02x09 - Contains Graphic Designer v*olence

[bunniefuu]

Previously on "Angie Tribeca"...

Mayhem Global? What do we know about them?

They got their hands in a little bit of everything... construction, import/export, fracking, real estate, party supplies, T-shirts, culturally-insensitive Halloween costumes, and all the healthcare in Louisiana.

So, Mayhem Global hires Duran to hack Meet'N'Cheat.

She draws us in.

Then she hacks us from the inside. But why?

As soon as we get Mayor Perry out of there and elect d*ck Dreyfuss, we can start to make real change.

Who the hell are these people?

Mayhem Global. Mayhem Global.

Mayhem Global. Mayhem Global.

Mayhem Global.

Mayhem Global.

I am Mayhem Global.

[Sirens wailing in distance]

[Rock music plays]

♪

[Sighs]

[Knock on door]

♪

Geils! Tribeca! Get in here!

Where's Tribeca? She's late again.

That's three tardies this week.

One more, and she can't go to the aquarium.

I just don't know what's up with her.

We find 50 kilos of cocaine at this drug dealer's house.

Yeah.

And I say, "That's a lot of snow for Los Angeles."

Nice.

k*ller line.

I nailed the timing and everything.

She gives me nothing.

Geils, let me explain something to you.

In every cop's life, they go through a phase where they feel like the system doesn't work.

The bad guys get away, and it feels like there's nothing the police can do about it.

I think I saw a documentary about this on PDTV.

Alan Thicke narrated it.

She's got things going on in her body right now that even she doesn't understand.

Here.

"The Changing Badge." Thanks, Lieutenant.

Sorry I'm late.

The, uh, thing wasn't working.

Anyway, a graphic designer's been m*rder*d.

So? Good riddance.

No, no.

We still have to investigate it, no matter how personally despicable we find them.

So, let me guess... We go through the motions of capturing the k*ller, and once we have him, we let him off on a technicality?

"Even though you know your partner's changing, she might not know she's changing."

Get down to the graphic designer's loft, figure out who k*lled him.

Also, find out what the parking's like down there and what they're gonna list it for.

♪

So, I was thinking maybe after the crime, we could get a drink together.

Oh, yeah, I have a lot of stuff going on right now, so maybe some other crime?

What are we looking at, Scholls?

Victim's name is Sebastian Elsworth.

Graphic designer.

Worked mainly in the advertising space... posters, labels, coupons... though he won't need to back up his work anymore because he just got sent to the cloud.

[Low trombone notes play]

Upstairs neighbor's a trombone player.

Blunt-force trauma to the head?

Yes.

We haven't been able to recover the m*rder w*apon, but I'll never stop loving you.

Checked his computer. Upstanding guy.

Doesn't share his Netflix password, pays for his p*rn, has a good relationship with most of his clients, including the Mayor Perry campaign.

Don't tell me this has to do with Mayhem Global and the election.

I have no idea.

You said he had a good relationship with most of his clients.

That means the majority.

There was a long, angry back-and-forth between Elsworth and an Alistair Cook who owns a local microbrewery.

"Dr. McBadbones Old Fashioned Crazy Style Triple Brewed Lager."

Seems Cook wasn't too happy with Elsworth's design, so refused to pay him.

E-mails got pretty heated.

In one, he called him a "ducking armhole," which I'm quite sure was autocorrected for something else.

Let's have forensics search the area for the m*rder w*apon, and I'll go talk to Alistair Cook...

I guess.

What's up with her?

Oh.

Hoffman went through that whole thing.

Do the worksheets in the back.

They really help.

Thanks.

Want to go interview this microbrewery guy?

I got a thing I got to do, but can you cover me?

Of course. No problem.

Oh, it looks like a beautiful sunset.

I see a sickly orphan sleeping next to a dead cow.

All right. See you around.

I hired the guy to make labels for my beer.

They were six weeks late, and they were terrible, so, yeah, I was a little aggravated.

A little aggravated?

The title of your e-mail said, "I'm very aggravated."

Okay, very aggravated, but I'm a small business owner.

I can't afford setbacks like that.

I've spent 18 years of my life perfecting Dr. McBadbones Old Fashioned Crazy Style Triple Brewed Lager, and this guy sends me a label that looks like this.

The skeleton's drinking beer, and it's all leaking out his ribcage 'cause he's got no organs.

Huh. That's awesome.

Oh.

Oh!

That's pretty amazing.

I guess I was pretty out of line when I called him a "ducking armhole."

Mr. Cook, where were you last night?

I was in "Oklahoma!"

Which part?

Understudy for Curly McLain, but I like to be there.

I'm gonna need to see a playbill.

Oh, sure.

Let me just drop everything and go find it.

Oh, wait.

I don't have time for that 'cause I got to be here and do everything myself.

You know 9 out of 10 small businesses fail in their first 100 years?

I'll get you your playbill, Detective.

You want to give me a hand with this?

Yeah, sure.

Thanks.

Seems like the beer guy's story checked out.

Cool.

I'm thinking of bringing in the neighbor this afternoon... the trombone player?

Yeah, it makes sense.

You all right?

Mm-hmm.

[Whirring]

You sure you don't want to tell me anything?

Nope. Feeling great.

Got a great job that actually makes a difference in the world.

It's really clear who the good guys are and the bad guys are.

I'm the luckiest girl in the world.

[Bubbling]

Hey, thanks for doing this, man.

I know it's short notice, but Tribeca took off early.

No problem, bro.

Thanksgiving's not a big deal in my family, anyway.

All right, Sousa.

Where were you on the night that happened last night?

I was home.

Alone?

Alone?

Uh, sorry.

Alone?

Alone?

You... You go.

Alone?

No. I was with my trombone, Todd.

And what is your relationship with Sebastian Elsworth?

Honestly?

If that's how you want to play it.

He drove me insane... graphic designing all day, all night.

Click, click, click. Mouse, mouse, mouse.

Prrrrr-int! Prrrrr-int!

I could barely hear myself practice my trombone.

So he made you pretty angry.

He sure did.

Angry enough to go downstairs and hit him in the head with your blunt instrument?

Definitely that angry. See, this guy gets it.

Oh. Wait. You think I k*lled Elsworth with my trombone?

You guys have any idea how much a Nobbingsly trombone costs?

Yeah.

Yeah.

How much?

Well, it would depend on what year the Toppings...

Nobbingsly... Trombone was made.

It was a 1961 plated-brass Nobbingsly Futura 605.

$53,684.45.

All right, so you know your Nobbingsly.

So you also know that it would be ridiculous for me to risk damaging it by hitting Elsworth in the head, even though that graphic designer deserved it.

Are we done here?

I have a huge performance tomorrow where a man's joke is gonna fall flat.

I don't think the neighbor had anything to do with it.

And the beer guy's story checks out.

So we've got a m*rder without a m*rder*r.

Well, no one can say we didn't try.

See you Monday.

Looks like Scholls has a r*fle.

Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee...

One of my techs found this in the Dumpster next to Elsworth's apartment.

There's traces of blood and hair that match the victim.

But here's the interesting part.

I went to check it into evidence, was told someone checked it out of evidence yesterday.

Who checked it out?

That would tell us exactly who did it.

A. Tribeca.

Please tell me it's not Angie Tribeca.

I'm afraid so.

The Angie Tribeca that works here?

Yep.

Damn it.

♪

Angie.

[Doorknob rattles]

Angie, are you there?

Tribeca, I have to talk to you.

Where are you going?

I ran out of milk.

You have a packed bag and a plane ticket.

Me gusto la leche de Mexico.

Is there something you'd like to say to me?

Maybe about Sebastian Elsworth, the graphic designer?

Maybe... I don't know... you k*lled him?

[Sighs]

Did I?

It would seem that way.

You signed the m*rder w*apon out of evidence yesterday.

Then it somehow got Elsworth's brains smeared all over it.

I've only been at this for 15 years, but that's what we call an open-and-shut case.

It's the kind of case you and I used to cr*ck by 10:00 a.m. and ride roller coasters all afternoon.

Well, I guess you have no choice but to arrest me, Jay.

No, no, no, no, no.

You want to tell me what's going on, Angela?

I'm afraid I can't do that.

Does this have to do with Mayhem Global?

Does this have to do with the election?

Is it because Elsworth was designing posters for the Perry campaign?

You're a good detective, Geils. You'll figure it out.

This isn't you, Angie.

I know you've been going through something lately, but you've got your whole career ahead of you.

And even though we never see it, we're raising a baby together.

Fine.

This isn't as kinky as I imagined it, but I'm gonna cuff you.

You have the right to...

[Handcuffs click]

You know the rest.

Hello, Tribeca.

Remember me?

Yeah. Hey.

Abigail Liukin.

Right.

From... college?

Internal Affairs.

Yes! Right.

Hello, Liukin. Hm.

I knew you were a dirty cop the moment I laid eyes on you.

The water in my building was shut off that day.

Tribeca.

I just wanted you to know if there's anything you need...

I know, Lieutenant. I know.

No. I was gonna say we can't really help you right now.

You're pretty toxic.

Even if you did k*ll that guy, you're still my girl.

You hear me?

You're still... my girl.

Thanks, Tanner. That means a lot.

He's not too good with goodbyes.

Ow!

[Breathes sharply]

Ow!

All right. Okay.

My bad.

Oh!

Just... I'll do it.

Oh!

Aah! [Breathes sharply]

Oh!

♪

Is that your statement?

Yep.

We've got you, Tribeca.

You signed out the m*rder w*apon yesterday morning at 9:00 a.m.

It was found near the crime scene in a Dumpster along with some of your hair, a to-do list in your handwriting with "m*rder" crossed off, and a sandwich with a bite taken out of it that we matched to your dental records, and this vanity license plate.

Want to try your statement again?

No, thanks.

Do you have any idea how satisfying it's gonna be for me to put you away?

Mm, I don't know.

Like an 8?

Try 9... 1/2.

Well, then, this is your lucky day.

Play all the games you want, Tribeca, but you're gonna tell me what you know about Mayhem Global and their connection to this mayoral election...

Because if you don't, so help me God, I will unleash holy hellfire on you.

I will roll up the Constitution and b*at you with it.

And by the end, you'll be crying and wishing you...

Take her away.

Come with me.

What are we gonna do?

If I knew what to do, I'd be doing it, Geils.

We got to do something.

But what? What do we do?

Something.

Agreed! But what?

Maybe...

Pizza's here.

♪ $5 ♪
♪ Large pizza, it's here ♪
♪ $5 ♪
♪ Every day of the year ♪
♪ $5 ♪
♪ Hot-N-Ready to go ♪
♪ $5 ♪
♪ Little Caesars pizza show ♪

Pizza, pizza.

Anything else, Lieutenant?

That'll be all, Stan.

Let's just say she did do it.

It was a graphic designer.

Victimless crime.

She didn't do it.

Do you think if Tribeca has a r*fle, she's gonna hit someone in the head with it and then throw it in the Dumpster right next to the building?

It's like someone's framing her, and she's going along with it.

Why?

I don't know.

Maybe her childhood fantasy was to be sentenced to life in prison.

No, that's not right.

She said she wanted to be a magician.

Yeah. So she gets to prison so she can plan the greatest escape in history.

I feel like we're getting offtrack.

The only way we're gonna clear Tribeca's name is to exonerate her, and that means we have to find out who actually k*lled Sebastian Elsworth.

We're on it, Lieutenant.

And this time, it's personal.

Yeah.

Wait a minute.

It really is personal this time because I have a connection to Tribeca and she's the focus of the case.

Wow. You're right.

This case really is personal for you.

[Chuckles]

Wait a minute.

I know Tribeca, as well, and what happens to her affects my life.

This time, it's personal.

Guys, this is gonna blow you away, but I'm her boss.

She's my employee.

No matter what the turnout, I have an emotional stake in it.

This time, it's personal.

You guys mind if I mop the office?

Sure. We were just heading out to clear Tribeca's name.

Angie Tribeca?

Yeah.

One time, I locked my keys in my car, and she helped get them out.

I owe her everything.

This is personal.

Let's go.

♪
♪

♪

Dr. Scholls, is this a bad time?

[Crying]

No, it's fine. What's up?

Here.

I think whoever m*rder*d our graphic designer meant to use the sh**t end of the g*n.

He had a perch across the street.

You want me to help you save Tribeca?

I want you to help me catch a m*rder*r.

I actually thought with her out of the way, we'd have a sh*t, that her life sentence could be our happily ever after.

Monica, I'm sure this doesn't make up for anything, but I do care about you.

Enough with the lies, Geils.

What we had was real.

Is that a lie?

Yeah.

Sorry. Old habits.

But I only lied to you because I knew the truth would hurt you.

That's what good guys do.

I guess I just wished that, one time, you'd looked at me the way you look at her.

That's it?

I can do that.

[Romantic music plays]

She's so lucky.

[Computer beeps]

This is impossible.

The fingerprints belong to a cop who's been dead for 10 years... a Sergeant Edward Pepper.

That's Tribeca's old fiancé.

His name's come up a lot recently for someone who's supposed to be dead.

I mean, dead means dead, never coming back.

[Crying]

♪

I know why Tribeca's letting herself be framed.

She's gonna hook up with Diane Duran in prison.

Tanner, get a webcam in there.

Geils, reserve the domain name GirlCopsBehindBars.com.

No. I meant "hook up" in a conspiracy sense.

I think Tribeca's gone to the dark side.

I think that she and Duran and Sergeant Eddie Pepper are conspiring to k*ll Mayor Joe Perry.

Gentlemen... we have an assassination to stop.