(Elvis Presley singing "Don't"):
♪ Don't, don't ♪
♪ Don't, don't ♪
♪ That's ♪
- ♪ What you say ♪
- (phone buzzing)
♪ Each time ♪
- ♪ That I hold... ♪
- (sighs)
- (phone beeps)
- (song stops)
Hey, darling.
Shopping.
No, groceries.
And then yoga.
I got my new mat and everything.
Oh, you need... someone to be in for the new speakers?
(whining): I know, but I've got my new yoga mat.
Lunchtime?
Yeah, I will hurry back.
Okay.
All right, well, I better get at 'em. (sighs)
Yep.
And I will see you tonight.
I love you, too.
Bye-bye.
Bye-bye.
Bye.
(phone beeps)
(sighs)
(phone chimes, buzzes)
(sighs)
(ominous music plays)
(breath trembling)
(ominous music intensifies)
- (door thuds)
- (door open chimes)
(slams)
(sighs)
(grunts)
(opens door)
(birds singing)
(slams door)
- (phone chimes, buzzes)
- (gasps)
(heartbeat thumping)
- (ominous music playing)
- _
(heartbeat thumping)
(breath trembling)
(heartbeat continuing)
- (ominous music intensifies)
- (heartbeat quickens)
- (ominous music fades)
- (exhales sharply)
(birds singing outside)
(frenetic, driving instrumental music playing)
(engine starts)
(revving)
(tires screeching)
(frenetic, driving instrumental music continuing)
(woman speaking indistinctly over PA)
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
(woman speaking indistinctly over PA)
♪ ♪
Hi there.
Hi! Can I, uh, buy, uh, a ticket, please?
- To...?
- New York.
I would like the first flight to New York.
Certainly, ma'am. We have one leaving in minutes.
I can get you on that flight so long as you scoot.
- I can scoot.
- Okay, good.
You currently have a middle seat.
Would you prefer a window or an aisle?
- Uh, how long is the flight?
- It's five hours.
- Aisle then.
- Perfect.
Well, or-or a window seat.
Um... Indecisive.
- Okay.
- Window. No, aisle.
Should we just stay with the middle seat?
- That's the only one that I don't want.
- You don't want...
Don't ask me any questions!
Just give me a g*dd*mn ticket!
♪ ♪
(horns honking)
♪ ♪
- (horns honking)
- (siren wailing)
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
f*ck!
♪ ♪
Oh, f*ck.
(mutters): Calm down.
(man speaking indistinctly over PA)
(train rattling)
♪ ♪
(gasps)
(brakes screeching)
(noisy chattering)
IRISHMAN: Fiona, Fiona!
I'm fine. I'm in Scotland.
I like Scotland.
Listen, darling, we'll sort it out later.
Can I call you back?
(PA chimes)
WOMAN (over PA): The : Amtrak service
to Chicago will be shortly departing.
After you.
MAN (over PA): Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the : Amtrak service
from New York to Chicago.
We're glad you could join us on your trip today.
Hello! I'm Billy.
- Marjorie.
- How you doing?
- I'm Billy.
- Ruby.
Ruby.
- Where you headed, Marjorie?
- Pittsburgh, to visit my daughter.
- Where are you two going?
- I'm going all the way.
You sure you're ready for that? (giggles)
Marjorie!
Are you together?
No.
Strangers on a train.
WOMAN (over PA): Final call for the : to Chicago...
BILLY (muffled): But I bet I can tell you why she's traveling.
MARJORIE (muffled): Are you psychic?
(Ruby sighs)
I'm a palm reader.
Do you wanna see?
Can I have your hand, please?
- Miss?
- WOMAN (over PA): Final call
for the door on platform three. Final call.
- Thank you.
- WOMAN (over PA): The doors are closing.
The doors are closing.
MARJORIE: Here we go! (giggles)
♪ ♪
Well, go on then.
Okay.
(clears throat, inhales)
Okay, you see this one very strong line here?
- That is your heart line...
- Hmm.
...and that is deep, that is deep.
- It's deep, and it's long.
- Is she here for love?
Picture the kind of love the rest of us can only dream of.
- MARJORIE: Has she met him yet?
- Yeah.
A long time ago, but there's a break in the middle.
Hmm, a big one.
Is that why she looks so sad?
I think that's probably just her resting face.
And then this is her life line here, and today, that shows sexual arousal.
But the big news is that she meets the guy again, soon.
So, that's lovely for her.
All right.
- You wanna see skills?
- You don't have the gift.
Are you obsessed with little pigs?
- No.
- Do you go on about them all the time?
- BILLY: I don't think so.
- Did you see one documentary, and then, suddenly, you were an expert?
They sing to their babies.
They do not sing to their babies.
Hello.
Hi.
Still never miss an opportunity to wind me up.
It's like riding a bike.
MAN (sighs): That was a mission.
- Can I help you?
- Can I sit down?
Who is this man?
Oh, let's not play Alzheimer's now, Marge.
It's a new game, John.
- JOHN: Okay, well...
- (Billy chuckles)
...there's a double roomette and a cup of cocoa waiting for my wife.
If you see her, let her know, huh?
(giggling)
Come on, baby.
- I got you.
- Whoa!
MARJORIE: John, what's a roomette?
JOHN: What's a roomette?!
- Oh, f*ck.
- f*ck.
- f*ck.
- f*ck.
- f*ck!
- f*ck!
- f*ck.
- f*ck!
- f*ck!
- f*ck!
- f*ck.
- f*ck!
I have nothing with me!
Just in that moment, you just left?
- Yeah.
- So did I.
- You know it's been years?
- Yeah.
You remembered everything.
- First train after five.
- Yeah.
- I was sure you wouldn't be there.
- I was there.
All handsome.
Huh.
(mutters): f*ck.
(scoffs)
This...
- This is unforgivable.
- I know.
Really? People forgive all sorts,
- don't they?
- Not this.
Who does this?
Oh my God.
What will I say?
To who?
- Can we make a rule?
- Yeah.
So until tomorrow, can we have a moratorium on personal questions?
Okay.
You know a moratorium?
Do you remember that phase you had at college where you thought that the word
- "hirsute..."
- f*ck.
...meant the same as "therefore"?
- Yeah, all right.
- And you went around baffling people,
"Hirsute, we should probably conclude, blah, blah..."
All right, yeah, yeah.
What's a moratorium?
- It's a prohibition.
- Oh, then no.
No, that's not what it means, or no you...
- No, I won't do that.
- Why not?
- Because where's the fun?
- Oh, you want fun?
- Yeah.
- You don't have to play.
Hirsute, who's Fiona?
Fine, let's do a moratorium.
I'm hungry.
Are you hungry?
(train horn blaring)
♪ ♪
Excuse me. Sorry.
♪ ♪
(laughing)
Oh, hello.
(panting)
What's the rush?
I'm in a good fitness place.
(chattering, laughing)
(both sighing)
I need the bathroom.
- Poo?
- (groans)
Oh f*ck.
(panting)
(panting)
♪ ♪
(panting, moaning)
- (door clatters)
- RUBY: Oh, f*ck.
(clattering)
♪ ♪
(train horn toots)
(whispers): Hey.
- (passengers chatting, laughing)
- _
BILLY (on video): You think I have the answers to your life?
- I don't know you.
- (people shouting angrily)
f*ck off! f*ck off! I'm trying to be honest.
- Hey, what's that?
- (chuckles)
- Nothing.
- RUBY: Huh.
Okay, what can I get you today?
- Um, I will have...
- BILLY: sh*t. (clears throat)
- ...pasta and salad, please.
- WAITRESS: Sure.
- You're so decisive.
- He will have the same.
No problem.
You always want what I get, and then you end up eating mine.
And you don't think that I've changed since I was years old?
Oh, honey, there is always hope.
(sighs)
Oh, did you design your own house?
- Oh! Moratorium!
- (chuckles)
- Real nice.
- Please, no, no. Give me one thing.
I'll give you one back.
No, I don't know what to talk about.
- Whoa.
- What?
(whining): I'm a little baby girl.
- I don't know what to talk about.
- Okay, f*ck off.
- I choose career.
- Fine.
Um, I'm a senior architect at a firm in... the city where I live, and we specialize in green design.
- That's very cool.
- Yeah.
And what time was it when I texted?
- Morning. Why?
- Because it's a Tuesday.
Did you just walk out of your office
- and get in your car?
- Yes.
And you wear what you want.
I love it.
Your turn.
You can choose something other than career,
- if you want.
- Why?
'Cause I assume that you know the basics.
Why would you assume that?
Are you teasing me?
Are we going to pretend you've never googled me?
Yeah. Well, I know about the, the...
- "life coaching" seminars.
- Yeah. Yeah.
I have never watched them.
- Why not?
- It's the same
"Who me?" smile you were trying in college.
And honestly, it's weird enough seeing your face everywhere.
I didn't wanna find out... there was nothing behind the smile anymore.
(stifled laughter)
Okay.
I was gonna give you this.
(laughs)
Are you kidding me?
- Amazing Period?
- No.
Amazing. Period.
- But it sounds like...
- No. In America,
you say period instead of full stop.
No, it sounds like you're talking about how amazing women's periods are, which is fitting considering that I've heard it's f*cking extraordinarily condescending about the female experience.
And I wouldn't mind if it was aimed at men, but your marketing goes to great lengths to emphasize this massive female following.
So, I guess that's why I didn't watch it, 'cause I didn't want your new career as a prick to make me hate you.
(chuckles)
All right then.
- That was rude.
- It's okay.
No. Um, really,
- I'm not, I'm not even like that anymore.
- Excuse me.
- Wait, wait, wait. Where are you going?
- I'm going to the bathroom.
- Hey!
- I'm just going to the bathroom.
(sighs) That f*cking woman.
sh*t.
♪ ♪
(train horn blaring)
(muffled voices chattering)
Excuse me, sir.
Uh, I have your paper towels.
- I'm sorry, I don't...
- (stammers): No, don't get up!
Your friend will be along in a second to help you clean up.
She's just getting you a-another pair of... (whispers): pants.
- Thank you.
- It's okay.
You all pranked out?
♪ ♪
(phone chimes, buzzes)
Um, what time does this thing stop?
Eleven p.m.
Okay. Okay.
(PA chimes)
MAN (over PA): Ladies and gentlemen,
for those of you who have booked a roomette but not yet occupied it,
please make yourself known to a member of staff
- as soon as possible. Thank you.
- (clears throat)
- Did you get a roomette?
- You didn't?
No.
Come on.
(sighs)
♪ ♪
This is it?
What are you talking about?
This is good! Look.
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
(sighs)
- (knocks on door)
- MAN: Hi there. I'm Jack.
I'm your Amtrak bedroom attendant.
Well, you must be Ms. Dixie, and her guest, Mister...?
Um...
- Billy Johnson.
- Of course.
- We were worried you hadn't boarded.
- Worries are over, Jack.
We're here.
We've run away to be together, Jack. A bit nervous.
JACK: (chuckles) Now, that sounds fun.
Now, if you'd allow me some time with your room,
I'd love to perform a turn-down service.
Thank you, Jack.
My pleasure, sir.
- (whispers): He's a fan.
- (whispers): No, he isn't.
- (whispers): Look at this.
- JACK: I'm-I'm sorry, sir,
I-I forgot your name. What was it again?
Um...
Um, Billy Johnson.
JACK: Got it. We'll make an announcement when your room's ready for you.
Thank you.
Hey.
So, that's our bed.
That's my bed.
(phone chimes, buzzes)
(train horn blaring)
(sighs)
♪ ♪
Um...
I have to make a work call.
Laurence? Laurence!
Laurence? Can you hear me?
LAURENCE (static crackles):Yeah. Where are...
I... I can't really hear you. Can you hear me?
I am fine! Can you...
(phone beeps)
(train horn blaring)
♪ ♪
What's wrong?
Why did you text me?
(sighs)
We have a moratorium in place until tomorrow, so...
RUBY: No.
Why did you text me?
I've texted before.
Yeah.
But why today?
Did you break up with somebody?
(groans)
Uh... no.
- Do you hate your job?
- I've got the best job in the world.
Oh, don't be that guy because it doesn't work with me.
And, please, don't bullshit me that your life is so brilliantly perfect because if it was, you wouldn't have texted "RUN," and you wouldn't be sitting on this train.
You texted "RUN" back.
- Yeah.
- That's what set everything off, okay?
So, you're blaming other people for a choice that you've made,
- like you always do, so back the f*ck off.
- Like I always do?
Jesus Christ, you didn't have to come!
Maybe that was a mistake.
Do you wanna know why I texted?
It's 'cause I was drunk.
I was smashed off my tits, okay?
Oh, f*ck you.
RUBY: Hey, hey! Stop!
I've walked out on my life because you got f*cking wasted?
Hey, I guess so.
- Who the f*ck are you?
- Hey.
I don't know you anymore. I must be...
- (gasping)
- Oh no, don't do that.
- ...f*cking insane! What have I done?
- Don't, don't, don't. Stop.
Hey, stop. Stop. You know me.
(panting)
You know me. It's still me... behind the stupid smile.
(Ruby panting)
RUBY: Who is Fiona, and why did you tell her that you were in Scotland?
Okay.
She's my PA, and I just needed to tell her something.
I...
(sighs)
Okay.
What I should've told you, is that when I texted you, I was... getting hammered in the bar of a crappy hotel, which is nowhere at all near Scotland, and I had this moment of clarity... that there wasn't a single person
I had ever met in my entire life that I ever wanted to see again.
And then I thought of you.
♪ ♪
(PA chimes)
MAN (over PA): Ladies and gentlemen,
we will be pausing here at Wyeth Station, Pittsburgh,
for the next minutes, during which time
you're welcome to jump off, get some air...
- You do not still smoke.
- We will be leaving at : hours.
All right.
(sighs)
(train horn blares)
(phone beeping)
♪ ♪
WOMAN (over PA):
The : Amtrak service to Chicago
will be shortly departing from platform .
(line ringing)
Laurence?
LAURENCE (on phone): Ruby, where the f*ck have you been?
- Listen...
- Whatever this is about, just come home.
Just come home.
♪ ♪
WOMAN (over PA): The Amtrak service to Chicago on platform
will be departing.
Any station personnel, please depart the train immediately.
- (knocking)
- Ruby? Ruby?
♪ ♪
WOMAN (over PA): Final call for the Amtrak service...
Ruby!
MAN (over PA): Last call. Please take your seats. Doors closing.
Ruby!
♪ ♪
(panting)
f*ck.
♪ ♪
(panting)
♪ ♪
(door rattling)
(banging)
f*ck. f*ck.
f*ck.
(panting)
(panting)
I'm so unfit.
(panting): Did you... pull the handle off a toilet door because you thought I wasn't coming back?
No.
Toilet door handles are really bad for germs.
I find it's best to bring your own.
What about the flush...or do your poops... flush themselves?
(whooshes, sputters)
(body thuds)
- (laughing)
- BILLY: Jesus Christ.
You're still your own best audience.
BILLY: f*ck's sake.
My phone.
Oh. I got it.
("I'm Not Running Away" by Feist playing)
(PA chimes)
JACK (over PA): Announcement for Ms. Dixie and... her guest.
Uh, your roomette is now ready to occupy.
♪ I'm not running away ♪
♪ Water is running like I stay ♪
♪ Constant growing up ♪
♪ I'm not making this up ♪
♪ It got hard for me to believe in true love ♪
♪ Constant growing up ♪
♪ I'm not running away ♪
♪ I'm not running away ♪
♪ Yeah, I'm not running away ♪
♪ You got to carry me ♪
♪ Staying right here now ♪
♪ Carry me ♪
♪ Staying right here now ♪
♪ That's right, right here now ♪
♪ Carry me ♪
♪ I'm not running away ♪
♪ Water is running like I stay ♪
♪ Constant growing up ♪
BILLY: Do you get the feeling that we're walking away from something we can never walk away from?
(Dynamic instrumental music)
♪
(Feedback blaring)
I get louder every week.
♪
RUBY: I'm not the same person I used to be.
BILLY: I like you better already.
You're funnier. You're stronger.
(Shouting) You're sexier.
RUBY: Help.
WOMAN: (On phone) I'm glad she doesn't know of the real
reasons you texted her.
♪
RUBY: Do you want to be here with me, or is this about something else?
I wasn't totally honest with you.
I made a huge mistake, and I can never go back.
(Sirens wailing)
Okay, is that all?
No.
♪
Oh sh*t, oh sh*t!
Oh, we're going to hell.
(Laughing)
And I'm the violent one?
(Screaming)
♪
At some point we're just going to have to deal with the consequences before they bite us in the ass.
I mean, I can't blame it.
You've got such a nice ass.
♪