01x04 - I Thought It Was a Choice?

Episode transcripts for the TV show "I Am Jazz". Aired July 2015 - current.*
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"I Am Jazz" focuses on a family and their day-to-day lives as their transgender daughter, who is about to go into high school, grapples with the usual teen angst in addition to her own challenges.
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01x04 - I Thought It Was a Choice?

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Jazz: Tonight on "I Am Jazz"...

Are you concerned about Ari having all that freedom and now living under...

I'm petrified.

Ari brings drama to the house.

And you're calling...

Stop!

Timeout!

I'm starting to feel like I'm the only one who's actually excited about Ari coming home.

"High school... some people are really, like, rude."

Oh, yeah. You have to be ready for that.

A lot of people just don't understand.

Like, they think that people could just choose if they want to be transgender.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I thought it was a choice.

We're gonna keep you, little guy.

Greg: I consider us an ordinary family with some extraordinary circumstances.

I thought of it as an oddity.

I was devastated.

Jeanette: Jazz asked me, "what am I?"

And she would say, "Mommy, am I a boy, or am I a girl?"

This is my sister.

She's a girl.

She's a girl.

She's a girl.

I am transgender.

Greg: We love her just the way she is.

I am a girl. I am an artist. I am Jazz.

[ring]

Hey.

Hi.

What's up?

Nothing. Just studying for finals.

Are you excited to come home?

Yeah, I'm excited to see you and everyone.

I want to know what's been going on with you.


I mean, it's just, like, right now, I'm only at the end of middle school and I'm already overwhelmed.

And it's mostly, like, the social aspect of everything, you know?

Yeah.

People don't care about your feelings in high school at all.

It's just been very overwhelming, but I'm glad that I get to see you soon.

It's been very hard for me, now that Ari is off at college.

I've looked up to her my entire life.

She really helped me find my path and a lot of my decisions have been based off of her, so, yeah, it's really... It's...

I miss her a lot.

Mom tries to help me, but she like hasn't been a teenager for like a million years, so she doesn't know as much as you.

You should listen to her a little 'cause she knows what she's talking about 'cause she went through it, too.

I mean, like, I do talk to Mom, though.

Like she's my main support, since you're not here, but I think you'd be even better, since you just experienced being a teenager.

Well, I'm always here. You know that.

I miss you.

I miss you, too, but I'll see you real soon.

Bye.

Bye-ye.

[Meows]

Greg: Did you guys finish your homework for the day?

No!

I have a lot of final exams and tests coming up.

Spanish and Math, right?

Mm-hmm.

Are you guys taking pretty similar courses to what Ari took while she was in high school?

Yeah, but we're doing better.

Ari did really well in high school, but college is a lot harder, 'cause she's not doing as well.

Not that she's doing terribly.

She's just not getting straight A's.

When is she coming home, though?

Greg: She's coming home this weekend.

So you know what that means, right?

You need to get ready to get your stuff out of her room.

When Ari went away to college, Sander moved right into her room and Ari is not happy about that.

I have not allowed him to change anything in the room, other than, like, the bedding.

And they're afraid of her. Ari is the big sister.

They're like they don't want to piss Ari off.

We're going to Gainesville, we're going to pick her up, we're gonna load her up, and we're gonna bring her back.

We all get to go?

You're all gonna go, definitely.

Me and Ari kind of bicker a lot and, when Ari moved out, it was, like, awesome.

I finally, for once, and he finally, for once, had our own personal space and we had some individualism.

Ari coming home means there's gonna be drama.

There's a wind blowing in from the...

North.

North.

And how are we gonna be able to solve this problem of three people, one car?

That's not possible.

Tbh, Ari's a better driver than all of y'all and she's gonna be driving me everywhere.

That's false.

You guys don't drive me anywhere.

That's why I'm excited about Ari coming home.

Because I ask you guys, "can we go to the mall?"

You're like, "oh, we don't shop."

Ari? Ari, she'll be like, "shop 'til we drop."

I say we get another car.

A lot of families have one car, or even no cars, in their family and they have more people in their family than we do.

You guys better kiss up to Dad because he makes the money in the house.

I think I've known Dad long enough to know that kissing up doesn't work.

Are you sure?

I know how to kiss up to Dad.

Oh, sh**t.

I know how to get what I want from Dad.

[Laughs]

Both: Tmi!

[Jeanette laughs]

This is fluid, right, transmission fluid?

No, it's not.

That's transmission fluid, down here.

That is...

Spark club.

Spark club?

No.

We're meeting Chris, who has been our longtime friend.

He knows about cars way more than we do.

We're trying to work with our dad to get a new car and see what options we could weigh down and which ones he'll actually let us get.

Or if we can even get it.

[Chuckle]

So, you have a small car right here, right?

And you're always driving your sister around, just like us, right?

Does Taylor annoy you about going places?

"When are you gonna be home, Chris?

I need a ride to my friend's house."

That's it right there.

Tap in with us.

We're like, "oh, we need to go drop Jazz off at practice."

It's gonna get even worse, because now they're coming into high school.

You think Taylor will have an easy transition from middle school to high school?

She'll get used to it real fast, just like we did.

I think Jazz faces a lot more hardships, because a lot of people just don't understand.

Like they think that people just can choose if they want to be transgender.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

I thought it was a choice.

The misconception about Jazz is that, because she transitioned at the age of 3, "she was too young. She doesn't know.

She was just going through a phase."

That's not what it is at all.

So you thought she could just one day say, "I want to be a boy again"?

[Suspenseful music plays]

Even Chris didn't understand.

But hasn't he known me for like so long?

That doesn't mean he understands it.

So you thought she could just one day say, "I want to be a boy again"?

I thought it was a choice.

I respect her, either way, but I just thought it was a choice.

Jazz was born with a girl brain in a boy body.

She did not choose to be born that way.

I basically didn't know what went on when she was born.

I didn't know what happened.

I thought, when Jazz was born, they gave her a decision, "do you want to be a boy or a girl?"

Just like you were born being "I'm a guy. I'm a guy."

She was born saying "I'm a girl."

Sometimes people don't understand what transgender is.

We didn't really understand ourselves.

'Til we got until like 5th, 6th grade.

Like your brain, with girls, your brain says, "I like that girl."

If you like a girl, you can't really just say, "oh, I don't want to like that girl anymore," if you actually really like her.

I see where you guys are coming from.

I felt bad that I didn't understand the full effect of what transgender really is.

You know, I just didn't really get the whole thing and I wish I talked to Jazz before any of this and I wish I knew about that a while back.

[Engine turns over]

Oh.

Hey! It started.

This'll be a good time to tour the campus, get a feel for it.

We are going up to get Ari home from college.

Yeah, on top of that, we want to have a good time, too, though.

We're moving into our senior year and I'm really excited to see the campus 'cause I hope it's my future school.

And to see the girls.

I'd rather just have fun.

What do you mean "have fun"?

School's not about partying.

Walking around a campus isn't that much fun.

Don't you want to see the dorms and the fraternities and the different buildings you would go to classes to?

Yeah, we want to see the fraternities.

Fraternities sound good to me.

Oh, just the fraternities?

I'm just happy to get away from my life, you know?

Like worrying about high school approaching and just...

Why do you have so much stress about high school?

I think the high school transition can be overwhelming, if you let it be overwhelming.

If you just embrace the change and accept it, just like you've always done with everything, I think you'll do just fine.

Jazz sometimes struggles with stress in life when she has a lot of stuff going on, which she does, more than most young girls like her age.

So she needs help and we're her big brothers.

There also are just people who just don't understand.

Like even Chris didn't understand.

Like, he thought being transgender was a choice.

But hasn't he known me for like so long?

He has, but...

That doesn't mean he understands it.

I know, but I thought he would understand, like if he knew so much.

We talked to him about it and we explained to him what it was like and he was like, "wow. I didn't even know that."

It's not an easy path, being transgender.

Like 40% of transgender people try to commit su1c1de.

So it pushes us to make a change, to make people support her and any transgender person.

Hopefully, people are like Chris, who just find out and he accepts you the same way and he still treats you the same way, and that's just how everyone should be.

Wise words from Sandy Man.

And I think you'll just flourish like a little blossoming butterfly, like you always say.

Okay, now Edgar Allan Poe Sander.

[Laughs]

Have you guys ever visited her dorm?

Once, only once.

Jazz: I've been to her dorm many times. I don't really remember what it looks like.

Jeanette: It looks like a jail cell.

This is her room, right?

Yeah.

Her name's on it.

Ari, she's the healthy one.
Coming in.

Ari!

Hey, Ari.

Hey, sis.

Congratulations on finishing freshman year.

Thank you.

Sander: Your room looks like a mess.

So... We're ready to go, right?

Greg: Not to pick on you or anything, but this room does not look like it's ready to be moved out.

I have a lot of stuff.

Like, how come your roommate has just all her stuff all in there and you have stuff everywhere?

Well, I was packing.

Jeanette: Wait a minute. Is anything in the suitcase, at least, or is it just empty?

It's empty.

I think Ari's room was a peek into what the summer might be like when Ari's home.

You're lucky we love you, because this is not fair.

I thought we were coming here to have fun.

We will.

Greg: Listen, why don't we break apart?

The girls will go together, except Mom will come with me and the boys, and look around the school.

Sander: See you, Ari.

Bye, Jazz. Have fun.

When we were video-chatting, I could see that you were having little problems at home.

I've been going through a lot, like, it's so much at once, you know?

I had this soccer clinic.

We were doing workouts and everything with all these high school girls.

But I was talking to them and they were saying, "you know what? High school, not everyone is gonna accept you. Some people are really like rude."

Oh, yeah. High school's very cliquey.

You have to be ready for that.

Who isn't nervous to go to high school?

High school's that big thing that is in the movies and you're still trying to figure out like who you are, what you're doing.

And, on top of that, she's transgender, so it makes it even more tough sometimes.

High school's gonna be rough.

It definitely is. You're gonna have good times and you're gonna have bad times, but then guess what?

What?

You get to come to college and college is... awesome.

You can fit in wherever you belong here.

I have to go through all of high school before I could go to college.

So did I.

I do worry about Jazz, 'cause there's just a lot of kids like her struggle.

I don't want her to be one that's struggling.

I want to be there for her and know that, like, she's loved and everything.

I don't ever want her to feel alone in this world.

Jeanette: Wait, wait. Look.

According to my map, this is the library.

Griffen: Yeah, we won't be spending any time there, Mom.

No, you need to go to the library.

Griffen, look, look, look.

What? Excuse me. So, my brother and I were thinking of going to school here, so we were wondering what it's like.

Well, we're both freshmen and I love it here.

Like I'm from Orlando, but I was thinking about going out of state and stuff and I just realized like this was the best place to be.

Our sister goes here and we're just like, "looks like a fun school to be at." How are the parties, though?

Parties are awesome, yep.

How about studying?

That's all they care about, are the parties, right?

[Laughter]

I'm like, "oh, boy. Double trouble."

Ari, take 2. Ari, take 3.

All right, well, maybe we'll see you guys when we're up here.

Women: Yeah.

All righty. See you guys.

Sounds good.

Bye.

I think this is really cool.

Yeah, I'm about to take you to a really cool place.

I want to show Jazz how really like awesome college is.

It's very diverse and multicultural and I feel like she can meet a lot of people that'll be like influential to her.

Hey, Tessa.

Hey-ey!

How are you?

I'm good. How are you?

This is my sister, Jazz.

Nice to meet you.

She came to pick me up from school.

She's trans and I wanted to show her like how nice it is here and how awesome the community is.

I'm just like, "what is this?"

Like this is LGBTQ room or...?

Yeah, this is our rainbow room, actually, so we just kind of, like...

We chill, we have conversations.

This is really cool. I'm really surprised.

This is definitely our safe space here.

This is where we can all feel at home and like meet new people, so it's awesome.

Are there a lot of transgender people on campus, or not really?

I don't know the numbers on how many are here, but there's definitely a diverse group of people.

You can find a community.

But my mentor from last year is actually a trans man, so that's pretty cool. I've gotten like to know about the issues and like his transition, so.

That's really cool.

Maybe I could add to the numbers.

Maybe.

I don't know. We'll see.

I don't think anyone comforts me as great as my sister does.

She just gets it and I just... I love her for that.

[Changes accent] You're my big sister.

Can we have, like, kind of a curfew now?

No. I'm an adult, so I can do whatever.

Are you concerned about Ari having all that freedom and now living under this roof?

I'm petrified.

Moving men are here.

Everything that's in a drawer is done, like, ready to go.

Do you guys need me to help?

Here, let's pull this a little bit to the side.

Did you really need this much clothes?

I like clothes.

This bag is not big enough to hold all her shoes.

Ah-choo!

Bless you.

There's so much dust, it's freaking me out.

Get paper towels and just dry out the fridge.

Ah-choo.

I found a skeleton in your closet.

That's all the shoes.

Take the sheets off.

You take it off. I don't really want to touch it.

Ew!

Ohhhhhh!

[All groaning]

I'm in college and we go out, we throw up.

Stuff happens.

Throw it out, now.

It smells like...

Aah!

Greg: You can do it.

Jeanette: Come on, muscles, let's see.

Yay for the minivan.

This is gonna be an uncomfortable ride.

That's a monster.

Ari: Oh, thank you so much.

Uh-huh.

Thank you.

I think the boys are excited for college.

I thought the campus was awesome.

It was beautiful.

The social life seems so much fun.

You guys can't get too consumed in the social life, 'cause then you'll do bad in school.

I could see my brothers falling into the party scene at college.

I'm a little worried about that, just 'cause I did and it kind of messed up my first semester a little and I just didn't have my priorities straight.

All I wanted to do is go out because it was just so new and so fun and like you just want to meet all the people you can in the world and you forget that you're at school and it's just, like, you need to remember that.

We tried to remind you that you were at school.

[Laughter]

You know, the one thing I want to say, though, is, when you guys are all back under the same roof and, Ari, you're coming home, it's not gonna be like we're living in a fraternity and a sorority house.

You know what I mean?

Can we have kind of a curfew now?

No.

So we don't have to worry about you?

No.

Why?

Because I'm an adult.

I have freedom, though, so I can do whatever.

When you come back home, there's gonna be some rules.

I hate rules. I really do.

You're gonna have to come home at a reasonable hour because the reality is I can't go to sleep while you're out at night. But you guys, also.

I mean, with the summer coming, you guys are gonna have set times that you need to be home.

Is this how you're gonna treat me when I get older?

Ari: Oh, my God!

What?

Oh, my God! That's what it is!

Oh, my God! That's what it is!

It's a bug! It's a big, huge bug.

I don't know what kind of bug it is.

There it is!

Oh, it's huge!

It was, like, talking to me.

[Laughter]

Are you as concerned as I am about Ari having all that freedom and now living under this roof?

I'm petrified. I'm really.

Like, her lifestyle, she's so used to not having to answer to anybody, but we're gonna worry about her.

I think, as a parent, you know, you could read a book, but that's not really reality.

They certainly didn't write a book on Jazz when we got her.

You know, you want your kids to grow and learn and live independently, but now we've had a kid that went off to college. We never had that before, so there needs to be certain parameters.

I also have that little GPS tracker thing on her.

Yeah, but you know what?

You're usually asleep by 10:00.

She's just waking up at 10:00.

[Laughter]

We still need to have the bottom line.

But I don't want the kids not working all summer.

Then we're gonna need that car, because there's no way that Sander, Griffen, and Ari can all be working and have one car.

You sure you don't want to use that minivan and cart them all around?

Nope.

I'm saying how I feel.

And I'm letting you know how I feel.

I worked my butt off.

Timeout! Timeout!

Hey, Jeanette, can you bring the family outside?

Oh, my God.

Got a new addition to the family.

Baby!

What?!

Oh, my God!

It makes me want to cry and just write a poem...

"oh, car, oh, car, you're so beautiful."

This is a gift, a new responsibility for the twins.

But...

Clearly, I'm not gonna be driving it, is what he just said.

It kind of makes me feel like they're getting special treatment, because I think my dad plays favorites.

He's able to relate to the boys a lot more, just 'cause they're boys.

I don't know. I felt left out.

I've been driving this since I was 16.

I've wanted a new car.

Uh, Ari, me and Griffen have had to...

I'm saying how I feel.

And I'm letting you know how I feel.

Me and Griffen had to share a car.

At least, you had your own car.

We're two people. Are you calling us one person?

We've been treated like one person since the time we were young.

And I've worked my butt off.

You're pretty much calling us one person.

I feel like Ari's being very unreasonable.

We've always had to share stuff.

This is our chance to finally get some freedom and have our own car, for once.

All I'm saying is, your argument is totally invalid.

We were very proud of you that day and you just...

Hold on. Shh! Timeout.

Timeout! Timeout!

I was looking forward to the joy and the happiness and, instead, I got the kids fighting.

It just made them all seem a little bratty.

This car, when I got it, was my car.

Yeah, and I apprec...

Hold on. Let me finish what I'm saying.

I spent extra money to buy this car, in anticipation of when you were old enough to drive, for you to be able to have a car.

I'm just saying.

I just thought I should share my feelings.

I'm sorry I shared my feelings.

Jeanette: Guys, Ari has a point.

Jazz: We have to be thankful.

Who cares? It's a car!

We use it to get from point A to point B.

Does it matter what it looks like? No.

Does it matter what type of car? No.

The only thing that matters is that it does its job... to transport us.

Okay? End of story.

I think this car's kitty's car.

Look, he already claimed it.

[Greg chuckles]

Ari will go first. Ari's the oldest.

Ari just got back from college.

Give her a little priority.

Oh, sh**t!

Yeah, Ari!

[All cheering]

Sibling rivalries are common and my job, as dad in this family is to bring the kids closer together.

Ooh, I hit that hard.

Ohhhh!

Ari: Look, we all went to the same spot.

Greg: We did end up together.

Except for me!

We're one big happy family.

So this brings up a point.

We got to readapt to what it's like to have six people under the same roof at the same time.

You guys got to share things... You got to share cars, you got to share bathrooms, you got to share...

Data.

You got to share data a little better.

It's okay to bicker a little bit about some of these things, but we have unconditional love, no matter what, and we support each other in everything that we do, so I think this is really something that we need to get back to.

We have that normal brother-sister relationship, where we fight sometimes, but we love each other so much and I'm so happy that Ari's home.

Life in the house was a little bit more boring.

She adds a spark to the house and really just completes the family, so I'm ready for things to get a little bit more interesting.

Greg: All right, we all cool?

All right, everybody hug it out.

No!

The balls hugged for us.
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