03x13 - Virtual Love

[bunniefuu]

What are you doing back? We can't go over this again.

Go home. Get some sleep.

Ugh!

[ gasping, gurgling ]

[ door opens, clattering ]

[ door closes ]

It is so weird watching your mother try to rebound.

Well, taking care of her appearance is a good sign, actually.

She's flirting with everything that moves.

Did she tell you why Cavanaugh broke it off?

No.

I wish she'd talk about it.

Do you know the average woman ingests 7 pounds of lipstick over a lifetime?

Why do you insist on telling me your disgusting fun facts over food?

It's coffee.

Hiya, doll!

Hi!

[ groans ]

Hallo Detective.

Of all the knuckleheads she's gonna flirt with ... she has to flirt with Lightning McQueen?

I thought his name was Detective Gibson.

I believe he's part of the auto-theft task force.

That explains why he's so arrogant.

Watch this. Watch.

Gibson: If you were a car, you'd be a '68 Dodge Charger ... sleek styling, great street performance.

[ chuckles ]

Hey, Detective. I was, uh, I was just telling your mother about this, uh, '68 Dodge Charger we recovered.

Really?

I thought you were about to compliment her on her trunk space.

[ chuckles nervously ]

Jane!

Good morning, Lieutenant.

What's good about it?

Angela: So... Rich, I guess you'll have your usual.

Angela, how can you know me so well?

[ Angela chuckles ]

[ chuckles mockingly ]

[ mimics gagging ]

Now she's trying to make Cavanaugh jealous?

Jealousy can sometimes be a sign of love or commitment.

It can also be a sign that Lightning McQueen is about to get his ass kicked.

So, I'll be seeing you, beautiful.

Okay. Bye, Rich.

I will call you.

Okay.

Hey, Mrs. Rizzoli, if you're not too busy, can I get some coffee over here?

Right away, Lieutenant.

I can't watch any more.

We have to do something.

What? Hide all the plastic knives?

Vanilla.

[ singsong voice ]

Just who I was looking for.

I thought you wanted some coffee.

Uh, never mind.

[ sighs ]

Angela: Hello, Mr. Rondo. Who do we have here?

Reuben, Dania, Trevor.

It's Dawg.

[ barks ]

Oh. How do you do, Dawg?

Rondo, aren't we a little old for playdates?

These are all my homies from "off the street."

Oh. The home for teenagers?

I volunteer there.

We're "Rondo's rejects."

Mm-hmm.

Um...

Perhaps you'd consider a less pejorative name.

Juveniles often identify with the labels society gives them.

Oh, society didn't name them. They named their own selves.

Hmm.

Um, a reject is a person or thing dismissed as failing to meet standards ...

Maura.

"Pejorative" is a word that expresses contempt or disapproval.

Brought 'em by to meet my heroes... a little impromptu "career day."

Wow. So you guys want to be cops?

[ scoffs ]

No. No way.

They just need a little mentoring.

Maybe you could... take 'em around a little?

I-I could be a mentor, too. Does anybody like cooking?

Cooking!

Or science?

Science!

Okay, Ma, why don't you give them a doughnut, and we'll let you be on your way?

Fine by me.

Right? I ain't being mentored by no chick, anyway.

[ laughs ]

You know, now that I think about it, we love to mentor here.

And we can find a boy Detective, if that's what you'd prefer.

Detective Frost could be your mentor.

And Sergeant Korsak could be your mentor.

Dania: If I have to have a mentor, I'd rather it be someone with an advanced degree.

I have an M.D.

Okay, I guess.

You got anything to eat?

[ cellphones vibrate, beep ]

Okay, Ma, we got to go. We got a case.

All right, come on. I'll make you all breakfast.

Frankie! Come here!

I need you to do something.

You got a big case?

You see those teenagers over there?

Run their names ... make sure they haven't k*lled anybody.

You mean the ones standing 6 inches from Ma?

You probably shouldn't let them out of your sight, either.

3x13 - Virtual Love

Where would Luke Skywalker be without Yoda?

Or the Karate Kid without Mr. Miyagi?

Okay, I said I would do it. I'll be a mentor.

Agnodice was the first female gynecologist in ancient Athens.

She was one of mentors.

You mean when you time-traveled back to the 1st century?

3rd century B.C. Marie Curie was also a big influencer of mine.

Who were your mentors?

Uh, police woman, Kojak...

Oh! Jim Rockford.

What was he cooking?

Beer.

Beer?

He's a microbrewer. This is his test kitchen.

Victim is Greg Jensen, C.E.O. and brewmaster of Overlord Ale.

Jane: Who found the body?

Jensen's assistant, ruby Burke.

She found him this morning.

...and then I came back, and...

She have an alibi?

Yeah, she was in Scandinavia for the last month.

She was selling her boss's Viking-themed beer.

She flew in from Reykjavik this morning.

When was he k*lled?

Maura: He's been dead at least eight hours.

Sweet poster girl.

No kidding.

Uh, gentlemen?

Huh?

Do we have any suspects?

Oh, victim's married. Wife's been notified.

Says she was home taking care of their two young kids.

We're bringing her in.

2.5-centimeter round hole.

Hmm. That's a very unusual entrance wound.

What was he stabbed with?

Not a Kn*fe.

Are we playing "process of elimination" again?

Yes.

It's not a garbage disposal, cleaver, pitchfork, pinking shears...

Uh, ladies?

Right.

Ah. But this... appears to be a metal rivet.

Maybe it came off the m*rder w*apon.

There's some blood droplets... leading into that mill.

I think we just found what's left of our m*rder w*apon.

The trace confirmed that the blood on the stick belonged to Jensen.

You think a sharpened stick could do that kind of damage?

Yeah. Doesn't explain the metal rivet, though.

Hey. Jane.

Oh, my g... Frankie, I'm so sorry.

Oh, no problem.

I've been having a barrel of laughs with your mentees.

Who has mentees?

Um... you.

[ chuckles ]

And you.

Apparently, Maura and Jane volunteered all of us ...

Toured booking, properties.

I was just about to show them how I write a traffic ticket.

This is snore-ville... population, you.

[ laughs ]

They're all yours.

Hey.

Hello.

Hi! Please... don't play with that.

Why you got a doll, man?

I was wondering if I could go see the medical examiner, maybe check out an autopsy?

Uh... no.

Why not?

'Cause it's not on the itinerary.

I'm taking A.P. Bio, so ...

Frost: Advanced-placement biology?

Yeah.

What, you think a reject kid can't be smart?

At least reject kids don't play with dolls.

Wait. I bet you call him an action figure, right, bro?

[ laughs ]

Yes, and if you touch my "action figure" again, I will break your face.

If I could observe an autopsy, it'd count for extra credit.

Okay, fine.

But you need to have your parents sign this liability release waiver.

Uh...

No, Dania, your parents got to ...

It's legal. I'm emancipated.

My mom's dead, and my dad's in prison.

If you don't believe me, here are my documents.

Okay. Come on.

W-w-w-w-wait. We want to see dead bodies, too.

Yeah. Better than this bullshit.

Oh, sh**t.

I bet you wish you picked the "chick" Detective now.

Sorry, fellas.

[ knock on door ]

Cover him up.

Cover him up, Maura. Cover him up.

Hi.

You're about to do the "y" incision?

Yes! And do you know why the "y," Dania?

To facilitate the removal of the breastplate.

Go ahead. Do it.

Uh... no.

Our release form doesn't cover slicing and dicing.

You said I could check out an autopsy.

I didn't say which part.

Okay, so, the first thing that I do is examine the body.

Does your release form cover gloves?

Yes.

All right. Do you notice anything?

His leg's a little swollen, but I don't see an injury.

You're very observant.

You think it could be deep-vein thrombosis?

I read about this w*r correspondent who d*ed from sitting in one place for too long.

Better be careful, Maura. I think we found your replacement.

Can I see the wound?

What kind of w*apon did that?

I'm not sure.

But the ragged wound edges suggest some kind of a barbed blade.

Detective, can you help me turn him on his side?

Yeah, sure.

Okay.

There we go.

We'll take a closer look with the fluoroscope.

Huh.

There's something lodged near T-8.

Looks like some kind of spear tip.

It looks like an iron krokspjot.

Aha! Just as I suspected ... a crockpot.

Krokspjots like this were used during the Viking era.

Oh. I think these are rune letters carved into the metal.

The runic alphabet is an ancient nordic one that predates latin.

Can you read what it says?

No. I'll have to consult a Runic scholar.

Well, Greg Jensen sold Viking-themed beer.

Maybe the spear tip came from his brewery or his office.

[ cellphone vibrates ]

Mm.

Okay, Frost and Korsak have a lead on a possible suspect.

Come on, Dania.

Cool. Can I watch you intimidate the suspect?

No. But hurry.

I don't want you to miss my mother's cooking class.

Frost: Thank your mom for that cooking class.

Dawg and Reuben almost got slapped upside the head.

Korsak, you were gonna hit your mentees?

Not me ... Frost. Mr. Chill can't take teen 'tude.

Take a look at this.

That is the Overlord Ale logo. But look at this.

Why would a brother want to be in a nordic motorcycle g*ng?

Ragnarok Riders is a motorcycle club. It's not a g*ng, Frost.

Well, the motorcycle-club logo is similar to Overlord Ale.

Don't tell me our victim lifted a motorcycle club's logo.

It gets worse. See the sexy Viking poster girl?

Yes.

Meet Sophie West.

Here she is with her daddy.

Clark "Skull Crusher" West ... head of the Ragnarok Riders.

He sued Greg Jensen, claiming copyright infringement.

Yeah, 'cause he couldn't sue for daughter infringement.

Jensen paid Sophie to be the model for Overlord Ale.

Daddy sued over the logo and lost.

The guy's a sore loser.

Hey, you watch yourself, pencil neck.

You watch your back. This battle isn't over.

[ click ]

Oh, I think we should pay Skull Crusher a visit.

[ alarm blaring ]

That's not a drill. Nothing's scheduled today.

Get the hell out of here, people!

Let's move ... now! Go!

[ siren wails ]

I left my mask from Nairobi inside.

I left my lucky notepad.

[ sighs ] I should've grabbed my swiss lithographs.

Look at this building. Do you see any smoke?

No.

And does your super-sniffer nose smell any smoke?

No.

I think one of Rondo's rejects pulled the fire alarm to get out of Ma's "fun with fresh produce" lecture.

All right, everybody. Some joker pulled the fire alarm.

Let's get back to work.

Told you ... false alarm.

Angela: Frankie!

Ma. What's the matter?

Someone stole my wallet!

Ok. I cashed my paycheck, I put my wallet in my purse.

I keep my purse underneath the counter like I always do.

That's not very safe.

Clearly Maura, thank you.

You don't think...

Yeah, I do think.

Me too.

I better put these mask right to...

Ok, put them in a safe.

I don't have a safe!

No one's taking your masks, Maura!

Ok, which one of you snap the wallet? Hm?

Look, anyone of you that "found" my mother's wallet you'd turn it now, we don't press charges.

You heard Detective Vanilla. If one of you is the guilty party...

Guilty party better speak up!

I didn't steal no wallet.

Me neither.

I want a lawyer.

Stand up. Do it!

Hold your hands up.

Whoever pull the fire alarm, is gonna have U.V. dye residue.

So? I took the alarm and turned it off.

Sure you did.

I didn't steal no wallet. I...

You can't prove nothing!

No, but we can file a misdemeanor for pulling the alarm.

I know that it doesn't seem like it, but they're all good kids.

Dawg has scholarship to B.C.U. And he can lose it, if he gets in trouble.

If?! Oh, he's in trouble!

You'll find that wallet, Rondo, then we'll talk.

...but I feel bad.

You think that 20 minutes with us will turn their lives around?

Hello. You here to support the Kids With Cancer Ride, too?

Uh... Boston homicide. Where we can find Clark West?

Clark!

What do you want?

We're investigating a homicide.

Wasn't asking you. I was asking milady.

Clark West. Friends call me "Skull Crasher".

You ride bitch, Detective?

No, I am a terrible passenger. We're here about a m*rder.

I'm busy. Gettin' ready for a charity ride.

Here's your choice. You can answer our questions, or enjoy a bitch-ride in a squad car back to headquarters You've got 30 seconds of my attention.

Greg Jensen, the beermaker you sued, was m*rder*d yesterday.

You know. Guy was a prick.

He might've had something like that coming.

We have video of you threatening Greg Jensen at the courthouse.

Stole my club logo. Made my daughter a marketing bitch.

Where were you yesterday?

Mass General. Pediatric cancer center.

Bringing toys, books to the kids. You wanna see the photos?

Big Carl here maxed up the camera memory.

Really cute. He signed them.

Good luck with your ride.

Thank you.

Hi.

I emailed the photo of the rune letters on the speartip to my old nordic history professor.

It says: "Olaf the Boneless"

The recipe to Viking soup?

Hm. Could it have meant "Ivar"... I wonder.

Hm, you too?

There was a Viking leader named "Ivar the Boneless".

Some scholars believe that he was a disabled dwarf, who was carried into battle on his shield. He was a great warrior.

How was a boneless dwarf on a shield a great warrior...

You... how'd he managed to do this?

Do what?

A boneless dwarf...

What was so urgent?

The crime lab found seminal fluid mixed with vaginal secretions in the victim's Tyvek suit.

It appears to be a month old.

In?

So, our victim had sex about a month ago and then... wore his disposable Tyvek suit again?

Yes. And they also found vaginal secretions on a spear.

Okay, that qualifies as the grossest trace evidence ever.

[ chuckles ]

Relax. The secretions were here.

Probably from transfer. Also about a month old.

And there was enough cellular material in both to extract DNA.

We're running it.

So our k*ller could be a woman.

[ cellphone beeps ]

Well, since a w*apon this sharp doesn't need much force, it's possible.

Korsak is interviewing the victim's wife.

I need one of those swabby things.

W... stop! I'll get you whatever you're looking for.

But I need a more precise description.

I have to figure out what you say all day long.

You can't figure out "swabby thing"? Really?

[ door opens ]

Mrs. Jensen, this is Detective Rizzoli.

Very sorry for your loss.

Thank you.

Mrs. Jensen was just telling me that her husband often disappeared for days at a time.

You have any idea where he was going?

[ scoffs ]

He said he was working on a new Ale recipe.

But I had my suspicions.

I think he was having an affair.

[ voice breaking ]

I'm right, aren't I?

We found a woman's DNA on your husband's clothing.

[ whimpers ]

Was he gone for an extended period of time about a month ago?

This has been going on for almost a year.

You understand that we'll need to rule you out as a source of that DNA?

Yeah, of course. Whatever you guys need.

[ sighs ]

I found a second phone in my husband's car.

I believe they're called "burn" phones.

I wrote the number down.

Maybe that'll help.

Thank you.

What were you thinking Detective Frost?

I guess I wasn't thinking, sir.

You sure as hell weren't.

I'm sorry, sir.

What was that all about?

I made hazelnut coffee.

Apparently, he doesn't like hazelnut.

Oh, boy.

Why is Cavanaugh in such a lousy mood?

'Cause he broke up with my mother.

You're kidding me.

Unh-unh.

You don't look too surprised.

Uh... your mother confided in me, and asked me not to say anything.

Well, good. I'm glad she had you to talk to. She was really hurt.

I think she still likes him.

How do you feel about that?

Like it's time to set a good example for Mrs. Buttinsky and not be Detective Buttinsky.

Run this number, will you? It's our victim's burn phone.

Wife seems clean to me.

Me too.

I'm guessing ol' Greg wasn't calling home on that second phone.

Yeah, he was. But not the family home.

Our boy had two phones for two addresses.

He was using his secret batphone to call... a back bay condo he bought a year ago.

I'm thinking not only was he cheating on his wife, he had a little love nest.

Let's go toss it.

[ indistinct yelling, scuffling ]

Boston police! Open the door!

[ doorknob rattles ]

[ man screams ]

Clear.

I think all that yelling is just this game.

[ scuffling, yelling stop ]

Korsak: Clear.

Olaf the Boneless. That's the same name that was on the spear tip that k*lled him.

Must be Jensen's user name.

Man. He liked playing. He's logged 2,738 hours.

He has some high-level weapons, too ...

Porgeir's a*, Thor's hammer.

And a saga shield? Damn!

You seem to know a lot about this, Frost.

I've dabbled in MMORPG.

Have you?

Massive multiplayer online role-playing games.

This one's called "Vikings of the Realm."

Why would you waste 2,700 hours playing a computer game?

Points.

Points for what?

To win!

Win what?!

Okay, so... Greg Jensen ran a successful microbrewing company, but he pretended to be "Olaf the Boneless" most of the time.

Look at this ... snail mail, addressed to the victim at a P.O. Box, sent within the last month.

No return address. Can't read it.

Looks like it's written in rune.

Hey, look at this. "Your whore is next."

I'm thinking our k*ller isn't done.

I'm just saying it's more cost-effective to get a quart of frozen yogurt if we're sharing the same flavors.

I like my own, okay?

Well, why don't you like it swirled? It's still mocha and mint.

No. When you swirl it, it becomes one flavor.

Coffee toothpaste.

Don't get your pepperoni grease on my half.

Okay, get your mushroom off my half.

Did you talk to your mother?

Lieutenant Cavanaugh looked miserable when we left.

Well, maybe because we have an unsolved homicide with a k*ller hiding in a video game.

[ man and woman laugh ]

Who's that?

[ man and woman laugh ]

He did not! A lavender VW bug?

God's honest truth ... lavender, for a guy who's...

You feel me?

[ chuckles ]

Who's gonna feel you, Detective Gibson?

Detective Rizzoli.

[ chuckling ]

How are you? Uh...

I was just dropping your mother off.

Did you permit this?

Well, I insisted they each have one foot on the floor when there's heavy petting on your mother's bed.

[ forced laughter ]

You're so funny.

[ chuckles ]

Uh, Ma, can I talk to you for a sec?

Uh... s-sure.

[ sighs ]

Oh, hey, I'm just gonna go upstairs.

I think I forgot to charge my electric toothbrush.

Okay, why are you doing this to Lieutenant Cavanaugh?

Okay, Jane, this is so not your business.

Yeah, it is. Especially when he's taking it out on all of us.

The ... the entire squad.

Well, then he's more juvenile than I thought he was.

You want to hear juvenile?

[ mockingly ] "If you were a car, you'd be a '68 Dodge Charger."

You don't even like that goofball.

Don't call him that.

And I do, too!

I don't believe you.

And if you are doing this just to get to Cavanaugh, then I'm gonna say the same thing you told me.

Don't. It's beneath you.

Jane.

Wh... Ma? A-are you crying?

I'm so proud of you.

W-w-why are you crying?

Because I raised you ... I raised a beautiful girl.

[ gasps ]

Ohh.

[ smooches ]

And... you're right.

[ sighs deeply ]

Thank you.

I love you, Ma.

I love you more.

Thanks, gorgeous.

Detective.

[ chuckles ]

That's a good sign.

At least she's not drawing attention to her mouth.

No sign of flirtation.

I needed a pick-me-up after that Porsche fiasco.

You hear about this, Rizzoli? Everybody's talking about it.

Oh, yeah, everyone's talking about that old "Porsh," Gibson.

It's "Porsh-ah."

Really? "Gibson" is an italian name?

No. But some of us know a lot about high-end italian rides.

It's a german car, you idiot.

I think they're crotch-blocking each other.

"Crotch-blocking"? Really?

[ cellphone vibrates ]

Mm.

It's my old nordic-history professor.

His office says he's almost here.

Mrs. Vanilla. We found your wallet!

Angela: Rondo, thank you! Oh! Where'd you find it, Rondo?

I knew you guys didn't take it.

Well, we checked the trash. Dania found it in a dumpster.

[ gasps ]

Is everything there, Ma?

Well, my license, my ATM card, my cash ...

Oh.

I'm missing 100 bucks.

Rondo: Are you sure, Mrs. Vanilla?

Okay, Dawg, let's go. We're going upstairs to booking.

No, Jane, wait. Let me handle this.

[ sighs ]

How would your mother feel?

She wouldn't be very proud, would she?

Rondo: Um... Dawg doesn't have a mother.

His mother passed.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh, I'm ... I'm sor... don't cry.

Don't cry. All right.

He didn't do it.

He's covering for me.

The money's there. I put it back.

Dania, why would you steal from me?

I needed $100 for a textbook.

Well, why didn't you tell the teacher?

I didn't want her to know ...

What?

That ... that you live in a teen shelter?

Yeah.

[ sighs ]

You went to the bathroom. I took the wallet out of your purse.

Dawg saw you coming, and he pulled the alarm to cover for me.

I'm really sorry.

I'm sorry, too.

Jane. This is professor Walter Lowell from the Department of scandinavian studies at Boston Cambridge university.

Hello. It's nice to meet you.

The pleasure is mine.

Dr. Isles was about to show me some letters written in the rune alphabet that you all would like me to translate.

Yes. I have some of the letters here.

[ loudly ]

We made copies of the originals.

Oh, floppy disks?

[ chuckles ]

Oh, yes, I certainly do remember when the floppies were the originals.

[ chuckles ]

When you said "old," I didn't realize that you meant he and Olaf went on Viking raids... together.

He's hard of hearing, but he can read lips.

These appear to be written in proto-norse.

That's an indo-european language spoken in Scandinavia.

It's thought to have evolved as a proto-germanic northern dialect over the 1st century A.D.

Please ... one nerd at a time.

Well, these are love letters addressed to a Viking by the name of Olaf the Boneless.

No, that's ... that's historically incorrect. it's Ivar the Boneless.

Hmm.

I hope he's not charging us by the hour.

Stop.

They were written by Olaf's lover, a Viking maiden by the name of Gunnhild.

Oh, dear. Olaf was still married to a different Viking maiden by the name of Undirmaor.

You know, "Undirmaor" means ...

Not now, Maura.

Exactly how deep into this game was he?

Listen to this.

"Your velvety beard still hums against the bosom of my tender flesh."

[ inhales ]

Okay. Well, uh, you've been very helpful.

[ knock on door, door opens ]

The DNA recovered from the spear is a match for the DNA found on the victim. It's from the same woman.

Maura: Thank you, Susie.

Okay, well, that's a big break.

Yep.

[ loudly ]

It was nice to meet you.

Oh, no, no, no, no, I'm not finished with your letters.

Sit. Sit. Have some tea.

Have some tea.

"Cold are the counsel of women." Cold, indeed.

Find anything on the victim's computer?

Nothing useful. He just used it to play MMOS.

No idea how he had a successful business.

I guess playing with Geirlaug of Gongu is more fun than making beer.

"Vikings of the Realm" game makers sent over subscriber information ...

12,000 names of people Greg Jensen played with.

I was about to go through them when Jane rescued me.

Where is she?

Trapped with professor Windbag.

Undirmaor and... Gunnhild?

I can't find under-girl, but I found the other one.

[ chuckles ]

Gunnhild is va-va-va-voom!

Her name is Kendra Dee.

She logs in from her house in South End ... conveniently located just minutes from us.

I'm not doing anything. I could help you pick her up.

Yes, that's my avatar. Can't you tell?

Yeah. Quite the resemblance.

Were you having an affair with Greg Jensen?

Oh, I was.

It was the most intensely passionate affair of my life.

We made love on the Isle of Thanet, Nottingham, York.

Ma'am, was this I.R.L.?

It was enchanting and magical.

Olaf swept me off my feet.

That's not what I asked. Was it I.R.L.?

It was not.

What's "I.R.L."?

"In real life."

Ma'am, have you seen this before?

No, but I can read rune letters.

It's the name of my lover ... "Olaf the Boneless."

[ chuckles ]

Did you write these letters to Greg Jensen?

To Olaf. [ sighs ]

It's a shame he's dead.

This has to be the work of Undirmaor.

She did everything in her power to drive us apart.

Do you know who Undirmaor is in the, uh...

... the I.R.L.?

No. I do not.

But mark my words ... I will get that woman.

Take my card a-and call me before you do that. Ma'am.

Ma'am. Greg Jensen was k*lled I.R.L.

Yeah. By an R.P.

"Real person."

[ cellphone vibrates ]

[ cellphone beeps ]

It's Jane.

We'd like to do a cheek swab for a DNA sample.

[ sighs ]

If you must.

Darn! Who am I gonna play with now?

[ sighs ]

Oh, my god. I thought that professor would never stop talking about underwear.

Undirmaor has got mad hacking skills.

Keeps changing accounts, deleted her avatar's history.

[ cellphone vibrates, beeps ]

Well, what do you know? It's Gunnhild.

She's cute.

She stopped looking like that in 1963.

She's at a secret gaming event. I'm invited.

Well, the DNA results haven't come back yet.

She could be our k*ller.

Uh-oh.

She's says she's about to make contact with Undirmaor.

Let's go.

[ indistinct shouting, metal clanking ]

There's Porgeir. And there's Thor.

And Grettir. And Refur!

"Refur"?

Well, I don't see my date.

Young man: Speak your preference, Viking kin ...

Raiding, looting, pillaging, slaughtering.

[ grunts ]

[ chuckles ]

Maybe... Erich the Blood a* has seen her.

Whoa! Your name, wench?

Detective Rizzoli, Boston homicide.

I'm sorry. W-we're role-playing.

Get it, yeah.

Uh, we're looking for a Viking named "Gunnhild."

[ chuckling ]

Sure, yeah ... the babe.

She's in the lower realm.

Woman: Come on! You've only got one life left.

Man: And I got to go back to the beginning.

Oh, crap. Mrs. D! Kendra!

Call for backup. We got to lock this place down.

Hey, you. You! Hey!

I need all units in the area at Solly's comic store.

Did you see anyone come in here?

Uh, no, sir. Ma'am. Ma'am.

Make sure nobody leaves this store, all right? Go on!

[ cellphone beeps ]

She was stabbed with a dagger ... just like in the game.

Who the hell is Undirmaor?

Because that's our k*ller.

Tell me you have something 'cause we don't have a single witness., Well, I found a hair on Kendra's cloak. No root ball.

But we are trying a new forensic laser technique.

It uses ultraviolet light and mass spectrometry.

Faster, please.

Zaps the hair and turns it into a gas.

Explain how that's gonna help me solve two murders.

It may help us determine what the k*ller ate and drank over the last year.

How is knowing how many ding dongs our suspect ate helpful?

The mass spectrometer results are back on the hair tests.

I know you've been waiting for them.

Thank you.

Because hair grows slowly over time, it creates a timeline of sorts.

Jane: Okay. So, what did the k*ller eat ...

Uh, let me see ... for breakfast in April?

That's interesting.

It certainly is.

Strawberry waffles? Eggs benedict? What?

Fermented minke whale and sheep's head cheese.

Where would you get minke whale and sheep's head cheese, assuming you'd want it?

Um... Scandinavia?

Scandinavia. Maura, what does "Undirmaor" mean?

In english?

No. In proto-hobbit.

Yes, in english!

"Underling" or "apprentice."

Apprentice. Or assistant.

Maura, we know someone who's probably been eating whale or sheep.

Frost: Got a warrant. Alibi was bullshit.

The airline just confirmed Ruby Burke, Greg Jensen's assistant, flew standby on an earlier flight from Reykjavik.

Nice, Frost.

Okay. Thanks.

[ cellphone beeps ]

Ruby didn't show up to work today.

She's playing "Vikings of the realm" somewhere.

So I put a bolo out in the realm?

No. I built an avatar to find her.

Looks just like you.

[ chuckles ]

We got to go in disguise.

I still don't understand the point of this stupid game.

Well, what is so hard about it?

You raid ships, plunder villages, k*ll sworn enemies... to win.

Win what? A fantasy lover?

Wait a minute. I don't think this is about winning.

I think this is about love.

You think Greg Jensen was having a real affair with Ruby?

I don't know. It wasn't much of an affair.

There wasn't any evidence of her at his love nest, and the secretions and the seminal fluid that we found were a month old.

Unless Jensen had pity sex.

Pity sex?

Yeah, one-time pity sex, right before he sent Ruby to Scandinavia.

I mean, he froze her out ... in real life and in the game, too.

So, Ruby must have stalked him in the game, figured out that he had a new virtual lover...

"Gunnhild," A.K.A. Kendra Dee.

Frost... check and see if Olaf is online.

Olaf? But Greg Jensen is dead in the I.R.L.

So explain why Olaf is online in his back bay love nest.

Not Olaf ... Undirmaor.

Hey.

[ indistinct shouting, metal clanking ]

Jane: Ruby, put your hands in the air.

Undirmaor: Olaf, my love.

Undirmaor. At last... you're here.

Ru... she doesn't even know we're here.

Korsak, unplug that thing.

No. No! Olaf!

Olaf, please come back, my love.

Ruby, it's over.

It's not over.

We were finally together. Turn it on.

Bring him back.

Korsak: He's not coming back. Greg is dead, Ruby.

[ crying, sniffling ]

[ voice breaking ]

I loved him.

He loved me.

Did he love Ruby Burke, or did he love Undirmaor?

He loved me. Me.

Olaf loved Undirmaor, and I thought... oh, god, if only, if only he knew that it was me ... me, Ruby, right there all along...

Did you tell him who you were before or after you slept with him a month ago?

I gave him my flesh.

[ sniffles ]

And when I told him I was Undirmaor, he just... he sent me away.

Ruby, you're under arrest for the m*rder of Greg Jensen.

No! No! Please turn it back on!

And Kendra Dee.

[ sobbing ]

No! No, he's not gone!

No, he's not gone! He can't be!

He can't be gone!

Aah! Go right to jail!

[ laughter ]

My turn. I want to buy me some property.

Hope you hid the good silver.

You pretend to be such a badass, but you're really a pushover.

I'm glad you brought them here.

Why? So you could study aberrant juvenile behavior?

They just need some attention, a little support.

I mean, they've never played a board game.

Can you believe that?

I know.

Maura, how much garlic did you put on this bread?

Six cloves.

Six cl...

They're homeless teenagers. They're not vampires.

What about Dania?

[ sighs ] Well, I'm gonna keep an eye on her.

And so are you. And we'll make sure that she puts that big brain to good use.

And I talked to Cavanaugh. The mentor program is now official.

Great.

Rondo: Yes! Whoo-hoo!

I wanted park place!

Oh, too bad, Mrs. Vanilla.

Hey, Vanilla.

Yeah.

I'm a landlord!

[ laughter ]

I never pictured an evening in with Rondo.

[ chuckles ]

Jane.

Hmm?

You don't think that your mom might...

I don't want to seem uncharitable, but...

Yes, I will make sure that the Rondo's rejects family does not move into your guesthouse, yes.

[ chuckling ]

Thank you.

Who's hungry?

I'm starving.

All: Me too!

Here you go.

Oh, man, this looks good!

All right, lasagna's hot.

[ indistinct talking ]

No, no, no. I got it.

No. No. N-n-no. J-just look.

Like this.

Okay.

[ laughter, indistinct talking ]