03x13 - Like a Snowball Down a Mountain

[bunniefuu]

Previously on "Switched at Birth"...

Daphne: Oh my God.

Monica: The crew that Nacho runs with, they can do a lot more than throw bricks through your window.

I'm moving in.

But...

I'm not gonna let anything happen to you or Daphne.

Hi, I'm Sarah Lazar. I'm a friend of your dad's.

Sarah is writing a book about the switch.

She's writing my story.

(Groans)

What about t*nk?

I depledged the fraternity.

I'm gone. I'm out. It's over.

He depledged as some kind of grand gesture for me.

For now.

(Phone beeps)

Bay's laptop was on the couch.

What came up?

"Where can I buy the morning-after pill?"

Hey.

(Laughs) Hey.

Come in.

(Door closes)

So, uh, how's the moving going?

I should be out by tomorrow night.

There's gonna be a lot of empty walls in my new dorm room.

I was hoping maybe you could loan me one of the paintings in your studio?

t*nk, you're an amazing, incredible guy...

I think you're amazing, too.

... but I think we should go back to being friends.

What?

I just think we were better that way.

Remember how much fun we used to have?

I feel like being in a relationship has... kind of ruined that.

(Sighs)

You're breaking up with me?

(Sighs)

Is it because of that army guy?

Or... or Emmett?

(Laughs)

No.

Come on, you and I... we're so different.

Which is what I thought made us work.

We were fighting all the time.

We only fought about the fraternity.

That's gone now.

It wasn't just about that.

Do you even care that I depledged for you?

Okay, you said you made that decision on your own.

You said you came home and the bathroom was covered in vomit.

Yeah, which I could have handled if you hadn't brainwashed me into thinking this place was evil.

So, now I brainwashed you?

(Scoffs)

You know what? That's fine.

Whatever. I don't even care.

See you around.

(Tape squeaks)

(Door closes)

Bay: It was awful.

He completely lashed out at me, which I understand.

But it was not fun to be on the receiving end of.

After the week we've had, I really just wanna... stay under the radar for a little bit, put all the t*nk and Matthew stuff behind us.

What?

Yeah, like, a thousand texts.

What kind of picture?

Oh, no, you didn't.

You were sexting Matthew?

Oh, it was a tasteful junk sh*t.

I... ( Exhales)

I never thought that I was gonna have to learn the sign for "junk sh*t."

I can not believe you did that!

(Sighs)

Well, we're just gonna have to get the picture back.

And then Matthew won't have anything to hold over you anymore, you can tell Principal Rose the truth about what he did to you.

I don't know, but...

We will figure it out.

(Blender whirring)

Is that your alarm clock?

No, it's breakfast.

Welcome to living with Daphne. (Chuckles)

(Groans)

Mm, don't get too comfortable.

The blender will probably go off any minute.

She doesn't know how loud it is, but it's a small price to pay for a gourmet breakfast.

(Knocking on door)

Oh.

Oh.

Come in. Come in.

Hey.

Breakfast in bed?

Pancakes with a blackberry drizzle and fresh squeezed orange juice.

Mm.

This... this looks... um, how do you say "amazing"?

Amazing.

But if it doesn't taste amazing, this is the sign for "awful."

(All laugh)

Hey, no wait. Where are you going?

Uh, when you were little we couldn't get you to leave.

You would crawl and wedge yourself in between us.

And you insisted on bringing every stuffed animal... the pig, the kitty, oh, and this very ugly dog.

Mr. Chompers.

Yes. Oh.

(Alarm clock rings)

I have to get ready for work.

Bye.

(Door closes)

I really wish she wasn't working for that guy.

Don't worry.

How do you say... don't worry.

I'll go with her and I'll keep an eye on her.

Thanks.

That's my girl.

Who's your girl?

Your mother is going to be on the cover of "Parade" magazine.

Mm-hmm.

Mom, that's awesome.

I'm hoping you're drawing the line at "Maxim."

Yes.

Hey, I have an idea.

So, since Angelo has officially moved in, I thought maybe we could do like a little welcome thingie for him.

It has been awhile since we have broken out the chili cauldron.

Yeah.

We could do that. (Clears throat)

Just got to pick a night.

(Sighs)

Okay.

I should get going. Thank you.

You're welcome.

Here.

So, is everything... okay with you?

Yeah.

Okay, I'm just gonna come right out with it.

We know you took the morning-after pill.

We're not mad.

"We." You told dad?

Uh, well, actually he told me.

How did he find out?

It doesn't matter.

Look, honey, we don't want you to feel awkward or ashamed, but we're concerned.

(Sighs)

Honestly...

I wish you weren't having sex.

But since you are, you and t*nk need to use condoms.

Mom.

I keep a box in the bathroom downstairs here and I don't count.

And if you need help getting the pill, I...

Mom, t*nk and I broke up.

Oh.

I'm so sorry.

(Sighs) Gosh.

How you doing?

I feel really terrible about the whole thing.

Hi.

Hey.

How's it going with the shower kits?

Pretty good.

Almost done.

Wow, that was fast.

(Clears throat) Um...

We don't give out mouthwash.

I'm hoping I misread that.

Did you say no mouthwash?

Yeah, some of the patients, they drink it to get drunk.

Right, 'cause of alcohol.

That's why we keep the bottles behind the desk.

(Sighs)

Well, hopefully it will be easier taking the bottles out than it was putting them in.

You want to know a secret to do it in half the time?

Make your boyfriend do half the work.

You don't have to do that.

Hey, the faster we get it done, the faster we can do something a... a little more fun.

Agreed.

Daphne.

Can I speak with you?

I have good news.

I found some funding.

So starting tomorrow, you are my new assistant.

Thank you.

Hey, you earned it.

You've been a hard worker and extremely helpful to our patients.

I won't let you down, I promise.

Good, because you'll have lot more responsibilities... scheduling, handling the inventory, overseeing the volunteers.

Overseeing the volunteers?

That's right.

But some of them have a lot more experience than I do.

Campbell, for instance.

Is supervising Campbell going to be a problem for you?

No. Not at all.

Okay.

Looking good Kathryn.

Yeah yeah. Flirt with us.

Yes.

Keep it playful. Yes.

Whoo-hoo! Okay.

Maybe you guys, like, bat a little bit.

Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah, that's it. Batters up.

Yes!

All right, Kathryn, Kathryn, more attitude.

Yeah, these guys want you...

(Laughs)

... they can't have you and you know it.

Why don't you be the coach?

You're about to send them off to the showers.

I don't know why you need male models to play baseball players when you got the real deal right here.

Ooh! I think we should get some with Kathryn holding the bat.

Okay.

Yes?

Swing for the fences.

Okay.

Sweetie, you should choke up a little bit on the bat.

I'm sorry, you're making me a little nervous, honey.

Uh, okay then.

I tell you what, I'm gonna go hit the treadmill.

Mm-mmm.

All right guys, you know what, let's take a quick break.

I need to make a few adjustments.

Thanks, guys. How's it going?

Oh, the magazine's gonna love it.

Uh-huh.

But I did just get an email from our legal department...

Uh-huh.

... And they have signed off on everything except for the sports reporter character Tara Mazar.

Oh.

Yeah.

Apparently, there is a female sports reporter named Sarah Lazar.

(Sighs)

She tried to sleep with John when he was with the Royals.

Really?

And she wrote the competing "Switched at Birth" book.

Wow.

Well, apparently she read the excerpts we leaked and she's filing an injunction to stop the book's publication.

Can she do that?

Well, she can try, but don't worry.

Worst case, we push the release date back a bit.

All right, everybody, let's sh**t.

You let the legal department worry about Sarah Lazar.

You just go sh**t me a great cover.

So... what did Dr. J want?

He wanted to tell me that he's hiring me as his assistant.

That's great!

I didn't know there was a job opening.

There wasn't, really.

I was looking for a way to stay on after my hours were up, so I asked.

And I think he sort of created a job for me.

(Laughs)

Here, let's get back to fixing these.

Bay: This might be harder than I thought.

It's not just deleting the photos from his phone, what if Matthew has some kind of online backup?

Matthew has P.E. fourth period...

I pass him every day on my way to history... and he never has his messenger bag with him.

Hmm, great. I'll make sure to brush up on my safecracking skills in study hall.

You know the combination?

Okay, so you get the combination and Matthew goes off to P.E.

We have 50 minutes to get his laptop and phone, delete the photo, and then get everything back to his locker before class is over.

Stand down, Agent Sorento.

It's just Wes. And be nice.

(Bell rings)

Hey, ready to go?

Sure, let me just grab my swatch books.

Where are you going?

Wes and I have a walk-through of the redevelopment.

(Chuckles)

You're going to East Riverside?

Don't worry about it.

She'll be with me the whole time.

Oh, hey.

Before I forget.

Here's the price list for the marble guys.

Is that a g*n?

Yeah.

Have you lost your mind?

Is that thing loaded?

What good would it be if it wasn't?

You just said it was nothing to worry about.

Because I have a g*n. Is this a problem for you?

Hell yeah, it's a problem for me.

Well, have you ever fired one?

No.

Well, there you have it.

Why don't you come to the sh**ting range, I'll show you how to protect yourself.

Absolutely not.

I didn't invite you.

You American cowboy.

Damn right. I'll defend myself if I have to.

Stop it, both of you.

I'll take care of this.

We are trying to de-escalate things in East Riverside.

I don't think bringing a loaded g*n says "we're here to make things better."

No, it says, "we will not be threatened."

(Sighs)

I'll go with you to East Riverside, but that thing stays in the trunk.

Fine. If we run into any trouble, we can fend them off with our intimidating wallpaper sales.

(Bell rings)

(Door closes)

She's not here.

I guess you heard we broke up?

Yeah, sorry to hear about that.

I just...

I need to talk to her.

I just don't understand why she would end things so suddenly.

There's gotta be something I'm missing.

(Sighs)

Do you know something?

I know about Bay having to get emergency contraception.

Mr. Kennish, I swear...

Please don't play dumb with me.

I saw her computer.

She was looking up places to buy the morning-after pill.

I don't know if that's the reason that you broke up, but I do know I do not want her with someone who would put her in that position.

You know, honestly, I expected more from you.

Well, I can promise you it'll never happen again.

(Chuckles)

(Door opens)

(Door closes)

(Alarm chirps)

Sarah.

(Sighs)

You're stalking me at my place of work?

Why are you trying to sabotage my career?

Me? Sabotage you?

You know... (Sighs) my entire career, editors assume that I slept with players to get a story.

And finally, I work hard enough and long enough for them to stop saying that.

And now you and your book...

It's a fictional character.

Right, Kathryn.

So, "Tara Mazar" just came to you in a dream.

You know, I don't know what your obsession is with me.

You're the one who wrote a book about my life.

And the second you found out I was writing a book about my family, you should have dropped yours.

I had already started it and I had a good take on it.

And every word I wrote was the truth.

You wrote about my miscarriage.

It was relevant to the story.

Oh.

And I was trying to make you seem... sympathetic.

I didn't make up lies about you and I will be damned if I sit back while you make them up about me.

Fine.

More publicity for my book.

Shouldn't you be at school?

I don't have a first period.

Uh, someone from the state medical board is coming by for an inspection and I wanted to be here.

Okay.

We don't have a lot of time.

Everyone else is busy, and there is a really long list of things to take care of, stuff like soap dispensers have to be within eight inches of the sink, and that's not even the craziest one.

It's gonna take us hours to bring the supply closet up to code.

Just relax.

I'll relax after we pass the inspection.

I've divided up the check list.

We don't need to bother with half this.

What do you mean?

I mean, the only thing they really check is the drug lock-up, rubber glove usage and medical waste disposal.

How do you know that?

I've been through a few of these inspections.

Well, just 'cause they didn't check last time doesn't mean they won't check this time.

Trust me. Just focus on the really important things.

This is the first assignment Dr. J has given me.

We're gonna do this right.

(Sighs)

Okay.

(Bell rings)

Jackpot.

(Beeps)

What about that one?

Okay. 20 minutes to wipe the computer and then get everything back to his locker.

What?

You don't want me to see it.

(Sighs)

Hey, what is it?

Oh my God.

Where did he get all of these?

I think... he's in love with you.

Think about all the time he put into writing all those texts.

How long he let it go on for.

He thought you two had a real connection.

Not to him.

Well, he must have changed his mind.

What did you say?

(Clicks tongue)

That would do it.

(School bell rings)

Oh, I've got to get this stuff back to his locker now.

(Sighs)

(Sighs)

We deleted the photo.

It's gone.

Us? Expelled? Matthew, just stop.

We know what this is about.

We read your letter.

Matthew, come on.

The letter you wrote to Emmett.

(Phone ringing)

(People chattering)

(No discernible dialog)

(Sighs)

Is everything okay?

No.

The inspector found a sharps waist container mixed in with the regular trash.

Crap.

Waste removal was on your list.

But I checked it.

Clearly, not very well.

Maybe I would have caught it if I wasn't racing around measuring soap dispensers.

I covered for you, so Dr. J thinks I screwed up.

I told you to focus on three things.

The drug lockup...

I was doing my job.

I made a decision.

Yes, you did.

So that's what this is about?

You think I shouldn't have gotten this job?

It should have been somebody that knows how this place runs.

Like you.

Why didn't you tell me you were gonna ask him for a job?

I don't know.

Don't you find it a little cagey going behind my back like that?

I wasn't trying to go behind your back.

Don't you think I'd like a paying job?

Of course. I assumed that you never asked.

Suddenly you ask, and money falls from the sky.

I have no idea where he got the funding.

I just find it a little weird.

Well, maybe you should be asking him why you didn't

get the job and not me.

You know what, you're right.

(Sighs)

Hey.

Can I talk to you?

Okay.

Well, uh, I have this friend and he did this terrible thing to another friend, but then I found out that the first friend has feelings for the second friend and...

You know?

Did you know how he felt about Emmett?

I don't know what to do.

I mean, he did this awful thing to Emmett.

And we could report him, we should report him, but then all this other stuff would come out.

But?

There's, like, five guys who are out at Carlton.

(Sighs)

(Door closes)

Hey.

Am I too late for the man candy?

A day late.

(Sighs)

I got hit by another Sarah Lazar b*mb.

Oh, no. Not her again.

Yeah, she's suing to keep my book from coming out.

On what grounds?

Well, I have this character that's a sports writer who sleeps around to get stories.

Is it based on her?

Yes, but I didn't start those rumors.

But you are repeating them.

I thought you'd be on my side.

I want to be, but as a woman who is being smeared with rumors of sleeping with her boss, I see Sarah's point.

Who's saying that about you?

My cousin Felicia, for one.

The one who's house you redecorated?

For free.

Unbelievable.

You want to knock down a successful woman, call her a slut.

(Cellphone rings)

(Gasps) I got to take this.

Hey, Wes, what's up?

Yeah.

Of course I remembered to order the carpet samples.

Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow.

Bye.

You forgot to order the carpet samples.

Regina: No, um, I stopped off at the store to pick up something for dessert.

Should I get strawberry ice cream or mint chocolate chip?

(Sighs) Okay.

I'll surprise you.

I'll be home in a bit. Bye.

(Sighs)

(Sighs)

Dispatcher: 911, what's your emergency?

Um, I think I'm being followed. There's a man sitting in a car in the parking lot where I work. I think he's waiting for me.

What's your location?

8510 Hopkins Avenue.

I'm sending a patrol car now. Can you give me a description of the person in the vehicle?

Okay.

Ma'am?

Are you there?

Yeah.

Um, it looks like he's gone now.

Are you sure?

I can still send a patrol car.

Uh, no.

It's okay.

I think I'm just being paranoid.

(Sighs) Thanks.

Oh God.

t*nk.

Hey, I missed you in class.

Yeah, I didn't really feel like going.

(Sighs) t*nk.

(Sighs)

We're gonna have to see each other in our class.

And I don't want things to be weird between us.

I know this might not be easy, but I really want us to be friends again.

You know, I stopped by your house with some stupid fantasy of winning you back.

I ran into your dad instead.

I got a lecture about having unprotected sex and forcing his daughter to get the morning-after pill.

Oh God. (Sighs)

Not sure who that little talk was meant for, but it sure as hell wasn't me.

And you might want to clear your browser history next time.

t*nk.

Just so I know, was it the army guy who lied about cheating on you?

Or was it Emmett? Who actually did.

(Scoffs)

I am such an idiot.

I pretty much helped you two get back together, didn't I?

You have every right to be mad at me, and I'm sorry that I lied to you, but...

I just thought that the truth was gonna hurt you even more.

After you found out that Emmett cheated on you, was there anything he could say to make you feel better?

No.

Well, there you go.

Sorry, I didn't know it was on.

No, perfect timing.

I added flashing lights to the system.

I was just about to test it.

Looks like it works.

(Laughs) Yeah.

Is my mom here?

Um, she went to the, um...

(Sighs) store.

Is there anything I can do?

(Breathes deeply)

I just had a really big fight with Campbell.

I thought things were going well.

They were... until Dr. J promoted me and not him.

Oh.

But the thing is, he's been there a lot longer than me.

The doctor hired you, not him.

There must have been a reason for that.

Yeah, I guess.

I'm not, like, embarrassed about being smart or anything.

It's just, being my boyfriend's boss, is that gonna work?

Maybe not.

But then you're gonna have to decide which is more important.

Can't I have both?

(Sighs)

Depends on the guy.

Oh, um, so did you decide on which ice cream?

Oh. (Sighs)

Neither.

By the time I got to the checkout, the place was a madhouse, so I left.

(Sighs) Sorry.

Kathryn: Yikes. (Laughs)

Lydia: Oh, you look amazing.

You know, I had some ideas about the Tara Mazar character.

She's starting to feel a little... I don't know... one-dimensional. I think we're missing an opportunity to make her more human.

But she's the villain.

I know, but I think we could make her, you know, more well-rounded.

Rely less on the bedroom antics.

And if we change the character's name, we could avoid a lawsuit, too.

Oh, I'm not worried about that lawsuit.

Do you know what makes people really want to read a book?

When other people tell them they can't.

Yeah, I know.

I think it's really more about not wanting Tara Mazar to be a cliché.

Well, I love the character as written.

Well, I'd like to try another version.

Nope. Don't change a word.

You know, I got to get to the airport.

Pick your top three, and we'll talk tomorrow.

They look great.

(Sighs)

Hi.

Dad: Hi.

You okay?

t*nk's not the reason that I took the morning-after pill.

It was Emmett.

I thought you were dating t*nk.

So you and Emmett...

Yeah.

I guess I went off on the wrong guy.

(Crying)

Yeah, t*nk's not the bad guy here.

I am.

Dad: No.

You're not a bad person.

You just made a bad choice.

I don't think t*nk's ever going to be able to forgive me.

I totally broke his heart, he is this great guy and I really do care about him but...

I love Emmett.

Sometimes love makes you do stupid things.

(Cries)

Hey, um, I want to get the rest of these installed tonight, okay?

Okay.

It's nice having him around.

Yeah.

(Telephone ringing)

Oh.

Hello.

Man: Regina Vasquez?

Speaking.

Hello?

Hello?

(Clicks, dial tone)

(Beeps)

Who was that?

Wrong number.

Mom.

Seriously, wrong number.

Hey, Jess, where's the geological study?

I can't find it in any of these.

Oh.

You're early.

We're not meeting the engineers for a couple of hours.

Actually, I wanted to talk to you.

Okay.

Regina: So...

You had to get a permit to carry your g*n?

Yep. (Sighs)

And did you take a class to learn how to sh...

Yes.

I know all about g*n safety.

And all of my g*ns have trigger locks on them.

Why?

I would like to take you up on your offer.

I want you to teach me how to sh**t.

I want to talk to you... about Matthew.

I think you should just let the whole thing go.

Turning him in isn't gonna change anything.

It would only humiliate him.

I know.

Emmett, I don't think he's come out to anyone yet.

And I just feel like if we don't...

If you don't handle this just right... it could really scar him.

Look, we've both done things that we regret and you know what it's like to wish there was something, anything you could do to take it back.

Give him a way out.

I know this is hard for you, but I bet it's a lot harder for him.

Hey.

Hey.

I was stressed and I wanted to make a good impression and I probably overdid it.

I'm sorry.

I get it.

We can get past this, right?

(Sighs)

So I... asked Dr. J for a paid job, like you suggested.

And he found me one... across town.

Oh.

Yeah.

This isn't because of me getting promoted?

No, of course not.

Okay.

And being the new guy, I don't know how much free time I'm gonna have to get back over here.

Right.

Yeah.

Well...

I have to do my exit paperwork.

Sure. Yeah.

Absolutely.

♪ Be the light in the cr*ck ♪
♪ be the one that's... ♪

♪ Slow to anger, quick to laugh ♪
♪ be more heart and less att*ck ♪
♪ be more heart and less att*ck. ♪

(Vocalizing)