01x18 - If You Believe In Me, I'll Believe In You

[bunniefuu]

All there.

Used unmarked bills as promised.

Congratulations.

You're now the new proud of owner of 7 hearts, 14 kidneys, 7 livers, 14 lungs, and 14 corneas.

Some disassembly required.

Oof! Aah!

Huh! Agh!

Over there! She went that way!

Ugh!

Aah!

Agh!

I'm just saying. Like, a braid or something could help.

I am not wearing a braid.

Congratulations! On behalf of the medical profession both licensed and unlicensed, I'd like to offer my sincerest whatup on shutting down that chop shop.

I wasn't sure how you guys celebrated.

Usually by icing my knuckles.

For you.

So this is what a victory lap looks like.

Trafficker got away, some asshat yanked my wig, almost pulled off my cowl.

Who could have predicted that 30,000 strands of grab-me red hair would be like waving a flag in front of a bull?

What if you ran an electrical charge through the cowl so that the next person who tried to get grabby would have 10,000 volts of hands off?

As much as I love the thought of wrapping my head in lightning...

Right. Dumb.

Uh, I've had a few of these.

Withdrawn.

We will celebrate as soon as we get this organ-stealing creep behind bars.

Okay. Well... Go Batteam, which I'm not on...

So I'm just taking the champagne.

Backing away. Heh.

The cowl shock thing not the worst idea.

She wants to be part of this, and the answer is no.

She doesn't want to be part of this as much as she wants to be part of your life.

Then I will take her out for dinner.

We need to focus on your dad's journal.

If that thing really is the cookbook of Wayne Enterprises' best-kept secrets, we need to find where Tommy Elliot hid it.

So where do we start?

Whichever aisle's the property seized from Tommy Elliot.

Ha ha ha! Of course Tommy collected, like, every Kitty Delgado comic.

Ha ha! Oh, my God.

There's no way a cat burglar's squeezing into those tight spaces with those jubblies.

Hmm. Ha ha!

So if I were the smoking g*n that links Tommy Elliot to the m*rder of Lucius Fox, where would I be?

Oh, I don't know, luv, but I hope The Crows pay overtime.

I'll settle for hazard pay.

Tell me you found that journal.

We've gone through the entire place, which is basically a shrine to his twig and berries, but alas, no Lucius Fox journal.

The guy owned at least 40 buildings in Gotham alone.

Who knows where he could have stashed it?

Well, there is one person who knows.

Ha ha!

Ah. Kandy Kane.

Well, your... your real estate business must really be tanking if you were willing to let them frisk you for, what, a few how-tos.

Believe it or not, Tommy boy, I'm not here for a measuring contest.

Oh. That's too bad.

Speaking of being the bigger man, have you heard from Bruce?

Visiting hours are 4 days a week.

He's a total no-show.

Is that any way to treat your best friend?

It is if he k*lled his actual best friend... Lucius Fox.

That's an outrageous lie.

Lucius was never Bruce's best friend.

Of course that would be your takeaway.

What did Lucius Fox ever do for Bruce?

You mean, besides turning Wayne R&D into the world leader in defense technology?

Oh, but you already knew that.

That's why you had him k*lled... for his journal.

You wanted the keys to the candy store.

Where's the journal now, Tommy?

I miss... I miss my mommy!

Can I talk to her?

That's okay, Tommy.

The guy you hired to pull the trigger, he's had a lot to say.

Thanks for stopping by, double-K, and tell your cousin the bells are on!

It's fine. Thank you.

Get out of my cell.

But yours is so much roomier than mine, and there's going to be a vacancy when they strap you to the electric chair for murdering Lucius Fox.

Zzzt! Zzzt!

Oh, but, Alice, haven't you heard?

I'm crazy! 100% unfit to stand trial.

Mmm. Not anymore, I'm afraid.

I got a call this morning from a judge asking my opinion in regards to your fitness to stand trial.

As Arkham's Chief Medical Officer, I could hardly lie, so The Crows will be here soon to collect you.

But we can help you.

Why... would you help me?

Because you're gonna help us.

I couldn't help but listen in to your little visit with Kate Kane because when my sister wants something, I want it more.

What's so special about the dearly departed Lucius Fox's journal just between us bad guys?

I'm sorry.

Are you two working together?

What's going on here?

You can answer the question voluntarily, or we will extract it.

Heh.

Supposedly, it's a failsafe to k*ll the Bat if the suit ever got into the wrong hands.

Why's Bruce Wayne's R&D guy telling dear diary about that?

Because Bruce Wayne's Batman.

Curiouser and curiouser.

And now I want to know all the more where is the book?

Hmm.

I'm just debating should I hand it over to...

Gotham's most prolific k*ller for nothing in return?

Give us the journal, and we will let you walk out of here.

Really? Just out into the street where every wanted poster will have my...

Face on it?

Not if we get you a new one.

Oh. Tch.

This is what it's like bartering with a psychopath.

Ahem.

We can make you into anyone you want to be... real, imagined...

Whoever your little heart desires.

So do we have a deal?

You called it. Whatever you said must have rattled Tommy's cage.

22 minutes since you left Arkham, and there's already an outgoing call to...

Address says the lookout.

Isn't that Johnny Sabatino's club?

Technically, but Tommy owns the building.

Hmm. Rumor has it, that Sabatino's been laundering Tommy's money through that club for years.

That is one posh laundromat.

Tommy, how's the padded palace, buddy?

I'm hoping to make it a distant memory.

Listen. Remember that item I had you hold onto?

Ha ha! What? The one that you had me break into your office at 4:00 in the morning to get the night you were arrested?

No idea what you're talking about.

Oh, yeah. It's still here.

Living rent-free.

Well, it's time for it to come home.

Understood. I'll be in touch to work out the details.

Well, at least we know where the journal is.

Yeah, at a very high floor of a mob-infested nightclub.

How would you like to infiltrate that?

By walking through the front door.

Uh-oh. Wait. Can you feel that?

Nope. Feeling nothing. What is happening?

Mmm. I think you feel it.

I think you feel it. Mm-hmm.

Okay. Come on. Say it.

We're... going clubbing.

We're going clubbing.

Sss! Yech.

Okay. So these are all the finalists because they deliver on the sss and Batgadget concealment because we want to hide the goods but not hide the goods, you feel me?

Okay. The goal is to blend in.

Yeah, but at this place, standing out is blending in.

I mean, The Lookout is the hottest club in Gotham... no offense to your bar.

It's... you know, it's more of a lounge.

Mm-hmm. And fortunately, your Batboots are both functional and on trend.

What's in that one?

Oh. That is...

♪ Mine ♪

Ha! Check it!

How insane is this?

Oh, but if you want to wear it instead, you can.

You're not going, Mary. What?

I'm sorry. It's too dangerous.

Dangerous? I have been poisoned, stabbed, and nearly exsanguinated, and the fact that I have lived to use that word as a verb is proof that I can look out for myself.

That place will be filled with mobsters.

Which is why you need backup.

Ahem. I already have it.

I thought there weren't any more spots on the Batteam.

Oh. I'm just an honorary member, luv.

The Crows plucked her from the SRR.

She's literally trained for this.

Seriously, it's nothing personal, and thank you so much for all of this.

♪ Look at me ♪ Sounds like Soph's on her way to arrest Tommy Elliot.

Huh. Good for Soph. Yeah.

Robles's confession. They're charging Tommy with Lucius Fox's m*rder.

Luke will be glad to hear that.

Is all official Crows business conducted using hamburger emojis?

It's a cheeseburger.

Nah. She wanted to see if I was up for celebrating.

You never mentioned she was a burger connoisseur.

Well, just don't bother trying to convince her that kimchi is the best topping.

Oh, I've already taken that hill.

It's her new favorite.

♪ Uh-huh, so cool, it's the talk of the town ♪

♪ And wow, uh-huh ♪

♪ Listen now 'cause I'll break it down now ♪

♪ It's time to get to places I want to go ♪ When?

What do you mean?

When did you find time to take on that hill?

Don't you two have, like, work or something?

All we do is work, luv.

Between the late hours and all this stress with her mum, let's just say greasy food's her best mate right now.

Her mom?

Yeah. She came out to her mum.

Seriously?

Gravely serious, I'm afraid.

Her mum's not talking to her.

Soph's a right mess.

Good evening, party crashers.

Tuxedo One, you have a date with the utility hub one level down.

Red One, there's an employee bathroom on the north end.

Could be a good place for a wardrobe change.

Copy that. 10-4.

♪ That classic way that you move ♪

♪ Okay, okay, now you got my attention ♪

♪ Can't take my eyes off of you ♪ Kate?

Reagan?

Hi. What are you doing here?

Don't you have a club of your own now?

I'm checking out the competition.

Promise not to tell your boss?

Only if you let me make you a drink on the house and you promise not to tell my boss.

Deal. I actually stopped by The Holdup a couple of times.

I was hoping, I don't know, maybe I would run into you.

I don't really oversee the day-to-day.

Too busy? Yeah. I remember.

At the risk of sounding even more stalkery, I've been following your real estate endeavors.

Buying up property around Bennett Park and actually lowering the rents?

Heh.

This city could use a lot more Kate Kane.

♪ I really like long walks on the beach ♪

♪ I really like playing hide-and-seek ♪

♪ I really like to dance to the b*at ♪ Cheers. Cheers.

♪ Heart, eyes, overload, it's irresistible ♪ This is really good.

It's called an...

I sort of thought you'd fight harder to win me back, and I've regretted walking away ever since.

That is very specific.

Any chance you know how to make a Kate Kane is a total idiot? Mm-hmm.

Can you ask her to make you a what the hell are you doing?

You have a mission to complete.

Is your ear okay?

It's fine. Can you hear that annoying whining sound?

Hilarious.

No, I don't.

I'm gonna get an advil. Okay.

Smooth.

I'm not talking to you.

Tuxedo One, you still talking to me?

I'm here. Found the controls.

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ I really like to dance to the b*at ♪

Intense. Johnny really likes keeping tabs on his clientele...

But his office is completely empty.

I'm thinking it's time for lights out.

Hey!

Bloody hell. I'm made.

We got a problem. Julia's been grabbed.

I think this is a trap!

The building schematic shows a wall safe.

I'm betting it's in there.

Or it's just sitting on his desk.

Awfully important book to just leave lying around.

Unh!

Kate? Kate, come in! Kate!

Mr. Elliot's cell is 243.

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall.

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put humpty together again, but he was an egg and never should have been sitting on that wall in the first place, and honestly, what were a bunch of horses gonna do?

W-W-When do I get my face?

As soon as I get that journal, and it's not just a face, Tommy.

It's a whole new you.

Oh. What's the deal with the other one?

Mary Poppins says she works for SRR.

Huh. A little out of her zip code.

Talk to our guys across the pond, see if she's worth anything.

Take her in the back, and let's, uh, put the word out to the families we're auctioning off Batwoman to the highest bidder.

Winner gets to cure Gotham of its Bat problem.

You got it, boss.

What do you mean they caught her?

What happened to your member of the special reconnaissance turns out I'm not good backup at all regiment?

I didn't call you down here for a yelp review, Mary.

I need you on the comms monitoring the cameras for me.

What? I'm going in and save Kate and Julia.

Going in as what, Sabatino's accountant?

Look. No offense. This is not gonna get you past the bouncer.

It has to be me. Okay. No offense, but you're insane.

I know Sabatino's cousin.

I pumped her stomach when she O.D.ed.

She owes me one.

She can get me facetime with her cousin.

And then what? Ask him nicely, offer to tag his club on your insta?

You sound like Kate. Because she's right, Mary.

It's too dangerous! Case in point, she was just apprehended.

Well, then what's the Batprotocol here, Luke?

I don't know!

I don't know.

All I do know is that I really wish my dad were here right now because he would know what to do, but he's not because he d*ed protecting that journal, and now Kate and Julia might do the same, and I cannot add you to that list.

Look. I know no one trusts me to pull this off, but I trust you to keep me safe.

Okay. Uh... Okay.

Fine. Then you're gonna need some Bataccessories.

Okay. Don't worry.

They go with everything.

Tomcat, hey, man.

Thanks for giving me the need to know on our uninvited guest, but I got to ask how'd you know Batwoman would be coming for the journal?

Well, I have friends in low places.

Yeah, that I knew. The Bat's been a Thorn in my bottom line for too long.

Can't wait to clip her wings.

Oh. Well, you enjoy that, buddy.

Where's the journal? Yeah. See, here's the thing.

If that book was so important that the Batbaby wanted it, I'm thinking that you undersold me on its value, so I'm gonna hang onto it.

Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, don't be a d*ck.

Tommy, your accounts are frozen, you're on ice.

Can you blame me for giving you the cold shoulder?

Take care of yourself, buddy.

That son of a bitch was like a brother to me!

Clearly, you are an only child.

Otherwise, you would know that our dear siblings are the ones most predisposed to betray us.

Why aren't you more upset, considering you won't be getting the journal you so desperately want?

You should be more careful who you trust.

If you can't trust your money launderer, who can you trust?

Hmm. No one.

I only trust in the fact that people can't be trusted.

So you knew that Johnny was gonna betray me?

No. I just didn't trust him not to.

Well, congratulations, Alice.

You were right, but you still don't have the book.

Hmm.

I have a contingency.

You see, I released a rare bird from her cage here at Arkham, Gotham's most notorious feather-clad Klepto.

The chick who thinks she's a myna bird?

She prefers to be called Magpie.

♪ Dance for me, dance for me, dance for me ♪

♪ Uh-huh, oh ♪ Vodka... Venti.

Woman after my own heart.

Sure that's the best idea?

♪ Move for me, move for me, move for me ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey, and when you're done... ♪ Aria!

Hi.

♪ I said, oh, my God ♪ I'm... not placing you.

Oh. Picture me upside down, holding a bedpan of your puke.

Oh, my God! Mary, hi!

Okay. I'm impressed.

What are you doing here?

Um, I was actually looking for your cousin.

Oh. Cousin Johnny? Mmm.

He's just in a superintense meeting right now.

Oh, I know. With a bunch of his...

Do not say, "crime families".

Mafia bros. Mafia?

Yeah, you're dead.

Or his frat bros or something.

I don't know, but he texted me 911 with a bunch of typos.

Issues with embarrassing nosebleeds from the...

Oh! Say no more.

Let me see what I can do.

♪ The things you do before ♪ Really starting to regret this dress right now.

You're doing awesome.

Sold to Vasily Kosov.

You are the proud owner of Batwoman's very own grappling g*n.

All right. Now on to the final item of the night and, let's face it, the reason you're all here.

I give you the Scarlet Knight herself.

We're gonna start the bidding at $2 million.

2 million. Do I have 2.5?

How about 3 million?

Come on. Do I have 4?

$10 million.

Unh!

So who you supposed to be, the Bat's sidekick?

Ohh.

I'm gonna tell you what I told you 9 punches ago.

I'm not with Batwoman.

I'm with the Special Reconnaissance Regiment.

That's interesting...

Because I just got off the phone with our contact at the SRR.

He says you haven't been under their employ for the past 6 months, something about going rogue and betraying the organization's trust.

Now... let's start fresh...

Shall we?

Who are you really working for?

This is a surprise.

Usually when they say I have a visitor, it's followed by the words

"just kidding" and a lot of laughter at my expense.

You're the one who put yourself in here, Alice, not me.

Technically if we're splitting hairs, Kate shoved me into the cell, and you helped lock the door, but... whatever lets you sleep at night.

Tommy Elliot just hanged himself, or that's what it was meant to look like.

Do you know anything about that?

What do I know?

I know I don't give two hoots about Tommy Elliot!

I know I don't have any motivation to help you, and I know it is impossible for one to heal from the trauma of being locked in a cage when one is still locked in a cage!

How many times did you tell me that Beth was never coming back?

This is me admitting that you were right.

Do you know what they do to patients in here?

They put electrodes on our heads and blast us with so much electricity that we seize.

And I don't know the exact science, but... after about 10 jolts, let me tell you, you start convincing everyone around you that it worked.

I'm sorry that it ended up this way.

If you mean that, then get me out of here.

I can't. I have to protect the daughters that I have left.

The thing they don't tell you about ECT is that once it's over all that's left is clarity.

Ha! I see everything now, how this came to be, how it will end, and I promise you, Daddy, what I have in store for you is so much worse than a cage or electrodes or insanity.

I guess you could say it's...

Worse than being me...

But you'll see.

Who are you?

The heir to Hamilton Dynamics, and I got money to spend.

Look. I don't care about any personal vendetta against Batwoman.

Whether she blew up a shipment of "H" or bataranged your dog, I don't give a feel.

Hamilton Dynamics wants the technology in that suit, and we're willing to pay handsomely for it.

Okay. Well, I don't know how you heard about our little bake sale, but I do know what $10 million looks like, and it won't fit in that briefcase.

It's 2.5. The balance will be wired to whatever account you...

This is an all-cash business, Ms. Hamilton, but you want the suit, it's yours as soon as we peel it off of her dead body.

So I got good news and bad news.

Nope. It's all bad, and it somehow just got worse.

Shiny, shiny.

2.5 million for the suit off of her dead body, and with the highest bid for the privilege of k*lling her, sold to the gentleman with the score to settle with the Bat.

The money I lost from the shipment is nothing compared to what I'll get for you.

People will pay a premium for a piece of...

The Bat.

Luke, now.

Hold still.

Go check it out!

Unh! Ugh.

Please, please. I won't tell anyone about you and SRR.

Aah!

I know.

Unh!

Agh! Ugh! Oof!

Rahhhh!

Aah!

Aah!

Unh!

Okay. So that was awesome.

Also, Magpie's here.

Magpie. Yeah. I don't know, but she has the journal, and Luke says that she's heading to the roof.

I'll get her. You get her out of here.

Seriously?

Early bird gets the worm.

You're a long way from Arkham.

I told you I wasn't a jailbird.

You know what they a about a bird in the hand?

Yeah, I do.

No!

Okay. So which one do you want to hear first...

"thanks for saving my ass" or "sorry for always shutting you out"?

Uh... you pick.

I'm sorry for always keeping you at arm's length, but it's not because I don't trust you or think that you can't handle yourself, which obviously you can.

It's because I've already lost one sister, and the thought of losing you, too, I... I can't, Mary, but thank you for not listening to me and risking your life to save mine.

I guess I just have to get used to the fact that you are... a total badass.

Badass enough to be one of your real estate assistants?

I believe they prefer to be called associates.

Ohh! Oh, okay.

All right. I'll see you in the Batcave.

That is literally the coolest thing anyone has ever said to me.

Okay. Okay. All right. Bye.

Crazy night, huh?

Uh, you could definitely say that.

And apparently Batwoman was here, which is superweird because the last time I saw Batwoman I was with you.

Kind of a crazy coincidence.

Actually, it's not.

I wasn't really at the club sussing out the competition.

Johnny Sabatino stole something from Wayne Enterprises, and I needed it back.

Batwoman helped me.

Think you could, uh, get me her autograph?

Probably not. Heh heh.

But I could give you a ride home.

After tonight, I was heading to get a drink.

Your place still open?

Nope.

Oh... my... God.

Ohh! Oh!

Huh.

Holy crap!

What?

Oh, my God! Oh. Where's...

Whoa, whoa, whoa! No, no! No!

Okay. What?

This. Absolutely no one can know about this place, understand?

Yes.

Kate's life depends on this, Mary. I'm serious.

You can trust me really.

This is the biggest secret you will ever keep in your whole life, okay?

Okay. Look. When Bruce first showed me this place...

Bruce Wayne is Batman?

Um, that's... Ohh!

Okay.

What do you mean it's gone?

I woke up, and Reagan was gone, and... and... and so was the book.

The book filled with secrets my dad d*ed to protect?

I never thought that Reagan would...

I'm sorry, Luke.

Yeah. Sorry doesn't undo the fact that your life is very much in danger again, as in right where we started but worse!

Guys... with everyone in Gotham trying to get their hands on that journal, I think the million-dollar question is what would a bloody bartender want with it?

Hope you know you cost me a really hot girlfriend, Magpie...

Again.

That's what you get for falling for a Mark again.

You know how this works.

We steal from the rich because they'll never miss it.

You aren't supposed to miss them.

You got your book.

You can trade it for your freedom, but I'm out.

I'm done being advance scout for Magpie.

I thought you'd do anything for your sister.

I'm pretty sure I just did.

Hey. Hey.

Since we missed dinner, how about we grab a celebratory brekkie?

With Tommy Elliot not getting his day in court, I'm not sure what there is to celebrate.

Hmm. Think we can think of something.

Oh, I got to get this. Um, I'll catch you up?

Yeah.

I was gonna call you.

Yeah. Yeah.

I understand.

There's been an unforeseen setback.

I don't have my hands on the journal yet, but I assure I will, and then it'll be yours.

Hold still. One wrong move, and my little tracker friend will zap you, and you'll be a dead dodo.

There. Now you're free to fly the coop.

Oh. Good.

I was never meant to be a homing pigeon.

How's my new favorite book?

Have you gotten to the chapter yet that tells us how to k*ll the Bat?

No, because it appears Tommy Elliot neglected to share one very... crucial detail.

Lucius Fox wrote the entire journal in code!

What?

Errr!