03x01 - t*rrorists and Gingerbread

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Mom". Aired: September 2013 to present.*
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"Mom" follows the life of a single mother who, after dealing with her battle with alcoholism and drug abuse, decides to restart her life in Napa Valley, California, working as a waitress and attending Alcoholics Anonymous meetings.
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03x01 - t*rrorists and Gingerbread

Post by bunniefuu »

Whoo!

Whoa.

All right.

Stretch it out.

How was your run?

I think it might have been my personal best.

Two miles in...

46 minutes.

You're really committed to this.

Good for you.

Yeah, well, you know how they talk about that runner's high?

Well, it's real.

It's not great, but it's real.

Nice.

So, listen, I got a call...

Uh-huh.

About you.

Okay.

You do know we're having a drought.

Yeah, I've chosen not to participate.

So you got a call?

Right.

It was a very surprising call.

Why are you dragging this out?

Because you're in a good mood and I'm gonna miss that.

Who called?

It was a private investigator hired to track you down.

All right, pack your bags. We knew this day would come.

No. No, no, no.

He was hired by...

Your mother.

What?

She wants to meet you.

Huh.

You okay?

Is that a good "huh"?

A bad "huh"?

A sh**t the messenger "huh"?

How'd this guy find me?

Um, well, your recent DUI seems to be the gift that keeps on giving.

Anyway, your mom lives in San Francisco, but she'd be willing to drive here if you want to meet her.

Nice to know she gave up her kid but kept the car.

Okay, here's what I want you to do.

I want you to call this detective and tell him he's got the wrong Bonnie Plunkett.

My mother d*ed stopping t*rrorists from blowing up Disneyland.

What?

That's what I decided when I was nine, and I'm sticking with it.

Okay, I'll call him.

Wait! Stop.

Didn't move.

What is going on here?

Why am I getting so upset about this?

This is just a woman I share DNA with.

I don't know, maybe I should meet her.

Who knows?

Maybe I'll need a kidney or bone marrow someday.

Liver, more likely.

(Scoffs)

For God's sakes, it's a historic drought!

Nope, not gonna do it.

If I need an organ, I'll get it from you.

(Sighs)

My liver might not be an upgrade.

That woman gave me up when I was four years old.

You know what happens to four-year-olds who get tossed into the system?

They don't get adopted, especially when they're five feet tall!

Okay, we're walking again.

Hey, how 'bout we go to a meeting?

You go to a meeting. I'm going for a run.

You just did that.

Remember how I used to do blow?

Now I run like that.

So you're not the least bit curious to meet her?

She's not my mother.

This woman is more my mother.

She's fed me more times.

Be nice if you said "please" and "thank you" once in a while.

In her defense, she did give you life.

I disagree.

How do you disagree with that?

I would've gotten here some other way.

Don't you wonder what she wants?

Who cares what she wants?

First she wanted a little girl, then she didn't want a little girl.

Now she wants a little girl again?

Well, I'm not gonna be her little girl. Not gonna happen.

(Whispering): She thinks she's a little girl?

Bonnie, I know you don't want to hear this, but seeing her again might be good for you.

It might be healing.

Oh, please. Who am I if I heal?

I want to meet her.

You're kidding, right?

She's my grandmother.

I'd like to know where I come from.

I can't believe you're not on my side with this.

I'm not taking sides.

We have no relatives.

Roscoe had to make a family tree for school last year.

It had one leaf.

Wouldn't it have four leaves since he has a sibling and...

Trying to make a point, Wendy.

Do what you want.

You're welcome.

Hi.

I'm Christy Plunkett.

Hello, Christy.

It is so nice to meet you.

Well, it's nice to meet you, too.

You are so pretty.

Thank you.

You smell like gingerbread.

That's always how I imagined you'd smell.

You imagined smelling me?

Mostly at Christmas.

I think we have the same nose. (Chuckles)

Okay, now, this is getting weird.

Wait, aren't you Shirley Stabler?

No, that's me.

(Sighs)

I'm sorry.

I thought you were my grandmother.

Well, we're even.

I thought you were nuts.

Hi.

Hi.

Nice to meet you.

It's nice to meet you, too.

Ah. You smell like cigarettes.

Yep, you're my grandmother.

Look at you.

You look...

Nothing like I pictured.

That lady thought I was pretty.

Oh, you are.

You're beautiful.

No way that's your natural hair color.

But it looks good on you.

I'm sorry your daughter couldn't be here.

Oh, that's okay.

I figured it was a 50/50 sh*t.

It's cute you thought it was that close.

I'm guessing she hates me.

Yeah, but...

She hates so many people.

She hates Elton John.

I mean, who hates Elton John?

The guy's a hit machine.

Oh, so you're a babbler, huh?

Only when I'm uncomfortable.

Not that I'm uncomfortable now. I mean...

Yeah. Yeah, I am a babbler.

Well, I'm glad you came.

You look like you turned out fine.

Actually, the first 33 years were kind of touch and go.

I was an alcoholic and a stripper, and a bit of a drug addict.

Woman: Oh, Christy.

I-I turned it around.

Hey, go find your own granddaughter.

Now I have a great job, I've gone back to school, I have two terrific kids.

You got any pictures?

Um...

Okay.

This is Roscoe.

Aw.

He's ten.

This was a rash I was concerned about, but it's cleared up.

This is Violet.

Oh, she's a beauty.

And...

There's your daughter.

Those eyes.

The same beautiful eyes.

Did she finally grow into those big feet of hers?

Almost.

So...

What happened with the whole thing with you?

Oh. Right to the chase, huh?

It's okay, you don't have to.

No. No, no, no.

That's why we're here.

Um...

Well... right after I turned 20, Bonnie's father got k*lled in a motorcycle accident.

And I didn't have no family to help me out, so I had to get work, mostly cleaning houses.

Um, I couldn't afford a babysitter, so I got fired a lot for bringing Bonnie with me.

(Sighs)

It was bad.

There were some days when I could barely afford to feed her.

I once gambled away our rent money and ended up with my kids in a motel.

You trying to top my story?

No, no.

I'm-I'm sorry. Go on.

Well, anyway, the day that I moved us into my car, I figured the only sh*t she had at a decent life was if I put her in foster care.

So... That's what I did.

That's heartbreaking.

I'm glad she could be a better mother to you than I was to her.

Let's just say it's a horse race.

Not as simple as you think.

She had no money, she couldn't feed you.

Giving you up broke her heart.

Nice story.
I'm sticking with the Disneyland t*rrorists.

You need to see her.

It might be your last chance.

What are you talking about?

The reason she reached out to you is...

She's dying.

How long does she have?

Couple months.

I'm going for a run.

Really?

Is that the new thing with you?

Every time you can't deal with your feelings, you go jogging?

(Sighs) You're right.

Why don't you make some tea?

We'll sit down and talk about it.

Thank you.

Now you're acting like an adult.

(Door slams)

I'm still making tea.

Five minutes, and then we're out of here.

I'm really proud of you.

Hey, if I were dying, I know you'd want to see me.

Wouldn't miss it for the world.

Hello, Christy.

Christy: Hi.

Well, well, well.

Mom.

Finally decided to crawl out from under your rock, huh?

Mom, mom, mom.

No, you brought me here... I'm doing this.

You're a real piece of work, wanting my forgiveness.

Mom, please...

I don't know what you're dying of, but I hope it's slow and painful.

She's not your mother.

You have a super day.

Christy.

Oh, good.

(Clears throat)

This is your mother.

Hello, Bonnie.

Probably be more comfortable if we sat down.

I'll go first.

Okay. (Chuckles)

Well, I was wrong about it being more comfortable.

Thank you so much for being willing to see me.

I'm only here 'cause you're about to die.

What do you got anyway?

Uh, it's my heart.

Something hereditary we need to worry about?

No, just years of hard living finally caught up with me.

Maybe we should worry a little.

Honey, I-I...

I knew what I was gonna say to you when I saw you, but now I-I don't know where to start.

Just tell her what you told me.

Bonnie, giving you up was the hardest thing and the worst mistake I ever made in my whole life.

But I want you to know that I thought of you every single day.

Yeah, terrific. Why didn't you come back?

You said you were gonna come back.

Well, I wanted to. I tried.

You left me bouncing around foster homes.

I was trying to make money, trying to get on my feet.

Yeah, so?

It got complicated.

What the hell does that mean?

Oh, God.

I was a cocktail waitress in Tahoe.

And I met this guy...

And I moved in with him.

And?

And...

Tell me.

He said he didn't want any kids around.

I'm sorry.

I-I didn't know this part.

So you picked your happiness over mine.

I was young, I was scared.

What can I say? I screwed up.

No, I screwed up with her.

What you did to me is unforgivable.

I know.

On the bright side, she's dying.

You were gone a long time.

I decided to run until I wasn't mad anymore.

I went, like, 18 miles, puked and had to take the bus back.

Listen, Marjorie really wanted to talk to you, so...

Stop. I already know what she's gonna say.

I don't need to hear it come out of her shrunken little apple head.

Hello, Bonnie.

Do you not know how to give a heads up?

Sit down and listen to the apple head.

Let me guess... you want me to forgive my mother and invite her back into my life.

No, I just...

That woman threw me away, and I've spent every day since then thinking I was unlovable.

And sometimes you are.

That being said, there might be an alternative to hating your mother for the rest of your life.

You got my attention.

Hi.

Hi.

Come on in.

Thanks for seeing me.

Oh, I was so happy when you called.

You want some coffee?

Sure.

Black okay?

That's fine.

(Sighs softly)

So how long have you lived here?

About 20 years.

It's nice.

No, it ain't.

No, it ain't.

I guess you got a lot of questions for me, huh?

Well, yeah.

I don't know anything about my father.

I don't even know his name.

It was Henry.

Uh, just a terrific guy.

Had a great sense of humor.

He was handsome, tall. couldn't ride a motorcycle to save his life.

Literally.

So he wasn't Paul Newman.

And another fantasy dies.

I thought you might like to have a picture of him.

Is that... me he's holding?

Yeah.

Oh.

What, was I about two years old here?

No, about six months.

So what was your deal?

dr*gs? Booze?

Sorry?

Well, I just assumed if we're related, it must be one or the other or both.

Oh, no.

Well, I smoked a little pot, but it just always made me paranoid.

And I never developed a taste for alcohol.

It has a taste?

Uh, Christy told me that you had a problem.

But you seem to be dealing with it.

I'm doing great.

Yes, you are.

Anyway...

I came here to, uh, tell you that, um, I forgive you.

Mm, thank you.

No, don't thank me.

I'm not doing it for you.

I'm doing it for me.

What do you mean?

Shirley, a good friend of mine told me if I could forgive you, I could fi... finally be free of all the anger in my heart.

And I really... need to be free of it.

Because if I'm not, I'm, uh...

I'm gonna drink again.

Or jog myself to death.

That's good.

Then we... we can start over.

No, I don't think so.

I-I... just because I forgive you doesn't mean I want you in my life.

That's something my friend told me, too.

Who's this friend?

Well, to be honest, she's not so much a friend as the... mother I never had.

But I'll be damned if I'll tell her that.

Okay, uh, I got to go.

Already?

Am I... am I gonna see you again?

I don't know.

Maybe.

I need some time.

Can I at least give you a hug?

I'm sorry, I don't think so.

Not... not yet.

Thank you for the picture.

(Shirley sobbing quietly)

Did you have a nice time at your dad's?

Yeah, it was great.

So, listen.

I'm a little confused.

How long have you known about her?

Well, we met her a couple days ago.

So what do I call her?

Great-grandma?

I think she'd really like that.

I made cookies.

Bonnie: Who says you can't pick your family?
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