05x12 - Long Term Parking

Episode transcripts for the TV show "The Sopranos". Aired January 10, 1999 - June 10, 2007.*
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Tony Soprano, a New Jersey-based Italian-American mobster, faces difficulties as he tries to balance his family life with his role as the leader of a criminal organization.
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05x12 - Long Term Parking

Post by bunniefuu »

(♪ "Woke Up This Morning" by Alabama 3)

Walter, hey, you looking for me? The Crazy Horse, that's you, right? - Yeah, you got something? - Yeah, pole camera, three days ago.

She locks up the club for the night.

She's throwing away the garbage.

Yeah? But then she changes her mind.

Interesting.

The good news is no polyps.

The bad news is, as you can see, you've got a fairly severe case of ulcerative colitis.

- Jesus Christ.

- She was getting better.

Then last week, another flare-up.

How about the Prozac? Is it helping? She can't even sleep.

Look at her.

I'd like to start you on a regime of Prednisone.

It's a steroid.

- Like for weightlifters? - I've had great success treating this type of condition.

I do need to warn you, there are certain side effects.

These are temporary, but there's a chance of weight gain, accompanied by Cushing's Syndrome, a swelling of the facial features.

- Sort of a moon face.

- What? You've seen Jerry Lewis in the last year or two? She's planning a wedding, for Christ's sake! It was fine one day, then suddenly audio and no picture.

- Somebody been fooling around with this? - AJ had his friends over.

How'd he do over there with your dad? - Raking the driveway? - Fine.

Except my mother kept asking him if we were getting back together.

You know, I dreamed that I moved back in here.

You know, just for the record I realise what I did was wrong.

My activities while I lived here.

Knowing you were wrong isn't the half of it.

Oh, really? What's the other half? Well, suppose something did happen where theoretically, we did get back together.

- Any marriage would need fidelity.

- Like Popeye says, "I am what I am.

" Well, I didn't marry a cartoon.

Well, it wouldn't be a cartoon.

You had your own indiscretions yourself.

- The thing with Furio? - I did not sleep with him, Tony.

I'm just saying that we're all human, that's all.

You know, the truth is, I got myself where I am.

But your open indiscretion, total disregard You're right, it was it was horrible.

A knot in your stomach when the phone rings.

Like you were saying, you know.

Theoretically though, if we do reconcile, that stuff will never happen again.

- Come on, you gonna go or what? - I was finishing my drink.

f*ck! You can't stay holed up here.

- That's not healthy, Carmine.

- How'd it get to this? Retaliation, counterattacks We're at a f*ckin' stagmire.

We back down now, bunker down, what kind of a message does that send? Not just to Johnny's people, either.

Billy Leotardo.

What the hell was that? This Blundetto assh*le went off the reservation.

All due respect, Carmine, that's why you need to get out there, put your ear to the street, let the guys see you take the reins.

That's not how I wanna handle it.

Hey, don't get me wrong, I always liked your cousin, but whacking Phil's brother was a major poke in the ass.

You know my cousin almost cried when I put him in charge of the casino? After all I did for that blue-eyed prick, then he completely fucks me over.

Now I practically gotta get down on my knees to Johnny Sack.

Where the f*ck you been? Highway was jammed with broken heroes on a last-chance power drive.

Oh, you're gonna get f*ckin' cute now.

- Anything on Tony B? - Nah, he's still on a milk carton.

There she is.

My Smelly Valentine.

Christopher, that's not funny.

What the f*ck are you doing? I can handle a cocktail once in a while.

You guys OK? You need anything else? - You're still feeling sick, hon? - Please.

They gotta replace her colon with a semi-colon.

Maybe you should be a vegan.

- Doctor says I gotta relax.

- From what? She's got the world at her feet, she walks around like impending doom.

Come on, we gotta go.

Take it easy, now.

Don't listen.

People who've got their health take it for granted.

How's your thing with? Just gotta keep an eye on it, that's all.

So, Carm and me are getting back together, maybe.

That's great.

The kids'll be thrilled.

Yeah.

When we get settled, we'll have you guys over Family dinner.

Feel better, huh? John.

First off, let me just say how sorry I am for your loss.

We all are.

Take your f*ckin' sorrys and stick 'em in your ass.

I could say nothing, be a heartless prick.

He tried to talk, he couldn't even say his last words.

Anybody ever die in your arms, you cocksucker? A family member, somebody you love? - No.

- Well, give it time.

See if I can't make that happen for you.

- That's enough.

- Philly, why don't you go have a drink? Don't tell me what to do, Jimmy.

Jimmy's right.

f*ck 'em, John.

f*ck all of them! Was that f*ckin' necessary? He shouldn't even have been here.

He's got a right to be here.

He's got a right to a lot of things right now.

My cousin acted alone.

I did not sanction this.

The lone-gunman theory.

You know how close he and Angelo were in the can.

He flipped the f*ck out! When he whacked Joey, what flipped him out then? What do ya want, John? What do ya want me to say? I want your cousin on a f*cking spit! I don't know where he is.

- Nobody does.

- Fine.

Maybe one of your other relatives then.

What, I gotta stand here being threatened now? All right, nobody's making threats.

Look, Tony's in hiding.

You either deliver that prick to my door or I will rain a shitstorm down on you and your family like you have never f*cking seen.

We're done here.

There are over 200,000 species of molluscs, and right there is a good example of a conch, which is also known as a knobbed whelk.

See, these raised spines That's what I call my d*ck.

I heard that.

That's just nasty.

Oh, f*ck! Yo, check it! Oh, sh*t! Hurry up! Don't touch it! Apprentice Delaney, get back here! Little Meadow in a bridal gown.

Couple more years, Grandma and Grandpa.

Bite your tongue.

So, the other day, what you said, I processed it.

You know, your feelings.

It really hit home with me, finally.

With you out of the house, I've had a chance to do a lot of thinking.

I mean, it's partly my fault but I need something else in my life.

You know, with Meadow getting engaged, AJ almost You want another kid.

No.

It turns out there is a lot for sale over on Crestview, a little over an acre.

I was thinking I could build a spec house and take my dad in as a partner.

I mean, my allowance is what it is, but - How much is the lot? - 600,000.

Anyway, he would oversee the construction.

Well, I'll call Ginsberg and have him free up a down payment.

And then? I'll move back in.

Supposing that happened, what about the other issues that were on the table? Well I swear to you, on our children, that my midlife crisis problems will no longer intrude on you any more.

Are you having dinner? - Have you settled on a caterer yet? - Can I talk to you? - You hear from Tony? - I talked to Kelvin Calvin whatever.

That redneck from North Carolina.

The Bureau of Alcohol and Tobacco called.

A bodega in Newark's selling cigarettes without tax stamps.

Stupid sp*cs were supposed to stamp 'em themselves.

The feds are all over it now.

I don't got enough on my f*ckin' mind? - Any idea how you're gonna handle that? - Handle what? Our cousin, you know, Phil and John.

I don't know, I gotta think about it.

From now on, Paulie supervises the cigarette run.

You split everything with him.

- What? - You f*ckin' heard me.

I got a f*ckin' wedding to pay for.

Well, if I were you, I'd cut out the open bar! f*ck this piece of sh*t.

I'm done! You hear me? Put my life on the line! My f*ckin' life! Baby, I hate seeing you like this.

f*ck family, f*ck loyalty.

You cost him a dime, you're a f*ckin' pariah.

I gave that f*ck pieces of my soul, Adriana.

You know what he said to me? - He said I should have a f*ckin' drink! - When? Up there, when we were up at Uncle Pat's farm.

You don't need to listen to him.

Isn't that why you have a sponsor? Him and Tony B, breaking my balls, teasing me like when I was little.

What kind of f*cked-up, undermining sh*t is that to tell someone who's got the disease? You know I could take him out in a second, that fat f*ck.

Bang! His kids wouldn't even give a sh*t.

Don't talk like that.

You're a better man than he is, a better person.

f*ck all this sh*t with Paulie.

You know what hurts me worse, right to my heart? Him and our ass-wipe cousin, that two-faced cocksucker.

He could get us all k*lled with New York and him Tony has to think about what to do with him now, after all this sh*t! Me, he don't need to f*ckin' think! Well, maybe I need to think! Ever thought of that, you fat f*ckin' scumbag? That's the guy, Adriana.

My uncle Tony.

The guy I'm going to hell for.

- Long Branch cops.

- What do you think? Not your average bulls detectives.

Call the Long Branch PD, find out what's up.

So, you all set? - Don't look at me.

- Why? Ya look good! And you're gonna look nice with the short hair.

Like whatshername - That actress.

- Just take me home.

I can drop you off, but I really can't stay.

Why not? All right, look.

First off, like I said before, as far as all the medical bills and the prescriptions, that's covered, ad nauseam.

- You m*therf*cker.

- Hey, take it easy.

This is how you leave me? I'm almost b*rned to death cooking you a f*cking snack? You could've been making yourself something.

- Am I that f*ckin' horrible now? - No.

You're not horrible at all.

I'm going back to my wife.

You selfish f*ck.

I hate you.

There's just no future with us, I told you that from the get-go.

That's why I didn't want you hitching your wagon to my star.

You'll heal up.

You'll meet somebody else.

f*ck you! I didn't come here to fight, I came here to pick you up and end this like a gentleman.

I'm gonna f*ckin' k*ll myself.

I gotta take this.

Is that you? I know you're there, just say something.

Where the f*ck are? Your call cannot be - The Bing.

- Yeah, it's me.

Have your friend at the phone company call me.

- Who, Gerard? - I want to put traps on all my lines.

Jesus.

What? - We need to talk.

- I was buying medicine.

- This way, please.

- But my car! Hello? Give me a hand, will you? I got more stuff in the car, so - Where should I put it? - In the bedroom.

Oh, you made it.

Hey, I was just starting dinner.

Yeah, it smells good.

- What is this? - I got you something small.

Oh, this is beautiful! With my black coat.

It's a Herm�s.

Supposed to be the best.

There's the whipped butter too, if you like.

This is all right.

This is f*ckin' weird.

- AJ - No, he's right.

It is f*ckin' weird.

You know what? We should celebrate.

Here, give me your glass.

The trick is, you gotta hold the cork, don't let it fly out.

Gab's uncle got a detached retina at his retirement party.

He never saw outta that eye again.

That's festive.

I wanna make a toast.

To the people I love.

Nothing else matters.

Hear, hear.

Slow down.

You're supposed to savour it.

It's important in life.

- Open the door for Mr Mucklel - What? - Open the door for Mr Muckle the blind man.

- Call 'em off my kumquatsl - What'd you say? - Kumquatsl Wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

It's all right.

It's all right.

All right.

- So? - I was throwing the garbage out.

So what? Isn't that illegal anyway, to film people without telling 'em? And the reason you didn't just leave the garbage in the dumpster? Bills and stuff.

Our account numbers were on it.

- Friend of yours? - Jesus Christ.

His name is Gilbert Nieves.

Partial traces of an infrared stamp on his hand from The Crazy Horse.

I don't know him.

You told the police that he was at the club that night.

Let me ask you a question, Miss La Cerva.

Do you really think we don't know what's in that garbage bag? He was stabbed in the club.

You tried to dispose of the evidence.

- I didn't do nothing.

- Miss La Cerva.

I suggest in the strongest possible terms that you start telling us what you know.

There's this guy, his name's Matush.

He's a drug dealer.

He did it.

I swear, not me.

What's Matush's last name? I don't know.

He's foreign, the Mid East or something Pakistan.

Anyway, Christopher don't let him deal in the club, but once in a while he'd sell me some X or whatever.

This is my friend Kamal.

Listen, I need a favour.

We're trying to get an apartment.

I gotta fax a copy of my passport.

- You can't go to Kinko's? - The guy's waiting.

Two seconds, I swear.

It's in the office, but hurry.

If Christopher sees you, he'll sh*t.

That's for you.

This guy was at the club, the dead guy, but I never saw him before.

Matush said he sold him coke once, but the guy said Matush ripped him off, it was all laxative.

Oh, boy.

What's the number again? Hey, yo, you can't be back here, man.

Cool out, yo! What are ya doing? - Give me my money.

- What? Don't get stupid in here.

f*ck off, I got no beef with you.

You still sell that b*at sh*t, huh? f*ckin' baby powder? - Look, I don't know - Get him! I'll k*ll you m*therf*ckers! I'll k*ll you! Oh, my God! We had to wait till later to get out the mops and stuff, after we closed up.

- If Christopher - Nobody has to know anything.

- But you don't f*ckin' understand! - It's cool, OK? We'll take him out through the basement.

Dump him in the ocean.

Why'd you help this Matush? I wasn't helping him, I was afraid for myself.

Besides, he's nice.

I don't know.

I didn't wanna see him get into trouble.

- Sounds like a real sweetheart.

- The guy was gonna s*ab him! He's not a bad person.

He's very religious.

- Religious? - He prays, like, all the time.

He went through a period of rediscovering his religion.

He don't even do dr*gs any more, he just deals.

Every month he sends all his money home to his family.

- In Pakistan? - His brother runs a prep school.

Some place for young boys.

I was very impressed with that.

He's buckled down.

He's much more serious as a person.

- Does Christopher know what happened? - No! Are you crazy? You're guilty of obstructing an ongoing investigation into a drug-related homicide.

You are looking at 25 years.

- But I didn't do nothing.

- Take your head out of your ass.

- You knew what you were doing.

- We can arrest you now, have you charged, send you over to the women's house of detention.

Or in the alternative you can cooperate.

But I've been f*ckin' cooperating! You've been giving us sh*t, and I've had it! I want you wired up! I want Tony Soprano on tape! - Your boyfriend too! - No, I'm not doing it! Then you're all out of options! I wanna talk to my lawyer.

Fine, who's your lawyer? I don't have an official one.

- Maybe Christopher knows a good lawyer.

- Oh, you f*ckin' piece of sh*t.

I'll call the Public Defender, they'll send someone down.

Might take awhile, though, this hour of the night.

I think I left some shoes over there.

I can iron these tomorrow.

- What for? Send 'em to the cleaners.

- I kinda miss it actually.

My wrist is getting weak.

- I could help you there.

- Get outta here.

No, let's give it some exercise.

- What? - Stop.

Hi, it's Ade.

Ma, if this is you, another gift for the registry could be a decanter.

It's me.

Where are you? We may be doing it at our house.

We've only got the one leaf for 16 people.

Could you do a buffet? Maybe set a card table up for the kids? It's our first holiday.

Ronnie wants us all together.

Ade? It's been 40 minutes.

How long you gonna stay in there? How long will you let me go without a lawyer? I told you, they're backed up.

We left four messages.

Eight f*ckin' hours I've been here already.

- Jesus Christ, look at me.

- You want some coffee? I can't, my stomach.

I wish you'd think about our offer.

It's not a bad deal.

I won't wear a wire, I told you.

It's bad enough how I betrayed him already.

It's not too late to have a future, Ade.

There are other options.

Don't start with the Witness Protection again.

You love each other.

You have your health.

Yeah, right.

Living like this is what's costing you your insides.

- I really need a cigarette.

- OK.

Come on.

There's no way she'll wear a wire, but she might get Moltisanti to flip.

- Why now? - Problems with Tony.

- Christopher hates him.

- That's confirmed by wiretaps.

Cl12 mentioned it too.

Something to do with Tony Blundetto, the cousin.

- What would Moltisanti want? - I'm not sure.

- He's got some interest in screenwriting.

- Put in a call to Sam Goldwyn.

Promise her anything? Depending on what he's offering, maybe immunity and relocation for the two of them.

She's got to understand that if she won't wear a wire, we can't offer her protection or surveillance.

- I explained all that.

- She's got till 9am Monday to bring him in or we turn her over to Long Branch PD.

Tone, you got a call.

Jimmy Petrille, Brooklyn.

- Hello.

- It's me.

That tennis match with those guys? My guy won.

- Oh, yeah? - The other one, the son.

- He dropped out.

- What, he got hurt? Nothing like that.

Settled, that's all.

All right.

- Little Carmine's out.

- He's dead? Seems like him and Johnny worked out a deal.

I knew he'd cave.

He's a f*ckin' p*ssy, that kid.

Johnny Sack, boss of a family.

Time was it would've been great for us to have John as the boss.

Smart as a f*ckin' whip.

He used to be a pragmatist.

Some people are better at being number twos.

You thought John had an ego before? Forget it now.

- Did you sleep? - A little.

- So where the f*ck you been? - Christopher, we need to talk.

- I asked you a question, Adriana.

- I know.

There's something I need to tell you.

- It's that f*ckin' Bobby DeMarco? - No! Please, Christopher.


I gotta get through this.

About a year ago more maybe, I don't know - I was arrested.

- For what? What are you talking about? - For dr*gs.

- Where, at the club? - You remember my friend Danielle? - She set you up? She was an FBI agent, Christopher.

She lied to me.

They wanted to arrest you too, Christopher.

I was just trying to protect you.

They said all they wanted was some information and they would leave us alone.

I didn't tell them nothing, I swear to God Just licence plates, some other stupid sh*t.

They wanted me to wear a wire, but I wouldn't do it.

But now there was a m*rder, Christopher, and they know about it.

At the club, Matush and some other guy.

I tried to cover it up, but I had no choice.

They've been filming us in the parking lot.

We're dead, you know that? What did you do, huh? How could you f*ckin' do this to us? I f*ckin' loved you! I'm sorry.

My God! What are we gonna do? Careful here, my son.

- Hello.

- T, it's me.

You awake? I know you're mad, OK? I'm sorry.

When I heard about Angelo I just Don't say it.

Not on the phone.

I know, I won't.

- What should I do? - I'll tell you what not to do.

- That's come back around here.

- I know.

I know, but my kids, my boys.

Don't worry.

I'll look after them.

Yeah, well, that's that's why I'm calling, to ask Sure, why not? Anything else I can do for you? I don't know what to say, cuz.

I'm leaving you with sh*t in your lap.

- Hello? - The night you went away, you know, 17 years ago, I told you that I got jumped by a couple of shines.

That's why I didn't show.

It was all bullshit.

I got in a fight with my mother and passed out.

- What do you mean? - I don't know.

It was like a panic att*ck.

I went down like a house of cards and I cracked my f*ckin' skull open.

Why are you telling me all this? I felt guilty about it all these years, like it was my fault you went away.

Anyway, now we're even.

So the casino, all that sh*t you did for me is cos of that? You just take care of yourself, all right? You too.

Hello? Gerard, it's me.

- He just called.

- Give me a sec, I'll dump the line.

- You got a pen? - Yeah, yeah, go ahead.

He's at Roy's.

It's a business, Kinderhook, New York.

That's upstate.

Yeah, I know where it is.

Thanks.

- Hello? - Uncle Pat.

- How's life at the old folks' home? - I don't like the people here.

- Do you know what time it is? - I thought you were a night owl.

Did I hear a rumour there was a problem up there at the farm? The g*dd*mn developer.

Some environmental crap.

They can't start the demolition without some special permit.

And the house is sitting there empty, damn it.

Remember that that time at Lake George, how you loved it? We could live someplace like that, maybe.

- You could start writing again.

- I could do my memoirs, finally.

And we'd have a fireplace like you like too.

We could never come back here, Adriana.

I don't wanna come back.

I just want you.

You couldn't even see your mother again.

You want some eggs? I need to clear my head.

- You didn't even sleep.

- This is a lot to process.

I gotta think.

I'll be back in a little while.

Stay, wait.

I'm gonna get cigarettes.

I'll be right back.

Smoke mine.

Don't smoke.

- Next you're gonna want a vodka.

- What? Come on.

I love you, baby.

I love you.

Hello.

- He wants to do it.

- Great, when are you coming in? A couple hours.

We'll get some things together.

That's not what we said, Ade.

Please, if I push him he'll say no.

I know how he is.

I'm serious, Adriana.

You've got till one o'clock.

- Hello? - Yeah, it's me.

Look, everything's OK.

Jesus, I don't even know how to say this.

It's Christopher.

He tried to commit su1c1de.

- My God, is he all right? - He's fine.

He was up by Ramapo, apparently he took some pills.

A trooper found him in a bathroom of this diner.

They brought him to the hospital.

His mom's on her way up there now.

Did he say anything to you? I mean, did he appear suicidal? - No.

- Are you sure? His mom said he's very upset about something.

Anyway, I'm on my way up there now.

I'm gonna send Sil by to pick you up then, OK? - Jesus Christ.

- You know he's been drinking.

He's probably fighting that heroin urge again.

- Anyway, Sil's on his way.

- OK.

All right.

I'll see ya up there.

I'd stop to eat, but I don't wanna get to the hospital after Tony.

I'm not hungry.

They'll keep him a few days, maybe.

Observation, do some tests, who knows? He's a strong kid.

He's tough, very resilient.

Why are you crying? He's gonna be fine.

- No, please! - Come on.

Come on.

- Where you f*ckin' going? - Please! Come on, come on! f*ckin' c**t! - Please! No.

- Come out of there.

This is long-term parking only.

Due to increased security, cars being reclaimed in less than 14 days must be left in lots L, M or N.

This is long-term parking only.

Due to increased security, cars being reclaimed in less than 14 days must be left in lots L, M or N.

The King of New York.

- Congratulations.

- Thanks, Tony.

You deserve it.

I want you to know this is the last time we'll meet like this.

It's undignified.

So, what's the word on your cousin? I think I know where he's holed up.

And? I know this has to be done, John, but I'm asking you now as a friend.

- Let me handle this myself.

- I can't do that, Tony.

You can do whatever the f*ck you want, you're the f*ckin' boss.

I choose not to, then.

I want your promise it'll be quick.

I'm not gonna lie to you, Tony, I don't have to.

Phil's gonna do it, and he'll do it his way.

This is me now.

Come on.

Anything else? No.

You know what, John? I'll give you undignified.

Go f*ck yourself.

You and Phil and whoever.

He's my f*ckin' cousin.

- You all right? - This is some funny sh*t.

What the f*ck is wrong with you? I snorted a little H.

I know, but I can't stand the pain.

I loved her.

f*ckin' pain, huh? You think you're alone in this? It was a judgment call.

She sounded OK.

The status on Moltisanti? Seen yesterday leaving the Bing with Tony.

- Should we bring him in? - That'll get us nothing.

She really could have fled.

She could be in China by now.

How should we handle the Nieves m*rder? We have the terror possibility.

Take it over from the Long Branch PD.

Well, what did I say, is it beautiful? Yeah, it's a gorgeous piece of land.

With this view, it's well worth 600,000.

The surveyor's coming on Tuesday.

- You all right? - Yeah.

Me? Yeah.

Absolutely.
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