01x12 - #TeamLucifer

[bunniefuu]

Previously on Lucifer...

(phone chimes)

Don't worry, I'll answer for you.

Chloe: He ended it with me tonight with a text.

Who do you want me to k*ll?

Lucifer Morningstar.

Bye-bye, Devil.

] LUCIFER: This is my Pentecostal coin. Subway token for the damned. It's all yours if you don't sh**t me.

Leave the bottle.

I had sex with your brother.

] LUCIFER: That puts you in my good graces how?

MAZE: Well, I was his inside woman, and now I'm yours.

(g*nshots)

] LUCIFER: Why is it that sometimes I'm immortal... and other times I'm all too human?

It appears that you make me vulnerable.

(men chanting)

(crying)

Man: Colligitur hoc sacrificare adulescentulam virginem magna atque magnifica.

Lucifer!

(screaming)

♪ I ain't no angel ♪
♪ Don't got no halo ♪
♪ I cut off my wings ♪
♪ Made my mama scream ♪
♪ Whoa ♪
♪ I'm your darkest dream... ♪

That... was hot.

♪ They call me Devil ♪
♪ My heart is empty ♪
♪ They call me Devil... ♪

Let's make it even hotter for the real Lucifer.

"Real Lucifer"?

Trust me.

♪ I'll steal your soul ♪
♪ I'll eat you whole ♪
♪ Ain't no other way, they call me Devil ♪
♪ And you should be afraid... ♪

(metallic clang)

(gasps)

Baby?

Come on, this isn't funny!

(grunts)

(screams)

(grunts)

Well?

LUCIFER: No. Not a scratch. Right, well, that rules out iron. Try the copper.

Oops. You know exactly what's causing your vulnerability.

Chloe Decker is the one I should be throwing knives at. Who knows what she's hiding.

LUCIFER: Yes, she seems to be the one thing that can hurt me, but there may be other things as well. The detective may simply be a cog in a bigger machine.

This is called being thorough.

More like denial.

Because if you really thought that I could hurt you with these, you wouldn't let me throw them at you.

LUCIFER: Very funny. Demon daggers forged in Hell don't count. We all know those prick. And speaking of, how's my brother?

Three weeks of a whole lot of this?

How do you think he's doing?

LUCIFER: You're not going steady, Maze. You're getting close to him for a reason. Don't forget it.

I haven't. And I don't think Amenadiel is the one weaponizing Chloe.

LUCIFER: You don't think? Game's too dangerous to be guessing. I think it's time to send my brother back to high Heaven. Forcibly, if necessary.

LUCIFER: (shouts, grunting) (laughing) See, there is something else. It seems Italian marble is also a thr*at, so...

(doors opening)

LUCIFER: Oh. Detective? What a surprise.

Where have you been?

LUCIFER: Ah, you know me... busy, busy. No rest for the wicked.

Right.

'Cause deviant foreplay is so time-consuming.

Want to watch?

I've been calling you for three weeks.

Why are you avoiding me?

LUCIFER: Well, I do have a business to run, Detective. I can't play Good Cop/Handsome Devil Cop all the time.

I've got a case that I can't do without you.

LUCIFER: Really? (stammers) What's so special about it?

You just have to see for yourself.

LUCIFER: Right.

♪ Ah, ah ♪
♪ Oh, no ♪
♪ Ah, ah-ah-ah-ah ♪
♪ Oh, no ♪

(sirens wailing)

♪ Ah, ah ♪

(protestors chanting)

♪ Oh, no ♪
♪ No, she don't mess around ♪
♪ No, she don't mess around... ♪

We don't know a lot yet, but we found the victim's purse in a Dumpster behind the theater.

Her name's Rose Davis.

She's 19 and...

What are you doing back there?

LUCIFER: Just listening to your boring facts.

She's a freshman at Pasadena City College, lives in Arca...

LUCIFER: Yeah, excuse me, Detective, I'm not hearing any reasons to why you need me on this case.

I don't know how you can hear anything... you're standing five feet away from me.

Get over here.

LUCIFER: You sound phlegmy. I don't want to get sick.

Really? Let's go.

Protestors (chanting): Satan is here, but God is near!

Satan is here, but God is near! Satan is here...

You.

Evil is here.

Evil is here.

Protestors (chanting): Satan is here, but God is near!

Friend of yours?

Satan is here, but God is near!

I meet a lot of people.

Satan is here, but God...

Take the sheet off.

(camera shutter clicking)

LUCIFER: Oh, well. That is unfortunate. But I still don't understand why you need me on this case.

Roll her over.

That's why.

LUCIFER: "Hail Lucifer"?

(camera shutter clicking)

LUCIFER: This is sickening.

I know. It's horrific.

LUCIFER: No, I mean, to blame it on me. It's an atrocity. These Satanists. Misguided cult nobheads with Frisbees in their earlobes. This poor girl's death has nothing to do with me, Detective.

Man: This is your doing! This is your fault!

You, what are you doing in here?

You're the Devil!

You're the King of All Evil!

You're the King of All Lies! You must be destroyed! I'm gonna give you what for if you don't get out of my crime scene, pal.

Who let this guy through?

He's the Devil!

I'll rise again against you!

No thanks necessary.

Just wanted to do my part for the man of the hour.

LUCIFER: It's the wink with the p*rn stache sending the wrong message, I think.

(laughs)

Do you two know each other?

LUCIFER: Nope, just heard a lot about this guy. All bad, of course.

Detective Malcolm Graham.

I wasn't gonna tell her we're already buddies. You know, me trying to k*ll you, the whole magic coin thing. TMI... am I right?

LUCIFER: I'd like you to stop touching me now.

(laughs)

Ah, you're hilarious. We should get a drink sometime.
Yeah, maybe play some pool, huh?

Hey, Chloe? If, uh, if we could talk soon, some stuff went down with Malcolm.

I mean, I know now's a bad time...

Yeah, it is.

This bruising here around the s*ab wounds.

Dan: Hilt marks maybe.
And these.

There's subdermal implants.

They don't look fresh.

I don't know what they are.

Symbols? Designs maybe?

Well, not a lot of places do that kind of body modification.

Malcolm and I will try to find who put them in.

All right.

He and I have to meet Rose's father at her apartment.

Right, where is that exactly?

Uh, 1625 Lynrose.

LUCIFER: Right, I'll see you there.

What? What-what are you doing?

LUCIFER: I'm gonna take my own ride. You're a wretched driver.

Since when?

♪ It's colder now than it was ♪
♪ Yesterday ♪
♪ Warm down south ♪
♪ So I'm on my way... ♪

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Were you close with your daughter?

Yes.

Well, we were when she was little, but you know, single father with a teenage daughter...

Yes, I'm quite familiar with the absentee father excuses.

Can you tell us why Rose marred herself recently with subdermal implants?

What?

That doesn't sound like Rosie.

This bookshelf's been moved a lot.

(hinges creaking)

LUCIFER: Oh, lovely. Very mid-century r*pist.

Hello, bad guys?

What is this place?

It's a creepy, secret evil room.

You didn't know about this?

No.

What's this?

It's a chicken.

Or what's left of it.

LUCIFER: If that's supposed to be an offering for me, then I decline on grounds of salmonella.

This picture, th... this isn't Rose.

Mr. Davis, I'm so sorry.

But maybe this wasn't a random att*ck.

Maybe your daughter was involved with whoever k*lled her.

It's a large man by the looks of it, who's, uh, not a fan of bathing.

Mr. Davis: This is crazy.

I mean, even if she was into this stupid Devil thing, she wouldn't have sacrificed herself.

LUCIFER: Yes, but sometimes the people closest to you can turn on you. Wouldn't you agree, Detective?

Maybe.

"For my Corazon.

Love, Rose."

"Corazon" is Spanish for heart.

Could be a term of endearment.

Could be a name.

Mr. Davis: I should've reached out.

Called more.

I thought I knew her.

Oh, yes, I know exactly how you feel.

(phone rings)

Decker.

We called around, found the girl that gave Rose her subdermals.

Said she, uh, came in a couple weeks ago with a guy.

Weird guy, apparently, with a weird name, too, but she can't remember it.

Ask if the name's Corazon.

Hey. Was the guy's name Corazon?

Yeah, that's it.

Uh, jet black hair, lots of piercings and tattoos.

Did you hear that?

Yeah, generic Satanist.

What about the, uh, subdermals... she know what they mean?

No.

Says Rose brought them in herself.

She was super secretive about 'em.

Uh-huh.

We'll talk soon.

Ah, look at you two.

MALCOLM(sighs) Marriage falling apart, trying to work together...
So cute.

DAN: Yeah, well, maybe if you hadn't sent her a break-up text while I was unconscious...

Oh. Hey, speaking of kicking your ass, I'm proud of you for bouncing back.
Friends fight, right?

Yeah. d*ck.

(distant siren wailing)

(alarm chirps)

(growling)

(grunts)

Why is Lucifer still alive?

Oh, it's you. You scared me, dude.

Have you forgotten what will happen to you if you don't comply with our deal?

No, but I forgot to tell you! Lucifer spilled the beans.

What are you talking about?

All that jazz about condemning me to eternal damnation? Poppycock, apparently.

You're an angel and Lucifer said that you're not allowed to k*ll me.

Plus... I got this beauty right here. It's my get-out-of-Hell-free card.

(growls)

(sighs)

So... unless you got a better offer...

LUCIFER: #TeamLucifer. It's not half bad, this. I mean, the writing's atrocious, but it's not complete drivel. Listen to this: "Satan represents a beacon of honesty in a sea of mass self-deceit."
Mmm. And... oh. Hello. There's a whole chapter on sex. I like this book.

CHLOE: Rose's subdermal implants... I'm pretty sure they're letters.
But I've arranged them 100 different ways and I can't come up with anything significant.

"Chili furis"?

"I hurl ficis"?

No.

But could... could you come over here, please?

LUCIFER: Oh, bloody hell. Filii hircus. It's Latin. Means "children of the goat." Why do they always associate me with goats? I mean, I don't even like their cheese.

Here we go. "Church of the Dark Prince."
Location is secret.
Looks like you have to be a member.
Geez, look at this questionnaire.

Oh, and of course, there's a fee.

LUCIFER: $200? Sinful.

There's got to be a faster way.

LUCIFER: "What is your gift to the Devil?"

Chloe: How about... filii hircus?

Yes!

(mumbling to self)

All right. Okay... what...

LUCIFER: Yeah, I'll see you there!

What...?

♪ ♪

(clears throat)

Okay.

That's it.

You're being a freak. You've been avoiding me for weeks, you won't get in my car. What's your problem?

LUCIFER: There's no problem. Just maybe you're not as charming as you think you are.

Wait, is this about that vulnerability thing?

LUCIFER: Actually, yes.

I mean... I get the teensiest bit touchy-feely with you and you freak out.
Ugh. All I meant that night is that I can trust you. That's all. Okay?

LUCIFER: Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

(clears throat)

(whispering) Filii hircus.

LUCIFER: (sighs) Habeas corpus? Bababooey?

You had it right the first time.
But today is private.

CHLOE: Too private for Lucifer himself?

You're supposed to be blond.

LUCIFER: Yes, I get that a lot.

You have ID?

LUCIFER: Absolutely. Let me just, uh... Oh. Dearie me. I seem to have left it in the car.
Detective, would you mind going to fetch it, please?

CHLOE: What am I, your dog?

LUCIFER: Detective... After you.

It's very Eyes Wide Shut.

LUCIFER: Too bad I forgot my sexy mask.

Does anything scare you?

LUCIFER: Should it?

Man: Rose is gone.

But it is not her death that was important, it was her life.

The imprint she left behind.

See, Rose will be remembered.

She will live on forever.

This isn't a sacrifice.

It's a memorial.

Quite civilized, actually.

Yeah, they don't seem like K*llers.

Mmm.

Onyx: And so now it is time to invoke the Four Crowned Princes of Hell.

Oh. Scratch that.

Visualize the blue light filling your entire being. Satan to the east.
Beelzebub to the north...

LUCIFER: This is preposterous.

I thought you'd love this.

LUCIFER: First of all, there's only one me. And secondly, the whole worship thing is more my father's bag.

And now...

Lucifer will speak!

LUCIFER: What?

(thump)

LUCIFER: Ooh. Oh. No. No, no, no, no, no. This is where I draw the line.

Ow.

Ow.

LUCIFER: Excuse me, excuse me! Sorry. Sorry.

Man: Hey, man.

If you would just butt out.

LUCIFER: Right! I'm the real Lucifer and I insist that you stop this nonsense immediately. I mean, have you heard yourselves? It's embarrassing. Blue light coming out your ass or whatever it was. I mean, you preach rebellion, but you're-you're misguided sheep. And goat. Where's the real defiance? The free will?

Satanist: Yeah!

Free will!

Free will rules!

(applause)

LUCIFER: No, no! You're doing it again. Don't applaud. This whole thing's a sham!

(woman whoops)

Anarchy!

(cheering, whooping)

LUCIFER: I mean, just-just look at this. What is this supposed to be? Alien fetus? Pickled demon?
He's the best Lucifer we've had in years.

(chanting) Lucifer! Lucifer!

Lucifer...

LUCIFER: Stop! Someone k*lled this girl! She didn't deserve that. This is not what I stand for.
Is that what you all wanted? Eh? Should be ashamed of yourselves.

LAPD.

Put the Kn*fe down.

Why were you running?

I wasn't.

I was upset.

LUCIFER: Feeling guilty, are you? Tell me... why?

What, our new Devil's a cop, now, is he?

LUCIFER: Oh, worse than that, I'm afraid. So come on. Tell me, what nasty little urge are you hiding in your hoodie, hmm?

I want to k*ll...

LUCIFER: Yeah?

I want to k*ll the sick bastard who k*lled Rose.

And then, after that, I want the hell out of this racket.

LUCIFER: Oh.

What's your name?

Onyx.

Hmm?

(sighs)

Mitch Watson. Yeah, I changed it when I joined the church. 12 years later, I'm the frickin' high priest.
I'd love to bail.

Kind of late for a career change, though.

I mean, the whole thing's a joke.

LUCIFER: So, hold on... Are you saying you don't believe in Lucifer?

Look, mate, the Devil ain't gonna buy me an Aston Martin.

LUCIFER: Well, not with that attitude, he won't.

I mean, I like the philosophy.

But it attracts a lot of weirdoes who take it way too seriously.

And, of course, now Rosie's dead.

Yeah, and I see you have the same subdermal implants as she did.

All the hard core members... they all get this.

I was trying to tell Rosie that she would regret it later, but she became obsessed.

She was an impressionable girl.

LUCIFER: Well, her father was absentee. I suppose that's why she got involved in all this nonsense, to piss her dad off.

Actually, it was, uh... it was her boyfriend, Corazon, he's the one who brought her in.

Man, the guy's a creeper. He kept talking about doing real sacrifices on animals.

Did Corazon have access to this Kn*fe?

Yeah, probably.

This here is just for show.

The blade springs inside the handle.

Hmm. Strange.

'Cause if it was real... it could definitely match the marks found on Rose's body.

We do have an actual version.

Hold on.

Kn*fe's gone.

Okay, we need to find Corazon now.

Yeah.

Do you have, um, his real name, uh, where he lives, his address?

Give me a sec.

Ugh.

Looks just like you.

LUCIFER: I manscape.

I'm starting to understand why you chose this persona.

All-powerful...

Invincible...

LUCIFER: Not exactly.

Ah. Or it's because you think that everybody's out to get you.

LUCIFER: That's because they are. But trust me, I didn't choose it. Why would anyone choose to be vilified?

Thought the Devil was supposed to be immortal.

LUCIFER: Well, one angel can hurt another, so...

Oh, what...? What are you doing?

(door opens)

No address, no last name, nothing.

Hmm.

He used PayPal to pay for the fee.

All right, I'll call in a warrant.

LUCIFER: Well, if you can't bring Muhammad to the dim sum...

Hey.

Why'd you stand me up?

AMENADIEL: I had one task... one... to get my brother back to Hell. I've not only failed, but I've actually made things worse. I'm even sleeping with a demon.

Yeah, you lucky son of a bitch. Come on, you can't say that this isn't the best sex you've ever had. Well, it is the only sex you've ever had, but still.

(chuckles)

Look, I've had a lot of sex, with men and women.

I mean a lot.

Okay. Point made. But this, with you, I don't know, it's... it's different. But if you're not happy here, then you should go home.

AMENADIEL: I can't. I can't face my father as a failure. Look, I have a job to do. There's no choice.

I understand.

Chloe: Okay. Great.

Yeah, I'll be here.

All right.

So we got a real name for Corazon...

Mike Carey... but it could take us a while to find him, so you should probably head home.

LUCIFER: Oh, no, no, no. Not till this human stain's brought to justice.

(scoffs) I can't get near you, now I can't get rid of you.

Whatever.

I'm gonna go up and shower.

Stay put. Do not wake up Trixie.

♪ ♪

(sighs)

Did you just throw a toy at me?

LUCIFER: Oh, you're awake. But since you're up, I have some questions for you.

Right.

LUCIFER: Are you adopted? In other words, are you sure the detective is your mother? Could she be from somewhere else? Does she have any special powers? Uh-uh. What about any markings? Scars, on her back perhaps? There's some chocolate cake in it for you.

I want cash.

LUCIFER: Oh. (chuckles) I like your style. All right.

Mommy does have a scar.

LUCIFER: Oh?

On her butt. From when she got bit. By the Kraken.

LUCIFER: Right. Not the direction I was going for, but what's this Kraken that you talk of?

Chloe: My mom's evil Chihuahua.

LUCIFER: Why aren't you showering?

'Cause I left my phone down here. Why is Trixie awake?

(snaps)

Get back in bed, young lady.
Night, Lucifer.

All right, seriously.

No more freaky behavior.

If this is about the other night, I'm sorry, okay?

What do you want me to do, take it all back?

LUCIFER: No, can you take your shirt off, please?

What?

Are you serious?

LUCIFER: I need to see your back.

Why?

LUCIFER: Because I want to know if you're an angel sent to destroy me.

(sighs)

LUCIFER: Nothing.

Yeah.

Is this about the scars on your back?

Look, I have no idea what happened to you or what's going on with you now, but... not everyone's out to get you.

(phone buzzing)

They found him... Corazon.

Woman: We found his car like this.

It's registered to Mike Carey.

(clattering)

(gasps)

(Malcolm chuckles)

Just like old times, huh?

Don't sh**t me though.

Funny.

Come on, I'm just joking.

(clattering)

Ah, Detective Douche, Detective Stache.

What a pleasant surprise.

Did you find anything?

Place seems empty.

Chloe (whispering): My God.

It's definitely Mike Carey.

Detectives, can I show you something?

(siren wailing)

So what do you really make of all this, huh?

The "Hail, Lucifer," the pentagram?

I think it's a long time since I encountered genuine evil.

Wow.

(sniffing)

It's not blood. It's paint.

So the k*ller strapped Mike up then decided to go all Jackson Pollock?

I guess.

Yeah, looks like an "A."

That can't be random.

I think it's a word.

(gasps) Giant anamorphic print.

"Morningstar."

Dan: Whoa. Another Satanic message.

Or a fan letter.

Morningstar is not exactly the most common name for the Devil.

You think someone did this for our Lucifer?

That's kind of a leap, Dan.

Yeah, but if I'm right, it's also a conflict of interest.
Somebody could be doing this on his behalf, or maybe he's involved in a different way.

What does that mean?

Lucifer: Yes. What are you insinuating?

DAN: That some psycho might be k*lling people because of your whole Devil shtick.

You're blaming this nonsense on me?

DAN: You do take the whole Satan thing pretty seriously.

LUCIFER: You really think I'd do these vile things? These kids were pretending to be bad, but they weren't, they were innocent, so I would never hurt them, I'm not a monster.

Chloe: Okay, guys. That's enough. Lucifer, maybe you should go home.

LUCIFER:
Oh, no, allow me to stay in this rusty tin can a little longer. You came to me, you insisted I work this case.


Okay, this sounds crazy, but this case might involve you.

What do you mean, involve me?

You know what I mean.

(sighs)

I'm trying to protect you.

LUCIFER: Oh, protect me from the evil or the world from evil me?

Can you believe Detective von Douche boots me off the case?

And Chloe agreed to this?

(sighs) She didn't disagree.

(chuckles incredulously)

LUCIFER: How could she even think I'm capable? Here? That's why I left. I thought she knew me. I thought I knew her.

And now you don't trust her anymore?

Oh, it's just this whole immortality thing. Uh, for some reason, Detective Decker makes me vulnerable.

Also known as "intimacy."

LUCIFER: No. No, she literally makes me exsanguinate.

Being vulnerable can be scary. But there are benefits when you open yourself up to someone.

LUCIFER: I just wish I knew who was behind this. My dad? My brother? Someone else?
I mean, the detective doesn't seem to know, but she could be lying. Is she part of the plan to k*ll me, or is she just a-a pawn?

Maybe we should explore the possibility that being vulnerable can be a good thing.

No, it can't. It means you're at someone else's mercy.

Then maybe you should just stay away from everybody.

Stay away from Chloe.

But... I don't want to.

Then don't.

♪ ♪
♪ I'm calling ♪
♪ Know you hear me ♪
♪ So I'm pleading ♪
♪ Please forgive me ♪
♪ 'Cause there's something ♪
♪ I've been aching ♪
♪ To confess ♪
♪ All of this mess is ♪
♪ All, all, all, all ♪
♪ All, all, all, all ♪

(grunting)

♪ All ♪
♪ All, all ♪
♪ All, all, all, all ♪
♪ All, all, all, all ♪

Amenadiel.

♪ All, all ♪
♪ It's all ours. ♪

Protestors (chanting): Satan is here, but God is near!

Satan is here, but God is near! Satan is here, but God is near!

You!

I know you're behind this.

Because I have seen you.

I know what you really are.

What I am is annoyed. Just let me go to my club and move along, please.

I know these murders are your doing!

I have no skeletons in my closet, which is more than can be said for you nasty little humans.
So come on, preacher man, enough about me, let's talk about your dark and nasties, shall we?

I must throw you into a lake of sulfur and fire.

Oh, so you want to destroy me.Well, get in line.

Yes, I wish...

Yes.

I never met you.

It's like some kind of collective amnesia. I mean, I walk around this city of yours, solving its filthy little crimes, and this is the thanks I get?

You're a m*rder*r.

A m*rder*r!

Stop blaming me!

I should destroy you.

Man: Hey, put him down!

Malcolm: Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Easy, easy. Hey, hey, hey, hey.

This scumbag isn't worth it, all right?

This isn't over.

(chuckles)

You come to have a go at me as well?

Nah.

Chloe thought you might need protection from freaks like that. What I want is a drink.

DAN: Hey, I'm sorry about earlier.

Earlier today, or three weeks ago, when you broke up with me in a text?

DANIEL: Chloe, I know. I've been looking for a way to explain things, but nothing makes sense.
I will fix this, though, I promise.

CHLOE: No more promises. I just want to do our jobs.

What's that?

(siren wailing)

(indistinct radio transmission)

This definitely doesn't belong here. A monogrammed "M."

DAN: Doesn't Lucifer wear cuff links?

Realy? No prints, no skin cells?

Nope. Dead end.

Unless you want to check Lucifer's closet for the match.

Very funny.

Yo, Decker, your partner's on TV.

Newscaster: A video went viral today after a fight erupted on Hollywood Boulevard.

Local club owner Lucifer Morningstar att*cked Reverend Jacob Williams when Williams claimed the businessman with the devilish name was actually involved in the Satanic murders making recent headlines.

Apparently, I'm not the only one.

This is ridiculous. He didn't att*ck the guy.He was defending himself.

Still hot.

Sorry.

The preacher.

Preacher's wearing a cuff link.

So what?

A lot of guys do.

One?

With an "M"?

Dan: No way.

Oh...

It's not an "M."

It's a "W," for Williams.

Come on, Dan, it makes sense. Who's gonna want to k*ll Satanists more than a religious zealot?

We gotta find him.

Malcolm: Freakin' street preacher and his little minions, man.

Who do they think they are?

Bunch of posers. (chuckles)

Ah...

Don't even sweat it, huh?

What do you say we get some ladies up in here, huh?

Blow off some steam!

Emphasis on the "blow," huh?

(chuckling)

Why are you in my house?

Because I got your back, man.

I saw the way they treated you at the crime scene.

Anyways, I know you didn't k*ll those people.

Did you?

(laughing) I'm just joking! God...

You need to relax, get yourself a little shiatsu.

Mmm.

Ah...

This feels good.

Feels good, hanging out here with you.

I mean, ever since I, you know, went to Hell, it's just... there's been things in my head that no one would understand.

Except you, of course.

You know?

I just want you to know...

I respect the hell out of you.

(giggles)

Get it?

Hell? (laughs)

Up top.

What, you just gonna leave me hanging?

You've got red paint on your hand.

Huh?

Just like the paint we found at the warehouse.

I must've gotten it on me at the scene.

Oh, I doubt that.

LUCIFER: Everyone was wearing gloves.

Aw, man! You caught me! Literally red-handed. (laughs) Oh, I was, I was wondering when you'd figure it out. You know, when I asked if you did it? Totally thought you were gonna ask me.

Been dying all day to tell you.

You?

Uh-huh.

You did this? You k*lled those people?

Oh, you mean those frauds?

Duh! So, what do you... what do you think? Impressed? Hmm?

You're insane.

I know! It's...Don't you love it?

I mean, of course you do. I mean, we're the same.

Oh, we are not the same.

Wait, wait, wait. I-If you're worried, I've got the perfect person to pin it on: that street preacher.

Genius, right? Guy's crazy. Yeah.

And I already dropped some evidence, so it's...

Whoa!

But I did this for you.

Aren't you happy?

Why would I be happy? I'm not evil. I punish evil.

Yeah, but, but you're, you know...

The Devil, yes. And you think you know who that is, don't you? The whole world does.
A torturer, maybe. An inflictor of just desserts, sure. But a senseless m*rder*r I am not.
Perhaps I need to clarify my position.

Hey, hold on, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

I've got this, remember?

(laughs)

Don't worry, Malcolm.

I'm not gonna send you to Hell. I'm going to bring it right to you.
And after I'm finished with you, Detective Decker can put you in a cold, dark room so you can think about what you've done, young man.

Oh...

(both laughing)

(whimpering)

Ah!

Amenadiel: Why don't you pick on someone your own size?

After the monumentally dreadful day I've had, you decide to drop in now? I'm clearing up your mess, by the way, so if you don't mind.

AMENADIEL: You sent your demon to seduce me and then k*ll me.

(Lucifer chuckles)

Amenadiel: Yeah.

I definitely mind.

Right.

Wonderful. Now look what you've done. The man you just freed... you know, the one you raised from the dead... he's murdering humans.
And that... that is on your hands, brother.

You're wrong. It's your fault. Oh...It always has been.

Hate to break it to you, bro... (grunts) but this time, I'm fighting back.

(grunting)

AMENADIEL: If only you'd done what was asked of you, none of this would've happened, and I'd still be home... (grunts) where I belong!

LUCIFER: Heaven? Really? You're sure that's still home, eh?
After everything you've done? Sleeping with a demon. Think Dad might have another assignment for you. Somewhere, I don't know, slightly warmer.

(yells)

Why? Why did you have to use her?

(laughs)

Now I get what this little tantrum's really about. It's about Maze.

You like her. Well, I mean, I don't blame you, brother. She is a wild woman in the sack.

Listen, if you wanted me dead, you should've had the balls to do it yourself!

Oh, please. You're the one who's been using pawns from the start.
Linda, Malcolm, huh? Now the detective.
You're a coward!

Chloe? I don't even know what you're talking about!

You always were a lousy liar. You justify it all, don't you?Claim it's all done in the name of our father, but... it's for your sake, brother.

And they call me the prideful one.

Enough!

I'm the pawn. You both used me.

You know what?

Here.

k*ll each other.

(sighs)

Now where do I get a drink?

The last place the preacher was seen was near LUX.

Remember, he's to be considered armed and dangerous.

Malcolm took Lucifer into the club.

You guys see anything, you get on the radio.

All right, I'll check the club.

You guys search the area.

♪ ♪
♪ I was looking for you ♪
♪ In all the right places ♪

Mmm.

Hello, Detective.

If you've come to have a sh*t at me, now's the time.

Everyone's doing it.

Yeah, your scuffle with the preacher made the local news.

(laughs)

Oh, that.

That was about five disasters ago.

God, your face...

Yeah, well, what can I say?

You should've seen the other chap.

Thought I did.

What happened?

(scoffs) Well... where do I begin?

With the grandest fall in the history of time?

Or perhaps the far more agonizing punishment that followed?

To be blamed for every morsel of evil humanity's endured, every atrocity committed in my name?

♪ Trying to impress you ♪

As though I wanted people to suffer.

All I ever wanted was to be my own man here.

To be judged for my own doing.

And for that?

I've been shown how truly powerless I am.

That even the people I trusted... the one person, you... (sighs sadly) could be used to hurt me.

Lucifer...

Yes?

(laughing) What?

Put your hands up and move away from the bar.

Detective, there's an explanation...

Stop!

Don't say another word.

Put your hands up.

Or you'll leave us no choice.

Lucifer Morningstar, you're under arrest.