Previously on "Batwoman"
- So you're into me.
- You would know.
- I'll call you then.
- I'd like that.
LUKE: Bruce never stopped looking for your sister's body.
Guy had the best tech on the planet.
Why didn't he find her?
KATE: I think Alice is Beth.
MARY: I thought they found her body.
They found bone fragments.
Skull fragments matching Beth's DNA.
She's your daughter!
King of the Crows can't even protect your own nest.
How'd you get in my house?
You're making this personal, Alice.
It is personal!
What the hell do you want?
You're gonna tell me everything you know about Alice.
You're not Batman.
That's the point.
[CLAIRE WYNDHAM'S "WOLVES" PLAYING]
WYNDHAM: Tick, tick, tick, tock Time is running out for us To go underground Biting at our heels Breaking the skin and the flesh and the bone Everybody's running from something Everybody's running from something Want to run with me?
Everybody's running from something Everybody's running from something Shiny, shiny.
WYNDHAM: Baby, run with me [ALARM BLARING]
VESPER: Keep your Tiffanys close and your Mikimoto closer, Gotham.
Last night marks the third bling theft in a week, this time nearly killing a guard in the process.
Well, today, everyone is asking "Where was Batwoman?" Hot off the heels of her citywide debut, and she's a no-show.
Seriously, was she curling her hair, overcome by the myriad of red lipstick shades, going through a breaku REAGAN: Thank you.
Going through a breakup?
That woman literally risked her life protecting this city.
Well, I heard she's doing Batman.
- Oh, you heard?
From who Killer Croc?
I kind of like her actually.
Gotham could use a woman's touch.
Um, so you're into redheads now?
No, not at this exact moment.
[CELL PHONE VIBRATING]
I hate whoever that is.
It's my my, um my friend type thing.
Because that's what that just sounded like.
It's a guy friend, a co-worker.
We we share an office space.
The, uh water main broke.
That sounds really serious.
I should probably go.
You come over superlate, you leave before breakfast.
I feel like I could date you and start a new hobby.
I'll make it up to you.
I have to go.
I have to go.
- Ha ha ha!
- Stay dry.
I have to go.
KATE, VOICE-OVER: A wise woman once said, "Hurt me with the truth.
Don't comfort me with a lie.
" Yes, Bruce.
I'm quoting Rihanna because I'm not a liar.
I have never hidden who I am.
I came out when Brad Morrison told all the kids at school that I was gay.
I said, "Yeah, and?" Then punched him.
Ever since then, I've been out and proud as long as I can remember, so how the hell am I supposed to wake up every morning and hide who I am?
WOMAN: That is brilliant, uh, but do watch the glare, Margot.
MARGOT: Can I get a bounce card?
Want to tell me what the hell is going on?
You must be Roxanna.
Such a pleasure, Miss Kane.
The museum of antiquities is so grateful you're lending us Martha Wayne's necklace.
We cannot think of a better showpiece to represent strong women and pillars of their community.
She always loved your museum.
Margot, is that the last lens change?
- Shall we get a few mores shots?
And then we can get out of miss Kane's hair.
- Where have you been?
I'm seeing someone.
So while you've been That, Magpie struck again.
She nuked a place last night, nearly killed a security guard.
ROXANNA: The vine work is so, uh, earth chic.
KATE: It's a work in progress.
Well, with that giant Wayne sign on the building, I'm sure whatever it is will make Gotham proud.
- No pressure, right?
- I'll have our security team bring the necklace to the event tomorrow.
With everything that's been happening around the city, you can never be too careful.
So that is not why I called.
So your pet Dodgson, not looking too good and probably no smelling great.
What are we doing here?
KATE: He hangs out until he tells us Alice's grand plan.
- Or he dies.
- He's just dehydrated.
- He's septic.
- Were you this annoying when Batman took people prisoner?
I didn't think so.
He needs an E.
Does your husband know what's in plot 283, Catherine?
Your driver's gone nighty-night.
He's on a benzo break.
What are you doing here?
The great existential question.
What are we all doing here?
You know the thing I love about bad guys?
Is that despite ourselves we are all so tragically predictable.
Of course, you'd follow the cards I left right back there to cover your tracks.
What do you want?
To keep this to myself, and in return, you are gonna give me something, a very powerful toy.
I understand that Hamilton Dynamics is developing a very "top-secret" weapon.
I own one of the largest defense companies in the country.
I'm hardly privy to its day-to-day project management side.
Oh, but you are.
You are the priviest because this particular project was your idea.
How do you know that?
Well, I spent in an hour in your house, Catherine.
What did you think I was just poking around your shoe closet?
Which should be its own monument by the way.
You are gonna give it to me by 10 p. m. tomorrow, or Commander Kane will know that you're the one who convinced him his dear, darling daughter was dead.
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Huge fan but not in, like, an annoying way.
Can I just say welcome to Gotham, and you know what?
Screw the haters.
I once wore this jumpsuit, and it was bordering on last season [DEEPER VOICE]
I need your help.
I heard you're discreet.
So he actually just tried to kill me, so that's not me saying no.
It's just slightly more complicated.
Why do you have him?
I need to know what Alice is planning.
This is grossly infected.
You don't have any neosporin in your batbelt?
Can you save him?
I can try because I actually subscribe to a code.
It's called do no harm.
I'll be back for him.
We'll be here.
KATE, VOICE-OVER: If I wanted to be a beacon of hope to Gotham, I needed to show them that I was there.
I had to restore their confidence in the Bat, and to do that, I needed to catch Gotham's most dangerous thief.
LUKE: Batcave to Batwoman.
How long have you waited to say that?
Honestly, it just came to me two seconds ago, so - What do you want?
- I've been thinking why is this Magpie Woman so hard to track?
You know, police can't find her, she's one step ahead of the Crows.
No trace of her on any city surveillance, and then it occurred to me Everyone's looking for a woman when we should be looking for a bird.
FLAY'S "BLACK WAVE" PLAYING]
FLAY: Black wave coming, will it hit?
I can taste the fear Yeah, it's written on my lips Do we have to be on opposite sides?
Birds of a feather should flock together.
I'm allergic to feathers.
Black wave coming, will it drop?
Really committed to this whole bird thing, aren't you?
Really think it's worth that?
Maybe not to you, but to me, it's food, a roof over my head, and a modicum of dignity.
More like Batawhiff.
According to the gallery security footage, last night our lady crusader missed the return on her not-so-trusty Batarang and caused some major damage to a gilded vase that once belonged to Marie Antoinette, and we thought Magpie was a threat to this city.
Talk to me, Gotham.
Do we need to take out an insurance policy on our new hero?
You probably miscalculated the position.
- I didn't.
- Maybe you angled it wrong.
- Maybe it's broken.
- It's not broken.
If it worked, I would have caught it.
Did you try flipping your wrist back You're Batsplaining.
I already have the whole city on my ass.
I do not need you joining in the chorus.
Well, good news, bad news.
I figured out what you ripped off Magpie's belt last night Grenades.
Yeah, cute but no less deadly.
Concussion or fragmentation?
Probably an M-67 filled with TNT or gunpowder.
I'll know more after I run a chemical analysis.
It could help us track down Magpie.
How long will that take?
Depending on the complexity of the deformulation Hour and a half.
I'll see you then.
Where you going?
I owe someone a lunch.
I'll be here, not dating anyone because I love to work.
Love to work.
This is great.
[CELLO PLAYING BACH'S "CELLO SUITE NO.
Alice was playing it when she broke into the penthouse the other night.
Alice plays the Cello?
That's so on brand.
Beth played the Cello.
This was her favorite piece.
Do you think What'd you bring me?
The report detailing the bomb that blew up Alice's transport Van.
I thought you'd want to see it before anyone else.
It's an ied using high standard components.
The convoy had 7 vehicles.
It hit Alice's Van with a 99.
Bomb probably used an advanced sensor initiation to detect its target.
A sensor with that level of detection is unreleased technology unique to Hamilton Dynamics.
What are you saying?
Bomb's one of ours?
Why would someone at Hamilton want to ambush the convoy?
REAGAN: You're living with polar bears under the borealis, no rent, no traffic, no getting mugged in line grabbing a coffee.
Why the hell did you move back here?
- Long story.
- So an ex-girlfriend.
- Told you I could read people.
Her name is Sophie, and she's in the past, and according to her, we never even had a past, so there's that.
You came home for your ex who doesn't see you as an ex?
Sounds like I have nothing to worry about.
Why am I talking about her?
I used to live there.
Before it was that, it was a small, charming 10-unit place full of sweet, neighborly, hard-working people, who all got exiled to parts of the city that no one cared about.
Meanwhile, all the predatory real estate moguls who don't give a crap about the lives they're uprooting get rich.
You were literally evicted from your childhood.
Not that I wanted to live in a Crows district anyway.
- No offense.
- You googled me.
Of course I did.
No one's allowed to have secrets anymore.
So does that mean you will tell me where we're going for lunch?
My Mom taught English to the woman who owns the place.
She's supercute and has the best tofu paneer.
I think you're gonna like it.
[CELL PHONE VIBRATING]
Another plumbing emergency?
Uh, electrical fire in the ventilation system.
That sounds like a real mess.
What is that you do again?
Just keeping tabs on my cousin's building.
Not so good at it, huh?
There's a fundraiser later at the antiquities museum.
Want to be my date?
Please, please, please, please.
Hold you to it.
You got to be kidding me.
She stole the necklace.
She took it by feathers and force.
I'll let the museum know they're losing their showpiece.
Bruce's Mom was killed for that necklace.
He spent years looking for it in the streets, finally found it in an auction, and spent $1 million buying it back.
I should have been here.
I have to get it back.
Any leads on the bomb?
Magpie 3-D printed them.
- That's new.
- Yeah, I know.
Nanothermites via inkjet.
- Explosive ink?
- It's regulated.
Only a few companies sell it.
Then we find everyone that it's sold to.
Well, you now, the Crows do track munition shipments in and out of the city.
You could ask your girl Sophie if she can get a list of who's buying exploding ink.
It's bad timing.
Bad timing, a bomber loose in Gotham.
I SOPHIE: Exploding ink.
KATE: Magpie used one to break into Wayne Tower.
She take anything?
My aunt Martha's Pearl necklace.
Does your Dad know?
Heard the Bat had a run-in with her the other night.
I thought they were calling her Batwoman now.
Is that official?
I think so.
It's catchy, mature.
So if she's on the case, why are you?
You know why.
I don't trust vigilantes.
How's the search going?
Just texted it to you.
Everyone within a 100-mile radius who recently purchased explosive ink.
I really appreciate it.
I'm glad you came to me.
I know things between us have been a little tense, but we always make a good team.
I have to go.
ALICE: So clever of Catherine to send you boys to find my cozy burrow, but you're not the only ones with ears all around this city.
When you start asking about our location, it gets back to me.
Desperate, desperate Catherine Hamilton-Kane sending her goons to clean up her mess.
Perhaps she needs a little reminder that I'm not playing games!
Who wants to help me send her a message, hmm?
Eeny, meeny, miny, moe.
- It was him.
You pointed at him.
Like I said, I'm not playing a game.
There are no rules.
Uh, another construction firm, fireworks manufacturer, gold mining company.
This shipment doesn't have a destination.
Can you key the address?
Let me check.
Sophie thinks I'm the Bat.
- Because I suck at hiding it.
How did Bruce make living a double life look so easy?
Oh, he didn't.
He was miserable.
Guy had 3 ferraris and slept with half of Gotham.
The playboy thing gave him a cover.
Different women meant he could tell the same lies easily, but sucked for him, too.
Honestly, in those last few months, I think being Batman was easier for him than being Bruce.
So the address is a P. O. box.
You can send explosives to a P. O. box?
If you don't want to get caught.
KATE: I just got to the old Gotham hotel, the address linked to the P. O. box account.
Guy at the facility gave it to me.
Do I want to know how you got him to tell you that?
Let him take a selfie.
Definitely not the answer I was expecting.
Let me guess.
Batman never posed for selfies.
Wasn't gonna say it.
I think I found Magpie's nest.
I see jewelry, a computer, 3-D printer, and my breath ring's freezing.
Oh, that's smart.
If anyone enters, their body heat will raise the room's temperature and set off an explosion.
You may want to lead with that.
Sorry, but yo.
Check this out.
The suit can lower your body temperature to match the room and bypass the sensors.
That is uncomfortably cold.
Rather cold than dead.
One more thing.
You know you can't breathe, right?
- You're kidding me.
- I didn't invent kinetic energy.
How long can you hold your breath for?
Gets dicey after two minutes.
That's as long as you got.
Actually, now might be a good time to let you know that I fixed the Batarang, and by fixed, I mean realized it was calibrated for Bruce, who has longer arms than you.
Guess it wasn't entirely your fault.
You're probably thinking some pretty choice words right now, but since you'll blow up if you say them out loud, probably best to keep them to yourself.
Anyway, all fixed, recalibrated for you, a woman with slightly shorter arms.
While you're in there if you can try to clone a copy of her hard drive, that'd be great.
Might give us a clue into what Magpie gets her talons into next.
Definitely been a minute.
Don't answer that.
Did you just [MUMBLES]
Don't want to.
I'm not actually Ali [MOANING SOFTLY]
Curiouser and curiouser.
Where am I?
You're in the rabbit hole, darling, with the caterpillar and the mad hatter and the Queen of Hearts.
I'm actually quite happy you're here.
You see, I've foolishly forgotten the details of my evil plan.
Perhaps you could stir up a memory or two.
She she thinks it's me you care about.
Finish your thought.
The Batwoman thinks I care about whom?
She has no idea.
About about who?
She has big plans for him.
- KATE: In position.
- LUKE: Let me know when you see her.
Way too much tempting bling for her not show.
What is that noise?
Magpie had some complicated schematics for something on her hard drive.
They're encrypted, but I'll try printing them.
Whatever it is could be her next target and help us track her down.
I got to go.
You invited her to a takedown.
I invited her on a date that just happens to be at the takedown location.
I don't need to tell you that Batman would have never done that.
Is it done?
Does this look done to you?
Oh, my God.
That bitch is a rare breed of psychopath, okay?
Take your money, take your power.
I don't care.
It is your mess, Catherine.
You want her gone, do it yourself.
[CELL PHONE VIBRATING]
This is Catherine.
ALICE: "'Oh, dear, oh, dear.
I shall be too late, '" said the rabbit, tapping at his watch.
" WOMAN: I like the way you move with me I like the way you move I like the way you move with me I like the way you move I like the way you move with me I like the way you move SOPHIE: Kate.
Sophie, um, I didn't know you were working the event.
I wasn't, but I figured with a jewelry thief on the prowl we could use the extra manpower.
Of course you did.
- Reagan, hi.
- I'm sorry I'm late.
I didn't realize you were here with anyone.
I got us drinks.
You two have fun.
So I don't know about you, but I'm gonna drink this and pretend it's not totally uncomfortable that your ex is here.
I'm being a really crappy date.
Can we start over and I mention how beautiful you look?
Thank you, and I hate that that worked.
ROXANNA: Miss Kane, welcome.
I'm so glad you made it.
I'm sorry the pearls didn't.
What do you mean?
Didn't Luke Fox get in touch with you?
Yes, but I was just so relived when the security guard showed up with them in the nick of time.
Ladies and gentlemen, tonight, we are here to celebrate powerful women throughout history, and who better embodies that than Martha Wayne?
It is with utmost gratitude to the Wayne estate that I present to you tonight's showpiece, her beloved pearl necklace.
Would you excuse me for a minute?
I was just about to call you.
Martha's necklace is at the exhibit, which is impossible because we never gave it to the museum.
That is not her necklace.
It's a replica.
It's the last thing that Magpie printed.
She snuck a bomb in here.
Why would Magpie bomb the museum?
It's a trojan horse.
Use the explosion in the showroom as a distraction, and she'll have free rein over the exhibit room.
The Wayne family has been a hallmark to Gotham, and their legacy lives on even today.
Ladies and gentlemen, it looks like we have a little situation on our hands.
SOPHIE: Everyone, please move towards the exit.
MAN: Everyone, calmly towards the exit.
Ha ha ha ha!
I'm not meant to be a jailbird.
Looks like you have a choice to make.
The shiny jewels are all insured, but those sitting ducks only have one life.
Which are you gonna save?
Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!
Mommy, I found a marble.
It's really you.
[GRAPPLING LINE FIRES]
I've seen you before.
You're the photographer.
You weren't just taking photos at Wayne Tower.
You were casing it.
People like you never notice people like me.
You put a lot of lives in danger tonight.
Well, some of us don't have the privilege of sitting in our tower, having angst about what to do with our lives, Miss Kane.
They just do it to survive.
Time to go to blackgate, Margot.
Did you see that?
I was on a call.
Batwoman showed up.
It was surreal.
I tried calling you.
I must have been in a dead zone.
You just said you were on a call.
I So here's why this sucks.
I like you.
You're funny, you're cool, but that's not really enough.
I'm not a needy person, Kate, but if I'm gonna make an effort, miss a spin class or rearrange a work shift, all I ask for is a little honesty.
Here's why this sucks.
I think you're fun and cool and seem to care about all the right things But I'm not in a place right now where I can share all of myself with someone else.
I am sorry.
I get it.
You obviously have a lot going on.
I just hope whatever it is makes you happy.
Well this is a nice surprise.
Sweetheart, you okay?
Alice came to me today.
She she came to you?
Are you all right?
Yeah, I'm fine.
She didn't hurt me.
She wants something.
Hamilton is developing a new project, and Alice has taken interest.
It doesn't matter.
I refuse to put any weapon into the hands of a terrorist.
[CELL PHONE VIBRATING]
Don't answer that.
It could be her.
Well, if it's her, I should get it.
You should hear this from me.
Sweetheart, what's going on?
It was years ago.
I thought it was the right thing to do.
You thought what was the right thing to do?
You and Kate wouldn't stop looking.
Kate was up all night.
She wasn't going to school, she was refusing to eat.
She wouldn't give up, and she wasn't living her life, and the more despair that she felt, the more broken you became.
What did you do, Catherine?
You were both in a downward spiral, Jacob.
You never would have moved on if you didn't Think that Beth were dead.
They found bones, skull fragments.
Hamilton Employees found bones from a deer.
I paid the DNA analyst to write the report.
The police, my investigators, the entire city had been looking and looking for Beth without finding so much as a sock, Jacob.
- She was gone.
Get away from me.
Just Just get away from me.
[HEART MONITOR BEEPING]
You have to stop doing that.
Sudden adrenaline release can lead to cardiac arrest, and I am way too busy to have a heart condition right now.
You fixed him?
An hour later, and may not have been able to.
You were right.
I shouldn't have let him get this bad.
So on that topic, I may have prodded him a little while he was under a morphine haze.
I know, but he ruined my favorite plaid shirt when he stabbed me, so my point is Alice is looking for a mouse or someone named Mouse.
He said Mouse, and she has big plans for him.
So thought you should know.
You can't just gah!
What is that?!
- A what?
- Chipped him.
He leads me Alice, if figure out who Mouse is.
Good work, Mary.
[CELLO PLAYING BACH'S "CELLO SUITE NO.
VESPER: The bomb-loving bird is finally in a cage, where she belongs.
Batwoman clipped her wings, and she wasn't very sweet about it either.
You have such a pretty face.
Ever think about smiling more?
LUKE: Another win in the Batcolumn.
Almost got a compliment out of Vesper Fairchild, too.
I reunited a bunch of billionaires with things they probably didn't miss.
You also saved a lot of innocent lives.
The city trusts you now.
They trust Batwoman.
Kate Kane is a different story.
What do you know about real estate?
Um, everyone hates popcorn ceilings.
So more than me.
I'm starting a real estate firm.
So the last thing the city needs is another predatory developer cluttering the skyline.
That's why I want to buy run-down buildings from outside the Crows districts, keep the rents low, and give them back to the community.
So Bruce was a billionaire playboy, and you're gonna be who Joanna Gaines?
- You can be chip.
- I just told you I don't know anything about real estate.
Well, you better learn quick because you're gonna be my assistant.
Up for debate.
KATE, VOICE-OVER: Dear Bruce, Queen Rihanna was right.
Lies don't make anyone comfortable, especially the one telling them, but no one said anything about this job being comfortable.
If I'm going to embrace the Bat, then I'm going to have to embrace hiding a part of myself from the outside world.
Living this double life is a sacrifice But our city is worth it.