01x01 - Pilot

Episode transcripts for the 2015 TV show "Agent X". Aired: November 2015 to December 2015*
Watch/Buy Amazon


"Agent X" is the code name for a special agent, who is trained and ready to serve, who helps protect the country in times of crisis, who handles sensitive cases that the CIA and the FBI cannot. Unknown to the President, "Agent X" can only be deployed at the careful discretion of the Vice President, who only recently becomes aware of this.
Post Reply

01x01 - Pilot

Post by bunniefuu »

[beeping]

[grunting]

♪ ♪

We know you are CIA.

Just admit it, and we will stop.

[breathing heavily]

I'm a missionary.

I'm here to spread Bibles and love.

A b*mb.

You call this "love"?

Sometimes love hurts.

[grunts] Aah!

[grunting]

[groaning]

[bones cr*ck]

[g*n cocks]

[speaks Arabic]

[silenced g*nshots]

I heard you're looking for a new job.

[panting]

[beeping]

[horns honking]

[Henry Mancini's "Peter Gunn" plays]

[elevator bell dings]

[button clicks]

[elevator bell dings]

[elevator bell dings]

♪ Every night, your line is busy ♪
♪ All that buzzing makes me dizzy ♪
♪ Dizzy, dizzy, dizzy ♪
♪ Couldn't count on all my fingers ♪
♪ All the dates you had with swingers ♪

[elevator bell dings]

[speaks German]

[elevator bell dings]

♪ Oh, my, my ♪
♪ I'm moving ♪
♪ Tomorrow I may be splitting to Britain or Norway ♪

[elevator bell dings]

[Russian accent] What's this? We didn't order room service.

This is just compliments of the house.

[screams]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[elevator bell dings]

[growls]

[grunts]

No scars. Not him.

Volker.

Nicolas Volker, where is he?

[Russian accent] I do... I do not know.

[helicopter blades whirring]

Damn it!

♪♪

[growling]

[grunting]

[hissing]

How are you still standing?!

[grunting]

[groans]

No, no!

No, no, no! No, no, no!

Where did Volker go?!

[grunts]

Oh!

Damn it.

[panting]

What's your name?

Olga. M-My name is Olga.

I come from the Novosibirsk.

[elevator bell dings]

They sold me to that man.

Did you get a good look at his face?

No. You didn't, either?

No, I was... I was improvising.

Who are you?

[powering down]

Wait.

You're lying.

Please! I do not understand.

Your perfume... Clive Christian, a little pricey for Siberian farm girls.

[gasps]

[chuckles]

[American accent] Impressive.

[grunts]

[both grunting]

Jesus!

[elevator bell dings]

[gasps]

[indistinct conversations]

[groans]

Good morning.

Man: Did you catch Volker?

No. But I'm getting closer.

Caught an associate of his with some Russian Spetsnaz training.

Tell the FBI she's ready for pickup in my trunk.

Sending a message to the Berlin legal attaché right now.

[beep]

I thought you liked being tied up.

[Olga grunting]

[muffled scream]

[screaming continues]

[engine turns over]

[engine revs]

♪♪

[beeping]

[horns honking]

♪♪

[beeping]

[beeping]

[dog barking in distance]

Doorman: Ladies and gentlemen, the Vice President of the United States.

[cheers and applause]

[fanfare plays]

Thank you. Thank you.

[beeping]

Today, Vice President Thomas Eckhart realizes his dream of becoming President of the United States.

But for many others, this day marks another dream fulfilled...

The inauguration of America's first female Vice President, Natalie Maccabee.

But here she is, just moments away from taking her oath with the eyes of the world upon her.


[beeping]

I, Natalie Kane Maccabee, do solemnly swear...

I, Natalie Kane Maccabee, do solemnly swear...

...that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic.

...that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic.


Eckhart: Natalie, congratulations. You have survived the first and the most brutal test of Office...

11 inaugural balls.

[laughter]

But listen, listen... all joking aside, surviving challenges is what Natalie here does best.

In both her public and private lives, she's overcome extraordinary difficulties.

It's also why I'm so proud,
as a former Vice President myself, to present her with this... the key to this magnificent residence.

[laughs]

[applause]

♪♪

I promise... to do my utmost to honor its legacy.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

[applause]

There's a new man in your life, Natalie.

This is Malcolm Millar.

Oh!

Chief Steward of this residence.

Now, you'll find him an invaluable asset

during your tenure here.

[laughs]

I look forward to serving you, Madam Vice President.

Oh, please, call me Nate.

I can assure you that will never happen, Madam Vice President.

[laughs]

You'll find Malcolm here a bit of a stickler when it comes to protocol.

Thank you, Mr. President.

[chuckles]

Malcolm, after you.

Actually, the Vice President always precedes the Chief Steward by at least a half step.

Oh. Okeydokey.

♪♪

[beeping]

[fire crackling]

[gasps]

[chuckling] Oh, Malcolm.

Come on in.

You caught me having one of those "how the hell did I get here" moments.

[chuckles] You ever have those?

Daily, Madam.

[chuckles]

Is there anything I can get for you before I retire?

Maybe a Latin dictionary.

Come again?

The inscription on the fireplace there...

...Lux in Tenebris.

"Light into Darkness."

Correct.

Seems like a riff on the old Freemason aphorism, "Light out of Darkness."

Isn't it?

You have a very eclectic range of knowledge.

[chuckles] My late husband, Stephen, used to say that my mind was like a vacuum cleaner.

Except when we were playing Scrabble.

I'll be right back with that dictionary.

[door closes]

[sighs]

♪♪

[sighs, chuckles]

[whirring]

♪♪

Malcolm: Well done.

Oh!

You just b*at Lyndon Johnson's record at finding the lock.

[laughs]

What exactly have I found?

The greatest secret in the history of our country.

One step behind, ma'am.

[whirring]

Tell me this is a wine cellar.

I can assure you that it's not.

To your right, ma'am.

Who in God's name built this?

Anonymous patriots.

Ours is a nation born of unknown heroes.

Ah, here we are.

The History Room?

[door creaks]

Well, shut the front door.

Yes, ma'am.

♪♪

What is this place?

A shrine of sorts... men devoted to protecting this document.

They were on the table.

Thank you.

Oh.

This is a superb copy of the Constitution.

Not a copy, ma'am. The original.

This is the only complete document containing Article II, Section Five.

Article II only has four Sections, Malcolm.

Ah.

Section Five.

"An agent of unknown identity is hereby authorized to serve at the discretion of the Vice President for the purpose of aiding the Republic in times of dire peril."

So the Vice President was some kind of crisis manager of sorts?

Didn't it always seem strange to you that the Founding Fathers gave the second-most important job in the executive branch virtually no duties?

Yeah.

Mm.

[sighs] Section Five.

So what is an agent of unknown identity?

Who, ma'am, and we've always considered Nathan Hale there to be the first.

His last words before the British hanged him for espionage have become a sort of credo for our group.

"I regret that I have but one..."

John: "I only regret that I have but one life to lose for my country."

John Case at your service, Madam Vice President.

No kiddin'?

No kiddin'.

Madam.

♪♪

So, why report to me instead of the President?

That's a great question, Malcolm.

Malcolm?

The, uh, Founding Fathers understood, ma'am, that, um, certain emergencies require the, uh...

How shall I put it?

...the judicious disregard for accepted legal formalities.

In English, the President needs plausible deniability.

Some of the Founding Fathers were lawyers, ma'am.

Okay, so how long do I have?

Come again?

How long do I have to... learn my job before I'm expected to run a mission?

You're in play now.

Uh, we will, of course, walk you through this, Madam Vice President.

Define "in play."

We have discovered a new chaos merchant on the international scene.

The recent nuclear accident in Marseilles, the unexpected rise in guerrilla warfare in Nigeria, and the su1c1de of the Argentinean Prime Minister.

Those three things have one thing in common...

Nicolas Volker.

Who's Nicolas volker?

Stanton: Nicolas Volker is the most dangerous international criminal since Carlos the Jackal.

My people have dubbed him the fatality designer, and that's exactly what he does.

So why haven't you been able to capture him yet?

He's a ghost, sir. No face. No identity.

But now, thanks to an unknown source, a key member of his network is sitting in my jail.

A former Russian spy turned private intelligence broker, Olga Yelena Petrovka.

Born Kiev, 1982, recruited as a contortionist for the Moscow Circus, 1996.

By the age of 19, Olga had already been mistress to some of Russia's most elite power players.

General Andrei Rokov, Defense Minister Evgeni Morozhin, and billionaire Anton Markov.

[thunder crashing]

[speaking Russian]

[dog whimpers]

[thunder crashes]

♪♪

Mr. President? A word.

About what?

The key, sir.

Listen, Natalie, it is gonna take some time for you to settle into your new house.

In the meantime, whatever you learn in the privacy of that home should remain private.

[indistinct conversation]

Of course.

Thank you, sir.

[sips]

[door opens]

Thorne: Natalie?!

Natalie: You wanted to see me, sir?

Have a seat, please.

Thank you.

[door closes]

I hope you like Girl Scout Cookies.

I'm practically addicted to the little mint devils.

Judge Thorne...

Have a cookie.

Okay.

Today, you approached the President regarding your new duties.

Be advised, he will never acknowledge the existence of Section Five to you.

Ever.

And you must never bring it up with him, either... no matter how desperately you may desire to do so.

President Eckhart has stepped out of the circle... as you will someday.

So... how did you find out about Section Five?

One of the privileges of being Chief Justice of the United States of America, I am protector and guardian of every statute and law that governs our Republic.

As for Section Five, it is a legal and vital part of our Constitution, designed by our forefathers to protect us in extraordinary circumstances.

Against all enemies, foreign and domestic.

Precisely.

Now you truly understand your oath and the responsibilities that you must bear alone.

And never misuse for personal gain.

We're talking patriotism, not politics.

In times of crisis, we take our hatchets, and we bury them... into the backs of our real enemies.

Sir.

Mm-hmm.
♪ ♪

[door opens]

[engine revs]

♪ ♪

[gasps] Thank God, there's a creepy guy following me!

[grunts]

[screaming]

[tires squeal]

[tires screech]

[computer chimes]

Oh, I have an E-mail from my daughter.

It's an emergency.

Probably got a "B" on her exam. [chuckles]

If I got a "B" in college, I'd frame it and send it home.

I'll see you. [scoffs]

[beep]

Missy: Daddy...

If Olga Petrovka isn't released by 3:00 A.M., they're gonna k*ll me.

[crying] And if you send anyone to rescue me, they say they'll sh**t me on the spot.

Whatever happens, I love you and Mom so much.


[beep]

♪♪

[fire crackling]

[fire crackling]

♪♪

[whimpers]

[screams]

Stephen?!

[gasps]

Apologies, ma'am.

You're needed at the White House.

♪♪

Miss Petrovka.

I'm Special Agent Pritchett.

[sighs]

[Russian accent] Thank God.

You can get me a cigarette.

You're not at the Four Seasons anymore, Olga.

And I'm not freaking room service.

But I see the pack right there... bulging in your pocket.

You deaf, Olga?

What did I just say?

I'm afraid you don't understand.

You wouldn't like me very much without a cigarette.

I get irritable.

No, you don't understand.

You belong to me now, Olga.

You smoke... when I say you smoke.

Hmm.

Now, where did your people take Missy Stanton?

The girl, Olga.

Where is the girl?

[Missy screaming]

Okay.

♪♪

[inhales sharply]

Oh, you like this, huh?

You like watching me smoke?

Actually, it's... thoroughly aggravating.

Then why are you smiling?

I know something you don't know.

Really? And what's that?

I'm double-jointed.

[grunts]

[g*ns cock]

♪♪

[sighs]

I warned him.

I get irritable.

[beeping]

[murmuring]

You see, that's exactly why I quit smoking.

Oddly enough, now I want to start.

These idiots underestimated Olga.

Everybody underestimated her. That's her edge.

She had a plan, she has accomplices.

Eckhart: Well, given the speed of this situation, Olga must have had help.

So what about local contacts?

That's my man.

You know, you trained him well.

He was a quick study.

Gray: We combed our databases, searching for persons of interest residing within the D.C. area, focusing on those who might have some sort of tie to Olga.

[computer chimes]

Our old friend, Olga's former lover, billionaire Anton Markov.

"Billionaire."

Isn't that Russian for "friend of Putin"?

Gray: We immediately tapped his cellphone, and he captured this exchange.

[men conversing in Russian]

[dial tone]

Like all good citizens, Anton has spyware detection on his cellphone, so it shut off immediately.

You checked with the Russian Ambassador?

Gray: Of course!

He claims that his cr*ck security team has scoured every inch of the Embassy... no Missy.

He's lying.

Probably, but the only way we could prove it would be to search the Embassy ourselves, and that would require...

It would require an invitation from the lying Russian Ambassador, and we might as well ask for the keys to the Kremlin while we're at it.

Clearly, the only real hope for saving my daughter in time is to hand over Olga.

Not your only hope, sir.

Edward...

Which we can never do. listen, you do not give up hope.

You never give up hope.

Come on, sir.

Eckhart: You know that everyone in this room will do whatever is in their power to get Missy back.

♪♪

We're in play.

♪♪

[whirring]

Madam Vice President.

You broke Truman's record for shortest training period.

Lucky me. Olga Petrovka is...

Well, you already know that.

Our job is to be ready when you are, ma'am.

A young girl's life is at stake, and I have no idea what I'm doing.

Like Malcolm said, we're gonna walk you through this whole thing.

Well, we better run, because Missy Stanton is dead in two hours.

[sirens wailing]

Gentlemen, what have we got?

[sirens continue]

Help! Help!

Help!

Help, help!

[sirens fade]

♪♪

[scraping]

[door opens]

[clanking]

Shut up!

[grunts, sobbing]

Natalie: You've done missions like this before.

Yes, ma'am.

And they've been successful?

Malcolm: Not always, ma'am.

Percentage of a positive outcome?

We have a 30%, 35% chance at this.

20% tops.

So what would you advise?

I'm afraid we can't answer that question, ma'am.

I get it.

This is my job.

It's my decision to make... alone.

♪♪

John...

...get the girl.

Yes, ma'am.

[sighs]

[grunts]

Shut up.

[grunting]

Shh, shh.

Really?

Natalie: Is he wearing some kind of body camera or something?

Yes, ma'am. It's a small button.

The all-seeing eye.

[Russian accent] Who are you?

I'm a friend of Missy Stanton's.

Check it out. It's a million bucks.

I'm worth quite a bit more.

Oh, I love this part.

Like watching a bug hit a speeding windshield.

It's not for you.

See, I brought it for your boy.

He works for me now.

That's my suit.

That's my Rolex! You son of a bitch!

You're not gonna need it anymore, Anton.

I will double his offer.

[Russian accent] My name... is Lev.

[John whistles]

[chuckles] He is pissed.

Get yourself dressed.

You're my invitation to the Russian Embassy.

John, there's something on his shoes.

John: What is it with women and shoes?

It says a lot about who you are and where you've been.

Looks like they're covered in concrete dust and mud.

What's Markov's business in the States?

Looks like mostly commercial real estate, business parks, hotels.

Oh, wait a minute.

We were wrong.

They didn't take Missy to the Russian Embassy... not the existing one.

She's being held at the future Embassy site.

Unfortunately, completed or not, the Russian construction site still enjoys diplomatic protection.

So... so what do we do?

Means we go ugly.

What does that mean?

Judicious disregard for accepted legal formalities.

♪♪

[buzzer in distance]

♪♪

[alarms blaring]

[indistinct shouting]

Check cell seven... Petrovka.

[shouting continues]

♪♪

[grunts]

[bones cr*ck]

Yes, yes, yes?! Just get Olga!

Where... where's Olga? Did you find her?

We don't know, sir.

[g*nsh*t]

I'll look better in black.

Strip.

[cheering]

Ah! Ha ha!

[laughing]

[speaking Russian]

[horn honking]

Yeah!

[sighs]

♪♪

[grunting]

[g*n cocks]

Good to see you again.

Shut the door.

[car door closes]

[alarm blaring]

[speaking Russian]

[beep]

[can clatters]

[cheering]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunting]

Don't.

[screams]

Stupid.

[beeping]

Come on. Come on. Come on.

You getting the feed, Malcolm?

Malcolm: Got it.

I just downloaded a back door into their security system.

We own it now.

Turning off all recording.

Erasing their hard drive. You never existed, John.

♪♪

Oh, good girl, good girl!

What's going on?

[grunts]

[screams]

[Russian accent] Your father doesn't love you.

[g*nsh*t]

[screaming]

Shh.

All right, shh, shh. I'm a friend. Okay?

You're okay.

Take a deep breath. We're gonna get you home.

Natalie: She's gonna need a ride.

John, I am sending an encrypted E-mail to St. Mary's Hospital.

Their location is two clicks from your position.

Estimated time of arrival, three minutes.

I say again, E.T.A... three mikes.

How copy?

E.T.A... three Mikes, copy that.

Where am I headed, Malcolm?

Elevator near the northeast corner.

[toilet flushes]

[g*nshots]

[Missy screaming]

[grunts]

[g*nshots]

Go!

[g*nshots]

Duck in there, duck in there!

What are you doing?

Improvising.

Seriously?

Well, plan "B" is dying. Come on.

Hold on!

Holy Toledo!

[grunting]

♪♪

[grunting]

♪♪

Aah!

[screams]

Okay, you're all right. Good job.

Go to the door... to the left.

[grunts]

[door opens]

♪♪

Almost there, almost there.

Careful. You did good.

[sirens wailing]

See that ambulance? That's for you.

You run to that.

What about you?

Forget me.

Forget you?

Yeah.

Go.

[siren continues]

John!

There's someone in the elevator.

John, Olga is in the elevator.

Malcolm: There's an inbound helo, coming, no doubt, to pick her up.

Of course there is.

♪♪

[beeping]

[helicopter blades whirring]

John: You know, Olga... you raise the definition of "high maintenance" to a whole new level.

And yet here you are.

[panting]

[grunting]

♪♪

[chuckles]

No. No, no.

Okay, fine. We try it your way.

All right.

♪♪

[chuckles]

[grunts]

[grunts]

Now my way!

[gasps]

[both grunting]

You know, Olga,

I think that we need to take a break and hurt other people for a while.

♪♪

Welcome to command.

Missy's safe. Olga's back in her cage at the FBI.

We did okay.

You know, we got to savor every victory, big and small.

[police radio chatter]

♪♪

[sobbing]

[sighs]

[sobs]

That's the good part.

Yeah.

The man who saved you, honey?

Did you get a good look at him?

No.

♪♪

[sighs]

[sighs]

[tray door slams]

[buzzing]

[beep]

[chuckles]

Nicolas, darling.

What's the next plan to get me out?

Man: You're holding it.

[beep]

[whirring]

[cellphone vibrating]

[beep]

Yeah?

Malcolm: Volker's here.

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
Post Reply