05x05 - Kingdom

[bunniefuu]

Are you drunk?

This ain't the way it's gonna be.

Can he play?

He loves football.

He just doesn't know it yet.

I came here to tell you that the whole thing between you and me...

You know Vince's dad?

He was a drug dealer.

Used to be one of the baddest cats we had in town.

Tell me you're done with the dr*gs.

I will never let that happen again.

Luke, this is Karl Gage from over at T.M.U.

I'd like to sit down with you sometime.

Why don't we bring you over to T.M.U.?

You can look around the campus, meet the coaches.

Hello, Vincent.

I'm the head coach here.

Set, hut, hut.

[Indistinct shouting]

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

I was gonna take it up the gap.

What are the corners playing?

Cover two.

Cover two.

And in cover two, the tight end is open between the safeties.

So what the hell are you doing?

I was gonna take it up the gap.

I don't want you taking it up the gap, 'cause I don't want you running eight yards and getting hit, 'cause I'd like to go to the playoffs this year.

Would you like to come with me?

Yes, sir.

Then don't take it up the gap.

Do it my way, stay in the pocket, make the read, look for the slant.

And if the slant's not there, what do you do?

I dump it off to Luke.

That's right.

That's good, so let's do that.

Line it up.

Hey, you know what way we're gonna do it, don't you?

Your way, coach.

Every time.

My way!

Hut, hut.

There you go.

Way to hang on.

That's nice, because what is that?

What way is that?

Your way.

That's my way.

The right way, coach.

My way is the right way, the good way, the smart way.

It's the path to salvation, gentlemen.

Three-step drop, coach?

Boy's a natural scrambler.

I don't know why you want to put a leash on him.

You're slipping, Karl.

They said they've been watching me since summer league.

They wanted a verbal commitment.

They shouldn't even be talking directly to you.

You're a junior.

I didn't know that.

That guy Karl said come in the room, and when I walked in they were all just sitting there waiting to meet me.

I said, "I thought you wanted Cafferty."

He said, "we do.

We're talking to you right now."

It's a calf, cow.

A what?

Does anyone else know about this?

No.

Well, my mom and my dad.

I guess that's it.

How's that going with your dad?

Found some middle ground.

Good.

Are they gonna be up there for the game?

No, my mom's gotta work, but my dad'll be there.

I'll tell you what, once we all get up there, you, me, and your dad are gonna get together and we're gonna have a little talk, how's that?

Sounds good.

Does Luke know about this?

No, it's his moment.

Didn't want to take it away from him.

Keep it that way.

Everybody have a seat!

Have a seat now! Let's go!

Take a seat!

Sit down!

Let's go!

Sit down!

Thank you, coach.

We're gonna take a little road trip, gentlemen.

[Players cheer]

South King High School is 250 miles south and East of where we are.

It may sound like fun now, but five hours down highway 40, your butts are gonna be screaming.

My butts is strong.

I've been working on my butt crunches.

[Laughter]

Sit down.

Sit down, sit down, sit down.

All right, your newest teammate, Buddy Jr. here, is passing out your full itinerary.

You'll notice there's a lack of down time.

You'll also notice we've carved out study time.

You good?

Yeah, we're good.

Hey, guys.

Hey, good work this week so far.

Let's keep it up, yeah?

All: Yes, sir.

Listen, I hear everything that goes on around here.

There's nothing that misses my ears.

I know who it is doing the talking around here, and I know who's not doing the talking.

I hear talk about last year's forfeit, the season opener.

I don't mind that.

Go ahead and say it.

But I don't want any talk about revenge going on around here, 'cause when you talk about revenge and you're playing football with revenge, you're playing stupid football, and I'm not gonna have it.

Understood?

All: Yes, sir.

Success is not a goal.

It's a by-product.

So we'll put the work in, we'll stick to the game plan, and we will play the way that...

Play Taylor-ball!

[Cheers and applause]

Coach Spivey is gonna be with the defense.

Coach Crowley will be with the offense.

Coach Riggins will be with special teams today.

Understood?

All: Yes, sir.

Thank you.

Get geared up, let's go.

Let's go.

♪ ♪

Busted.

Who's the guy?

I want a name.

I want to sleep.

You need a shower.

Ah, ah, ah, no time for naps.

We have class.

How about you go for me and take some notes, and I owe you one?

Sign in for me at poetry reading tomorrow?

Okay, deal.

And your mom called.

Twice.

I think you need to go to school.

Go.

♪ ♪

[marching band playing, cheering]

You know, it's very controversial, we don't even say it, but hazing is an important ritual.

You know, back in the old days, it used to be shave the whole body, adhesive tape, leave us out in the country naked just to find our way home.

So it's a lot kinder now.

Don't worry, you can handle it, baby.

You can handle it.

They can k*ll you, but they can't eat you, okay?

See you made the roommate list.

I sure did.

I put you with Luke.

No, no, you shoulda put us in the same room.

Baby, please.

But I am glad you got your own room.

Yeah, there ain't no other girls on this team.

You're right.

There's no girls, there's no moms, no aunties, no little brothers, no nothing.

Just you and me.

So after the game, I'm coming by to you know.

Win the game, and we'll see what kinda doors open for you, okay?

Are you trying to motivate me?

'Cause it's working.

It's working, mm-hmm.

[Cheering, band playing]

Hey, coach.

Are we there yet?

[Laughter]

I miss you so much.

Just... just dying to talk to you, but I know you're off getting smart somewhere.

And your dad just went off for an away game, so I'm all by myself with Gracie Belle this weekend, missing you.

Anyway, call me when you can.

Hope you're having a great time.

And I love you so much.

Bye.

Both: Hey.

I'm sorry to interrupt.

That was something, huh?

Yeah, it was.

Pretty awesome.

So it looks like it's a guys' weekend.

So maybe a girls' weekend.

Why shouldn't it be?

So let's go see a movie tomorrow or something.

Oh, you're so sweet.

Golly, I haven't seen a movie in forever.

Well, we should.

Well, I would love to.

I can't 'cause of the baby.

Oh, right, right, right.

Well, what if I brought over some white wine and Chinese?

That would be great.

Yeah, really?

Yeah.

Okay, I'm gonna call you tomorrow.

All right.

Okay, great.

All right, well, have a good night.

Go Lions.

Go Lions.

See you tomorrow.

Have a good one.

Yeah!

Leave it at 60.

Come on, get the b*at going.

♪ My name is Spivey ♪
♪ you know I'm the best ♪
♪ I get all the ladies ♪
♪ and I hit 'em with the flex ♪
♪ I come down and I'm coming through ♪
♪ I'ma shut my mouth, and I'm gonna pass it to you ♪

All: Go, Luke! Go, Luke!

♪ I like country but this is rap ♪
♪ you put 'em together it is♪
♪ you better look out 'cause I'm Luke Cafferty ♪
♪ if I start rappin' y'all might laugh at me ♪

All: Go, Tink! Go, Tink!

Go, Tink!

♪ Taylor and Riggins and coach and Spivey ♪
♪ coach is on your ass so you better look lively ♪

[cheering]

Hold on, keep it going.

Come on.

Look, Billy, let's just call AAA.

It'll probably save us time by the time you get done there.

Coach, we're not calling AAA.

AAA for women, all right?

We're men.

We don't ask for directions, and we fix our own cars.

Don't worry, I got this.

Ahh!

Son of a...

I'm kidding, I got this.

Don't worry about it.

It's good.

That's funny.

So what's a baptist like yourself gonna do at a methodist university?

Play football.

They got you at running back or on "d"?

I don't know, they didn't say.

I'm gonna ask Karl.

He's coming to our game tomorrow night.

You mind if I take a look at the pamphlet?

No, go for it.

Cool.

I mean, didn't I tell you that when we first started?

Didn't I tell you, I said...

Is that your dad out there?

Yeah.

He's one of those "I'll tell you something" types, huh?

Yeah.

He's a chatterbox.

You a virgin?

No.

I mean, what's the wait?

I said that I wasn't.

Ah, it'll be fine when it happens.

It's all right.

♪ ♪

"Soul-detonating joy bubble of a montage.

"Doormats rising up.

Busting down the front door."

Hey, how do you feel about Sopapillas?

Sopa what?

Fry bread.

Actually, not just any fry bread.

Possibly the greatest fry bread in the history of fry bread.

Come on, hop in the car with me.

Let's drive the 90 miles it takes to get to curvy Irma's unbearably brown fry bread shack.

You won't regret it.

"Running, splashing, "chicken fighting.

The mother gathers her kids..."

Meet you in the car in five.

See you in the parking lot.

"...As fast as she can.

Now these are the facts."

Why don't you do that thing you do?

[Blows whistle loudly]

[Players screaming]

I'm up.

I'm up, mama.

[Overlapping shouting]

I love doing that.

You're welcome.

What the hell was that?

What is wrong with you?

♪ ♪

"Loins," what?

Come on!

What is that?

What?

"Loins," what is that supposed to mean?

♪ ♪

All right, let's go.

[Shouting indistinctly]

I'm Randy if you need something.

Nice to meet you, Randy.

Pleasure.

The sign outside says "loins."

You want to take a look at that, huh?

I'm gonna look into that.

What are these?

Your block of room keys.

If you could just stay in your block.

You don't have regular keys, do you?

Those are our regular keys, sir.

You don't have the regular ones you put in a lock and...

They don't make those anymore in hotels.

What's that?

It's a macadamia, white macadamia.

It's complimentary from the...

Macadamia?

Yes, sir.

You don't have chocolate chip, do you?

Enjoy that.

No, we don't.

I just was, um...

Can you keep an eye on your crew out there?

Do me a favor and change that sign though.

I'm gonna do it right away, sir.

Thank you very much.

Hey, remember, helmets and shorts, on the bus in 15 minutes, let's go.

Come on, Buddy Jr. come on.

Tell the front desk we need more towels.

Where's my bag?

Where's my bag?

You guys are gonna be impressed, I promise.

Hey, coach.

Coach, hey.

This is my dad.

Coach Taylor, right?

Yes, sir.

Yeah, Ornette Howard.

Pleasure to meet you.

I've heard a lot about you.

Oh, hey, I wanted to meet the man, you know?

Appreciate that.

I'm just here to see the game.

I don't wanna mess up anything.

No, you're not messing up anything.

Haven't messed up anything.

Yeah, this is coach Riggins and coach Spivey, coach Crowley, and that's coach Stan.

Nice to meet you, Mr. Howard.

Hey.

All right.

All right?

Can anybody tell me what special teams is all about?

Protecting field position?

No.

Team unity.

Special teams is about the real players taking a breather and the people in the stands getting a chance to drop their kids off at the pool.

Special teams.

[Scoffs]

More like special ed.

All right, kickoff team, let's line it up.

From now on, filler time is Billy time.

When we punt, we will down the ball inside the five.

When we kick off, we will not let the other team return the ball past our 20 yard line.

We will run with hate in our hearts.

You'll forget all your hippy, zen, buddhist, happiness, peace, love, bull crap, and you will run with hate in your heart.

You don't leave your lane until you see the zits on that ball-carrier's face.

Do you hear me?

Yes, sir.

Do you hear me?

Yes, sir.

That's what I'm talking about, Buddy Jr.

You will not get the girl.

You will not be written about in the paper.

You will be lucky if your own parents remember your name.

You don't like it?

Good!

Get pissed.

Put my face on every South Kinger that you tackle.

But know this, gentlemen.

Tomorrow night, I will be given satisfaction.

Is that understood?

All: Yes, sir.

Is that understood?

All: Yes, sir.

Coach!

Yes, sir?

This is supposed to be a walk-through.

My bad.

We're done!

♪ ♪

East side!

All: [Chanting]

East side! East side!

Tink! Tink! Tink!

[Chanting continues]

[Cheering]

♪ ♪

East side! East side! East side! East side!

[Chanting continues]

You know, my boy, he got one year left of school.

So why they coming after him now?

Southern Cal just recruited a 13-year-old.

Come on, man, 13?

13 years old.

Yeah, they're looking for the verbals.

That's why I'm suggesting if you feel comfortable with me and you have your trust in me, things come through myself, and that way we have more control over the situation.

Hmm.

Let me ask you something.

Do you think he can play d-1?

T.M.U. is the first one.

It's not gonna be the last.

He used to coach at T.M.U.

Really?

I did.

I was a quarterback coach for a short stint.

Didn't last long.

All right, so...

So everything's gonna go through coach.

Works for Vince, it works for me.

All right then.

We all agree then, anything happens, anyone comes to you talking about anything, I don't care what it is, you come to me first.

It goes through me first.

You got it.

Yes, sir.

All right.

All right then.

Appreciate talking to you.

You betcha.

All right, appreciate it.

All right.

Uh-huh.

It's good, right?

I will have to admit, it's pretty darn good.

It's great.

I'll let you in on a great secret.

I don't take many people here.

Really?

So how'd you find this place?

I got lost one night.

Yeah, I just got lost.

I, um, took a left, I took a right, ended up here.

I'm good at getting lost.

I've kind of made it an art form.

Nice, so did you just get lost today, and make a left and right, and found me at the poetry reading?

Maybe there's an invisible hand guiding me to all things great and good.

Fry bread.

You.

[Cell phone rings]

[Whisper] Not now.

You know what, I'm going back for round two, and then I got to get home.

Thesis calls.

You want seconds?

Do it.

All right.

Two per room.

Everybody...

In the room, Fat Albert!

Come on, let's go.

Oh.

Everybody, hey, two per room.

Who's smoking in here?

[Laughter] Really?

You gonna be the bitch?

Take that chair back, go.

Buddy, get that cleaned up.

Two per room.

'Sup, Buddy?

What's up, man?

Taking in the beautiful view?

It's not much better on the other side.

At least it's quiet.

It's not that quiet.

It's not ranch quiet, but...

It's too damn quiet.

I miss my cop cars and crackheads.

What's up, Twinker?

What's going on, Cafferty?

What's the matter, you can't sleep?

No.

You nervous?

Not really.

I'm just not used to hotels.

Yeah, Tink's a mama's boy.

You would be too if your mom could cook like mine.

Ah, you're right, your mama can cook, but she needs to feed you more vegetables, all right?

And okra cooked in ham juice don't count.

Oh, that's the best.

I thought you were gonna lay off on the pork, man, after I gave you my pig, come on.

Dude, pork and pig is two different things.

Wait, what?

Pork is on a plate, and pig ain't.

All right.

There's a lot of dude talk going on out here.

Ruckle, that's what got you outta bed?

No.

Buddy Jr., he's a really loud snorer.

Like a lactose-intolerant ass face or something.

[Laughter]

What are you doing?

We're just taking in the beauty of Kingdom, Texas, sir.

The beauty?

You mean no bars and 9,000 churches, that kinda beauty?

Sounds like you've been here before.

Yeah, my dad's worked on a few rigs.

We never stayed here that long, but...

As usual.

So Vince, think we're gonna win that game tomorrow?

Yeah, we got b*at pretty bad, but we're not the same team.

That's true.

I heard you guys forfeited.

What's up with that?

It was a bad feeling.

But coach Taylor, he's a, you know, he's a straight-up guy.

He had his reasons.

Just don't know what they are.

Dude, I can tell you...

I can tell you the reasons, 'cause y'all didn't have me on the team, so...

[Chuckles] Okay.

Yeah, well, maybe I can contribute a little something too now.

Well, you had me.

I guess that didn't help.

[Laughs]

But I tell you what, you know what I could get used to?

What?

The free candy at the minibar.

And the two pillows that I got.

Hey, that candy's not free.

[Laughs]

It's not?

No. And that p*rn ain't either.

p*rn is not free?

No, in fact it's pretty expensive.

Are you sure?

Uh, yeah.

All right, 'cause my roommate's in there having, like, a film festival.

So let me go tell him to stop, all right?

All right, word.

Hey, dude, stop being mean.

Come on, now.

This is crazy, man.

Yeah.

Good night.

All right, I'm out.

You are?

Yeah.

Hey, tomorrow, Buddy.

Tomorrow.

All right.

Tomorrow.

Late in the second half, the Lions down by three, and they are getting no respect from these Kingdom rangers.

Tempers are running hot.

And this game has been filled with trash talking and unnecessary penalties.

Rangers with the ball.

First and goal on the Lion's nine.

Gives to rich Roberts up the middle.

Here we go!

Stacked up for maybe a gain of three.

Oh, and a late hit on Luke Cafferty!

Q.B. Andy "Spank, Spank" Miller on a sneak, and he gets in easy.

It's been a slogger of a first half, folks.

Neither team's offense is setting the world on fire, but south king's just grabbed some big mo before the half.

17-7 for the home team, kicking off.

Kickoff return, let's go!

[Cheering]

All right, let's go, boys!

Let's go, B.J.! You get 'em, baby!

Chill out, dad.

Here's the kick.

A squib down the middle.

Number 42, Buddy Garrity Jr., needs to just fall on this one.

Get on the ball! Get on the ball!

Pick it up! Run with it, baby!

Run with it! Run with it! Yeah!

Fall on it!

Fall on it!

Oh, and Junior absolutely laid out by a vicious hit.

And coach Eric Taylor is beside himself, and I don't blame him.

Not cool.

Mess with 42 again...

That's my boy.

Don't tag him, don't tag him, or I'll tag you back!

Clean hit.

You're calling that a clean hit?

What rule book are you playing from tonight?

Sure does seem like these refs aren't calling it both ways tonight, folks.

Take a knee.

We're on the 40.

I can...

Take a knee.

Still two seconds on the clock.

Let's see what Taylor will do now.

[Whistle blows]

New year, same team!

Buncha doormats!

Yeah, I'm talking to you, Howard!

You're in Kingdom now, baby!

Take that knee like I know you can!

Come on!

Hut, hut.

[Whistle blows]

Let's go, let's take it in.

And that'll do it, 17-7, Kingdom at the half, in a game these referees need to get under control fast.

Let's go, come on now.

I'm gonna rip somebody's head off.

They want to play dirty, we're gonna show 'em dirty.

They're out there chop blocking.

I got horse-collared by 56.

All right, we're getting a little home cooked out there, but we gotta rise above that, guys.

Something's gotta change, all this in the pocket, one step, two step ain't working.

Listen to me.

This is exactly what I meant about playing with revenge.

That team out there is not a better team.

They are not a better team.

You take away the mental mistakes, and we are back in this thing.

Otherwise, they are gonna keep playing us for a bunch of fools.

Stay away from dumb, gentlemen.

Coaches, break them in groups, I want to talk to you.

Offense, over here, let's go!

Crowd chanting: Forfeit! Forfeit!

Are you boys ready to forfeit?

If we win, can I have your number?

You gotta win first.

You got it.

[Chanting continues]

What's up, brother man?

I see you decided to join us for the second half, huh?

You sure you don't want to go back to Africa?

No, we here.

You a long way from home.

I'm gonna be on your ass all game.

Yeah, yeah, be right here with it.

Be right here with it.

Yeah, be right here with it.

Let's go, come on.

We'll see, we'll see.

We here.

[Cheering]

Hey, don't worry, I got him.

I got the kicker.

The kicker's gonna get his ass fried up.

Chant of "forfeit" drowning out the whistle as South King kicker Dedman Hollis kicks us into the second half.

What the hell's he doing out there?

And this is strange, Howard taking the field on a special teams.

Maybe he wants to send a message.

Here he comes, and it is a beauty.

♪ ♪

Gracious me, Vince Howard with a clean lick on number 23.

That's my boy!

Off we go again, folks.

Flags flying, pushing and shoving.

One more sh*t by 5, he is gone.

That was a clean hit.

What are you talking about?

I watched that! I saw it!

It was a clean hit.

One more, he's out of here.

Billy, you are blind tonight!

You gotta be kidding me!

You are full of crap!

[Cheering]

Karl Gage, I work for T.M.U.

I'm a recruiter.

And coach Taylor getting more and more upset with the officiating here.

Huddle up!

Listen up, we are not gonna win playing by the rules, do you understand what I'm saying?

So we're gonna play by our rules.

Our rules?

Do you understand what I'm saying?

I understand.

You understand?

Yes, sir.

Well, go share that.

Yes, sir.

Let's go, 5.

Go now!

You saw that hit, though.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Listen in, I don't wanna be touched, all right?

I don't wanna be breathed on.

We're gonna go slot left 91.

They wanna take it to the streets, they wanna play dirty, we're gonna show them how we get down on the East side.

All right?

On one!

Ready?

All: Break!

♪ ♪

Hut, hut.

♪ ♪

Looks like the Lions are finding some rhythm for the first time here in Kingdom.

There's some soft spots in that South King zone, and Howard's finding all of them, folks.

Yeah, man.

We gonna come back on 'em.

We gonna come back on 'em.

♪ ♪

And there's another Kumbaya sing-along for South King sidelines.

Offsetting penalties, and a big stop by the Lions secondary.

♪ ♪

Luke Cafferty with the catch, running for daylight.

Some vicious downfield blocking as he takes it in for the touchdown.

East Dillon making a statement here, folks.

♪ ♪

Thou shalt not lead into mine roommate, 42, anymore, baby!

A little swagger creeping into them red jerseys, folks.

[Whistle blows]

♪ ♪

[cheers and applause]

Easy Dillon has taken control of this game.

And the rangers, on their heels.

Vince Howard and the Lions feeling their oats here, folks.

♪ ♪

Don't fly white cotton in front of a Lion.

He don't like it.

38-17, East Dillon.

Kingdom come, Kingdom conquered.

[Cheering]

A big win to stay undefeated for these Lions.

But more importantly, the team stood up and said, "we will not be disrespected, not tonight."

I wonder how he explains this one.

[Overlapping talking]

Coach, 24 total penalties for 245 yards.

Now, that's got to be a league record.

There were penalties on both sides.

Yeah, but most of them were for unsportsmanlike conduct, and most of them were on your team.

They started this whole mess.

You guys just finished it, right?

Is that the style you're gonna play this year, thug ball?

[Laughing] You know what? It's always good talking to you two.

Hey, hold on, hold on.

Come on, coach.

We got a long bus ride.

We'll see you.

Why are you guys so undisciplined, coach?

[Cheering and chanting]

[Cheering, excited chatter]

Are you in charge?

I'm glad you won your soccer game, but I need you to tone it down.

I can't accept this.

I need y'all to please...

Hi, hi. It's okay.

Go on through, thanks.

If you could get into your rooms though, that'd be great, and just keep the celebration down.

Thank you.

Sorry about that...

[overlapping chatter]

Thank you so much.

Just dial zero.

Okay.

Zero.

[Wild cheering]

Give me a kiss.

Good game.

Thank you.

Also like to see you on private time.

You had such a good game.

[Knocking at door]

Hmm?

Don't even look over there.

What?

Y'all get away.

Stop being nosy.

What... what are they doing?

Get away from the...

They're just a little early, that's all.

Early?

Yeah.

They think we were gonna go out and...

I thought we were supposed to hang out.

We were.

We are gonna go.

But they...

Look at 'em.

They need their quarterback.

And it's only gonna be for an hour or two, I promise.

I'm coming right back.

Okay?

Mm-hmm.

Give me a kiss.

Mm.

All right, just... can you just not lock this?

Just leave it unlocked.

I'll be back in just an hour or two, okay?

Baby, I'm...

Mm, yeah.

So are we just gonna drive around all night or are you actually gonna take me somewhere?

I'm showing you how to get lost.

Well, you seem to be succeeding.

I'm not gonna be able to stay out much longer.

I gotta get home and work on my thesis.

So what are you doing at Burleson?

What are you doing at Burleson?

That's not fair.

I asked you first.

All right, same time.

One, two, three.

I'm here because no Ivy League school...

I'm at Burleson because I couldn't hack it...

Wanted to give me a sh*t, and Burleson offered my wife an adjunct professorship, and they wanted her so bad that they allowed me into the doctoral program...

And I guess it's far enough away from Matt.

Even though I had a ridiculous thesis.

[Chuckles]

[Sighs]

Her name's Alison.

She's very smart and very good at what she does.

We like each other, but we don't love each other.

Maybe it's the other way around, I don't know.

Who's Matt?

He's, uh...

Just this guy in Chicago.

Okay, quit getting grease on the cards.

You keep saying that.

There's no grease on the cards.

Everybody, hey, seriously, I just wanted to say real quick, hell of a freakin' game tonight.

Coach, congratulations.

Congratulations to everybody.

Old-school football.

We b*at the piss outta them, and I loved every minute of it.

And I liked the revenge sticks.

There were some good sticks.

There were.

We let that game get away from us.

What?

What do you mean?

Game got away from us a little bit.

That's how it should be played, coach.

No, I didn't like all that.

I didn't like all that.

No, no, coach, they were late-hitting us the whole entire time in the first half.

I understand that, I'm just saying it got away a little bit.

They were playing dirty.

See y'all in the morning.

[Overlapping talking]

Are you in?

[All talking]

TC, you come back.

We need some more of your money.

I gave it to Stan.

Your G-string's sticking out.

It was an amazing game, dude.

That was amazing.

I coulda frickin' d*ed out on that field.

I was so happy, I coulda d*ed and been happy.

[Indistinct chatter]

You boys legal?

Hey.

Listen up, listen up.

Chill, all right?

We're here.

Hastings.

I know you're into that.

Yeah, you gotta be kidding me.

No, we're here.

This is it.

♪ ♪

Big Owney!

Ruckle!

Look at you, man.

Your daddy called.

Says you's back in town playing football.

What's up with hoops?

Oh, I got converted.

[Girls laughing]

♪ ♪

Don't be looking too much.

Huh?

Eyes back in your head.

And how 'bout some drinks?

Let's do this again.

Let me have all your money.

I don't care for all that celebrating and all that crap.

And I don't like that damn dance that Tinker does out there.

I think it's foolish.

I know, but the boys were having fun tonight.

They were having a good time.

And, coach, we won!

I understand that.

I was there, remember?

Yeah.

Well, how 'bout you guys?

Did y'all have fun tonight?

A lot of fun.

I had fun.

You're starting to get pissy is what you're doing.

I'm not being pissy.

Everybody had fun.

What's wrong with you?

I had fun.

There's nothing wrong with me.

Hey, my son played football tonight, and he got his ass kicked all around the sun and back.

No, no, no, he's gonna be fine.

He was awful, Billy.

He's gonna be fine.

I'm tired, and I'm going to bed.

Just wait, wait, wait, let me say one thing.

Well, say it, say it.

For God sakes, just say it.

Here we are, friends, sitting around here having fun, playing cards, good whiskey, and you've been nursing that drink all night.

You haven't been having any fun.

I've been having plenty of fun.

It'd be a lot more fun if I could b*at this guy.

He's taking all my money.

Hell, I've been cheating all night, looking at his cards and everything else, I still can't b*at him.

Cheatin'?

I'm going to bed.

Good night.

I love you very much, coach.

Show me the money.

Hey.

Um, I really like the way that you're putting your lipstick on.

It's like you're from a commercial.

♪ ♪

Mm, okay.

T.M.U., they didn't want me to say anything.

And coach, he didn't want me to say anything either.

I just felt bad, so...

Why wouldn't coach want you to say anything?

If they want both of us, that's great.

Yeah, that's what I thought.

That's like right now.

Just like tonight, man, you and me together, who's gonna stop us?

That's what I'm talking about.

Who's stopping that?

Dude, we threw up 38 on those punks.

38.

All the way to state, man.

Yeah, Buddy.

All the way to state.

Cheers it out.

Let's do this.

All right.

Good game.

Love begets love.

[Both chuckle]

Well, that's the thing, you know?

That's the thing with having these kids, it's just such a sense of loss, you know?

You know, she's my girl.

We've been... you know, you raise somebody till they're 18 years old, and then they're suddenly just gone.

Mm-hmm.

And she's just been my life for so long, and it's just emptiness.

[Phone rings]

I don't know.

It's strange.

Hey, hon.

We won.

[Gasp] Y'all did.

That's such great news.

Honey, I'm so proud of you.

I'm so proud of you.

I've been drinking.

I'm sitting here with Laurel.

We have been drinking.

Honey.

[Chuckles]

So...

[Clears throat]

So what are y'all wearing?

Gonna go now.

Hey, do me a favor.

Give Gracie a hug and kiss for me.

Oh, honey, I love you so much.

I love you.

I love you too.

I'll see you tomorrow.

All right.

Listen to me, listen to me, listen to me, listen to me.

Look, look.

Look at that man.

Look at that man.

That man called me his brother just now.

I did.

And last year, he punched me in my face.

He didn't just punch you.

He knocked you out.

And your face looked like...

Whoo!

Your face...

You know, that's how you fell when he hit you.

And Tinker, don't go crying on me now.

You traded... you traded Maribelle, my pig, for Becky, my girl.

And I love you for that.

It's a great pig.

Hastings, I bet he could be my brother too, 'cause his hair is like, "bah, bah, bah, poof!"

And then, like...

[Laughter]

And Buddy Jr., where are you, girl?

Buddy Jr.?

Buddy?

That man... Don't look at me.

Look at her.

You are not gay.

That man is sucking face with someone's mom.

You do it.

He could be my brother too.

And I will do anything for you.

Like what?

I will walk...

I will walk on fire for you guys.

That's love.

Really?

You'd walk on fire?

Mm-hmm.

All right, prove it.

What?

Hmm?

Yeah.

[Yawns]

Is one of you Julie Taylor?

Excuse me?

I'm looking for Julie Taylor.

Is she here?

I'm Julie.

Who are you?

Oh, my God, what the hell?

What the hell is wrong with you?

I'm Alison!

Derek's my husband.

Look, you need to work issues out with...

No, no, no, no, no.

You're not special.

You're not the first.

What you are is a frickin' cliche and a slut.

You stay away from him.

Do you hear me?

You stay away from him!

Julie Taylor is a slut!

She is sleeping with Derek Bishop, T.A. of the History Department and my husband!

Julie Taylor is a slut!

Julie Taylor is a slut!

Yeah.

[Muffled talking]

We all do it, ok?

Okay?

I just joined the team.

No, all of us, Buddy Jr., all right?

Okay, all right.

Do it, brother.

Do it, do it.

You're pinching me, biyatch.

[Screams]

[Groans]

Doesn't look that fun actually.

All right, who's next?

You, Q.B.

You do it, man.

That's the badge of our pride.

It's, like, pride, and, like, pride.

You know, like...

That's right.

Idiots.

Feels so nice on my cortex every time you say that.

Do you have to be so rough?

Stop moving.

If you wouldn't move, I wouldn't be so rough.

And she probably wouldn't yell.

So much fun for me, you know?

Wait up, watch the sunrise until 5:00 in the morning.

Jess.

I am sorry.

I will do whatever it takes to make it up to you.

'Cause I love you so much.

Get that all cleaned up?

She's standing up.

I know.

I see that.

[Surprised gasp, whisper]

Daddy's home.

Hey, honey.

[Gasps]

Hey.

Come here!

Hi!

How are you?

I don't believe it!

Hey, how are you?

I'm good.

Good, good.

Welcome to your home.

Hi, Gracie.

What are you doing here?

Gotta do some laundry.

Hi! Hi!

Hi, Gracie.

Good job, son.

Here.

Dad, I got it.

All right.

All right.

Good boy.

I'll see you later.

Ah.

All right, be safe, okay?

Later, bro.

I'll see you back at home.

All right.

Proud of you.

Thank you.

Take care.

Hey.

If you wanna ride home with him, you can.

It's all right.

Coach, this is my team.

I ride with the team.

Mm.

All right, is that it?

Got everyone?

We're good, coach.

Damn, who's that?

Whoa, wait!

Wait!

Wait, coach!

Coach!

Wanna join us?

Buddy Jr.!

[Cheers and applause]

How 'bout that second coming?

♪ ♪

Hey, coach.

Are we there yet?

Nope.

But we're getting there.

Slowly but surely, we're getting there.