05x13 - All's Well That Ends Well

Episode transcripts for the TV show "iZOMBiE". Aired March 2015 - August 2019.*
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A Seattle Medical Resident and M.D. finds that being a zombie and eating brains allows her to help the police solve murders. Based on the comix by Chris Roberson and Michael Allred.
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05x13 - All's Well That Ends Well

Post by bunniefuu »

[Liv]

Previously on iZombie See, your boyfriend took something that was mine.

I'm not letting you take them.

You don't have a choice.

[S.

Cavanaugh]

Stephen Kinney.

Reported missing a few weeks back.

You can die Or you can live to fight for zombie-kind.

[Enzo]

I am Enzo Lambert, the new commander of Fillmore Graves.

Starting today, terror will be met with terror.

It's w*r.

Major, it's me.

We got the formula and we're heading back.

We just need the Max Rager from Fillmore Graves, and then We've got the cure.

Don't worry.

I'll get it.

[Enzo on PA]

Citizens of New Seattle, the free-zombie state of Seattle is now under new command.

I assure you, peace and order will soon be at hand.

My predecessor believed in the carrot.

We've reached a point at which I believe the stick delivers better results.

Humans must put down their weapons.

Those who fail to do so will be ex*cuted.

Those who surrender during battle will be scratched - and then starved.

- Hey.

Listen, are you still working over at KCEW?

All clear, Lieutenant.

Can't be too careful.

Thanks.

Check the deck.

Lieutenant Gordon Philips.

Five of Clubs.

Not bad.

I would sure love to get rid of some of these high cards.

What about Renegade and Lillywhite?

We got eyes on them?

Afraid not.

Renegade could've got him out of town.

No.

They're not sitting this out.

Tweet out her work address.

Let's flush her out.

Until they show up, let's go for the new King of Spades.

[Liv]

The TSA agent stared at my ID for a full 30 seconds before waving me through.

I'd feel safer driving, but Clive's anxious to get back to his pregnant wife.

And of course, Ravi has to get back.

He has the formula for the cure.

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to stare.

It's just I feel like I know you.

- I get that a lot.

- Oh.

No, I'm sure I've seen your face before.

- Are you on TV?

- Nope.

No?

Huh.

[Chuckles]

Sorry.

You sure?

[opening theme music playing]

It should not surprise any of us.

That Dolly Durkins, the leader of the "non-violent" concerned humans imposing common sense, is calling the sh*ts for the Dead Enders.

Murphy, anything we should know about your mother?

Keeps a Kn*fe in her boot.

She'll go down fighting.

We have lost 30 soldiers in 72 hours.

With each, her followers post a tweet.

Nevertheless, I want her taken alive if possible.

Sir, they're setting us on fire.

This is why the time of patty-cake is over.

Dismissed.

[cell phone vibrating]

[indistinct conversations]

Lieutenant Collins, have you seen a ghost?

Lillywhite just called.

He wants to turn himself in.

He's seeing the same tweets we're seeing.

He wants to fight.

Well, then, invite him in.

He'll be safe?

We need fighters, when motivated, Lillywhite is certainly that.

Key to the process, stay awake all night.

Zolpidem at take-off, power sleep, wake up fresh in Portland and nail this pitch.

[Clears throat]

God, I love modern medicine.

Ear buds?

Don't mind if I do.

[cell phone chimes]

- [flight attendant]

Earbuds?

- [woman]

Please.

No thanks.

Oh, but could I get a Mimosa?

Of course.

Jefferson High.

Nope.

I'm pretty sure you're thinking of someone else.

[sighs]

[mouthing]

It's just I'm usually so good with faces.

There was a commercial that ran non-stop for a while.

My friend said I looked just like the mom in it.

Pirate Pat's Seafood Snacks?

[imitates pirate]

"All right, ye little landlubbers.

" Oh, don't tell Dad that Mom left the galley empty.

"Remember, fed men tell no tales!

" [chuckling]

No, that's not it.

[cell phone chimes]

- [shouts]

What?

- [man shudders]

[man sighs]

My wife just went into labor.

Oh, congrats, man.

[Ravi mouthing]

I am so sorry.

[cell phone chimes]

Your Mimosa is too tempting.

I'm getting myself one.

You want a refill?

Sure.

Excuse me.

Can I please have two Mimosas?

- That kind of flight, huh?

- [chuckles]

[Liv clears throat]

Oh, could I have some more nuts as well?

Sure thing.

[gasps]

Would you look at that?

Water spots.

[mouthing]

[mouthing]

There you go.

Good as new.

Thank you.

Oh, one of those for me?

But, they're both Mimosas, right?

You should get the fuller one.

[indistinct chatter]

[Joyce]

Commander Ah, Major.

I was afraid you would be out there somewhere working against us.

It's us or them now.

I see that.

- Put me to work, Commander.

- Excellent.

Lock him in the holding cells.

Once he goes Romero, give him the formula.

You will find being of service much easier when you no longer have a choice.

I was promised I would get to fight.

Oh, you will fight.

And you will be a very dangerous monster indeed.

Ames, you're with me.

This is for you.

What am I supposed to do with it?

Call us on it once you put this on?

Blaine has requested the pleasure of your company.

Best I can tell, he's got some Beauty and the Beast fetish.

You kids know the words to "Be my guest"?

[Don E laughing]

You can tell Blaine, he can go to hell.

That's one way you could play it or If you wanna survive, put on the dress, play make-believe with the beast.

Peyton [breathes shakily]

She's not due for two more weeks.

I mean, this can't be happening.

We land in 30 minutes.

We can be in Seattle in six hours if everything breaks our way.

Labor is usually an eight to 12 hour process.

We'll get there.

[sighs]

[Ravi]

At least your seat-mate's conked out.

[Liv]

Thank God for small miracles.

[Ravi]

So, assuming we get back in time, and Major gets the Max Rager, what then?

[Liv]

We let the city know that a cheap and plentiful cure exists.

[Ravi]

How?

[Liv]

We'll think of something.

[Joyce]

Frisk him, Ames.

[zombies growling]

[Ames]

Spread 'em, Commander.

[Major]

What happened to your face, Ames?

[Ames grunts]

Since you asked, one of those humans you care so much about opened up on me with a freaking flamethrower.

So that's when I Take of your shirt!

Is this really necessary?

I'm a modest man.

Take it off.

Well, look here.

Enzo's gonna k*ll you.

- And I'm gonna enjoy - [g*nsh*t]

You got ten minutes to be in a weapons crate.

Spud and Diaz are guarding the Max Rager.

Break out when you feel yourself on the road.

Good luck.

Go make that cure.

SPUD: The Commander says sh**t on sight, anything that moves.

Kids, too.

Dead Enders have been running up, throwing grenades in our Humvees.

Mow 'em down.

[man whistling]

Who's that?

Looks like Ames.

[Diaz]

Ames.

A reminder.

We ask you to remain in your seats until the pilot has turned off the seat belt sign.

We have a few passengers who have quick connections, and ask for your patience as we get them off the plane first.

[indistinct radio chatter]

Ma'am, can you come with me?

Do you know who she is?

Let's not start a scene, ma'am.

Sir, you too.

Please come with me.

Yeah.

I'm not sure what's goin' on here, - but I need to be - Sir, we're here to help you get back to Seattle.

This is my brother, Michael.

We have a kid sister in Seattle.

You got her there.

You saved her life.

[sighs in relief]

I'll escort you to the Washington border.

Hope that'll help.

- Oh!

- [Michael chuckles]

Yeah?

[Ravi]

Yeah.

[Don E]

Her attitude.

You mean, did she jump in for joy, so delighted by the dress she couldn't wait to be romanced by her kidnapper?

- Generally, she seemed - Massively offended, frightened, appalled.

Frightened I can work with.

[Bubba]

Boss.

- Got your chlorine pellets.

- [Blaine exhales]

- Chlorine pellets?

- Yeah, for the well.

It smells like someone threw a carcass in there.

- You didn't - No!

All right.

"Scatter in the well every four hours until the smell dissipates.

" - Get on it.

- Ten-four.

[Peyton over radio]

Blaine, can you come down here?

Never underestimate fright.

It's a solid motivator.

[girl crying]

It's Becca.

She's dead.

[sighs]

Freylich kids.

What're you gonna do?

You can't have her.

Which one are you tallkin' about?

- 'Cause, either way, I'm gonna - [Peyton grunts]

Run, run.

Go, run!

Oliver.

[grunts]

[panting]

- Peyton!

- [g*nsh*t]

[groans]

Go!

[Grunts]

[screams]

No!

[tires screeching]

Lieutenant Collins.

Jessup reports finding Ames dead.

And your old friend, Major Lillywhite has escaped.

Perhaps you would like to take this chance to beg for your life?

Perhaps you'd like this chance to kiss my [thuds]

[Ravi exhales]

Where is everyone?

- Peyton!

- Kids, we're back.

- Where are they?

- I can't wait, I've gotta go.

Clive, it's a couple of miles.

Let me help.

Liv, I've I've gotta go.

Full cereal bowls left on the table.

[sniffs]

The milk's gone bad.

It looks like they left in a hurry.

Ravi, if anything happened to them Liv, look.

Liv.

- [chuckles]

- Oh, my goodness.

You okay?

You scared me.

Of course, I'm back.

I missed you.

[stammers]

I'm sorry, where Where's Peyton?

Is she with the Freylich kids?

They didn't wanna come back here.

They didn't think it was safe.

Why'd you even leave here?

This is the safe house.

We were kidnapped.

That guy, Blaine, and his bald friend.

Please.

Where is Peyton?

They took us to Blaine's dad's mansion.

Will someone please They sh*t her.

Is she still alive?

She wasn't moving.

Let's go.

I'm gonna k*ll everyone over there.

- You're welcome to help me.

- You can't.

You can't talk me out of this, Liv!

I will go find Blaine and Don E.

And I promise you, Ravi, they'll get no mercy from me.

You need to meet Major at the morgue.

Everyone in Seattle is counting on you, is counting on this cure.

[Pippi]

Liv, what's going to happen to us?

I mean, if the cure works?

Well, you'll all get cured.

But, not Oliver.

He's terminal.

If he gets the cure, then What happens to him?

Where do all the zombies like him go?

All the people whose lives you've saved?

What happens to our family?

Baby!

- We're having a baby!

Where - Third floor.

[doctor]

You need to push, Dale.

He said he'd be here.

[breathing heavily]

Bozzio-Babineaux?

Bozzio-Babineaux?

Bozzio-Babineaux?

Right this way, sir.

Oh, thank you.

[panting]

It is imperative you push.

The time is now.

[Clive yelling indistinctly outside]

[breathing heavily]

Now I push.

Hey, babe.

How you doin'?

I've been better.

[grunts]

Don't know about you, but I'm ready to meet our kid.

God, I love you.

- I love you too.

- Okay.

Push.

[grunting]

Push!

[both screaming]

[Major]

Ravi.

Where's Liv?

She's on her way to Blaine's.

- [Ravi sniffles]

- Why Blaine's?

[sniffles]

They They k*lled Peyton.

Blaine and Don E, they, uh They kidnapped the Freylich kids and the orphans.

[Sniffles]

Peyton rescued them.

[sniffles]

Get away.

I pray that's full of Max Rager.

It is.

Okay.

[Sniffles]

It's, uh It'll take sometime before there's enough for public distribution.

How long to make just one?

What?

[Blaine]

Mmm, mmm, mmm.

I must say, Bubba tastes much better than he looked.

What do you think?

This being your first brain meal and all.

Oh, the brain's palatable.

You on the other hand I know what'll fix that.

- [clears throat]

- [ringing]

Don E, more wine.

Bring the good stuff.

[in raspy voice]

Yes, master.

An aught-14 Zin, if it pleases.

Oh, my God, a Zin?

Don E, you're out of your element.

[watch beeping]

[in normal voice]

It's Bubba's watch.

Cool, right?

Time to go shock the well again.

[exhales]

I'll handle it.

Keep and eye on the ol' ball-and-chain till I get back.

[sighs]

Don't look at me with that tone of voice.

[gasps]

[exhales]

Your first vision!

You see anything good?

Blaine smothering a girl with a pillow.

Well, we all have our hobbies.

She was wearing a wedding dress.

She was calling out for you.

[Blaine]

You know you weren't wrong, Pop.

You started to believe in big ideas.

More than wealth, more than pleasure.

It's a short ride, life You gotta get what you can, while you can.

Someone's gonna come up on you, put a g*n to your head, and pull the trigger.

Some army's gonna line you up, and g*n you down.

It's okay by me.

[shouts]

You hear that?

It's okay by me.

'Cause I filled my life with wine, women, song.

At least I wasn't bored.

I'd rather be dead than [Blaine screaming]

[shouts]

You were saying?

[splashes]

[Don E]

She was the love of my life!

You lazy, cruel, preening fop!

[exhales]

No one was ever gonna love you!

Not Peyton!

Not your dad!

Hell, I am I am the only person who could stand you.

And you k*lled my fiancee!

- [Liv]

Don E!

- What?

- Wrong day, wrong time, Liv.

- [cocks g*n]

- [g*nsh*t]

- [gasps]

[screaming]

[splashes]

Enjoy eternity together.

[sobbing]

[continues sobbing]

[Peyton]

How funny would it be if now I knocked you in?

Sorry, I would've come sooner but You need me to take a cure for zombie-ism on live TV?

This cure.

Why me?

You may be Seattle's most well-known zombie.

I'm not even Seattle's most well-known zombie in a six-foot radius.

This one can't take it.

But people mostly hate him.

And they'll think he has a political agenda.

Look, even if I take that cure, and it doesn't k*ll me horribly on camera, and it works, and it turns me human again, half my viewers still wouldn't believe it.

You know how it is these days.

Fake news.

We'll do a blood pressure test.

Live.

- Fakable.

- A ghost pepper.

You'll eat one pre-cured, down the hatch, no issues, then post cure, you'll eat one Fakable.

Oh, finally!

We're not camels.

We'll cut you open.

You'll bleed like only humans bleed.

We're talking about the fate of mankind.

[stage manager]

Stand down, Johnny.

Dear leader's stealing your time slot.

He's got some big announcement.

He's on his way in.

[Johnny]

Oh, sh**t.

Looks like we won't be cutting open old Johnny on live TV today, boys.

[whispers]

What are we gonna do now?

I have no idea.

[Major]

I always loved you.

And I always will.

Take care of yourself.

Bye.

I'll say it again, Major.

This is a terrible idea.

You got a better one?

Well, none that you'd approve.

Give it to me.

Good evening, I am Johnny Frost, and this is your 6:00 p.

m news.

Our top story According to the Chief Medical Examiner of the Seattle Police Department, an inexpensive cure for the zombie virus has been perfected.

Get him off!

[Johnny]

And will be made available within the next few weeks for those infected with the virus.

Mass production of the cure - Did he just say - will begin within the week.

They did it.

There has been no official statement from the U.

S.

government - All right, hey!

- [static beep]

What's happening?

Whatever it is, it's not good.

Bravo, mon ami.

You will be our first guest at the guillotine.

If you could schedule that before I write my next alimony check [g*n f*ring in distance]

Commander, Dead Enders just rolled up.

- Twenty, maybe 30.

- That is all?

You two, head out with Murphy.

You are zombies.

Take the fight to them.

Hmm?

Be the aggressor!

Yes, sir.

Not till we see the red of their eyes.

Got it?

Yeah.

Tell me when.

Okay.

Here we go.

On my mark.

Three, two, one Go, go, go!

[Enzo]

We do not wish for v*olence.

But we are fighting for the survival of our species.

We will take every necessary means to ensure our survival.

Today, I am offering safe passage out of Seattle to any human who provides information leading to the capture of Mr.

Lillywhite.

How about I make it easier for you, Enzo?

Well, look The man who got us into this mess.

Why don't you want people knowing there's a viable cure?

There is no such thing.

Sure, there is.

I've got one right here.

Tell you what.

I'll take it right now, and you can sh**t me as many times as you want.

Just not in the head.

If I'm still a zombie, I'll survive, and you can guillotine me in the public square, like you want.

But, if I die Well, that means there's a cure.

It proves nothing.

Stay with me here.

Those cures sold for millions of dollars.

What motivation would I have to spend millions of dollars then take a cure and ask to be m*rder*d on live TV?

Well, it, uh [exhales]

I'm here to prove the people that it's over.

To ask them to put down their weapons.

In a matter of weeks, the zombie virus can be a historical footnote, like smallpox and malaria.

Watch.

[g*n cocks]

[all exclaiming]


Are we still rolling?

[director]

Yes, we're still live.

We are still live.

Get up, zombie.

Get up!

He is alive.

[screams]

[grunting]

[laughing]

What is so funny?

Don't you know you're about to die?

[sighing]

Because the head of Fillmore-Graves isn't a zombie anymore.

Where's your red eyes and your super strength?

Shouldn't I be dead by now?

[laughs]

[g*nsh*t]

That's for Stephen.

[people screaming]

[g*n f*ring continues]

Where's our flamethrower?

[Benny]

Don't know.

There it is.

Cover me.

You know how to use this thing?

[g*n f*ring continues in distance]

Mom help me.

We're gonna k*ll them all, Benny.

I swear to God.

Every last one of them.

Ravi, why aren't you picking up?

Why isn't Major picking up?

I'm at the morgue.

Peyton went to see if she could find you at your house.

[cell phone ringing]

Clive!

Did you make it in time?

How are you?

How's Dale?

How's the baby?

Liv, we're all fine.

We're all good.

Um Have you been watching TV?

What's wrong, Clive?

Uh, I've been calling, um My battery was dead.

Just Clive, tell me what's going on?

So, um [Major]

Hey, Liv.

It's me.

I'm about to do something stupid.

But, if it works Big "if" It'll save lives.

But basically, the way I make all my decisions these days is by asking myself, "What would Liv Moore do?

" [Ravi panting]

Major?

Major?

You tricky son of a bitch.

What was in the syringe you gave me?

Max Rager.

That's all I had on hand.

You just had to be the hero, didn't you?

Next time, though Next time, it's all yours.

You're not taking a selfie, are you?

[Major chuckles]

- Oh.

- Hey, careful there.

[Major]

Whatever happens, know this.

It's always been you.

I always loved you.

And I always will.

[sobbing]

Take care of yourself.

Bye.

Liv?

I was watching the news and I haven't seen Clive in days.

I thought he might be Hey, are you all right?

- [door opens]

- Hello?

Sir, I don't think you're supposed to be in [shrieks]

Is the captain in?

Which one?

Whichever one wants to sign off on my overtime.

[knocking at door]

[people laughing]

[knocks]

- [both laughing]

- Sorry, Captain.

Captain, bad time?

To squeeze more money out of my overtime budget?

Never.

- I'll take care of this.

- Yeah, all right.

[clears throat]

Hey, have fun on your virtual cast.

Don't say anything I wouldn't say.

Kind of a low bar, isn't it?

[softly]

Oh.

[door closes]

So, we're really doin' this, huh?

We should.

Every little bit helps.

It's been too long, my friend.

Speaking of, how are the kids?

Amazing.

I'll show you.

Whoa, Olivia.

She's getting so big.

My word.

Jacob's gotta be a foot taller.

You won't believe this, some second cousin of Michelle's tracked us down a couple of months ago.

Tried to claim custody of Jacob.

No.

Yeah, guy's just looking for a payout.

We're getting a lawyer.

Ask and ye shall receive.

Clive.

And what are you receiving?

Free legal advice.

Oh, yeah.

I'm happy to help.

Oh, we should be fine, but thank you, Peyton.

How are things with you?

Same as ever.

Job's great, - Ravi's Ravi.

- [Ravi]

Hmm?

Which is to say great.

Yeah.

Oh!

Okay.

g*ng's all here.

Hey, thanks y'all so much for doing this.

Uh, so as we discussed, I'll just do a brief intro and then we'll just get right into it.

Let's dive in.

Excellent.

[female announcer]

From spacious skies to fruited planes, immerse yourself in America The Virtual, with your host Byron DeCece.

Welcome everyone to a very special edition of America The Virtual.

I'm your host, Byron DeCece.

Today marks the tenth anniversary of the infamous Battle for Seattle.

A brief but deadly civil w*r inside the walled city of yore.

A battle that ended when an affordable cure for zombie-ism was discovered and revealed to the world.

Joining me today, to give their account are three people who were in the thick of it all.

Clive Babineaux, former Seattle PD, homicide detective.

Peyton Charles, one time acting mayor of the Emerald City.

And of course, Dr.

Cure Good himself.

Ravi Chakrabarti.

Please don't call him that.

It's, uh, reserved for the boudoir.

Oh, okay.

A sexier start than I expected.

Now, before we jump back a decade, let's bring everybody up to speed on your lives now.

Clive, you're still protecting and serving?

That's right.

San Francisco PD, alongside my wife Dale.

Amazing.

Peyton, you're a District Attorney in Atlanta?

I am.

Ravi, you've made a tidy sum from book deals and speaking appearances, yet you still punch the clock everyday as the head of the CDC.

I'd feel selfish sitting at home when I can still make a contribution.

He feeds off the adulation of young researchers.

What?

Don't forget the allure of raw, unbridled power.

- Oh.

- I quite like that, too.

Uh, let's travel back in time.

Ten years ago, Seattle was on the brink.

Right?

You had zombies and humans murdering each other in the streets until you administered the cure to the head zombie, the former commander of Fillmore-Graves on live TV.

Well, once people knew there was a cure, there was no reason to fight.

And yet, not all zombies opted for the cure.

Since zombies no longer pose an apocalyptic thr*at, brain donations resumed.

Sick and dying people from across the country migrated in droves.

Seattle was repopulated, rebuilt, and rebranded.

They say it's very nice.

Yet, none of you elected to stay.

[Ravi clears throat]

No.

After everything that went down, I guess, we all just needed a clean slate.

[Byron]

I can imagine.

Let's talk about Liv Moore.

AKA Renegade.

She was the face of the peaceful co-existence cause until she was tragically k*lled by an anti-zombie zealot in a su1c1de bombing.

Unless, of course, you believe the rumor that she survived.

No, we don't.

The entire police station collapsed into the morgue.

We dug through the rubble for weeks, but Even if she somehow lived through the blast, she'd of turned into a rabid zombie buried for that long.

We eventually had to admit to ourselves that all hope was lost.

Well, we all did.

Major didn't.

He kept digging along with the group of orphans Liv had taken in.

Major would've cleared out every last beam, every chunk of concrete.

[Ravi]

But there were still Dead Enders who wouldn't Still haven't given up the fight.

Right, right, Dolly Durkins, the fishmonger, you think she's still alive?

'Cause some people think that she's just a legend, a name that's used to scare zombie children.

She's still out there.

The Dead Enders had a deck of cards.

Fifty-two zombies they wanted eliminated.

Only 12 of those zombies survive today.

[Byron]

Your friend, Major Lillywhite, the, uh The "good" commander of Fillmore Graves.

I believe that's how the history books will remember him.

He hasn't been seen in a decade either.

That's right.

Well, some say he went underground, some say that the Dead Enders finally caught up with him Your guess is as good as ours.

You know there've been Liv sightings everywhere.

From Tijuana to Bangor, Maine.

Well, I mean, was Elvis with her?

[Peyton]

That's what happens when you're a legend.

People wanna believe she was capable of the impossible.

We all wish the rumors were true.

More than anything.

But they're not.

Liv's gone.

If Liv had survived, we would've heard from her by now.

[Liv]

Are you okay?

[Byron]

Okay.

Let's just say that you could imagine that Major and Liv, by some miracle, managed to still be alive.

What would you wanna say to them?

[Peyton]

We'd tell them we love them.

[Ravi]

That we miss them.

[Clive]

That if they're still kicking, they sure as hell better look us up.

[sighs]

You guys, thank you so much.

This was great.

I'm sorry for running a little over the hour, and sorry for pushing so hard about all the "Are Major and Liv still alive?

" stuff.

It's what the people wanna know.

- We're used to it.

- [Byron]

I bet.

Take care.

Damn.

Ten years.

[man]

And I haven't aged a day.

Neither do your jokes.

'Cause you say that every time.

'Cause they're gold, baby!

How's the family?

Wonderful.

How's the virtual cast?

We gave them the same old song and dance.

Think our acting's gotten really good these last few years.

- You were great.

- Thank you.

But I was solid.

You were chewing scenery, again.

Sounds right.

Uh, it's called making a choice and committing.

Hey, buddy.

Missed you, too.

[gasps]

It's remarkable.

You really are preserved in amber.

They both are.

It's not fair.

I still look good.

I ain't mad atcha.

But I do miss you, partner.

Aww.

Vice versa, Clive.

If only there was some way we could see more of each other.

Like, every day for instance.

Hmm.

We know this beautiful slice of heaven called Zombie Island.

Spectacular ocean views, great for families.

- Affordable.

- And if you act now, we can throw an abrupt halt to the aging process.

All it takes is a scratch.

Okay.

[chuckles]
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