02x08 - Not Well At All

[bunniefuu]

Well, he's already half embalmed.

Let's get him up on the table and finish the job.

Can I get you anything else, Eleanor?

You can stop treating me like an invalid.

I feel much better.

I even think I might have been able to manage the ball.

I would have loved to have gone.

I was just afraid you weren't up to it physically.

I may be up to more than you realize.

Everett... I think it's time for us to rebuild our family.

Leave the light on.

Note the effect on the pupils of a few drops of adrenaline chloride.

It dilates.

So what? It's to be expected.

Is this the extent of your research?

Dr. Zinberg insisted on the incremental approach to laboratory work.

This isn't incremental.

This is immobility.

Well, there's one other thing I've been working on you might find somewhat more interesting.

Potassium chloride.

Cardiac arrhythmia.

Sorry, Bertie.

Afraid you lost bunny.

Mm-hmm.

What are you doing?

You might want to stand back.

The effect is usually instantaneous.

Now that's what you should be working on.

Dr. Thackery, you need to come with me right away.

(Brockhurst slurring) Where is he?!

Brockhurst: You think I'm messing?

Mr. Brockhurst.

I'm here for my girls.

That ship has sailed.

I suggest you put the g*n away and leave before I'm forced to call the police.

Call the police! You're the one who's guilty of a crime here.

This is theft. Those girls are my property.

Give them back the way they were before.

I can't do that. No, listen.

Listen to me. So many Siamese twins have asked me to perform this operation.

There are some sisters in my office right now.

They're Swedish. They're 12 years old.

Bullshit!

They're blonde. They're blue-eyed.

They're beautiful. They're... they're attached at the rib cage, so I can't separate them.

But a man like you can make a tidy profit.

Let me see them.

They're in my office. That way.

No funny business.

(nurse shrieks)

(laughs)

Good job.

Believe it or not, that's the first time I ever got to use that.

(laughs)

(strumming)

(knocks)

(claps lightly)

I wonder how you have the good fortune to acquire such substantial sums of money and so quickly.

Well, that's no concern of yours.

Perhaps it should be.

We can become partners and share in each other's good fortune.

I can assure you the money in that envelope is all that remains of any fortune of mine, good or bad.

You're not gonna count it?

After our long acquaintanceship?

The girl is yours.

Can I give you a receipt?

Oh, no. No, that won't be necessary.

Then may I give you a piece of advice?

Take to heart the words of the wise man who said, "Who, being loved, is poor?"

Confucius?

Oscar Wilde.

(both laugh)

Eleanor: I think we should sell this house.

There's simply not enough room.

Was that a thinly veiled hint that I should be returning home sooner rather than later?

Of course not, my darling.

You can stay as long as you like.

We love having Dorothy here, don't we, Everett?

Yes, I wonder if we need to impose on her any longer.

You've been doing so well lately, as demonstrated by recent events.

Oh, I'm sure it's no imposition.

And it does so brighten my day simply to look at her.

Then why do you want to sell the house?

Because there isn't enough room for all the children we'll have.

(Gallinger chuckles)

(knocking on door)

And it would be nice for them to have a backyard so they can play on the grass.

- Dr. Gallinger?

Yes?

Frank Moorhouse of the New York Detective's Bureau.

I'm sorry to bother you at this hour, but may I have a word?

Of course. Please come in.

My wife Eleanor. Her sister Miss Walcott.

May I present Detective Moorhouse.

I'll get straight to the point.

Ahem, I understand that you are acquainted with a Dr. Henry Cotton.

Yes.

I'm sorry to have to inform you the doctor is dead.

Poisoned.

What happened?

That's what we're trying to find out.

I've been retracing his movements in the days preceding his death, hoping to identify a likely suspect.

His appointment book says that he dined here the night before he d*ed.

Did he say anything that suggested he feared for his life?

No, I don't think so.

I'm sorry to interrupt, Everett.

May I offer you a hot cup of tea?

Well, that'd be very kind of you, Mrs. Gallinger.

Thank you.

Everett, could I trouble you to light the stove, please?

Would you excuse me a moment?

Please, won't you have a seat?

Yeah.

Biscuit?

No.

I'm sorry, Everett.

I didn't think they'd catch me up so soon.

Catch you up so soon at what, dear?

Well, I k*lled Dr. Cotton.

I put this in his soup.

Why?

Why?

You told me you credited him with how well you've become.

Why?

Oh, Everett.

Can't you see?

I'm not well at all.

Don't say anything.

Let me handle this.

Gallinger: Forgive me.

My wife and I were overcome by the news.

Dorothy: I was just telling the detective a little of your history with Dr. Cotton.

Gallinger: Remarkable man. What's more, I'm proud to say, a real bond of friendship developed between us during his treatment of my wife.

Milk and sugar?

Moorhouse: Milk, please.

This one's for you.

(speaking Polish)

Mr. Dominczyk, I'm afraid I've got some bad news.

The hospital's board has decided to close the ward.

There's only you left.

And frankly, I have no idea how to help you.

You were hophead?

Cocaine.

And heroin.

How did you stop?

A woman is helping me.

A friend.

We talk.

Maybe I'll talk to her.

How's the fit on this one?

Cleary: Not sure yet.

How can you not be sure?

It ain't like trying on a pair of boots. Takes a bit of... (grunts) concentration.

Blood flow is important, but so is a snug fit.

You sure know a lot about a fella's pecker for someone who's been avoiding them her whole life.

I'm just saying that if this is too uncomfortable, we can try it out on a stray dog instead.

Or maybe you could quit your gobbing.

Make yourself useful so I can maintain myself here.

Useful how?

I don't know.

Sing me a song.

A song?

Yeah.

Help put me in the proper mood.

But nothing about God or saints or f*cking baby Jesus.

I ain't singing nothing dirty.

Why, you know something like that?

No.

Oh.

What about...

"My Wild Irish Rose"?

♪ My wild Irish rose ♪
♪ The sweetest flower... ♪

Yeah, no.

No, that voice is just making the thing retreat...

(laughs) ...and look for cover.

Oh! Oh! That's working for me, though!

Do that again! (laughs)

August: On to new business.

Habershorn: The Search Committee has been tireless in its quest to identify a builder to finish construction on the new hospital without further delay or unanticipated expense.

After careful consideration, we are pleased to nominate for the job Mr. Raphael Warren of the firm Tate, Warren, and Bond.

His CV is in front of you, but I think you're already acquainted with his work, especially the lavish hotels he's built in midtown for Colonel Astor.

August: And he has the added benefit of being highly recommended by my son. So if there are no objections, I move we put this nomination to a vote. All in favor.

All: Aye.

Mr. Barrow.

Mr. Warren.

Right there, sir.

Thank you.

August: Mr. Warren, welcome to the Knick.

I just have one thing to say to you and I hope you'll take it to heart.

Your brief with us, in a word, is to economize.

Warren: In my experience, economizing is not always the best economy. But I've looked over your architect's blueprints and I believe you'll be pleased with my revised cost estimates.

Good. Then Barrow is your man.

Mr. Warren, may I say I look forward to a fruitful working relationship.

August: Well, that's settled, then.

If there's no further business, I move to adjourn.

All: Aye.

Thank you, gentlemen.

(clears throat)

Congratulations.

Thank you so much.

Very pleased to have you aboard.

Pleasure to be here.

August: Oh, Mr. Barrow, a word.

Welcome...

Thank you so much.

Now, my office is just downstairs.

Would you mind waiting in the lobby?

Of course.

Mr. Barrow...

Herman, you will be pleased to know that the club has voted to grant your membership.

Really?

(laughs)

You know, I had given up hope.

Well, you deserve it, if only in recognition of all your hard work here.

Now you're a man on the way up, Herman.

You make the most of it.

Oh, and make sure that the club secretary has your bank draft in the sum of $2,000 by the close of business today.

I thought the annual membership fee was $200.

Oh, it is.

But that's in addition to the 2,000 that each member is being asked to subscribe to the club's expansion.

We're building a ladies' wing.

Ah.

(laughs)

Money's not a problem, I hope.

No, consider it done.

Well, good day.

Dr. Thackery.

Thank you for coming.

This lady says that she knows you.

Really? I don't believe I've had the pleasure, Miss...

O'Connor.

You did this to me, remember?

Straightened my nose with part of an old gold earring.

Sorry, I have no recollection of this whatsoever.

At Cromartie.

I paid you in heroin.

Excuse me.

Everyone knew you were the famous Dr. Thackery.

You say I fixed it with a gold earring?

It belonged to my mother.

Well, I'm afraid your mother wasn't entirely truthful.

It isn't gold and it's corroding.

I suspect that's what's causing the swelling.

I'll get the admitting nurse to schedule the surgery and I'll replace it with something more permanent.

Like what?

Something else.

I have to warn you, I'm all out of heroin.

It's on the house.

Thank you.

(groans)

What's the matter with you?

(groans)

I've been getting these terrible stabbing pains.

Is it worse after a meal?

No, it's not an ulcer.

Well, let's go next door so I can perform a proper examination.

No, thank you.

At least allow me to look at your stool.

Not even if you went up there and got it yourself.

It's a fine house, Mr. Barrow.

I can think of any number of prospective buyers to show it to at your convenience, of course.

To be honest with you, Mr. Stern, I currently find myself in a bit of financial distress.

Consequently, I haven't time to show the house publically.

I don't understand. How do you intend to sell it?

Well, I was thinking that you might buy the house.

As an investment.

If you were willing to pay cash for it today, I am sure I can make it worth your while.

Have you a figure in mind?

How much is the house worth?

5,000.

It's yours for 3,500.

Can you clear out by the end of the week?

Of course.

The procedure's called septoplasty.

I place you under general sedation and then I'll insert this into your nasal cavities.

What is it made of?

It's celluloid.

It's the material they use to make motion film.

It's strong. It's malleable.

I'll use it to give support when I trim the excess flesh.

Thank you, John, for doing me this favor.

I know you had reservations about it.

I wanted to ask you one small favor.

Of course.

Would you consider talking to a patient of mine on the addiction ward?

I think you may be able to help him the way you helped me when I operated on the twins.

Oh.

Don't you think that the man would only be further upset by talking to someone who looks like me?

The important thing will be the effect your words have on him.

I mean, he doesn't have to see you at all.

A gentleman wishes to speak with you, ma'am.

Hello, this is Effie Barrow.

Man: Mrs. Barrow, I'm sorry to bother you, but your husband was otherwise engaged when I telephoned the hospital. Could you convey a message to him for me?

Who's speaking, please?

Please tell him the Kenney Vacuum Sweeping System has been installed as per his instructions.

Vacuum Sweeping System?

It's the newest thing. It allows you to vacuum carpets in any room in your house using a portable tube connected to a machine housed in the basement.

There's been no such installation here.

It's for the new house, Mrs. Barrow, the one on West 74th Street. Oh, dear me. I hope I didn't ruin the surprise. Be sure to tell him.

Henry: I can't decide if I'd rather see you in diamonds or sapphires.

Why not both?

Why not?

Which do you think would look better with your uniform?

I won't always be wearing my uniform.

Or anything else for that matter.

Neely, there you are.

What do you think?

Would Lucy look better in diamonds or sapphires?

With those blue eyes?

Sapphires, I'm sure.

Well, I could sit in the lap of luxury all day long, but I best get back to work.

It was nice talking to you both.

Oh, so why am I fetching you here?

I was delivering thank-you notes for the ball.

Well, hop in.

I'm famished.

All set?

Cornelia: I've been investigating the death of Inspector Speight of the Health Department.

Phillip's father found out and since he objects to me doing anything other than my matrimonial duties, he's had men following me whenever I leave the house.

I'm sure he means well.

Look, if it bothers you so much, why don't I have a word with him?

That's not it.

What is it, then?

Oh, Henry.

My investigation took a terrible turn and it's implicated Dad.

What do you mean?

He's violating maritime law, immigration statutes, and he's res...

(clears throat)

He's been issuing second-class tickets to passengers in steerage.

Why the devil would he do that?

Because the passengers are sick.

Second-class passengers disembark right into Manhattan and he's been bribing the port inspectors here to look the other way.

So Dad avoids millions of dollars in fines and return fares.

That's what Speight was investigating.

I can only assume Dad found out and had him k*lled.

But do you really think he has the stomach for m*rder?

The proof is in there.

He's responsible for the outbreaks of bubonic plague here and in San Francisco.

There were outbreaks in Hawaii, too.

Perfectly timed to the arrival of our ships from the West Coast.

I guess he... he got desperate.

And this is how he tried to... to right the ship.

I just... I can't believe it.

Dr. Gallinger.

How do you do, Dr. Warner?

May I present my wife Eleanor and her sister Miss Walcott.

Ladies, pardon us a moment while we discuss the arrangements.

I wanted you to see our day room.

I think your wife will find it quite soothing.

She was formerly a patient of Dr. Cotton's, no?

That's correct.

That's why I must insist that she undergo no medical procedures without explicit permission from me first.

Put your mind at ease.

I don't share the late Dr. Cotton's enthusiasm for surgical solutions to everything.

Her physical and psychological condition will be carefully assessed and a determination will be made as to the preferred mode of treatment.

Will she be happy?

If she's going to spend the rest of her days here, I want her to have as fulfilling a life as is possible under the circumstances.

We'll do our best to see that it's so.

I think this is a mistake.

This is how it has to be.

Eleanor: Please, don't leave me here.

Pell: Well, what do you think?

Lucy: I think you're making a mountain out of a molehill.

As I understand it, they'll need more nurses at the new Knick, not less.

Sure, more like you.

Meaning what?

Meaning they'll need fewer girls like me.

You have two eyes, Lucy.

Henry Robertson has made over the nursing staff into a beauty contest worthy of the new hospital's stylish decorations and fancy pneumatic elevators.

And I'll thank you very much, but a plain girl like me is nobody's idea of an ornament.

No.

Lucy, you have a telephone call.

This is Lucy Elkins.

Yes, A.D. Elkins is my father. Who is this?

You follow me, please.

I found a card in his billfold with your name and the Knickerbocker Hospital on it.

Reverend Elkins.

Here, turn him over.

Daddy?

(gasping)

Daddy? Daddy?

Lily was tanning his behind with a cat, like always.

All of a sudden, his eyes rolled back in his head.

Has he done this before?

Almost every day for the past couple of months.

(breathing rapidly) Daddy. Daddy.

He suffered a paralytic stroke.

Is there anything we can do?

Best I can do is keep him alive.

(whispers) Do you think he can hear us?

Well, his eyes seem to be following you, so it's possible.

I'd like to wait until morning to leave.

Of course. (laughs) Well, you must be pleased. With Eleanor's fate decided, you can continue on your search for a husband.

Don't let's be mean about it.

Isn't that what you told me?

It is.

But you know I didn't want it to end this way.

Although I do take some comfort from the thought she wasn't undone by some inherited weakness.

So it's unlikely I'll suffer the same fate.

I'm sure you won't.

Strong, smart, beautiful.

You Walcott girls come from superior stock.

That statement is true of the Gallinger men.

Naturally my heredity is identical to my sister's.

People often commented on it.

It's the eyes.

The fullness of your lips.

Cleary: Will you look at that, Pounce?

That horse has got a big tit on its back.

That's a camel, you idiot.

Comes from Arabia. Ask Harry, she knows.

It's called a dromedary.

A camel has two humps.

I'd like two humps. How about it, Myrtle?

Watch your mouth around the ladies.

Sorry, Sister.

I'm not a sister anymore, Mr. Pouncey.

Oh, did she die?

Who?

Your sister.

In a matter of speaking.

Oh, look. Here's the Chamber of Horrors I was telling you about.

Who's up for a spook?

Come on, let's go, Myrtle.

You coming?

I'll wait over here.

You're not on trial anymore, Harry.

There's nothing saying you can't have a little fun.

Just not feeling right about it.

You've no more debt to pay.

God set you free, didn't He?

At least His men did.

Besides, you didn't take a vow of misery.

There's no harm in a few smiles now and then.

In 10 years or so, chances are we'll be in the ground and I'd hate to think you spent the last of it slaving over a kitchen sink cleaning out sheep guts for other people's good times.

Let's go.

All right.

Atta girl. Come on.

(projector clicking)

Holy sh*t!

He just walked up and ate the whole camera.

I swear, ate the whole thing. Look.

How'd he do that?

Maybe it was a really small camera.

(shrieks) He just ate the cameraman, too.

This don't make no sense.

Let's watch it again.

All right, hold on.

Oh, no, that's my last one.

Now, we can either watch this again or we can go get some of those good-looking confections they were selling.

Candy sounds better.

Candy sounds better.

And there we go.

There we go.

Look at this here.

(laughs)

Thank you, Thomas.

You've been a real friend.

Oh, you ever think you'd call me that?

No.

Old Tom Cleary, the maggot ambulance man.

Boyo, the things you used to say to me.

Only because you were throwing plenty of jabs at me.

Ah, I know it wasn't right the way I treated you, but I still don't got no love for nuns.

You... well, you won over my heart.

Truly.

And I can say the same.

What are you doing?

I was kissing you!

- What do you think?

You're out of your mind.

What was all that talk just then?

Mutual respect is all.

Is this why you brought me out here?

To show me a good time hoping I'd give you something back for all that you've done?

Is that why you've done it all in the first place?

Was that your game?

Hey, this isn't a game.

I got feelings for you, Harry.

As much as just said so as did you about me.

I certainly didn't. You're what you always were.

I just turned a blind eye to it.

I'm going home.

And I'll thank you to stay well clear of me in that place.

(footsteps)

(doorknob rattling)

(papers rustling)

Jesus.

(groans)

(objects clatter)

So, Dr. Gallinger proceeded with his little eugenics project after all.

How many are there?

52.

All boys between the ages of 15 and 18.

I'm sure you'll agree with how serious this is.

Dr. Gallinger is clearly in breach of medical ethics.

These boys were operated on involuntarily.

Involuntarily?

Obviously.

They were too young to give their informed consent.

Does it say where the procedures took place?

No. No, I assume they took place at this so-called Idiot House.

Well, I definitely don't approve.

But it's not illegal and it didn't happen at the Knick.

So I don't know what I can do about it.

Mrs. Alford, may I introduce Mr. Dominczyk.

How do you do?

How do you do?

I don't understand why I cannot look at your girl.

If I had a girl, I would let you look at her.

As I explained to you, the important things are her words and the sound of her voice.

Looking at a beautiful woman would simply distract you and lessen the effect.

Mr. Dominczyk...

I'm unsure how to begin.

Why don't you tell me a little about yourself?

I am a steamfitter.

I'm also a drunk.

Yes, well...

Do you... do you drink often?

Every chance I get.

That's what makes me a drunk.

You're right, she has a lovely voice.

(sighs softly)

Do you remember the first time you took a drink?

No.

It was when I was a baby.

Your parents were the first to give you spirits?

My mother would give me whiskey.

She would dip a rag in it and give it to me to suck.

Why on earth would she do such a thing?

Had to keep me quiet.

Champagne?

What's the occasion?

First a toast.

To surprises.

All right, then.

To surprises.

What are we supposed to do now?

Smash our glasses in the fireplace like Russians?

(laughing)

Effie.

I'm waiting.

Waiting for what?

My surprise.

What surprise?

Oh, Herman, you never were one for the grand gesture.

I hate to ruin it for you, but it's not my fault.

Your man telephoned for you here.

What man?

He didn't tell me his name, but he told me all about the new house and the remarkably modern vacuum system. 74th Street. (laughs) How stylish.

I see.

Well, Herman, who is he?

He's an architect.

Formerly in my employ.

When were you planning on telling me?

I suppose now is as good a time as any.

Maybe we can drive round and see it after dinner.

No. No, Effie.

You need never see the house.

What are you talking about? Why on earth not?

Because... (clears throat) I intend to live in it with another woman.

I've also taken the liberty of selling this house.

You may stay through the end of the week, but then you and the children must go.

I've rented you an apartment downtown.

Two bedrooms in a walk-up.

Was that a grand enough gesture for you?

For Christ's sake.

(music playing)

(liquid pouring)

(footsteps approaching)

(knocks on door)

Mrs. Alford, it's time.

Ready?

To look like me again.

Bertie.

(clock ticking)

(hissing)

Doctor, I have no pulse.

Dilated. She's having a reaction.

Drop the table.

(metal pan clangs)

Three, two, one.

Bertie, brandy and strychnine.

Lucy: Still no pulse.

Lucy, pump her arms.

Take over.

Anything?

No, nothing.

What are you doing? What are you doing?

Limiting circulation.

Reducing pressure on her heart.

(clock ticking)

Take the tube out of her mouth.

(knocks on door)

Yes?

Do you still want me to leave tomorrow?

No.

(music playing)

(Light instrumental music)