03x08 - In The Same Figure, Like The King That's Dead

[bunniefuu]

Previously on The Royals...

I'm a journalist, Mr. Frost.

I'm working on a story about Her Royal Highness Princess Eleanor and the relationship she's having with her bodyguard.

James? Did he say where he was going?

No, he didn't.

He simply asked for some time away.

His name is Brandon Boone, 24 years old, m*llitary.

Prince Robert was k*lled.

By you.

There's no need for that.

I think there is.

It's been established.

Good morning, Your Majesty.

Do you want to have sex?

Put 'em up, Sparrow!

Just trying to give them a good show.

You give them a good show. I'll give them a good fight.

I think I've solved our bodyguard issue.

Oh, have you now, Princess?

Yes. Rosie.

I'm Sebastian. This is my number.

If you want to hang out...

It wouldn't be a date.

I've heard all about you, Mr. Parker.

The charming, fabulously wealthy American investor.

I have cancer, and it appears to be winning.

Good fight, big brother.

Did you think you'd actually b*at me?

You want to find out?

(BIG BEN CHIMES)

♪ This is why I can't stop ♪
♪ This is why I can't stop ♪

Hey.

Sparrow.

Don't call me that.

- But I won't apologize either.

For what?

Being the person I've become since you left.

I will fight for you.

(GRUNTS)

Stay down, Sparrow.

Letting you go and being away from you has been impossible for me.

But you have a future with me, unless you tell me to stop.

I know it hurts.

(SHOUTS, BLOWS)

♪ This is why I can't stop ♪
♪ This is why I can't stop ♪
♪ This is why I can't stop ♪
♪ This is why I can't stop ♪

(LEON: LEON'S LULLABY PLAYING)

♪ You're for me the only one ♪

Hi! Damn it...

I'm not supposed to speak unless you speak to me first.

Sorry. Right. (CLEARS THROAT)

Sorry.

Hi.

You can speak now.

Thanks! Hi.

Stop. Don't worry about it.

Nice shoes.

Yeah, I know.

I just thought heels are completely impractical, and my only flats are brown.

Just in case I'm on my feet all day I should wear something practical, but now I'm wearing them, I feel like I coach a women's basketball team.

Right.

Not that anything's wrong with that.

I totally suck at this.

Yeah, you do. You really do so far.

Though you've chosen your footwear wisely, you're a tad overdressed for today's activity.

Which is?

Naked tiger run.

Well, mostly naked.

Not really naked, right?

Well, yes, people will be naked, as in completely naked.

But not us, right?

I assume Her Majesty hasn't yet called?

No, sir.

Your Majesty?

Enjoying the view?

It's lovely.

Yeah, it certainly is.

Whose shirt is this?

Where did you get that?

Prince Robert's?

No. It's Liam's.

You are such a slut.

From before.

I spilt something on it. I had to get it cleaned.

That's my move.

You spill something on his shirt, so he has to take it off... though I normally go for the trousers.

It wasn't a move. I was just... being clumsy.

Clumsy and selfish.

Two princes!

Just one prince.

And one... oh, one stupid girl holding her breath, waiting for him to find his brother's shirt, or find out about us.

You didn't know he was still alive.

I'm going to go and return the shirt to Liam and make him try it on, like Cinderella.

(GIGGLES)

Visualize a healthy, healed you.

Can you see this?

All I see is a low-rent shaman with a bird on his head.

Healing your soul is the key to curing your cancer.

How do we do that, heal my soul?

We will fill the four corners of the spirit world with four offerings, the symbolic representation of your heart's desire, a crystal bathed in the light of a full moon, the blood of a powerful predator, and £65,000, preferably in cash.

Kind of pricey for a holy man.

Secure your offerings and we will heal your soul.

It will not be easy.

Don't count me out, birdman.

I am the secret w*apon.

Heart's desire, full moon crystal, blood of a beast...

And £65,000.

If you cure my cancer, I'll pay you in puka shells and patchouli oil, you fine-feathered freak.

Wait here.

Nice place.

Good location. You're out of milk, by the way.

Do I at least get breakfast in bed?

No.

Let's talk about Dubai.

I'm not ashamed of my past.

Oh, so you've told Brady all about it?

You need to go.

Cute kid.

Get out.

How old is he now, eight?

I'm calling the police.

And telling them what?

That you ran dr*gs for a low-rent sheikh?

Or, in the grand scheme of things, having dr*gs inside you was more palatable than having the sheikh inside you, which is nothing to be ashamed of.

Are you enjoying yourself?

I was... until you ambled into my path and cost me everything I cared about.

So put your phone down and for once in your stubborn, reckless life, shut your mouth and listen.

You're gonna bury the story about the Princess and me, and in return, I'm gonna give you a story that will provide the foundation of... whatever it is you're trying to become.

What story?

Do we understand each other?

Good.

Hey.

Why would you help me?

Sometimes I wish I could just go back and wipe my past.

Start over.

Well, if I can't have that chance, maybe you can.

So take it.

Where's my security detail?

I feel stupid.

Well, it's not about you, is it?

You were the one who was too afraid to strip off.

I wasn't afraid!

I was just... Where was I supposed to put my g*n?

Don't answer that.

Come on, then.

Sebastian! Hi.

Wow.

No flirting.

Not a date.

Fine.

But have you seen the other Naked Tigers yet?

Let's just say there's plenty of food and very little sun in their habitat.

Oh.

Speaking of...

(CLEARS THROAT)

I think my security should lead the way.

For protection, you know.

Run along.

Mm-hm, mm-hm.

For what it's worth, you really rock those stripes.

A tiger is always in season, Sebastian.

Rarr!

How was Paris?

None of your business.

True, but it is your Lord Chamberlain's business.

I was concerned. I thought...

Well, as long as Your Majesty's okay.

I'm fine.

Very well. I'll be just outside.

Just let me know if you need a break, Your Highness.

I trained in special ops, so this is nothing for me, OK?

Your Highness?

Oh, no.

No, no, no, no.

Tigers never leave their pack!

Hi.

You know, without the event, we're basically an airbrushed spectacle.

I'm always a spectacle.

Thanks for the T-shirt.

You're welcome.

Don't ask where I was keeping the money. Or my phone.

Ohh! (GIGGLES)

How are you doing with the break-up?

Comes and goes.

You know...

I just keep thinking to myself how quickly everything changed, how sudden it all was.

I know something happened. I just don't know what it was.

So maybe it's something you can fix.

Maybe.

There's been so much drama between us, I don't know... I guess at a certain point you have to ask yourself if your worlds are better apart.

You know what might make it better?

Yeah?

Food.

This tiger's starving. Come on.

Okay.

There's your crystal, the blood... and a representation of my heart's desire.

Very nice.

This is gonna cost you more than last time.

Which predator sacrificed this blood?

The most powerful predator of all, the King of England.

Unacceptable.

No refunds.

Same. Good luck.

Not so fast.

Look, I tried to get hold of a tiger, but apparently they don't exist anymore.

What about a fox? Cunning, sly, sneaky.

I suppose a fox would do.

Done. Whatever it takes to b*at this cancer and keep my crown from...

Robert.

Hey.

I owe you an apology.

About the fight, the way I behaved.

It's adrenalin left over from the ring. It's done and forgotten.

It's not just that.

When you were gone, I finally found some direction and meaning and...

It's been a struggle giving that up.

What, you want to be like me?

I can't blame you. I mean, look at me. I'm amazing.

Liam, I get it. I truly do.

And let's talk about how we can make things better for you when I get back.

Right now, I'm off to see Kathryn. Come here.

You're my brother, and I love you.

I always will, no matter what.

Hm!

(LAUGHS)

Pardon the interruption, Your Majesty, but your evening's schedule has been arranged.

Oh, right. Cancel it.

Might I inquire why, Your Majesty?

You might not.

Very well.

Is there something you'd like to say?

With all due respect, Your Majesty, most of my day has been spent covering for you regarding your appearance in Paris.

If I'm gonna lie for you, the least you can do is loop me in.

No, the least I can do is employ you.

It's been a difficult year, Mr. Hoenigsberg.

This morning, for the first time in a long time, I had a great day.

I won't apologize for it.

Selfishly, I thought perhaps Her Majesty had experienced a couple of good days with me.

I refuse to walk on eggshells in my own palace, Mr. Hoenigsberg.

If you can't accept that, you need to think long and hard about your place in this monarchy.

Ma'am.

Oh my God, look how cute he is.

Leave it with me.

So we can play with it?

No, so I can k*ll it.

Its blood is gonna save my life.

No! No, no... Please don't hurt it!

(FOX YELPS)

(CYRUS YELLS, CLATTERING)

It bit me like it was some kind of wild animal.

Your Majesty...

You'd better find it, Hill.

Hunt that monster down. It's a menace.

It's adorable.

I-I'm sorry... what is it?

A fox.

It att*cked me while I was minding my own business.

Probably has rabies.

So where exactly is this fox now?

How the hell would I know?

It ran through my secret door.

So there's a fox loose in the palace?

Oh, it's a little one. It's a cute little baby one.

It's a vicious k*ller.

Very well.

(KNOCK AT DOOR)

Go away. Unless you're from the palace.

Um... I am.

Hi. Is Kathryn here?

No. Are you really from the palace?

Yes. I was just... just, um...

Do you live here?

No, I'm just her sister Angie.

I do come here, eat her food, steal her clothes and things.

Right. Um...

I handle social media for the family.

Um... I'll stop by another time.

Is Kathryn gonna be famous? Make sure you mention me!

Kathryn?

(GASPS)

Oh my gosh! It's you! I can't believe it!

Can we have a picture, please?

Um... okay.

Oh, my mates are gonna be so jealous!

We all loved that dress you wore to the People's Gala.

What's he like, Prince Robert?

Is he as nice as he seems?

He's okay.

(GASPS)

Shall we have a picture together?

Okay. Smile.

One more for luck. There we go.

Thank you!

How are you doing? Nice to meet you.

Hi.

Hello.

For two, please.

I'm afraid we're booked up.

Oh, I...

Could you check again?

I see a nice table right over there.

That table is available, simply not available to the likes of you.

Sorry? The "likes" of us?

Let me just make a call.

You like it?

Er... the truth?

Mm-hm.

Not at all. I thought we were meeting for tea.

We are. Come on.

What's happening?

There's been a change of ownership.

Did you just buy this restaurant?

Yes. We make an amazing beet salad. You're gonna love it.

Ah. Clarence. I'm gonna need your jacket.

Right away, sir.

Chop chop.

(LAUGHS)

Not bad, for the likes of us.

(LAUGHS)

The toughest table in town. But I know a guy.

Once again, a spectacular view.

Trust me. If we're comparing views, mine wins every time.

After you.

(BLIND PILOT: MOON AT DAWN PLAYING)

That was crazy today, wasn't it?

Those girls recognized me.

You'd better get used to that.

I don't know that I would.

Come on. Be honest. Part of you enjoyed being recognized.

What are you thinking about?

The crown. Cyrus won't go easily. The public were intrigued by Liam.

I don't know. Maybe I should just walk away, let the two of them fight over it.

And that would make you happy? Or at least, happier?

Living here in solitude, away from the scrutiny and noise, raising a family and growing old together.

I could do worse.

Could you do better?

Depends who I'm growing old with.

I've been thinking about how you styled the gala.

It was really impressive.

Thank you. Like I said, it was a welcome distraction.

You ever think about making it more than that, designing full-time?

I'm a princess, full-time.

Who says you can't do both?

So... apparently word may have leaked about my purchase and our lunch.

May have leaked? Did leak?

Did leak.

Great... Well, at least I'm dressed for it.

I think you look fabulous.

In the event that you do want to cover that tiger pelt, I made a call and had a few things brought in.

(SNAPS FINGERS)

Clothes for dessert? Delicious. You're good.

You are. You're great.

Black, black, black. Yes, yes.

I love this jacket!

I love this skirt. I love those boots.

Um... the boots are mine. Don't be greedy.

I spent the day with you pretty much naked, and now I'm putting clothes on you.

Hey.

Hey, Boone. Still living the good life, I see.

Yeah, but my luck might change.

You, on the other hand... you'll still have that haircut, Frost.

Let's talk about that, changing your luck.

What if I don't want to talk to you?

You will.

You two know each other?

Yeah. We're old friends.

I can see that.

This is Brandon Boone.

I understand you have a story for me.

No recorders.

And I'll feel more comfortable knowing you aren't wearing a wire.

I'm not wearing a wire.

I'll be the judge of that.

Just for your information...

I knew you weren't wearing a wire.

One of these days, Frost.

Tell her your damn story.

The man who k*lled the last King of England hired me to k*ll the next King of England.

And that's exactly what I did.

At least, I thought I did.

You're the one that crashed Prince Robert's plane?

Yeah. That's right.

I hope you've got enough ink in that pen.

Your Majesty...

You're resigning?

Regrettably, yes.

No you're not.

I can't do it, Helena.

This is the British monarchy, Mr. Hoenigsberg.

The House of Henstridge is about to endure the kind of turbulence that hasn't been experienced since the days of William and Mary.

And you want to resign over a schoolboy crush?

Don't do that.

Don't diminish what this is, what you mean to me.

At Christmas, you said you'd accept any version of me.

Yeah, and I meant it, then.

Then mean it now, for God's sake. I need you here.

You have Jack.

You're my friend.

I don't have many friends, Spencer.

As a matter of fact, I'm... not sure I have any at all.

But for what it's worth, in a very short amount of time, you have become... essential to me.

Important.

So stop being a p*ssy and get back to work.

Did you call me a p*ssy?

Yes. I did.

That's exactly what you're being.

Because I care about you?

Just get back to work.

I don't think I will now.

You would if you care about me.

You see, that is what you do. You twist things and push people away.

I don't push people away!

Said the woman with no friends.

Said the queen with no friends.

Unbelievable.

You're not resigning!

I know that.

♪ I want you ♪
♪ And I always will ♪

You just getting back?

Yeah. Kathryn says hi.

I really missed her. Seems like she's missed me too, which is nice.

I'm sure she did.

Listen, I've been thinking about what you said, and I think I owe you an apology.

I hadn't really considered what you'd gained, and had to give up when I came home.

That wasn't very fair on you.

And it shouldn't be about who was born first.

It should be about who would make the best monarch... for the family, and for the people.

And we both know that's not Cyrus.

But maybe it's not me, either.

Maybe it's you.

So what should we do?

Well, Mum was about to prove your paternity, presumably to place you on the throne.

That's right.

Then we should go and speak with her.

You should tell her exactly how you're feeling, and if she agrees with you, if she truly believes that this is your time, then I'll support that.

I'll stand behind you.

You could do that?

For you?

Of course I could.

No matter what, okay?

Okay.

Right.

Let's go and find out who's going to be the next King of England.

(SEAFRET: OCEANS PLAYING)

You were right.

That's some tale.

It's true.

It means nothing without proof.

I'll get you proof.

How?

Don't worry about it.

He wants to talk to you.

Ready to go?

What do you get out of this?

Silence. You tell your story, she doesn't tell mine.

And that matters to you?

It matters to Eleanor. For Eleanor.

Yeah. Princess.

Tell her I said hello.

I'll find my own way out.

We all do things we regret, you, me, all of us.

We're hardly sympathetic characters in this production.

You do seem to be motivated by something else.

Love.

Maybe there's hope for you yet.

What do you get out of this?

Redemption, maybe.

Besides, there's something else you need to know.

(LAUGHTER)

Princess!

Can I have a word?

Yeah.

Hi.

Oh, no. Have you been crying?

No. (SNIFFS)

I told Miss Hozier it was a sort of princess rite of passage.

Wait, your name's Rosie Hozier?

Uh-uh.

Actually, sneaking off was my idea.

I'm sorry. It wasn't fair to you.

You two, you're a team.

Yeah.

And you're a guest, so act accordingly.

Yes, sir. Sorry, sir.

And no more crying.

Yes! I don't know why I'm crying!

I guess because I let you down and I suck at this job.

I need to be good at things.

If it were a b*ttlefield, someone could have d*ed! I can't let that happen!

Hey, hey.

This is not a b*ttlefield. This is my home.

And it's your home now, too.

Come here, teammate.

Okay.

Tomorrow's a new day, in better shoes.

Yeah. Yeah.

Did you pose for this?

I did, yes.

And all these people posed with you?

Hm.

Ooh, that little guy in the corner is creepy.

Yeah, everybody says that.

(KNOCK AT DOOR)

Apologies for the interruption, Your Majesty.

I took the liberty of performing a background search on your shaman.

His real name is Murray Mathis, and for most of his life, he sold orthopedic shoes in Lewisham.

Why did you trust him anyway?

Because I don't want to die.

I don't want to miss any of it.

Any of what?

Life.

My life.

If I lose, I'm going to k*ll myself.

What?

If I lose the crown, if the Privy Council votes against me...

I'm gonna blow my g*dd*mn brains out.

Don't say that.

It's true.

I've already decided.

I won't let the cancer take me.

The crown is all I have to live for.

(THE STRUMBELLAS: SHOVELS & DIRT PLAYING)

♪ Well, it ain't worth living if you don't get hurt ♪
♪ I got a head full of darkness and darkness is good ♪
♪ 'Cause if we all die young then we don't get hurt ♪

Your Majesty, could we speak to you?

Is calling me Mummy suddenly too informal?

For this, it may be.

Liam and I have been talking. And well... perhaps you should hear this from him.

I know I haven't always been the son you needed me to be, or... wanted me to be.

But when Robert left, and Dad was k*lled, I tried to become someone you could believe in, someone England could believe in.

And you did. You have. #KingLiam bears that out.

You have been nothing short of miraculous.

Why? What's going on?

Before Robert came back, you were positioning me to be the ruling monarch.

The people were excited about it, and so was I.

I was ready, Mum.

I was ready to rule this kingdom, and I still am.

When the Council meets, I want you to put me forward as the next king.

Not Cyrus... not Robert.

Me.

Robert will support it, and so will the people.

I know it in my heart.

Will you support it as well, Mum?

Mum?

No.

This is Robert's time.

And no matter how we got here, no matter what transpired along the way, this has always been Robert's destiny.

When we face the Privy Council, we need to be a family, resolute and unified in our support of Robert.

Liam...

I love you very much.

But this is Robert's time.

Do you understand that?

Yeah.

(DOOR SLAMS)

How could you put me in that position?

You mean, deferring to you out of respect?

I mean deferring to me out of some kind of passive-aggressive cowardice!

You tell him you'll support him as king, then make me the bad guy!

And I meant what I said.

If you'd have chosen Liam, I would have supported him.

But we both know he's not ready.

And knowing that, you put it on me, which absolves you of all of it.

I suppose it does.

And treacherous as that seems, you said it yourself, we need to be unified as a family if we're going to take the crown off Uncle Cyrus.

Liam needed to hear that.

But he didn't need to hear it from his brother, the person stood in his spotlight, the person who he now has to support.

I respect your point.

Reluctantly, I agree with it.

But I don't respect your methods.

This was an ambush, a manipulation, and I won't be manipulated.

Do you understand me?

Yes, Mum.

Yes, Your Majesty.

Regardless of your methods, it's done.

It's time to focus on the task at hand.

Cyrus's reign is nearly over.

Long live King Robert.

Long live the Queen.

(MICHAEL KIWANUKA: I'LL NEVER LOVE PLAYING)

♪ Leave me cold ♪
♪ Troubled song in the moonlight ♪

(SIGHS)

♪ Will be my bride ♪

Do you wanna talk about it?

Not really.

Okay.

(TEXT MESSAGE ALERT)

♪ I'll never need somebody ♪

Perfect.

Maybe that's what you need to see.

She's moving on, you can move on and never look back.

You give some sh*t advice sometimes, you know that?

"She's moving on"?

Eleanor had a date today.

What, with who?

Just some naked prince.

You tell me. That help you?

No, you're right. That was sh*t advice. It just actually made it so much worse.

I had fun today. Thank you for buying me the T-shirt and the clothes, and the restaurant.

Ah, it was the least I could do. It was a good day.

Thanks for being naked for most of it.

It's the least I could do.

So I... I guess this would be the part where I would kiss you, if this were a date.

But it wasn't.

Okay. That's fair.

But just so you know, tigers mate for life.

Do they now?

No, I just made that up.

But this one does.

Sebastian, I meant what I said at the gala.

I really just need a friend right now.

Then you have one.

Thanks for today. Thanks for trusting me.

All the proof you need is on this drive.

It's confidential.

And most likely treasonous on your part.

If you get caught you'll go to prison.

Is she worth it?

She is.

I'll take a look, and if the story's true, I'll destroy the file on you and the princess, deal?

Actually, there's someone I wanted you to check out for me.

Sebastian Idrisi?

A contender for the Princess's heart?

Not if I can help it.

I want to make sure things are in order with the Privy Council.

I'm the King of England, and following the tribunal I expect to remain the King of England.

Represent yourself well, make a good accounting, and you'll keep your crown.

God save the King.

God can suck it. You save the King, Wescott, and the King will save you.

(ERIK JONASSON: LIKE A FUNERAL PLAYING)

♪ And you said ♪
♪ You know, it's just like a funeral ♪

Hey.

Nice pic you posted of Robert on his date.

(SIGHS)

Just doing my job.

Whatever.

Not whatever.

I told you I wouldn't take this job if it got in the way of us, because I was being a good friend, which is more than you've been lately.

What's that supposed to mean?

It means you could have told me about you and Kathryn.

I couldn't tell you.

You could have.

And you could have trusted me. That's what friends do.

But instead you chose not to. So either you don't trust me, or you don't consider me a friend.

At that point, I'm just an employee doing my job, so don't give me any grief about it when I do.

Willow...

I told you I wouldn't be the girl waiting for you to show up, Liam.

And yet here I am, waiting for you to show up.

I can't do it. I won't.

I never asked you to.

Fine.

Don't.

Have a good night...

Your Highness.

♪ And we started to kiss ♪
♪ For one last time ♪
♪ All my light ♪
♪ Turned to darkness ♪
♪ All my gold ♪
♪ Turned to sorrow ♪
♪ All I knew ♪
♪ Was a lie ♪
♪ All I need ♪
♪ Is just in front of me ♪