01x04 - Minos

[bunniefuu]

[arrow sh**ting]

It's getting dark, son.

We should head home.

We only have two birds, Mother.

Wait, wait, wait!

There's a big one sitting in that tree.

Right...

[arrow flies and lands]

There.

You have a good eye.

Thank you, lady of the forest.

If you're hungry, you're welcome at our table.

My mother is an excellent cook.

Where is your mother?

No!

Assassin!

[roaring]

[roars]

[yelps in pain]

[mother screams in anguish]

No!

[screaming] My boys!

My beautiful boys!

Hush.

Your boys are in the arms of God.

Why?

I wanted to get your attention.

What?

You were captured by Cyclops, were you not?

Cyclops?

A man saved you, you and the Oracle of Gaia.

Where did they go?

They were my only children!

[sobbing in grief]

The Oracle and the Mercenary, what became of them?

[weeping]

Sleep, sweet lady, in the everlasting paradise of God's eternal embrace.

I am the Oracle of Gaia.

The blessed goddess of Earth, sea, and stars guides me.

Did she guide you to my architect, Daedalus, too, or did he seek you out?

We all follow her unknowing spiral.

Speak plainly, or I shall place your liver before my priests.

Father, as an instrument of Gaia, she is protected by Poseidon and Keto, and carries the mark of Keres.

Oh.

Well, strip her then and let me see it.

It is on her heart.

Oh, how convenient.

Your champion is an Athenian spy, as are you.

Our only allegiance is to the goddess and her divine pantheon...

You dare spar with me, witch?

I am your servant, Majesty, body, blood and breath.

Perhaps, then, you shall have a chance to prove it.

An oracle must be a virgin, yes?

Naturally.

Their gift depends on it.

Very well. Tonight, Oracle of Gaia, you will present that gift to your King.

Bathe and anoint her pale, young skin.

I want her tasting of honeydew and sage.

And place her champion's head on a spike outside my quarters.

I want him to watch.

Majesty, you can't...

Enough!

What of his interrogation?

What?

You are always so thorough, Majesty, so I'm assuming you want to question him before he dies.

What for?

As you said, if he is an Athenian spy who tried to recruit Daedalus, he might have an insight or two.

Insight?

Into the secret world of our enemy.

I know how you like to gather intelligence.

Intelligence.

We will interrogate the Athenian spy... once we've finished with Daedalus.

I've missed you, old friend.

You have no idea how upset I was when I'd heard that you'd fled the palace.

My home, your home.

Did I not provide you with everything you asked for?

You can imagine my horror when I heard you were going to defect.

Defect?

To Aegeus, of all people.

My life-long enemy.

What are you talking about?

Come now.

A clandestine meeting in the forest of Troezen with an Athenian spy.

What Athenian spy?

Who had enlisted the Oracle of Gaia to, what, ease your conscience?

I don't have a conscience.

Clearly.

I treated you like one of my own, and this is how you repay me.

I was on my way to see you, my King, to demonstrate my flying machine!

Don't you see?

Your army could fly over the walls of Athens!

[wasps buzzing]

[screaming]

We should send emissaries east to our allies in Mysia.

Mysia has no interest in standing up to Minos.

We should at least try.

Beg!

Athenians don't beg!

We die in glory.

What are you doing here, boy?

The Prince has shown himself a master tactician.

We don't need tacticians.

We need guts!

What would you have us do, charge the enemy?

Yes! Open the gates.

Not at night like cowards hiding in shadow, but in daylight, so our blessed Athena can see our courage.

Our men would be slaughtered.

Better to die a noble death than rot behind these walls.

Please, Majesty, I can't breathe.

Your men shed their blood so you can push toys across this table!

Gather our troops.

Prepare to fight.

We would face mutiny.

Are you defying my orders?

Our men can hardly walk, let alone charge a well-entrenched...

[choking]

Lost your tongue, General?

[strangling]

Talk to me.

What's your advice?

Run to Mysia?

[coughing weakly]

You have all grown fat on my privileges.

Tomorrow, we show the immortal Gods what the men of Athens carry in their hearts.

Daedalus?

Weren't you even a little curious?

I assumed it was a chance encounter.

Let me get this straight.

Aegeus' firstborn discovers he carries the sacred Lexicon in his heart, recruits the Oracle of Gaia to help solve its riddle, and then, together, they meet clandestinely with King Minos' greatest scientific mind, and you think that's a chance encounter?

Yes.

Even though they're on their way to find the ring?

I'm not absolutely sure they ever actually found the ring.

You really are the most extraordinarily stupid creature I've ever worked with, Cyrus.

Thank you, ma'am.

And I suppose, when Daedalus rendezvoused with his troops and led them back to Minos' camp, you considered that a coincidence also.

No, I assumed the Minoan guards had been tracking him.

Daedalus, I mean.

So, what does this other son of Aegeus look like?

[gasping and wincing]

I'm sure you'll be happy to hear it's not poisonous.

Perhaps... what you will not be so happy to hear is that... it eats very slowly.

What does it eat?

Rats.

Human flesh.

But it takes its time, devouring... digesting...

Leto, my favourite surgeon, is most skilled.

When he cuts a small hole in your belly, you will feel very little pain, and after he has slipped his black snake into your stomach and sewn it in, you'll feel as if you've eaten a very heavy meal, that's all.

It eats very slowly.

It will take several days to eat its way to your heart.

I'm not an Athenian spy.

Shh, shh, shh...

Don't speak.

Don't speak, not yet.

Even if you told the truth, I wouldn't believe you.

A man will say anything to live, but when he is begging to die... the pain so unbearable... that he can't think how to lie.

Only then will I believe him.

You should feel... privileged.

You're my first patient.

[necklace jingling]

[grunts in pain]

Did that hurt?

Hmm...

That's odd.

You say you're not an Athenian, but you taste like one.

[groans]

Guards!

Back away, or I'll cut her pretty throat.

Stand your ground! He won't dare.

Don't test me.

Believe me, you do not want to find out what will happen to you if you k*ll the King's daughter.

The King's daughter?

Step back, or I'll cut her throat, Princess or not.

You are bold, indeed, Athenian.

Go on, cut me again.

Go on, cut me.

[Kn*fe drops]

No!

Keep him alive!

I'm not done with him yet.

Your father is King.

We must honour his wishes always.

Our men will be slaughtered.

Athens will fall.

You will be ex*cuted, and I will be tortured for the Lexicon...

What would you have me do?

Change his mind by whatever means possible.

You're the master strategist with all the answers.

Why don't you persuade him?

He's not thinking straight.

Are you suggesting the King has lost his mind?

Mother, before we even open the gates, our own men will turn against us.

If I do this thing for you, you must do something in return.

You're so clever at finding unusual ways to surreptitiously breach the enemy's defences.

I'd like you to use your skills for a kidnap.

What does he look like?

He's young, and very skilled with a rope, and his feet are painted blue, dark blue.

He survived the Cyclops?

He may be a guest of King Minos.

He was recruited by his inventor, Daedalus.

This will help you find him.

Let me explain how it works.

He looked dangerous, Majesty.

Apparently, he's the most dangerous man in our army.

Why were you meeting him?

No one must hear of this, Kimon.

Is that clear?

Of course You are in luck.

I have found someone who will act as your eyes... so that you can carry on working.

I imagine that you will want to make up for your terrible behaviour by working doubly hard to build a w*r machine for your King.

Hi.

Name's Thybus.

He is a very talented young man.

You had better come up with something sensational to win us this w*r if you want to win back our trust.

What's that?

The heart of the ox sacrificed to Ares, God of w*r, for tomorrow's battle.

So?

It is your honour.

I'm not eating that.

You will insult Ares and hurt our mother, Athena.

I've never had to eat hearts before.

Why now?

You've never fought a battle you were certain to lose before.

When the Minoans hear our cry, they will run screaming back to their ships.

Who is this?

The priestess of the moon will wash you in the sacrificial ox's urine, so that you carry its scent into battle.

But I don't want to smell of ox urine.

It is the scent of Ares.

Blessed Ares, fill the heart of Aegeus, King of Athens, with your wrath, blood and claw.

Oh.

What is that?

An omen of Hades.

I'm definitely not eating it now.

You will die a brutal death, but worse, much, much worse.

Your legacy will be tossed into the ashes, your name blackened by acrimony and cowardice.

Cowardice?

The world will forever know you as Aegeus the Coward King.

What can we do?

Nothing.

The die has been cast.

Unless...

What?

No. No, that will never work.

There must be something.

Well... Let me see.

If the priestess of the moon were to wash your body in anointed oils rather than ox's urine, and tested your virility for, say... three hours?

No.

No, better make it all night.

Then maybe I can offer your milk to Athena as proof of your manhood.

You want me to bed the priestess?

A sacred tribute.

Are you sure this will work?

So long as we postpone the battle until the next full moon to give Athena time to convince Ares of your bravery.

Very well.

Tell my generals of the delay.

Where did he find this man?

He did it on his own.

But how?

I think, though I can't be sure, that he disguised himself and went among the troops.

What does he want him to do?

I'm sorry, Lord, he won't tell me, no matter how hard I press him.

You are most fortunate, Oracle, to go to your death having felt the touch of the most powerful man in the civilized world.

Come sit.

Come.

You are most fortunate, Athenian, to go to your death having felt the touch of the most powerful woman in the civilized world.

Come... sit.

Huh?

Have I bruised your bold Athenian pride?

What divine gifts have you brought me, Oracle?

The sweet breath of Gaia?

Ambrosia from Aphrodite?

The wild appetite of Eros?

Your love will rob me of my gift, Majesty.

Ah, yes, the virgin soothsayer.

You're not in the least bit curious about the most divine gift of all?

My passions are sacrificed so that mortal men may see their destiny.

And what is my destiny, aside from your freshly laid snow?

Humiliation.

Humiliation?

What nonsense is this?

Would you like me to look behind the veil and see what the gods have in store for you?

[laughs] The gods.

The gods only exist in your imagination, Oracle.

All I have was won by the strength of kings, not the promises of gods.

Right now, the most powerful woman in the civilized world is also the most powerless in your company.

Whatever you do to me, I cannot defend myself.

No.

If I raise a hand, there'll be a hundred spears at my throat.

Guards?

Guards!

See?

We are alone.

I am indeed fortunate to lose my virginity to one so skilled in the art of love.

What?

I've heard many stories.

Your... reputation is legendary...

The Sabine women, the Nymphs of Amnisus.

[gasps]

Leda and the Swan.

That was Zeus.

But if Zeus is only in my imagination, then I shall replace him with you, God of love.

I've always fantasized about that swan, its powerful wings, its hard...

You've fantasized?

Can you imagine what it's like to help so many lovers, but never do what they do?

No.

I've dreamt of this moment for so long, it almost hurts.

Oh.

How would you like me, on my front or on my back?

Perhaps you have some sophisticated method I've never even heard of.

Uh...

Oh, this is going to be incredible.

Hurry.

Is it me?

Yes.

Would you rather I were a man?

No.

I can play a man if you'd like.

I have tools here...

No, it's not that.

What then?

I'm your prisoner, not your lover.

What's the difference?

When you've finished with me, you'll send me to the executioner.

At least you'll die happy.

I will hurt you more if you do not fight back.

What are you going to do with that?

This has never happened before.

Is it me?

I don't think so.

Perhaps if you drink some wine?

This is humiliating.

Oh, of course.

My vision.

Vision?

Humiliation.

Indeed.

What else did your vision foretell?

Haemorrhoids?

No.

Yes.

Oh, yes, if your constipation continues.

Your priests argue over your treatment... almost as much as you argue with your generals.

Their tactics are feeble, but even if they weren't, you wouldn't listen.

You follow your heart, and perhaps... the advice of your daughter.

She shares your... intellect as well as your... good looks.

Oh, but you must beware Narcissus... a constant distraction.

Are you saying I'm vain?

No, not I... the gods.

Unless you're careful, your vanity will be your undoing.

I'm impressed.

Perhaps there's something to this gift of yours after all.

[wincing]

The rope is too tight.

Good.

You don't scare me at all, Athenian.

Open your mouth.

[muffled protests]

[winch cranking]

Well?

How far did it fly?

Uh, like, not really fly, more roll.

Yeah, it rolled.

Can't you speak properly, you rancid excuse for a human being?

The box was good, though.

Are you eating that fig?

No.

What would you like to do next?

Oh, for the God of love.

We could try something different, like a grape.

A grape might roll further.

We don't want it to roll.

So, what's the point?

I mean, why throw fruit at Athens?

It's a prototype.

We'll have to make the spring stronger.

We?

You then, you and whatever it is you use for a brain.

Start with making the spring twice the length.

Better bring it over here so I can check it.

[whips spring]

Want to check it again?

You don't have to be so, you know, negative all the time.

If we're going to work together, there has to be mutual respect.

Yes.

From now on, I'm the senior partner, okay?

And you have to say stuff like,

"Thank you, Thybus," and "Please, Thybus," and "You're brilliantly talented, you know, Thybus."

Thank you, Thybus.

Why would Prince Lykos send a spy to King Minos' camp?

We don't know he's a spy.

He's a Dorian.

What?

A Dorian? Are you sure?

How did our milk-toothed Prince find a Dorian?

Clearly, he's not the Prince we once knew.

What's more worrying is he's not confiding in anyone, not even his scribe.

What about his mother?

That's what concerns me.

Why would she send a Dorian to Minos's camp?

We know she knows someone tried to assassinate her at the tribute to Apollo.

We don't know she knows we had anything to do with it.

But if she did know, what would she do?

Plot against us?

Mm.

Unfortunately for her, but fortunately for us, she doesn't have enough evidence, or, indeed, enough support within her own court to pose a serious thr*at.

Which you might think was a good thing, unless it actually turned out to be worse.

Worse?

What does a woman do when she's cornered?

Run to her husband?

The King saved her once by accident, he's unlikely to save her again by design.

Oh, no.

What?

If a woman finds she's made enemies of her close friends, she'll try to make friends of her true enemies.

I don't understand. What?

She's negotiating with King Minos.

Treason?

The question is what do we do about it?

Art they the demon goddess, stands at your door, but I shall wash your soul clean.

Yes.

I feel changed.

Athena has touched my heart.

What will she want in return?

Only your love.

This will transform my battle plans, breathe fresh life into our offensive, my army fired by Athena's wrath.

Not wrath... love.

Love?

What good is that?

Athena's cool fire must cleanse the demon goddess from your soul, wrench her claws from your heart, light a new dawn.

How?

Titan Helios, summer sun and winter light, act as my sentinel in this, my greatest hour of need.

Fire your golden arrow at the eldest son of Aegeus, King of Athens.

Hurry.

Ah!

My darling daughter, come in.

We're having mackerel, your favourite.

Come join us.

Are you fattening her up for the executioner?

No, actually, I'm giving her strength for one of her remarkable visions.

Wait till you see.

Don't tell me she's converted you?

I defy anyone, even you, Ariadne, to not fall under her spell.

Really?

Perhaps then she will tell us who her Athenian spy really is.

What do you mean?

He's no ordinary man.

He tied you up, didn't he?

What?

One flick of a rope and suddenly you couldn't move, right?

You see?

Who is he?

No one knows his name.

He's cursed.

Cursed?

Just let him go and pray for the best.

Why?

He's not an Athenian spy, he's a Mercenary who k*lled Cyclops, son of Gaia, goddess of the Earth and sea.

She cursed him.

That's why he abducted me, her Oracle, because he thought I might be able to protect him, or even lift the curse.

[chuckles] And how does this curse work?

Anyone who touches him, hits or strokes him, cuts or bruises him, does anything to him at all, will inherit his shame.

If that were true, you would have told us before.

I tried.

You're not falling for this, are you?

I'm not one for curses.

I like the odd prophesy from time to time, but curses give me indigestion.

Save yourselves and cast him out.

Come lie next to me.

I have another dream I want you to decipher.

She's very good at dreams.

And what about the Mercenary?

[sighing]

I don't know.

I have other things to worry about, but it seems to me if he's k*lled the Cyclops, if he's upset Mother Gaia, we should put his head on a spike.

I'll arrange it.

No!

You will inherit his curse.

Inheriting men's curses is my daughter's specialty.

[winch cranking]

It hit the roof.

Good, Thybus, you clever, clever young man.

No wonder Princess Ariadne speaks so highly of you.

[winch cranking]

[hook clanks]

Yeah. Looks like it worked.

Wait.

What?

There's someone trying to get out now, like a prisoner.

You have to imagine that's a Minoan soldier scaling the walls of Athens.

Whoa.

The prisoner's climbing out.

Does he have blue feet?

Yeah. How'd you know that?

Is he getting away?

No.

A guard's got him.

Come on, we'd better get back.

No, take me over there.

I want to check the machine.

Want to check it again?

Quiet, Athenian.

Come.

The Princess wants to see the prisoner.

The tortoise is a creature of Chelone, ordered to carry its home on its back after offending Zeus, so dreaming of a tortoise means that you have started to accept this place as...

[snoring]

Sleeping with the king?

[gasps in relief]

You're alive!

Oh, thank the gods.

Where's the ring?

I have it.

Come on, let's go.

You're not coming with me, Oracle.

Why not?

It's dangerous enough, me getting into Athens on my own.

With you, I don't stand a chance.

I can look after myself.

I know.

That's why you're staying here with your new lover.

He's not my lover.

No! Don't be ridiculous.

You know I can't...

[snoring]

Where is it?

It's in a private place, a very private place.

Hurry... or I'll find it myself.

You wouldn't dare.