01x06 - Lights! Camera! Fitzgerald!

[bunniefuu]

♪♪ [theme]

♪♪ [scatting]

♪ You should have a great career ♪
♪ Yes, you should, and you could ♪
♪ If you want a future, darlin' ♪
♪ Why don't you get a past? ♪
♪ For that fatal moment's comin' at last ♪
♪ We're all alone ♪
♪ No chaperone can get our number ♪
♪ The world's in slumber, let's misbehave ♪

Can it be better than this?

Of course it does.

♪ There's something wild about you, child ♪
♪ That's so contagious ♪

Here we are.

♪ Let's be outrageous ♪
♪ Let's misbehave ♪
♪ They say that bears have love affairs ♪
♪ And even camels ♪
♪ We're merely mammals ♪

[applause]

♪ Let's misbehave ♪

[chatter, laughter]

[glass shatters]

Here you go.

Man: Over here.

Uh-huh.

Ultra dry.

Come on. Hurry up.

You have a drink. Come on.

Oh.

Just gorgeous.

Perfect.

We'll be back.

♪♪

Hey.

Been here one month, and you're all they write about.

"'Who's Who and Why'.

"Frivolous facts about the great and the near-great."

Ironic, being that your book isn't out.

[laughter]

Oh, Bunny, how I've missed you.

There's been no one to keep me tethered to the earth.

So tell me, what brings you back to New York?

Did all of Europe grow tired of your opinions, or was it just the French?

Here we go. I need a drink.

Have I really been gone so long that they're calling you the son of the city now?

Mm-hmm.

Don't they realize that you're from Minnesota?

[giggling]

And they call this journalism.

Well, working for Vanity Fair doesn't mean you know anything about journalism, my friend.

[chuckling]

Mm, please be a dear, darling.

Of course, dear.

Gives me a reason to live.

I don't know why Eugenia puts up with it.

She has to. If it weren't got Tallulah, no one would know who she is.

I have to say, as unbearable as Tallulah is, she was really lovely in that play tonight.

Lovely in a ghastly production.

This town has a short mAmory.

She'd better find a new play quickly.

Someone needs to dance with us.

At your service.

You dance with Eugenia.

Thank you, sister.

He must be some kind of a genius or something.

You'll enjoy that.

Shall we?

Delighted.

I have been noodling and hieing my capital eyes on this success of yours, Fitzgerald.

I'm sure you have.

Yes.

And I have a brilliant idea.

We turn Paradise into a picture show.

[scoff]

Starring you and Zelda.

You want us to act in it?

Mm-hmm.

That's absurd.

I've already spoken to my colleagues at United Artists about it.

You spoke to them about Paradise?

Yes, because I would adapt it, obviously.

Obviously.

Well, who else would you want to write it?

I mean the point is UA loves the idea.

It makes sense to them.

You're both already in the public eye.

And the two of you...

Are not actors.

Exactly. You're one better.

You are Amory and Rosalind.

You know, let's be honest.

Those characters are basically you.

Pass the g*n, darling.

Mm.

Leave it to Townsend to try and draft off my success.

It will be a good film.

Can you imagine the two of us up on the screen?

I don't suppose acting's too terribly hard.

No.

Luddy certainly thinks we can pull it off.

[laughter]

Any more enbalming fluid, old man?

[giggling]

It's under the bed.

Ah. Of course.

Close the door, Bunny!

I think we should do it.

We have to do something in between all these parties.

I've always loved acting.

And a motion picture is something that we could do together.

Think of how much fun it'll be, goofo.

Well, if it sounds like fun to you, then it sounds like fun to me.

[door opens]

Ohh! Can't a man take a bath with his wife?

Mr. Fitzgerald, Mrs. Fitzgerald, people are complaining about the noise.

There is water seeping into the room below.

This is the Biltmore, sir. We have standards.

[both laughing]

[screaming]

♪♪["Hearts and Flowers" on piano]

Don't make fun.

I'm not. You're captivating.

I mean it.

As a matter of fact, I have some news.

Shh!

So I spoke to Townsend today.

Mm-hmm.

And he said before anything can happen, the studio wants to see what we look like on celluloid.

So he's arranging for a screen test.

[exhale] A screen test?

Shh!

Oh, shush yourself.

You beast. Why didn't you tell me straightaway?

Isn't it enough?

The two of us on film?

Oh, it's like a dream.

Always leave your mouth parted. It's more suggestive.

Her right side's better.

Your right side's better.

It is?

Remember, it's all about the close-up.

Remind her not to smoke, Ed.

No, don't smoke, darling.

Studio rule. It's unladylike.

You just have to hold it.

What's the fun of that?

Well, this has nothing to do with fun, trust me.

You are smart to seek out a professional. There's nothing worse than an amateur thespian.

That's not what you do with your cigarette.

Yes, it is.

You don't see yourself.

I do, and you always...

Bitty, who's the actor here?

For heaven's sake.

There you go. That's better.

There's really nothing to fret over, Zelda.

It's the pictures. You don't have to actually speak.

It's far less challenging than the stage.

Mama was a stage actress.

Mrs. Minnie Sayre?

That explains it.

Hmm.

She was offered a part in a traveling theatrical, but her daddy thought the profession unseemly, so she married the judge instead.

How tragic, giving up your dreams to marry a man.

Stories like that make me especially grateful to be a lesbian.

Perhaps I'm making too big a fuss over this.

I'm photographed for the newspaper all the time.

Yes, but the question is what are you appearing in those papers for, darling?

It's not like you were really doing anything.

[chuckling]

[chuckling]

Oh, you're going to be just fine.

Look at you.

You certainly have the eyes for it.

Yes. They're even bigger than yours.

Mm.

Scott: Zelda clips them all. She's making a book.

Glad one of you is.

These are from this week alone.

They love us.

I should think that you'd be thrilled at the attention.

It's good for book sales.

"Fitzgerald's Flounder Falls In a Fountain."

Hard to see the correlation.

Well, there's no such thing as bad publicity, Max, except for one's own obituary, and, well, even then.

Oh, come on, Perkins.

Can't a fellow enjoy his success?

I've earned this.

Do you know a young author by the name of Sinclair Lewis?

I never heard of him.

Rumor has it his new novel is a masterpiece.

You're a real killjoy, Perkins, you know that?

I'm just trying to protect your mantle.

Well, it feels slightly more ominous than that.

See this?

I was never much good at math.

I can translate. This is what we call a plateau.

Sales of your book have leveled off.

One can't stay on top forever.

Obviously.

Unless one us a superb writer, as you are, and one generates another book to follow on the heels of one's first success.

Have you begun writing yours?

I'm always writing, Max.

Mm-hmm.

And what's this I hear about a motion picture?

It's one thing to sell your stories to the pictures, but acting in them?

It's just Townsend's folly.

He's just angling for an easy sell, monkeying with Zelda.

It'll never come to fruition.

Keep it that way.

Hollywood is for writers who can't write.

It will undermine your reputation.

Worst thing you could do for your career.

I've already talked with Alfredo about making that same suit in linen and seersucker.

That way, when we go to Hollywood, you have something lighter to wear.

I don't need any more suits. I have plenty.

How much is this costing anyway?

Careful, Alfredo.

Mr. Fitzgerald dresses left.

That'll be a good look for Amory, don't you think?

You'll be him, and he'll be you.

There's no guarantee that I'll be him.

Of course you'll be him. That's the whole point.

Townsend's already talked to the studio about it, and after the screen test...

About the screen test...

I spent the whole afternoon with Tallulah, working on my emotional projection.

Perkins doesn't like the idea of the film.

Not one bit.

Scott, the screen test is tomorrow, and Townsend's gone to a lot of trouble.

I've been preparing...

Max doesn't think that being in the pictures befits a serious writer.

He doesn't want me distracted.

He just doesn't like the idea because he doesn't think he's gonna see any money from it.

That's not the issue.

He's worried that it might confuse the reading public.

That's ridiculous.

Zelda, I need to be writing my next novel right now, not doing screen tests.

[exhale] Excuse me, Alfredo.

Can we just maybe pick this up tomorrow?

Stay, Alfredo.

We're going to finish this right now.

Zelda...

This was supposed to be our special thing.

I can't be in the pictures, darling girl.

But there's no reason you can't.

[ashtray clatters]

2 cents.

Yeah.

No one's going to want me without Scott.

So we'll get someone else to play Amory.

Doug Fairbanks, Barrymore.

Plenty of fellas can play it.

I haven't acted since I was a child.

What do you want to do, Zelda?

Man: All right, roll film.

And action.

Tilt your head.

Chin up.

Smile.

All right, cut.

Was that all right?

Sure, sure.

Listen, we're gonna take a minute, sweetheart, and change the lens, come in for the close-up.

Should I offer to smoke or something?

I've been practicing...

Oh, no need.

No, just... just be yourself, Zelda.

Standing here all alone, I...

And these lights are so hot.

I didn't realize.

You look beautiful.

Okay, you ready, sweetheart?

All right, roll film.

Action.

Look to your left.

Chin up.

You're in Montgomery, Zelda.

You're at a dance at the country club.

You bought that dress special for that occasion.

And, even if your mama doesn't, you know the boys will love it.

And the band just started to play your favorite song.

You can't wait to show that dance card.

Now the most beautiful boy you have ever seen just walked in.

And you know you have to have him.

Minnie: A real motion picture. Heavens.

Well, just a screen test.

They have to write a scenario and all first, so it'll be ages from now, but yes, that's the idea.

Mama, I was so nervous.

But then, all of a sudden, it all felt natural, like maybe this is meant to be.

Mama, I really think I can do this.

And what does Scott think of it all?

You're his wife now, baby. You have obligations.

Well, it's his story, Mama, so of course he's thrilled.

Oh, it's so exciting, Zelda.

We'll be first in line to see it. It's...

A thousand chairs couldn't keep us away.

Even Daddy? You think he'd come?

Your father loves you, baby.

Mama, I miss you.

Tell me what's blooming in the garden.

Oh, well, the common areolas have practically taken over the whole backyard.

Mama, I got to go.

I love you. Pick some mums.

Be good, Zel...

♪♪ [Dixieland jazz]

It's quite amusing.

Do you really think that I'm ready to go to some museum?

More like an exhibit.

Ah, yeah. The Exhibit of Fitzgerald the Young.

Glass-front display, lobby of Scribner's.

Excellent. I have just the piece.

Lieutenant Fitzgerald's m*llitary grade overseas cap.

Never worn overseas.

Oh. Don't forget this.

A must for any Fitzgerald collection.

[laughter]

Oh, and I submit to you a blank page... pure, pristine.

The empty promise of his great next novel.

[giggling]

Well, I'm glad that you're enjoying yourself at my expense.

I call it like I see it, old man, and you, quite often, don't want to see it.

I always thought that was the root of our friendship.

Hmm.

Despite all that, you have the Irish gift of turning the language into something iridescent and surprising.

Iridescent. Huh.

Guess what. Guess what.

I have the most amazing news.

I'm going to Hollywood.

What?

They want me to come out to the Coast and audition for a new motion picture.

W-Who are they?

The studio, United Artists.

There's this director...

Fred Niblow.

Yes.

Fred Niblow wants to meet me.

He wants me to audition for his new picture.

He thinks I have something.

I can't take all the credit.

Fred was in town.

UA Casting Department shared it with him.

He went gangbusters for our girl.

My girl.

Oh. How are we going to celebrate?

On the rocks or on the bed?

I say both. What are we drinking?

First round's on me.

♪♪ [piano]

You're stunning, darling.

It just fell into your lap, just like that.

I'm excited for you.

Well, United Artists did like my... my audition.

[chuckle] Indeed.

Now you're going to be a screen luminary.

A hell of a career.

What am I supposed to do?

Just chase you around the country and live off your money?

Scott.

To my enchanting, entrancing Zelda.

No training, no experience.

But instant success.

Want something to write about?

Here we go, gentlemen.

Mr. Scott Fitzgerald.

Whoo!

Ha!

Come on. Ah!

I've got a name for you.

New name.

Sinclair Lewis.

S-I-N-C...

S-I-N-C-lair Lewis.

Fitzgerald, people came to see the girls...

Sinclair...

...not you. Let's go.

Get your hands off me.

Let's go.

Get... [grunting]

[gasping]

Get your predatory hands off my wife.

And my novel.

[music resumes]

Zelda?

I need to find my coat.

I got to find my wife.

Sir?

Sir.

There you are.

Hmm?

I just needed some fresh air.

Give me a cigarette.

That man in there?

I don't know who that is.

Hey, Zelda, I fear we may have ridden him a little hard tonight.

It seems we hit a nerve.

He never took any of this movie talk seriously.

Townsend's the one who thought I could act.

Townsend's the one who tried to make it happen.

Townsend had his own interests at heart.

Does he think I can't do it without him?

I think it's more the case he doesn't think he can do what he does without you.

He's scared, Zelda.

You're the only one who keeps him from spinning out of control.

He'd be lost without you.

That's not fair.

Isn't that what you signed up for?

♪♪ [jazz]

Scott.

I'm sorry.

I messed everything up.

♪♪ [song intro]

♪ Yes, sir, that's my baby ♪
♪ No, sir, don't mean maybe ♪
♪ Yes, sir, that's my baby now ♪
♪ Yes, ma'am, we've decided ♪
♪ No, ma'am, we won't hide it ♪
♪ Yes, ma'am, you're invited now ♪
♪ By the way ♪
♪ Yes, by the way ♪
♪ By the way ♪
♪ And by the way ♪
♪ When I see that preacher, I'll say ♪

What'll you say, boy?

Hey, hey!

♪ Yes, sir, that's my baby ♪
♪ No, sir, don't mean maybe ♪
♪ Yes, sir, that's my baby now ♪