01x02 - Jonas, dette er helt dust

Episode transcripts for the 2015 TV show "Skam". Aired: September 25, 2015 to June 2017.*
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"Skam" is about the daily life of teenagers at the Hartvig Nissens upper secondary school (Hartvig Nissens skole) in Oslo.
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01x02 - Jonas, dette er helt dust

Post by bunniefuu »

Hi.

Hi friend.

Are you in Oslo now?

No, my flight from Geneva is booked so I'm here until tomorrow.

No...

But I'm in Oslo tomorrow afternoon.

But I'm going to the cabin tomorrow.

Oh yeah, that's true!

Where was it you're going?

To Ingrid's cabin, with Igrid and Sara.

So nice! Who will drive you guys?

No, we'll take the bus.

The bus? Can't you wait? If you wait a day, I can drive you.

But I've been looking forward to the cabin for over a month.

Yeah, I know.

But I'm coming home on Saturday.

Yeah... On Saturday I-

It looks like I'll leave again on Friday night.

Do you have enough money?

Yeah.

I'll wire you a little bit extra, so you guys can have fun.

Thanks.

Okay, have a good trip and say hi to Igrid and Sara.

Yeah, thanks. You too.

Okay, we'll talk.

We will. Take care!

Sorry, sorry!

Isak!

Should we send him home?

Okay, we'll just do that.

What time is it even?

Eh, ten past nine.

Ten past nine?!

Why did you come so f*cking early?

Play "I'm Yours".

No!

You only know gay songs.

Shut up! Is that a gay song?

Who is it?

Jonas?

Elias.

Your new lover?

What are you talking about?

You know what I'm talking about. You ran after him the entire school day.

Hello?

Oh, Elias? I'm so happy to be talking to you. I think I love you.

Maybe we can get married. Then we'll go on our honeymoon in March and live alone for the rest of our lives.

Love each other.

What's the deal with Jonas and Ingrid?

Huh?

You heard what I said.

You have to ask Jonas.

Why do you ask?

I saw a notification on his phone.

I know that you know something.

Can't you just say it? I promise I won't get angry.

I promise I won't tell Jonas you said something.

They text?

Maybe a little.

In which stadium does the English Cup Final take place? -Wembley.

That's correct.

What bone in your body gets broken most often? -Collarbone.

Yep.

Who was the first president of the USA?

George Washington.

Okay, Eva. Who was the first female Prime Minister of Norway?

I'm not joining.

She can't answer.

I do, I just don't want to join.

Just answer, then we won't nag anymore.

I didn't hear the question. -Who was Norway's first female Prime Minister?

Erna Solberg.

f*ck you guys!

Why are you so pissed?

I'm not pissed. I just think Trivial Pursuit is boring.

Okay?

What do you want to play, then? Something that isn't so boring.

Nothing. I want to read.

Come on! You must want to do something.

Okay.

I want to play "My ship is loaded with.."

Then we'll play "My ship".

I'll start.

My ship is loaded with Ingrid.

My ship is loaded with Erna Solberg.

Okay, eh.. My ship is loaded with insects.

My ship is loaded with ice.

My ship is loaded with-

What the f*ck? What was that?

sh*t. f*ck.

Did you see it?

No.

So weird.

Really strange.

It's..
Hello?

Hi!

The f*ck?

Elias!

Jonas!

What's up?

You came!

Of course I came!

How did you find it?

Embedded GPS in my brain.

No, I asked a guy at the parking space up there.

Hello.

Hello.

Hello.

Hi.

So this is where you guys hang?

Really cool.

Good atmosphere at least.

It'll be a party.

Where should I sleep?

In the bedroom with Isak.

I'll sleep with the gay guy?

Why is everyone calling me gay?

You are gay.

He's joking. Have a little humor.

What? He asked if he could come. What should I have said?

That was really awesome.

Yeah, it works now.

Do you need help?

You set the table?

Yes.

Hm, looks good. Can I taste it?

Good.

We're gonna have a smoke.

Smoke?

Yeah, a smoke.

You don't even smoke.

Come on, it's a party.

Yeah, it's a party.

You really don't need help?

No.

Food's ready!

Jonas!

Seriously?

Not funny.

It's a little funny.

You're able to help yourself, aren't you?

Why are you so pissed all the time?

I'm pissed because you're behaving like a complete jerk.

Jerk? What did I do?

Say what I did!

You invited loads of people to a cabin trip that was just supposed to be us.

Two guys?

Yes.

You change personalities once Elias is around.

And you're texting with Ingrid behind my back, when you know how much of a bitch she is to me!

Ingrid? I'm not going behind your back talking to Ingrid!

What did she say I did?

You think I don't know you text her?

I texted with her about French.

About French?

During fall break?

We have homework for after the break.

Yeah okay, if it's about French, I can read the messages.

Why would you read my messages?

You can read my messages!

I don't need to read your messages.

Why?

You have to read my messages so we can trust each other? -Yeah.

That's ridiculous!

Jonas!

This is ridiculous!

What the f*ck? Why do you think that I talk to Ingrid?

It's true, right?

Yeah, about school!

Can I see your messages?

I already told you it's ridiculous!

Why don't you trust me?
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