02x01 - Phase 3

[bunniefuu]

Previously, on "Casual"...

My brother made breakfast for my one-night stand.

Morning, Val. Just in time, get 'em while they're hot.

What the f*ck is wrong with you?

Um, lots of things.

Mom's gonna be so pissed.

You're grounded.

What?

I think she was talking to me.

Oh. Still.

I have a sister. We're not honest about anything.

Hmm, who do you share the intimate details of your life with then?

Nobody.

The thing with Val is she's just now getting back into the dating scene.

Where are you going?

Shut up.

We lasted 16 years, raised a daughter together, and then a month ago he left me for a younger woman.

That sucks.

I loved you, Val, and I loved our marriage, and I wish that we could have worked things out, but we didn't.

Your mother told me about how your depression got the best of you.

Maybe I'm not supposed to be happy.

I'm sorry I wasn't here in your moment of need.

You could've called, Dad.

Laura, dear, how are things at school?

It's been a few weeks since I've gone.

What was that?

Oh, just seems like such a poisonous environment.

What do you do with your spare time?

I started a website that's kind of taking off.

- What's the site?

Snooger.com.

You use your own dating site?

I wrote the matching algorithm.

And does that algorithm match you with any girl you find attractive?

Pretty much.

Emmy.

I had a really nice time tonight.

I mean, it just felt right.

I don't want to be alone.

I slept with Emmy.

Wait! Wait, Alex!

Alex's girlfriend Emmy.

That's... that's f*cked up.

I mean, we were good together.

We were good together.

But you should go.

God, you... okay.

Yeah, we deserve each other.

[birds chirping]

[sighs]

[birds chirping]

Come on.

[blender whirring]

[blender whirring]

Hello.

Morning.

Oh. [coughs]

Ugh, no. [coughs]

It's, like, 95% of the ingredients are fine, and then you get one moldy peach or, like, a bad raspberry, Suddenly the whole smoothie tastes rotten.

Where are you going?

I gotta get my run in by 7:00 if I'm gonna make yoga at 8:00.

Oh, you have a yoga appointment?

Yeah, Kai is teaching.

Kai?

It's a common name in the yoga community.

You hate exercise.

You know, I'm kind of trying to distance myself from that word, hate, verbally and emotionally.

How's that working for you?

Eh, so far, happiness is kind of boring, but I'm only on phase three.

There's phases?

Of the breakup.

Phase one is drinking, dr*gs, and women.

That phase is my favorite.

That's a shocker. Phase two?

Wallowing in self pity. Sorry about that, by the way.

But now, phase three, self improvement.

That sounds... great.

It's distracting, and distraction is the universal human motivator.

All right, I gotta go.

[gags] No, still bad.

[door closing]

Why is everyone up?

Oh, sorry.

Go back to bed.

Enjoy your last day before school.

Yeah. I'm not going back to school.

Serena, I have to ask.

What scares you so much about spirituality?

The whole thing is so crazy and inappropriate.

Asking you to come to a seder?

I don't want to join her cult.

Okay.

That's what it is, a cult, and she wants me to drink the Kool-Aid.

So her family is orthodox?

No, they're not that bad.

Serena, it feels like you have a pretty strong aversion to all things God.

No, I have an aversion to cults, and I just don't want her bringing it into our home, and I found a book of spells on the bookshelf.

A book of spells?

The Old Testament.

Uh, well... [clears throat]

You know, it sounds like it means something to her and she's trying to include you.

Talk to me.

About what?

I don't know, just say things to help me ignore the horrible thoughts inside my head.

Okay, uh... what if global warming destroys our entire planet and we're all fighting with each other for clean water?

Good God.

Uh... thanks.

Laura's not going back to school.

Oh.

Alex started exercising.

That's good.

No, it's a cry for help.

Okay.

He's looking for the root of his problems, and eventually, he's gonna look to me.

Because of Emmy.

No, actually, strangely, we have moved on from that.

Really?

Yeah, it's just bottled down nice and deep where it will either be absorbed into his body or it will lead to septic shock.

I don't know, I'm crazy. I've just been...

I haven't been sleeping because I got these birds outside my window and they're going, "Chirp, chirp, chirp," constantly, and you know, is it wrong that I just want them to die?

Where's the bathroom key?

Um, Jennifer borrowed it this morning.

Who's Jennifer?

She's the new woman next door.

And she didn't bring it back?

That's rude.

Do you want me to call her?

No, I mean, I'm heading out.

I'm just gonna go down at the coffee place.

Whew.

[door opening and closing]

What the f*ck?

Experimental goat cheese.

Every batch is different. You want some?

No, I'm good.

You ever play?

The piano?

Mm-hmm.

It's more for show really.

Hmm. That's a shame.

[phone alert chimes]

So, your mom tells me you're not going back to school.

[groans] It's too traumatic.

I decided to take a hiatus, maybe go backpacking.

Really?

No.

We're touring East Alvarado tomorrow.

Public school.

I didn't know it was that bad.

What do you mean?

Have you ever been to public school?

There's metal detectors and drug dogs, shakedowns, raids.

They don't have enough chairs.

Okay, Alex.

I'm serious.

The only advantage of going to public school is one day, if you survive, you get to say, "And I went to public school."

Great, and then everyone will resent me.

Only privately.

[scoffs] Why is this happening to me?

Why is this happening for you?

It's positive thinking. It's like, if...

No, I know what it means. Why did you say it?

I find it's a helpful way to examine your life.

Oh. Says who?

Says Kai.

[ethereal chimes]

♪ ♪

I think I can see inside of that person.

She's sweating out her insecurities.

3 pounds of water weight?

Mm-hmm.

And it'll come right back. That's the secret.

It's how people get addicted to hot yoga.

[sighs] Is it always so warm in here?

Yup.

Hey, what are your thoughts on a magnet school?

I have no idea what that is.

Boarding school?

Do you really want to be one of those equestrian girls with a riding crop under her mattress?

I'm not even gonna try to unpack that.

Probably for the best.

Could just get my GED.

That's for inmates and child actors.

You're worthless, you know that?

We should do this more often, just the two of us.

Please slow down.

Hey, Alex.

Oh, hey, Beth.

You weren't in your usual spot.

I thought you were slacking.

Yeah, I was hanging on the side with Laura here.

Oh, my God, is this your daughter?

Niece, but we're actually the same person.

Uh, no, I'm better adjusted.

She is.

[chuckles] Well, I was gonna take a walk, maybe get a bite to eat, see a movie.

You want to meet me?

Oh, man. You know...

What?

I would. I would, but you're actually a real person, and the thought of intimacy or... really anything beyond a night of meaningless sex is just... it's totally crushing on an existential level, so... rain check?

Okay.

f*cking phase three!

Hey.

[groans]

What happened to you?

Yoga.

[chuckles] Beauty cult.

It's not even self loathing, 'cause that would be to obvious.

It's like this unspecified malaise that just sucks you in like gravity.

It's almost inescapable. Am I making any sense.

He forced me to run with him.

Oh.

And he... shamed me onto his diet.

He threw away all my food.

You look skinnier.

Valerie, I'm hungry.

Look, I just wish we could bring him back to how he was.

Really?

Well, I mean, he's on the path to spiritual enlightenment.

But can't you get him laid or something?

Already tried that, phase one.

Yes.

That is where Alex thrives, phase one.

You can bring him back.

You want your mentally unstable, possibly suicidal brother to revel in his drinking and philandering?

I suppose I could... talk to him.

Thank you, Leon, thank you. That's...

How are things with you?

Oh, they're not good. They're not good at all.

Let me know how it goes.

And Leon, finish the croissant.

[footsteps leaving]

[elevator bell dings]

[hammering and drilling]

Leia.

[hammering and drilling]

Leia!

She's remodeling.

Jennifer?

I tried going over there, but she hasn't been in all morning.

We still don't have a bathroom key.

How long is this supposed to last?

It sounds serious.

Yeah, 'cause you know what? She's trying to drive me out.

She wants my office too. That's what it is.

Yeah, that's what it is. She wants... this is an invasion.

Okay.

[pounding on the ceiling]

They're in the ceilings.

I can't work like this.

[hammering]

[playing a single bended note]

♪ ♪

Where's Laura?

She's getting ready.

Mind if I tag along?

Why?

Because I like doing things and this is a thing.

[plays a single note]

So do you offer electives?

Computer science, life skills, shop, it's all in the packet.

What about the arts?

Painting, drawing, and drama.

But no photography?

Students haven't expressed an interest.

Have you asked?

Um, what is your average class size here?

39 for 11th graders.

Couldn't get to 40, huh?

Which child did they leave behind?

Laura, what do you think about the school?

Uh, I think I'm gonna speak to one of the locals.

Well, if you need anything else, I will be in my office.

Thank you.

Still curious about your chair situation.

Val.

I know.

Come on.

I know.

This is depressing, we can't send her here.

Hell, I'd do a better job teaching her.

I told Laura that I would support whatever decision she made.

Well, then don't let her make this one.

Well, we don't have a lot of options.

No private school's gonna take her with such short notice.

[text alert]

I don't know.

Oh, sh*t!

What?

God!

Who does construction at 11:00 a.m. on a Wednesday?

Everyone.

It's a job, like any other.

Thank you.

Hey. Do you go to school here?

No, I just like to hang out in this hallway.

Right, sorry.

Well, could you tell me what it's like?

'Cause I'm thinking of transferring from Cedar Ridge.

Why?

Sex scandal.

So, what's it like here?

It's all the same.

School's a f*cking drag everywhere.

I guess the worst part here is watching the teachers wonder every day how their lives went so wrong.

Okay.

How's it going?

Fine, I guess.

You sure?

I didn't like that school.

Yeah. Neither did I.

I'm starving.

Me too. How 'bout we order in?

Only if it's junk.

Done.

[phone ringing]

Hello?

Alex?

Yeah, of course. I'll be right there.

No, don't worry about it. I'm on my way.

Leon needs me.

Well, you scared me. I mean, an actual phone call?

There's protocol to this stuff.

Unless you're bleeding out on the sidewalk, just text.

Sorry, I-I had a bit of a rough go of it today.

Yeah? What's up?

I-I saw a picture of Mara.

Your ex-fiancée?

Yeah.

I follow her on Instagram, which is a bad idea, but her compositions are well conceived.

That's bullshit.

Anyway, there was a picture of her and another man, and they were holding hands.

Aw, f*ck.

I clicked on him and there were more pictures, and when I scrolled down, I saw this.

Oh, man! f*cking bitch.

When she cheated, she moved out and we just stopped talking. There was never... closure.

That's hard, man.

I feel like I was never allowed to move forward, to heal.

She really hurt you, didn't she?

I-I think we've both been hurt by the ones we love.

[sighs]

But... if we don't confront it, we never get better.

Shouldn't we talk about these things?

Shouldn't we tell them how we feel?

Yeah. Yeah, you're right.

Yes. Yeah, great.

Perhaps we should get some sh*ts.

No time for that. Let's go.

Go... go... go where?

To Mara's.

Mara's?

Yeah, for closure.

Now?

Mm-hmm.

But I...

Well, I don't know where she's moved and I erased her number.

Let's just sit down and...

Leon, I cyber-stalked Mara the day I met you.

I've got her address.

Well...

Come on.

Alex, wait. No, no, no, no, no, no.

Hold on, hold on, wait, wait, wait.

Okay, Mindy, you will be in charge of hiring the new nurse.

Okay, okay, so just for the record, this responsibility has been given to someone that's got a chocolate fountain in her office.

This is amazing. People love this.

Do you remember high school?

I'm not that old.

Who were you?

Um, I was kind of lost, I guess.

I don't know, just... you know, dealing with my parents and taking care of Alex and... kind of had to be a grown-up before I was done being a kid.

And then what?

And then I met your dad, had you... and everything just kind of fell into place.

[indistinct TV chatter]

I'm gonna be 40.

I'm gonna be 40 years old and I'm living in my brother's house.

[laughs]

Yeah, almost as though you planned it.

[laughs]

How does he seem to you?

Alex?

I don't know.

Sometimes I wish he'd say something.

He's healing in his own way.

Does he hate me?

No, I don't think he really hates anybody.

[TV news traffic chatter]

Alex! Stop.

This is for your own good. Mara needs to hear this.

Look, look, I don't care about Mara.

Course you do.

No, I don't.

I only brought her up so we could talk about you!

Leon, I'm fine.

You're not fine, you're hurt and angry, and you're not gonna get any better by ignoring it...

Leon?

What are you doing here?

Mara, I-I apologize.

Don't apologize to her.

Who is this?

Go on.

Alex, please.

I'm... so...

You broke his hear. You know that, right?

He trusted you, let you into his home, and you just get to move on?

No. No, f*ck that.

And f*ck you. You don't just get to forget.

Okay, go on, Leon. Tell her how you feel.

Tell her how it feels to be betrayed by the person you love most in the world.

I'm sorry.

Alex? Um...

Thank you.

That was helpful.

You're welcome.

How is he?

Who, Leon?

Mm-hmm, yeah.

He's gonna be fine.

[plays piano]

♪ ♪

[stops playing piano]

[birds chirping]

[printer printing]

What the hell are you doing?

What is this?

Syllabuses.

Syllabi? Syllabi.

Last night after I come home, I'm thinking about Laura, 'cause she can't go back to school but she also can't go to a new school she hates, 'cause then what's the point, right, and she's only got two years, 1 1/2 maybe, but...

Alex, what are you talking about?

Before you get upset, John Adams was homeschooled, James Garfield, Andrew Jackson before he went on his Indian k*lling spree.

Those people lived 200 years ago.

And the medium's only improved.

The lesson plans are online, they're state sanctioned.

We can choose any textbooks we like, and tailor a program that teaches her the things we wish we knew when we were kids.

I did all of your homework throughout high school.

Yeah, because the classes were outdated even then.

It's 2016, Val.

We need to prepare our children for the future.

Okay, she's my child.

Technically.

W-what makes you think you're even qualified to teach?

I can teach.

Hey there.

Hey.

Did you tell her?

Uh-huh.

It's great, right?

Can't believe we didn't think of it before.

Is there coffee?

In the pot.

You should teach psych.