01x06 - Please Refrain from Crying

[Door opens]

♪ There are monsters here ♪
♪ there are ♪
♪ oooh oooh ooh ♪
♪ and the faces I once knew ♪
♪ they fade, they fade ♪
♪ they fade, they fade ♪
♪ they fade, they fade ♪
♪ they fade ♪
♪ and I walk alone ♪
♪ oooh ♪
♪ there are monsters here ♪
♪ there are ♪
♪ oooh ♪

Wait, wait, wait.

♪ Ooooooh ♪
♪ oooh oooh oooh ♪
♪ and the faces I once knew ♪



♪ They fade, they fade ♪
♪ they fade, they fade ♪
♪ they fade, they fade ♪
♪ they fade, they fade ♪


♪ And I walk alone ♪
♪ oooh ♪
♪ and the ones I long to see ♪
♪ are lost to me ♪
♪ are lost to me ♪
♪ are lost to me ♪

[Door closes]

I feel like you're still mad at me.

I'm not happy.

Yeah, I can tell.

You haven't said two flippin' words to me.

Are you still mad?

You know, I'm more disturbed, Keith.

To be fair...

I wasn't even sexually aroused.

What difference does that make, man?

It's a big difference whether or not you're regular or sexually aroused.

Jesus, Keith.

Look, Ryan, I didn't mean to disrespect you, and especially not that way in front of Lisa.

I'm... I would never...

[laughs] Sorry I'm late, guys.

Man: Don't sweat it, man.

Keith: You worried about seeing your parents today?


You want to know what I think?

I think...

I think that they're gonna be happy to see you.

They're gonna want to visit you all the time.

I can't wait to meet them.



[Clears throat]

So, Keith, I heard you have a tiny rig.


"Tiny rig"? [Scoffs]

Okay, Michael. What's that mean?

Your pecker.

See, everybody saw it when you flashed Ryan's girl.

You know, I heard that it's like... a baby bird in a nest.

Just a tiny little thing.

Like a stack of buttons.


I admire you, bro. I mean, that is one hell of a cross to bear.


What's that?

I said thank... this is... this is our table.

Oh, right. Right, right.

I'm... sorry, guys.

[Breathing heavily]

It's because I wasn't aroused.

Wasn't even erect, so why would...

He wasn't even there.

What, is... like his dick's so great.


You look great.


Jay's gonna come by the gym and pick it up.

It is his money from the fight.

It's a little light.

There's got to be a better way to make a living.

I'm gonna talk to him today about Nate.

You want to stop this?

Stop what?

Come on.

This was your idea.

I told... I told you to go talk to him.

I didn't tell you to go take a day trip and see his parents.

Do you think this is what I want to do today?

Do you have any f*cking idea what I'm walking into?

Oh, no, you don't, because you weren't there.

You wanted me to help him and this is what he needs, so stop moping around and acting like we're going off to Hawaii to f*ck our brains out.

Is that for me?


Blueberries, banana, almond milk, some protein powder.


Blueberries make my mouth itch.

That's why you've never seen me eat one.

Have a great day with his parents!

[Door slams]

Thank you.

Yeah, ma.

You know what I should do?

I should cook you guys dinner.

That's a beautiful idea.

It'll be fun.

I'll walk to the store.

Why don't you just put together a list and I'll go?

Oh, Jay.

What are you gonna do, crate me?

I'm not gonna run away.

Nate can go with me.

I can't. I... I got physical therapy.

Well, then, I'll go with you.

And then afterwards we can go to the store.

Guys, I'm just feeling a little cooped up.

You know, like I've been locked in the house.

Why would you feel like that, mom?



We'll all go.


Nate and I can handle it.

What are you guys hungry for?

[Door opens]

Alvey: There he is.

Now who's the movie star?


Nice shoes.


You ready for this?

Think so.

Can I give you a piece of advice?

Have no expectations.



Thanks for being cool with Lisa coming down.

Ah, it was never a question.


I wouldn't, you know, I wouldn't normally ask, but they love her.

It helps.


You're gonna be all right.

You call me when you're done.


All right?



Shut the f*ck up.

Ryan's parents live in Kern?

Yeah, why?

My dog is from Kern.

They found her litter in the crawl space of some house.

For three years, I thought she was from South Gate.

Turns out she's from Kern.

This is only the second time I've even heard of Kern.

Tell me what it's like. I've always wondered.

How do I look?

You look sweet.

We should, uh, hit it.

Enjoy Kern.

[Horn beeping]

Hey, biff.

Where are you guys going?

Actually, we're gonna go see my parents.

Oh, yeah?

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make a joke.

You look f*cking good.


Jesus. Are you going with him?

Yeah. Uh, your dad's got your money.

Okay. Well, drive safely.

And give your parents my best, Ryan.

Christina: You know, you were conceived not too far from here.

Did you know that?

I thought you and dad were living in Huntington.

Oh, Huntington. No.

No. We... we were there for like a minute when Jay was a little baby, but...

No. Who told you that?

I don't know. I just thought I knew that.


Well, the Huntington apartment was a dump.

We moved up here because I wanted to and we had this cute, little place on Speedway.

It had a little roof deck. I loved it.

Did you ever see pictures of it?

Maybe. Maybe I have.

I'll dig them out.

Well, anyway, you were delivered at Saint Joseph's because we had to move to North Hollywood when I was eight months pregnant so your dad could train some Armenian guy.

Who I think has since passed away.

I can't believe you don't know any of this.

Yeah. I just thought Ooh! it was Huntington for some reason.

Well, I guess if you want to be official, you're from the Valley.

But to me, you're from Venice.

[Knock on door]

Hey. Lisa said you have my money.

I do.

How's your hand?

It's okay.

I'm gonna get it looked at.

Lisa said you had a great fight.

[Scoffs] I don't know about that.

[Chuckles] "I don't know about that."

Since when are you so f*cking humble?

Since I started catching people in triangles.

You fought with a busted hand, you went up a weight class.

I mean, that's big-boy sh1t.

Most of these pros wouldn't do that.

Could be the beginning of something big for you.

I'm proud of you.



You stupid. [Chuckles]




I need to talk to you about something.


Come in. Shut the door.

[Door closes]

They caught the fuckers that beat up Nate.

No sh1t.


Well, that's f*cking great.

Yeah. Well, I mean, there's a... there's a little more to it than that, though.


You know what?

Let's... let's have you buy me a drink.

How about that?

You got all the money. Buy me a drink.

Does your leg hurt?

No. It's fine.

Well, you keep shifting around.

It seems like you're in pain.

Um... I have sciatica, actually.


I broke my pelvis bone a couple years ago.

In a fight?


Jay and I were messing around.

He fell back on me, and now I've got a bone floating around.

Well, are they giving you something for the pain at least?

I'm fine.

No, you should have something.

Dr. Diaz: All right, Nate. You ready to go?

Hello. I don't think we've met.

Christina. I'm Nate's mother.

Oh. I'm Dr. Diaz.

I'm gonna be taking over for Tatiana.

What happened with Tatiana?

She mess something up?

[Chuckles] No, it's nothing like that.

We rotate our therapists.

And since Nate is nearing the end of his treatment, I thought I'd just finish things up myself.

Well, I hope you know he's in a lot of pain.

He has sciatica, so whatever you can do for that...

Okay. We'll have a look.

Uh, excuse me, Miss?

I'm looking for something that says "I just got out of prison, please stop hating me," but it can't be romantic.


You have something like that?

I got this.

She's got it. Never mind. Just keep spritzing.

You're funny.

You smiled.

I said you're funny.

What, do you need me to shower you with roses?

[Cellphone vibrates]

It's f*cking Keith.

He's having trouble with one of the residents.

You mind if I grab this real quick?

What's up, Keith?

Keith: Hey, um, R... is this a bad time?

It's a very bad time, Keith, but what's going on?

Everything okay?

Well, not really.

I can't find my flip-flops.

You're calling me because you can't find your flip-flops?

I'm... but... yes.


Keith, you remember when I told you not to call me unless it was important, it was an emergency?


This is not a f*cking emergency, Keith.

I know. Right.

But I'm... I fear that this may be a prelude to an emergency because if... you know, what if Michael's behind this and he's setting me up for something worse, like, way worse, though?

I think you're looking way too deeply into this, pal. Just... just keep looking around for them, and if... if anything escalates, then call me, okay?

Okay. Um...

I got to go. Bye. Wait, Keith.

Stay off my f*cking bed.

Keith, are you on my bed?

I was earlier, but I'm not now.

Get off my bed.

Ryan, wait.

He always hangs up first.

It's both our beds.

Alvey: Point is, I should have pushed the police harder to look into these two Mexicans and I didn't.

We're not gonna let these M*therf*ckers slide, though, but we can't do anything stupid, either.

Okay? You understand?

Cops know about them now and we'll let them handle it.

Till they don't.

Yeah, you're right. You know, I don't want Nate worrying about what I'm gonna do.

Kid needs his peace.


I don't know, man. It's f*cking disturbing when you're so reasonable.

I don't trust you.

I don't trust you, either.

Two more?

Let's do it.



Dr. Diaz: How's that feel?


You're gonna make him vomit.

He needs water.


Okay, look. Let's stop.

I got it. Good job.




Here, drink this.

So, the good news is, his knee is stable.

So right now it's all about developing his strength and his lateral movement.

Did he tell you he has a piece of his pelvis floating around?

Uh, yes. Yes, ma'am, he did.

And we are looking at that very closely.

Well, it's causing him a great deal of pain, and I don't think it's a bad idea if he has some relief.

He knows.

You know, what always works for me is, uh, is just a nice, hot bath, couple scoops of epsom salts...


We are talking about a free-floating shard of bone and you think salt's gonna do the trick?

Can you even write a prescription?

I can.

Got my own pad and everything.

Hey, great job today. Keep up the good work.

Are you okay?


[Dog barking]

Lisa: Ready?

Don't you have to get back to the gym?

Nah. Joe Daddy's got it under control, Ryan's with Lisa.

Not much going on.

I saw him leave here earlier.

They're going to visit Ryan's parents?

Mm-hmm. Yeah.


That's gonna be nice and f*cked up.

[Chuckles] No sh1t.

[Jay sighs]

Let me ask your advice on something.

I got tons of that to give.

What do I got to do to fix things with Nate?

Give him up for adoption.

Oh, f*ck you. I'm asking you for real.

I can't... I can't get through to him.

He won't talk to me. He's all... closed off inside.

Can you name five things about Nate that don't have to do with fighting?

♪ Dum, dum, dum ♪ How about three things?

I got it.

Can you do three things?

I got it. I got it.

Jay: One thing. No.

Maybe his favorite food? Favorite color?

I got it.

I got it.

What shirt he likes to wear?

Look, I'm not saying he talks to me, either.

But I try to listen.

And every now and then, he opens up just a f*cking crack.

You just got to be interested.

I'm interested.

Well, it's hard to tell sometimes.

Well, I am. I am.

Jay: Dad.


You want to come over for dinner?





Boy, you really must be drunk.


For real. You should come over 'cause you should talk to Nate.



Oh, careful there, stubby.

You don't want an ingrown.


So, where's Turkey Lips?


His name's not Turkey Lips. It's Ryan.

And Ryan is out today to see his dad.

And they're not on good terms, so...

So perhaps...


So perhaps not the right time for mocking names.

Well, okay.

Forgive me.

I didn't know.

Next time.



Yeah, I know.

He needs to learn some manners.

Christina: Do you want pot roast?

Mm, Jay will want steak.

Well, what do you want?

I'm cool with whatever.

No. Nate, what do you want?

What do you like to eat?

We've got a whole store here.

Nate, food is not just fuel.

It's... you're supposed to enjoy it.

So what do you like?

Um... chicken and rice.


What? It's what I like.

Okay. Just leave it to me.

We're gonna expand your horizon.

And just so you know, I wasn't trying to pump your doctor for drugs.

It's hard for me to see you in pain, that's all.

Lisa, how have you been?

Good. I'm good.


She's running a gym with that guy Alvey.

Remember him?


I... I remember the name.

He was my coach.

Uh, you know, I used to be with him before...



Right, I remember him.


Actually, um...

I'm training with him again now.


I thought you were done with all that.

Well, I'm gonna see how it goes.

So, Marilyn, you still taking names at the poker tables?

[Chuckles] No, no.

I... I had a little game going for a while, but...

You know, it just got to be too much.

Um, why don't I go see if he's ready?

Oh, let's put the eggs on the middle shelf, and then meat goes on the bottom so if it drips, it doesn't ruin everything.

That makes a lot of sense.


So, are you gonna tell me what the real story is with Tatiana?

There's no story.

They change therapists.



You got weird when the doctor brought up her name.

No, I didn't.

You did. I saw you.

What happened? You two have a thing?

Yeah, we did.


We hung out.

Were you sleeping together?


Don't be embarrassed. I'm just asking.

Yeah, she's cool.

Didn't work. We're different.

Is she pretty?

Yeah. She's like... exotic and, like, dark hair. I don't know.

Were you attracted to her?

Really? Are we...

I'm just trying to figure out what went wrong.

I can't tell if you're upset or not.

Yeah, I feel bad.

Did you blow her off?


I mean, I... I didn't call her back a couple times because of all this.

And that was it.

She said she didn't want to see me.

It's just one of those things, you know?

Well, there will be another one.

He's ready.

It's the last door on the right.

Ryan: Okay.

Woman on television: ... physically present were not listed on the inventory.

Strong recommendations have been issued by the OIG that immediate action be taken to establish a professionally responsible firearms management program...

Hi, dad.

But the police department's response is questionable, as many...

Come on around, Ryan.

[Wheelchair whirs]

Woman 2: Uh, thank you, Elizabeth.

Well, with respect to my arms management...

Turn that crap off, huh?

... critical role in protecting America, as well as responsible and lawful distribution and record-keeping, which...

Sit down, son.


Read me something.

Lisa: Ryan's doing really well, Marilyn.

I like him in that shirt.

Yeah, right?


Reminds me of his wrestling banquets.

I told him he looked like a little boy.

Really sweet.

He does.

He does.

But I know he's still got those tattoos under there.


I died when he put that on his chest.

Well, if it makes you feel any better, I've seen a lot worse.

Are you two talking again?

No, not... like that. No.

Well, I'm sure glad you reached out, anyway.

I mean, you know, I know it's... it's a haul to get out here.

It's not exactly a trip to Paris, right?

It's fine.

I missed you guys.

Us too.

If you two had gone ahead and gotten married, who knows where we'd be.

Ryan: Who is the God...

"Who is a God like unto thee, that pardoneth iniquity, and passeth by the transgression of the remnant of his heritage?

He retaineth not his anger for ever, because he delighteth in mercy.

He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea."

Do the next one, please.

"To the lord our God belongeth mercies and forgivenesses... "

No. Not Daniel.

The one after it.

"Repent ye therefore, and be converted, that your sins... "

That's enough, Ryan.

Your mother marked those.



I'm sorry.

Hey, it's okay.

I know you are.

While I happen to believe that... that book to be full-blown horse sh1t, you are my son.

And I do forgive you.

But there's no relationship coming out of this.

There's nothing for us to do together.

No understanding to be had.


What do you suppose you and me are supposed to be talking about?

The shade of paint on the wall?

The water ring on my bedside table I can't do a damn thing about?

How's mom, you say?

She's fine.

She'd be better off if I caught pneumonia and slipped away with an empty diaper.


It's good to see you, Ryan.

I'm glad you're doing good.


[Chair whirs]

[Breathing heavily]

♪ I can't imagine the extent of what this could be ♪
♪ it's a compilation of uncertainties ♪
♪ but with such stars in those eyes ♪
♪ lie down with wondering minds ♪
♪ lately I'm on a ride ♪
♪ where I can feel alive ♪



Punk ass.

f*ck... you.

♪ In your dreams ♪
♪ in your arms♪
♪ in your tears ♪

[engine revs]

[Dog barking in distance]

What is this?


What you so dressed up for?

Well, it's suppertime, pops.

Come on in.


Look nice.




Anyways, dinner's almost ready.

Smells f*cking great in here.

Oh, yeah. It's gonna be delicious.

Dad, you remember mom, right?

Hi, Alvey.

Well, look at us, huh?

Who's hungry?



Oh, my God. I forgot about these.

I didn't. They had them at the prison canteen, so...

They always made me think about you.

When exactly did you and Alvey get together?

Why are you asking me that?

Been thinking about it.

You know when.

Yeah, I know how long. But what was the actual moment? Like... what made you fall in love with him?

I'm not talking about that.

I want to know. Just tell me, what was it?

Come on, Lisa.

There wasn't a moment. It just happened.

Man: 37 to go?

Thank you.

You want to grab these?



Nate, I understand you have a new physical therapist?


He's very nice. Little uptight.

How does she know?

I met him.

You took her to your therapist?

Yeah. She wanted to come.


This is f*cking stupid. This is ridiculous.

Can I talk to you?

Sure. Let's talk.


No problem.

What are you doing here?

I don't know what you mean.

Cut the sh1t, Christina.

What's wrong, Alvey?

You don't like this? You don't like me being a part of the world?

Oh, Jesus.

I know you don't. You hate it.

You like me abused and on my back with my feet over my head, just like you left me.

Same sh1t.

What the... why do you f*cking talk like that?

Believe it or not, Alvey, none of this has to do with you.

Jay wants me here.

What about the other son?

We had a really great day.

Did you?

I see what you're doing.

Be careful.

I see what you're doing.


f*ck this.

f*ck you.


What. f*ck you.


Hey, pops.

Po... Oh, sh1t.

You know, I... I'm sorry, pops.

I thought you wanted to be a family.

You f*cking ambushed me.

No, I invited you to dinner.

I don't know what you're trying to do here, son, but you're doing it the wrong way.

I'm try... I'm trying to show you how this is.

This is our family.

There is your problem.

This is how you think it is.

This isn't our f*cking family.

You're f*cking detached from reality.

I'm detached from reality? f*cking pops, you're like a teenager who's angry at the f*cking world.

I spent all day at the bar listening to you talking about what?

My son.

Nothing but your f*cking self, pops.

My son. My son.

"How can I can fix my son?"

Not my ex-wife.

Aw, yeah, sure.

You don't give a f*ck about your son.

You don't give a f*ck about this family.

You're f*cking lonely.

I'm lonely.


You're f*cking blind.

There's so much sh1t going on you can't even see it.

Oh, is that right?

You're trying to f*ck me up.


All right. Well, we're gonna go back and sit down and finish dinner.


Mom made a great pot roast.

[Engine revs]

You're welcome to join us, but I'm sure you're gonna get the f*ck out of here.

[Smacks lips]

[Dog barking in distance]


Ryan: Hey, thank you for today.

You're welcome.

Thanks for this. [Clears throat]

Are you gonna tell me what he said?

He said he forgives me.

See you Monday?


[Engine turns over]

Oh, hey.

[Sighs] Welcome back, Ticklebox.



Because we always make each other laugh.

We're each other's tickleboxes.

Don't ever say that again.


So, how was your day with your parents?


Yeah? Like, they were...

They were happy to see you?

I think so.


Oh, I got you something.

What, like a present?


All right. I'll close my eyes.

Ryan, when can I open my eyes?

Open them, man.




What, you don't like it?

No, it's...

Last time...

I got a bear from someone, my mom was murdered.


Can I...

I don't need another bear.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

This is a perfectly good... this is a perfectly good bear.

Totally. I'm sorry.

I don't even know what I was thinking, man. I'm so sorry.

It's okay.

It's stupid, man.

I'll get rid of it, man.

You didn't ever have a bear, did you?




How'd it go?

I don't know. I couldn't tell.

His dad forgave him, whatever that means.

How many of those have you had?


Just one.


[Shoes thud]


Christina's back.

I saw her over at the boys' house tonight.

What does she want?

She's gonna stay with them.

I don't know for how long.


[Rock music playing]

Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey.


Sorry I'm late, guys.

Well, you two are awfully quiet.

Are you boys fighting?

Nope. We're cool.

Something's weird.


Say it again?


You have to wear gloves when you work in the kitchen.

Oh, sh1t, that's right.

Fah. Bonehead.

[Snaps glove]

[Clears throat]

So, Ryan, how's your dad doing?


Heard you guys hung out earlier, so I was just...

Was that cool? Was that fun?


It was great.

Careful, there...

Keith, no!


Drop it. Drop it.

[Knife clatters]

Why'd you do that?

He was after you.


He was after you!


Shut the f*ck up.

Calm the f*ck down, okay?

Calm down, Keith. Good, good, good, good.

He was after...


Keith, Keith, Keith. Shh.

Calm down. Calm the f*ck down.

Okay? Listen to me. Listen to me.

Do exactly what I say, okay?


Don't f*cking touch this knife, okay?

All right.

Okay. Okay.

[Gurgling, gagging]


Bite down, buddy.


This is gonna hurt, okay?

[Muffled screams]





Okay. You did good, Keith. Good.

Shhh. Here we go.

Bite down. Bite down.

[Muffled screams]


I know. I know. I know.

I know, I know, I know. I know. Okay.

Michael attacked you and you were defending yourself, okay?

You got it? You understand?

Michael attacked you.


Stay put.

Somebody f*cking help in here!

Help! Help!

Michael's f*cking stabbing people, man!



You're okay. You're okay. Shh.

Michael attacked you and you were defending yourself, okay?

Michael attacked us.

Yeah, buddy. That's right.

Big, strong man. There you go.


It's okay. Shh. You're okay.

You're okay. You're okay.

You're okay, buddy. You're okay.

No, I'm not okay.