That, I understand.