01x06 - Episode 6

Episode transcripts for the 2016 TV show "The Aliens". Aired: March 2016 to April 2016
"The Aliens" is set forty years after aliens crash-landed in the Irish Sea; although looking like us, they are reluctantly integrated into British society, living in a ghetto, in the fictional city of Troy.
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01x06 - Episode 6

Post by bunniefuu »

I'm leaving at eight. I'm not coming back. I thought maybe you might want to come with me.

Does she really want to go with me or is she using me to get where she's going? 'I'm sorry, I'm not going to be there.'

Holly, that cop arrests me, the first thing out of my mouth is how they should run tests on a border guard I know.

She's just told me you're half Mork.

Of course it's not true.

'Everything that comes out of her mouth's a lie.'


So, now you have to make a decision.

Solicitor reckons two years, sacrificing my freedom so that my half Mork brother goes free.

We've got Fabien by the bollocks here.

The old Antoine wouldn't have thought twice about taking him down.

When the humans aren't stepping on us, then the gangsters are!

This w*r between Antoine and Fabien is k*lling our people!

'I'm half human, half alien.'

They want to wipe each other out, no complaints here.

The thing is to contain it.

This is not the time to run, this is time for an opportunity!

Lewis! Lewis! Lewis, it's me!

Stop! Push it!

Lewis, it's me.

Can you tell them I'm supposed to be let through, please?

It's all our w*r, Lewis!

How's my dad? Is he OK?


Is he OK?

I know it doesn't look like it, but this is the opportunity to get Troy back off the gangsters!

If we free ourselves from the gangsters and organise ourselves... the humans won't know what has hit them!

That's it, close the gates!


Lewis, I'm a key worker!

Can you tell them that?

Get back!

Get back!

Back off! Stand back! Back!

Aliens, step back or you will be arrested.

Chief, Chief, what about him?

No Morks this side. No exceptions.


♪ Na! Na-na-na-na-na ♪
♪ Na! Na-na-na-na-na ♪
♪ Na! Na-na-na-na-na-na-na ♪
♪ Na! Na-na-na-na-na-na-na ♪
♪ Ohh Plug me in and turn me on ♪
♪ Listen here cos here it comes ♪
♪ Got hot licks on ya guitar strings ♪
♪ Riffs and rhythms and guitar thangs ♪
♪ Turn me on and turn me up and turn me loose ♪
♪ I am alive and amplified ♪
♪ Turn me on and turn me up and turn me loose ♪
♪ I am alive and amplified ♪
♪ Turn me on and turn me up and turn me loose ♪
♪ I am alive and amplified ♪
♪ Turn me on and turn me up and turn me loose ♪
♪ I am alive ♪
♪ Na! Na-na-na-na-na-na-na ♪
♪ Na! Na-na-na-na-na-na-na ♪
♪ Na! Na-na-na-na-na-na-na ♪
♪ Na! Na-na-na-na-na-na-na ♪
♪ Na! Na-na-na-na-na-na-na. ♪

Who are you?

What do you mean the tunnel's closed?

Restricted service. On account of all the shit in Troy.

I'll pay more then. How much do you want?

Can you lower your voice?

You don't get it, I need to cross now.

You're being impolite, you're upsetting Mum.

It's OK, Mum.

We reopen tomorrow, 9am.

Like father, like son.

I know that...

He loved that bike, he was on it every day...

Hey! Look who I found in Holly's room.


She got the wrong one.

She was trying to sneak into your room, give you a surprise when you got home from work.

What are you like?


You should've told me you'd given Lily a key.

Nearly called the police on you, didn't I, love?

Do you know he's not said a word to me about you?

Can't keep your eyes off each other, eh?

Discreet exit for me.

I'm going to make one of my world-famous lasagnes.

You are staying for dinner.


Oh! I'd love to. Thanks, Niall.

How's Antoine?

Look, where is your sister's money?

I thought so.

As far as Fabien's concerned, I've got hold of a good earner, not a f*ck-up.

If I'm going to move on him, I have to keep him sweet.

Not enough you get her arrested.

She got arrested cos she's shit at her job.

You told her about me.

She backed me into a corner, there was nothing else I could do.

She chose to go to prison instead of you, which is smart, because she is useless to anyone the way she was.

So, you keep making bad decisions and people keep having to step in and fix them.

I need to get to Troy. I have to see Antoine.

You need to stay away from Troy.

No! I'm not, he needs my help.

Lasagne's ready.

Fabien don't mess around, does he?

You know all this is just a show, to hide the fact that he is weak?

He ain't got no real support.

You know what we need to do now? We need to hit back hard.

Teach that f*ck some manners.

Jesus Christ.

Oh, that is not nice.

I thought I could smell something in here.

It's a w*r. I mean, there's going be some casualties.

Do you want me to send out a memo about dogs?


I want you to go to Fabien and tell him I'm ready to talk.

Troy is only ever going to ever belong to one person.

You don't come to terms. You win.


Do not go soft on me.

We're at a crucial juncture here.

We should be talking about stepping up a gear, not worrying about what people are going to think on take-your-son-to-work day!

About Lewis?

You're f*cking right I'm talking about Lewis.

We used to laugh at people like you.

"All sack, no balls," we used to say.

Do you remember that?

He's wrecked you.

Just get the message to Fabien.

Turns out we only had the two.

So, a bit of sliced loaf should bulk it out a bit.

Don't tell the Italians, will you?

It's really good.

So, internet, eh?

I was telling your dad how we met online.

It's mad how the internet puts everything on the one level.

I mean, he got a girl like you up here, fella like him down there.

It's completely different leagues.

What site was it?

You know, I never really saw it like that.

No, I thought he was amazing from the start.

She's got to say that.

No, he is. He's a good bloke.

I'm lucky that way.

And with Holly. His sister, Holly.

She's in custody.

She's a fantastic girl.

Trust her to a fault, really.

She got mixed up with some Mork bastards.

The filthy fu...

I'm OK.

Niall, do you mind if I stay the night?

You mean with Lewis? No, no, I don't mind at all.

In fact, I think it's a terrific idea.



I got the duvet from Holly's bed.

I'll take the floor.

It's fine.

Look, I'm not kicking you out of your own bed.

I only asked to stay so I had a roof till morning when I can go back to Troy, I'll take the floor.

I don't want the bed, thank you.

You're being a dick about it.

How is this being a dick?

Is this too many clothes?

We ain't having sex.

I knew this was going to happen.

I have sex with people that I use, people that I don't care about.

Try something new.

Every bad thing you said about me... is true.

I have a plan.

And for a second, I was going to drop it and I was going to leave with you, but it didn't work out, so my plan is back on.

And I'm going to see it through.

I'm not going to stop.

You have to understand that.

I do. I get it. Not going to stop.

And having sex with me is a completely unnecessary add-on.

When all of this is over, you're not going to feel the same way about me.

Things are going to happen and you are not going to like 'em.

It doesn't make any difference.

Do you not get that yet?

You keep doing horrible things.

You have from day one.

And I keep feeling the same about you. I can't help it.

Tomorrow we'll go to Troy and we'll find Antoine.

Hi, I'm wondering if you can help me.

Yeah, there's a house on my street and people keep coming in and out of it at all hours.


I think there's some kind of tunnel in there and I'll tell you something else.

I think those people coming in and out are aliens.

'Get in as fast as you can. We just got a tip-off. The Morks have got a tunnel.'

Get down! Get down on the floor! Get down!


Look what they did to our town!


Look what they did to our homes and our families!

And what are we going to do?

Are we going to wait for them to finish?

Are we going to wait for them to say, "Oh, it's OK now. You can tidy up after us. You can bury your d*ad, your loved ones that got k*lled in the crossfire"?

Or do we strike back?

Do we say, "No more"?

Troy does not belong to you. It belongs to us.

The dealer I had on the human side.

It worked out.


That's all I ask.

Basic dependability.

Fab, there's someone here to see you.

Antoine wants to talk.

There's something on there you should see first.

All right? Hey there.

I brought you those clothes what you asked for.

Aw, cheers.

How are they treating you?

I asked you to bring me something for the court date.

This is 90% socks.

Socks are clothes.

What am I going to look like in front of the judge head-to-toe in socks?

Oh, news -- Lewis had a girl round last night.

Oh, yeah. What was she? Homeless granny?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, she was not. No, she was very attractive.

Exotic sort. You know, very distinctive eyes.

Must've set him back a few quid.

What was her name?


Why, do you know her?

Are you f*cking joking me with this?

What did they do to me?

What did who do what...?

That bitch who put me in here and that little shit bag.

He was in it with her.

They've screwed me over.

The two of them, out there laughing at me.

I don't remember any laughing.

This is definitely taking the piss now.

I am not having any of this.

Lewis wouldn't do that.

What do you know about, "Lewis wouldn't"?

Lewis could do no wrong in your eyes, can he?

"No, Lewis didn't get suspended from nursery, Lewis didn't write on the wallpaper..."

Not the wallpaper again.

".. Lewis doesn't steal."

Why would Lewis write your name on the wallpaper?

Lewis, the golden boy. Shits Danish pastries...

Big letters -- "Holly Garvey."

Do you want to know why he's always so broke? Do you?

It's cos he's a perv.

Yeah, he spends all his money paying girls to get their tits out on sex cams.

You can check his credit card if you don't believe me.

You've always been like this.

You get yourself in a situation and you... you... you lash out at the people who care about you the most.

He's half Mork.

Half Mork, half human.

'I'm half human, half alien.'

Get a message to Antoine.

Tell him I'd love to talk.

This is the right thing. Trust me.

You believe this guy?


For having a go at you earlier.

That's what I pay you for.

All right there, Fabien?

Shoulders nice and warm, huh?

Get this f*cking thing off me.

f*ck off.

Oh, come on, lads.

It's nice to get the full experience.

So, ready when you are.

This w*r's bad for business, so... I want to make a proposal.

I get everything, you get a lump of coal.

Fabien, even with those finely honed negotiating skills....

Hey, f*ck!

Shut the f*ck up.

'Cos your dad's Antoine Berry...'


'.. your mum's human.'

Was a human.

'All this time you've been a border guard you've been a half breed... mixed something. Half human, half alien.'


No smart remarks?

Do you want this posted online, Antoine?

Then have your men stand down.

Every single one of them.

Tell them you're done.

How was it, f*cking a human?

I heard the women give off a smell.

You're a braver man than me. I couldn't stomach that.

Come on, you.

Oh, yeah... that thing with my boy... buys you a couple of hours to get your things in order.

After that... I'm coming for you.

If previous experience is anything to go by, it'll be a few days more before they get this out of their systems.

So, message is, sit tight...

I just want to say, this policy on containment, I'm against it.

Yeah, there's criminals over there for sure, but there's normal people too.

Little kids and... Dominic. What's Dominic ever done to anyone?

Dominic's the cleaner.

I'm saying I'm for intervention into Troy. I think we should do it.

Lost me at, "People."

The checkpoint is closed until further notice.

Do not approach.


Garvey, get back!

How did you know I'd come?

It's you.

How long have you been waiting there, Dominic?

Just since they closed the gates.

Don't drink that.


Don't drink anything in here.

Oh, God.

I need to get to Antoine's.

Take me there now, I'm not leaving him on his own.

What are you going to do, Lewis?

f*ck' guard him and that.

No. I've seen you guard. You're a terrible guard.

People steal your lunch from the fridge.

Anyway, we can't.

No-one knows where he is.

He just stopped fighting and told everyone to go home.

So they did, they didn't have a choice.


This is not something I would usually suggest.

She is good at plans, I suppose.

How did you get into Troy?

I walked through the checkpoint. Didn't think of that, did you?

I didn't think you'd be that stupid, no.

Yeah? Well, tough.

You can't talk to him.

I need your help.

He needs to protect Antoine.

Are you going to help or not?

So Fabien got hold of a phone with a recording of you telling your d*ad colleague you're half alien on it.

He played it to Antoine and told him if he didn't stand down he'd make it public.

Why would you let Truss record you saying you're half alien?

I didn't know he was recording me!

And that is why Antoine quit.

For you.

He's going to wait until the very last bit of Antoine's support slips away and then he's going to k*ll him.

And seeing as there ain't nothing left for people to be loyal to, that's going to be in a matter of hours.

We need to get that phone.



I've got a plan.

The phone's in a safe in Fabien's office.

That's the combination.

Whenever Fabien's in the office, he puts a guard on the door.

That's where you come in.

I've been stuck in a car for 20 hours.

Do you know what this is?

Ah, she's depraved.

It's a cattle prod.

Jam it here, press it here. And that'll take the guard down.

Could you not do that bit?

I think I'd trust you more to cattle prod.

I can cattle prod.

I'm going to be inside Fabien's office.

Why do you need to be inside?

Fabien's having a party.

It's a lot of people.

Look, I told you it's not going to be easy.

Yeah, but to rob a safe in front of a room full of people...

I'll clear the room before he gets in.

How are you going to do that?

There's only one thing that'll make Fabien end a party early.

He'll be in the back with me.

No. I don't want that. I don't want you to do that.

Do you know what, Lewis, it's my body, it's not your decision to make.

Fabien is not having Troy again. I will not allow it.

Any questions?

When do we do it?

Give me five minutes.

Do you want to hold the tickets?

I'll hold the tickets.

This is another first for me.

Breaking into a gangster's office!

Too loud, Dominic.

Genghis Khan, yeah?

Alexander the Great.

Julius Caesar.

f*ck'... Napoleon Bonaparte.

And Fabien.


Fabien! Wooo!

I'm scared. Really scared.

Just had the nod, boys.

Antoine is holed up in the old bakery.

Get over there and get the job done fast.

Get back here in time to show Fabien the pics before he passes out.

Go on.

Don't do it.

Fabien sent some people round to k*ll my dad.

I need to get there now. It's off. It's all off.

No. If you go, you might buy Antoine a day.

More likely, the both of you die tonight.

As long as Fabien's got the phone, Antoine is done for.

The phone defeats Antoine.

Look, the plan still works.

Send him to get Antoine out of the safe house and take him to his place.

Right. OK. Give me the cattle prod.

I don't think this is a very good idea. I'm a soft target.

It doesn't matter what you think, just give me the f*cking cattle prod now! You go to Antoine's.

I need you to go there.

Good luck, mate.

Mates and quality p*ssy only.

Who's the f*cking king!

You had me worried.

Thought you weren't going to make it.

I wouldn't miss this.

Get her a f*cking drink.

What do you want? Something in a glass.

Training him up.

Make a gentleman of him yet.

I'm not sure I want one of those.

Not tonight.

♪ The big jump ♪
♪ The big, big jump ♪
♪ The big jump... ♪

Everybody out!


It's me.

You don't know me, but I'm not who you think I am.

Antoine, Antoine, it's Dominic.

You have to let me in, all right.

There's people coming, there's people coming to k*ll you.

Lewis sent me. I can take you somewhere they don't know about.

Come on.

Get in.

I've never k*lled anyone before.

It's not actually as bad as they...

How many?

Where are we going?

Hey up.

Busy night.


Oh, no, no, I'm not...


Who are you?


Fabien, there's someone out here.

(What are you doing?)

I know you.

Is he supposed to be here?

What are you doing?

That's Antoine's boy.

You know, it's quite the unconventional...


What did you do that for?

I told you I wouldn't stop.

Look, I did everything I could to keep you out of it.

Keep me out of it how?

I'm right f*cking here!

You sh*t him, Lilyhot.

How the f*ck is that keeping me out of it?

What did you keep me out of?

It's nearly over.

You've sent people to k*ll Antoine.

Yeah, you did, you did.

f*ck, f*ck!

Lewis, do you think I went through all this just to swap bosses?


He was finished anyway.

And you say this was your first time?

That's weird. I'm wet.

Oh, shit, Dominic.

Ahhh! It's red wet.

I'm so sorry, mate, I should never have sent you.

I'm wearing a vest.

It's not a bulletproof one.

Oh, shit!


Oh, Lewis.


You were always...

"Where do I belong? Who are my people?"

I never cared about that stuff.

I'd have been OK if I had had just, just one person.

Just someone who was special to me and I was special to them.

I'd be fine if I'd had that.

Dominic. I am that one person.

I'm your friend.

I didn't want to say it at first for loads of different reasons but me and you, we are best mates.





That's a flesh wound. In and out.

Oh, for f*ck sake.

It must be the flesh where they keep all the blood then.

He'll be OK.

I want yous out of here.

What are you talking about?

This was great, really. Thank you and all that.

But as soon as your girlfriend finds out what's happened, there's going to be an army of g*ons up here.

Let them. Where am I going to go? I'm finished there.

Everyone saw me cross the border and I'm not spending the rest of my life looking for a good hiding place.

This is where it ends. With you.

No more making decisions for me. That's over.

No more getting out of tight spots. f*ck the spots. This is me.

You can get back.

There's a way.

Say it back to me.

I'm not saying it back to you, I don't like it.

Your friend Dominic is your criminal informant.

He got a message to you telling you where I was.

You thought it was a long sh*t but then you worked out the risk-reward ratio.

Now... Show me your "I've just apprehended the country's most wanted fugitive" face.

No-one's going to believe that.

Big-old hero story like that? They are going to eat it up.

You'll look like a Pearly King, they're going to pin so many medals on you.



f*cking hell!

That should get their attention.

Sorry, should've said -- in the air.

Now let's walk.

Authorised Firearm Officers here now!

And we are off.

Hang on.

Wait, wait. This is going way too fast.

Are you doing the face?

Because I'm doing "foiled by intrepid crime-fighter" up here.

You said Alien Detention was hell, you said that.

Yeah, for you maybe.

Me, I had the run of the place.

If you do this...

I'm never going to see you again.

I never thought I was going to meet you.

But I did. I got to meet you.

So all this is a bonus.

It was never going to last. We both knew that.

No, stop...

I'm happy.

Are you happy?

Stop talking like that, will you?

Please, Dad.


Be happy.

What are you talking about?

I'm going to have to say goodbye now.

No, don't do anything.


Don't, Dad.

Dad, don't. Don't.

Happy, yeah.

f*cking hell.

We'll need a debrief later.

For now, go home, get yourself fixed up.


'After an extensive undercover operation inside the Designated Alien Zone, Antoine Berry died today at 5.25 after being fired upon by armed officers.'

You'll appreciate that given unprecedented levels of disorder and the potential for spill-over, this intervention in the DAZ became unavoidable.

You will also appreciate why it had to remain confidential until after completion.

There'll be a full press conference in the morning.

No further questions at this time.

That was your dad, wasn't it?

Oh... f*ck.

It's all right.

'So your dad's Antoine Berry?'


'And your mum is human.'

Was a human.

'All this time you've been a border guard you've been a... half-breed.'

I got rid of Fabian's body.

Are you and me going to have a problem, Guy?



I'll let you know when I need you.

Impressive work, Garvey. Well done.


We're what's wrong here.

Keeping them inside that wall, saying that they're different.

It's us, we're the problem.

Drop your w*apon!

This building's being requisitioned by the Alien League on behalf of the people of Troy.

'Come and help me. I need you. I need you to come and help me. Come and help me.'
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