02x07 - The Most Disappointed Man

Previously on This Is Us...

I haven't had a happy life.

Some would call it sad,but I don't.

Why did you choose to get drunk?

You embarrassed me in front of my friends.

Deja, your mom might not be coming back for a while.

What do you mean? Yes, she will.

I'm pregnant.

♪ ♪

♪ If you want to ride a rainbow ♪

♪ Come with me, and I will take you to the magic purple sea ♪

♪ And maybe we will find a thousand sugar fish ♪

♪ When you eat them they will grant your every wish ♪

♪ And if you want your friends to come... ♪


- Hi.

- Hi.

- Nice to meet you.

- Hey. Come on in.

- How are you?

- Thank you. Very good.

Okay. Right here is where the babies sleep.

We got Randall right here, next to Kevin and Kate.

REBECCA: And we are absolutely getting a changing table in case you're wondering, which obviously, you are, coming to check on prospective adoptive parents.

- I'm gonna stop talking.

- Yeah. We're really excited.


- So excited.

♪ Maybe we will find a rainbow to teach it to fly... ♪

- Hi.

- Hey, Paula.

Evening, Jack. Just wanted to stop in for a quick little checkup on Randall.

Come on in.

Kevin just about bit my freaking nipple off.

JACK: Hey, look, it's Paula.

- Hi, Paula.

- Hi.

- REBECCA: Come on in.

- How's he doing? Hi.

Oh, he's good. He's great.

Hi, Paula.

- How are you?

- Good.

♪ I will take you where the elves and... ♪

This is leftover from yesterday.

Now, we don't usually give Randall too much sugar.

I just figured, for a first birthday...

Rebecca, your kids can have birthday cake.

I won't hold it against you.

- Okay, thanks.

- So, the judge,

he has all this paperwork?

Yes, along with my glowing recommendation.

Now, this next part is just a formality.

You'll go before Judge Bradley, and he'll ask you a few questions, like, "Do you wish to adopt this child?"

- And you'll say, "Yes, we do."


- We need to commemorate this moment.

- No, babe,

- I-I don't think we need anymore...

- We need pictures.

- We need new pictures.

- We're gonna get new pictures.

- Okay. That's good.


♪ Let your eyelids close on down ♪

♪ Where we're going you won't need to bring your frown ♪

- ♪ You will find that... ♪

- Hang on.

I'm having a little trouble balancing your skin tones.

So, what are these for? First birthday?

No, they're for our adoption notice for our son, Randall.

Bet you can't guess which one Randall is.



We don't get a lot of families that look like yours in here.

Either you're blown out, or Randall's a dark blob.

- Shh.

- You know what? Just do your best.

- It happens a lot.

- Yeah.

We got about seconds...

Before one of them craps, barfs, or all three just lose their minds.

- Yep.

All right, big smiles on three.

One, two, three.



- OFFICER: Face right.

JUDGE CROWDER: The court accepts your guilty plea, Mr. Hill.

And since you are unable to post bail, you'll be remanded until your sentencing hearing.

Do you understand?

You have no record.

Not so much as a traffic violation.

So, I must admit, I find this arrest rather disappointing.

What would you have me do, Your Honor?

On every corner, there's someone selling, so I buy... and I use.

If you had my life, you'd probably use, too.

Just a year ago, my mother was alive, and my girl was alive, and we were having a son.

Now, they're gone.

- They're all gone.

- Mr. Hill...

So, I come here, and you tell meyou're disappointed?

Well, guess what?

I am more disappointed.

I am the most disappointed man you've ever met in your whole damn life.

So, if you want to lock me up, lock me up.

Put me inside, because there is nothing out here for me anymore.

♪ ♪


No, we'll see you at : .

- Who was that?

- Uh, Linda.

Deja and me are meeting her at the clink this morning.

"The clink"? Baby, why you sound like a character from The Wire?

Because it's not fair, Beth.

I mean, Deja's years old, and I got to take her to visit a woman who thinks it's perfectly fine to drive her daughter around with an unlicensed gun in the glove compartment.

I know you're not looking forward to this, babe, but it's court-ordered.

The woman's a criminal.

Who's also her mother.


You know what? I'm-a come with y'all.

I'm gonna just push my : and make sure...

No, nope. I-I got this. You go to work.

Somebody's got to pay for my cold brew habit.

These beans don't grow on trees.

You know, actually, they do.

I mean, technically, it's not a tree, but...

- I got it.

- Okay.

Morning, Destiny's Children.

- Good morning!

- Morning!


You look very pretty.

- Nice dress.

- Thanks.

Um... It's my mom's favorite.

Car bagel?

Let's go.

See you, guys.

- Bye, baby.

- Bye, babe.

Who's driving? You or me?



KEVIN: Baby, what's up?

Hey, are you all packed for your flight?

I stocked up on all your favorites.

Even that weird tea that I can't say.

It's... ma-macha...

- Mach-ta?

- Matcha.

Right. Um, also, I'm-I'm trying to change my shift, so I can pick you up from the airport.


Yeah, uh... L-Listen, we might have to push that... till next week, because there's this, uh, there's this director out here that my agent really wants me to meet.

Kevin, this is the third time you've pushed.

- I know. You're right.

- Just be honest.

Do you even want to move out here?

What? Do I want to... of course I want to move out there.

What are you talking about?

Because it feels like you're stalling, and it's getting ridiculous.

- Soph, listen...

- Kev, you came to me.

You showed up at my door.

I was doing just fine, and you showed up, and you said all that stuff, and, you know...


Crap, I have to go. Listen, just...

Let's just talk about it later.

- Okay?

- Okay.

All right.

Hey, Soph, uh...

I just want to tell you that I love you.



(SIGHING): Oh, Soph.


How long is he gonna take?

- I don't... Yep... yep.


- What's up, Mount Keverest?

- Kev!

All right, make it quick, all right?

Because I got to go home and pack.

I'm flying to New York tonight to promise Sophie that I would fix things with her, so...

Okay, you're gonna want to sit for this.

Follow me.


So, this is it?

This is the big surprise?

You guys have just, you know, given up, fashion-wise?




- A-three.

- A-three.


We're pregnant.

You're preg...

- KATE: W-We're pregnant.

- Oh, my God!

This is amazing! What am I doing over there?

- Ten weeks.

- This is great.

- I-I'm shocked.

- Oh, yeah!

All right, this is fantastic.

KATE: I mean, is he gonna be the best dad ever?

- I don't know.

- Uh, yeah.

KATE: Giving the best fatherly advice.

Can you see him?


- Yeah, I can.

- Act... I really, I can.

- TOBY: I don't know.

Uh, no, I think so. And you're gonna read bedtime stories.



- Shh... Hey. Hey, sweetie.

- Shh, shh, shh..


- We're here, we're here.

- JACK: That's us.

Shh, shh, it's okay.


- Sorry, there's a few of us.

- Hello.

I have read your report, and I have some questions about your home visits.

Uh, I'd like to speak with your social worker, "Paula Miller"?

She's not here, sir.

Uh, she told us that everything you would need could be found in our file.


Well, as I said, I have some questions.

Uh, so, right now, we're about three weeks out.

My clerk with put you back on the docket. Thank you.

- The Andersons?

- Come on.

- (QUIETLY): All right.

- Okay.

Um, maybe we can, uh, s-sit over...

- Hold on.

- W-What are you doing?

It's... My bad.

Parental instinct.

I've seen people in handcuffs before.

I'm not scared.

No, of course.

I've seen people

in handcuffs, too, so...

Oh, really? In real life, or on TV?

Come on, man. Real life.


Oh, hey, guys.

- Hi.

- Hi, Miss Linda.

So, Deja, you're gonna be in a special visiting area today.

No glass divides or telephones.

You're gonna be able to hug your mom.


- Cool.

- Shall we?


♪ ♪


Jack, I don't understand.

Paula raved about us in our file.

What does the judge want to talk to her about?

Let's go find out.


No. Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack.

Excuse me, Judge Bradley. Hi.

Jack Pearson. My-my wife Rebecca.

I remember.

And you're not supposed to approach me outside the courtroom.

- Yeah, but... I'm sorry. I know.

We're very sorry, sir, but, um, is there any way that we could talk to you for just one minute?


Come in my chambers.


Your curls are killing it.

What do they call that, a big chop?


Your mom's gonna love it.

Hey, I'll be right back.

What's up? We've been waiting for a while.

Shauna's not coming.

What do you mean, Shauna's not coming?

She opted out of seeing Deja.

It happens sometimes.

I don't understand.

You said this was a mandatory visit.

She has the right to opt out.

I'm sorry, what about...

- what about Deja's rights?

- I...

We've been looking forward to this for weeks.

- I know. I'm sorry.

- That's great.

I'll let Deja know you're sorry.

I'm sure that'll help.

- Excuse me?

- Sometimes I can't help but wonder if anyone's actually looking out for these kids.

You wonder if...

Randall, last month we got a girl who had an ear infection when she was an infant.

- Just a minor little ear infection.

- Mm-hmm.

Totally treatable... except her birth parents didn't treat it.

They ignored it for six months, and now she's four and she's deaf.

Do you know how hard it is to find someone who'll take in a deaf four-year-old?

Do you know how many times I have held up a photograph of her and shown prospective foster parents, and I've watched their faces light up?

And then I watched those smiles disappear when I tell them she's deaf.

Do you know how to say, "Sorry, sweetie, we still haven't found a family for you," in sign language?

Because I do.

So, please... don't tell me you wonder if anyone's out there looking out for these kids.

I'm sorry, Linda.

Did Shauna say why she didn't want to see her?


♪ ♪

Apparently, there was a mix-up, and, um... our visit wasn't cleared with the folks here.

So she's not coming?

I'm so sorry, Deja.

I know how much you were looking forward to seeing your mom.

Um... could I go get my purse?

Yeah, we can get it on the way back.

No, I need it now.


I've been saving up my allowance for my mom, so that she can get everything she needs in here.


We'll go get your purse, then figure out who to give the money to.

♪ ♪

- Congratulations.

- I'm glad you came over.

- Thank you for coming, you guys.

- Hey.

- I'm so... happy for you.

- Thanks, man. Oh. Yeah. Okay.

All right.

- All right, love you guys.

- KATE: Love you.

All right. All right.

That went great.

Did he seem off to you?

Uh, yeah, I guess he seemed a little...

- a little distracted.

- Yeah.

Okay, so, we told Kev.

Now on to your mom.

No, uh, wait.

Yeah, see, still... it's a little early.

And so we should, uh, we should just give her a couple of hours to get through her "Judge Block."

- I'm sorry, the... the what?

- Uh, Judge Judy,Judge Mathis, Divorce Court.

Uh, she can't be... kind of disturbed during that.

So... we'll just call her after.

That's fine.

- Tobe?

- Mm-hmm?

Are you scared to tell your mom that her Catholic son is having a baby out of wedlock?

- Am I scared?

- Mm-hmm.

- No. I am terrified.

Do you remember how she reacted when we told her that we were moving in together?

- Yeah. A lot of tears.

But she... you know, she got over it.

Yes, she did.

But bun in the unmarried oven is like a whole new level of freak out.

- Yeah. Okay, it's ringing.


- Mm-mm. Mm-mm. Are we doing this?

- Yeah. Yeah. Yes.

Okay, well, she's not gonna answer, 'cause Judge Judy is on.

- She might.

- I'm not gonna leave a message.

- (SIGHS) I should?

- I don't know.

Her voice mail picked up.

Am I leaving a message?

I shouldn't leave this on-on her answering machine, should I?

Kate, am I leaving a message right now?

Okay, okay. Wow.


- Ooh.

- Sorry.

Let's get married.

Yeah, we're going to.

No. Let's just go to the courthouse and get married.


Why not?

Nothing about our relationship has been traditional.

I proposed to you when I thought you were unconscious.

You know, we decided to have a nice, long engagement, to slow things down, and then boom!

You knocked me up, so...

Are you for real?

Let's get married.

JACK: Your Honor...

Randall has been with us for over a year...

Look, let me save you some time by being direct.

I don't believe that child belongs in your home.

- What?

- Excuse me?

That child belongs with a black family.

Mr. and Mrs. Pearson, how else... will he see himself, understand who he is?


'Cause we will... teach him all of that.

JACK: Yeah.

- You will teach him?

- REBECCA: Yeah.

Mrs. Pearson, I was nine years old before I understood that I was black.

Now, I understood my skin color, the color of my friends and my parents, but I never really understood what my blackness meant until a white man called me a nigger.

And my father sat me down, and he explained to me what that word meant.

He didn't... sympathize or feel sorry for me, because he understood all the pain that that word elicits.

My father had been called that word more times in his life than he could count.

Now, you see, what you have in your possession is a black child who will grow up to become a black man, and my fear... is that he won't have the tools he needs in his life if he stays in your home.

I'm... I'm sorry, sir.

With all due respect... to your opinion, our son was left in a box outside of a fire station...

And there are places, and there are people who will care for him until he can be paired with a suitable family.

Now, that's my opinion.

It will not change.

Now, I said that this is... inappropriate.

I will see you at your next court date.

If you're going for a more vintage vibe, rose gold is very "right now."

- Okay. Well, you know, I got to be on a red-eye in about an hour here, Roger.

So just, you know, show me whatever's the most sparkly.

- Got it.

- Okay.

Do I know you from somewhere?

I'm a famous person, Roger.

Yeah, just, you know, show me the diamonds.

Let's see the goods.

Ooh, that's good.

This is... this is like something my dad would do after he messed up with my mom.

He would... do something big like this, something romantic. You know?

Well, proposing is definitely romantic.


Uh, all our selections are conflict-free.

Well, uh, Sophie will love that.

That's good news. She hates conflict.

You know. Hates it.

I haven't exactly been the best boyfriend lately, but I think...

we're gonna be fine.

- I'm sure you will.

- Yeah.

I really love her.

I'm sure you do.

You know what? We're gonna do all three.

Okay? I'll just get these three; we'll let her decide.

I'll just wrap this up.

CLERK: So, after I issue you the marriage license, you come back here tomorrow for the ceremony, bring a witness, and whoosh, you're married.

"Whoosh"? What is that, the sound a marriage makes?

It is here.

TOBY: I never imagined getting married under so many fluorescent lights.

Yeah, but think of all the money that we're gonna be saving.

And all the other wedding crap that we get out of.

- Totally.

I don't have to go wedding dress shopping.

- Hell no, you don't.

- Right? Listen to them break it to me that none of the pretty ones come in my size.


Oh, and I don't have to listen to those random wedding guests come up to me every five minutes and say, "Oh, your father would have loved the day." (SCOFFS)

Oh, and then, "Who's gonna walk you down the aisle?"

And father-daughter dance.

Like, whatever.

This is way better.

Just get it over with.

- Yeah.

- CLERK: You guys are all set.

See you back here tomorrow.

- Okay.

- Uh, thanks.

- Thank you.

- Congrats.


♪ ♪

So this should be pretty quick.

We'll just be in and out in...

Your Honor, what is this meeting?

I didn't know we'd be having any kind...

I wanted a word with Mr. Hill, before his sentencing, in private.

Sir, I can't advise my client to waive his rights to speak to you or...

It's okay.

I'll be right outside.

I gave a young man ten years today.

Younger than you.

He stole a TV.

Ten years for stealing a TV.

It wasn't even a good TV.

I didn't want to do it, just like I didn't want to give five years to a different fella yesterday, years to another guy the day before that.

I'm a judge, and the strange thing is... I don't make the rules.

So, round and round it goes.

I know the ending to each one of those stories.

And they haven't even been written yet.

I'm here, Mr. Hill, because you said something yesterday, and it stuck with me.

You said you were the most disappointed man in the world.

And I'm here to tell you, I fear I am a close second, Mr. Hill.

Because I'm the man who writes terrible stories day after day, and I can't change the endings.

And that, sir, is a horrible... disappointment.

So, I want to see if we can find you a different ending here.

I'm gonna take a chance on you, get you out, get you help.

I don't expect you to be perfect.

I know you'll make mistakes, just like the rest of us.

But I will ask one thing of you.

(QUIETLY): Yes, sir.

I want you to look at my face.

I want you to look at this too tired, too old, too fat face.

Lock it in your brain.

And if you ever start heading toward the ending I don't want to write, I want you to picture this ugly old mug.

You picture this face, and you make a different choice.

Can you do that?

Can you find me a different ending to your story?


How is she? She say anything?

Not really.

She just wanted to go to sleep.

You should've seen her today, Beth, with that little purse.

I mean, when she handed over her allowance...

- This mother's a real piece of work.

- Right?

I mean, first she abandons her daughter. Right?

Then she lets her get tossed from group home to group home.

She's been abused, neglected, and who knows what else.

And then she doesn't even bother to show up for the visit?

- Uh-uh. Uh-uh.

- Uh-uh. Uh-uh.

We're not letting her go back over there.

Well, hold on, now.

These are court-ordered visits.

I don't give a damn about a court order, Randall.

I am done letting that woman hurt that child.

Okay, wait.

I thought I was gonna be the one bringing the heat here, and you were gonna calm me down, so we switching places?

Yeah, we switching, okay?

Because it's our job to protect that little girl, so we gonna do our job. So that means, as long as she's under this roof, she's not gonna have anything to do with that woman.

- You could've moved in with Natalie.

- WOMAN: No.

- JUDGE JUDY: In any event...

- TOBY: Mm-mm.

Nope. Not gonna do it.

I am not having a conversation about this with you, sir.

It's not happening.

It is weird enough that you live on the mantel.

Yeah, it would've been nice to get your permission or-or get your blessing, the right way.

FYI, I would have crushed proposing to your daughter, by the way.

I'm the king of romantic gestures.

I hear that we have that in common.

That and our insane good looks.

Okay, but here's...

See, here's the thing.

Kate loves weddings.

All right? She watches Say Yes to the Dress with her special Say Yes to the Dress notebook, like she's studying.

Yeah, my BS meter is going off, too, with this whole courthouse thing.

I do not think that this is what she wants to do.


Anyhow, Kate says that you are great in the advice department.

So I could really use some of that right now.

♪ It's not the long, flowing dress that you're in ♪

♪ Or the light coming off of your skin ♪

♪ The fragile heart... ♪

Hi. How's my second favorite nurse at Manhattan General doing?

Kevin Pearson, what are you doing here?

What do you mean, what am I doing here?

I'm here to, uh, you know, I'm surprising Sophie.

She around, or...?

No, she just left on the transport to Queens.

- She'll be back soon.

- Yeah?

- So you can hang out.

- All right.

I'll hang out. Thank you.

♪ It's not the way you talk me off the roof ♪

♪ Your questions like directions to the truth ♪

♪ It's knowing that this can't go on forever ♪

♪ Likely one of us will have to spend some days alone ♪

♪ Maybe we'll get years together ♪

♪ But one day I'll be gone ♪

♪ Or one day you'll be gone ♪

♪ If we were vampires ♪

- ♪ And death was a joke... ♪


- Didn't you hear him?


- What were you doing?


Give him some fatherly advice, Kevin.

I don't have any.

- Hey, Dad, play with me.

- Later.

♪ ♪




I'm Randall Pearson.

Thank you for seeing me.


I'm Deja's foster father.

I needed to explain...

I didn't want her to see my face like this.

I wanted to explain to you that what happened yesterday was very difficult for Deja.

She was disappointed.

She was really looking forward to seeing you.

When you make a commitment to a child, you got to stick to it.

Well, next time I'll reschedule getting jumped.

Well, obviously, I'm not familiar with...

No, no, please, continue.

You seem to know all about my situation.

Deja's doing well.

She gets along with my wife and my daughters.

They're close to her age.

We're thinking of enrolling her in Woodside Middle School.

Last foster parents let her stay at her old school.

She's got friends there.

She's on drill team.

Woodside's an excellent school.

I'm sure the cheerleading squad there is pretty great.

(CHUCKLES) You got a white wife?

Excuse me?

Cheerleading is not drill team.

I know the difference. Thank you.

And don't get it twisted, sis, I wake up every morning next to a head scarf and coconut oil.

I'm married to a black queen, not that it's any of your business.

You know what? You made the choices that got you in here, but your daughter is a child, and I don't think you know the half of what she's been through because of you.

So you don't need to be worried about me or my wife.

You need to be focused on what's best for Deja.

Oh, let me guess. That's you?

I'm on this side of the glass, aren't I?


You know, that's not the first time I've heard that.

"I'm on the other side of the glass."

My ex Lonzo said that same exact thing sitting right there where you are right now.

- Is he...?

- No. He's not Deja's father.

He took off when Deja was eight.

Mm-mm, Lonzo is the fool who got me in this mess.

Met him in rehab when I was trying to get right.

Ain't that something?

Trying to get right, and I get Lonzo.

That's unfortunate.

I wound up on this side of the glass, yeah.

And you wound up over there, no doubt 'cause things broke your way.

Don't you dare say I'm in here by choice.

People who have choices say that mess.

Deja's the one good thing I've done.

And I thank you for watching out for her, but make no mistake, all right, you can give her your money, and you can give her your cheerleading, but I gave her my blood.

And if you want to know what's best for her, it's me.

And the second I get out of here, I'm coming back for her.

You gonna have to go through me.

I've been through worse.

♪ ♪

(SIGHS): Oh, thank God. Okay.


- Babe, you okay?

- Yeah.

- You look like you're gonna faint.

Listen, I, uh, I called my mom and I told her about the baby.

Uh, she cried a little bit, then she hung up so she could call her priest.


Yes. Okay, and now... (EXHALES)


They didn't have your, uh, your version on iTunes, so I-I had to use this one.

- Tobe.

- Yeah.


♪ Lying in my bed ♪

♪ I hear the clock tick ♪

♪ And think of you... ♪

This was a, uh... hold on.

This was a good idea about an hour ago.

♪ Turning in circles... ♪

♪ Confusion ♪

♪ Is nothing new... ♪

- Nope, wait.

- ♪ Flashback... ♪


How many... how many hoodies is that?

It is $ worth.

The guy at the mall kiosk loves me.

- And I...

- Bet he does.


Can I borrow that? That?

Oh! My... yeah.

- I'm gonna need this.

- Okay.

♪ You picture me... ♪

Our courtship has been unconventional, so if you want to get married at city hall in front of a bunch of strangers, then that's what we'll do.

But if there is any part of you that wants the big wedding, even though it can be scary and emotional and cliché...

♪ Go slow ♪

...I think you deserve that, kid.


- Okay?


You deserve to walk down the aisle between your two stupidly handsome brothers and feel them love the crap out of you.

You deserve to spend an obscene amount of money on the perfect white dress.

- Well, like, I could...

- Oh, I know.


So, if any of that sounds good to you, then I think that that's what we should do.

And I know, listen, I know that everyone that you want to be there can't be there.

- But I think...

- ♪ I will be waiting... ♪

...that that's what he would want.

In fact, I know it is because I asked him.

Wai... wha... you asked him?

I did. I don't want to talk about it. It's guy stuff.

- Okay.

- Okay.


So, what do you say?

Will you, please... marry me?

Can't believe... Yes!

Yes, I will marry you.

♪ Watching through windows ♪

♪ I'm wondering if you're okay... ♪


♪ And you say, "Go slow" ♪

♪ I fall behind... ♪

REBECCA: Dear Judge Bradley,I noticed you had some photographs of familieson your wall,so I thought I'd send you ours.

Randall is my son, whether you approve or not,whether you sign a paper or not.

And, yes, certain things are harder for us.

Family portraits, for instance are... (LAUGHS)

...not our strong suit.

Exposure is tricky for the Pearsons, so we make do.

But the thing you need to know about usis that the Pearsons keep at it.

We don't stop.

So, I suggest you put us up on your wall.

Maybe it will help you get used to our facesbecause we will keep coming until you do your job.

Sincerely, Rebecca Pearson, Randall's mother.


Oh, my God.

Where the hell have you been?

The hospital said you came by. I...

Kevin, are you okay?

- Are... Hey, c-come inside.

- Sophie, I don't know how to do this.

How to do what? What's wrong?

I didn't just buy one, Soph.

I bought three.

I bought three because I couldn't decide which one.

Kevin, what are you...

what are you talking about?

I don't know how to be a husband to you.

I don't know how to be a father to our kids.

I don't. I-I don't have anything to give you.

There's nothing inside of me to give to you, okay?

I don't have anything.

I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm an empty shell.

Kevin, you're... you're spiraling. Okay?

What's going on? This isn't you.

No, no, no, no. This is me, okay?

This is me.

The guy who comes to your doorstep and says those things to you?

That-that-that is not me. That's not me.

That-that-that's me trying to be that guy, that guy who-who does that kind of thing or the guy who says that kind of thing to you.

That's me trying to be my dad, okay?

Or-or-or-or Toby.

Or-or every great man from every really good movie, but it's not me, okay?

I was playing a part.

You were disappointed that

I postponed my trip two times?

Trust me when I tell you I'm saving you from years of disappointment with me.

Kevin, what are you saying to me right now?

I'm saying when I... when I dream of our future together...

Sophie, it's a nightmare.

For me, okay? It's a nightmare.

Listen, I'm not trying to hurt you.

I don't want to hurt you.



♪ ♪


This has been the longest three weeks of my life.

Well, he's gonna see us today, babe.

I can... I can feel it.

We got through to him.

Mr. and Mrs. Pearson?

You've been moved to another judge.


Judge Bradley recused himself from your case.

I'll show you where you'll be.

Okay. Come on.

REBECCA: Recused? Is that a good or a bad thing?

And who do we have here?

Oh, we usually just call them one, two and three. (CHUCKLES)

So well-behaved.

Oh, give them time.



If you don't mind raising your right hand...


- JUDGE: Okay, one hand will do.

- Shh, okay. Shh, shh, shh.

- Uh, to affirm that the testimony you are about to give is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

- Yes.

- We do.

Do you wish to adopt this child as your legally adopted son?

- We do.

- We do.

And what name shall this child be known?

Um, Randall Kenneth Pearson.

You have done the hard work.

You have chosen to love. I, on the other hand, have the pleasure of signing it into law.


- Congratulations.

- Thank you so much.

- (LAUGHING): Thank you.

♪ Be here now... ♪

Thank you.

♪ As it's ♪

♪ Not ♪

♪ Like it was ♪

♪ Before... ♪

DOCTOR: Unfortunately, the cancer is not responding to the treatment.

There's not much else we can do.

I suggest you try and enjoy what time you have left.

♪ Be here ♪

♪ Now ♪

♪ And it's not ♪

♪ What it was ♪

♪ Before ♪

♪ It was... ♪


Hey, little mama.

- Hi.

- Hi, Dad.

What's going on?

- So...

- Hmm?

How was she?

Oh, man.

She was, uh... everything I thought she'd be and somehow nothing I expected.

She wants Deja back.

We're falling for this kid.

I know.

Despite ourselves, despite what everyone's told us, but we can't just...

I think about William, Beth.

William before we knew him.

He was lost, alone,missing me...


...needing me.


♪ Now... ♪


- Yeah, stop all that banging.

I heard you the first time.

Who the hell is knocking...

My name is Randall Pearson.

I'm your biological son.

years ago, you left me at the...

♪ Be here now... ♪

(WHISPERING): Ready for night-night?

RANDALL: I think of my parents...

Oh, my sweet, sweet man.

RANDALL: ...fiercely protecting me,wondering for their whole lifeif they did right by me.

♪ Before... ♪

I think about all those people making choices

about my life before I could make choices for myself.

Do anything good lately?

I don't know.


No idea.

♪ Here now... ♪

And now we're those people, Beth.

We're the adults making complicated choices about that little girl's life.

Beth, I gave Shauna our number.

I told her to call collect.

She's calling Deja tonight.

Hey, it's me.

- How you doing?