02x10 - The Verdict

Episode transcripts for the 2014 TV show "Red Oaks". Season 2 premiered November 11, 2016.*
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"Red Oaks" is a coming-of-age comedy, set in the 1980s, about a college student enjoying a last hurrah during the summer between his sophomore and junior years of college.
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02x10 - The Verdict

Post by bunniefuu »

There you go.

Okay. Thank you.

Anything you can do to move this along.

Okay, I'll do my best.

Thank you.

All right.

How is this guy? Usually on time?

Sam: More or less.

It pisses me off the way doctors...

They keep you waiting, keep you waiting.

Like their time is more valuable than ours.

Right? Pricks.

Hi. Small world.

Sam Myers.

Myers. Help me out here.

David's father.

Oh, for goodness sake. How are you?

How are you?

Good.

Have we ever actually met?

Briefly.

I recognize you from the papers.

Yeah, well...

Something serious, or just a checkup?

No, my wife forced me to come down here. How about yourself?

Bad ticker. Had a heart att*ck last summer.

No sh*t.

Uh-huh.

What was that like?

Like Shelley Winters is sitting on your chest.

And I'm not talking "Place in the Sun" Shelley Winters.

"Poseidon Adventure."

Yeah.

So how did that... What? Were there warning signs?

I'm a 57-year-old Jew, my entire life is a warning sign.

So now what? What does this guy have you do?

You, like, on a low-sodium diet, or...

No smoking. Watch the stress.

Watch the stress. They always tell you watch the stress.

How the f*ck do you watch stress?

I got a cat.

Also a divorce.

Oh, I didn't... I'm sorry to hear that.

It's all right. It happens.

Yep.

Although, it's funny.

In my parent's day, when two spouses were having trouble, they just moved the Barcalounger a few inches further apart.

Fewer lawyers then.

You and Skye's mom, you're still together, right?

Yeah. Just had our anniversary, actually... 25 years.

Twenty-five years. Wow.

Twenty-five. Yep.

That's something in today's day and age.

How about that?

Woman: Mr. Passarello?

So our kids are on the outs, huh?

So I hear.

Any idea what happened?

Nobody tells me anything.

Although I gotta say, my daughter, I love her to death, she can be quite a pain in the ass sometimes.

Oh, please. My David? Don't get me started.

He's no Prince Charming.

(chuckles)

Moody kid.

Moody.

Oh, my God, like his mother... although he's a very hard worker, self-motivated, a real self-starter.

All right, all right. I get it.

I get it. He told you I offered him a job?

He did.

Yeah.

I'm very grateful.

No. Listen, my pleasure.

He's a good kid.

It's very generous of you.

Well, he's a good kid when he's not tripping over his own d*ck.

Mr. Getty?

Here we go. That's me.

All right. Nice talking to you.

Good luck.

A little checkup.

No, I mean...

I mean with the trial.

Yeah, okay.

We were able to get you in earlier.

Yeah. All right. Thank you.

Hey!

Hey, Doug!

Fay!

What do you say, Wes?

I hope I can count on your vote today.

Just now.

You're the best. You're a good man.

Love to Rachel, huh?

Will do.

Take care.

(gulps)

Can't wait till this election's over.

I can stop pretending I give a sh*t about people.

Oh, my God. Enough with the f*cking election already.

I don't think you've noticed, but we got other problems.

What's the matter with your salad?

I'm not hungry.

Want a bite of mine?

How can you eat?

What?

What's gonna happen to us if you go to jail?

Conjugal visits.

You know.

You think this is funny?

Do you?

Bunch of pervy inmates watching us while we...

Sweetie.

Oh, my God.

Listen to me. Look at me.

We're gonna be fine.

I got a good feeling about this.

It's breaking our way. It's already breaking...

You saw how my guys destroyed those state witnesses, right?

We're fine. Trust me.

Don't even worry.

Hey, don't eat my fries.

I could eat whatever I want.

Yes, you ca...

Excuse me. Do me a favor. Take this gerbil food away.

Bring my wife a cheeseburger.

Be right back.

I love you so much.

Don't you leave me. Promise me.

You gonna...

I promise.

Yeah?

Don't you worry.

So you given any more thought of coming to work for me?

Actually, I have.

And?

And... as much as I appreciate the offer...

I think I'm gonna have to decline, respectfully.

(chuckles) Okay. May I ask why?

Well, I just don't think I'd be any good at it.

Or happy.

Happy?

Okay.

Let me see if I can explain this to you.

Happy is how you feel when you go to your kids' dance recital, or you see McEnroe swearing at a line judge.

That's happy.

It's not something you expect from your work.

Why do think they call it work? They don't call it chuckles.

Because it doesn't make you happy.

I'm sorry, Mr. Getty.

You're serious?

Yeah.

Okay.

All right.

Is that how you wanna end up?

You wanna be 40, chasing f*cking balls around a court?

He's not 40 yet.

What?

Not till Friday.

You being a wiseass now?

No. No, sir.

Okay.

I should have trusted my first instinct about you.

Think I'm getting soft in my old age.

(baby fussing)

(gasps) Judy!

(chuckles)

Oh, my God. He's gorgeous.

Look at those cheeks.

(chuckles)

How do you feel?

Tired.

Don't worry.

That only lasts about another 18 to 20 years.

Oh!

(laughs)

Oh!

Yes.

Oh, um, where should I put these?

Just over there with the others. Thanks.

Okay.

Oh, Margot was here?

Yeah, you just missed her.

Good.

I feel bad.

You know, I haven't called her.

Oh, don't worry about Margot. She's a big girl.

And not the type to wait by the phone.

Want some cookies?

Sam stopped by with them.

My Sam?

Mm-hmm.

How do you know my ex-husband?

We play poker every Tuesday night.

He's a great guy.

Hmm?

No thanks.

(baby crying)

Do you wanna hold him?

Oh, can I?

Of course.

Oh! Get out of the way.

Wanna say hi to Judy?

Hi.

Hello.

Hi.

Oh, hello, handsome.

Oh, hello.

Enjoy this moment.

It goes so fast.

Help yourself to my fries. I'm going for a steam.

What time are you meeting Ganz?

He said 5:00.

You think he'll go for it?

I don't know. I hope so.

(sighs)

Hey, Ganz.

Thanks for agreeing to meet with me.

Flash the Bat-Signal, I appear.

(wings flutter)

Yeah, I'll admit, I was surprised to hear from you.

Yeah, well, you see, me and my very best friend, we needed a big, fat favor.

Interesting.

Let's talk.

Okay, here's one for Dr. Feinberg.

And one for Douglas Getty.

One for Dr. Feinberg.

And one for Douglas Getty.

One for Dr. Feinberg.

Any more?

No.

Okay, then, let's get the tally.

Dr. Feinberg has 116 votes.

And the tally for Mr. Getty is...

Congratulations, Mr. President.

Yeah!

f*ck. This sucks.

You won by 28 votes.

I'll take it.

Thank you, Herb.

Congratulations, Doug. You ran a hard race.

Hey. And to you.

(pager beeping)

Gotta run. I got a thing.

I'm sure you do.

(chuckles)

So conventional wisdom is to start with "Blood and Black Lace."

But for my money, Ben, the best entry point for Italian exploitation cinema?

"Bay of Blood."

Also known as "Twitch of the Death Nerve."

Oh, and then you're gonna do a double-feature... "Lizard in a Woman's Skin," and "Don't t*rture a Duckling."

And then you're ready for "il maestro di giallo," Dario Argento.

Hey, look what the cat coughed up.

Hey.

What, are you cutting some wedding footage or something?

Actually, I stopped by to talk to you about something.

Oh, uh, Ben, get me some ice cream.

What's up?

Yeah, I've given a lot of thought to coming to work here, and...

Yeah.

...I think I'm gonna have to pass.

I get it.

Not that I don't appreciate the offer.

I do. It's just...

I don't see myself working in TV.

Yeah, well, who does?

You think I wanted to work in television?

No?

No.

I wanted to make movies.

Soon as I graduated from college, I packed up my car, drove out to Tinsletown.

That's where the action is... or was.

Now all the maverick auteurs are in New York City.

How long were you out there?

Seven years.

I worked every job I could get in the industry.

Mail room, drove a tour van.

I even spent a summer dressing up as John Wayne for tourists outside Grauman's Chinese.

You mean like a celebrity impersonator?

We prefer the term "tribute artists."

Anyway, I fell into TV production out there, and I discovered it suited my skills better and my circadian rhythms as I'm not a fan of daylight.

It's another reason I left L.A.

Makes sense.
Right? Better.

Yeah.

You see it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You got the eye.

So what are you gonna do next?

I'm still trying to figure it out.

Yeah.

I'm not much for giving advice.

I leave that to the professionals like Rhonda, Dr. Ruth.

But I'll tell you this.

You're not gonna figure it out here.

I mean, don't get me wrong. It's a nice town.

You can raise a family here, meet other camera enthusiasts, swap Polaroids of your ex-wives.

If that's your thing, great.

But if your thing is making movies, it's not happening in Jersey.

Okay.

Thank you.

I've just been told the jury has completed its deliberations and has reached a verdict.

I tell you, I'm getting quite claustrophobic.

Thought you sleep with an eye mask.

Yes, but that's different.

I'm sleeping, and it's satin and stylish and doesn't reek of scrotum.

I had three uncles m*rder*d in this exact fashion.

Right. We're almost there.

All right.

Oh...

Happy 40th, Nash.

(cheering)

You bought me a boat?

Rented you a boat.

From the both of us.

(laughing)

Let's go, gents!

(chuckles)

("Run Runaway" by Slade)

♪ If you've got a crush ♪
♪ Don't b*at around the bush ♪
♪ When I've got a crush ♪
♪ Run runaway ♪
♪ See chameleon ♪
♪ Lying there in the sun ♪
♪ All things to everyone ♪
♪ Run runaway ♪

(cheering)

I think we really surprised him.

Totally!

Still don't know how you convinced Ganz to let us rent his boat.

Kind of agreed to be his inside guy at Cornell.

Oh, sh*t.

It's cool.

I told him I'd only deal weed.

I don't like to think of it as selling an illegal substance so much as providing a public service.

How's that?

People up there seriously stress.

(chuckles)

♪♪

Oh, whoa, cool.

Hey, it's Herb!

Hi, guy! What's your poison?

How about a Sex on the Beach? You know how to make one of those?

Make it two.

Okay.

So, what are you and Misty gonna do?

I don't know.

Try to make the whole long-distance thing work, I guess.

I mean, Ithaca's only four hours away.

It's not like it's the moon.

Or Paris.

Exactly.

You know, sometimes I think things with Skye were best when we were thousands of miles apart.

Wow. That's crazy.

Okay, here we go.

Oh, nice!

Thank you, Herb.

It's nine dollars.

This isn't a Sex on the Beach.

No, it isn't. Vodka tonic.

But if you drink enough, you may have sex on a boat.

Let's get drunk.

I don't mind if I do. It's my birthday.

Oh, dear. What seems to be the matter, Skip?

Oh, my God.

Seasick.

Seasick?

We're docked.

It doesn't matter.

And we're on a river.

Oh, God.

(vomits)

The minnows will be feasting tonight.

Are there girls looking?

Oh, yes.

Every single girl on this deck is looking at you right now.

It's okay. He's just vomiting.

Would you like a little bubbly to settle the tummy?

No, thank you.

All right.

Whoa! This yacht is bigger than my house.

Hey, wanna mess around?

Now?

Yeah.

No, thanks.

Oh.

Pretty please.

What's wrong?

Nothing.

Come on, tell me.

What's gonna happen to us, Wheeler?

What do you mean?

I mean, when you go to school.

Nothing. I mean, sure, it'll be a little tough that first year while I'm up there and you're still here finishing your degree.

But we'll visit each other and talk all the time... and have a ton of phone sex.

Mostly on nights and weekends when rates are lower.

Mm-hmm. (chuckles)

Until you meet some smart girl and forget all about me?

It's not gonna happen.

You have to be very quiet.

I'm so quiet, I'm a mouse.

(both chuckle)

Judge: Would the jury foreman please rise?

Has the jury reached a unanimous verdict?

We have, Your Honor.

Will the defendant please rise?

On the counts of insider trading, securities and mail fraud, and providing false statements to the government, the jury finds Douglas Getty...

Guilty on all counts.

The jury is thanked and excused.

Court is dismissed.

(gavel pounds)

(soft gasps)

It'll be okay.

It'll all be okay. It's gonna be okay, sweetheart.

Okay?

I love you.

I'm gonna take her outside for some air.

That's a good idea. Come here.

Okay.

It's okay. It's okay.

How did you know?

Know what?

To come today. How did you know the verdict was coming down today?

David told me.

It's gonna be okay.

Yeah.

There he is, the birthday boy!

Having fun?

Beep, bom, bom! Oh, my boychiks!

Fun does not begin to describe it.

This is a day that I will remember for the rest of my life, even if I live to be 100 years old.

Which, by the way, a lot of the men in my family actually do, once they lay off the sweets and the vengeful women.

Thank you, boychiks.

Ahoy! Well, well, well!

Looks like someone's got their sea legs back.

Yeah, I had some Captain Morgan's, a little gin, club soda.

Feel a lot better.

In fact.

Come on down here, buddy.

Turn and burn.

(sighs)

Another summer, huh?

Yeah.

Think you'll be back to Red Oaks next year?

I barely know what I'm doing next week, let alone next summer.

It's gonna happen for you, dude.

I feel it.

Maybe.

I know one thing, though.

It's not happening here in Jersey.

Hey, pizza's here. Grabbed you a slice.

That is why I love you.

You do?

Uh, yeah, sure.

But, you know, don't feel like you have to say it back or anything.

Eat your pizza. Watch the sunset.

You got enough room?

Because your mom and I could follow in the Volvo.

Thanks, I got it.

Hey hey hey! There he is!

Big man on campus!

Hey, Mr. Myers, Mrs. Myers!

Ah! Sorry! I mean Rosen.

No, call us Sam and Judy.

Actually, Mr. Myers still works for me.

All right. I'm sorry, I can't really stay too long.

I got my own packing to do.

(both) Oh.

When do classes start?

Monday.

Good for you.

Very good. Very proud of you.

Thank you, Sam and Judy... I mean Mr. Myers.

You're really doing this!

I know. It's crazy.

It's awesome! I'm psyched for you.

Making that leap.

I'm psyched for you too, Mr. Ivy League.

Hey, you ever get a hankering for the campus life, you know my dorm room's always open.

Oh, definitely. Soon as I'm settled, I'm coming up.

Cool.

Cool.

Cool.

Cool.

Cool.

Cool.

(chuckles)

Bye-bye.

What?

Humor us.

It's an emotional moment, especially for your ma.

My baby.

Mom, come on. It's not like I'm moving to Guam.

I love you.

(sighs)

Honey, I know I can be a pain in the ass sometimes, and I ride you too much, but I'm your dad.

It's my job.

I know.

I love you.

I love you, too.

Bye!

(engine starts)

You okay?

Yeah, I'm okay.

Good.

Because I'll lay you even money that he's back on one of our couches in the next few months.

Oh, Sam.

I wish I understood what he was doing, but truth is I haven't got a clue.

Me neither.

Think he's making a mistake?

I don't know.

Me neither.

Maybe we should let him.

(phone ringing)

Hey, it's David. I'm not here right now.

Please leave a message after the beep. (beep)

Skye: Hey, it's me.

I got your number from your dad.

I, um, I just wanted to call and say that I watched your tape of Paris, and I loved it.

Uh, so... you can probably imagine things are pretty crazy around here.

My dad's lawyers are appealing.

Oh, and believe it or not, I am taking a studio art class at the New School.

Yeah, I know.

But my professor's really great.

And I'm enjoying it.

So, um, I have to go, but... I don't know. I just wanted to call and say that I'm happy that you finally got your place in the city.

I bet you're really excited.

Maybe we'll run into each other sometime.

Okay. Bye.

("I Still Believe" by the Call)

Man: Make it up.

As we go along.

Mmm.

♪ I've been in a cave ♪
♪ For 40 days ♪
♪ Only a spark ♪
♪ To light my way ♪
♪ I want to give out ♪
♪ I want to give in ♪
♪ This is our crime ♪
♪ This is our sin ♪
♪ But I still believe ♪
♪ I still believe ♪
♪ Through the pain ♪
♪ And through the grief ♪
♪ Through the lies ♪
♪ Through the storms ♪
♪ Through the cries ♪
♪ And through the wars ♪
♪ Oh, I still believe ♪

(vocalizing)

(music ends)
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