02x20 - Big Time Break Up

[bunniefuu]

This is so exciting!

I know!

I can't believe you're up for emily In the new chauncy jackson film.

Jo taylor starring in chauncy jackson and the magic gallows.

I've read every book in the series.

Yeah, and every actress in town wants this role.

Ha-ha!

It would awful if they didn't hire you.

[together] carlos.

I mean, to get this close to the role of a lifetime And not get it?

[together] carlos!

Guys, I'm fine if I I don't get the part.

I just want the phone to ring.

[cell phone ringing]

[all scream]

[together] take it! Take it!

Hello? Uh-huh.

I got the part?

[all scream]

It's a three-movie deal?

[together]
yeah!

It's sh**ting in new zealand for three years?

[together]
yeah!

They want me to leave this week?

Oh, yes!

♪ ah, ah, ah-ah, oh ♪

Oh.

♪ make it count, play it straight ♪
♪ don't look back, don't hesitate ♪
♪ when you go big time ♪
♪ what you want, what you feel ♪
♪ never quit and make it real ♪
♪ when you roll big time ♪
♪ oh-oh, oh-oh ♪
♪ hey, hey ♪
♪ listen to your heart now ♪
♪ hey, hey ♪
♪ don't you feel the rush ♪
♪ uh-oh, uh-oh ♪
♪ go and shake it up ♪
♪ whatcha gotta lose ♪
♪ go and make your luck ♪
♪ with the life you choose ♪
♪ if you want it all, lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got so you got to live it big time ♪

Oh. Oh.

Really? Okay, bye.

"really? Really? Really?"

What "really"?

The agent said I can't do the movie If I can't get out of my new town high contract.

But if you do get out of the contract, Then you go to new zealand for three years, And your relationship is [
blows raspberries].

[together]
carlos!

Sit down.

I'll find out more after I talk to my agent.

Good-bye kiss?

I'll meet you in the lobby later, okay?

He's going to need us this week.

He's also going to need my list of girls Who aren't hot enough for me, But are perfect for you.

And hugs. Huh?

She might not be leaving, okay?

Dawgs, here is what you're going to do this week Because I say so!

Learn the lyrics And listen to the demo track for our next song, worldwide.

It's a song about a love torn apart When that special someone moves halfway across the world.

She might not be going!

Okay, next up on the agenda, Carlos, you need to get rid of your helmet.

Ah! What? Why?

Because on photo sh**t, I'm going for hot boy band, Not "hello, I'm odd."

And digitally removing it is not much better.

Clearly.

Now, hand it over.

[screams]

Okay, kelly, you are now on helmet duty all week.

And the rest of you dawgs, Stay over from rocque records for the next three days.

Latin pop sensation selana Is recording her first english album here, And I don't need any of you falling in love with her.

[lively mariachi music]

Too late.

Okay, so we're done here, right?

I gotta go meet jo. Bye.

Hey!

I...

Can't do the movie.

Ugh.

And you wanted that role so bad.

[angelic choral music]

Are you bummed?

No.

I love being on new town high, And I love...

Living here at the palmwoods, And you live here, too.

Well, I made a reservation For a big fancy celebration dinner tonight, And we could still go and un-celebrate.

It's a date.

Good-bye kiss?

Happy dance.

[upbeat country music]

What's the happy dance for?

Jo not getting out of her
new town high contract And not going to new zealand for three years.

Yeah, she's lying.

She can totally get out of her contract.

Come again?

Subsection "c" states that artists, that's jo, May be released from the project
new town high

If offered a major motion picture.

You read her contract?

I read everybody's contract.

Did you know that if your next album goes platinum, You all get alpacas?

Huh.

Then why didn't jo take the job?

Oh, um, let me think.

You.

Why would she lie to me?

Because passing up the role of a lifetime And international superstardom for a boy Puts a lot of pressure on that boy.

I'm the boy, right?

Yep.

Carlos! Where are you?

Not in the balcony.

Carlos, you know I have a black belt, And you do not want me to come up there And take that helmet from you.

Bring it!

Ooh!

Oh!

A bowling ball? Really?

What is it with him and that helmet?

I have two theories.

One, he projected his love of hockey into his helmet, And then fell in love with his helmet.

And, two, he's an idiot.

And jump.

Whoa!

The bowling ball's a result Of me trying to get rid of the helmet.

Wait--you don't like the helmet.

[mouthing]
why?

[upbeat rock music]

Oh--
carlos!

Helmets have holes!

Hey, guys. I'm--

Helmet's sitting there.

Ah--
we're going counterclockwise.

Okay.

Helmet, do you have any threes?

I have my reasons.

This is great.

We'll team up, overpower him, And get rid of the helmet together.

No. I'm done battling that helmet.

[mouthing]

I know you nodded "yes."

Okay, so selana's manager and I have talked, And we have decided that you two Are not allowed to be in love!

You can tell us how to sing, gustavo, But you cannot tell us how to feel.

This feels really good.

Selana, you're only here for three days.

Then selana and I will pack an entire lifetime of love Into three days.

Yes, and then it will be over.

Over. As in, total breakup?

In three days?

No crying?

No "oh, I miss him"?

Are those promise rings?

Hey, we only have three days.

This relationship has got to move fast.

[lively mariachi music]

[katie]
jo stayed here because of you.

[echoing]

She passed up he role of a lifetime.

[echoing]

Katie, are you inside my head Or are you hiding behind the counter?

So what's the plan, big brother?

I got to tell her to do the movie.

You're asking her to pick acting over you.

She wouldn't do that.

So what--I break up with her so she has no excuse to stay?

Err!

She can't perform the role of a lifetime With a broken heart.

Katie, just tell me what to do.

You have to get her to want to break up with you.

And how do I do that?

[romantic accordion music]

♪ ♪

Can I get some service from a woman?

[crickets chirping]

Oh, yeah!

That's the spot. Yep.

Crash!

♪ you're worldwide, worldwide ♪

[censor beep]

♪ girl, I been thinking about you, yes ♪

Now with the censor in place, We can wirelessly send electronic shocks To the helmet.

Then he associates pain with the helmet And not love.

Never wears it again.

♪ worldwide, worldwide ♪

It's not working. Give me it.

[humming intensely]

Okay, you obviously don't have the right touch, So I'm going to try it.

[yawns]

I don't know what's going on.

I mean, technically he should be dead.

It's because it's not working.

[zapping]

It's working!

It's working!

♪ thinkin' about you worldwide ♪

You do know that the metal plate in my head Acts as a countervalence against electrical currents.

You have no idea what that--means.

Ho-ho!

We've got him right where we want him.

♪ I love you, I love you ♪
♪ I love you, you know ♪
♪ I love you, I love you ♪
♪ so don't let me go ♪
♪ I gave you my heart, you gave me your soul ♪
♪ I have looks that k*ll ♪
♪ you sing rock and roll ♪
♪ from two different worlds, but still we stay strong ♪
♪ they say it won't last, but we'll prove them wrong ♪
♪ I love you, I love you ♪
♪ I love you, you know ♪
♪ I love you, I love you ♪
♪ don't leave me, I love you ♪

I cannot believe You guys didn't finish this.

I never seen you like this.

Jo, we're going to be together for a long time, So it's time you got to know The real me.

Fork chop!

[man screams]

Fork chop?

Yeah.

You know, I'm really glad you couldn't get that movie role.

Saved me the effort to tell you you couldn't go.

Do you realize what a total jerk you're being right now?

Do you realize you would have bombed in that role anyway?

Now why don't you put little miss muffet Back on the tuffet

[whispering]
because you're causing a scene.

Fork chop!

[man screams]

They told me this morning That I could get out of my contract And do the movie in new zealand.

But when I saw you in the lobby, I decided to stay.

[sighs]

Look.

You can either sit down and listen to me Or you can go do your movie and break up with me.

Ladies' choice.

I'm going to do the movie.

And break up with you.

What? No good-bye kiss?

Missed me!

I'm going to miss you.

Your bill.

♪ ah, ah, ah-ah, oh ♪

He needs us, Which is why we're suspending all helmet snatching activity To hang out with you.

And I'm texting selana right now.

It's going to be a boys night out.

[together]
whoo! Whoo!

Guys, I'll be fine.

Don't worry about me.

Selana, I'm on my way.

Give me the helmet. Never!

I think some tv might cheer up my big brother.

On the next new town high, Rachel's going on a field trip.

I don't know.

Something tells me I'm never coming back.

Okay, how about a puzzle?

So I was originally worried That you were going to fall for selana And then be crushed when she left, But now I'm worried You're going to elope!

Do you know how liberating it is to be in a relationship That you know is only going to last for three days?

Um, no.

Yames, there you are.

[gasps]

It's our 18-hour anniversary, And you didn't get my flowers?

How could you, yames?

How could you forget such a special occasion?

See, now I don't need to apologize And race out to get her flowers.

'cause guess what.

Our relationship is almost over anyways.

[chuckles]

But I want to because I miss the way she Smooshes our faces together.

[groans]

Here.

Selana, wait!

[sighs]

I'm sorry.

[inhales deeply]

Let's never fight again.

♪ far away you seem ♪

So here's the plan: We lullaby him to sleep, Pull off the black helmete...

Throw it in the dumpster, Never to be seen again.

Move out!

[lullaby music]

[yawns]

♪ ♪

[alarm blaring]

What?

An alarm? Really?

Yep.

And I added a gps so I can find it in any dumpster worldwide.

How can we not b*at carlos In a plastic helmet!

I don't know!

It's cheer-up time, With pb and "j,"
hockey mags, Nachos--
extra cheese--

One smoothie, three violent video games, And mambo the clown.

Hey, 'cause nothing cheers up broken-hearted boys Like balloons.

Nothing.

Wow.

Must have been one special girl, man.

I'm sorry, katie, But there's only one thing That's going to cheer me up right now.

I realized I forgot to do something Last night at the restaurant.

What?

Give you a good-bye kiss.

We're going to leave you two alone.

Give her this.

I'm confused.

So I was I until I realized what you were doing last night.

Getting me to break up with you So I would take the role.

This opportunity only comes once in a lifetime.

Maybe you only come once in a lifetime.

You are going to be amazing.

Hey, it's me.

I'm going to do the movie.

Okay, yeah. Bye.

I leave for new zealand tomorrow.

Well, that only gives us one day left in l.A.

To do whatever you want.

There's so much here I still haven't done.

Well, then.

What do you want to do?

[lively mariachi music]

[music drones]

Honey, where is the milk You said you would pick up on your way to work?

You know, I just didn't get around to it, 'kay?

[glass smashes]

Hey!

I gave you everything, yames!

And now I give you back your ring.

[screams]

The only regret I have Is that I didn't leave you years ago.

By that I mean yesterday.

[gasps]

Good-bye, selana. Good-bye, yames.

They did it.

They had an entire relationship in three days.

Yes, but at what cost?

Selana is more enraged than ever.

♪ ♪

Good luck on your album.

You too.

Yeah, I still don't get the whole face smoosh thing.

Oh, that--that does feel good.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Don't forget your balloon poodle.

Pop!

With deflated leg.

And my btr cd so I can hear you sing all the time.

Oh, and I figured out That you're going to be going to bed when I'm getting up, So that's when we can face talk.

You can tuck me in at night.

We're running late, ms. Taylor.

[engine turns over]

Are we forgetting anything else?

I know I'm not going to forget you.

[horn honks]

[glass breaks]

[screaming]

Carlos, just give us the helmet!

I can't do that.

[all screaming]

Ugh!

[cat screeches]

[chicken clucking]

Carlos, it looks silly during photo sh**t.

And I don't want to see it at the dinner table.

Fine.

Why don't I just not wear it during photo sh**t Or bring it to the dinner table?

Are you kidding me?

Take it.

[fanfare]

Ooh!

Kendall, guess what.

My helmet and I are together. Forever.

Carlos.

Doing okay, buddy?

Yeah, I'm good.

Just feel like we forgot something.

Who cares?

I bet you're never going to forget that good-bye kiss.

No.

[gasps]

You forgot the good-bye kiss?

How could you forget the good-bye kiss?

That's your thing!

I don't know.

She was late, and the horn was honking.

And the balloon poodle's leg popped, and--

Hey, what's going on?

Uh, kendall and jo forgot the good-bye kiss.

How could you forget the good-bye kiss?

That's your thing!

I know!

We have to get to the airport to kiss jo good-bye.

[all shouting]

Go! Go!

Stop.

You need kendall.

[together]
come on! Let's go!

Attention, ladies and gentlemen...

We need to catch her before she passes security!

Security check-in is that way.

Run!

Go! Go! Go!

Sorry!

Go! Go!

[dramatic music]

Hey.

We forgot to good-bye kiss.

I know.

Come on!

You're holding up the line.

Hey, businessman.

Don't make me taze you.

Go ahead, kids. Finish up.

[sweeping orchestral music]

♪ ♪

Heck of a way to break up, huh?

Flight 123 to new zealand is now boarding.

Flight 123.

I gotta go.

I know.

♪ oh ♪
♪ wait a minute ♪
♪ before you tell me anything ♪
♪ how was your day? ♪
♪ 'cause I been missing ♪
♪ you by my side, yeah ♪
♪ it ain't easy ♪
♪ to keep on moving city to city, just get up and go ♪
♪ the show must go on ♪
♪ so I need you to be strong ♪
♪ I, I, I, I ♪
♪ never, never ♪
♪ never as far away as it may seem ♪
♪ no, never ♪
♪ soon we'll be together ♪
♪ we'll pick up right where we left off ♪
♪ paris, london, tokyo ♪
♪ it's just one thing that I gotta do ♪
♪ hello, tuck you in every night on the phone ♪
♪ hello, tuck you in every night ♪
♪ and I can hardly take another good-bye ♪
♪ baby, won't be long ♪
♪ you're the one that I'm waiting on ♪
♪ hello, tuck you in every night on the phone ♪
♪ girl, I'll be thinking about you ♪
♪ worldwide, worldwide, worldwide ♪
♪ girl, I'll be thinking about you ♪
♪ worldwide, worldwide, worldwide ♪
♪ girl, I'll be thinking about you ♪
♪ whoa ♪
♪ wherever the wind blows me ♪
♪ you're still the one and only ♪
♪ girl on my mind ♪
♪ paris, london, tokyo ♪
♪ it's just one thing that I gotta do ♪
♪ hello, tuck you in every night on the phone ♪
♪ girl, I'll be thinking about you ♪
♪ worldwide, worldwide, worldwide ♪
♪ girl, I'll be thinking about you ♪
♪ yes, I may ♪
♪ meet a million pretty girls that know my name ♪
♪ but don't you worry ♪
♪ 'cause you have my heart ♪

[soft orchestral music]