03x16 - The Fair

[bunniefuu]

♪ Da, da, da-ba-da, da, da ba-da-ba-da-ba ♪

♪ Da, da, da-ba-da, da, da Let's go!

♪ ♪ We'll be there ♪

♪ A wink and a smile and a great, old time ♪

♪ Yeah, we'll be there ♪

♪ Wherever we are, there's fun to be found ♪

♪ We'll be there when you turn that corner ♪

♪ We'll jump out the bush ♪

♪ With a big bear hug and a smile ♪

♪ We'll be there ♪

[Music]

[Calliope music plays]

Step right up, folks!

Step right up!

Come see the adorable bears for sale!

Just 25 cents!

For free, even!

Whatever fits into your budget.

All right, bros, time to step up our game.

Do a cute pose, Pan Pan.

[Drum roll]

Adorable!

Now you, little bro!

[Drum roll]

Oh!

So adorable!

Hey, mister, want to buy three adorable bears for 25 cents?

Huh?

Oh, uh...

All: Yeah!

Yeah!

Do it!

Do it!

Come on!

Come on!

Please!

Please!

Wait!

No, no, no!

Over here!

Over here!

Over here!

Yeah!

Us!

Pick us!

Wait, wait!

No, no, no!

Yeah, us, us!

Over here!

Over here!

Come on, pick us!

[Coin clanks, whirring]

You are making great financial decisions today.

Oh, sweet!

Gah!

Every single time!

Curse you, psychic machine!

Oaaah!

Aaaah!

Dang, Grizz, you're strong!

Have you been working out?

Oh, uh, yeah, man.

Feel my 'ceps.

Whoa!

Toned.

Hey, mister, want to feel my muscles?

Man: No.

[Sighs]

Not even my muscles can get us adopted.

[Sighing]

[Girl giggling]

Huh?

Huh?

What is it, bro?

[Giggling]

I love him!

Thank you!

I'm gonna name him Vavi!

That's it, guys!

We just got to become game prizes, and somebody is bound to want us and take us home.

I'm so smart!

Let's roll.

Stupid psychic machine.

[Grunts]

Why do people even like you?

So dumb.

[Whirring]

You will never be adopted.

[Creepy music]

All right, let's see what we have here.

[Balloon pops]

What about that one?

Panda: Looks too hard.

Maybe that one?

[Laughter]

That one's scary.

You're right.

Hmm.

Okay, let's see.

What's the easiest game?

This is the easiest game!

Um, ball toss!

Test your skills.

Uh, ball toss ...

y-you take the ball a-and toss.

Even a pet fish could do it!

[Crying]

Oh, my gosh.

D-Did something happen to your fish?

I'm so sorry.

[Groans]

Wow.

What a loser.

He's perfect!

All right, bros, stay professional.

[Bones cr*ck]

[Whimpering]

Ball toss.

Toss a ball.

Please?

Oh, man.

You really got to work on your sales pitch.

Aah!

What the ...

Oh, man, don't do that.

What do you guys want?

We can help you, you know, uh...

Louise?

It's, uh, "Lewis." It says it right here.

Hey!

We can read!

Um, okay, look, you guys really can't stand there.

My dear Lewis, what Pan Pan is trying to say is that we can help bring in customers.

What?!

[Laughs]

[Stammers]

H-How are you gonna ...

[Inhales deeply]

No, no, no, no.

I am not gonna listen to some baby bears.

[Indistinct shouting]

Oh, wow!

Are those the prizes?

Aww, they're so cute!

I-I-I'm sorry?

Yes, those bears ...

are they the prizes?

Um...

no.

We can be the prizes.

Try to win us.

Only $2 to play the game.

Wow!

Only $2?

That's such a great deal.

Yeah, we'd totally play for those bears.

For sure.

Uh, r-r-really?

Um, could you excuse us for a moment?

All right, bears, I'll make you a deal ...

you can stay if you help bring in customers.

Well, just until someone wins us, right?

We're trying to get adopted.

Huh?

Adopted?

Oh, yeah.

Sure.

Right.

Okay, Lewis, you got a mic?

And some fresh beats?

Uh, yeah, I think so.

All right, you got yourself a deal, Lewis.

Deal.

Hmm.

Strong grip.

[Click, hop-hop music plays]

Aww, yeah!

Coming straight from the fair.

Playing games and taking names.

You want to be next?

Tell 'em, Pan!

Both: Go!

Go!

Go!

Go!

Go!

Go!

Go!

[Rapping on music]

♪ It's Pan Pan coming up first ♪

♪ You should win the game by the end of this verse ♪

♪ Kickin' mad rhymes, never, ever rehearsed ♪

♪ It's time to get to work ♪

♪ Take your best sh*t, try hard ♪

♪ Win the prize, take us home to your backyard ♪

♪ You like bears?

Everybody does ♪ ♪ Take a look at my little bro, covered in fuzz ♪

♪ Three bears barely breaking a sweat ♪

♪ Everybody's jockin' us 'cause we're the best ♪

♪ But I'm already talkin' too much ♪

♪ Let me let my bro get some of this flava ♪

Yeah, boyyyy!

Okay, okay, nobody's won yet, but you're looking super-lucky today.

Let's see if you can give it a try.

♪ Play the game ♪

♪ Three balls, three tries ♪

♪ Three bears, your prize ♪

♪ You could take us home right now ♪

♪ Come on, Grizz, get on the mic and tell 'em how ♪

♪ Anyone can play this game, just watch, now ♪

♪ Take a throw, and the balls get knocked down ♪

♪ It's easy as 1, 2, 3 ♪

♪ Step 3 being taking bears home, you see ♪

Come on!

♪ Step right up, just take a chance ♪

♪ You could win big-time, cancel all plans ♪

♪ There's nothing more important you gotta do ♪

♪ than pay the man, throw the ball, and win, too ♪

♪ When it comes to prizes, bears are the best ones ♪

♪ Not stuffed, but the kind that can have fun ♪

You know, let's show these nice people what real fun looks like!

♪ Play the game ♪ Bust it, Grizz!

Bust it, Grizz!

Bust it!

Kick it, Pan!

Kick it, Pan!

Kick it!

Go, little bro!

Go, little bro!

Go!

Go, little bro!

Go, little bro!

Go!

Bust it, Grizz!

Bust it, Grizz!

Bust it!

Kick it, Pan!

Kick it, Pan!

Kick it!

Go, little bro!

Go, little bro!

Go!

Go, little bro!

Go, little bro!

Go!

Waaaaaugh!

Please, people!

It ain't that hard!

Is our dancing not inspiring enough?

Okay, you actually have muscles.

Come on!

Win it ...

for us!

[Grunts]

[Clank]

How could this be?!

Augggggh!

Wow, kid, you're strong.

You bench?

I not bench.

I bear.

Now begone with you!

[Sighs]

Dang it, Pan Pan.

I just want to be won so bad.

I know.

We just got to be patient, I guess.

So, should we dance again or something?

Both: Huh?

[All grunting]

Hmm.

[Grunts, clank]

Ow!

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!

What the heck?

[Gasps]

Lewis, what is this baloney?

This is rigged!

Hey, hey, hey!

Um, pipe down, you pipsqueaks.

Yeah, the game is rigged, but we can't have people just go and win everything.

T-That's just bad business.

W-What?!

You cheater!

You ...

You sneak!

You ...

You...

[Bell dinging]

...dingle!

Hey, man, this is a family-friendly establishment.

But if no one ever wins, that means we'll never be adopted.

Yeah, well, too bad.

You're bringing in the moolah, so you're staying here!

No!

We don't have to listen to you!

You're not our dad!

Nobody is!

Come on, bros.

Let's go elsewhere.

[Up-tempo music plays, girls laughing]

Oh, Lewis.

[Puff]

I-I-I can't allow that!

You're staying, whether you like it or not!

Wha...

No!

Let us down!

Help!

Grizz!

[Laughs evilly]

Grizzly: You can't do this, you cretin!

I-I won't stand for it!

Aw, beans.

[Grunts]

Hey, come on, you little rascal!

Get away from me!

Uh, Grizz, watch out!

Go left!

Go left!

Oh, no, no, no, my left!

Ha!

Gotcha!

What's happening?

What is that man doing with that child?

Oh, man, I wish I could take a picture with my phone or something.

Young woman: Should we call the police?

Is this stranger danger?

Hush!

Hey, now, no need for that.

Everything's good.

We're just playing.

[Laughs nervously]

Hey, kid, hush your face, or it'll be, uh, curtains for your brothers.

N-No!

No curtains!

Oh, how distasteful!

If only I could win them back myself!

Psh!

What?!

[Laughs]

"Win them back." No way!

You'd have to be the strongest person ever to knock them down, and you're, like, a kid.

Kids aren't usually that strong, you know, so...

Strong, eh?

Hmm...

All right, Lewis, I'll try, and if I win, I get my bros.

No backsies!

Well...

okay.

And if you lose, you stay with me...

forever!

Or at least till the summer job is over, so, like, two months.

Do we have a deal?

[Sighs]

Psych!

[Laughs]

I've never been able to do that before.

[Music]

[Laughs evilly]

[Whimpers]

[Sighs]

You can do this, Grizz.

Come on, you little bench boy.

[Grunting]

Panda: We believe in you, Grizz!

Remember your workouts and your so very, very toned muscles!

Right!

Tone.

Muscles.

Strength.

Power.

Weight.

Protein.

Uh, abs.

Get on with it, already!

[Music]

[Laughs evilly]

Rrrrr...

Raaaah!

[Slo-mo]

Whoa!

All: [Slo-mo]

Wow.

[Clank]

Whoa!

[Squeals]

All: Ooh!

[Squealing continues]

Dang!

Nice sh*t, Grizz!

That was smart.

You know, I was actually aiming for the bottles.

Oh, wait!

What am I saying?!

I got you, bros!

[Grunts]

There you go.

Now, let's blow this Popsicle stand.

Goodbye, Lewis, you fraud!

To freedom!

No more of your rigged, cheating ways!

Whoo-hoo!

Tell them, Pan!

Cheater!

Gosh, they're cute.

Hang on.

Did he say "rigged"?

[Squealing, groaning]

I think he totally rigged it!

Aw, man, this thing is rigged?

Um...

no refunds?

Hey, get that guy!

[Music]

[Panda sighs]

Grizz, is it our future to be taken advantage of at every turn?

I don't know, Pan, but I have a way of finding out.

Listen, sorry about earlier, my dude.

Please ...

tell us something good.

[Whirring]

The road ahead will be tough.

But as long as you stick together, your future will be happy and good.

Also, you will live in a cave!