02X11 - Terror on Cupcake Street

Episode scripts for the TV show, "Victorious". Aired March 2010 - February 2013.*
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Aspiring singer Tori Vega navigates life while attending a performing arts high school called Hollywood Arts.
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02X11 - Terror on Cupcake Street

Post by bunniefuu »

I don't want to argue with you! I just want us to be happy!

What'd she say?

What'd he say?

Huh? I can't hear.

What?!

Okay, okay... take 'em off.

See?

Not so easy to perform a scene when you have a Bucket on your head, is it?

No.

It's difficult.

Yes. Well... class dismissed.

But... We still have more time.

We do? How much?

Fifty-five minutes.

Oh. Oh!

Well, actually, I do have something I need to discuss with some of you.

Tori, Cat, Andre, Robbie, Jade... please stay.

The rest of you may wander the halls.

Enjoy your day. Thanks for coming, I'm here all week.

Tip your nurses and clowns.

Why did you make them leave?

Ah, I dunno.

They never talk.

Yeah, they just sit there and react.

That's right.

You know, that's...

They just don't talk.

So, what do you want with us?

Who like parades?

Antonio banderas.

Hillbillies.

No one.

Oh c'mon. Parades are fun.

One time my brother was in a parade, but he was inappropriate, so the parade people called the police and now he's not allowed to be in parades.

Or be near horses.

Play with the pretty keys.

Kay-kay.

So... you all know about the woman I've been dating.

Felicia?

No, I don't.

Never heard of her.

Well, anyway, she's the creative director of this year's parade parade.

Parade parade?

I've never heard of that.

Exactly.

It's a parade to help raise awareness of parades.

Anyway, I sort of promised Felicia, Yes. So, who would like to...

How 'bout the rest of you?

Would you guys like to build a float and do a little song in the parade?

Hmmm? For sweet daddy Sikowitz?

Nooooo...M- Naaaahhh...

All right.

If you don't want to be on national television where all kinds of Hollywood producers and casting directors will see you...

That's koodly-doo with me.

Wait.

Yes?

This parade's gonna be on national television.

Yep.

Well, if it's gonna be on national...

Gimme my keys back.

Where's my house key?

Uh, unh.

I'll take her to the nurse.

I swallowed it.

We'll see it again.

Trying to think of parade float theme = NOT EASY.

Feeling: Thinkful.

Okay...

Okay...

Parade float. Ideas...

What do we have so far?

Let's see, oh, we have two...

"A tribute to the fruits of Mexico"

and "Need good idea for float".

What was wrong with my idea?

No one wants to see a parade float called
"The ladies of northridge".

Uhhh... well...

Come on, guys, be serious!

You wanna look dumb on national TV?!

Who's gonna be on national TV?!

We're performing in the parade parade.

I'll do it!

Trina...

No seriously, I'll sing, or dance, or I can just stand on the float, like, right in front and just be the pretty girl, I can totally just be the pretty girl.

All right, let's put it to a vote.

All those...

No.

Fine, I don't wanna be in it.

I wouldn't be in it if you guys begged me.

Just lemme be in it.

No.

I don't even wanna be in it.

Your sister just elbowed me in my lung.

I'll get you some ice.

Sit down!

I'm sorry, did someone invite you here?

Beck told me you guys are performing on national TV.

So?

And you think you're doing that without me?!

You stormed outta Sikowitz's class.

I feel that Jade should be included.

Okay fine, whatever. So what's our float gonna be?

Someone should just pick an idea.

Okay, so who's gonna pick?

Well, luckily, I have the new pear pad app called spin-a-m'jig.

Robbie.

Let me just finish inputting our faces...

And now... I stroke this, and the wheel spins randomly until it lands on one of us.

And that person gets to pick what the float's gonna be?

No Cat... that person gets a kidney transplant.

C'mon, let's just do this.

Yeah go.

Okay, here it goes...

I can't remember a time when this wasn't happening.

I think it's almost done.

Oh my God! It stopped on my face!

So... you get to pick what our float's gonna be?

So... so... What's it gonna be, Cat?

A giant cupcake?!

All right.

We don't wanna wear these.

Why don't you guys like your costumes?

Wh..Why?!

They're candy-jammies.

They go perfect with our cupcake theme.

Yeah, they do. I think they're rad-cool.

Yeah. They look adorable.

Y'know she wants us all to wear 'em.

I will pop your head like a zit.

Graphic.

Hiii!

Oooh, your float is looking gigantically delicious.

I know. It's pretty cool, huh?

Indeed.

You gonna finish in time?

Yeah, we're gonna work all night if we have to.

We'll get 'er done.

Excellent.

Felicia will be so exci...

Our gigantic cupcake float is almost finished!

Feeling: Frosted.

And... This cupcake...

...is done.

Yee hoo!

Yay! Cupcake power!

Woooo! Ha ha ha ha ha...

Hey, Cat, Cat, Cat, Cat, Cat, Cat...

Yeah?

You're k*lling me.

Time?

Oh, it's um...

One-twenty a-m.

Okay, then we better get goin' now.

We don't have to check in 'til seven.

This thing only goes like four miles an hour, and the parade is in Pasadena.

If we leave now we'll probably just barely make it.

All right people... in the dessert!

Let's go.

Oh. Here are the keys to the cupcake.

Oh, no, no, no... I can't drive that thing with you kids in it.

I have a semi-suspended driver's license.

Why'd it get suspended?

Well... see, I was driving through Vegas with these people I met at the circus.

And...

We'll let Beck drive.

Circus people?

One woman had an extra finger on her left ha...

Let's not talk about it.

Mm-hmm.

How do I see outta this thing?

Oh, you just look through the periscope... Right here.

This seems dangerous.

Ah, ya big baby.

C'mon, let's get to that parade before the sun comes up!

She had six fingers on one hand?

Yep... she could swim like a torpedo.

Okay, hang on everybody.

Here we go!

Oh.

Ooh.

Yay.

Are we moving?

Yup, we're movin'.

Can't it go any faster?

Sure.

If we were being towed by something that goes faster.

♪The wheels on the cupcake spin around ♪
♪ Spin around, ♪
♪ Spin around... ♪
♪ The wheels on the cupcake spin around... ♪
♪ Doo d'doodly doooooo... ♪
What street are we on?

Yeah, what street?

Let's just say it ain't sesame street.

I love sesame street.

♪ Sunny... ♪

No!

Hey.

Hey what's in that sack?

I don't know.

Well, I swear it just moved.

Owwwwwwwwww!!! Oh.

Really?

Trina?

Thanks for kicking me in the mouth!

Why are you in that sack?!

So I can perform in the parade!

Right. How do...

No one likes you.

Yeah. You're a nuisance.

Hey, whoa.

Oh my God.

Dang.

What was that?

I think we got a flat tire.

This is fantastic.

Wow. Good.

Fun neighborhood.

Yep... we got a flat tire.

Do we have a spare?

We don't even have a trunk.

Hey. Here come some guys. Maybe they can help us.

Hey, fellas!

Yeah.

Maybe they can help us find a...

Back in the cupcake!

Right behind ya! Go, go, go.

Go, go, go, go.

Oh my God.

Open the door!

Go, go, go, go, go.

Do you see anything?

I see a guy on the sidewalk petting a little dog...

Wait, no...

It's a giant rat...

And he's not petting it, he's eating it.

I'm gonna shut this.

What time is it?

Uh. Almost three a-m.

And what time do we have to check in to the parade by?

Seven a-m.

Which means we have to be there in...

Wait, lemme do it over again...

Four hours!

Four hours.

Yeah, hi.

We have a flat tire... could you please send a tow truck?

Great, thank you so much.

We're on the corner of spates and eighty-third.

Yeah, how long do you think it'll take for you to...

Hello?

Hello?

He hung up.

Man, nobody's gonna drive into this neighborhood at night.

Hey, Batman would.

Do you have Batman's phone number?

No.

Then how we gonna call Batman?

We're not.

I know we're not!

All right.

I think there's a twenty-four hour price-co on spates.

I'll jog up there, buy a tire, and be back in thirty minutes.

Uh, you sure you wanna be runnin' through this neighborhood at three A.M.?

The only thing I'm afraid of is fear and the guy who installed my satellite dish.

I know he wanted to hurt me.

I'm running away!

Where is Sikowitz?!? Not liking this situation.

Feeling: Scared.

Man, Sikowitz has been hone for almost an hour.

I'm calling the cops.

Yeah. That's a good idea.

I think you should do that.

Yeah, do that.

No signal.

What happened? I had full bars a few minutes ago.

I never have signal.

You're still on mobile-tech?

I signed a five-year contract!

No bars.

Nothin'.

No bars.

Why can't we get a signal?!

Are you sure?

Yeah, there used to be a cell phone tower right up there.

What kinda sicko steals a cellphone tower?

Oh... oh... thank cheddar.

Officers... I'm so glad to see you...

Yeah.

Where are your pants?

They were taken by hooligans.

They jumped me about a quarter mile back that way.

And, uh?

What are you doin'? Running around this neighborhood in the middle of the night, huh?

Oh.

Well, I was on my way to the parade parade, riding along with a bunch of children in a giant cupcake...

Uh-huh.

...Now next thing I know, one of the cupcake's tires goes pop.

And why are you taking out your handcuffs?

I... I don't understand what's happening...

Why are you arresting me...

There are seven children in a cupcake who need me...

Help!

There's no children in a cupcake.

Yes. They're wearing candy pajamas!

Heeeelp! Help me! Freedom!

How long has Sikowitz been gone?

Way too long.

Okay, we can't just keep sitting here.

Then let's hear a plan.

Well... we have two guys in this cupcake.

I think they should go for help.

Two guys?

You know what I mean?

Uh... I really don't.

C'mon, why don't the two of you quit acting like a couple of daisies and get out there?

If we go out there dressed like this...

We'll get torn apart!

True.

Tori, you go.

What?!

C'mon, let's just do it.

Do it? But...

Okay.

Wait... do you even know which way we should go?

Well, according to pad map, if you head due north for about... no, Andre, don't do it, don't do it, aww...

What did you do?

OH, OKAY, SO YOU DIDN'T STEAL The cell phone tower.

Noooo.

Then how come you had it?

I was comin' home from church... It fell one me.

Oh, it fell on you.

That was...

Okay, it fell on you.

Hey, get back over here.

I didn't do anything...

You asked some questions...

You cut this last?

I can't even lift it.

The thing just fell the thing just fell on the building kinda...

YOU SCARED US!

Where's help?

We didn't get any!

We got jumped by, like, six guys.

And I swear, one of 'em was wearin' Sikowitz's pants!

What's happening?!

It's the dudes that jumped us.

Hooligans!

They're right outside?!

Aw, man! We're gonna die wearin' candy jammies!

What do we do?!

The confetti cannon!

Yes. Yes.

Kay. Cover your ears!

I think it worked.

Hey... where's Tori?

She went to look for you and Andre.

She went out there?

How'd you guys let her go out there all by herself?

Did you try and stop her?!

In a way.

What'd you do?!

I opened the door.

Oh.

Hello.

Um...

My name is Tori...

Honor student...

My name is Kevin.

Wow.

I used to have a hamster named Kevin.

You've probably never had a hamster.

Okay, here's the thing...

See, my friends and I had a flat tire... Back there in this...

Well, it's hard to explain but... um...

We just need some help changing, you know, the tire.

Do you guys know how to change a tire?

Yeah.

We know how to change a tire.

We'll change it real good.

Well, terrific.

...And you wanna make sure these lug nuts are nice and tight.

There we go. Set her down.

Comin' down.

Good as new.

Yay, thank you guys so much.

How sweet are they?

Yeah.

They're sweet all right.

Look at 'em.

Sweet guys. Yeah.

Hey, I wonder where Sikowitz is.

I dunno.

Think we still got time to make it to the parade?

I don't know, Andre.

I have no way to tell time now.

Wait... are you guys going to the parade parade?

Yeah. This is our float.

So you're gonna be in the parade?!

Yeah, we're performing.

Whoa.

Well, we were just gonna watch it on TV.

Not hi-def, though.

Well... do you...

Wanna come to the parade with us?

Could we?

Uhhh... uhhh... ummm...

Okay. Here we go.

♪ The wheels on the cupcake spin around... ♪
♪ Spin around, ♪
♪ Spin around... ♪
♪ The wheels on the cupcake spin around, ♪
♪ Doo d'doodly doooooo... ♪.

Wait! Wait for daddy...

We got a pantsless Caucasian westbound on spates!

Send backup!
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