04x11 - Chapter Sixty-Eight: Quiz Show

[bunniefuu]

[JUGHEAD]

Winter had come to Riverdale, and everyone was suffering from an acute case of Quiz Show fever.

No one more so than Betty Cooper, who was pouring her considerable energies into b*ating the tar out of Stonewall Prep's team led by, wouldn't you know it, Bret Weston Wallis.

The only person immune to Quiz Show fever?

My pal Archie Andrews who was feeling a lot less lonely these days.

Hey, Archie.

You okay?

Yeah.

- Yeah, I'm great, Uncle Frank.

- Not me.

First day as foreman Man, I'm more nervous than when I started basic training.

No, you're gonna do awesome.

In fact, I got something for you.

It's Fred's tool belt.

Yeah, I can't take another man's gear.

Especially not my brother's.

Well, you're not talking it, you're borrowing it.

He'd want you to.

So do I.

Thanks, Archie for everything.

[BETTY SIGHS]

[SIGHS]

Thank God for Bret's morning workouts Jug, do not mention him right now, okay, and ruin this moment.

I just love getting you all wound up.

[BETTY SIGHS]

- Why are you smiling?

- Just everything.

You're here, I turned in my draft for the Baxter Brothers book.

And Yale said Yale said what?

[JUGHEAD SIGHS]

Did you get accepted into Yale and not tell me?

Yeah, I think I did.

Wow.

- Are you okay?

- Yeah, no, I'm just I'm just processing.

But I'm happy for you, Jug.

I'm happy for you, I'm proud of you.

- Really?

- Yes.

Yes.

Let me show you how much.

[SCOFFS]

You two are finally done.

I thought I'd be late for class.

Oh, I guess I'll see you in New Haven next year.

Of course, you'll just be a visitor.

- You got into Yale?

- Yeah.

Don't look so surprised.

And don't worry, Betty, I will try to keep the co-eds away from Forsythe.

No promises.

But I do promise to crush you in Quiz Show finals, if Riverdale makes it that far.

Dr.

Beaker, as our chemistry teacher, we are hoping you have the skill set to help us with something of a personal nature.

Are you a rum drinker, Dr.

Beaker?

[CHUCKLES]

Uh, not during school hours and never with students.

Ugh, calm down, Dr.

Egghead.

[EXHALES]

We're simply asking you to analyze our maple-based concoction to ensure that our recipe is different enough from Lodge Rum.

That way, we can't be sued or ceased-and-desisted by my father.

So I ask you again, Dr.

Beaker, are you a rum drinker?

The board that the runs the Baxter Brothers has taken a look at the first draft of your book, and they have a few thoughts.

Well, one more global thought.

They would like a new mystery.

New mystery?

Like the whole book?

They think the boy in the river storyline is a bit soft.

They're looking for something darker.

They mentioned something about say, um serial K*llers being a potential fertile ground to explore.

Okay, um, I'll just have to think about it.

Well, think fast, and have some pitches prepared.

The Brotherhood is coming here to meet with you.

[JUGHEAD]

So, I need some serial k*ller advice.

My publishers want a dark and edgy villain for the book, Charles.

So now I have to come up with pitches in the vein of Zodiac or Hannibal Lecter.

I figured you would have some ideas.

Yeah, sure, no problem.

But don't you have firsthand experience with an infamous local serial k*ller?

You mean the Black Hood?

No, I couldn't do that to Betty.

Hmm, fair enough.

Well, I've got boxes full of K*llers, so I'll pick out my ten most gruesome ones for you.

Thank you, Chuck.

I owe you.

[FRANK]

I know you all worked hard for my brother.

Rest assured, as the new foreman, I plan on busting my ass, the same as you do.

And I specifically want to thank Tom Keller for filling in during these difficult times.

Cool, guys, let's get to work.

- [WORKERS APPLAUD]

- [WORKER]

Okay, guys, let's go.

You know, Archie, I would've appreciated a heads-up that I was being replaced.

I know, Mr.

Keller, I'm sorry.

It happened fast, but Frank has a ton of experience.

I think the crew's gonna love him.

I gotta be honest with you, Arch, I don't know about your uncle.

He's been trouble since the day he was born.

I must've arrested him a half dozen times when I was sheriff.

Oh, that was then.

My dad believed in second chances, Mr.

Keller.

So do I.

[QUIZ SHOW THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

Welcome back to the Regional RIVW Quiz Show's Semi-finals.

Seaside High trails Riverdale 210 to 240, and now for the final round.

Which Venetian island has been famous for glassmaking since the 13th century?

- [BUZZING IN]

- Murano.

- [HOST]

Correct.

- Never go in August.

So many mosquitoes.

What is the length of the diagonal if the side of the square is 10?

- [BUZZING IN]

- 10 square root of 2.

- [HOST]

Correct.

- My brilliant little savant.

Which of the following is the powerhouse of the cell.

- [BUZZING IN]

- Mitochondria.

[HOST]

Correct.

Which Americans architect's house - in southwest Pennsylvania - [BUZZING IN]

- Frank Lloyd Wright.

- [HOST]

Correct.

Who also designed Thornhill.

I knew that.

- [TIMER CHIMING]

- Well, time's up.

Riverdale has won.

They will go on to face Stonewall Prep in the finals.

Hey, Betty.

You did great out there.

Great might not be good enough to b*at him.

Ah, that's Bret, huh?

Bret Weston Wallis clearly came here to throw me off my game.

Is there any way you could help me with him?

As long as it doesn't involve shallow graves and lye.

No, I just wanna make him sweat.

He's a son of a diplomat, brags about being untouchable.

But what skeletons are buried in his closet?

Any intel you could find that would help me mess with his mind would be much appreciated.

Is it because he got into Yale and you didn't?

- [SIGHS]

- Alice told me.

Charles, I worked my ass off for four years, I put an extra time at the Blue and Gold, I maintained a 4.

1 GPA, and I still didn't get in.

Not knowing why is driving me crazy.

My former mentor at the FBI, he teaches criminal law at Yale.

I'll see if I can get you some answers.

About Yale [INHALES]

and Bret.

Thank you.

[JUGHEAD]

And so, anyway, the Baxter Brothers are trying to catch this serial k*ller named the Fish Monger, [SIGHS]

who gets his name because he guts his victims The idea of a serial k*ller is intriguing, but what we've heard so far feels a bit forced.

Okay What about a serial k*ller that uses social media in order to stalk his prey?

Forsythe's best work stems from his personal experiences.

Might I suggest you start there?

What about a dark and ominous force that threatens the town of Seaport?

Uh, an obsessed k*ller who is looking to expose the hypocrisy and sins of his neighbors.

The Baxter Brothers discover that the man unleashing his righteous rage is the father of Bobby Baxter's girlfriend, Tracy True.

This sound promising.

What's the name of the k*ller?

Uh, the Brown Hood.

If you give me a little more time, I can come up with another No, we like this.

You ask me, this sounds like a million dollar idea.

[GRUNTS]

- Hey.

- Hey.

I just drove by the site.

Where are the guys?

Oh, Frank called it a day and decided to invite everybody back to your place for beers and tall tales.

Oh, you didn't wanna go?

Somebody's gotta balance the books here, Archie, they're bit of a mess.

How so?

Well, for starters, nobody received their Christmas bonuses.

- Your dad never missed a year.

- We'll bounce back, Mr.

Keller, we just need more time.

[FRANK LAUGHS]

You gotta remember at this point Fred is three sheets to the wind, okay?

And he's somehow convinced himself that stealing Seaside's mascot would give Riverdale the edge in the playoff game, okay?

[DOOR CLOSES]

So, he climbs over this big fence, right, and he goes to grab Peter the Pig out of his pen, and get this, he can't climb back out.

- [ALL LAUGHING]

- He is absolutely trapped.

So, the next morning, security shows up, and there's Fred, all curled up in the mud, holding on to this squealing hog, and without missing a b*at, my brother says, "I got the bacon.

You got the eggs?" [ALL LAUGHING]

Your old man sure knew how to pick a crew.

Reminds me of the guys I served with.

Mr.

Keller said some of the guys were upset they didn't get their bonuses this year.

Hmm, you're so much like your dad.

Always worried about other people.

Relax, we got this.

For you.

Mija, how very generous.

But do I need to remind you that I actually own the patent on this rum?

Correction, Daddy.

You own the patent on sad, tired molasses-based rum.

Ours is maple-based.

And, in a pre-emptive move to rum-block you, we had a scientist analyze it.

According to him, by making the main ingredient maple syrup, our rum's DNA has changed by 51%.

[VERONICA]

Which means, legally, you can't sue or stop us.

And, should you be inspired to create your own version of our invention, consider yourself forewarned, because we control the patent on maple rum.

So, toodles.

In other words, Daddy, our rum w*r is back on.

[CHARLES]

Your instincts were right again, Betty.

As requested, I did some digging on Bret.

[BETTY]

And what did you find?

[GASPS]

- Betty, what's up?

- I'm so onto you, Bret.

God, you just think you're so untouchable, and that everyone is beneath you, but the truth is, you are a filthy cheater.

Whoa, Betty, hang on for a minute, what's going on?

Your roommate's father paid someone to take the PSATs for him.

Oh, but don't worry, his father covered it all up, and then bought his way into Stonewall, as I'm sure he did with Yale, as well.

Because the truth is, you haven't earned a single thing in your life, Bret.

You're just a pathetic rich kid.

Why're you making me out to be the villain here?

It's not like I'm the one writing a YA fiction based off the exploits of your deranged father.

Is that what your novel is about?

Betty, wait.

Betty?

[VERONICA]

Cheryl, I've been musing.

We now have a truly enviable product.

But we still need to get the word out to potential customers.

So, what if we make La Bonne Nuit our base of operations?

Query.

Didn't your daddykins revoke this place's liquor licence?

We wouldn't sell rum.

We would hand out free samples.

And, instead of being a speakeasy, we'd reopen La Bonne Nuit as a dance club.

Interesting.

Sweaty people equals thirsty people, equals people desperate for overpriced mocktails.

Meanwhile, we covertly hand out samples of our delicious homemade rum.

Our coat check girl could take down the names and orders of potential customers, and the legitimate money we bring in at the club could help fund our shadow operation.

- [DOOR BELLS JINGLE]

- [MUSIC PLAYING]

[FOGARTY]

Kevin.

[KEVIN SIGHS]

Now's not a good time, Fangs.

I'm waiting for my Grind'em date.

[CHUCKLES]

I'm not stalking you.

I'm just picking up a couple of burgers.

But I want to apologize for what I did to you.

- I was under Edgar's control.

- Fangs, I get it.

I was brainwashed by Edgar, too.

But that doesn't mean we should get back together.

Can we just go on a date and see what happens?

[DOOR BELL JINGLES]

Sorry, my date just got here.

- Hi, are you Terry?

I'm Kevin.

- Nice to meet you.

Listen, do you want to get out of here?

I have a room at the Five Seasons.

- Unless that's too forward?

- No, not at all.

[SIGHS]

[BETTY]

Tell me Bret is lying.

Tell me that you didn't exploit my family tragedy for a Baxter Brothers novel.

Betty, it was a Hail Mary.

I had to give the Baxter Brotherhood something.

I was never going to go through with it without asking you first.

And I didn't ask you because I wasn't even going to do it.

If you wanna use my life, you wanna write about the Black Hood, have the guts to ask me.

- Don't lie to my face.

- I wasn't lying.

No, you were just omitting the truth, which is exactly what you did about the Quill and Skull, and about getting accepted into Yale.

I told you about Yale, I just had to figure out the best time to do so.

Oh, and the best time to do so was right after we had sex?

[STAMMERS]

There isn't a handbook on how to tell your girlfriend that you got accepted to her dream school.

Yeah, especially not when the only reason you got accepted to Yale is because of this stupid school.

[EXHALES SHARPLY]

Oh, is that what you think?

That I don't deserve to go to Yale?

[SIGHS]

Thanks.

Good news, fellas.

I just got off the phone with the mayor's office, and we've been hired to repair the drainage system in the prison.

Government job, real money.

We can't do that, Mr.

Keller.

We can't do business with Hiram Lodge.

That prison represents everything wrong and corrupt about this town.

We'd be taking blood money from Hiram.

My dad wouldn't do it.

I won't either.

Archie, we can't just do business with the people we like.

Kid made his decision, Tom.

Yeah, well, I think he's made the wrong decision.

I don't know if he should be getting advice from you about it.

Yeah, well, I'm family, so I got more to say in this than you do.

Look, I've made up my mind, we'll figure out another way.

And please, don't tell any of the other crew about this.

The morale's low enough as it is.

Let's keep it between us.

Okay.

Hey, Betty.

Do you have a minute?

I just heard from my mentor at Yale.

[SIGHS]

Yeah.

What was it?

My grades?

My essay?

What?

Just rip the band-aid off, Charles.

It wasn't any of that.

It was that they didn't want to accept the daughter of the Black Hood.

They were afraid that if your father's identity got out, it would generate bad press, problems with other students.

I'm sorry.

What the hell is wrong with you, Bret?

Why would you go and tell Betty that?

How did you even know?

DuPont mentioned something.

I thought you were supposed to be watching my back, - not stabbing it.

- Wait, look, I didn't do this to hurt you, Jones.

I did it to get under Betty's skin before the Quiz Show finals.

So you threw a live grenade into my relationship, so you could win a trivia contest?

Of course.

This is what it means to be a Quill and Skull.

To win at any cost, always.

You'll never be satisfied, will you, Dad?

It wasn't enough that you had to ruin my past and my present, but you had to destroy my future too.

Even rotting in the ground, you still find ways to t*rture me.

[SIGHS]

Not anymore.

[SNIFFLES]

I'm done.

I hate you!

Betty.

Betty!

Betty.

Honey.

It's okay, honey.

It's okay.

- It's okay.

- [CRYING]

I'm so sorry, honey.

It's okay.

Charles told me everything.

I'm sorry.

[FRANK]

There he is, Big Red.

Come join us.

One second, Uncle Frank, I'm just grabbing a soda.

Uh, where was I?

Oh, right.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

- [CARLOS]

Hey.

- Carlos, did you want a beer?

I'm good.

Um, listen, Archie, I heard we turned down a government contract.

- Is that true?

- Where did you hear that?

From my buddies working the gig.

Look, Carlos, that's not the kind of job we take.

Well, some of the guys are pretty pissed about it.

There's a lot of tension on the site.

Something doesn't change soon, your crew's gonna quit.

And some advice You should spend a little more time with your boots on the ground.

At the site, with us.

Okay?

[KEVIN CHUCKLING]

Okay, okay.

[EXHALES]

- What is with the tickling?

- [SIGHS]

Have you ever videotaped yourself?

- Once.

It didn't go well.

- No.

Videotaped yourself getting tickled?

Why does every date I go on have to get super weird?

It's just tickling.

No sex.

You don't even have to take off your shirt.

I direct you and another hot guy.

It's fun.

And it pays.

- How much?

- Five grand a video.

[CHUCKLES]

Um So it's with another guy, not you?

I just work the camera.

But I have someone who'd be really into you.

A total beefcake.

What do you say?

- Sure.

- Cool, I'll text my guy.

He's waiting down at the bar.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

You didn't have to come.

Yes, I did.

Especially after what your mom told me downstairs.

You okay?

I mean, I fully spiraled in a cemetery.

No, you had a human reaction to a situation that was totally out of your control.

I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you when you needed me.

I love you.

I really hate when we fight.

You deserve Yale, Jug.

And I'm so happy for you.

It's just hard for me to untangle that from how sad I am that I won't be going.

- [CHUCKLES]

- It's not fair.

But I've been thinking Stonewall got me into Yale, but what if I could pay it forward, helping you win?

- You mean the Quiz Show?

- No, you've got that in the bag.

I'm talking about the other, bigger game that we're playing.

[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]

Cheryl, we're a hit.

As is our maple concoction.

But did you expect anything less?

And we already have a long list of interested buyers.

Let's keep those free sh*ts flowing.

[MAN]

Sheriff's department.

What the hell is this?

Haven't you been through enough of them to know?

- It's a raid.

- For some trumped up reason, no doubt.

You may be mayor, but you can't just barge in here like you own the place.

Well, this warrant says otherwise.

It has been brought to my attention that there is alcohol being sold on the premises.

False, we aren't selling anything.

You don't think I know what game you girls are playing?

Ladies, I'm the grand master.

And when you play against me, you'll lose every single time.

[SNAPS FINGERS]

[PEOPLE GASPING]

[POP MUSIC PLAYING]

Are you sure he understands what kind of video we're making?

That it's just tickling?

Relax.

Daryl's one of my top earners, and subscribers love it when opposites pair up.

Trust me, I've done hundreds of these.

Did you say hundreds?

What kind of operation are you running?

Play your cards right, stud, and you'll find out.

[CRACKS KNUCKLES]

[POURS RUM]

Fear not, we have a new batch brewing at Thistlehouse even as we lick our wounds.

And to what end?

To become floor polish like that batch?

And I know my father, he'll just keep raiding this place until we cry tio.

[SIGHS]

Yes, he will raid this place.

Why're you saying it like it's a good thing?

Because I've just had one of my hellaciously simple, yet brilliant ideas.

What if we keep this location open as a nightclub as a distraction?

Get him to focus on La Bonne Nuit while we relocate our rum business elsewhere.

Do you happen to have one of these magical realms tucked away in your back pocket?

Back pocket?

More like top floor.

You're a natural, Kev.

You have a great laugh.

Terrific timber.

Great.

You can make a lot more if and when you build a following.

Terry, this is a one-time thing.

That's a shame.

You could make some serious bank.

All right, let me ask you.

Would I always have to work with Daryl?

Daryl's popular, but, no.

Why?

Did you have someone else in mind?

- [VERONICA]

Cheryl, what is this place?

- [DOOR OPENS]

Mumsie's old brothel.

The Maple Club.

The most exclusive gentlemen's club in town, just sitting here.

Okay, but is a former cathouse really on-brand for our female empowerment start-up?

Mommy Dreadful was certainly was no ally to the cause, but that doesn't mean we can't use this place for our own purposes.

[BLOWS]

Not only is its rent prepaid for the rest of the year, but it is and has everything we need.

Private drinking club, check.

Premium security system, check.

List of Riverdale's richest rubes Check.

Look at all the names in here.

Cheryl, do you realize what this is?

Clients with the financial means to pay at the price point we require.

Exactly.

So, let's tap those scumbags like maple trees and start making some real money.

As a valued long-term client, we wanted you to be the first to know that the Maple Club is reopening.

No, we are no longer a bordello.

Think of it more as a social club, offering exclusivity, discretion and high-end, maple-centric liquor, a brand so rare it can only be purchased on the premises.

[VERONICA]

Yes, I had a feeling that might be of interest to you.

Of course [BOTH]

You'll be put at the top of the list.

Between senior year and operating La Bonne Nuit as a cover, we're taking on quite the load.

What we need is a full-time live-in manager.

Someone who will be beholden to us.

Who will live, eat, and sleep here to ensure things run smoothly.

I have the perfect candidate.

[VERONICA]

You've got to be kidding me.

- Cheryl, she's a k*ller.

- So was Betty's father.

So was your father.

True.

Why have you come for me, nightmare child?

To offer you a change of venue, Mumsie.

And a way for you to work off your debt to society and to me.

As long as you're willing to play by our tightly coiled rules.

[SCOFFS]

[KELLER]

I knew it was gonna happen, I just didn't think it was gonna happen this quick.

What's the problem, Mr.

Keller?

There's 200 bucks missing from petty cash.

You know anything about that, Frank?

Yeah, I borrowed it against my salary.

You mean, you stole it.

You can't steel something when your family name's on the shingle, Tom.

Your brother put up that sign, Frank.

It had nothing to do with you.

Archie, I've done my best to help you, but if you're gonna stand beside a piece of garbage like this, we're finished.

- Uncle Frank.

- [KELLER GRUNTS]

Mr. Keller.

[BOTH GRUNTING]

That's it.

I'm done.

I quit.

Any of you who want to work a job where you actually get paid, you know where to find me.

Just gonna keep giving me the silent treatment?

I stuck my neck out for you, Frank.

How the hell could you steal from the till?

I didn't steal it.

I borrowed it against my future salary.

If you needed money, why didn't you just come to me?

Because you're my nephew.

I'm a 40-year-old man, Archie.

I did eight years in the m*llitary, seven of that in combat.

How the hell do you think it makes me feel to have to ask a teenager for a loan?

What did you even need it for?

I got a hot tip, a sure thing at the track.

[SCOFFS]

You're gambling with it?

I was trying to earn enough to pay the guys their bonuses.

But go ahead and think the worst, Archie, everybody else does.

[DOOR OPENS]

- [DOOR CLOSES]

- [SIGHS]

[WOMAN]

All right, we're on in five.

[MAN 1]

One-two, one-two.

[MAN 2]

Sound check, please.

[MAN 3]

Cam one, over here, please.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[JUGHEAD]

Betty.

This is Mr.

Brooks, the Yale recruiter I was telling you about.

Recruiter?

It's a pleasure to meet you, sir.

The pleasure is mine.

Forsythe was insistent I see you in action.

- He's your biggest cheerleader.

- And I'm his too.

- Okay, break a leg out there.

- Okay, thanks.

Nice to meet you.

- Betty.

- Hi.

- Jughead told me about the recruiter.

- Mmm-hmm.

If you win out there, you get another sh*t?

Yup, as if I wasn't already stressed enough.

Oh, honey, I'm sorry.

I'm just really excited for you.

I left you a present in the greenroom.

[SIGHS]

Oh, my God, Mom.

What did you do?

Well, hello, everyone, and welcome to RIVW's Quiz Show.

We have our returning champions, Stonewall Prep, facing first-time finalists Riverdale High.

So, let's get quizzing.

What country has the longest coastline in continental Europe?

- [BUZZING IN]

- Norway.

Correct.

- [BUZZING IN]

- The miracle of Dunkirk.

Correct.

- [BUZZING IN]

- Aft, bow, port, starboard.

Correct.

- [BUZZING IN]

- If the limit never approaches anything, - the limit does not exist.

- [HOST]

Correct.

In his 1899 novella The Jungle Book, - what author - Rudyard Kipling.

[HOST]

Correct.

- [BUZZING IN]

- Demand Demand side economics.

Why are we even here?

It's like she knows the answers before the question are even asked.

- [BUZZING IN]

- Burgundy, France.

Oh, sorry, that's incorrect.

- I'm sorry.

- It's okay.

[HOST]

To Stonewall.

- [BUZZING IN]

- Cotes du Rhone.

Oh, sorry, that's also incorrect.

It's Bordeaux, jackhole.

Actually, Bret, it's Alsace.

The correct answer is Alsace.

Well, with the thrilling back and forth, the score's still tied at 520.

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

Well, that sound can only mean one thing, it is time for our final question.

It's all your, B.

Destroy that pleated khaki trash monster.

For the win.

In a manual transmission vehicle, what mechanical device connects two or more rotating shafts?

[BOTH BUZZ IN]

Spark plug.

That is incorrect.

[SIGHS]

[HOST]

Riverdale, your chance to steal.

The clutch.

That is correct.

- [BELL CHIMING]

- [ALL CHEERING]

[HOST]

Riverdale has won.

Riverdale are the winners.

Oh, my God!

[HOST]

Well, there you have it, everyone.

Another fantastic Quiz Show.

Thanks for joining in.

[ALICE]

Say, "Victory.

" - [ALL]

Victory.

- [CAMERA CLICKS]

Okay, that's cute.

I'll take genius girlfriends for 200, Alex.

I don't know what's better, the win or the look on Bret's face.

Well, you're gonna to solve every mystery in Connecticut, and we're going to eat a lot of pizza.

[BETTY CHUCKLES]

[ALICE]

It looks perfect there.

And I'm so glad to see that you're not b*ating yourself up.

You did what you had to do.

Yeah, not in the way that you think, Mom.

I didn't use the answers that you stole.

I tore those up and threw them away.

I wanted to b*at Bret fair and square.

- I take it the bet came in?

- Yeah.

Turned $200 into ten grand.

It's enough to pay the bonuses.

We good now?

This is great, Uncle Frank.

But, no, we're not good.

When you took that money, it felt like you were stealing from my dad.

I was just trying to help, Archie.

It's not what you did.

It's how you did it.

Andrews Construction isn't just a business, it's my dad's legacy.

We treat it with honor, with respect.

This can't happen again.

You sound just like him.

And I understand.

[STUDENTS CHANTING]

Betty!

Betty!

[ALL CHEERING]

We did it, Mr. Honey.

We won.

You did, Ms. Cooper, and apparently how you did it is a grave problem.

I don't understand.

What do you This was found in the trash inside your greenroom.

My office, now!

[DOOR CLOSES]

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

[BAG THUDS]

The school called.

I tried convincing Mr. Honey that you had nothing to do with it.

That this was my doing to try to give you an advantage.

To balance the damage your father has done.

I know, Mom.

Why aren't you at work?

Apparently, somebody told my station manager, and I have been put on leave without pay for who knows how long.

I just don't understand, how could anyone find out?

I mean, where's the evidence?

I was so careful.

Exhibit A.

Someone must have dug through my trash, probably Bret.

But you didn't even use these answers.

Doesn't matter.

No one believes me.

I saw how hard you studied, Betty.

You earned that trophy.

Well, according to Mr.

Honey, Riverdale's victory has been tainted by a cloud of scandal.

So, it's been overturned.

Stonewall Prep wins again.

And I've been suspended, pending further investigation.

[SCHOOL BELL RINGING]

Before I say what I'm about to say, Fangs, I wanna make one thing clear.

This is not about me wanting to get back together.

Understand?

I've heard better opening lines.

I have a proposal for you.

It's good money, on-camera work.

It's a little weird, but it'll be infinitely less weird if I do it with someone I know.

On camera?

What're you talking about, Kevin?

Just promise me you'll keep an open mind.

Okay, stud?

Thanks for meeting me, Mr.

Keller.

I wanted to make sure you got your bonus, and to apologize.

I'm a grown man, Archie.

I can take care of myself.

Would you consider coming back to Andrews Construction?

You know that I want to, but if Frank's going to be sticking around, I just don't think that's a good idea.

What if I made you foreman?

Archie, you're a good kid.

You always have been.

But you trust too much.

I know who my Uncle Frank is, Mr. Keller.

Sure, he's a mixed bag.

But I can't turn my back on family.

I understand that.

Good luck to you.

I just pray that Frank Andrews isn't the end of your dad's company.

Thank you.

One Maple Rum Punch and one Maplejito for Mr. Arklight and his guest.

How's the front of house going?

Busy.

Word is spreading faster than a fire at Thornhill.

- Hmm.

- [CELL PHONE VIBRATING]

It's Pop Tate.

Apparently La Bonne Nuit just got raided again.

Heavens, whatever will your father find this time?

Let me think, a club of sweaty dancing teenagers imbibing virgin coladas, fizzy juice drinks, and coffee-infused colas.

To our two income streams being up and running.

I'll drink to that.

[PENELOPE]

Is this mask absolutely necessary?

It's mandatory, Mother.

Unless you want someone to find out your identity, you'll keep that false face on and stay within the walls of the Maple Club.

And if you get the itch to run that ankle monitor and proximity sensor I put on you will start screeching like a cat in heat, Mrs.

Blossom.

Take this as a win.

You're under house-arrest, minding our shop whilst we're in school.

But at least you're not in that petri dish of a teen sex bunker.

You're a pathological lunatic, you know that, Bret?

I know what you did to Betty.

Easy, Forsythe.

From what I hear, she did it to herself.

You consider yourself to be this elite man of honor, but you are nothing more than a joke and a coward.

You know, when you say things like that, Forsythe, it really upsets me.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Have I besmirched your precious honor?

- You're damn right, you have.

- Good.

Because as stated by the Quill and Skull charter, any dispute between two members can be solved according to the code of the society of the founding fathers.

A duel.

You can't be serious.

Oh, I'm as serious as a sh*t to the heart.

[CHUCKLES]

- Um - Are you scared?

No, amused at the thought of your ponytailed girlfriend - weeping over your dead body.

- That's not gonna happen.

So, sudden death?

Yes or no?

- Hey.

- Hi.

I got here as soon as I could.

What's going on?

[CRYING]

I just don't think I can do this anymore, Arch.

I keep waiting for Jug to come back, but he doesn't.

And he won't.

He won't ever come back.

And I don't know how I'm supposed to keep going.

Day by day, Betty, we'll get through this together.