03x18 - You Make Being a Priest Sound Like Something Bad

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Dynasty". Aired: October 2017 to present.*

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03x18 - You Make Being a Priest Sound Like Something Bad

Post by bunniefuu »

Previously on Dynasty... Next time I tell you you're being used, maybe you'll listen.

You should scold me in front of Michael.

That way he stays invested in you and the House of Deveraux.

They played me for the show.

Can you get the pills?

I'd have to find a way to steal them from the hospital.

I'm going to fire Carrington Atlantic's CEO, and the path will be clear for you to own C.A. again.

I do appreciate a woman who knows how to get her hands dirty.

I do have feelingsfor you, Cristal.

What do we do now? This.

♪ Jet fighter man, that's what I am ♪

♪ 'Cause tanks go too slow... Hi there.

Hey. You're up early.

Couldn't sleep. Too much nervous energy.

Well, if you wantanother way to burn off energy, you can always jump offthat bike and onto me.

No, it's just this clinic fundraiser is a never-ending to-do list.

Is that new priest from the hospital, is he helping you with this?

Uh... no, he's not much help.

I'll be fine.

How did you even know I was in here?

Fitness app.

I'm surprised to see you already up.

I heard the shower go on late.

Oh. Yeah, I'm sorry.

I tried not to wake you, but I smelled like a humidor on my way in.

You know, after an afternoon of contracts and lawyers, I got a little carried away celebrating at the cigar club.

But... once the ink is dry, Carrington Atlantic is mine again.

That's wonderful.Yeah.

You know what else is wonderful?

Now that all these shenanigans are done, you'll be seeing more of me.

And after the gala, I'll be ableto say the same thing.

Though I do need to see more ofyou, specifically this evening.

We havea dance lesson.

The hospital board somehow convinced me that we should end the gala with a special dance.

I'll be there.

But I'm counting that as exercise on this app.

God, you're so far ahead of me, you're putting me to shame.

I need a list of all the best presents I gave youwhile we were dating.

Uh, come in.Sorry.

Thank you. So, I may have accidentally discovered Liam's wedding gift to me.

And by "accidentally,"

I mean I was looking for it, I didn't think I was gonna find it, but then I did.

And it's beyond perfect, and now I can't risk being outdone.

Look at this.

It's our first marriage license.

From when we met at City Hall. He had it framed and matted.

I can't believe he held onto it.

You didn't put it back where you found it?

Oh, don't worry. Liam is out of town.

We have to pretend to be broken up so his mother will give C.A. backto my father; it's a long story.

So, gifts?

Start with the most expensive one.

Well, look at what he got you. It's not about money.

It should be something meaningful.

Right, right. No, totally. Of course.

So what are some meaningfulgifts that I got you?

Meaningful to Liam.

I know. I know. But ever since I found this, I haven't been able to think of one.

What's with all the dirty clothes?

And the, uh, the dead plant?

Hey, look. It's called being a bachelor.

I can do or not do my laundry whenever I want.

Mm-hmm.

Well, it seems like you chose to notdo.

And that, that is my mail.

Look at that. Are you going to Cristal's gala?

I guess so.

Wait.

I didn't know Kelly and Donna were performing.

Do you know who they are?

They are Liam's favorite band.

Yes, he plays their song "Lovelorn" all the time.

Like, weirdly, a lot.

This is the perfect present.

You're gonna invite him to the gala?

No! No. I am going to do one better.

I am going to get Kelly and Donna to perform at my wedding.

So, how excited are we about tonight?

Weare not excited about anything, because I am still mad at you for ignoring me about your friend Ramy and then lying to me about it.

But we have plans to go see Taylor Swift.

That's not happening. I don't even like Taylor.

That's a sentencel don't understand; why did you agreeto go months ago, then?

Because I was being nice. And we were still friends then.

But if you ever listened to me, you would know that I don't like her.

I do listen to you, Kirby.

Who's my favorite band?

Um... Moaning Lisa.

She actually doesn't sound familiar.

She is a them. See? You don't listen.

And going to a concert togetherwould be something that friendswould do.

And right now, this is a purely business relationship.

Remember?

Ooh! You look glowy.

Exercise bike.

Hey. Uh, actually, I need a favor.

I hear that Kelly and Donnaare performing at your event, and I really, really needto get a meeting with them.

Oh, I've only dealt with their agent;

I suppose I could give her a call.

Great! Now?

After the hospital.

I have a meeting at the PT clinic.

In that?

What?

Oh, no, nothing.

Just seems like more of an athleisure situation, but hey, what do I know?

This is last season.

Besides, I'm a Carrington. Can't show up in sweats.

Why don't you just call me when you talk to their agent?

'Kay.

Excuse me.

You look great. Thank you.

But I need to talk with you in private.

Yeah, well, I actually havesomething I want to tell you... anyway.

What is it? Here.

Is everything okay?

Um... I can't stop thinkingabout our kiss.

Neither can I.

It was a mistake.

I... It was a great mistake.

But it was a mistake, nevertheless.

I know.

Maybe it's the Catholic in me.

How can one kiss... make me feel so guilty?

Because we both knowthat it felt like more.

But I, uh... I took a vow of celibacy.

So we need to stopwhatever's going on here before it goes any further.

I agree. I took vows, too.

And I owe it to my marriage to uphold them.

Which would be easierif I don't go to the gala.

I think that's a good idea.

Because I decided I should tell Blake about this.

Well, you have to dowhat's right for you, and I understand the needto feel absolved.

Just make sureyou're considering how thiswill make Blake feel.

Look, I don't havea medical degree, but it looks like you'rerecovering quite nicely for someone who just had liver surgery.Thankfully.

Or else I wouldn't have been able to do half the things we just did.

I think we should repeat all the things we just did at least once a day. Normally, I would agree.

But... I need to focus on being good.

Trust me. You're doing plenty good.

That surgery should have k*lled me.

But for some reason, I was spared.

So, this is a chance for me to do better.

Now I want to pay it back.

Or pay it forward. Point is, I-I want to pay it.

So... unlike you.

It's like I just had sex with St. Adam, which is really kind of a turn-on.

Dr. Carrington.

Dr. Bailey needs to see you upstairs immediately.

What about? This?

Oh, she's not a patient.

Something about stolen medication?

Don't bother denying it, because there were eyewitnesses.

Supplies, meds, anything else you stole?

Dr. Bailey, eyewitnesses are notoriously unreliable.

And security cam footage.

Less unreliable.

Do you have anything to say for yourself?

There's a shelter down the street.

It was out of supplies...

Stop. That shelter doesn't need any help, Dr. Carrington.

This is disappointing.

I don't want to have to recommend to the board that you be fired, but... Fired?

What about a warning? Warnings are for things like having sex in the supply closet.

How many cameras are there in this place?

I won't take pleasure in punishing you, Doctor.

Well... at least not in this way.

So, it'll be sad to see you go.

Mm-hmm. Right.

You've had it out for me ever since I turned down your advances my first week on the job.

I resent that accusation.

Maybe we can work something out.

Guess you'll want this, then.

You can keep it until an official decision is made.

I'll see you tomorrow night at the gala.

You can plead your case when you give me a tour of the manor.

I'm sure it has a lot ofempty rooms and... dark corners.

How'd your meeting go? Word travels fast.

You sure have a way of making enemies.

So, how can I help you, Ms. Carrington?

Actually, Ican help you, Brooke.

Help you witha big commission.

My fiancé is Kelly and Donna's number one fan.

So I would like to hire them to play at my wedding, as a surprise for him.

Because, you know, what's a better wedding gift than that?

Probably nothing. But I'm afraidyou need to keep shopping.

Shrewd negotiating. I like it.

Uh, I will also cover all travel expenses for them and their entourage.

And if they don't havean entourage, which is sad, I'll buy them one. There you go.

Well, I wish it was only about money, especially after seeing this.

But the ladies don't tour anymore.

They just record.

They're wealthy and only play events that are meaningful to them.

I am so sick of meaningful.

I know. But they love charity.

Elephants, orphans, veterans.

Well, if I told them how much Ilove charity, would that maybe help my chances? It might.

They just played an event for their sorority, Lambda Lambda Nu, because all the proceeds went to feed the homeless.

Lambda Lambda No Way...

I mean... Oh, my God, are you kidding me?

That is mysorority.

Maybe I should give my sisters a tour of the revamped physical therapy clinic they'll be playing for.

Well, I'm sure that would go a long way with them.

Fantastic. I'm gonna leave that right there.

Will you please tell my fellow Lambda Lambda Nus how excited I am to meet them? Yeah.

'Cause you know, there's no bondquite like sisterhood.

I'm not telling them that.

No. No.

Moved.

Ew, no.

Swiping up. New dating app?

I'm actually just trying to findsomeone to go to Taylor Swift with me tonight, but no one's front row material.

That's the nice thing about being married.

You have a plus-one built right in.

Yeah, I guess so.

Well, where's the, uh, redhead from down under?

She's mad at me.

Actually, do you want to go?

Oh, God, no.

I'm just gonna havea chill dinner here and then go to bed early.

Totally get it. Though for someone that just had liver surgery, you look great.

Yeah, I feel great. I mean, you know, if-if you want, we could get a bite to eat...

Love to. I mean, we-we never really get to hang out, and this is the perfect opportunity for us to rekindle our... acquaintance.

Finally. I've been waiting.

The dance instructor is gonna be here any minute.

I didn't miss anything?

I wanted to talk to you before he got here.

I-I apologize, but I had to stop on my way home to pick up this.

Wow.

Blake, this isn't something you just "pick up."

Well, nothing is too good for my wife.

So... if there's somethingyou want to talk about, you'll look like a couplemillion bucks doing it.

Hmm?

I... Wait now, okay? Hold that thought.

This will just take a minute. Hopefully.

What's the latest over there?

You're not the dance instructor.

And you're not Ginger Rogers. I'm glad we got that straight.

Ooh.

Nice bling.

I see someone's been putting her allowance to good use.

It was a present from your father.

Oh, God. Well, then, I am sorry.

For what? Having a generous husband?

Right. You have a safe in your closet filled with enough diamonds to buy an island, but my father just happened to pick up thisseven-figure treat just because.

No. He obviously did something wrong.

Isn't that kind of a cliché?

Well, so is getting married three times, but he nailed that one, too.

You mind if I just...?

Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep.

That is the "Daddy did somethingvery, very bad" gift.

Mm-hmm. I've seen it before. Alexis had a few.

Even fake Cristal got one.

He's obviously hiding something.

Anyway, have a great lesson.

Laura Van Kirk screwed me.

I just found out thatCarrington Atlantic oil tankers are being held up in Moldavian shipping lanes.

Held up by what exactly?

The government wants to nationalize oil, and get rid of C.A.'s presence there once and for all.

So the C.A. tankers reloaded their oil, took off.

But the king won't allow them outside Moldavian waters?

Exactly, and that's when Lauradecides to sell me the company.

$500 million worth of oil could be lost.

Well, I'm not just gonna give it to them.

Clear my schedule.

Fuel up the jet.

We're going to Moldavia tomorrow.

Where's the instructor? Let's get this over with.

I sent him home. We can practice.

Though you don't seem to be inthe best frame of mind for that.

Honey, I'm here.

Can I ask you a question? Mm-hmm.

Why did you buy me this necklace?

I told you. I haven't beenthe greatest husband and I want to get yousomething nice.

Is there a problem?

No, it just caught me by surprise.

It's so extravagant.

Next time I'll surprise you with a scented candle.

And who were you reading those contracts with here yesterday afternoon?

Like I told you, it was the Van Kirk lawyers.

What is going on here?

Why am I getting interrogated for buying you a necklace worth more than the GDP of most countries?

You seemed to like it fine when I gave it to you.

I did, but then Fallon came in.

Oh, what did my wonderful daughter have to say?

She said it looked like an apology gift. Well, the only thing I have to apologize for is being a thoughtful husband.

Blake, you're overreacting.

Oh, am I? I'm sorry.

Would you like another piece of jewelry?

It won't happen again.

I'm about to be fired.

How can they fire you? Your lastname's all over that hospital.

That doesn't hold much sway with Dr. Bailey.

Maybe this'll make you feel better.

I think this is bigger than an ice cream sundae.

Cristal saw me afterwards, she had this smug smile on her face, like it had made her day.

She's probably already told Blake.

Which is ironic, because she's hardly been Mother Teresa these days.

"These days"? Something happen?

Uh, nothing.

I probably shouldn't talk about it.

Oh.

So you just don't trust me.

No, I-I'm trying to rise above the idle gossip.

Oh.But y... I'm sure I could tell you.

Um...

I saw Cristal kiss a priest.

You-you can't say anything. Promise me?

I promise. Uh, does she know that you saw?

No, and to be honest, I feel bad for her.

Seeking comfort in the arms of a priest?

She's got to be in a lot of pain.

I'm sorry, did you have a livertransplant or a brain rewiring?

Because that doesn't sound like you.

I know. I'm kind of surprising myself.

I usually don't gossip, but Sammy Jo is really gonna die when he hears about this.

No... Kirby, Kirby. You just promised you wouldn't say anything.

Good point.

Mm-hmm. But you can't godown to Dr. Bailey without a fight.

You know, I like secretly dating a doctor.

Do you have a ball gown?

In my opinion, Kirby needs to get over it.

I mean, I'm the victim here. Are we still on this?

I trusted Ramy, and I was robbed.

How does that make me a bad friend?

It sounds like Kirby was trying to warn you, and you just didn't listen.

Yeah, yeah, that's what she said.

Excuse me, sir. Yes, sir?

Um, I would love another drink, please.

Actually, Sam, uh, I'm gonna, I'm-a call it a night.

Now? Yeah.

No, no, no, no. We're having a great time.

No. He'll have another water, please. Thank you.

Okay, but I'm gone after this one.

My point is, yeah, maybe Ididn't listen, but a bad friend?

A bad friend is someone who stabs you in the back.

Or someone who lets you wear lime green even when it isn't your color.

: Or, well, apparently, someone who gets great seats to a concert.

That Kirby has no interest in going to.

Well, that's her loss.

Oh, she texted me.

It's four letters. What is this, a code?

Something the kids are texting nowadays?

Mia?

Jeff Colby.

I thought that was you.

Wow, you look... Careful now.

Amazing.

Even better than you did in college.

That works.

I, uh, I met Mia duringorientation week, freshman year.

Uh, of all the bars in Atlanta, you walk into mine.

Humblebrag.

I'm Sam. I own a hotel.

Oh. Okay.

I moved to town last week.

I'm here for a friend's bachelorette.

And I better get back to bridezilla now, but... let's catch up?

Yeah. Yeah, I'd like that.

His heart rate went from 60 to 155 in the middle of the afternoon.

How do you know that? Blake and I synced our exercise apps as a way to motivate each other.

So I looked at it and saw the spike when he was supposedly reading contracts.

My husband had sex with Laura Van Kirk while I... we were planning the foundation's event.

It's humiliating.

What we did was wrong, but different.

Technically, cheating is cheating...

but you're right.

It is different.

So, what are you gonna do now?

I don't know.

It can't be a coincidence thatsomething happened between them the same day he got C.A. back from her.

What, you thinkthat he slept with her to get his company back?

Maybe.

I just know he'll do anything for Carrington Atlantic.

But would he do anything for you?

And here's the new wing.

What charitable cause didyour chapter at NYU support?

Uh, oh, what cause didn't we support?

You know? What cause?

Homeless dogs.

Homeless dogs?

And cats, of course.

And people, obviously.

Well, that's adorable.

A true sister thinksof everyone, big and small.

Mm.

So our agent said that your fiancé is a big fan of ours?

Yes, yes, yes. He is like a teenage girl.

But you know, in the manliest way possible.

So, what do youthink about us playing a few songsfor your wedding?

I think I could kiss you.

Listen, you would be a part of the greatestwedding present ever, and I would win.

On three.Yeah.

Oh, it's not just a normal shake?

No, I don't want that.

She's trying to do the secret sorority handshake with you.

Donna, leave the poor girl alone.

Code blue, OR One.

Code blue, OR One. Remember?

Yeah. Yeah, of course I remember.

I just... I forgot to tell you guys I am a full-fledged germophobe, so don't take that personally.

Oh, of course not.

But we can't wait tohear your speech tomorrow night.

My what? Aren't you speaking at the galafor the clinic?

That's what the host does.

Tells the story about how this whole idea started.

It's so empoweringto see young women leading the way.

We're excited to hear it.

Oh, and I'm excited to give it.

It's gonna be an unbelievable story.

Remember, I was dating that guy. I couldn't... Look at you two.

Rekindling away. Hey, Sam.

Didn't expect to see you here... again.

Mia and I are catching up.

Oh, nice.

Continue.

It was after college. Remember?

I was living in that tiny apartment downtown.

Oh, yeah. That place was terrible.

But that was where we finally hooked up.

Hello.

Now I'm interested.

And then she went and got a job in Philly.

I was ready to try long distance, but you said we were too young.

That we owed it to ourselves not to be tied down.

Mm. Nice line, player.

Oh, well, you know I was right.

And it was funwhile it lasted.

Pretty much two ships passing in the night.

Yeah, timing never seems to work out for us.

Oh, timing is overrated.

Trust me, I dated a married guy before and, well, it didn't work out, but maybe it will for you.

You're married?

About five months.

No ring.

I, uh, guess I'm justnot that used to it.

None of us are, really.

Okay, so, uh, I will see you at the gala tonight.

Where's Blake? I guess he's still getting ready. He can be a little vain.

Oh, thanks for the news flash.

But I see you are stillwearing the necklace, which I assume means you talkedand straightened everything out.

Unless you chose to ignore itand just keep the diamonds, which is totally understandable.

Everything is fine. Okay?

Well, great, because I have a favor to ask.

I know, I know, two in two days.

But I promise, after this one, I am willing to call it even, on account of all the lying you did to me. What is it, Fallon?

Would you mind if I gave a speech tonight?

Specifically, the keynote.

I know how much trouble it isto host these things, so I thought I'd help out.

You know, take something off your plate.

Are you thinking, or...?

This is my event, Fallon.

I have an entire speech writtenthat I will be giving.

But thanks for the offer.

Mm.

Never mind.

Scotch, neat.Culhane. Culhane.

You were the presidentof your fraternity, right?

Actually, the treasurer.

Okay, that's a little sad.

But you're my experton Greek life, so I need your help with the Lambda Lambda Nu secret handshake.

It's impossible. You have to bedouble-jointed or something.

I watched the video online, but they don't show you the whole shake.

So I'm hoping you canteach me the rest.

Well, I can't help you because I don't know it.

That's why they call it a "secret" handshake.

Seriously?

All this for a wedding band?

They are not a wedding band.

Liam loves Kelly and Donna.

The only way he'd be happier is if Starship played for us.

He likes Starship?

I know. It's weird.

But anyway, if I can't get Kelly and Donna, then I am back to square one.

So what? It's just a present.

You really don't understand.

If this fails, the universe is telling me that we do not belong together.

Well, at least you're not overreacting.

Well, I guess we can't all havethe perfect relationship, like you and Vanessa.

I don't want to talk about that.

Didn't these women already agree to play at your wedding?

Sort of, but they won't if they find out the truth.

Which is why I need to master that secret handshake and work on my speech on how I started this program.

But you didn't start th...

You'll never get away with this.

Where are you going?

Why aren't you dressed?

Honey, there's a crisisin Moldavia that needs my immediateattention.

A crisis. Really? It's serious.

I'm leaving now.

Oh. And are you going alone?

No. Anders is going with me.

What am I supposed to tell people?

No one will even notice that I'm gone.

Trust me, all eyes are gonna be on you.

What about our dance?


Oh, honey, you're the love of my life.

My company's in trouble.

If I stay and do nothing, it'll be fatal.

Our marriage is in trouble.

But apparently that's a risk you're willing to take.

I don't have a choice. This is my legacy.

I'll be back as soon as I can and I will make it up to you.

No, thanks.

Dr. Bailey, you strike me as a chardonnay drinker.

Brassy, bold.

Knows what she likes.

Well, I do know what I like, and you clean up well.

Thank you.

I was hoping that we could revisit the discipline that you're bringing against me to the board.

You mean the disciplinethat you brought on yourself by stealing? Right.

It was for a worthy cause.

If I could just explain myself...

Save it. It's not aboutwhy you did it.

It's about what you did, and now, it's about who you need.

I'm open to working outan alternative punishment.

I have a soft spot forpale men in tuxedos.

You're an incredibly beautiful woman, and, um, I'm very tempted.

But I'm not gonna give in to temptation tonight.

Wow, nice dress.

Back in my closet before midnight, Cinderella.

Hello, everybody.

My name is Fallon Carrington, cofounder of the Carrington Foundation.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Now, as much as I would love to stand up here and give this speech all by myself, which I totally could, it is time for me to introduce you to our other keynote speaker so we could tell you how excited we are about this project.

So, without further ado, Cristal, come on up here.

Cristal?

I guess Cristal's in the ladies' room.

Luckily, I have written some words of my own.

We saw a need in our community and answered the call.

The new physical therapy clinic will provide hope and relief for veterans.

It will be a refuge for them, and hopefully an inspiration to everyone.

And that is all any of us can hope to be.

When I first mentioned this idea to my husband...

To... to my father, my father, he told me that, as a couple... of Carringtons... philanthropy is not a choice, but a way of life, and he is so right.

That's one of the things that made me fall in love with him.

And by "him," I mean this project.

So, you know what, that's enough about me.

Now, I think you would rather hear from the people you came here to see in the first place.

So without further ado, Kelly and Donna, get on up here.

Uh, before Kelly and I do a set, we always sing the Lambda Lambda Nu chantAlways.

For good luck.

And tonight, we are lucky enough to have a fellow sister with us to do that.

Do you mind?

We're gonna post it to our social so every chapter can see it. You know what, though, I'm much more comfortablewith the handshake, so let's just dothe handshake.No.

Y-You'll be fine. Ready? On three. One...

Two, three.

♪ Who, who, who are we?

♪ We're the best sorority

♪ Prettier girls, shinier hair

♪ All our sisters walk on air

♪ Who, who, who are we?

♪ We're the best sorority

♪ We've got style through and through. ♪ Who? Who?

Good job, you guys. Kelly and Donna. Wow.

That was so good!

Okay... You're not one of us.

No, I'm not. I'm not.

I'm sorry. But I cannot tell a lie.

At least not twice. What kind of person lies about beinga Lambda Lambda Nu?

Well, the type of person who was trying to impress you so that you would hopefully play at my wedding.

But you know what? But all the charity stuff, that was totally real.

Fallon, did you just read my speech and pretend you started this project yourself?

We are so not playing your wedding.

No! Not even "Lovelorn"? But that's Liam's favorite song.

"Lovelorn" is not evenour song.

That's the Kelly Sisters.

Are you sure?

I'm gonna go. I'm gonna...

How-how was that for an opening act?

Um, uh, Kelly and I will be right back with a k*ller, uh, performance.

Um, just working out some technical difficulties.

I didn't realize you'd actually be here when I said, "See you at the gala."

Wouldn't miss that car crash we just saw.

This hospital saved my life.

Plus, I deeply enjoy showing up at these events because it drives Blake insane.

Not that I've seen the bastard.

I owe you an apology.

I should have realizedyou wanted to be alone with Mia today, but I guess I was feeling lonely.

Apology accepted.

And that apology goes for last night, too.

You wanted to go home, and I just kept talking about Kirby, who has been avoiding me all night.

Up until 30 seconds ago, so was I.

Okay, okay, I-I get it.

I need to listen more. Read the room better.

Don't tell me, tell Kirby.

I will. I'll just have to beg her forgiveness.

Turns out galas aren't reallythat much fun when you're alone.

Speaking of which, where's your other half?

I'll be straight with you. Uh, my marriage is a... complicated arrangement.

Isn't everything with Alexis?

Seeing Mia last night made me realize that part of the reason I married Alexis is because I thought I was dying.

And now that I know I'm not dying...

You want to be with Mia.

I don't know.

But I do know I regret letting my friendship with her fall apart.

Dr. Bailey is much sexier than I was expecting.

She's still goingto the board.

I did everything I couldto convince her, but once her mind's made up, there's nothing I can do.

So you'll work at another hospital.

I don't know. Maybe I'm notmeant to be a doctor.

Of course you are.

Look, why don't we go play darts?

We can pretend that the board is Dr. Bailey's head.

I'd really ratherjust go home.

I'll get our coats. I'll meet you out front?

Thank you for coming. Have a good night.

Great gala, Cristal.

I'm glad someone had fun.

I didn't. And it seemslike it was a disaster, but that's not whatl want to talk about. I don't have time for this.

Oh, good, then I'll make it quick.

I know you're in favor of Adam getting fired, but you're gonna use yourconnections, talk to Dr. Bailey, make sure that doesn't happen.

And why would I do that?

He's paying the price for his actions.

Huh. I'm just curious, what's the price to pay for someone who commits adulterywith a priest?

So glad we understand each other.

Not sure if "entertaining" is the right word, because it was alsoembarrassing.

For me. I was, I was embarrassed for you.

Right. Is this your attempt at helping?

Not at all.

But I know where your brain is going.

And the only thing that tonight proves is that you would make a terrible sorority sister.

It also proves that I knownothing about Liam.

Not even his favorite band.

Do you think this weddingis a huge mistake?

This wasn't about making Liam happy.

This was about making you happy.

No. If that were true, I would've bought a silk Valentino jumpsuit.

This was for Liam, you know?

For him to realize how much I love him.

That shouldn't require all this hoop-jumping.

Not everything needs to be such a huge production.

Yeah, but that's what I do.

You know, big, dramatic statements that are unforgettableand put everyone else to shame.

And don't forget how touched you were by Liam's gift, and that was just a piece of paper.

Well, I'm assuming that wasn't the whole gift.

As long as Liam knows you love him, that's all that really matters.

Hey, Cristal, I-I'm so sorry about the whole stealing your speech thing, butyou were nowhere to be found.

It's fine. That's the least of my problems.

What is going on?

Either Kelly or Donna atetoo many shrimp and is now sick.

But since they're a duo, one won't sing solo.

And if there's no performance, then people won't have a good time, and if people don't have a good time, then they won't donate money and this whole night will have been for nothing.

And you took offyour necklace.

Yeah. You were right about it.

Well, I owe you a favor.

So let me see what I can do.

I'm sorry, but Kelly doesn't feel up to performing tonight.

I hate to let everyone down, but I can't sing a duet without the other half of my duo.

: Hey. Lucky for you, I can carry a tune pretty well.

People came to this gala to see me perform with Kelly.

Not some lunatic who pretendsto be someone she's not.

But people will be pretty upsetwhen they find out that Donna is short for prima donna and that you refused to perform for a charity because your partner OD'd on hors d'oeuvres.

I also have a healthy online following.

Do you know any of our actual songs?

Uh, why don't we justgo with a classic?

You know, just in case.

Uh, ladies and gentlemen, Fallon Carrington has agreed to sing with me tonight.

And now it's time for our gracious hosts, Blake and Cristal Carrington, to take the dance floor. ♪

♪ Is love so fragile

♪ And the heart so hollow

♪ Shatter with words ♪ Impossible to follow

♪ You're saying I'm fragile

♪ I try not to be

♪ I search only for something I can see ♪

♪ I have my whole life

♪ And I am stronger than you know... ♪

What are you doing here?

Well, I couldn't stop thinking about that lobster toast with the avocado and the fancy peppers.

Yeah, I remember. They were delicious.

So delicious.

I couldn't stay away.

From the lobster toast?

♪ I need you to love me... From you.

♪ Lovers forever ♪ Face-to-face

♪ My city, your mountains

♪ Stay with me, stay

♪ I need you to love me ♪ I need you today

♪ Give me your leather

♪ Take from me my lace

♪ Take from me my lace ♪

♪ Take from me ♪ My lace.

Thanks again for stepping in.

You sounded great.

Aw, well, it was for a good cause.

And you know, us Lambda Lambda Nus have to...

Sorry.

Habit.

So I was thinking... Mm?

I can talk to Kelly, see if she's upfor playing your wedding, since you filled in for her.

Oh, well, you know what? Since you guys weren't even the right band, I'm actually good.

But do you happen to know the Kelly Sisters?

Tell me that there's some relation, or...?

You guys all hang out?

I guess not.

Only you could completely humiliate yourself and still end up winning the night.

Well, like any skill, it only gets stronger the more you practice.

You know, maybe if you used that skill for good, you might know what to do for Liam.

No, I do, I do. Thanks to you.

I have decided I am going to write Liam a song and perform it at the wedding.

He will bea puddle at the end.

Kind of like when John Legendwrote "All of Me" for Chrissy Teigen.

Yeah.

Maybe I should just getJohn Legend to write it.

No, no, you're right. I'll write it myself.

So thank you. Of course.

Now I need a favor from you.

Dominique and Vanessa have beenusing me as a pawn for ratings.

They faked a fight so Vanessa could look like she was on team Culhane.

Now I need to strike back.

And there's only one name that comes to mind when I think of revenge.

Fallon? Aw!

I'm flattered. Thank you, Culhane.

Now, the first thing you need to know about revenge is that sometimes you got to play the long game.

I finally figured out what your text meant.

What text?

This one. "I-M-U-B."

"I miss you, buddy."

That was an accidental text.

IMUB doesn't mean anything.

You're reading into something that literally means nothing.

Oh, well, it meanssomething to me.

Because IMU... B.

We haven't talkedin two days, which is, like, forever in us time.

And I don't want to lose you.

So I am just gonna relax while we rekindle our friendship.

What are you wearing?

An itchy polyester blend T-shirtof a band I don't even know.

That's how much I love you.

And we should watch the concert.

It's livestreaming from Australia.

I know.

That's why I'm here, not in Adam's loft.

Also, he's in a bad mood.

Thanks for this.

IMUB, too.

I promise I'll be a better listener.

Okay.

You better start now, because I have some very juicy gossip.

What did we do?

You broke your vows, I broke mine.

You said our kiss was a mistake.

Yeah, well, we make mistakes.

We're only human.

Hmm. Hello?

Want to come over?

:It's Adam.

Booty call.

Here.

Um, I can't.I'm watching a concert.

Watch it later. I'm in the mood for celebrating.

Bailey left a message. She changed her mind.

See? I focused on being good, and it paid off.

Sometimes karma isn't a bitch.

Wow, I'm so happy for you.

Maybe someonein a more forgiving mood heard about your little problemand had a chat with her.

Anyway, I, um, I can't come over right now, 'cause I'm gonna spendsome time with my friend.

Aw.

Um, but if you stay uplate enough, Sam usually falls asleeparound midnight.

Hello?

Um...

Cristal. Adam, what are you doing here?

Blake's pilot just called.

He and Anders had some trouble with the government at the Moldavian airport, and apparently, they've been kidnapped.

What?
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