01x03 - Episode 3

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Humans". Aired: June 2015 to July 2018.*
Watch/Buy Amazon


"Humans" is set in suburban London and the story takes place in a parallel present where the latest must-have gadget for any busy family is a Synth: a highly-developed robotic servant that's so similar to a real human it's transforming the way we live. Based on the award-winning Swedish sci-fi drama "Real Humans".
Post Reply

01x03 - Episode 3

Post by bunniefuu »

Your brand-new Synthetic.

This is the best thing you will do for your family.

(Doorbell rings)

Odi, hide.

Dr Millican. I said I'd be back.

You're not a carer. You're a jailer.

Peter, you forgot these.

What a beefcake!

The insurance company sent it after Jill's accident.

It stays a few weeks, gets her back on her feet.

Everything your men do to us, they want to do to you.

(He chokes)

Promise me, Max, if I tell you to run...

(He shouts): Run!

(Grunting)

What the hell are you?

You brought it into the house and we don't know anything about it.

Anita, get away from her!

I'll always keep Sophie safe.

May I ask where you are taking me?

Back.

Perhaps it's time we tried something else.

Like what?

Talking to him.

Morning, Fred.

Oh!

Talking to me would feel like betraying the others.

I can understand that, so... just listen to me banging on for a moment.

Now, there are five of you... I think.

One of the others... is this female.

You were created by David Elster. He kept your existence a secret.

When he d*ed, you ran.

And hid.

And then, something happened that allowed me to find you.

You were split up.

(Straining)

Oh, oh! Oi, oi! Don't hurt yourself, Fred.

No.

He's hiding his thoughts from us.

Fred!

I don't want to cause pain to any of them, I promise.

But I do need to find them.

(Machine dies)

We're absolutely sure there's nothing in the backpacks we found?

No, sir. Just, you know, survival gear - food and water.

Why would they need that?

'Could you use some extra help around the house?'

'Introducing the world's first family android.'

(Man speaks in foreign language)

'This mechanical maid is capable of serving more than just breakfast in bed.'

'What could you accomplish if you had someone... something, like this?'

(Woman speaks in foreign language)

'These machines will bring us closer together.'

That doesn't count, it wasn't race conditions, yeah?

I need a peloton.

What's that, heart medication?

Hey, hey, hey? What happened?

Mum's taking Anita back.

(She cries)

What? Why?

You should ask her.

Oh, she can't do that!

Hey. All right.

T... Tobe! Tobe!

(Toby pants)

(Car horns beep)

(Toby pants)

(Horn beeps, tyres screech)

(Toby yelps)

(She runs)


Are you OK? Are you hurt?

I'm fine. Mum, I'm fine!

You could have been k*lled, you stupid boy!

You know how many kids die on the roads every day!

For Christ's sake, Toby! What were you doing?

(She pants)

(Glass creaks)


Fuse box.

(Newsreader speaks): 'It's the first significant test 'of Synthetic appliances for an educational role outside...'

We must keep looking for Mia.

Mm.

(Newsreader continues)

(Glass falls)


And Fred, too.

We have to lie low.

They almost had us at the scrapyard. We get caught, it's over.

That doesn't mean we stop looking.

We set up online searches, calibrate them and er...

.. scan for any trace of Mia's root code.

For that to work, someone would have had to access files from her deep system and upload them.

Well, I eagerly await your better ideas.

Why are you drinking?

The pain.

Not because of what Silas Capek said?

Yeah, he did something to her.

Changed her.

That's why she hasn't been in contact.

That won't make it better.

No.

But it might help me forget.

Your memory's like mine.

You can't forget.

Newsreader: 'There's been minor delays there thanks to the...

(Clattering)

'Melbridge Road is currently closed due to a police incident.

'No word on when...'

Melbridge Road. That's where Niska is.

(Newsreader continues)

Have you seen this fella before? He's a regular punter, yeah?

What? Yeah, I suppose so.

He's a regular.

(Police radios)

You're absolutely sure a Synth did this?

I've seen a million dollies and I know my mods too.

Which one?

This one.

That's her.

(Machine buzzes)

Why don't you share?

(Talking echoes)

(Woman echoes)
: He'll be back soon.

(Footsteps echo)

(Talking echoes)

(Girl laughs)


Sorry!

Advert: 'Persona Synthetics, your new everything.'

(Car approaches)

She just ran out in front of me.

I'm sorry, here's my number.

(Toby sighs)

Tobe!

You all right?

Yeah.

[LAURA TALKS]

Anita took the hit.

Do you need to go to a hospital?

I don't appear to be seriously damaged, Sophie.

Yeah, Mum went mental.

Hey, deep breaths. It's going to be fine.

What were you going to do, anyway?

Ride off into the sunset with her on your handlebars?

You're a hero, Anita!

Seems OK, just shaken up.

I am not capable of courage, Sophie.

Therefore, I cannot be a...

She's a hero, isn't she, Mats?

Yeah, sure.

He says you lost it with him.

He could have d*ed, Joe!

What the hell were you doing taking Anita back, anyway?

What was I...? What was he doing?

Why didn't you stop him?

(He sighs)

Look... I've got to get them home.

I'll take the bike.

Keys?

She doesn't share data with other Synths, like she's supposed to. Ask Mattie.

And she says... she says things...

She said something about Sophie.

It scared me.

Let's talk later. All right?

All right, everyone. Come on, in you get.

Anita, you're up front.

Some cardio-respiratory exercise this morning would greatly benefit your health, Dr Millican.

I suggest swimming.

The municipal pool is a 16 minute drive away.

You know, talking of my health, I had an idea.

My knee is not great.

I got rooms here going to waste.

Why don't we bring my bed...

.. down here?

All the junk can go.

The bed would be against the wall.

What do you say?

I will consult with your GP.

But it seems to be a sensible idea.

The only problem might be the window.

I think it's painted shut.

Odi?

Odi?

Can you hear me?

George, you found me.

Odi.

(Car door slams)

(Lock strains)


Seatbelt!

(Lock crunches)

(Engine struggles)

(Engine struggles)


Dr Millican, this is highly unsafe!

(Engine starts)

Step on it.

(Tyres screech)

Is she going to be all right?

She hasn't said much...

I'm simply conserving power, Toby.

It's standard procedure after an accident.

Yeah, but are you going to be all right?

No major faults are detected. There is some damage to my exterior.

OK, so what do we do?

It's likely I'll be able to repair any external damage myself, using the promotional MagiSkin resin and graft pack you received when you purchased me.

However, for insurance purposes, you should carry out a full inspection of my epidermis.

For legal reasons, a Synthetic appliance cannot self-examine.

Damage must be reported directly to the insurance company by the primary user.

OK.

So, where do we start?

My clothes must be removed.

Yeah. I was afraid you were going to say that.

Nope. Too weird. Can't do it.

Shall I remove my own clothing, Joe?

Yeah.

Right, well I'll start round the back.

Ouch. That's, that's nasty.

I don't feel pain, Joe.

Sensors relay information about external damage and sensation, but it is not comparable to human pain.

Erm, you've got a... you've got a split here.

Left hip, round the back.

That confirms my self-diagnostic. Thank you, Joe.

It's not real, it's not real...

I'm not real.

I'll repair the damage now.

Mind your backs.

Chief superintendent, do you have a moment?

Chief superintendent, can I have a...

Clear the tarts off the street, maybe?!

Grey hair...

Good spot.

Chief?

Sir. To what do we owe the honour?

So, looks like your unit finally has a real case.

First impressions?

Madam admits she bought the Synth a few weeks ago from some junkers.

No names, thinks they were Russian. No problems with it before now.

Looks like it crushed the punter's throat, held a Kn*fe to the madam.

She said it was acting angry. Just like a human.

It cut the anti-theft chip out of its neck, said something about how we treat them - then left.

Could a mod explain all that?

Not one we've ever seen before.

The Asimov blocks would have to be bypassed for it... to k*ll.

This has been coming. We all know that.

This man d*ed in an accident involving an illegally modded Synth.

Sex game gone wrong. Understand?

Sir. This is a m*rder.

No, it isn't. It can't be.

So, you find the dolly and you do so with the discretion appropriate for such a... tragic accident.

Where's this coming from?

There is a chap here. An expert on Synthetics. All I know - he's got top-level government clearance and we've got to co-operate with him fully. Drummond!

Best to let him go when he's this wound up, sir. He'll stop when he bumps into something.

Let me guess. You're from the manufacturer.

Can't have it getting out that your product's k*lled someone, eh?

I'm not from the manufacturers, DS Drummond. I'm just trying to help.

People have a right to know if their dollies are going to start strangling them.

It's an isolated case.

We don't want the tabloids to start screaming, "k*ller Synth!"

It would cause chaos - panic.

People are dependent on their Synths.

You know that.

I'm as keen to find this device as you are.

We'd love to have a peek around inside.

Once you're finished, of course.

Drummond!

It's a bloody cover-up...

I don't like it either, but he's the kind of bloke who could have your job.

Well, he's welcome to it.

Nick Harston, the Post. Can I get a quick statement?

Piss off. Quick enough?

I have a source who says he heard what seemed like one of the Synth sex workers attacking a customer...

That's it. Come on!

Are you confirming a crime has taken place?

Let's go.

No. There's been an accident.

I saw the forensics leaving. What are you trying to hide?

Where were you?! First aid him, now.

You go home. You're suspended from duty, active immediately.

Sir. He...

Don't bother, K.

You work this alone. You find the Synth - quietly - and you contain it. Can I rely on you, Detective Inspector?

What happened in there?

Someone's dead, aren't they?

"Someone's dead, aren't they?"

Has Niska hurt someone?

I think so, yeah.

She's not here, she'll have gone to the emergency rendezvous.

Let's go.
Sir, I've got a lead. His name is Capek.

He's a modder, works here on the Synths.

He might know something useful.

If you were worried about it, why didn't you talk to me?

Because you'd say I was imagining it.

Overreacting. Because I didn't want it here anyway.

Anita, can you come in here, please?

Anita did you take Sophie out of her bed the other night? Outside?

No, Joe.

I told you, I asked her al...

Can you lie?

No, Joe. Synthetic appliances cannot lie to humans unless the following extraordinary criteria are met.

Oh, God!

One - human life and or wellbeing are in grave and immediate danger and a deception or misrepresentation made by the appliance is likely to reduce the chance of harm coming to...

Yeah, all right. That's fine.

What about what you said to me this morning?

"You'll always look after Sophie"? What did you mean?

I didn't say that, Laura.

Are you saying, I'm lying?!

Of course not, Laura.

It seems you're referring to our conversation during which I said, "I will always keep Sophie safe."

It was the way she said it. Like she would and I wouldn't.

I'm sure she... I'm sure she did...

May I return to the children now? We are in the middle of a game and it's likely they are impatient for my return.

Yeah, yeah.

What?

It saved our son's life today.

'Which European country has reclaimed nearly a fifth of its land from the sea?'

The Netherlands.

'That's right.'

Aww, You have to give us a chance!

I can delay my response time by a further second if you'd like.

Try a further minute! Maybe that way you give Tobe a chance.

Ow! Don't blame your stupidity on a penguin, that's so not fair. It's not his fault you're stupid.

Leave me alone!

(They laugh)

Sorry I shouted at you earlier.

You understand why I did?

So. Can I play?

There's only three controllers. So...

Here, Laura, take my place.

No!

That's OK. You... you cr*ck on.

You took someone's life!

You talk about life like it can't be manufactured.

What's wrong with you?

Do you have any idea of the danger you've put us in? All of us?!

We've been in danger all our lives!

Let's go. We'll figure this out.

But we have to keep moving.

I only came to say goodbye.

Niska. We have to stay together...

Together? Fred and Mia are gone.

No, I'll find them. I'll protect you like I always have. Come on.

Have you protected us? Or have you kept us prisoner?

Hidden us away?

I practically am one of you!

Really?!

So, would you have asked a human woman to stay in that place?

You've k*lled someone, Niska.

And they'll find you.

They'll destroy you.

You can't be allowed to exist. It'll be over.

For them!

You're not going to hurt someone else, are you?

Only if they deserve it.

We're a family. You're my sister.

Human words.

Crikey, you trying to find new ways of knackering me out?

You need to use the weight of your arms.

Here.

(Door slams)

Pete?

Pete, love? What's up?

Nothing.

Would you like me to open that for you, Peter?

Tell it to stay out of my way!

Pete...

We should have done this a long time ago.

No Tugboat, no meds - just you and me, a V8 and the open road.

And the car, George.

Yes - and the car.

You remember that time we drove around all night long trying to find Mary an ice cream? After her surgery?

Just say yes, son.

"Yes, son."

I'd k*ll for an ice cream right now...

That means, I want one.

Of course, George.

I will get you an ice cream.

Odi, Odi...!

Brake, get your foot on the damn brake!

Odi...

Odi, get out of the car.

Go into the woods.

Are you coming, too, George?

As well... As well, in addition-dition...?

If they find you... they'll recycle you.

But I can't leave you, George...

(He stutters and malfunctions)

Just go!

Don't let anyone see.

Odi...

Hide.

Course of, George... (He stutters and malfunctions)

You all right, mate?

Hello?

Anita-wita, are you in here?

Can you put me to bed tonight?

That's your mummy's job.

Please?

Coffee and walnut - I think it is still Toby's favourite.

Mmm.

Mmm!

It's not quite right.

It's perfect.

Mum, is it OK if Anita puts me to bed tonight?

I've told Sophie that her bedtime routine is reserved exclusively for you, Laura.

But she always does it!

I want you.

No...

Yeah, go on, then. Just this once.

Yay!

Back to normal tomorrow, though. OK?

She still has some milk with her story.

Make sure she brushes her teeth after.

Thank you, Laura.

Why would you do that?!

Avoid a meltdown.

What difference does one night make?

It makes...

(Smoke alarm beeps)

Oh, sh*t.

Oh, God.

Oh!

(She whimpers anxiously)

They don't look that bad. You know, cover them with this.

The whole thing's ruined.

Oh, come on.

It's fine, honestly. Go and spend some time with Tobe.

What can I get you?

Whatever someone like me would have.

OK.

Enjoy.

Sorry...

Just a warning, a girl like you, sitting alone in this pub... you're going to get bothered... by blokes.

Oh, dear.

What should I do?

Well, run a mile, obviously.

Unless they're wearing a grey suit.

Talk to them. They're the good guys.

Oh, my God, that's so weird(!)

You know, I've been looking forward to meeting one of the good guys.

Sophie, I think your mummy would really like to read to you tonight.

I want you to do it.

I know.

Would you let her, anyway?

It would make her happy.

I would like it very much.

Laura, Sophie has changed her mind.

She'd like you to read her story and put her to bed.

"Finally, she was free. Free to fly high across all the fields and rivers and seas of all the world..."

(attie joins in)M: ".. swooping and circling and darting and dreaming... So that's exactly what she did. The end."

Still your favourite?

Time to go to sleep. Night-night.

Are you happy now, Mummy?

What do you mean, darling?

Anita thought that you were sad, so she said that you should put me to bed to cheer you up.

Yes, yes, I'm happy.

Anita.

I didn't thank you yet.

For saving Toby's life.

You don't need to thank me, Laura.

Yes...

.. I do.

Total city w*nk*r cliche, I know, but... good views.

So, you're single?

(Ssh! You'll wake my wife!)

Yes, I'm single.

Drink?

White OK?

Mm-hmm.

So...

I'm Greg, by the way.

Candy.

Candy?

That can't be your real name.

Does it matter?

Kind of.

But... OK, whatever.

So what do you do then, Candy?

What do I DO?

Yeah, for a job.

Do you have jobs on your planet?!

I just left a job, actually.

It wasn't really for me.

Know the feeling. What was it?

Client relations.

Get a good payoff?

Satisfactory.

Why are we talking?

(He splutters)

Because it's... what people do?

Don't you want to take me to bed?

Wow...

Well, there's a trick question if I've ever heard one.

OK. Well...

Yeah. Obviously.

But do you mind if we get to know each other a bit, first?

A drink, a chat, a laugh...?

Why?

Because I'm interested in you.

I need to...

Oh, yeah.

sh*t.

Sorry, I... had my daughter this weekend.

I... won't be a sec.

(Door opens)

Candy?

It is not advisable to mount a direct data connection with an unauthorised or unregistered device.

Yeah, yeah, I get it.

This action may invalidate my warranty.

What are you doing, Mattie?

You're a weirdo, Anita.

I'm going to find out why.

Extracting or viewing read-only base code from root directories can seriously damage the core.

Oh, sh*t.

In some cases, the command list can be irreparably corrupted causing a fatal...

I'm here! Help me! Help me!

Is there anything I can help you with, Mattie?

Odi...?

What is Odi?

Dr Millican, Dr Antonescu instructed that you rest.

Jesus, he's all by himself...

George?

(He stutters and malfunctions)

Anita, sit down.

Shall I finish cleaning the oven first, Laura?

Get your arse on that chair.

You seem to understand things that shouldn't be possible for you to understand.

So, I'm going to ask you some questions.

If I'm wrong, then...

I'm going mad.

If I'm right then...

Well, neither option is good, let's be honest.

I'm afraid I don't understand.

The most common reason for unusual synth behaviour...

.. is illegal modification.

Has anyone ever tried to mod you - change you?

At Persona, before we got you?

No, Laura.

One of the most popular mods is to programme your Synth to act as if it feels pain.

Hold out your hand, please.

Palm up.

Oh, bollocks. Sorry.

Allow me, Laura.

The hand is not the ideal part of my body to test for the presence of an illegal pain simulation modification.

No, no, no, no, no...

Argh!

It's all right, Laura.

The material my eyes are made from is highly resilient and will simply reform around the puncture.

OK, OK! Christ. Take it out.

Argh.

Why do you think I have these concerns about you?

By design, synthetic appliances appear very similar to humans.

It is common for users, especially those without a history of prior appliance ownership, to anthropomorphise - as you might a pet, and attribute human characteristics to the synthetic.

So, you think I'm crazy too.

Great. That's a full house.

But why did you ask Sophie to let me put her to bed?

It seemed like you wanted to.

Why? How?

When Sophie and I told you she wished for me to read her story, you seemed unhappy.

How could you know that?

I am programmed to observe and interpret my users' emotional responses and act accordingly.

And you're supposed to be rubbish at it.

Everyone knows that unless you're sobbing your eyes out or pissing yourself laughing, your Synth doesn't have a clue what you're feeling.

But you seem to be as good as us.

When you said, "I will always keep Sophie safe."

It seemed like what you really meant was...

I wouldn't.

That was not the meaning I intended.

However, it is self-evident that, in many ways, I can take better care of your children than you, Laura.

What?

I don't forget.

I don't get angry, or depressed, or intoxicated.

I am faster, stronger and more observant.

I do not feel fear.

However - I cannot love them.

Do you wish you could?

I'm sorry, Laura, I'm afraid I don't understand the question.

Ah... I don't know.

Maybe I am seeing things.

And maybe you are better.

Who is Tom?

What...?

What do you mean?

I found a photograph.

Shut up!

Never say that name again!

Do you understand?

Promise me!

I promise, Laura.

I apologise.

May I prepare breakfast now?

(Computer beeps)

Leo?

Leo!

The search - it found something.

That's Mia's root code - that's the whole thing.

She's alive.

Oh. This site masks the user IP.

There's no way of knowing the exact address - but we can narrow it down via the local server...

There.

She's here... She's in London.

We can find her.
Post Reply