04x07 - Beacon of Truth

Episode transcripts for the 2016 TV show "Kim's Convenience". Aired October 2016 - current.*
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"Kim's Convenience" is the funny, heartfelt story of The Kims, a Korean-Canadian family, running a convenience store in Toronto's Regent Park.
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04x07 - Beacon of Truth

Post by bunniefuu »

Hi, Gerald Wow, Mr. Kim.

That's quite the get-up.

Si.

Me and my senorita, Mrs. Kim, is go to costume party.

Appa, what are you doing?

I'm a Mexican burrito.

[CHUCKLES]

- I think you mean bandito.

- Ah.

Same, same.

Appa, you can't dress like that.

It's cultural appropriation.

Hi, guys.

Just on my way to Bay Street, then going to our cottage in Muskoka.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

Oh.

So, Umma can dress like this, but I can't dress like a Mexican bandit?

How would you feel if someone from Mexico dressed in a plaid shirt and started saying, [IMITATES APPA]

"Me from Korea, me run convenience store.

" - [SUCKS BREATH]

- I be proud.

And I not talk like that.

Oh, that reminds me, Janet, where's my hanbok?

I can't find.

I don't know.

It's at our place.

What?

It was a big hit at the Halloween party.

- [BOTH GASP]

- You take my Korean dress for Halloween?

That's a cultural appropritation, Janet.

No, that's different.

I'm Korean.

You is born in Canada.

That's Korean heritage you disrespecting when you drunk-mingle with ghost, vampire, nurse who's a slut.

Janet, our culture is not costume.

[SCOFFS]

That's rich coming from a Korean guy dressed like a Mexican criminal.

I get more of, like, a fun, revolutionary sort of vibe.

Oh.

Thank you, Gerald.

Fine.

Go dressed like that.

She's just angry because we don't invite her - to Muskoka cottage.

- [APPA CHUCKLES]

You don't have Muskoka cottage.

That's what you think.

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey.

Can I get you a coffee?

- Aw.

You don't have to do that.

- Want to.

- Aw.

- [PHONE VIBRATES]

- Ah, I got a call.

- I'll bring it to you.

Dreamboat alert.

I'll take an Americano with two sugars.

Hey.

I'm just trying to be a team player.

[KNOCKING AT DOOR]

[MOUTHING]

I need that coffee ASAP.

Pretty sure she's talking to you.

Conference call.

I get it.

[SHANNON]

Uh-huh.

- [CLEARS THROAT]

- Uh, just a sec.

Could you [SNAPS FINGERS]

Door.

- Okay.

- Wow.

That's a really aggressive anti-bullying strategy.

Who's the bully now?

No, I get why it's wrong to say that.

[DOOR SLAMS]

Sometimes she gets me coffee.

It's cool.

Last week I went bra shopping with my mom.

[DRILL BUZZING]

[GERALD]

Oh, your mom called about your cousin's housewarming this weekend.

Oh!

Another one?

We're not going.

I'll just tell her we broke up.

You already did for your dad's retirement party.

Just tell her we're away.

[CHELSEA]

Mom.

Hey.

Heard about Aarav's housewarming.

Really want to be there but Gerald's just come down with shingles.

I know.

He's the worst.

[WHISPERS]

Cough.

[WHISPERS]

You said shingles.

Yeah, I might have to break up with him again.

- [COUGHS]

- Oh!

Another shingle.

Gotta go!

[KISSES]

Love you!

- [TUTTING]

- [JANET SIGHS]

Appa, stop tisking and just say what you want to say.

Hmm.

It's not good to lie to you parent.

That's how we communicate.

It's true.

If I don't tell my mom's boyfriend I love him, she cries.

So does he.

Yeah.

But you parent always know when you is lying.

Right.

So, you always knew when Jung lied to you?

Yeah.

200%.

And you knew when I lied?

Oh, Janet.

You is easiest of all, hmm?

One time I buy donut and they go missing.

I ask Janet.

She is cover with icing and say, "What donut?" I was three.

Other time, she tell me she's too sick to go to school.

She show me thermometer that say 110 degree!

I know she's just a dip in hot tea.

- You knew?

- Yeah.

We keep secret from Umma, hmm?

[JANET CHUCKLES]

And then there was band trip.

Oh, yeah.

When you was in a band.

Yeah, when I was 'in' band.

Alto saxophone!

Huh?

[CHUCKLES]

Why you stop?

Because there was no band.

Yeah!

Band trip was cancel because, uh, not enough student in band.

No!

It was a fake trip with my friends.

We made up permission slips that my dad signed.

It was amazing.

Wow.

The coolest thing my dad ever let me do was smoke one of his cigarettes.

I was five, so it was less cool, more negligent.

Okay.

Have to finish fix dresser.

[JANET]

Appa?

Well, shall we start?

Just waiting for Mrs.

Mehta.

I'm going to talk to her.

She always say traffic so bad, but I know she walk.

While you're at it, can you tell her to work on her tone?

So condescending.

And maybe she could eat a little less and bring a little more?

And if she occasionally read the book, that'd be nice.

I read it and I have four kids and three jobs.

Sorry, other way around.

- Oh, Anjali.

- My God, I'm starving.

Traffic was a nightmare.

Ooh.

I hope these are nut-free.

- Are you allergic?

- No, but nuts are so fattening.

Oh, is that this month's book?

- Mmm-hmm.

- [SIGHS]

I heard it was so-so.

Try one and tell me if it's okay?

Mmm.

Lemon squares.

Don't rind if I do.

Oh, my God!

These are amazing.

They're for a party.

Gwen's gran is turning 90.

Well, you're only as old as you feel.

She feels pretty old when you hug her.

Hopefully she can still chew 'em.

[LAUGHS]

Are you kidding?

I'd suck these down with a straw.

Now I just need a fireman calendar.

Don't ask.

So good.

- [JUNG]

Wine.

- Ah, thank you.

That's nice to hear.

What?

Nothing.

I was just thinking about the coffee from this morning.

Oh, very sweet, by the way.

Both the coffee and the gesture.

And I don't mind doing it.

Well, you offered.

It's just that when you rapped on the glass and told me you needed it ASAP, I felt more like your assistant than your boyfriend.

Oh, that wasn't it at all.

I'm sorry.

I'm I'm still trying to navigate the whole Work Shannon, Girlfriend Shannon thing.

Yeah, and I know we don't want to come across as too "couply" at work.

Exactly.

Well, I'm glad we can talk about this kind of stuff.

Oh, my God.

You've gotta stop me before I eat all these.

I got a way.

Mmm.

That for me or the lemon square?

Don't make me choose.

[APPA]

Why you read this book?

I already on page 20 and there's still no m*rder.

[SIGHS]

It's not a m*rder mystery.

Oh.

Uh.

Why is drill bit on table?

Have to empty pocket somewhere.

[SIGHS]

And Janet?

I don't know why I help.

She do such a bad thing.

Oh.

She shoplift?

Catfish?

Do drug?

No.

She lie about trip to Quebec!

- When?

- In high school.

High school not really have a band trip.

She fool us both.

Very bad.

That was seven years ago.

She also lie to us one time in Grade 5 when she pretend to be sick.

Everyone pretend to be sick.

I do just last week.

But we is her parent.

We give to her everything and she trick us.

She was a teenage.

Still complete betray.

How come you not mad?

I mad at Janet all the time.

Nice to have break.

So, if you feel like someone is bullying you, you can also keep a journal to document it.

I keep a dream journal.

Not the same thing.

Well, I'm sometimes bullied in my dreams.

Oh, that doesn't count, Terence.

Well, Stacie, I guess you're off the hook.

- In your dreams.

- [ALL CHUCKLE]

Nailed it.

Okay, good meeting.

And if you haven't had one of Kimchee's lemon squares, try one.

They're amazing.

Go easy.

I put a few out for you guys.

- The rest are for old people.

- Okay.

Ooh.

You really want another one, babe?

While she's deciding, can the rest of us dig in?

[SHANNON CLEARS THROAT]

Just thought we could go for coffee and talk.

Call me.

Okay, bye.

Everything okay?

Yeah.

I just have friend problem.

Maybe I can help.

[LAUGHS]

Janet, you a very nice girl, but you don't have lots of friend.

- I wouldn't say that.

- Okay.

Let's pretend you have lots of friend.

But all your friend want you out of friend group.

Wait.

Are you being kicked out?

Who gonna kick me out?

I kicking out Mrs.

Mehta from book club.

Oh, my God.

Hi, Young-Mi, Janet.

I got your message and was just around the corner, - so, here I am.

- [UMMA]

Great.

You want to go for a coffee?

Yeah, yeah.

I just have to get my jacket.

You haven't read The Goldfinch by chance, have you?

Just a quick summary would do.

- Uh, hey, Raj.

- Hey.

You forgot this in the car.

Oh.

I didn't take any money.

Well, after the engagement fiasco, there's not much to take.

How you doing?

Good.

Just kickin' it.

Same.

Cool.

Cool.

Good to see the art of conversation is alive and well.

Text me when you're done.

- Cool.

- He meant me.

That makes sense.

[JANET CHUCKLES]

You told me to stop you from eating the lemon squares.

Not in front of everybody like you're the bouncer for my mouth.

I was just trying to be a good boyfriend.

You're not my boyfriend here.

Also, never do that as my boyfriend.

Oh.

Okay.

I shouldn't do what you ask me.

That's not it.

It's just, I'm your boss and this is work and it doesn't look good if you're telling me - [COFFEE SPILLS]

- [SHANNON GASPS]

Damn it.

Ah.

I have a meeting in an hour.

Can you swing by my place and grab me another dress?

Sounds more like a job for Boyfriend Jung.

Are you serious?

Guys, everyone can hear you.

Should I be going to my girlfriend's and getting a dress on company time?

Sure.

Oh, hey.

While you're at it, could you grab my charger at our place?

What is with you guys?

I'm not an errand boy, okay?

Hey, Terence.

Do you mind going to Shannon's and picking out a fresh dress for her?

I was gonna say that's a little off season.

- That's okay, Terence.

- Hmm.

Why?

It's a completely different thing.

I don't mind.

Do you live in town?

So, no to the charger?

[JUNG SIGHS]

I'd go with your navy sheath dress.

It's flattering and tasteful.

Oh.

Hi, Mrs. Mehta.

- Janet.

- [UMMA]

Yobo.

Me and Mrs. Mehta going out for coffee, but, uh, I can't find my scarf.

Janet, have you seen my scarf?

- No.

- You sure?

Why would I lie about that?

Yeah, Yobo.

Why would Janet lie about that?

Because we all know Janet is a most bright beacon of truth.

Oh-kay.

It's nothing.

Just something from a long time ago that my dad's still upset about.

Or maybe you lying right now and I not upset about nothing.

- We should go for our coffee.

- Yeah.

Oh, no.

What I talking?

Of course.

Janet is a such a good girl.

She not lie about anything.

She not lie about high school band trip.

She not lie about donut.

She not lie about Raj, so, of course, we believe her when she say she not take scarf.

Who need scarf?

Okay, we go now.

Ah, what's this about Raj?

Oh, my God.

Ah.

[CHUCKLES]

Funny story.

One time, I buy donut and Janet have chocolate icing all over No.

About Raj.

- Fine.

You want the truth?

- It's okay, Janet.

Because the truth is Raj and I dated.

But that was before he got engaged.

Well, until he got engaged.

I didn't even know he was getting engaged.

Yeah.


Raj two-time Janet.

And you knew about this?

I had no idea that he was going to call off the engagement.

I mean, I kind of knew 'cause he kept saying he was going to, but I didn't believe him because he had lied to me before.

I mean, if you want to talk about lying So, uh maybe we get coffee another time?

I think that would be best.

- [APPA]

What?

- [JANET GROANS]

[APPA SIGHS]

Huh?

The scarf.

[SIGHS]

[JANET]

Can you believe Appa said that?

- I can't believe you say that.

- What?

This going to ruin my whole friendship with Mrs.

Mehta.

You were about to kick her out of book club.

No, I was going to make her think she don't want to be in book club.

Very different, Janet.

I was just telling the truth.

I thought I raise you better than that.

Well, forgive me for trying to do the right thing.

Truth is not only thing that is right.

Have to think about people's feelings.

Like my feelings and Mrs.

Mehta's feelings.

What about my feelings?

I'm not a liar.

I wish you were.

Then I might still have friend.

You might still have a friend if you had been more upfront with Mrs. Mehta about me and Raj.

There is time when it's best to not tell truth, huh?

Like when your husband eat too much.

Or your kid is throw life away, going nowhere.

Yeah, but Jung's never known what direction he's going.

Yeah, Jung.

Hmm.

No, Terence, my cats don't sometimes look like dogs.

Abort mission.

Hey, listen.

Um I've been thinking about what I said before.

Sorry, but I really can't get into this right now.

Can we just pause this until after my meeting with Amanda, okay?

Fine.

If I just sit at my desk and never get up Okay, everyone, back away from the squares.

- I never had one.

- Too bad.

I brought some for the office.

The rest are for Meemaw.

I'm so sorry.

- Unbelievable.

- What?

Kimchee just said the exact same thing that I did and now it's no big deal.

That's because he told everyone to stop eating them - and didn't call me babe.

- Why would he call you babe?

I wouldn't.

Look.

Terence is rifling through a stranger's closet right now and I look like I rode an espresso machine to work.

Dude, read the sign.

If you offer me that square, we're done.

Now no one will notice, or care about your stain.

So, I can't have one, but he can rub it all over his shirt.

- Just these.

- Ah, balloon.

- You have a party?

- Nope.

You going to party?

Nope.

Then why you buy balloon?

They're festive.

Just so you know, I'm not paying for this.

You never pay for this.

Well, I'm glad to see that some things haven't changed.

Hmm.

Not so much is change.

Just now you know that, uh, Janet and Raj I thought we were friends.

And here I was, pouring buckets of money into a wedding that you knew was a sham.

No.

And I throw money bucket, too.

Non-refundable wedding gift, fancy RSVP envelope.

We supplied those with postage.

I know.

But I lick and close before I tick beef or fish, then have to reopen, buy new envelope.

Are you telling me that you didn't know about Raj and Janet the whole time?

What I know is Raj dump Janet for Divya.

That's it.

And now he dumped Divya over Janet.

Full circle.

From Bangalore princess to shop keeper's daughter.

- No offence.

- Ah, Raj not my first choice either.

I mean, he's not engaged now, which is a step up from before, but still.

That's fair.

Maybe our happiness is depend too much on our dumb kids.

Absolutely.

Children are the worst.

I should have insisted on a vasectomy sooner.

Though I suppose if Raj and Janet were to end up together Is not the worse thing.

Raj is a doctor with very good hair.

Maybe Janet becomes a famous photographer.

It's not unheard of.

Though I've never heard of any.

As long as they is happy.

[CHUCKLES]

Good one.

Let's hope Janet has your sense of humor.

Raj is as funny as a dining room table.

Maybe it's okay.

As you say, we could do worse.

[AMANDA]

You continue to impress, Shannon.

A lot of people at head office didn't want to hire you.

- Oh.

Didn't know that.

- [CHUCKLES]

We showed them.

[AMANDA]

All right.

Um - Talk soon.

- You bet.

Hey, Amanda.

Jung Kim.

Great to see you again.

Great to see you, too.

Everything okay?

Oh, this?

Yeah.

- Missed a spot.

My mouth.

- [CHUCKLES]

Everyone keeps staring at this.

Probably because it's pretty remarkable, or whatever.

I have coffee all over my dress.

He's trying to cover for me so I don't look unprofessional.

Oh.

I don't see it at all.

It's pretty big.

Hmm.

Is it?

Well, good thing no one from head office is here.

- See you.

- [BOTH]

Bye.

I'm sorry.

No, I I think that went okay.

I mean, you came off a little bit crazy and I look like a mud puddle.

Here.

Oh.

That's not my dress.

You know what, Shannon?

A simple "thank you" would suffice.

[APPA]

Hi.

Hey.

What time is it, Janet?

8:45.

Hmm.

Because my phone say 8:46.

Oh, my God.

I'm sorry I lied to you about a tiny thing a long time ago, but not as sorry as telling you about it.

It's not a tiny thing.

It's a big thing to me.

Because you is [APPA SIGHS]

Umma is a sneak att*ck.

And Jung?

We always fight.

But, you, Janet?

- It's okay.

- We's all family.

And we love all people in family.

It's okay, Appa.

Not same.

You don't have to say it.

What?

What you think I going to say?

That, you know Yes, family is family, but you and I - Well, it's different.

- How?

I mean, of course I love Umma and Jung.

But, with you Mmm-hmm.

What, Janet?

That [SIGHS]

I is you favorite.

Why?

Is that what you were going to say before?

Why?

Is that what you going to say right now?

I don't know.

Such a liar.

Who knows what I was going to say?

We all know Janet is not [imitates [APPA]

most "bright beacon of truth.

" No.

Have to tell truth about this.

I would, but I have to go practice my saxophone.

Now you is my least favorite.

I know you're lying.

- Take one to know one.

- Can't hear you.

Can't hear you more.

Then why did you just say that?

What?

Can't hear you still.

[UMMA]

I'm sorry about other day.

We just feel it's not our place I know.

But it was just so humiliating.

My friend's daughter breaking up my son's wedding because of a secret relationship.

It's like the plot of one of those silly books I'm never reading.

But our friendship is strong.

Agreed.

So strong it can handle all kinds of problem or disagreement, and still we won't be mad or hold grudge.

Absolutely.

For example Sometimes at the book club, uh, some people think it would be better if you don't come any more.

What?

I mean, because book club is ending.

Nobody come any more, so also you don't come any more.

I don't come.

Nobody come.

Hmm.

When did this happen?

It come up after last meeting.

Everybody so busy, so I want to tell you in person.

Well, that's very thoughtful.

Maybe we should start our own book club.

Yeah.

Maybe.

Just can't be same night as old book club.

Too many fond memories?

Yeah.

- Like that.

[CHUCKLES]

- [CHUCKLES]
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