02x05 - No Room at the Inn

Episode transcripts for the TV show "The Leftovers". Aired: June 2014 to June 2017.*
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Revolves around mysterious disappearances, world-wide, and specifically follows a group of people who are left behind in the suburban community of Mapleton. They must begin to rebuild their lives after the loss of more than 100 people.
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02x05 - No Room at the Inn

Post by bunniefuu »

[music playing]

[whispers] Good morning, sweetheart.

[splashing]

♪ There's a reason ♪
♪ For the sun-shiny sky ♪
♪ And there's a reason ♪
♪ Why I'm feeling so high ♪
♪ Must be the season ♪
♪ When that love light shines ♪
♪ All around us ♪
♪ So let that feeling ♪
♪ Grab you deep inside ♪
♪ Send you reeling ♪
♪ Where your love can't hide ♪
♪ And then go stealing ♪
♪ Through the moonlit nights ♪
♪ With your lover ♪
♪ Just let your love flow ♪
♪ Like a mountain stream ♪
♪ And let your love grow ♪
♪ With the smallest of dreams ♪
♪ And let your love show ♪
♪ And you'll know what I mean ♪
♪ It's the season ♪
♪ Let your love fly ♪
♪ Like a bird on the wing ♪
♪ And let your love bind you ♪
♪ To all living things ♪
♪ And let your love shine ♪
♪ And you'll know what I mean ♪
♪ That's the reason ♪
♪ There's a reason ♪
♪ For the warm sweet nights ♪
♪ And there's a reason ♪
♪ For the candle lights ♪
♪ Must be the season ♪
♪ When those love rites shine ♪
♪ All around us ♪
♪ So let that wonder ♪
♪ Take you into space ♪
♪ And lay you under ♪
♪ Its loving embrace ♪
♪ Just feel the thunder ♪
♪ As it warms your face ♪
♪ You can't hold back... ♪

[crickets chirping]


Good night. I love you.

[sighs]

[music playing]

Good morning, sweetheart.

♪ There's a reason ♪
♪ For the sun-shiny sky ♪ ♪ And there's a reason ♪
♪ Why I'm feeling so high ♪
♪ Must be the season ♪
♪ When that love light shines ♪
♪ All around us ♪
♪ So let that feeling ♪
♪ Grab you deep inside ♪
♪ Send you reeling ♪
♪ Where your love can't hide ♪
♪ And then go stealing ♪
♪ Through the moonlit nights... ♪

[crickets chirping]


Good night. I love you.

[music playing]

♪ There's a reason ♪
♪ For the sun-shiny sky ♪
♪ And there's a reason ♪
♪ Why I'm feeling so high ♪
♪ Must be the season ♪
♪ When that love light shines ♪
♪ All around us ♪
♪ So let that feeling ♪
♪ Grab you deep inside ♪
♪ Send you reeling ♪
♪ Where your love can't hide ♪
♪ And then go stealing ♪
♪ Through the moonlit nights with your lover... ♪

[keyboard clicks]


Good night. I love you.

[sighs]

Mary?

Mary, please look at me.

I don't get--

I can't understand why you came back and went away again.

Why would you?

I'm doing it all exactly the same way it was that day.

The same song, the same places-- the church, the supermarket-- the same fruit in your shake, the same burrito, but it isn't working.

I know it was this place.

It was the first night we were here and I know it was this place because you woke up, Mary.

We spoke.

And we laughed.

And we...

For three hours you were awake and I don't know why you went back to sleep.

Is it a test?

Can you look at me?

Just give a small sign that you're here.

Oh, this isn't fair.

You can't give that to me and take it away again.

So you-- you need to look at me now, Mary, okay?

Look at me.

Look at me!

[music playing]

♪ Everybody is wondering ♪
♪ What and where they all came from ♪
♪ Everybody is worrying about where they're gonna go ♪
♪ When the whole thing's done ♪
♪ But no one knows for certain ♪
♪ And so it's all the same to me ♪
♪ Think I'll just let the mystery be ♪
♪ Some say once gone, you're gone forever ♪
♪ And some say you're gonna come back ♪
♪ Some say you rest in the arms of the Savior ♪
♪ If in sinful ways you lack ♪
♪ Some say that they're coming back in a garden ♪
♪ Bunch of carrots and little sweet peas ♪
♪ Think I'll just let the mystery be ♪
♪ Everybody is wondering ♪
♪ What and where they all came from ♪
♪ Everybody is worrying about where they're gonna go ♪
♪ When the whole thing's done ♪
♪ But no one knows for certain ♪
♪ So it's all the same to me ♪
♪ Think I'll just let the mystery be ♪
♪ Think I'll just let the mystery be. ♪


Please pull over to the waiting area.

Visitors coming through.

We'll let you all through in five minutes.

Please pull over to the waiting area.

Excuse-- excuse me, sir.

My wife has an appointment. We need to--

We'll let you go as soon as we can, sir.

[horns honking]

Man: Let's go!


Ranger: Please pull over. Visitors coming through.

[ranger radio chatter]

[whistle blowing]

Please pull over. Visitors coming through.


Think they could invest in a bigger bridge, huh?

Ranger #2: Come on in.

Ranger: Visitors coming through.

That's true, Matt, but then the town would lose its authenticity.

[alarm blaring]

[radio chatter]

[whistle blowing]


What's happening?

Get back in your car, sir.

Can I--

We have runners. We have runners.

[grunts]

[siren wails]

[grunting]

Go, baby, go!

[stun g*n crackling]

Hey!


[groaning]

[groaning, struggling continue]

[horns honking]


Tech: Any allergies?

No allergies, but she has an adverse reaction to amoxicillin.

And the reason for the scan?

I was hoping to find out if there's been any improvement in brain function.

Anything in her behavior to suggest a change?

Um, I'd just like to compare her results to her last scan, please.

You can send them to our doctor in New York.

You got it.

Can you tell me how much the co-pay is?

You'd have to talk to billing.

Will she feel it?

I don't know.

[machine knocking]

Sir, personnel only once the scan starts.

Someone will come get you when she's through.

Yeah, okay.

[urinating]

[phone ringing] ♪ Hallelujah ♪

♪ Hallelujah... ♪

Oh, oh!

Oh, sh*t! sh*t!

[sighs] f*ck!

[door opens]

Mr. Jamison!


Would you mind coming back inside?

Why?

We'd like to discuss the results.

I told you to send the results to our doctor.

I'm not paying for any more--

There's no charge, sir.

But if you could please just come on back in.

It's important.

[door opens]


Mr. Jamison.

Charlie Sampson. How are y'all today?

I'm good, thanks.

Sorry, are you a doctor?

No, sir, I am not.

If you wouldn't mind taking a look at this and signing it, y'all can be on your way.

Waiver of liability?

I don't... Sorry, I don't... they said this was about Mary's results.

Is there a problem?

Yes, sir, there is.

You failed to disclose your wife's condition.

If you had, we would have never administered the contrast dye.

I told you about her condition.

I answered all the nurse's questions.

You told us she was in a persistent vegetative state.

You did not tell us that she was pregnant.

Our blood draw showed HCG levels well over 1,000.

We couldn't have children.

I never thought that-- you're pregnant?

Well, congratulations.

Now if you'll please just sign the release.

What is this?

It indemnifies the imaging center in the event that the pregnancy is no longer viable.

Why wouldn't it be viable?

Because your wife is a 40-year-old woman in what amounts to a coma.

You're looking at close to a 90% chance of her miscarrying.

That's why we ask for consent before we administer an MRI.

But our tech did not ask for it in this case, sir, because your wife is not capable of giving consent.


And if she's not capable of giving her consent for a test, she cannot give her consent for anything.

You take my meaning?

No.

She was awake.

She was awake when we--

I would never do that.

Of course you wouldn't.

Just like you wouldn't want to have to say that under oath if you didn't have to.

Now please sign the release.

I want my co-pay back.

[Matt laughs] I knew it!

10 years we tried. 10 years and nothing.

And in one night... one night!

It's that place.

That's why you woke up, isn't it?

So this could happen.

Don't you worry about that 90% business.

Once we're back across that bridge, you'll be fine.

You and the baby.

You and the baby.

Oh, poor guy.

[blinker ticking]

Hey there. You okay?

I've been better.

Anything I can do to help?

Yeah. Just conked out on me.

I think it might be the radiator.

Well, I tried to call for a tow, but there's no reception out here.

Well, let me try.

Dropped it in the toilet.

I've lost two that way.

Well, we're just a couple of miles out of town.

I can give you a ride.

Is that your wristband?

You live there?

In Miracle?

Yes.

Me and my wife Mary.

She okay?

Getting better all the time.

Oh, hey.

What's your name?

Is that your son? [groans]

I'm sorry.

[groans]

We-we have to get in. Get his wristband, son.

Man: Careful, don't rip it.

I can't get it off.

Stand over here, God damn it.

[cracks]

[screaming]

We have to get in.

[Matt groans]

All right, come on. Door, get in.

[car door opens]

[car door closes]


Woman: Matt.

Matt, we have to hurry.

You have to get us back in.

Mary?

He won't last out here.

[groans] I'm gonna lose the baby, Matt.

Please, honey.

Get us back in.

I will.

[winces]

Mary?

It's okay, honey.

I heard you.

We'll go right now.

No.

No!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

God damn it!

Hey!

[music playing]

[men singing in Spanish]


Don't worry, sweetheart. I heard you.

We're almost home.

Almost home.

Hey!

Friend.

Where are you coming in from?

sh*t, are you hurt?

Do you want to get in?

I know all the ways.

Back door, my friend.

How much money you got?

We live here.

Oh.

Well, a thousand pardons, sir.

Almost home, sweetheart.

"Now climbeth Tamora Olympus' top.

Safe out of fortune's sh*t."

[ranger radio chatter]

Hello. Excuse me.

This access is for park personnel only.

I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to return to camp.

We live in the park. We were att*cked, me and my wife.

A man and his son, they were in a red car.

Would you like to report this to the local sheriff's office, sir?

I'd like to report it to you.

Sorry, but we got no jurisdiction if you're not in the park.

We live in the park. Please just let us in so I can get my wife home.

The longer she's...

I cannot let you cross without a valid ID, reservation, or a wristband.

They stole our wristbands.

[sighs] We live on Scarborough Street.

I work at the Sacred Mission with Reverend Massey.

We shop at the Safeway on Amarillo.

We attend the Jarden Community Pool every Sunday and Wednesday.

My sister just moved here, but I haven't memorized her number and my phone fell in a toilet.

Please.

We live here.

Y'all need to go to the visitors' center, get yourselves some replacement bands, okay?

Yes, sir.

Yeah, thank you.

[chain rattles]

God bless you.

He does every day.

Recording: The visitor wristband is your ticket into Miracle.

Visitors must wear their wristband at all times.

Spell your name again for me.

J-A-M-I-S-O-N.

Is this gonna take much longer? We got a wedding in town.

You said it was a sanctuary pass?

Yes, Reverend Massey sponsored us of Sacred Mission.

My sister just moved here. Could she sponsor us?

What's her name?

Nora Durst.

Durst.

Excuse me. Can you help us?

Could you just wait a minute?

[line ringing]

May I?


Kevin: Hello?

Kevin?

Oh, thank God. Um, Mary and I-- they won't let us back into town.

We're at the visitors' center.

Our wristbands were stolen...

Jesus Christ, man. Step aside.

...and now they won't give us any new ones.

I'm on the phone.

I don't care.

Sir, unless they've been here for six months, I can't help you.

Now, you hear that? She can't help you. Now step aside, man.

Please, will you mind your own business?

No, I did my business. I've got my documents.

And you don't. So why don't you just roll her on out of here 'cause she doesn't look like she's in a rush to get anywhere.

Oh, you've got your documents.

That's right.

You've got your documents.

Yes.

[papers crunch]

Let's see them, huh?


Recording: Welcome to Miracle National Park...

She pretending?

No, she's not pretending.

He will die.

What?

She says if you don't get her back inside, he will die.

Who?

[door opens]

Ranger: Matt and Mary Jamison.


Jesus, Matt. Are you okay?

Yeah.

Thank you.

You zip-tied him?

Man got a busted hand. Works at the church.

What, you scared he gonna baptize you or something?

Give me the clippers.

This is John. He's gonna help you and Mary.

Yes, we met.

Mm-hmm.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

You should get it looked at in case it needs to be set.

Erika will take care of him once we get back into town.

My wife's a doctor.

I'll be fine. Thank you.

I'm sorry about your daughter.

I've been handing out fliers at the church.

Appreciate it.

Try to keep it elevated.

I always do.

I wish I could say this never happens, but every man for himself out there.

It can get rough.

What were y'all doing in Austin?

Just getting a test, a scan for Mary.

Everything okay?

Yes, thank you.

We do it every six months or so to see if there's been any change in her condition.

Was there?

Sorry?

Any change in her condition.

N-no.

Except for the pregnant part.

What?

You-- you went through Mary's bag?

It fell out. One of the rangers picked it up.

Matt, what's he talking about?

Please, this is very complicated.

It is complicated.

Yes, and we... They said the pregnancy is high risk, so the longer we're out here--

I need to get Mary back into town now.

John: Why?

What?

Why do you need to get Mary back into town now?

John, he's been att*cked.

Yeah, and I'm trying to help, but I'm not getting the whole story.

Did she wake up?

You brought her here, all the way to Miracle, Texas, and she woke up, right?

And while she was awake, you made love.

And then, sh*t, she went right back to this.

That the story you gonna tell?

The only story you can tell?

'Cause it's not true.

Because that doesn't happen here.

People don't get healed.

My wife lost her hearing a long time ago and it's still lost.

So, what, God likes your wife better than mine?

Your friend Kevin here asked me to help you out.

I owe him, so I will.

But you got to tell me the truth.

The truth?

In about five months when your wife starts to show and everybody knows she's pregnant, you need to say that you were sad and lonely and confused.

And that you are very sorry for what you did because you knew it was wrong.

Jesus, John...

That's the truth.

Right?

Yes.

She never woke up.

She never woke up.

Okay.

Well, let's get you home.

What happened to you?

Excuse me?

I know your daughter is missing and that's terrible, I'm sorry, but you were like this before that.

You're angry at this place.

What happened to you?

You know what?

I don't think I'm gonna be able to get those wristbands after all.

Kevin: Hey, come on. Hey, John. Hey!

[door opens]

What the f*ck was that, Matt?

How much money do you have?

What?

I'm gonna need money. How much do you have?

Me and Nora are gonna talk...

Now, Kevin.

I need to get her back now.

Okay, okay.

I got that. Thank you.

Get her on the bridge.

Matt: I've got her.

Ranger: Coming through.

Matt: We'll be fine, Kevin.

[chains rattle]

[crowd chattering]


I'll get us back in.

You'll be fine.

You and the baby.

[drumming]

Matt: Excuse me, um...


Excuse me.

[fiddle playing]

Excuse me, ladies.

I'm looking for a tall man with a samurai bun.

Excuse me, gentlemen...

Man: Look at him. Look what he did.

Man #2: You b*at that little grubworm of yours?

Hey, what you looking at?

Suck on that!

[man grunts] Punk!

[laughs]


Woman: You want to free him?

What?

Do you want to free him?

Man: Look over here!

Yes, of course.

Then take his place.

Crowd: Yeah! Go!

Get up there.

Yeah!

Yeah, I didn't think so.

[clamoring continues]

Woman: Yeah, get up there.

Hey!

[men grunting]

[blows thudding]


Y'all okay?

Yes, thanks.

I'm looking for a tall man with a samurai bun on his head.

Swedish guy?

Yes, I think so.

Name's Elmer or something.

Trailer, big green stripe.

Thank you, sir.

Yep.

[music blaring on radio]

♪ I'm out of the picture, slipped out of the frame ♪
♪ I need a Prozac, pick me up, I'm out of my brain ♪
♪ I got my wrists cut, stitch me up, I'm loving the pain ♪
♪ Masochistic, P1, I f*ck the insane ♪
♪ I'm on a cocaine comedown ♪
♪ Twitching in bed with all these f*cked up thoughts ♪
♪ Turning up in my head, blood stained red... ♪


Elmer?

Elmer?

♪ I never felt so alive ♪
♪ 10 minutes left to live and it's a quarter to 5:00... ♪


Elmer?

Man: Not Elmer, Almer.

What?

Almer. f*cking Almer!

I need your help to get in.

Hey.

Friend, how much money you got?

How much does it cost for me and my wife?

Can she get out of the chair?

No.

Uh... 1,000.

Okay, I have about just over 400 here.

I'll get you the rest when we're in town.

Come on, friend.

You want fair deal, 1,000.

No, I live there. I can pay you back, I promise.

Friend, I'm not going anywhere.

Come find me when you have the money.

No, it has to be now. We have to go now.

My wife is pregnant.

She needs care.

She's pregnant?

Can you help me? Almer, please.

Yes.

[sighs]

For 1,000.

♪ I'm so Manc, I bleed lager and cigs... ♪

[door closes]


It's all right.

It's all right. I'll find a way.

He'll show us a way.

Please.

[music playing]

♪ When the moonlight turns the ocean ♪
♪ Blue to silver ♪
♪ In my dream ship I'll come drifting ♪
♪ Home to you ♪
♪ Though I spend... ♪


Matt: Excuse me, ma'am.

Is this your cross?


Yes, sir.

I'm Reverend Matthew Jamison. This is my wife Mary.

Sandy.

Sandy. I'm sorry to bother you.

May I have a moment of your time?

I have a friend I met doing some missionary work years ago.

He preaches at a small church across the bridge there.

And he's been trying for years to get me to come out and visit him, so I decided to take my friend up on his offer and come here to Jarden.

The plan was to stay for about a week.

We've been here for three months now.

How?

Religious exemption.

They gave Mary and I wristbands that said sanctuary on them.

This morning a man att*cked us and took those wristbands and now they will not let us back in.

Sandy, I'm asking for your help.

I'm calling upon your sense of community and charity.

Mary and I need some money so that I can--

How much?

$500.

I know that's an extraordinary amount of money, but I give you my word as a Christian I will pay you back.

What denomination?

20s. It's whatever you can--

No, no, you're a reverend. What denomination?

Episcopalian.

Why?

My father was a reverend, I was raised in the faith, but I welcome all beliefs into my church.

Where'd you go to seminary?

Berkeley Divinity.

Where's that?

Connecticut.

What's your favorite book?

Of the Bible. You got a favorite book?

Job.

What's his wife's name?

She isn't named.

And she speaks only once.

"Does thou still retain thine integrity?

Curse God and die."

Wait right here.

Good thing I didn't say Lutheran.

♪ In my dream ship I'll come drifting ♪
♪ Home to you. ♪


This is Reggie.

Hello.

I'm Matt Jamison. This is my wife Mary.

You'll do it?

I haven't asked him yet.

Do what?

You want $500?

Yes.

Okay.

You got to hit him just once, but as hard as you can with this.

And he has to say it.

Yeah, when you hit him, you got to say Brian.

Who's Brian?

What the f*ck do you care?

I don't understand why you want me to do this.

Look, you're a bona fide man of God.

If you do this, it counts.

You're a man of God, right?

Yes.

Well, you want your f*cking money or not?

Go on, shoo, you sick fucks. Go on.

Come on, hit him hard.

And say Brian.

I want my money first.

You get paid when you do your job. Hit him hard.

Crowd: Hit him! Hit him!

Go.

Go on, hit him. Come on.

Man: Hit him!

Crowd: Hit him! Hit him!

Hit him like you mean it.

Hit him!

Come on, no.

Matt: What?

No. Hit him hard.

That's as hard as I can.

Come on, you're holding back.

He didn't say it.

I can't, my thumb.

You're holding back.

I did not.

Bullshit.

[crowd shouting]

No.

Why won't he say it?

Come on, hit him harder.

What? I hit him.

No, not hard, not hard enough.

We had an agreement.

We had an agreement that you'd hit as hard as you could.

He's not gonna do it.

Honey, you want a sh*t at it?

I bet you can hit harder.

Want to get out here and swing? Come on.

[crowd jeering]

Sandy: Go, hard.

Why won't he say it?

[crowd shouting]


He's not gonna do it.

[shouting continues]

Brian!

Was that hard enough or do I need another oar?

[banjo music playing]

You are short $60.

Okay, my friend.

We are good to go.

Are you claustrophobic?

[thunder rumbles]

Am I what?

[thunder rumbles]


How far?

Just a couple minutes.

There's a gate on the other end.

Sometimes they lock with chain.

Here.

You're not coming?

You pay for me to show you, not to hold your hand, friend.

Come find me when they throw you out again.

[thunderclap]

What do you think, Mary?

[thunderclap]

Lighten our darkness, we beseech Thee, O Lord; and by Thy great mercy defend us from all perils and dangers of this night.

For the love of Thy only son, our Savior, Jesus Christ.

Amen.

Well, at least we're out of the rain.

All that money for pointing us to a drain and a pair of bolt cutters.

Damn it!

[clanking]

We'll need... I need to...

Okay, I got it.

I got it.

[clanking continues]

Yes!

Oh, don't worry, Mary. I-I've cut it.

I just had to...

[grunting, groaning]

♪ When that love light shines ♪
♪ All around us... ♪

[grunting] Yes! God!

Holy sh*t. Ah!

No, no, no, no!

Why?!

♪ Where your love can't hide ♪

I've got you! I've got...

♪ And then go stealing ♪
♪ Through the moonlit nights ♪
♪ With your lover... ♪


[Matt screaming]

♪ Just let your love flow ♪
♪ Like a mountain stream ♪
♪ And let your love grow ♪
♪ With the smallest of dreams... ♪


Mary.

♪ And let your love show ♪
♪ And you'll know what I mean ♪
♪ It's the season ♪
♪ Let your love fly ♪
♪ Like a bird on the wing ♪
♪ And let your love bind you ♪
♪ To all living things ♪
♪ And let your love shine... ♪


I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

[knocks]

[shoutingFarsi]

We'll leave when it stops raining.

Get the f*ck out!

Now!

[thunder rumbling]


Nora: Matt!

Matt Jamison!

Matt Jamison!


Matt!

Nora?

Hey.

Are you okay?

Yeah.

Where's her chair?

We lost it.

Thanks for coming.

We pushed out the back seat a little for air.

Get in.

They're searching trunks.

They won't search ours.

[sirens wailing]


What's happening?

There was an anonymous tip that those missing girls were spotted out here in the encampment.

You?

It was anonymous, Matt. Now get in the trunk.

There.

We good?

Let them through. Here comes the truck.

All right, let's go. Forget it.

Move it.

Remember that train in Frankfurt?

You and me crammed into a single sleeper berth.

I had to hold you so you wouldn't fall out.

You thought it was romantic.

"Do Yeats," you said. [chuckles]

And I said, "I only did Yeats to get you to fall in love with me. I don't need poetry anymore."

And you said, "You still need it."

[chuckles]

"Though I am old with wandering Through hollow lands and hilly lands, I will find out where she has gone... And kiss her lips and take her hands, And walk among long dappled grass, And pluck till time and times are done... The silver apples of the moon, The golden apples of the su--"

[brakes squeal]

[footsteps]

[Nora grunts]

Sir?

[car door closes]

[car door opens, closes]


There's an accident.

God damn goats.

[goat bleats]

He's dead.

We have to go. Help me.

[goats bleating]

It's mine.

What are you doing?

Will you take care of her?

What are you talking about? We have to get back in the car.

I shouldn't have to hide, Nora.

Will you take care of her just for a little while?

God damn it, Matt. Seriously?

Please?

What's going on?

Where are you gonna be?

Not far.

I love you. Good night.

Kevin: What happened?

Nora: He's not coming with us. Get in the car.


[engine starts]

Who the f*ck is that?

My wife woke up the first night we arrived in your town.

It's the only time in over three years she's talked to me.

And there may be no way to prove it, but it happened and I won't ever say it didn't.

I don't want your wristband.

Mary found hers, so she's back where she belongs and I have no doubt that she'll wake up again soon.

And when she does, I'm going to come back and you and I will have a talk.

This boy needs help.

His father's dead.

♪ No one laughs at God in a hospital ♪
♪ No one laughs at God in a w*r ♪
♪ No one's laughing at God when they're starving ♪
♪ Or freezing or so very poor ♪
♪ No one laughs at God when a doctor calls ♪
♪ After some routine tests ♪
♪ No one's laughing at God when it's gotten real late ♪
♪ And their kid's not back from that party yet ♪
♪ No one laughs at God when their airplane ♪
♪ Starts to uncontrollably shake ♪
♪ No one's laughing at God when they see the one they love ♪
♪ Hand in hand with someone else and they hope that they're mistaken ♪
♪ No one laughs at God when the cops knock on their door ♪
♪ And they say we've got some bad news, sir ♪
♪ No one's laughing at God when there's a famine, fire or flood ♪
♪ But God can be funny ♪
♪ At a cocktail party while listening to a good God-themed joke ♪
♪ Or when the crazies say He hates us ♪
♪ And they get so red in the head you think they're about to choke ♪
♪ God can be funny ♪
♪ When told He'll give you money if you just pray the right way ♪
♪ And when presented like a genie who does magic like Houdini ♪
♪ Or grants wishes like Jiminy Cricket and Santa Claus ♪
♪ God can be so hilarious ♪
♪ Ha ha ♪
♪ Ha ha... ♪


Okay.

Okay what?

I want to free him.

Why?

Because it's my turn.

♪ But God can be funny ♪
♪ At a cocktail party while listening to a good God-themed joke ♪
♪ Or when the craziesay He hates us ♪
♪ And they get so red in the head you think they're about to choke... ♪

[crowd cheering]

♪ God can be funny ♪
♪ When told He'll give you money if you just pray the right way ♪
♪ And when presented like a genie who does magic like Houdini ♪
♪ Or grants wishes like Jiminy Cricket and Santa Claus ♪
♪ God can be so hilarious ♪
♪ No one laughs at God in a hospital ♪
♪ No one laughs at God in a w*r ♪
♪ No one laughs at God in a hospital ♪
♪ No one laughs at God in a w*r ♪
♪ No one laughing at God in a hospital ♪
♪ No one's laughing at God in a w*r ♪ ♪ No one's laughing at God when they're starving ♪
♪ Or freezing or so very poor ♪
♪ No one's laughing at God ♪
♪ No one's laughing at God ♪
♪ No one's laughing at God ♪
♪ We're all laughing with God. ♪

[music playing]

♪ I've been reading Revelations, about things to be ♪
♪ Where John was writing down the things he'd seen ♪
♪ He wrote of a place that you put down sin ♪
♪ With thanks to God when you live again ♪
♪ 'Cause it's gonna be peace right here on Earth ♪
♪ For God is now setting up His church ♪
♪ Teaching His saints what they should know ♪
♪ For the mission is the kingdom where they shall go ♪
♪ 'Cause it's gonna be peace right here on Earth ♪
♪ For God is now setting up His church ♪
♪ Teaching His saints what they should know ♪
♪ For the mission is the kingdom where they shall go. ♪
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