01x21 - Video Date

♪ Da, da, da-ba-da, da, da ba-da-ba-da-ba ♪
♪ Da, da, da-ba-da, da, da Let's go! ♪
♪ We'll be there ♪
♪ a wink and a smile and a great, old time ♪
♪ yeah, we'll be there ♪
♪ wherever we are, there's fun to be found ♪
♪ we'll be there when you turn that corner ♪
♪ when you jump out the bush ♪
♪ with a big bear hug and a smile ♪
♪ we'll be there ♪

[Birds chirping]

Grizz: One, two.

One, two. One, two.

W-W-W-Whoa! What's going on? [Cellphone clicking]

Dude, what are you doing?

Sorry.

Pay attention, man. One, two.

You guys, guess what happened just now.

You stopped rowing. Canoe started spinning.

Nope. I matched this amazing girl on an online dating site.

She's French! Like the kissing.

Stop talking. We're gonna sink.

Oh, sorry.

One, two. All right, we're almost there, guys.

One, two. One, two.

W-W-W-Whoa! No, no, no, no, no, no!

No! No!

Yes! I can't believe this!

Celine messaged me ... she messaged me! Look!

Whoa. Dude, congratulations.

You finally did it, man.

[Laughs] Aww, shucks.

What will you do in France?

Uh, I don't know.

But it's going to be the most romantic experience of my life.

[French music playing]

[Birds chirping] Ahh.

So, what'd she say?

Oh.

She says "hi."

Well, say something.

Uh, uh, what do I say?

Start with a joke.

I don't know any jokes.

Okay, here, here, here. I got one.

Why do French people eat snails?

Um, okay.

'Cause they don't like fast food.

Ha, that's a good one.

Whoa! She likes it!

Man, she sounds like a cool lady.

You're totally in.

Okay, okay, now what?

Throw in some thingies.

Thingies?

Yeah, you know, the shapes and stuff.

You know?

Ice Bear's got this.

You're welcome.

Ooh.

She thinks I'm cute.

All: Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Oh, we did it! You write me in Paris, okay?

I will, brother.

Uh, guys, she's asking me what my job is.

She's gonna hate me if I tell her that I don't really do anything.

Hey, you don't tell her that, man.

Help me!

All right. Let me do this for you.

Hey, hey, where are you going?

French people love art.

What? Stop! What are you doing?

No, don't send it! Stop!

[Groans]

What did I tell you? She's loving your talent.

Boom!

This is amazing.

But ... But what am I gonna say to her?

It's, I mean...

Dude. What are you worried about?

You have us. We got you, bro.

Ice Bear will coach you into manhood.

[Voice breaking] Thank you, guys. I love you.

It's okay. You'll be all right.

[Crickets chirping]

All right, she's calling. You got this, buddy.

[Clears throat] Hello, Celine.

It is so good to finally meet you.

[French accent] Oh, hello, Panda.

What a lovely room you have, Panda.

Oh, thanks.

[Normal voice] And cut. Awesome, bro. I have a couple notes.

First of all, never say, "hello." "Hello" is too safe.

Think of something cooler, like, "hi, there," or, uh, "heyyyy."

Oh, okay, one more thing.

Grizz? You okay?

Boom! Your computer froze.

Just try to stay calm.

[Computer chiming]

All right, it's showtime, people. Places, everyone!

We only got one take, so let's make it count!

[Computer chiming]

[French accent] Let's see. I think it's on. There we go.

Panda? Bonjour, Panda!

So great to finally see you!

Um, hello. Ooh.

[Gasps]

[whispers] No "hellos." "Heyyyy."

Uh, howdy. Uh, no.

No, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait. What's up?

[Laughs] Oh, Panda. You are so funny.

Oh, that was way too close.

Panda: Um, hi, I'm...

[Speaking gibberish]

I'm having a little trouble understanding you, Panda.

This doesn't look good. Okay, time for plan "B."

It must be my computer.

Maybe we could talk some other time.

No, no, no, no, no, no! Um, I'm ... I'm ...

Um, uh...

Everything ... fantastic ... Celine ... I am happy!

Also ... I ... love ... anime!

Oh, yeah. I could see that in your art.

I, uh, tried to do art once, but no, no.

[Chuckles] That was a bad idea.

[Laughter]

[Laughter continues]

[Laughs] What else do you do?

Yoga ... and ... karaoke.

[Laughs] That's awesome.

So, how about we play a little game?

I will say words, and you will say the first thing that comes into your mind, okay? Favorite food.

Pizza.

Favorite book.

"The wizard's guide to love"!

Favorite type of movie?

Romantic comedy!

Okay, final question.

What do you see as your biggest weakness?

[silent]

[whispers] What's going on?

Oh, I am terribly sorry if I asked a personal question.

That was a game taught to me by american friends, but we don't talk anymore. [laughter]

[Laughter continues]

Uh, okay. That wasn't a joke, but...

I, uh, will be right back.

This is not working, Grizz.

Listen, this is all gonna be fine.

Catch your breath, and then when you're ready, you just tag back in and take it home.

Wait, what do you mean, "tag back in"?

Ice Bear ready ... [clears throat] Panda ready to make good impression.

Oh, you missed a spot. All right, break a leg.

Celine: Oh, there you are, Panda.

By the way, let me know if I say something that doesn't make sense. My English is not the best.

Panda pense que votre Anglais est trã¨s belle.

[Gasps] Oh, Panda!

I did not know you knew how to speak French.

Oui, c'est ce qui nous rend unique.

Oh, Panda, vous etes une boite de mystaires.

You are so interesting, Panda. I've never met anyone like you.


[French music playing]

What else can you tell me about yourself?

Uh, Ice ... Ice Bear sleeps in fridge.

What? Who is Ice Bear?

Oh, no, he's blowing it! Grizz, where are you?!

Grizz: [clears throat]

Got your back, man.

Grizz, what happened to you?

Grizz: "Evenly distribute the mixture onto hair. Make sure to apply to the roots first."

Ooh. [Laughs] That tingles.

And I'll bleach myself again if I have to because that is what brothers do.

Ice Bear panda bear.

Hey, hey, hey! What up?

Uh... Enough about me.

Tell me more about you.

Like, what things do you like? Do you have a brother?

How big is your family? All the good stuff.

Oh, well, sure. Well, I love going to the movies.

One of my guilty pleasures is watching american action films.

Let me show you something.

I got it online very cheap.

[Gasps] No way. I love "Action buddies."

"We're closer than brothers."

Both: "We are buddies!"

[Laughs] Let me see.

I have two sisters. I'm the oldest one, So I'm always making sure that they are okay.

I would do anything for my sisters.

Yeah, I'd bleach anything for my brothers.

I love your eye contact. You have the most beautiful eyes.

And the eyes are the window to the heart, don't you think?

I do think.

[French music playing]

[Electric violin playing]

Yeah! I have no idea what Paris looks like!

I can see that!

I do think. I do think...

[whispers] Grizz! Grizz!

I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere. [Laughs]

What is it?

I think I'm ready to continue the date.

Sorry, Panda. I'm afraid I can't do that.

What?! Why?

I'm in love with her! She's amazing!

She likes action films. I like action films.

She's the oldest sister. I'm the oldest sister.

No, Grizz, you can't do this! She's my date.

Ice Bear ready for round two.

No, no, you're not! You can't! She's ...

Celine: Panda? Panda, are you there?

Both: Yes!

[whispers] We can't blow our cover.

I'm going to get some water. I'll be right back.

No, it's my turn!

She's mine!

We have a real connection!

Please!

So, where were we? Where's the laptop?

[Panting]

Celine: Sorry about that.

Oh!

Oh, [chuckles] hi, Celine. Uh, just give me a second.

Celine: No worries.

Ahh. Finally, we're alone.

Weren't we always alone?

Um, yes?

[Doorknob rattling]

I just needed some fresh air. The bathroom is designed for privacy.

I can't ...

Is everything okay? [Laughs]

Yup, want to check out my toothbrush? Mine's the one in the cup.

That's good. My toothbrush is blue, also.

Curse you, Panpan!

I'm Panpan!

Huh?

Ice ... uh, panda bear writes poetry.

Mon coeurs, mon coeurs, tu me manque...

[muffled banging]

Aah!

Huh?

[Clattering]

Aah! [Panting]

Hi, Celine. Don't the stars look lovely?

What do you mean? Are you outside?

Oh, here, let me help you.

Ahh, I see.

[Gasping]

Uh, come on, Celine. I know where there's an even better view.

[Grunts]

[Panting]

[Laughs] Isn't this a lot better?

[Garbled] You are...

Aah! No, no, no! No!

No! Aah!

[Groans] Aah!

[Grunting] Curse you, Panpan!

Oh, there you are. The internet seems to be working.

[Sighs, chuckles]

Uh, are you okay?

Yeah. Technical difficulties.

Um, you seem busy. Maybe we should talk another time.

No, no, no.

I think it would be best.

Please don't hang up!

[Chainsaw whirring]

Celine, I ... I love you!

[All grunting] Move!

Panda!

[Grunting continues]

Stop, stop! Arretez!

What is going on? Pourquoi are there three of you?

Um, well ...

I don't understand. Was this all some kind of joke?

[Sighs] No.

I was just so nervous that you wouldn't like me, and...

[Sighs] it was my fault. I'm sorry.

My brothers were just trying to help.

I pretended I was something I wasn't.

And then we pretended to be him pretending to be something he wasn't.

Ice Bear est dã©solã©.

Listen, I suppose I have a confession to make, as well.

Really?

Oui. I have also been pretending.

I'm not really French.

All: Huh?

[New Jersey accent] Yeah, I'm from Jersey.

My dating profile auto-corrected my hometown "Paramus" to "Paris," and I just went with it.

I guess we were both nervous.

So... does this mean you want a second date?

Or third?

Ice Bear wants fourth through tenth.

Oh, no, no, no.

The love between brothers is too important.

You all seem like a good team.

All right, I should get going.

It was really nice meeting you all. Take care.

[Computer chimes]

[all sigh]

You know, she's right. We do make a good team.

Grizz: Two! One, two! One...

[Cheering]

[Laughs] Yeah!

We did it!