05x04 - Tennis Anyone

Episode transcripts for the 2016 TV show "Kim's Convenience". Aired October 2016 - current.*
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"Kim's Convenience" is the funny, heartfelt story of The Kims, a Korean-Canadian family, running a convenience store in Toronto's Regent Park.
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05x04 - Tennis Anyone

Post by bunniefuu »

(SHOP BELL JINGLING)

(TENNIS BALL BOUNCING)

Beautiful day!

UMMA: Yeah, perfect day for exercise.

I get lots of exercise, take out garbage.

Get more playing tennis.

Ah, too much work to do, huh?

Ask Janet.

Last time Janet get stuck in net.

- Mrs. Mehta?

- Swear too much.

- Mrs. Lee.

- Grunt too much.

Yobo, you are only one who is good for me.

(SIGHING)

Yeah, but have to watch store.

Gerald can watch store.

Then have to watch Gerald.

Yobo, I want to play while I'm still strong enough to play.

Okay.

Ahhh!

I said okay!

Yeah, but you don't say fast enough.

♪ JANET: Hey, Marcus?

Can I talk to you for a sec?

Sure.

I heard you say you watched Endgame with a projector.

I'm just wondering what kind of projector it was?

I don't know.

I, uh, borrowed it from a friend.

Huh.

I wonder if it's the same kind we have here.

Maybe the same one?

Uh.

Not sure.

Remember, I was showing photos on it yesterday?

Oh, I put it away.

Yeah, someone left it out so I locked it up in the file drawer downstairs.

Oh.

Cool.

Yeah, and someone also took the AV cabinet key, so that's why it's downstairs.

Right.

Makes sense.

I'll find out what my friend's is and let you know.

Great, thanks.

Sorry.

I left the projector out.

I forgot.

And I took the cabinet key by mistake.

It happens.

But just so you know, things can go missing around here pretty quickly if you're not careful.

- Right.

- Maya!

I'm gonna need you to check the tents for the trip.

Yup, already on it.

And where are we at with Marcus and the projector?

Yeah, simple misunderstanding.

He didn't take it.

I...

I moved it downstairs.

KWAMI: Great, glad to hear.

He's a good kid.

So, camping trip sounds fun.

I went when I was in the program back in the day.

But it's probably nothing like Tanzania.

Kwami told me you were just there.

Yeah.

I would love to see your pictures sometime.

Definitely.

You should come by.

Really?

Oh, uh, okay.

Maybe Thursday?

Oh!

Okay, sure.

Why not?

Though full disclosure, I live with my parents.

I know that sounds lame.

Hey, I get it.

It's probably cleaner than my place.

- I'll see you then.

- Cool.

We'll get our Thursday night chill on.

Or just hang out and look at pictures.

Yeah.

(CHUCKLING)

Just a little bit more.

Okay... now.

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

Surprise!

What's this?

Fancy tennis court for fancy player.

You!

No.

Tennis court in our neighbourhood has no net, broken glass, two shopping cart and raccoon nest under bench.

So beautiful.

I let you in from inside.

Yobo, we don't have to break in.

Almost there!

Is a public tennis court.

For people who live around here.

But we don't live around here.

Nobody know that, huh?

Just have to act like...

You remember to lock BMW?

No, because we bring Lamborghini.

Oh!

(LAUGHING)

Morning.

(GRUNTING)

Ah!

- .

Ah, you don't have to say every time.

We both know what score is.

Ugh!

Ah!

Game and set!

Time out.

Have to give to you break.

(LAUGHING)

(APPA PANTING)

Morning.

Morning.

Beautiful day here in our neighbourhood...

where we living.

Yeah, though not my favourite way to start the day.

More of a golf guy.

Yeah?

Me too.

Where do you play?

Oh, you know, whatever course I can get to.

Augusta, St.

Andrew, Pebble Beach...

Wow.

You've played 'em all, huh?

Whenever I can.

My business keep me very busy.

What kind of work are you in?

Oh, you know, import-export.

Canned good, cleaning product, magazine, gum, ice cream, everything.

Wow!

Uh, you?

Nothing too exciting.

Doctor.

Well, foot surgeon.

But don't roll your ankle, I'm off duty!

Oh!

(LAUGHING)

Well, they seem to be getting along.

Yeah, he rather talk than play.

Oh, my God, same.

Hi, I'm Eleanor.

Young-mi.

That's a beautiful name.

Thank you.

Are you guys new to the neighbourhood?

No, just new to tennis court.

Usually, we play at racket club but today weather is so nice.

APPA: Yeah, Jays can't rely on the bullpen.

They're burning out!

Uh-oh, they talking baseball.

Then, we have time for a quick set.

Okay.

I hope you don't mind losing.

(LAUGHING)

Oh, you're terrible!

No, really, I'm very good.

♪ (KNOCKING)

Oh, hey there, Omars Bar!

You know what, I shouldn't really call you that.

You're too sweet already.

As well as nut-free.

Thankfully, that's not true.

My uncle wasn't so lucky.

He had both of his removed.

Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry.

I meant...

It's okay.

It runs in the family but I get tested regularly.

Anyway, I was just wondering if I could maybe leave a bit early tomorrow.

Of course.

You definitely want to get that checked out.

And you can bet your boots we're doing Movember this year, mister!

No, it's not that.

And that's prostate.

It's my cousin's wedding this weekend so my family's actually in town.

Oh, wow, that's so great!

That's so exciting.

Yeah, it's... it's okay.

What?

It's just whenever my family visits, they're always like, "Omar, are you seeing anyone?" When are we going to meet your girlfriend?" Ugh, I've been there.

My family is super traditional and all my friends back home are married, so every time I see them, it's like I've got this giant fertility clock ticking above my head.

Tick-tock, with every month, another egg slipping into oblivion.

Right...

The point is, they just want us to be happy.

So, tell 'em what they want to hear, even if it's a little bit of a fib.

So, lie to them?

It's just easier.

TBH, I do it all the time.

Does this car have winter tires?

Sure!

Did Snowball get her rabies sh*t?

You betcha!

That doesn't sound safe.

Oh, it's fine.

She's not really a biter.

And the entire time, I thought "embarazada" meant embarrassed.

So, now a waiter in Spain thinks I'm pregnant.

(ALL LAUGHING)

Yeah, European vacation... so crazy.

Oh, don't get me started on Paris!

I know.

I don't want to start, too.

Well, this was fun.

We should do it again sometime!

Yeah, who knows, very busy.

Yeah, so many import-export trade show to do.

Are you this way?

What street are you on?

One with big tree and three-hour parking.

(LAUGHING)

Maplewood?

Uh-huh.

Okay, see you!

Oh, well, we have friends who just moved onto Maplewood.

What number are you on?

Well, what number is you friend?

- Three nine...

- Eight?

Well, we is , so...

Small world!

But big street.

(LAUGHING AWKWARDLY)

Well, we're just past there.

We'll walk with you.

Oh, okay.

So, Paris.

Leave it up to us to find the worst crêpe restaurant in the world!

Wow, what a gorgeous home.

Yeah, so big.

Great lawn.

APPA: Yeah, well, you know.

UMMA: To go with our beautiful garden.

I know.

The flower beds are amazing!

Thank you.

Okay, see you.

ELEANOR: Who did your brickwork?

We'd love their number.

Oh, he's very busy, so he had to retire.

Then, pass away.

Oh, that's a shame.

The point work is amazing.

Yeah.

Okay, bye!

See you guys.

Yeah.

(DOOR OPENING)

Have you accept the Jesus into your life?

(MOTOR REVVING)

(HORN HONKING)

MAYA: Who's that?

Oh, that's just a friend from Tanzania.

I mean, she's not from Tanzania.

I met her there but she's actually from here, so...

I meant the old guy.

Oh!

That's Dave.

He's hilarious.

Cute.

You want a glass of wine or something?

Oh, uh, yeah.

Great.

These are incredible.

JANET: Everyone there is so amazing.

Warm, friendly...

- (MAYA'S PHONE BEEPING)

- Oh.

JANET: What?

I was supposed to meet a friend later.

She's not far, but...

You need to go?

I'd rather be here.

Well, if she wants to come by, she's welcome to a drink.

- Really?

- Definitely.

Hey!

Oh, hey, sorry for interrupting.

That's okay.

Gerald, Chelsea, this is Maya from work.

But we're not working right now, we're just friends.

Work friends!

So cute!

I'm opening a bottle of wine if you guys have time.

Oh, well, my shift is over!

No.

We're catching a movie and if this guy drinks, he'll fall asleep.

Maybe a quick glass?

Oh, bum-bum.

You snore when you drink.

So still a no?

You're hilarious.

MAYA: Have fun, you guys!

Remind me to never get old.

(JANET LAUGHING)

Ooh, white.

My favourite.

I know, Pinot Grigio, but it's actually good.

Cheers.

So good!

GIRL: Hey, Maya?

Oh, down here!

Oh, uh, Lola, this is Janet.

Janet, Lola.

Hi.

Is that wine?

Yeah, just some "peanut greejo".

You want some?

It's Thursday night.

But sure, what the heck!

Great!

And because you seem like good people, and my family, I discounted the extension.

Omar!

Okay, see you guys tonight.

Uh, correct me if I'm wrong, but do I see a bit of a family resemblance?

Oh, my God.

Is this...

Hey!

Uh, this is my dad and my sister, who were just leaving.

Aww, it's so nice to meet you.

And Omar is one of our star employees!

I'm Shannon.

See?

This is Shannon!

Good work, boy.

Omar finally bagged a winner.

Uh, sorry?

We need to get a photo for Nanna.

My phone's in the car.

We'll be right back.

You are so much prettier than Omar described.

What's going on?

Well...

I took your advice and told my family I have a girlfriend.

So, if you wouldn't mind playing along for now, please?

Oh, my God.

Me?

Sorry.

I just thought Jung's away and you're easy to describe so...

Okay, what else have you told them?

That we've been seeing each other for three months and our first date was at Bass Pro.

Seriously?

What?

We had a great time.

Oh, my God.

She's beautiful.

Janet took that.

She's an amazing photographer.

Is that Florida?

Tanzania.

(GASPING)

Cool!

'Kay, smile.

Girls' night!

Send it to Ryan!

- Shut up!

- Who's Ryan?

Goes to our school.

Maya's got a huge crush on him!

Used to!

Okay, I don't!

We should play a drinking game.

Never Have I Ever!

No.

That's stupid, right, Janet?

Sorry, what school do you go to?

Don River Secondary.

Blecchh!

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God, look!

Ryan texted back.

He's asking about Janet!

Send him a boob sh*t.

You send him a boob sh*t!

You send him a boob sh*t!

Yeah, we're wrapping this up.

Lola, call an Uber!

Yeah, I actually gotta use the bathroom.

That's not a bathroom!

(RETCHING)

Mm, that's my closet.

(BABY CRYING)

So, Shannon, what do you like to do for recreation?

Oh, my God, Dad.

Ignore him.

Oh, but keep holding Sadie's head.

Oh, yes, sorry.

And how old is Sadie?

Four months.

Wow.

Very healthy.

You see?

You feed her too much.

She's a baby!

So, do you use white strips?

You're worse than your mother.

May she rest in peace, and I'm sure she does!

Your teeth are like sunspots!

Oh!

KIMCHEE: Hey...

Kimchee!

This is Omar's family.

From Saskatoon.

Yeah.

Nice to meet you all.

Feel free to stay and hang out.

Actually, I'm gonna head 'er.

And if you're talkin' to Jung, tell him I found his earwax syringe.

Who's Jung?

A valued colleague.

Okay, well, we should be wrapping things up.

Okay.

We will see you two tomorrow.


- Dinner's at eight.

- Sounds good.

Uh, sorry?

Okay, say bye-bye to Auntie Shannon!

FATHER: There's this great restaurant that we always go to when we're in town.

Oh, I don't think we can go because...

we have to work late again tomorrow.

So, we'll...

see.

Right, Omar?

Yeah, sure... honey.

Nonsense.

Their mirza ghassemi's to die for.

Your fingers are like pencils!

Like beautiful pencils!

Leave her alone, let's go!

Okay, this has gone too far.

I am so sorry.

And you're gonna deal with this before tomorrow, because I am not holding that -pound baby again.

GERALD: It was a good film.

Chelsea fell asleep.

I did too, but at a different part, so we were able to piece most of it together.

How was your party?

It wasn't a party.

Did your friends know that?

They weren't my friends.

Well, one was.

I mean, they're cool, they're just...

in high school.

Oh.

So, you were baby-sitting?

We were hanging out and I thought they were older, okay?

Okay, cool.

Just maybe don't mention that I was there.

- (JANET'S PHONE BUZZING)

- Oh, no.

- Cops?

- No, Kwami.

Maya didn't show up at work.

I gotta go.

Oh, and if I was there, I definitely didn't see any alcohol!

Oh, hi, Eleanor, it's Young-mi.

on Monday is good.

See you then!

Who is?

Leave message for Eleanor.

We playing tennis on Monday.

Yobo, we say one time only.

But she's very good tennis player.

And we have so much in common: church, kid, music...

I like John too, but if they finding out...

They not gonna find out.

(PHONE RINGING)

Oh, hi, Eleanor.

ELEANOR: Hi, you busy? No, no, just hanging out by pool.

- (APPA CHUCKLING)

- Hey, can we do Monday? Uh, I can do o'clock.

No problem.

Are you home now? Sorry, what?

I said are you home now?

UMMA: Yeah. Then, I'll pop by with the clubs.

What club?

Golf clubs for Sang-Il, from John.

But he already have golf club.

John offer me his old golf club.

Mastiff s.

We can't take!

But he just get for free and he gonna throw out, anyway!

Maybe bring on Monday.

It's fine.

They're in the car.

I'll be there in .

APPA: Tell John thank you!

(CHUCKLING)

What you doing?

Get free golf club.

What's you problem?

She bring them to our house.

Yeah.

Our lion statue house!

Oh!

(SHOUTING)

♪ Marcus, the poles go in the holes.

Poles.

Holes.

It's not that hard!

JANET: Hey!

Thank you for filling in.

Maya's normally so on it.

Well, she is young, so...

She mentioned you were getting together last night.

She seem okay?

I know she got home fine.

Guess we're gonna have to have a little talk.

Okay, it's just...

I may have gotten her a little drunk.

I'm so sorry!

I didn't know how old she was till it was too late and she's probably hungover.

MAYA: Sorry, sorry!

The streetcar broke down.

Okay...

but, uh, Janet told me about last night.

These things happen.

If you're not feeling up to it...

I'm fine.

Right.

Well, all these extra hands, I don't need to be here.

Why'd you say anything?

You weren't here.

I was late.

My phone d*ed.

And after I helped you with the projector!

I'm sorry.

I felt bad.

I thought it was my fault.

No, I got a little carried away for sure.

Well, um, do you want some help?

I want some coffee.

Oh, yeah, go!

Hey, you're Janet, right?

Yes.

I'm Declan.

Ryan's friend?

We were texting last night?

I was just thinking maybe after this we could go to the park or something?

Please go back to your tent.

Sure, uh, meet ya there!

(PANTING)

ELEANOR: Young-Mi!

Hello!

Wow, fancy!

What are you guys up to?

Oh, just, ah...

gardening.

Well, you obviously take it more seriously than I do.

You bring golf club!

How do you get your peonies to grow without drooping over?

Oh, lots of thing.

Water, sunshine, stick...

I feel like such a fraud hiring gardeners but I just don't have the knack.

We understand.

I'll see you Monday.

At tennis court, not here.

Great!

Oh, and could I use your bathroom?

Sorry, you can't use washroom.

Because we renovate!

All the washrooms?

Cheaper to do all at same time.

And since price is no object!

Okay...

I see what's going on here.

You know, you can just come out and say it.

Say what?

You don't think John and I are worthy.

What?

We're not good enough to use your bathroom?

Well, I'm sorry that we're not the best gardeners and we don't have lions in our front yard...

It's okay!

But we are good people!

And if you weren't as fancy as us, we wouldn't hold it against you.

Oh, yeah?

We don't hold anything against you.

Yeah, we have nice garden and beautiful house but we don't judge.

Just very private people.

And very proud, with dirty renovating washroom, not good enough for our new friend.

(SIGHING)

Oh, my God.

I am so sorry.

I don't know what came over me.

Maybe a little envy.

Probably.

John says it's one of my insecurities.

Keeping up with the Joneses.

We understand.

Well, if I stand here any longer, I'm gonna get a bladder infection.

Oh, heh!

See you on Monday!

(CAR STARTING)

(EXHALING)

Ha, ha!

You get free golf club.

Have you reconsider?

It's never too late to be saved.

Shannon, hi!

(BABY COOING)

Hi... everyone!

I thought we were done with this?

They just wanted to say goodbye.

Shannon!

This is my mother.

She's .

Omar, no...

Nanna, this is Omar's fiancée.

- Girlfriend.

- Really?

Awww.

What is this?

- _ - She wants us to kiss.

What's going on?

Nothing, and we're not doing that.

_ (KISSING SOUNDS)

This is very sweet but...

Omar and I are just co-workers.

We're not a couple.

- Did I miss something?

- No.

What does she mean not a couple?

We're breaking up?

Okay, I've lost the thread.

We were never together.

Omar told his family we were dating to get them off his back.

It was your suggestion.

- _ - Shannon's breaking our hearts.

So, I'm not mentioning this to Jung?

No.

Welcome to my life.

And I was just starting to like you.

Omar's a really great employee...

You are a monster!

You're probably gonna have to see a Holy Woman about that curse.

What curse?
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