04x04 - Happy Ummaversary

[bunniefuu]

Hey, Appa.

Hi, Janet. You come early.

Yeah.

Doesn't mean you can leave early.

Thanks.

( Appa sighs )

Did you ask?

What?

If you can wear her shirt.

You wearing Umma's shirt.

( Laughs ) This is my shirt.

Okay.

I bought it at Kensington Market, like, a month ago.

And my style is anything but Ajumma style.

What's Ajumma style?

You know...

"Oh!

I don't wanna get too dark sun tanning.

( Laughs )

But in secret I am...

( Imitates Darth Vader ) Darth Vader."

( Laughing )

( Imitates choking )

Hi, Janet. What you doing?

Oh, I just came in from outside.

Oh, good. Smart to cover up.

Don't want to get too dark from sun tanning.

Hmm.

Huh! What you think of Janet's shirt?

It's okay. Not really her style.

It's a great shirt. And not yours.

Yeah. First mine, then Value Village, now yours.

You're making that up.

Next time if you like my shirt, tell to me before I donate.

And just between us, it look better on me.

Bye!

( Appa chuckles lightly )

( Doorbell chimes )

Ooh. Now you wearing Appa's style, huh? ( Chuckles )

Oh, I don't mind.

( Theme music playing )

What happened to floor?

Time takes toll on everything.

And someone scraped it with a dolly.

Time takes toll.

I have to see Mrs. Lee.

If you go to wholesale, maybe you pick up some flower.

Why?

Umma: Because flower is pretty and nice.

Make house bright and remind us of good thing.

( Appa sighs )

Hint-hint...

( Door shuts )

The flowers?

For your anniversary?

Oh...

You have to do something.

I do something. I stay married for 28 year.

Appa...

Appa: Janet, when you get older, you learn anniversary is just way for card company to make money, with flower company and swan boat ride company.

Big conspiracy.

Whatever.

Eh, you think it's so important, you do something.

Actually, I was thinking of hosting a surprise dinner for you guys. At my place.

You know how surprise work?

But I thought I should talk to you first because I was gonna invite the whole family.

You, me, Umma... and Jung.

Yeah.

Because I know Umma would really like that.

Probably.

So would you be up for something like that?

Maybe.

But I don't think Jung would come if he knows I'm coming.

Jung has moved on. You're the one who...

Who what?

Nothing.

I'm not the one with the problem.

Jung is usually the one with the problem.

Well, he has no problem with this.

Fine. Tell me when is dinner.

Thursday works for Jung.

Oh, yeah, I guess we just work around Jung's schedule.

Appa...

Okay.

Great.

And bring flowers.

Why?

Hey, so you told me to pick up pastries for tomorrow's meeting.

What are we thinking?

Uh, pastries.

Got it. But, um, various, shapes and sizes...

Just have fun with it?

Yeah.

This is so stressful.

Hey, Terence. Just arriving.

Terence: Can't talk.

Jung: There she is.

Looking good, for a boss. Or something more...

Thanks. ( Chuckles )

But maybe don't lean on my desk like that.

( Clears throat )

Too sexy?

That, and it kinda blows ( Whispers ) the covert entrance we're going for.

( Whispers ) We nailed that so hard.

Sure, just one small thing...

Oh, I grabbed your coffee when I got out of the car.

Right. ( Chuckles awkwardly )

And when you come in, might be better to just be like, "Hi, good morning," so it's like the first time we're seeing each other.

Gotcha. And just so I know, how long are we planning on keeping up the whole spy movie entrance thing?

Uh, for as long as we both work here?

But I could, like, tell close friends, right?

Just to be safe, let's not tell anyone.

I just don't want anything to change, you know?

I just think that if we approached this right and we come up with a game plan to tell everyone, people might be into it.

Right. Yeah, but it's tricky 'cause I'm a woman in power, which means everyone is just waiting to catch me out so they can say I'm unfit or emotionally unstable.

Yeah, makes sense.

Which part?

Um...

Look, it won't always be like this.

Well, unless we work here forever.

Exactly.

Janet: So, Umma, any big plans this week?

Yeah, going to Superstore with Mrs. Lee and getting big box of rice cr*cker I like so much.

And that's it?

That's a lot.

Superstore, rice cr*cker.

Sometimes I think you have ADD, Janet.

It's just there's something Thursday that I thought we could do together that'd be fun.

Oh, Janet. What?

It's a photography exhibit that I'm in.

Oh.

But I was thinking you can come to my place beforehand, we could have drinks, then go together.

Yeah, but I just go to your photography show.

Help you get award. Best to go out on high note.

This is different. It's my best work.

Very personal and all about family.

Maybe your Appa want to go this time. Or Jung. Or Appa.

It's just they can't make it, like, at all.

So you'd be the only one from the family that could come to this really important exhibit that's all about family.

Okay.

Great.

It's gonna be really special.

I have to think so.

( Inhales ) Otherwise we get depress.

Jung Kim! Where you been hiding?

Sorry. Big date.

For two days?

It's busy season.

Nice.

And you know I'm all about my boy livin' his best life, but a "Hey, bud, don't wait up," wouldn't k*ll you.

My bad.

"My bad" accepted.

Now dish. Have you met the Hermione to your Ron yet?

A gentleman never tells.

Well, whoever these ladies are, I'm impressed.

And frankly, a little relieved you dodged the Shannon b*llet.

Uh, yeah. ( Chuckles )

Swing-and-a-miss, b*llet. ( Laughs )

Don't get me wrong, I loves the Shannonigans...

For sure.

I was just worried you'd get with her as soon as Alejandro bounced.

Well, he didn't bounce, she dumped him.

Probably for a reason.

But... ( Chuckles ) Yeah, Shannon's so not my jam.

Plenty of fish, right?

Aritzia Girl. Or Keg Waitress.

Totally.

Oh, my God, are you dating Keg Waitress?

Definitely not. And by the way, she's a manager now.

Oh. Good for Keg Waitress.

( Doorbell chimes )

Mr. Kim. At the risk of being formal, how are you?

Okay.

Have you ever heard of a soft opening?

Like, new s*x something?

No.

When a high-end restaurant opens its doors to reviewers and influencers, before the rabble ruins the place.

Free appetizer?

And more.

Open bar, cigar lounge.

Gorgeous servers, and in this particular case, us.

Oh! You serious?

Thursday. Seven o'clock. The party begins.

( Sighs ) Thursday?

Save the date.

Save date for what?

An unforgettable evening of gratuity.

Shall I arrange an Uber Black?

Yeah. It's just, uh...

I have to work at store Thursday.

What?

I can watch the store.

Me and Janet can do photography show other time.

Mrs. Kim with the glove save!

Yeah.

No.

Why? What's problem?

I have to... wax store floor.

You know, because of a scratch and time take a toll...

Wax another day. Moscow mules await.

No. Have to wax the floor.

And you have to go to Janet photography show.

Well, you're a better man than I, and a better father than a friend, that's for sure.

( Sighs )

( Door opens )

( Laughing )

Good morning, Shannon.

( Whispers ) Maybe don't sit next to me.

( Whispers ) Right. Wasn't going to.

( Clears throat )

Well, guess I'll just have a seat next to the boss. ( Chuckles awkwardly )

( Grunts, chuckles ) Thanks a lot, guys.

Oh, good morning, Shannon.

So, I'll keep this short.

The head office is rolling out a new initiative called, "Go the extra mile."

Will there be an exam? I don't want this coming out of nowhere, like the pastries.

You had a week, Terence. ( Laughs )

Anyway, it's a new program designed to make our customers feel heard...

Oh, you got a little something there.

And you, Kimchee, have something on the sides of your head.

Your earlobes. ( Laughs )

Let me just dust those off for you.

And you, sir, with that big old neck.

( Laughs ) Like the Eiffel Tower.

Or La Tour CN. ( Chuckles )

And Mr. Fuzzy Sideburns here. Wolf man. Love it. ( Chuckles )

And, Stacie, these shoulders...

No.

Shannon: Right.

Where was I?

Uh, the point Shannon's trying to make is we're all about better customer service.

Exactly.

So, just to be clear, is it no to touching customers or yes to touching customers?

Hey. Nice cover at the meeting.

Are you kidding? I touched everyone's face like a pervert.

You're being paranoid.

Stacie just said hi to me. Hi from Stacie?

And Kimchee knows for sure.

Nah, trust me. He told me I dodged a b*llet not getting involved with you.

Really? A b*llet? Like, dating me would k*ll you?

Yeah! So he's the last guy that's gonna suspect we're together.

But what did he mean by dodge a b*llet?

Nothing. That's positive.

You dodge a b*llet, and you're alive. It's a good thing.

Not if you're the b*llet that people need to dodge.

He meant more like it would ruin our work dynamic.

You know, how you were saying that how women bosses are crazy and stuff?

What?

Who cares what he thinks.

You're a b*llet I'm happy to take.

And the point is, your secret is safe.

Our secret.

Hi, guys.

Stacie, hey.

That was a totally normal, "Hi, guys," right?

It was until you said that.

What is this?

Wax buff machine.

Mr. Addy is a janitor, he get for us for free.

Oh, that's a nice shirt.

( Exhales )

Yeah, want to look good for customer. ( Chuckles nervously )

Might get dirty. Not my favorite shirt, so maybe okay.

( Umma grunts )

Oi, what you doing?

Help.

But you have to go to photography show with Janet.

Most important.

There's lots of time for that.

The sooner we start, the sooner you can finish.

Yeah, but once I start, I can't stop until finish.

Yeah.

( Cell phone rings )

Umma: Hi, Anjali. Young-Mi!

Great news! Sanjiv hurt his back!

Oh, yay, that's good news. Thanks for calling.

Best to Sanjiv.

( Whispers ) Keep going.

Mrs. Mehta: He gave me his tickets to a swanky restaurant opening tonight.

Oh.

Mrs. Mehta: Cocktails, champagne, the works!

You'll be my plus one.

Yeah, yeah, I might have time for quick drink.

Mrs. Mehta: I'm leaving now. I'll text you the details.

Umma: Okay.

Okay...

Have to go. See you.

Going now?

Yeah.

( Stammers )

Bye.

( Exclaims )

( Wax machine whirring )

( Sighs )

( Door opens )

Appa: Hello!

( Janet sighs )

Appa: Hi.

Where's your Umma?

She's late.

Like you.

Ah.

I bring gift for you and Jung.

You used to love as a kid, huh?

Uh, mostly Jung. Was his favorite.

See, I not the problem. ( Sighs )

"Thank you, Appa. So kind, so thoughtful."

Where are the flowers?

What flower?

Oh, my God, I reminded you, like, three times.

But I bring cookie, and you don't even remind me one time, huh?

Where's Jung?

He's not here yet.

Ha! See?

( Knock on door )

( Whispering ) It's Umma! Hide!

Why?

( Breathes deeply )

Surprise!

Hey. When does this start again?

Janet sighs: Twenty minutes ago.

Where's the wine?

Oh.

I'll be right back.

Seriously?

Sorry, I got a lot going on.

It's okay, Jung, we forgive you for being late and forgetting wine.

No, we don't. And you both came late and empty-handed.

Not empty hand. And Jung little more late than me.

But not bother me.

Hey, Appa.

I was waxing.

A little manscaping. I hear ya.

Oh, I bring this for you and Janet.

Oh. Uh, thanks.

Hmm. Not a problem.

Hey, Kim-cheese. ( Chuckles awkwardly ) What's-a-happenin'?

Just ordering the new "going the extra mile" signage.

What's-a-happenin' with you?

Oh, the uje. Working.

( Clears throat ) Then on the personal side, I'm just living that single life. Livin' it large.

Hells yeah.

You got anything exciting on tonight?

Nah.

Honestly, I'm still processing the big break-up with Alejandro.

Feels like I really dodged a b*llet with that one. Right? ( Chuckles awkwardly )

I don't know if you dodged a b*llet.

You dated him for two years.

Sure, but what went wrong? Was it me?

Am I a someone who's bad to date for some reason?

No. You're amazing.

Any guy'd be lucky to be with you.

So if I was, say, fired from a g*n, you don't think there's anyone who should get out of the way?

Uh... maybe everyone.

Why did you tell Jung that he dodged a b*llet by not dating me?

Oh. Yeah... That's not about you being a bad person.

It doesn't feel like a compliment.

I like you, I like Jung.

But you're a serial monogamist, and Jung is a serial... the opposite of that.

I just think there's potential for you both getting hurt.

Aww, that's sweet.

Then I'd always have to be choosing between my boss and my boy, and it'd be stressful for me here and at home, and it'd just... kinda suck for me.

Maybe sweet's the wrong word.

Wait, why did Jung tell you that?

Oh!

You guys are dating?

Oh!

Yo! That's so great. Congratulations!

Thanks. But we're trying to keep it on the DL.

Right, 'cause if it blows up, it won't be a big, embarrassing thing for you guys.

No, that... That's not it at all. ( Chuckles awkwardly )

Okay. Then why are you keeping it a secret?

Hey, guys.

Was that kinda weird?

Yes. You hear it, too.

Attendant: Thank you.

Oh.

So fancy. And a real towel.

Those actually stay here.

Oh. Yeah. ( Chuckles awkwardly )

( Cell phone rings )

( Umma clears throat )

Janet? Oh, no, I lose track of time.

Sorry, I missed your photography show.

No, you didn't miss it. There's still time.

Just come to my place now, and we'll go together.

Oh, but Mrs. Mehta is still dancing.

Where is she? Maybe we go meet.

No, I prepared all this.

You got a quiche from Sobeys.

Umma over phone: Janet? Mmm-hmm.

Oh, I love this song. ( Chuckles )

Janet: Umma, are you coming?

Yeah, yeah, I leave now.

Right after I finish this s*x on the Beach.

Ooh.

( Beeps )

( All sigh )

Yeah, I'm actually gonna take off.

You can't. This is important to Umma.

Obviously not.

Where do you have to be anyway?

Let him go. You plan not work. We do this other time.

There is no other time.

If you want to go, go.

It's just a wedding anniversary, nothing special.

What's that supposed to mean?

Okay, let's not get all...

I don't think you understand what I talking.

I think I understand exactly ( In Appa's accent ) what you talking.

Maybe we should have the cookies now.

What's your problem?

I don't have a problem. You brought it up first.

Please, let's not get into it.

What I bring up? Tell to me what I bring up!

Stop it!

This isn't about you. Or you!

It's my anniversary.

Dad, you and Umma never celebrate.

That's what he was talking about.

He didn't think you didn't think it was special.

He and Umma don't think it's special.

But I do.

And I thought maybe it was worth celebrating, with all of us.

But if you wanna leave, leave!

And we can forget about this stupid party that no one wants!

Umma: Knock, knock. Hello?

( Door opens )

( Door closes )

Janet! I'm here.

Oh, thanks to so dangerous taxi.

Jung? Appa?

Why you both are here? Something wrong?

No, we're here because of you.

For a surprise party.

So... surprise.

Yeah, surprise.

Surprise from me too.

For your anniversary.

( Umma exhales )

( Umma gasps )

All of you organize this?

Yeah.

I organized it!

I bought wine.

I mean I forgot it, but...

And I bring flower. Next time.

So you do all this?

Well, I got the food, made some snacks, did the decorations, bought the baguette you like from the French bakery...

Okay, okay, we all say thank you, Janet.

Did you?

Oh, don't pick fight, Janet.

We all here. That's most important thing.

( Snickers )

Umma: What?

Well... shall we sit?

Umma: Mmm.

Yeah, okay.

Something burning?

Oh, my God!

Dunzo. Nothing like an end of day trunk lunk.

You've a smudge of something on your face.

Let me go the extra mile for you.

( Terence laughing )

( Stacie laughs )

Did you guys notice how long Shannon kept her hand on me at the meeting?

But clearly the biggest connection was between her and Jung.

There's a little somethin'-somethin' goin' on. ( Chuckles )

Okay. I would like to say somethin' about that little somethin'-somethin'.

Yeah. Uh, Shannon would never do something as unprofessional as date someone on staff.

That was a totally normal, professional face wipe.

I thought the sideburn rub was pretty professional.

And I didn't mean to react harshly to your shoulder touch, I'm just shy.

Trying to be friendlier, say hi more.

Shannon: Right.

And really, when you think about it, is it so wrong to date someone at work?

I'm so glad you said that.

How do you feel about dancing horses?

Because I have two tickets to see Cavalia.

No, Omar, I...

Thank you, but no.

What I'm saying is Jung and I are in a relationship.

Oh.

And it's an amazing relationship. Very strong.

I have a great feeling about how long it's gonna last.

You're overdoing it.

Maybe I'm just more confident.

Well, anyway, now you know.

I know we only have a few minutes left, but let's make then count.

Stacie, do you like horse-dance theatre?

Can I have both tickets?

( Laughing )

Hope it wasn't too overcooked.

No. Just enough overcook.

I know it's not easy for everybody to come. Or to cook.

But this is first time we all eat together in 15 year.

Sorry, just so touched.

And tipsy.

Doesn't make less special.

Mmm.

Well, you and Appa deserve it.

Because of you two getting together, we're all here.

( Exhales )

( Jung clears throat )

We go. Look like Jung is leaving.

Actually, I was just grabbing these.

We haven't had dessert yet.

Oh, yeah.

Okay. Thank you.

Mmm.

Yeah.

Ah.

Jung: Hmm.

What's the expiry date on these?

Janet, don't be the problem.

Hey, how was dinner?

Uh, good. A little burnt, and calories per portion were high, but...

I meant having dinner with the family.

Oh. Uh, not sure. Not great, but... not terrible.

( Knock on door )

Did you order another pizza?

No.

Hey.

Hey, Kimch, it's our boss Shannon from work.

Come in, come in.

You remember Kimch.

Everyone knows, buddy.

Yeah...

Really? That's great.

That's great, right?

Yes.

I really wanted to tell you.

It's okay, Shannon filled me in.

I thought maybe we could grab a drink.

Yeah, I got some beers here.

Yeah, yeah. We could drink in this apartment.

( Clicks tongue ) Grand.

Guys, Gwen's coming over, so I was hoping to have the place to myself.

Oh, right. We could go out, grab a drink.

( Whispers ) Thank you.

Or better yet, we could grab some beers and hit the park.

I can only do so much.