04x30 - Wingmen

Episode transcripts for the TV show "We Bare Bears". Aired: July 2015 to June 2020.*
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"We Bare Bears" follows three bear brothers in their awkward attempts at integrating with the human world in the San Francisco Bay Area.
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04x30 - Wingmen

Post by bunniefuu »

♪ Da, da, da-ba-da, da, da ba-da-ba-da-ba ♪

♪ Da, da, da-ba-da, da, da Let's go!

♪ ♪ We'll be there ♪

♪ A wink and a smile and a great, old time ♪

♪ Yeah, we'll be there ♪

♪ Wherever we are, there's fun to be found ♪

♪ We'll be there when you turn that corner ♪

♪ We'll jump out the bush ♪

♪ With a big bear hug and a smile ♪

♪ We'll be there ♪

[Music]

[Video game music, punching]

Fire punch.

Pow.

Fire kick.

[Grunting]

[Groans]

Oookaaay.

Perfect.

[Camera shutter clicks]

[Chuckles]

Only 11 more to go.

[Camera shutter clicks]

Hey, man.

What are you taking so many selfies for?

Oh, it's part of this dating app.

The more selfies I take, the more matches I get.

The algorithm tells you when ...

Oh yeah, algorithms, nice...

Final stage.

Op!

My bad!

[Cellphone jingles]

Oh!

Yes!

Okay, now to send a selfie.

Ooh, this one.

Oh, that's nice.

[Music]

Oh, come on...

respond.

Ugh.

Oh, man.

Ah!

Okay, go!

Fire!

Fire!

Fire!

Fire.

Fire.

[Laughs]

Yes!

Finally!

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Ugh, my back.

[Joints cracking]

What time is it?

It's 2:00...

in the morning.

Ugh, I can't believe we stayed up that late.

[Yawns]

We should go to bed.

[Crickets chirping]

[Music box lullaby plays]

[Snoring]

[Loud Squawking]

[Snorts]

Huh?!

[Squawking continues]

Ow, what is this noise?!

Ugh, it's so loud, and I need a good night's sleep.

I used a premium collagen pack and everything!

Ice Bear's ready to fight.

It's coming from outside.

[Squawking continues]

What the...

[Loud squawking]

Wha...

It's a bird.

[Shushing]

Huh.

What kind of bird is that?

Oh, I just remembered!

I got this new app called the Bird'dex.

I can look up any kind of bird species with it.

Just got to line it up.

[Cellphone grid clicking, beeps]

This is the Red-tipped Larkatoo.

The Larkatoo is known for its terribly loud mating call.

Mating call?

Aw, this guy's looking for a girlfriend.

Huh.

Hope he finds one soon.

Also the Larkatoo's mating process could take weeks, even months.

They won't stop their mating call until they find a mate.

Months?!

[Echoing squawking]

Gah!

Oh, man, what are we gonna do?!

If this guy doesn't find a mate, we'll never sleep again.

Uh, maybe we can move him to another part of the forest?

Ah!

Let's mail him to Hawaii!

Ice Bear knows there's a boat to Alaska at dawn.

Cold.

Very cold.

Sounds good.

I'm in.

You guys, no!

This poor bird can't find love.

We should help him, not send him away to Siberia.

Alaska.

It's not right.

If we ever want to sleep, we've got to back him up.

Help him find another Larkatoo like him.

We've got to be his "wingmen"!

[Loud squawk]

Um, okay.

I guess I've always wanted to be a wingman.

Ice Bear will be Wing Bear.

Alright, bros.

[Joints cracking]

Let's get to work.

Larkatoos do not hear well.

So despite their loud mating call, other Larkatoos may be unable to detect when a mate is calling.

[Squawks]

Ta-da!

Larkatoo ladies of the forest...

[Squawks]

...my boy here is looking for a mate!

Here you go, man.

[Squawks]

Just ...

okay ...

put your beak...

[Speaker interference]

[Straining]

Stay still!

[Horn blares]

Ah!

To attract a mate, sometimes the Larkatoo needs to find new ways to stand out.

[Frantic squawking]

Okay.

Don't move.

Okay.

Looking good.

Okay.

Now just ...

just a moment.

Ooh, that's pretty nice ...

Hey!

Give me that!

No, come back!

The Larkatoo is not a picky lover.

It will go after any Larkatoo mate, regardless of compatibility.

[Grumbles]

No!

What are you doing?!

Don't give him Miki-chan!

Gah!

This is hopeless!

Nothing is working!

I'm just so tired.

Boat to Alaska hasn't left yet.

Oh, come on!

There's got to be a way to stop his squawking.

[Cellphone binging]

Are you still having trouble with the Red-tipped Larkatoo's squawking?

Yes!

Yes!

Please, we need to sleep!

Help us!

Don't worry!

There's one last way to accelerate their mating process ...

a dance ritual!

If the ambience is just right, and potential mates are near, the Larkatoo can easily meet a new mate!

You bros thinking what I'm thinking?

Panda and Grizzly: Prom night!

[Upbeat saxophone music]

We good?

Yeah, man!

Let's get this party started!

[Yawns]

Hey, birdie.

We invited the whole forest, so another Larkatoo is bound to hear about it and come.

I know what it's like looking for a soul mate.

It's not easy.

Look, I'm tired, but I really want you to find love.

I'm your wingman.

[Squawks loudly]

Almost there.

[Microphone interference]

Test, test.

[Clears throat]

Huh?

Oh, hey!

Our guests have arrived!

Yes!

Oh!

Come on over!

Welcome, friends!

Welcome!

[Hoots]

Oh, thanks for coming out.

Yeah, those snacks are for you.

Help yourself.

Oh, hey.

Um, anyone seen a Larkatoo?

♪ Whoa!

Aah-eee, ahh-eee, oh-wee-oh ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪

♪ Let me bring you to the ball ♪

♪ Spin you round, all around ♪

♪ Ask ya dip outside a while ♪

How's our guy doing?

♪ Take a drive, Saturday night ♪

♪ Come on get down wit it ♪

♪ Aah-eee, ahh-eee, oh-wee-oh ♪

♪ Now hear that sound wit it ♪

Hey, buddy.

You see another Larkatoo anywhere?

♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa Well, yeah ♪

♪ Aah-eee, ahh-eee, oh-wee-oh ♪

Oh...

Well, just be patient, man.

And sometimes, you just got to close your eyes and believe.

[Distant squawk]

Wha...

Huh?!

[Quiet squawk]

[Music]

[Trills]

[Music]

It's another Larkatoo!

Ah, we did it!

Alright, lil bro.

Let's set the mood.

♪ Don't you notice her?

♪ ♪ Look up, she sees you, too ♪

♪ No need to be so shy, she wants you to ask her ♪

♪ Just hear this song, there's nothing at all wrong ♪

♪ You got dance with her ♪

Alright, man, you got this.

Come on, dude.

♪ Hey, na-na na-na, birdie, don't you cry ♪

♪ Just got to hold her tight ♪

♪ Got to dance with her ♪

♪ Hey, na-na na-na birdie, go along ♪

♪ If you miss your chance, I'll never sleep again ♪

♪ Please go on, please go on ♪

♪ And dance with her ♪

[Strains, gasps]

[Squawks loudly]

[Record scratches]

[Hisses]

Ah...

[Squawking]


Ice Bear can't drop any more beats.

I guess we'll never sleep again.

I'll miss it so much.

Ugh, how can this be?

We did everything the Bird'dex said!

Why didn't he dance?

The Larkatoo mating dance is very peculiar.

Oftentime, young Larkatoos need a more-experienced Larkatoo to teach them the moves!

Okay, so all I need to do is teach him this dance?

I mean, looks pretty simple to me.

You just move your arms like this.

Okay, easy.

Grizz, I need another b*at.

I'll take care of the rest.

Oh, you got it, man.

One last try, little bro.

Okay, man.

It's not over yet.

Just watch me.

I'll show you the moves.

[Grunting]

Ooh!

[Grunting]

Ah!

Mmm.

[Animals murmuring]

[Ooh's]

[Humming, grunting continues]

Hmm?

Uh, Panda?

Panda, stop!

[Record scratches]

Wh...

Huh?

Whoa.

Wh-What's going on?

Uhh, why's everybody looking at me like that?

Let me just check the Bird'dex.

Be warned!

The dance is not exclusive to just the Larkatoo.

It will attract almost any animal in the vicinity.

Huh?

"Any animal"?

Ohhhhhh...

No!

Oh, no!

No, you've got the wrong idea!

Ohh, run for it bro!

[Shouting]

Just calm down, guys!

My brother ain't that hot!

[Squawking]

Gotcha!

Aah!

His love is too strooong!

[Squawks]

Panda: Aah!

Ah!

[Whimpers]

Stop, stop, stop, stop!

Whoa!

[Shouting]

Heel!

Land!

This was not the plan!

Ahh!

I'm sorry, Cellie!

Whoa!

[Whimpers]

[Howls]

Ah!

Gah!

Stay back, wolf!

Gah!

[Trills]

No!

There's too many of you!

[Shouting]

Panda!

[Screaming]

Huh?

[Larkatoo trilling]

[Eagle screeching]

Whoa.

[Trills]

[Screeches]

Panda.

Oh, my gosh, you're alright!

Ah!

I thought you were gonna get k*lled by the fall or get smooched to death.

[Chuckles]

I can't believe this little guy saved me.

Yeah, that was pretty awesome.

Tiny wing span.

Great strength.

[Trills]

[Gasps]

Oh, it's gonna happen.

[Singsong voice]

They're gonna hook up.

[Squawks loudly]

[All grimace]

Eh...

[Squawks]

[Both trill]

Huh?

She likes him!

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

It worked!

Oh, I'm so proud.

[Music]

And with that, we can finally go...

[yawns]

sleep.

Wait!

What about the crazed forest animals?

Huh?

[Swish]

Hey, what the ...

No.

Those are private!

No, stop looking at those!

All: [Grimacing]

Mm...

[Chuckling]

[Sighs]

Well, at least it's over.

Let's go home, guys.

Guys?

[Snoring]

Done.

Done!
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