05x04 - Devil's Night

[bunniefuu]

(bell rings)

How may I he...?

Devil's night.

I have a standing reservation.

Of course, Mr. Ramirez.

Well, my pleasure to welcome you to the Hotel Cortez.

Uh, this is your second year joining us?

Third.

I d*ed in 2013.

(laughs): Apologies.

Let me show you to your room.

Ramirez: I was hoping Manson could join us this year.

Liz: Charlie hasn't shuffled off this mortal coil yet.

He's still serving life in State prison.

Aw, that's too bad.

Your room, sir.

The master has left a couple of treats on the pillow.

I don't need a key.

♪

(grunts)

(screams)

(shushes)

Shut up!

Swear to Satan you won't scream or I'll k*ll you.

(muffled grunts)

I said swear to Satan!

I swear to Satan.

(screaming)

You liar!

No! (coughing)

(mumbling)

(crackling)

Help! Help me!

There's a k*ller after me!

And a k*ller before you.

Ricky!

Found your presents.

Tourists from Arizona.

Marriot was full.

Come, finish her off.

(whimpers)

Hello?

Hey, Dad.

Hey, sweetie.

Hey.

How was Disneyland?

It's pretty cool.

I was just on my way out.

Uh, I'll be over at Grandma's in about an hour.

We've got some Halloween shopping to do.

I don't really feel like going trick-or-treating this year.

Oh, um, okay.

We can do something else.

Actually, Grandma was gonna teach me how to make banana cream pie.

Kind of takes a while.

Oh, you want to stay over there for a lit... a little while longer?

If that's okay.

Look, things are a little bit...

(bubbling nearby)

...weird right now, aren't they?

A little bit.

I got to go.

Bye, Dad.

Bye, Scar.

I love you.

(blood dripping rapidly)

(gasps)

Boy: I don't like my costume.

Come along, Albert.

Here, put this on.

I don't like my costume.

Nothing's good enough for you, Mr. Bellyache.

There are places in the country where they put paper bags over the children's head and call that a costume.

Shake a leg.

I like to be punctual.

(laughing): Well... look at you, Molly Wilkins!

You must've been sewing for months!

Pulled out all the stops, didn't you, with that expensive lace?

Oh, goodness, I wish I'd had time to sew a proper pattern...

Boo!

You're a scary little ghost.

Ms. Evers: ...do things with your time, while I'm taking in the laundry and mending clothes.

But I'm so envious.

You look so lovely.

I do feel bad for little Albert.

He wanted an African cheetah costume, but I just never found the time.

Where is he, the little rascal?

(car engine starts up)

No! Please stop!

(knocking)

Who is it?

It's John Lowe from downstairs.

Oh!

I'm busy!

I'm working on these sheets!

What happened here? Was there an accident?

It happens every year.

At this time.

I-I lost my boy on Halloween.

So every year I go a little mad and I make a mess of everything.

And I can't get a-a handle on the sheet situation.

You lost your boy?

You mean he d*ed?

Not right away.

How did you lose him?

I didn't see!

I wasn't paying attention!

(crying): It was my fault!

I should've made him a proper costume, like all the children.

I know how that feels, especially around the anniversary.

I-I made him wear a plain old sheet.

Just a plain old sheet.

Why didn't I pay more attention?!

I'm not really sure.

I feel like I'm living in a walking nightmare.

Would you like a sherry?

I'm okay, thank you.

I'll let you get back...

Will-will you pour me one?

Talking with you is a comfort to my soul.

They searched the city for days.

But he wasn't in the city.

His k*ller... took him to his ranch up in Wineville.

(chickens clucking)

Oh, God, help me!

He haunts my dreams.

His woeful eyes pierce me with accusations.

Why weren't you careful Mommy?

Didn't you love me, Mommy?

(crying)

Of course I loved him!

At least you know what happened to your boy.

But I don't.

Not really.

This is all we found of your boy, ma'am.

That sicko disposed of all their bodies in quicklime.

And then he scattered their bones in a mass grave.

Oh...

(screams)

They never were sure exactly how many children there were.

That is a terrible story, Ms...

Evers.

Hazel Evers.

You can call me Hazel.

I'm John.

I know.

I have a confession to make, John.

I've known for a while that we were kindred spirits.

(laughing)

Oh, my!

Oh, my, it's so late and I'm so behind!

There's so much to do before the shindig tonight, and so little time!

The master will be very very upset if his table isn't perfect.

His autumnal banquet is the event of the year.

These particular guests, they're very demanding.

Refills, refills, refills!

My feet are swollen up like puff pastries by the end of the night!

(barking)

Jasper, stop that.

Come here, come here.

Jasper, come on.

In here.

(Jasper growls)

He's a sweet dog.

He just doesn't know who you are.

We got him two years ago.

Your sister was lonely.

I'm gonna do an exam.

It'll only take a minute, okay?

It's too bright.

Sorry.

I'm sorry. Come over here, baby.

Can you sit still for me?

(thermometer beeps)

Do you feel cold?

No.

No?

Do you know where you are, baby?

Hmm? Do you remember this house?

You're home.

You're finally home, baby.

Oh, I've missed you so much.

I'm thirsty.

Of course you are.

I'll get you some juice, all right?

Be right back.

(sobs quietly)

(sobbing)

(sniffs)

Holden, I've brought you an apple juice and an orange juice.

Wasn't sure which one...

Holden?

Holden!

(Jasper whimpers)

What is wrong with you?

I don't feel good.

I need my mommy.

Baby, I am your mommy.

My other mommy.

It's confirmed.

Blood on your junkie wasn't his.

So we're looking for a body now.

You don't think we have enough bodies?

Hey, how come I've never heard of a town where 20 kiddie murders and abductions supposedly took place?

Are you talking about the Wineville Chicken Coop Murders?

They changed the name of the town.

Bad publicity.

When?

Hell, 60 years ago?

Eighty-five.

85... years...

The crimes took place in the '20s?

Does this have something to do with our Bible-thumper?

I don't know.

Hahn: John?

John, you okay?

♪

Countess: You must have a lot of questions.

I have answers.

It must have been a shock for you to see your boy.

I imagined you'd lost hope long ago.

I never gave up.

No, you didn't.

Your devotion moved me.

I could feel your longing.

Holden felt it, too.

That's why he came to you.

You stole my son.

I saved him.

Like I save all my children.

From what?

Neglect.

I could see where they were headed.

A tragic, wasted life.

I opened my heart and the children came to me willingly.

I never neglected my son.

Can you say the same about your husband?

Here you go.

(phone buzzing)

Yeah.

Yeah, I'll meet you at the station later.

John: Holden!

(carnival music playing)

Holden?!

Holden!

I brought them here to keep them safe.

The world can be such a dangerous place.

I've had enough of your bullshit.

What did you do to my son?

You're a doctor.

I'm going to put it to you in a way that you can understand.

Holden has contracted an ancient virus.

A blood disorder.

The effect of the disease is health, vitality and everlasting life.

Whatever you did to him... change him back.

Is this why you came up here?

Change him back or I'll k*ll you.

There is no going back.

No.

I'm his mother.

We'll find a cure.

There is no cure.

The only way you can truly be with Holden is to join him.

Alex, I'm offering you eternity with your great lost love.

What I wouldn't trade for a chance at that.

And what are you asking me to trade for it?

What's the price I have to pay to be like you?

Your undying loyalty.

You'll be working for me.

Here.

Take this. It will calm your nerves.

You're insane.

You're going down.

I'm getting the police.

(screams)

(whimpers)

Let her go.

She said she's gonna go to the cops.

She won't.

She would never risk losing her one true love.

Wait, you're banging her, too?

♪

What'll it be, soldier?

Ginger ale?

Shirley Temple?

My soon to be ex-wife says I was never an alcoholic.

According to her, I'm just a control freak.

I'll have a double martini.

That's my boy.

Control... is an illusion.

John: Tonight I surrender to the illusion.

(cocktail shaker rattles)

(rock music playing)

Woman: Hey, sailor.

Didn't see you come in.

I will stand on my head in a skirt for a ciggy and a beer.

No need for acrobatics.

Drinks are on me tonight.

Liz: Now, Aileen, you be nice to Mr. Lowe.

This is, what, your tenth year with us at the hotel?

Lucky 13th!

Liz: Ooh!

Since 2002.

Do I know you?

I don't know.

You ever picked up a hooker along I-95 in Florida?

No, I think I'd remember that.

John... is a police officer... and a special guest of the hotel.

Cop.

A cop.

(laughs)

Man! Man.

(bottle clunks on bar)

Man, are you lucky that I haven't had a beer in over a year, or there is no way in hell I would let you buy me one.

They call me a serial k*ller?

Greatest serial k*ller of all time is the cops.

I know who you are.

That is an outstanding costume.

Holy sh*t, you look just like her.

Her who?

Aileen Wuornos.

Just saw a documentary about her. She k*lled seven men. sh*t them in cold blood.

(cap pops off bottle)

(sighs)

Sometimes even I think that's true.

I wasn't more than four or five when the world started taking from me.

You know what you do when all you know is people taking?

You start to give, give it away before they can take it from you.

Give it all away for free, and that way, you can pretend that it doesn't hurt.

Those seven men?

We had a deal.

We had a deal.

Then they got greedy, started taking things didn't belong to 'em.

Here's how it is, Detective: you try and take anything from Aileen Wuornos and I swear to Jesus H. Christ I will take everything from you.

This is what I say to you, Aileen: That's bullshit.

Yeah?

Yeah.

Most of those men didn't have a history or record of v*olence or as*ault.

I don't know, I don't know their, I don't know their history.

I only know who they were on that day.

I only knew them on that one day, and on that one day, they were who they were.

Haven't you ever had a day like that, huh?

Yeah.

Where-where all you were, all you ever had been your whole life don't mean nothing to you anymore?

And all of a sudden... you're just a different person, huh?

Yeah.

Yeah?

Today.

When was the last time you got laid, huh?

When was the last time a chick really... really turned you inside out?

You don't know screwing until you spend an hour alone with a batshit crazy hooker.

I got a room.

Where I can roll.

Darling John, you're too drunk to see how ugly that woman is.

I'm too drunk to care.

(laughs)

(chuckles)

You assh*le.

g*dd*mn cops.

You can't trust any of them.

Stop taking from me!

I'm tied to a chair!

Well, I ain't no liar.

Ten women this sh*t country put to death, Ten.

And I was number ten.

Stop it! You're insane!

You're not Aileen Wuornos!

Yeah?

Look at me.

Look at my eyes.

Look at 'em.

This look like a Halloween costume to you?

(snickers)

Welcome to Devil's Night at the Hotel Cortez, John.

Ain't you...

(groans)

Yeah, you like that?

(screams)

Die, you p*ssy boy!

assh*le!

Get... get back here!

Bite your damn d*ck off!

Bring it on, baby!

Let's see who you really are.

(spits)

(elevator dings)

Can I help you?

Excuse me.

Is there a problem?

Yeah, there's a problem.

That skank up in my room tried to k*ll me.

Skank? You'll have to be more specific.

You know, that nut job up at the bar pretending to be Aileen Wuornos.

She's leaving here in cuffs.

Yeah, I wouldn't bother with that call you're trying to make.

Even if you got through, dollars to doughnuts, you won't find anyone in your room.

Mr. March is very protective of his invited guests.

Mr. March?

James Patrick March?

The very same.

His annual Devil's Night soiree is the event of the season.

What the hell is Devil's Night?

Oh, sweetie.

Devil's Night is the real holiday around here.

Halloween, that's plastic pumpkins and paper costumes, but Devil's Night... is when the real ghouls come out to play.

A night of mischievous criminal behavior, which is why every year at this time, Mr. March holds his annual dinner event.

The guest list is tres exclusive.

(gasps)

Well, that's unusual.

Now, how did I miss this?

Lucky you.

You've been invited.

♪
♪

(music grows louder)

Man: The key to a really good subfloor is containing the moisture below the floor.

See, you need to make sure that there's a-a... a layer.

Like...

Hey, John.

Hey, listen, I-I want to apologize for what happened, man.

I wasn't mad at you, it's just... it's just cops in general.

Men in general, right? (laughs)

Hey, hey, come sit next to me.

Between you and me, you don't want to sit next to Jeff or John.

They like 'em young and cute, like you. (laughs)

Just keep your distance.

Aw...

Enjoy your last night of freedom.

You're leaving here in my custody.

Aileen: Hey, come on.

I'm sorry about what happened, man.

Just sit... you sit here.

No, Aileen.

John will sit where his name card is.

(groans)

You know we like to do things formally around here.

Hey, suck my left tit, Clark Gable.

Ah, we're all here now.

Let's sit-- only so many hours in the night.

John, you're by the other John.

John, you're here.

Ricky, here.

Ah...

Absinthe.

Our customary libation.

To our special night and our new guest.

(coughs, laughs)

(Aileen whoops)

What is this?

Who are you?

I'm March, I built this hotel.

The man who built this hotel d*ed more than 85 years ago.

This is my problem with police officers.

All you care about is evidence.

Evidence, evidence, evidence.

Until that evidence no longer fits the narrative you need to be true, at which point the evidence becomes an illusion, a mistake.

A trick.

You've lived in my hotel long enough, John, seen enough evidence to know that what is impossible becomes very possible here.

You're late!

Ramirez: Too busy writing letters.

(Aileen laughs)

Ramirez: I don't get you, man.

The real fun starts after you get caught.

Don't you know that?

And giving yourself your own nickname?

Not cool, dude.

It's not cool.

Now, let's all introduce ourselves.

I'm John too, John Gacy.

I'm from Norwood Park, Illinois.

I own PDM Contractors.

Uh, PDM stands for Painting, Decorating, Maintenance.

And I'm also a member of the Moose Club.

I mean, just because you got 30 bodies buried in your crawl space don't mean you can't have a really terrific rec room and be a respectable business man.

Uh, my turn?

Okay.

I'm, uh, Jeffrey Dahmer.

From Milwaukee.

Aileen: Oh, John, I think he likes you.

(laughing): And that is bad news for you.

That's how he picks 'em.

He finds the hottest guy in the room and the next thing... (clicks tongue)

(Aileen laughs)

Aileen: No.

All right.

Zodiac, they never caught you but I assume you'd be dead by now.

Dickheads like you don't just retire from being assholes.

Gacy, you were k*lled by lethal injection over 25 years ago.

Dahmer, you were m*rder*d in prison.

Deservedly.

Aileen Wuornos, put to death in 2002 in Florida.

And I know you, 'cause you're from my hometown.

Richard Ramirez, the Night Stalker.

You just d*ed of cancer in your cell a few years back.

What is this?

Some kind of Halloween trick?

What, are you actors?

I invited you here tonight to help you, John.

I've watched you, and it makes me sad.

Because greatness is about vision.

And you have made yourself blind to everything but what your eyes can see.

You need to listen to this dude, John.

He... is the master.

I mean, he taught us all.

He's a genius, like Galileo or Peter Frampton.

Gacy: That's why we come here every Devil's Night.

It's, uh, like a tradition.

It's a real honor to be invited.

Only the ones of us who really took the master's advice gets an invite.

Do you know why it took so long for the little piggies to catch me?

Because one night I stumbled into this place, and I spent a few nights, and the master, he came into my room, and he b*at the crap out of me, eh?

And he told me that if I wanted to be a volume operation that I needed to be indiscriminate-- k*ll anyone.

Your pattern needs to be no pattern.

Guess I was out sick that day. (laughs)

It's not funny, Gacy!

We are the Mount Rushmore of m*rder.

We have reputations, codes of conduct.

I've told you how many times?

Leave no evidence.

Gacy: I covered 'em all with lye.

It's not my fault that the cop who used my bathroom was very familiar with the smell of rotting bodies.

I told them-- it was my Lhasa apso who piddled on the kitchen floor, but they didn't believe me.

m*rder is one part perspiration, ten parts preparation.

Mmm.

I built this hotel for the sole purpose of hiding the evidence.

All of my chutes and ladders, have you seen them yet, John?

Miracles of modern engineering.

Mr. Gacy here came to the Hotel Cortez when he was just a young man.

18 or 19.

I was living in Vegas, and I wanted to see the Pacific, so I got in the old Buick and drove out for the weekend and stayed here-- six bucks a night.

I showed him my secrets, he was good, very good.

But imagine what he could have accomplished had he really listened to me.

33 bodies.

He could have had 333.

Gacy: Huh? That's my trick.

The handcuffs.

Once I have them cuffed, it's pretty much all over.

March: No need to worry, John.

It's the absinthe, dear boy.

When I was 19, trucker picked me up hitchhiking.

And that was before I knew how to take care of myself.

That d*ck cheese drove me all the way to L.A.

Bought me In-N-Out.

Tossed me to the curb.

It wasn't until I stumbled into this place... and met the master that I knew, I knew I was really worth something.

It's the first man that ever treated me with respect.

Jeffrey?

You're even more quiet than usual tonight.

I'm just hungry.

Ah, Ms. Evers.

It's always a delight.

Ladies first.

Please.

I don't eat salad.

Aileen: Jeffrey likes dark meat!

(laughter)

Miss Evers, bring out the amuse-bouche now, would you?

♪

Ah.

♪ Wouldn't turn around and break it ♪

Thank you, John.

♪ And anyone who's ever played a part ♪
♪ Wouldn't turn around and hate it ♪
♪ Sweet Jane ♪

March: See, Jeffrey?

Don't I always take care of you?

♪ Sweet Jane ♪

Don't I?

Oh, I'll help you there, boy.

♪ Oh, sweet, sweet Jane ♪

Please don't ever leave me.

I'll get my drill.

No!

No, no...

♪ Waiting down ♪
♪ On the corner ♪

See, I want to control them.

I want to make them mine.

Make them part of me.

I want to make them a part of me.

Never freaking works though.

They always die, like, ten minutes later.

March: Oh, poor, sweet Jeffrey.

When we met he was on a detour on his way back to Ohio from Miami where he ended up after being kicked out of the Army.

I told him if you want to be a great k*ller, you must understand people.

To hunt them, you must be able to get into their minds.

I didn't think he would take it literally.

I listened to you about burning the flesh off the bones with acid.

Yes you did, dear, yes you did.

♪ Oh, sweet Jane ♪

I said stop!

(whoops)

Nice sh*t, copper.

Don't you get that we're already dead?

♪ La, la, la, la, la-la-la ♪
♪ La, la, la, la-la-la ♪
♪ Sweet Jane... ♪

(indistinct chatter, laughter)

You think they'll grow up to be p*rn stars or strippers?

My money's on stripping.

It's free drinks.

Those girls?

They'll end up choking on their own vomit before they hit 25.

Halloween.

It's for losers.

Grown adults acting like fools.

Playing pretend.

I like my life.

I got a job that flies me business class to L.A.

Puts me up at the Bonaventure.

(laughing)

I don't need a Batman costume to have some fun.

And what's your idea of fun?

Whatever you're selling.

You should both be dead.

Oh, no, he's not dead.

He's the undead.

I made him a zombie when I poured acid in his brain.

You're not gonna run away from me anymore.

I'm yours forever, Jeffrey.

(grunting)

This, this isn't happening!

I'm afraid we've lost our detective.

I thought he would appreciate this dark evil, given the line of work he's in.

But John is clearly not yet our kind.

Forget him. I want to drink.

To the master!

Ah, thank you.

Thank you all for being here on Devil's Night, but it is I who should be the one celebrating you.

I look around and I see the definition of American success.

They write books about you.

Make movies of your life.

Johnny Depp likes my paintings!

Years after your death, people continue to be enthralled.

You've made your mark in history.

Like the Iliad, your stories will live on forever.

I consider you all my equals.

Nothing would please me more if you could stay and join me for dessert.

(all cheering, clamoring)

Dessert, almost forgot.

I'm gonna go put on my makeup.

Marsh: Ah.

He's flying on an eight ball of China White.

This will buy me a year of being left alone, right?

As always.

♪

To us, the greatest K*llers of our time.

This sacrifice bonds us together.

For eternity.

(humming a tune)

Pardon.

(yells)

(K*llers clamoring)

No! No!

No!

John?

No! No!

John! John! John! John!

John, what are you doing?

What are you doing?

I need to help him!

Help who?

The man you brought in for them to k*ll!

(shushing)

There's nobody here, John.

I don't understand.

I came in the room and you were alone.

Crying.

Have you been drinking?

A little... at the bar.

And they gave me absinthe.

Oh, well, that explains everything.

You chased alcohol with worm wood, John.

You're hallucinating.

Is anything real?

(K*llers clamoring)

I am.

You have to trust me.

I'm your protector.

You disappeared on me last time.

Oh.

I'm not going anywhere.

Come on.

Let's get you back to your room.

♪

Countess: The transition will not be easy.

Birth is a painful process.

As a mother, you know this.

Please.

I can't lose my boy again.

You must surrender completely.

And allow yourself to be ripped apart.

Ravaged.

You will feel like you are dying.

And maybe you are.

But from blood comes life.

Better.

Stronger.

More glorious than you could've ever imagined.

And you will rise.

And be reunited with your child.

For all of eternity.

(gasps)