05x01 - Checking In

Episode transcripts for the TV show "American Horror Story". Aired: October 2011 to current*
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An anthology series that centers on different characters and locations, including a haunted house, an insane asylum, a witch coven and a freak show.
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05x01 - Checking In

Post by bunniefuu »

Excuse me?

We are close to Universal Studios?

It's about ten miles away.

Oh.

♪ ♪

(bell dings)

(bell dings)

(door closes)

I heard you the first time.

Reservations?

For us, uh, your hotel is not right.

You will please give us back our deposit?

No refunds.

But we need the money for a new hotel.

Welcome to America.

Look, you've already paid for one night.

Trust me.

This place will grow on you.

(elevator bell dings)

(bell dings)

(faint moaning)

Um, I-I forgot to ask you the password for Wi-Fi.

We don't have that.

In fact, this whole building is a dead zone for cell service.

There is a telephone in each room for your convenience.

Local calls are free.

$50 fee for losing your keys.

Anything else I can help you with?

Ice?

Ice machine is down the second hallway to the left.

Knock yourself out.

Terrible accident in room 51; just ghastly!

(shoveling ice)

♪ ♪

(line ringing)

Front desk.

We must change rooms.

There's a terrible smell in here.

It's a musty hotel.

Try running the air conditioner on high.

No, you must give us another room!

We're sold out.

Nothing available.

(phone clicks, dial tone drones)

(both gasp)

(screaming)

(screams)

Who was that?! What was that?

I have no idea.

Honey, I'm just as upset as you are.

(elevator bell dings)

And I want you to know you will not be charged for that room.

I cannot stay in this place one more second!

The police will be coming soon.

You can either give them a statement here or you can talk to them later in jail when they arrest you for evasion.

I'll get your bags ready.

Until then, you can stay here.

I thought you said it was no other room.

This one we never rent out.

(disconnect tone plays)

Operator (recording): We're sorry.

Your call cannot be completed as dialed.

Please check the number and dial again.


(jazz music starts playing)

(static hisses, music fades in and out)

Aggie?

(music, static continue)

(gasps)

(screams)

(indistinct radio transmission)

So, we think our guy lifted the master key from housekeeping.

Nobody heard anything?

Looks like both victims were chloroformed the second they walked through the door.

Lovely.

(camera shutter clicking)

Let's get some light in here.

(muffled moaning)

Male victim's eyeballs are in the ashtray.

And his tongue?

Man: He's in a world of hurt.

(muffled moaning)

(muffled): Get me...

Detective: John, this area's been documented already.

Not by me.

(muffled moaning)

They were married, but not to each other.

They were cheating.

Very pissed-off spouse, maybe.

No, this isn't jealousy.

This is something else.

The k*ller's saying the families are blind to what's been going on.

Man (mumbles): Get me out...

(muffled mumbling)

Sir?

Sir?

Sir?

We're gonna get you out of here.

We promise.

That's not what he's saying.

He's saying, "Get me out of her."

He's still inside of her.

You're gonna find male potency dr*gs in his system; probably a lot.

You won't be able to detach them here, so you're gonna have to take him with the corpse.

(man whimpers)

Cut him loose.

(moaning)

You have that report for me?

Woman: Forensics is still on the scene.

No, not from the homicide this morning.

From the Martin Gamboa case, last month.

Man: The victim's name-- Martin Gamboa, age 47.

Profession listed as Oscar blogger.

187 occurred in victim's home in Silver Lake.

Victim d*ed from blunt force trauma to the head.

There's evidence of wounds on arms and thorax; some defensive.

Whoever did this wanted him to suffer first.

Fractures to the radius and the ulna of the right arm; compound fractures of the humerus of the left arm with bone protrusions through the skin.

There are traces of what appear to be gold paint chips in the rectal cavity as well as in what is left of the cranium, so it may be assumed that whatever the m*rder w*apon was, was also used in the sexual as*ault...

(phone buzzing)

Hi, Dad!

How was school?

Good. Lizzy Cooper threw up in the middle of spelling.

It was gross and awesome at the same time.

The boys are calling her Lizzy Puker now.

How's Mom? Does she want to talk to me?

Hey, Mom, do you want to say hi to Dad?

Mom: No, honey.

Girl: Did you eat?

Yes.

Liar.

All right, you ready to read? It's almost bedtime.

Woman: Lowe?

You got a call on line three.

Take a message.

Uh, he was pretty adamant.

So am I.

Daddy, you can go.

Nope.

We read at bedtime.

Who's gonna start?

You.

All right.

"Boys are trying enough to human patience, goodness knows, but girls are infinitely more so..."

Can you cross-reference the Gamboa forensics with the hotel case-- prints, everything?

You got it.

(phone buzzing)

Hello?

Man: Hello, John.

Why didn't you take my call?

Who is this?

How'd you get this number?

I nailed them to the headboard.

I'm at the Hotel Cortez, room 64.

I'm going to do it again.

(phone clicks)

(bell dings)

(bell dings)

I need a room, one night.

150.

It says here 30.

It's out of date.

Prices went up after the remodel.

Okay, well, that's bullshit.

You know what?

It's your lucky day.

Mama's feeling magnanimous.

Room 64.

Oh, elevator's out of service today.

(sighs)

I got dibs on this one, Iris.

I haven't seen one that sweet in a while.

(indistinct pounding)

(muffled screaming)

(babies crying)

♪ ♪
♪ ♪
♪ ♪

When people die, they soil the sheets-- blood, sh*t, urine.

I can take care of every stain there is.

(laughs)

(yells, screams)

Woof.

You're a sight for sore eyes, Mr. Police Officer.

It's that obvious, huh?

Mm-hmm.

You must have a lot of run-ins with police.

My fair share.

What can you tell me about the occupant in room 64?

That room's vacant.

You mind if I take a quick look?

Oh, be my guest.

Liz Taylor.

Show this nice policeman to room 64.

64?

Yes.

Room 64.

Right away.

(Gabriel screams)

Help me!

Help me!

♪ ♪
♪ ♪

(screaming)

The more you scream, the more he likes it.

What can you tell me about the people that come in and out of this place?

They mostly residents or transients?

Oh, we got a bit of everything.

Some pay by the month, some pay by the hour.

Some of the old-timers have been here since the dawn of time.

And you?

Who are you looking for?

Not at liberty to say.

Oh, I don't mean that.

I can see the pain in your eyes.

It's very familiar.

Oh, you've lost something.

And now you're frozen in time.

Can't move forward.

Can't go back.

(Gabriel screams)

Tell me you love me.

(screaming continues)

Say it!

Say, "I love you, Sally," and it will all go away.

Say it.

I love you, Sally.

Say it again.

Say it... again.

I love you, Sally.

(music fades)

(elevator bell dings)

Alright, I'll take it from here.

I don't have any cash.

Money isn't everything.

♪ ♪
♪ ♪
♪ ♪

(gasps)

(radio plays jazz)

(static hisses, music fades in and out)

(child laughs)

(music, static continue)

Holden?

(panting)

(child laughs)

(music continues distantly)

(panting)

(upbeat music plays)

♪ ♪
♪ Got a big plan, his mind's set, maybe it's right ♪
♪ At the right place and right time, maybe tonight ♪
♪ In a whisper or handshake, sending the sign ♪
♪ Want to make out and kiss hard; wait, never mind ♪
♪ Late night in passing mention it ♪
♪ Flip to her best friend, it's no thing, maybe it slipped ♪
♪ But the slip turns to terror and a crush to like ♪
♪ And she walked, he froze up, leave it to fright ♪
♪ It's cute in a way till you cannot speak ♪
♪ And you leave to have a cigarette, knees get weak ♪
♪ It's only just a crush, it'll go away ♪
♪ It's just like all the others, it'll go away ♪
♪ Or maybe this is danger, and you just don't know ♪
♪ You pray it all away, but it continues to grow ♪
Ah...
♪ I want to hold you close ♪
♪ Skin pressed against me tight ♪
♪ Lie still, close your eyes, girl ♪
♪ So lovely, it feels so right ♪
♪ I want to hold you close ♪
♪ Soft breath, b*ating heart ♪
♪ As I whisper in your ear ♪
♪ "I want to tear you apart" ♪
♪ Then he walked up and told her ♪
♪ Thinking maybe it'd pass ♪
♪ And they talked and looked away a lot, doing the dance ♪
♪ Her hand brushed up against his, she left it there ♪
♪ Told him how she felt, and then they locked in a stare ♪
♪ They took a step back, thought about it, what should they do? ♪
♪ 'Cause there's always repercussions ♪
♪ When you're dating in school ♪
♪ But their lips met, and reservations started to pass ♪
♪ Whether this was just an evening ♪
♪ Or a thing that would last ♪
♪ Either way he wanted her, and this was bad ♪
♪ Wanted to do things to her, it was making him crazy ♪
♪ Now a little crush turned into a like ♪
♪ And now he wants to grab her by the hair and tell her ♪
Ah...
♪ I want to hold you close ♪
♪ Skin pressed against me tight ♪
♪ Lie still, close your eyes, girl ♪
♪ So lovely, it feels so right ♪
♪ I want to hold you close ♪
♪ Soft breath, b*ating heart ♪
♪ As I whisper in your ear ♪
♪ "I want to tear you apart" ♪
♪ ♪
♪ I want to hold you close ♪
♪ Skin pressed against me tight ♪
♪ Lie still, close your eyes, girl ♪
♪ So lovely, it feels so right ♪
♪ I want to hold you close ♪
♪ Soft breath, b*ating heart ♪
♪ As I whisper in your ear ♪
♪ "I want to tear you apart" ♪
♪ I want to hold you close ♪
♪ Skin pressed against me tight ♪
♪ Lie still, close your eyes, girl ♪
♪ So lovely, it feels so right ♪
♪ I want to hold you close ♪
♪ Soft breath, b*ating heart ♪
♪ As I whisper in your ear ♪
♪ "I want to tear you apart" ♪
♪ I want to hold you close ♪
♪ Soft breath, b*ating heart ♪
♪ As I whisper in your ear ♪
♪ "I want to tear you apart." ♪

And you didn't feel like going out tonight.

It's not the getting ready, it's the clean up.

Call housekeeping.

Girl: Daddy!

Hey.

(growls playfully)

(barks) That's what I've been looking for.

How you doing?

Good, how are you?

Hey, sorry I'm late.

Did you get my text?

Yes, and it's clearly more considerate than you, 'cause it showed up at 6:00 like you were supposed to.

Sorry.

Have a kid with a sprained ankle in Beverly Hills and twins with possible whooping cough in the Palisades right after.

Whooping cough.

Can you believe it?

Let me help your mother.

What's wrong with people?

I don't care how much they pay me, I refuse to see parents who won't "vax" their kids.

Doctor.

I made that quinoa casserole you two like.

Oh, good.

You okay?

Yeah, yeah.

I'm just hungry, I think.

Well, next time you should eat the protein bar I stuffed in your pocket.

Love you. Bye, Mom.

Love you.

(door closes)

Sushi?

Read my mind.

Yeah.

(tray rattling)

Vendela: Please, let us go.

Eh, stop your whining.

You brought this on yourselves.

(whimpers)

I went through your sh*t.

Looks like the two of you were planning quite the party.

Xanax. Klonopin.

Whatever the hell those pink pills were.

Those are for sleeping.

Your mothers know you're a couple of shameless junkies?

You're polluting your bodies with all that sh*t.

You dumb Swedish meatballs.

We're gonna fix that right up.

Yeah, we're gonna You flush your system, bring you back to the epitome of health.

Just look at the spread we got for you today.

Oysters.

Full of zinc and B12.

Boost your immunity, help your wounds heal faster.

And we got you some chicken livers... kidneys, packed with iron.

Get those red blood cells pumping.

And to top it off, a Châteauneuf-du-Pape Grenache blanc.

Yeah.

Please. Please, don't.

Mmm.

Shut up.

This is just the thing to get your bodies to absorb all these nutrients.

Stop. Stop. Stop.

Don't. Please don't...

We can do this the easy way or the hard way.

But I'm not leaving until you get all your vitamins and minerals.

Please, please.

All right. Come on.

No! No! No!

Breakfast of champions.

Open your mouth.

Sally: Do you really need to be so aggressive?

Can't you have some compassion?

You get the hell out of here.

You don't give a sh*t about these girls.

And you do?

I've seen what your caring looks like.

We've all seen it.

At least I care about something.

Think I want to be here, surrounded by junkies and decay?

Well, then why don't you leave? Go.

You've been whining about the same thing for 20 years.

You talk a good talk, but you stick around because the truth is you like it.

No.

I'm stuck in this godforsaken cesspool of pain and sh*t 'cause of you.

Eh.

You're the beginning and the end of all my suffering.

Good.

Well, I'm done.

Done with your bullshit.

Done with it all.

You think you can do this better?

Then you do it yourself.

But you better do a good job.

Otherwise you can explain to her why they still taste like sh*t.

(sighs)

I got to go feed that thing in room 33.
Vendela: Please.

Please.

Please.

Please.

Do you know what this room used to be?

This old dude used to put on a puppet show right there.

Marionettes, strings, for entertainment.

And now you... are going to entertain me.

Move me with your tears.

Run.

Run!

Oh, crap.

♪ ♪

I don't know what happened.

She got loose somehow.

This can never happen again.

Shouldn't we ask if any of this fish is from Japan?

Why?

Radiation.

(chuckles)

You're starting to sound like your mother.

She always said she had a good reason to worry.

I had a dream about him again last night.

I can't see his face anymore.

I can't remember it except in my dreams, then I can really see it.

When I wake up...

I can't remember.

Do you remember what he looks like when you're awake?

Yeah.

Maybe we should put the pictures up again.

(cell phone chimes)

No electronics at the dinner table.

It's your mom.

(phone line rings)

Alex: You've reached Alex, please leave a message.

(tires screeching)

(home alarm wailing)

Girl: Dad, what's happening?! Been inside yet?

Officer: No, I just got here. What's going on, Detective?

John: I don't know yet. Watch my daughter.

(home alarm continues wailing)

(alarm continues wailing)

(indistinct radio transmission)

(leaves rustle)

(alarm continues wailing)

(cell phone buzzes)

Alex, are you okay?

k*ller: John Lowe.

Who is this?

Where's my wife?!

I told you I'd do it again.

(alarm continues wailing)

Show me your hands!

(alarm continues wailing)

John: Stop...

Stop!

(screaming)

Scarlett!

(alarm continues wailing)

John: All right, honey, you got it?

Oh, so close.

I'm gonna take Holden to the carousel.

All right, babe.

Come on, buddy.

(gasps) Slow it down, slow it down.

Remember, hold it like a pencil.

Throw it like a baseball.

Concentrate on where you want it to go.

Ready? Go.

Oh! Good job!

You hungry, buddy?

Yeah, I want some cotton candy.

(chuckles)

You got to eat some real food first.

I'm not hungry for that.

No? All right, we'll get something after.

Here you go.

You got one with yellow feet.

He's a special one.

***

Holden?

Hey, you seen my boy?

He was on that horse with the yellow feet.

Holden!

Holden!

Holden?!

Holden?!

Holden!

Holden! Holden!

Alex: I mean, maybe we should just go stay with Mary.

John: In New Hampshire? I don't want to do that to Scarlett.

It's already gonna be hard enough as it is.

She should be able to sleep in her own bed.

I'm gonna have two uniformed men with you at all times.

One's gonna go to school with Scarlett, one's gonna go to work with you, and these guys are very good at what they do.

You're not even gonna know they are there unless you need them.

Do you even know what this guy looks like?

I don't understand how he texted you from my phone.

I mean, do you think that he knows where we live?

Jesus, John.

What are we gonna do, huh?

Maybe I should get a g*n.

No. No, you-you don't need to get a g*n, all right?

There are ways to clone somebody's phone, all right?

Don't worry.

I'm gonna keep you guys safe.

What, by moving out?

I have a feeling he's gonna come after me again, and if that happens, I don't want either of you near me.

Look, I'm not upset because you're leaving.

I'm upset because I...

I secretly want you to go.

I-I understand. You...

I shouldn't have brought Scarlett to that house.

I thought you were in trouble, I-I told that idiot cop to watch her.

I'm not mad about that.

I know you would never put her in danger.

And I don't blame you for Holden.

No matter what you think.

I love you so much.

He looks just so much like you.

I see him in your face every day and I just want to die.

It's not fair-- they took my little boy from me, and I can't even look at the one person in the world who understands how I feel.

I just need a break from it all.

Do you ever hope?

(swallows)

I can't stop hoping.

That's the worst part.

♪ ♪

Welcome.

The rain may have stopped, but it's still a gloomy day.

I had to put my dog down.

He came to me through very unfortunate circumstances.

But you don't need to hear about that.

Right this way.

So many buildings around here are time capsules, locked away by an impersonal business trust.

I prefer dealing with a trust.

Anonymous. Unsentimental.

So you'll live here, or just work here?

I know that you were interested in the top floor.

We're moving our life out here.

Work, home-- I've never kept them separate.

It's very clear to me: the art world has looked to L.A., and fashion is soon to follow.

The top floor is where I'll live and just below will be an atelier, mostly ready-to-wear.

Lachlan!

Lachlan!

Lachlan?

Oh.

So much energy.

Iris: How can I help you?

Uh, I'm the realtor representing the sale. We're here for the walk-through.

We'll let you know if we need anything.

Sale?

What sale?

Marcy: Well, I know it was a whisper listing, but surely, the owner should have told you.

Nobody tells me sh*t.

I've never even met the owner.

Marcy: Well, you have now, dearie.

This is the new owner, Mr. Will Drake.

We'll start with the penthouse?

We'll let you know if we need anything.

(keys jingling)

We're gonna be turned out onto the streets.

(elevator bell dings)

(hisses)

The clouds have cleared.

Sightlines all the way to the Pacific.

Donovan: Close it!

The light!

Who the hell are you people?

And what are you doing in my room?

We've been invaded.

Shanghaied!

Some g*dd*mn New Yorker is sizing up my suite.

A little early for you, isn't it?

Marcy: I know you'll prefer the view from the space we just saw, but here's the other half of the floor plan.

The lighting is, of course, a challenge and I don't know if all this neon is the answer.

Will Drake.

I am so pleased to meet you.

I was completely impressed with the gown you made for Mrs. Obama.

It was the state dinner for...

The Spaniards, yes.

Kind of you to mention.

I'm on a cleanse.

Not anymore.

(snaps fingers) Lachlan! Honestly.

Fingerprints are really hard to get off.

Messes are always forgiven.

The first time.

Is...

Yes.

It's an Arik Levy and it doesn't come with the building.

Of course, I'm hopeful you're as interested in the character of The Cortez as we are.

There's energy here.

I walk through New York streets and I don't hear the music anymore.

No more echos of who I was there.

Blocks are toppled, history erased, weirdoes banished.

This place is far enough away that it speaks to me-- it sings, even.

Well, I cannot wait to see what you make of it.

That's really beautiful.

So where are weirdoes like us supposed to live, huh?

Any songs telling you anything about that?

Perhaps you could show our neighbor the James Turrell light sculpture?

Dad, can I stay and look at the records?

Of course you can.

People aren't supposed to live in hotels.

Well, maybe this place is special.

I want to show you something you'll enjoy.

We'll only be gone a moment.

(elevator bell dings)

I lived in New York, many years ago.

I loved roaming the streets, devouring the pulse of the city.

Electrifying.

I miss it very much.

Did your father give you a choice when it came time to leave?

My dad says I'm not supposed to talk to strangers.

We're not strangers, Lachlan.

We're going to be great friends.

Here we are.

What's so special about a hallway?

(knocks)

(electronic beeping)

Holden, we have a guest.

Where are your manners, angel?

Hello. Want to play?

(elevator bell dings)

Iris: Did you hear?

They sold the hotel.

We'll be cast to the wind.

Consider it a blessing, Mother.

You should have left this place years ago.

I'm here because I need to see you every day.

Time for you to let go.

(over radio):
♪ When you're alone ♪
♪ And life is making you lonely ♪
♪ You can always go ♪
♪ Downtown ♪
♪ When you've got worries ♪
♪ All the noise and the hurry ♪
♪ Seems to help, I know ♪
♪ Downtown ♪
♪ Just listen to the music ♪
♪ Of the traffic in the city... ♪
♪ ♪

Iris: Can you tell me what room they're in?

The couple that just came in?

I'm sorry, lady.

This is a no-tell motel.

That boy is my son and that junkie's about to give him dope.

(sighs)

Here.

Oh, come on.

Where's the nearest ATM?

At the corner drugstore, right next to the maxi pads.

(sighs) Oh, brother.

g*dd*mn it.

There we go.

(sniffs)

Ah...

(laughs)

You're gonna give me a fresh needle, right?

I'm the cleanest person you know.

(giggles)

(pounding at door)

(kissing sound)

(pounding continues)

Yeah?

(pounding continues)

What'd you give him?

Donovan?

He's out cold.

Who invited you in, lady?

What did you give him?!

China White.

Which means he is just where he wants to be.

Call 911!

No one's calling anyone.

Come on... I told him not to try and keep up with me.

We took the same sh*t and I am more than fine.

At least until you barged in.

You can't leave!

Oh, please.

You know how much I paid for this dope?

(crying): Oh, God.

Oh, God...

Oh, God...

(door slams shut)

(humming quietly)

♪ ♪

(approaching footsteps)

(screaming)

(coughs)

("Hotel California" begins)

Who are you?

Your boy has a jawline for days.

♪ ♪
♪ On a dark desert highway ♪
♪ Cool wind in my hair ♪
♪ Warm smell of colitas ♪
♪ Rising up through the air ♪
♪ Up ahead in the distance ♪
♪ I saw a shimmering light ♪
♪ My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim ♪
♪ I had to stop for the night ♪
♪ There she stood in the doorway ♪
♪ I heard the mission bell ♪
♪ And I was thinking to myself ♪
♪ This could be heaven ♪
♪ Or this could be hell ♪
♪ Then she lit up her candle ♪
♪ And she showed me the way ♪
♪ There were voices down the corridor ♪
♪ Thought I heard them say ♪
♪ Such a lovely place ♪
Such a lovely place
♪ Such a lovely face ♪
♪ They livin' it up at the Hotel California ♪
♪ What a nice surprise ♪
What a nice surprise
♪ Bring your alibis ♪
♪ Mirrors on the ceiling ♪
♪ The pink champagne on ice ♪
♪ And she said, we are all just prisoners here ♪
♪ Of our own device ♪
♪ And in the master's chambers ♪
♪ They gathered for the feast ♪
♪ They s*ab it with their steely knives ♪
♪ But they just can't k*ll the beast ♪
♪ Last thing I remember ♪
♪ I was running for the door ♪
♪ I had to find the passage back ♪
♪ To the place I was before ♪
♪ Relax, said the night man ♪
♪ We are programmed to receive ♪
♪ You can check out any time you like ♪
♪ But you can never leave... ♪
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