11x09 - Survivors

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Shameless". Aired: December 2010 to present.*
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An alcoholic man lives in a perpetual stupor while his six children with whom he lives cope as best they can.
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11x09 - Survivors

Post by bunniefuu »

[truck engine whirring]

[dog barking]

- [groans]

- [bottle wobbling]

[Energetic rock music]

The f*ck are you doing?

- We're selling!

- f*ck you!

Lip's selling the house.

- Lip's selling the house?

- What?

Everyone's moving on with their lives and I'm gonna end up homeless.

Look, I'm excited about Louisville.

We're just moving.

So what?

Get over it.

[Ian]

A nun k*lled Mickey's dad.

I return to sit at the feet of our Lord and Savior...

in death.

[Youngblood]

You're with Vice now.

- Can I drive?

- [keys jingle]

- [engine revving]

- [YOUNGBLOOD]

Slow down!

Slow the f*ck down!

I don't know what's going on.

It's out of control!

Brake, brake!

What the f*ck is wrong with you?

[moaning]

Debbie?

Jared?

What the f*ck?

- [Lip]

Brad and I broke in.

- Why?

Brad sells BornFree to some douchebags who think a hog is just a large pig.

I just...

I needed to do something.

Well, we treated Mr.

Gallagher three weeks ago and arrived at a diagnosis of alcoholic dementia.

It involves significant impairments of memory and other cognitive functions.

Some days will be good and some will be bad.

Very bad.



[Rock music]

♪ Think of all the luck you got ♪

♪ Know that it's not for naught ♪

♪ You were beaming once before ♪

♪ But it's not like that anymore ♪

♪ What is this downside ♪

♪ That you speak of? ♪

♪ What is this feeling ♪

♪ You're so sure of? ♪

♪ Round up the friends you got ♪

♪ Know that they're not for naught ♪

♪ You were willing once before ♪

♪ But it's not like that anymore ♪

♪ What is this downside ♪

♪ That you speak of? ♪

♪ What is this feeling ♪

♪ You're so sure of? ♪

[Mickey crying]

[Quirky upbeat music]

Look, I know he was your dad, but the guy was an awful human being.

Yeah, I know.

He was a huge piece of sh*t.

- Then why are you crying?

- I don't f*ckin' know.

Look, Terry hated you.

Hated us.

- This is your f*ckin' fault.

- What?

You're the one that hired the nun.

Was she even a nun?

She said she was a great caretaker.

This is really unfair, man.

I could've k*lled that fucker, like, a thousand times.

This bitch just swoops in?

Hey, are you crying 'cause you're pissed off

- or 'cause you're sad?

- You stop asking me f*ckin' questions!

I don't know.

I have no idea.

- [Mickey breathing shakily]

- Okay.

- [groans]

- [Lip]

What the f*ck?

- Who fixed the drywall?

- I don't know.

- What's the problem?

- Someone fixed the drywall.

[scoffs]

Not it.

So that means we're not selling the house, right?

- Did you do this?

- Did I repair the damage that some dumbfuck did to my kitchen?

Yeah.

- What's your problem?

- My problem?

You're the one who's mentally unstable.

What, 'cause I want to sell the house?

[Debbie]

Yes!

It's driving all of us crazy.

- I mean, Liam, am I right?

- For real.

Are we selling the house or not?

- No, we're not!

- Yes!

This is why I haven't pooped in three days.

Yeah, and I had sex with a gay guy.

And now I probably have AIDS.

So thanks a lot, Lip.

How is it my fault that you had sex with a gay guy?

- [knock at door]

- It's open!

- Hey, uh, you ready?

- Yeah.

We are not selling the house.

We are selling the house, all right?

Everybody got that?

No more conversations, no more bullshit, we're selling the f*ckin' house.

- Let's go.

- [cupboard slams]

- You don't have AIDS.

- It was unprotected sex.

Still probably don't have AIDS.

Everybody's on PrEP.

Well, I'm sure I have something.

Well, syphilis, maybe.

Gonorrhea.

- Lots of that going around.

- Oh, my God.

[Ian]

Ah, relax.

That's like saying you walked on the beach and you have sand between your toes.

Should probably hit a clinic, though.

Really?

- Yeah.

- Oh, f*ck.

All right, Franny.

It's time to go to school.

Grab your bag.

Grab Mommy's purse.

[Franny]

Okay, Mama.

Left cabinet.

Above the sink.

[Frank]

Ah.

So are we selling the house or not?

I need to know.

Why are we selling the house?

We talked about this, Frank.

Remember?

No.

But I would've never agreed to it.

- You didn't.

- [Carl]

Yeah.

Lip kinda made the decision for us.

With a sledgehammer.

If the house is for sale, I'll buy it.

You can live with me.

Really?

I knew this day would come.

And when it did, I made sure that I was ready.

It's time.

Time for what?

[Frank]

Time for me to step up and be a father.

Why would you start now?

[g*nshots]

- [Kentuckian]

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

- [musical car horn]

- Wanna keep unpacking?

- Why?

You need a break?

[Veronica]

The less we unpack, less you have to re-pack

- when you move back to Chicago.

- Oh, Lord.

How many times are we gonna have this conversation?

I am just trying to save you time.

You'll thank me later.

Sweetie, I am not moving back to Chicago, okay?

Louisville is my home now.

You can't just decide a place is your home.

It takes years to earn that title.

Lifetimes, generations.

You may be living here temporarily, but it won't ever be your home.

Girl, you are so dramatic.

I'm dramatic?

You moved to a different city 'cause I didn't visit you enough.

Now you know that's not why I moved.

- Mama, where's my Weedle?

- What?

My Weedle card is missing.

Oh, I haven't seen it, sweetheart.

- Just keep looking, okay?

- [Dominic]

Okay.

- What's up?

- [Carol]

Pokemon.

Trust me, you dodged a b*llet.

So who's looking after the girls while you're gone?

- Kev.

Who do you think?

- [Carol]

Oh.

You left Gemma and Amy with Kevin?

He's their father.

Yeah.

You're right.

Well, I'm sure they'll be just fine.

Look, are you gonna help me unpack or what?

You know you're gonna get homesick.

Nope.

Not changing my mind.

You always change your mind.

You decided you wanted to start making your own pasta so you bought a new pasta maker.

Two weeks later, it was on eBay.

It was too hard to clean.

Moving to Louisville was a whim and you know it.

Don't worry.

Kev and I'll help you move back to Chicago in a month.

Oh, sh*t.

You guys bugged the house, didn't you?

Either way, you gotta have a search warrant to come in here.

None of this is admissible in a court of law.

Frank, it's me.

- What?

- It's Carl, your son.

Oh, sh*t.

My God.

I thought you were a real cop.

I am a real cop.

Okay, son.

[sighs]

What is all this?

Suckers put money in retirement plans.

Me?

I planned the perfect heist.

What, are you gonna rob a bank?

A bank.

Please.

The ICOE heist is special.

Oh, yeah?

How so?

We're gonna rob the Art Institute.

[sighs]

We're goin' to jail.

Cops already investigated.

They didn't find anything.

This is some sort of trap.

I bet they got these guys to wear a wire.

It's not a big deal, all right?

They just want you to sign some papers.

Yeah.

Didn't tell me you were bringing your goon with you.

Look, just give him the paperwork to sign.

We'll get the f*ck out of here.

[accountant]

Driver's license.

Need you to sign your name on the X's here and here.

And I'll need your thumb print.

What am... what am I signing?

As former owner, you are verifying the value of the inventory that was stolen.

For insurance purposes.

- [Brad]

These numbers aren't right.

- No.

This is, like, double what the inventory was worth.

Valuation came straight from Mr.

Baggio.

He had his accountant work it up.

All we need from you is your signature verifying that it's correct.

- Mr.

Baggio?

As in?

- Yeah.

All right.

Baggio owns BornFree.

- [manager]

Yeah.

- [Lip clears throat]

Great.

Numbers look right to me.

Good choice.

♪ Hear me call your name ♪

♪ Listen, darling ♪

We've stolen from one of the largest crime families in Chicago?

Seems like it.

Yeah.

All right, girls.

- No!

- Amy, no.

Unacceptable.

We do not act like that.

- Here, just watch a movie.

- No.

We want to go to school.

Guys, I want you to go to school, too.

I really do.

But I told you there's no school today.

It's a teacher work day.

Which is so great 'cause it's a Daddy work day, too.

- I want Mommy.

- Yeah, I want Mommy too, okay?

But she's not here.

She's in Kentucky.

Please just...

watch a movie.

What's V doing in Kentucky?

[Kev sighs]

She's helping her mom move.

She left you in charge of the girls?

Yeah, she left me in charge of the girls.

Shut up.

Where's Tommy?

I don't know.

At work, I guess.

Why?

It just freaks me out when you're here by yourself.

Could I get a sh*t of Jamie, please?

Hey, Frank.

It's me, Kevin.

Hey, Kevin.

It's me, Frank.

Why are we talking like we're on the phone?

Oh, I just didn't know if you remembered me.

I'm not drunk yet.

- What's with the notebook?

- This?

- This is the plan.

- What's the plan?

A heist.

I'm putting the g*ng back together for one last job.

[Kermit]

Cool.

You used to be a thief or something?

One of the best.

You might've heard of one or two of our escapades.

The Purolator heist?

Elizabeth Stewart Gardner Museum?

No.

Doesn't matter.

Best of luck.

Yeah, you go get 'em.

Cheers.

Thanks, boys.

Well, I'm outta here.

Don't mention anything to anybody about the heist.

Discretion is vital.

I don't know what you're talking about.

I just told you.

Yeah, Frank, I'm pretending that I don't know.

Oh, got it.

- Frank?

- What?

Your sh*t.

What?

Oh.

[chuckles softly]

Mm.

How you doin'?

Oh, sh*t.

[humming to himself]

[police siren wailing]

[Ian]

Did you find anything for Terry to wear?

Shirt with a collar.

Better than nothing.

[Ian]

Where'd all the Milkoviches go?

They hauled ass.

Took all the f*ckin' g*ns, a*mo, TV.

- Who's Rachel?

- Hell if I know.

[box contents rattle]

- [tape ripping]

- Hey, hey.

Little f*ckin' respect, please?

Don't you wanna know what's inside?

- It's for Rachel.

- [Ian]

Yeah.

How are we gonna know who Rachel is if we don't open it?

[Ian]

Oh, f*ck.

Jesus.

Look at Terry.

I guess that's Rachel, huh?

Yeah.

Must've been one of his old neo-n*zi girlfriends.

There's an address in here.

You think maybe we

- should take it to her...

- No.

- Hell no.

- [Mickey]

Come on.

It's what my dad would've wanted, assh*le.

How do we know she still lives there?

Or if she's even alive?

We should at least try and find the bitch.

This could be my mom.

[Nurse]

Doing an STD panel today?

Yeah.

- Any particular reason?

- [Debbie]

Uh, yeah.

I think my stupid brother gave me an STD.

You had sex with your brother?

Oh, my God, no.

Jesus.

What would happen if I did?

Would he go to jail?

I'd have to report it.

Incest is illegal in Illinois.

He'd probably spend two to five years in jail.

Oh.

It's temping...

[groans softly]

But extreme.

I just want to stay in my house.

Honey, why are you here?

I had unprotected sex with a gay dude.

What does that have to do with your brother?

Well, he wants to sell the house we grew up in.

I don't wanna sell the house.

I may have overreacted a little bit and gotten drunk and had unprotected sex in the back of a skanky-ass bar.

You think your brother planned to sell the house so you'd have unprotected sex with a stranger and get an STD?

Yes.

AIDS.

I doubt you have AIDS.

You probably don't have anything, but I am gonna give you a penicillin sh*t

- just to be safe.

- Thanks.

Okay.

Jesus.

I need you to pull your jeans down, bend over slightly.

I'm gonna f*ckin' k*ll Lip.

- Gallagher.

- Sergeant Stamps.

I have reassigned you to the eviction unit.

You mean I'm already off Vice?

You wrecked a Ferrari.

Eviction unit.

What, you mean like kicking people out of their houses?

No, that is the Sheriff's job.

You just show up and provide armed support if needed.

Don't overthink it, Gallagher.

Officer Tipping knows what to do.

Officer Tipping?

You're back?

Carl.

[grunts]

I can't imagine what you've been through and I'm sorry, but it's okay.

I'm right here.

I'm right here.

[slaps shoulder loudly]

Insurance fraud would've been okay.

White collar prison, grow organic vegetables in a community garden, maybe learn a craft.

But no, we had to steal from the mafia.

When they find out, they're gonna chop our dicks off

- and stuff 'em in our mouths.

- Only cartels do that.

Toss us out of helicopters in the lake.

Still cartels.

Why don't we just give them the parts back?

They don't want the parts, okay?

It's insurance fraud.

If they find the parts, the insurance company won't pay them.

- f*ck the parts.

- [engine revving distantly]

Look, I gotta get back to the house before David shows up.

- Can you drop me off?

- They're back.

- Who?

- Black SUV.

Been following me since last week.

sh*t.

Really?

Thought you said they didn't care.

Could be a coincidence.

[Lip]

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

What are you doing?

- Making a run for it.

- [Lip]

No, no, no!

- [tires screeching]

- [Lip]

f*ck!

Still think it's a coincidence?

Probably not.

Liam Gallagher.

_ I'm trying to be proactive, you know?

Have a plan in place so I don't end up homeless and on the street.

So you currently live in a home?

- [Liam]

Yes, ma'am.

- Who do you live with?

My family.

Are you being physically abused?

No, ma'am.

Uh, is there food, electricity?

There is, but I expect things to take a turn for the worst.

- Why?

- My brother wants to sell the house.

And when he does, I'll end up homeless.

Well, do you have siblings you can live with?

They don't know where they're living, either.

It's every man for themselves.

And two females.

Uh... who is your legal guardian?

I don't think I have one.

[sighs]

Sorry, but unless you're abused or actually homeless,

- I can't help you.

- [sighs]

Adoption fair.

What about that?

That's for kids who already live in group homes.

Then put me in a group home.

Group homes are for foster kids.

Ronald McDonald's house?

For families who need a place to stay when their child is in the hospital.

Hospital.

Hadn't thought of that.

You're not sick or abused.

You're lucky.

Why don't you think about that?

So this is the job?

Just watching people get evicted?

The only thing that is permanent is impermanence.

What?

Change is the only constant, Carl.

- I know that now.

- Know what?

You like hushpuppies, Carl?

- What?

- Hushpuppies.

Man, I love hushpuppies.

Dino's fries them in ham hock.

Big as baseballs.

Yeah.

Sounds awesome.

After this, what do you say we head over there for lunch, have ourselves a little celebration?

What are we celebrating?

Illumination.

Yeah, sure.

But the last time we celebrated something, you had a heart att*ck.

Best thing that ever happened to me.

- You sh*t your pants.

- All part of the journey.

- You need to leave.

- Come on, man.

Don't do this.

My girlfriend just had a baby.

Sorry, sir, I have a court order to enforce.

Can't he give the guy a break?

Let him off with a warning?

Man's got a baby.

Giving him a break would be depriving him of an opportunity to grow.

This man is at sea.

Weathering the storm is teaching him to dance in the rain.

Let me go talk to him.

He's one of us.

You know, the old me would've said, "Yes, go talk to him." But this guy's on a path, Carl.

This is his destiny.

Whom are we to interfere?

- We're cops.

- Are we?

Yes, we are.

Or are we human beings in cops' clothing?

That's literally what cops are.

f*ck outta here, pig!

f*ck!

- sh*t.

- That's a shame.

- [Officer]

g*n!

- [g*nshots]

Somebody call SWAT, now!

[Energetic rock music]

[indistinct chatter]

- Johnny?

- Yeah.

Holy sh*t, it is you!

It's me, Frank.

- Frank who?

- Frank Gallagher.

The kid.

- The kid.

- [Frank chuckles]

Frank, you son of a bitch!

How are ya?

Johnny Boxcars.

How you been?

I'm in a f*ckin' wheelchair.

How the hell you think I've been?

Quelle surprise, you were always the best wheelman in the business.

[chuckles]

- You look great, kid.

- Thanks.

I wish I could say the same about you.

What happened?

[Johnny]

I got old is what happened.

I haven't seen you in what, years?

years?

Has it been that long?

[Johnny]

'Fraid so, old friend.

Good news.

I'm getting a crew back together.

Are they alive?

One last heist.

You remember ICOE?

- Great plan.

- Well, I got it all right here.

Every detail.

You in?

I need a good wheelman.

I can't drive anymore, kid.

I can't walk.

I can barely see.

That's crazy.

It's like riding a bike.

It's not.

It's like driving a car.

Which I cannot do.

Uh, I hear you.

Maybe you'll sit this one out, then?

- I sit everything out.

- [chuckles]

- [Johnny sighs]

- Next time?

Sure thing, Kid.

You know where to find me.

[Carol]

Girl, I'm excited about Louisville.

Where does this path lead to?

Bourbon.

[chuckles]

They call this a nature trail.

Leads us right to the distilleries.

See, they planted different plants and wildflowers along this pathway and then they labeled them.

- Why?

- Okay, look.

This one is cyclobin presidium.

Ooh!

Middle East, Mediterranean.

This is wonderful.

Look how beautiful it is.

It's a sidewalk.

They have these in Chicago, too.

Well, I think Gemma and Amy would like it.

Why?

Talk to Kev?

How they doing?

I'm sure they're doing fine.

Mm.

[Kev]

Amy, Gemma, stay out of the edibles.

Please don't touch that.

Thank you.

- Kev, Kev, another beer?

- [Kev]

Yeah, another beer.

Got you.

- [Amy and Gemma]

Candy, candy, candy!

- No, no.

Candy, candy, candy!

No, no, no, no, no.

That candy is for adults only.

[cell phone ringing]

Hey, babe.

Hey, how's everything?

How are the girls?

Great.

Everything's great.

[Veronica]

What are you guys doing today?

Oh, you know, they're just asking a lot of questions,

- learning the business.

- Mm-hmm.

Yeah, don't let them sit around and watch movies all day.

Give 'em a project.

A project.

That sounds great.

Would you stop this?

These gummies are for adults only.

If the gummies aren't for kids, why are they gummies?

Shut up, Kermit.

[Veronica]

Kev, everything okay?

Yes.

Everything's great.

How is everything going on down there?

I still haven't convinced Mama to move back.

Her place is pretty nice, though.

Okay, babe, I gotta go.

The bar's hopping.

[Veronica]

Uh, got it.

I'll talk to you later.

- Okay.

- [Veronica]

I love you.

Tell the girls that I love them...

- [Quirky upbeat music]

- [Carol]

Oh, look at this one.

Indian hawthorn.

Rhapilolepis...

[chuckles]

whatever, girl.

[Ian]

You okay?

You don't have to do this.

Feels like his dying wish.

Uh, I think his dying wish was probably, "Get this plastic bag off my head." Ring the f*ckin' doorbell.

- [Ian clears throat]

- [doorbell rings]

Hey.

Uh, sorry to bother you.

Does a woman named Rachel live here?

I think you've got the wrong address, son, sorry.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

My name's Milkovich.

Terry Milkovich is my...

Was my dad.

Look, he knew some woman named Rachel.

I think she used to live here.

I'm Rachel.

So Terry, my dad, passed away a few days ago.

Sorry to hear that.

He was m*rder*d, actually.

By a nun.

Or a...

cold-blooded k*ller nun in a costume.

- We don't actually know that yet.

- Mick.

Anyways, we were going through some of his sh*t.

And, uh...

found these.

It's how we found you.

The address on the back.

[Rachel]

Wow.

So how'd you know my dad?

He was my first love.

Really?

Met when we were teenagers.

Spent every second together.

[chuckles]

He made me laugh.

- He did?

- Terry?

Yeah.

He had a great sense of humor.

Asked me to marry him and I said yes, but my family was Hasidic, so.

Sorry.

I...

w-what's that?

Jewish?

No sh*t.

When Terry asked for my father's permission, he said no, but Terry wouldn't give up.

He talked to my father.

Said he'd convert.

He really loved me.

My father said, "Okay, if you convert and learn Hebrew, you can marry my daughter." Terry started studying the Torah, took Hebrew lessons at the temple.

For a year, he tried but it was too difficult for him.

- [Albert]

Here you go.

- He couldn't get it.

Thank you.

Again, he approached my father.

"I've converted to Judaism," he said, "But I can't learn Hebrew.

Can't you meet me halfway?

Let me marry Rachel." But my father said no way.

Deal's a deal.

So Terry k*lled him.

- Your dad?

- I am...

I'm sorry.

- He...

- Police couldn't prove it.

No witnesses, but...

I know it was Terry.

But, you know, with your dad out of the way, you could marry him, right?

[Albert sighs softly]

I didn't want to marry him.

He k*lled my father.

- Yeah, that makes sense.

- Uh-huh.

So I ended up marrying Albert.

- Right.

- Okay.

Did Terry know that you married a Black man?

Uh... yes.

- Mm, that explains that.

- [clears throat softly]

Look, he wanted you to have this, so, uh.

- No, thank you.

- Yeah, we understand.

Actually...

I hate the picture, but I will keep the frame.

It's from Pottery Barn.

- Very nice.

- [Albert]

It is nice.

[phone ringing]

Hey.

Who's my legal guardian?

Uh, I don't know.

Why?

- Did you get arrested?

- No.

But if I do have one, it makes it harder for me to find a place to live.

Look, I don't have time for this sh*t right now.

We'll talk about it later, okay?

[line clicks]

f*ck you, Lip.

Hi, I'm Frank Gallagher.

I'm looking for Benjamin Teasley.

He used to live here.

- Frank Gallagher?

- [Frank]

That's right.

That name is so familiar.

I...

I...

uh...

'Cause I just said it?

Gallagher.

Uh, how'd you...

How did you know Benjamin?

We worked together years ago.

But wait.

I know you, I think.

Um...

Sally...

Carol...

Sally...

Serena...

Serena?

Yes, yes!

Serena Teasley.

- That's it.

Holy sh*t.

- [Serena chuckling]

Lady Teas.

How are you?

It's Frank.

You remember me?

- Frank?

- Yes.

No, no.

- See, I have Alzheimer's and...

- Says who?

- The doctors.

- [Frank]

Yeah?

Well, what do they know?

It's not like there's an Alzheimer's test.

I think it's a generational conspiracy against the elderly.

They convince us we can't remember sh*t so they can take advantage of us.

They put us in nursing homes, say, "You live here, remember?" They steal our money, they say, "No, you never had any, remember?" They treat us like we're crazy.

They say, "You're sick, remember?"

[Serena]

That's true.

You know, the other day, someone tried to tell me that the Chicago Cubs won the World Series.

[chuckles]

[laughing]

I'm not an idiot.

No, ma'am.

You are not.

Is Teas here?

I'm trying to get the g*ng back together.

Yeah, well, Benjamin's dead.

He d*ed...

years ago.

What?

No.

[sighs]

Damn it.

That's awful.

Are you sure?

- Yes, yes.

- [Frank]

Mm-hmm.

I have it written down.

It's on a Post-it on the fridge.

I'm sorry.

That sucks.

What does?

Nothing.

It...

You take care of yourself, Serena.

- Okay?

- You, too.

- Uh, say hello to Benjamin for me.

- I will.

Bye.

[indistinct radio chatter]

What happened?

Sheriff went to evict the guy and he got emotional.

I thought SWAT team was coming.

Is it Bring Your Daughter To Work Day?

Who's this?

- Officer Gallagher.

- So no SWAT?

- I am SWAT, bitch.

- Where's everybody else?

Since they defunded the police, this is what SWAT looks like.

One bad-ass m*therf*cker like me on the ground, one bad-ass sn*per on a roof.

sn*per?

Where's the loser with a g*n?

- In the house.

- He's terrified, sir.

I think somebody should just go talk to him.

Too late for that, Junior.

sn*per and a b*llet's a lot cheaper than paying a SWAT team.

[Dramatic music]

That was quick.

Relax, they're probably just gonna smack us around, make sure we don't go to the cops.

Why would they think we'd go to the cops?

"These numbers aren't right." You remember that?

Might as well have accused them of insurance fraud right then and there.

[Brad]

sh*t.

[Lip]

What are you doing?

How do you know if you're an organ donor?

The f*ck are we?

[henchman clears throat]

Keep your stupid f*ckin' mouths shut.

Mr.

Baggio will do all the talking.

[Nino Rota's "Godfather Waltz"]

This way.

[Lip]

Oh, sh*t.

[Brad]

We don't know sh*t.

You said they're probably just gonna smack us around.

Yeah, well, now I'm not so sure.

What the f*ck?

Those idiots at BornFree tell me you can fix anything.

Is this true?

Yeah.

Yeah, I guess so.

It's my grandson's birthday.

These two put this thing together last night.

It won't run, the steering's screwed up, and there are a ton of leftover parts.

Lesson learned.

Don't ask people who don't know how to read to read instructions.

- Do you want us to fix it?

- Yeah, please.

Yeah.

Oh, and do either of you know how to tie a bow?

'Cause you know what I'd like?

I'd like to have a big, red bow on top of this thing here, you know?

Tie a bow?

Yeah, I-I can do a bow.

- [Mr.

Baggio]

Yeah?

- Shouldn't be a problem.

- [chuckles]

Frank Gallagher?

- [Frank chuckles]

AKA the Kid.

How you been, Kid?

Busy.

I don't know if you've heard, but I'm putting the crew together.

Dusted off the ICOE plan.

Remember that?


- ICOE?

Ain't nobody pulling ICOE.

- I am.

And I need your help because you're the...

The best... electronics guy in the biz.

Kid, ICOE was in case of emergency.

That's why it's called ICOE.

That's why they call it ICOE.

In case of emergency.

Well, this is an emergency.

Come on, Jelly, one more.

For old time's sake.

Who else do you have?

Johnny's in a wheelchair, Teas is dead, I'm retired.

- Teas is dead?

- Yeah, a while back.

Jesus.

What do you mean, you're retired?

I make a decent living off my investments.

Why would I risk getting pinched again?

- For the money.

- I got enough money.

- See my mailbox?

- No.

Why?

It's exact replica of my house.

Uh, made a mistake.

You're not the guy for the job.

You've gone soft.

What?

Look at you with your petunias and your fancy mailbox and Costco furniture.

And what did you do to that poor dog?

- He's a White Sox fan.

- Is that why he's depressed?

Or because you make him wear clothes?

How many times has he tried to k*ll himself?

Get the hell out of here.

If he eats a bunch of chocolate, it's not an accident.

[growls]

Starting bid on this thing is like bucks.

Gonna have no problem selling this sh*t.

Then we can afford to give the fucker a proper sendoff after all.

[Peaceful music playing]

He used to throw this at us when we were kids.

What?

He has a game.

Dodge the Dagger.

Me and my brothers would run around the house.

Screaming, laughing, trying not to get stabbed.

- [chuckles]

- That's fun.

Yeah, he threw it at me one time.

I caught it midair.

Cut the sh*t out of my hand, but...

He was so proud of me.

[sarcastically]

Aw.

f*ck is wrong with me?

How many Jews did this thing k*ll?

Still kinda wanna keep it, though.

Is that weird?

Hello.

Put the f*cking Kn*fe back in the box.

[door latch clicks]

You forget something, Frank?

Johnny Boxcars.

Best wheelman in the business.

- How you been?

- Since I last saw you?

- It's been a while.

- No, it hasn't.

Listen.

- I'm putting the crew back together.

- I know.

The word's out?

Who told you?

You did.

You were just here, Frank.

- We talked about ICOE, remember?

- Yeah.

Yeah, of course.

- And you...

- I'm out.

- I told you already.

- Right.

Did you know ICOE stands for "in case of emergency"?

Anderson .Paak's "Lockdown"

♪ You should've been downtown ♪

♪ The people are rising ♪

♪ We thought it was a lockdown ♪

♪ They opened the fire ♪

♪ Them b*ll*ts was flying ♪

♪ Who said it was a lockdown? ♪

♪ g*dd*mn lie ♪

♪ Oh, my ♪

♪ Time heals all, but you out of time now ♪

♪ Judge gotta watch us ♪ ♪ from the clock tower ♪

♪ Civil unrest, but you sleep so sound ♪

♪ Like you don't hear the screams ♪

♪ When we catchin' beatdowns ♪

♪ Stayin' quiet when they killin' n*gg*s ♪

♪ But you speak loud when we riot ♪

♪ Got opinions comin' ♪ ♪ from a place of privilege ♪

♪ Sicker than the CoVID ♪

♪ How they did him on the ground ♪

[sighs] Nope.

♪ And won't you tell me 'bout to lootin'? ♪

♪ What's that really all about? ♪

♪ 'Cause they throw away ♪ ♪ Black lives like paper towels ♪

♪ Plus unemployment rate, ♪ ♪ what, million now? ♪

♪ k*lled a man in broad day, ♪ ♪ might never see a trial ♪

♪ We just want to break chains ♪ ♪ like slaves in the South ♪

♪ Started in the north end ♪ ♪ but we in the downtown ♪

Good luck, man.

- Mm.

What's this one?

- I don't know.

- Well, check the list.

- [sighs]

[Folk music playing]

Angel's Envy Cask Strength.

Oh, my God, this is the best bourbon I've ever had.

It's okay.

Okay?

Girl, this is amazing.

You should ship a case of this back to Chicago.

I can get this in Chicago.

You know they sell bourbon there.

Mm-mm.

Not like this.

No, not like this.

This.

I can even get tequila even though it's made in Mexico.

Why won't you just let me enjoy this?

[Veronica]

'Cause.

You act like this town, which you know nothing about, is the greatest place on Earth.

But in a month, you'll hate it 'cause that's how you are.

- You're fickle.

- Example.

- Of things you loved and now hate?

- Mm-hmm.

John Legend, Rosetta Stone, mojitos,

- my father.

- Oh, don't.

- I still love John Legend.

- Not after he married that woman.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Don Lemon.

Oh.

Yeah, well, his accent started bothering me.

What accent?

You know what I'm talking about?

What, he's from, what, South Africa or something?

Are you thinking of Trevor Noah?

Oh, yeah.

Him, yeah.

Yeah, I don't like him anymore, either.

- Who you calling?

- Kev.

He'll back me up on this.

I'll put him on speaker.

- [tap sputters]

- Ah, sh*t.

- [phone ringing]

- sh*t.

- Hi, babe.

- Kev, did Mama use to love John Legend?

- [Kev]

Yep.

- Does she now?

[Kev]

No.

His wife got him canceled.

- Amy, get away from there.

- [Veronica]

What she doing?

She's just behind the bar.

Can I call you back?

Yeah, okay.

You don't wanna help me out?

Maybe keep Amy from going behind the bar?

I don't want to interfere.

Who am I to parent your kid?

g*dd*mn it, Kermit.

[Energetic rock music]

♪ Come on, come on, come ♪ ♪ on, come on, come on ♪

♪ Come on, come on, come on ♪

♪ Come on, come on, come on ♪

[Carl]

I don't know.

I don't think they needed to sh**t that guy.

This is gonna be awesome.

What'd I tell ya?

[phone ringing]

Yo, what's up?

Do kids in juvie still get to go to school?

[Carl]

Yeah, why?

It might be the solution.

Trust me, juvie is not the solution to anything.

It's better than sleeping on the street.

Plus you get three meals a day.

- Of prison food.

- [Liam]

So?

You went to juvie and now look at you.

You're a cop.

[Carl]

I'm the exception, Liam.

You know, like when a former g*ng banger opens up a chain of bakeries or a bank robber now works for the FBI.

You don't need juvie.

You're smart.

So are a lot of homeless people, and look where it got them.

What?

Nothing.

I'll see you later.

[sighs]

Hey, after lunch, I'd like to pop by St.

Anne's, light a candle.

- What for?

- Well, as I mentioned, the hushpuppies here are heavenly, but we still need to feed the soul.

Wha... are you hearing the words that are coming out your mouth?

Yes, yes, I am.

But more importantly, I'm hearing the words that are coming from above.

I swear to God, if you don't stop talking.

Sorry.

I'm sorry.

But once you've sat at the table, it's hard not to want to pass the bread.

Can we just order our food, eat, and go back to work?

- And to St.

Anne's?

- Fine.

We'll go to St.

Anne's.

Good.

'Cause the real work that needs to be done...

- is right in there.

- [slaps hand]

[Ian]

Yeah, what's your most affordable package?

Terry wanted to be cremated.

No funeral, no fancy jar.

Sure, well, our most basic package without a funeral provided by licensed funeral directors and a trained specialist is $ .

- [Ian]

Oof.

- [Mickey]

bucks for you

- to light a f*ckin' match?

- [Ian]

It's a little more complicated than that.

They gotta transport the body, all that.

That's all-inclusive, no hidden fees, a plastic urn is included.

Great, man.

Whatever.

Excellent.

[assistant]

And do you know where they took your father?

- What hospital?

- [Mickey]

Yeah, Cook County.

[Assistant]

Mm-hmm.

And when did he pass?

- [Mickey]

Four days ago.

- [Assistant]

Mm-hmm.

- Um...

- [Ian]

Something wrong?

Well, it says the body's already been transferred.

[Ian]

What does that mean?

Unfortunately, if you don't claim the body within hours, they give it to the county.

[Ian]

And then what?

Where is it?

Uh, hmm.

Johnson Creek Cemetery.

It's a communal ground.

The f*ck does communal ground mean?

A mass grave for the indigent.

- [Mickey]

The what?

- [Ian]

Poor people.

Can we get it back?

I don't think so.

- Gemma, what are you doing, Sweetie?

- [giggles]

What's going on with your sister?

I went to a Grateful Dead show once.

Everybody was dancing like that.

But there was music, I think.

- [Quirky dramatic music]

- Oh, no.

Uh, anyone in the bar who's not my kids, please tell me you ate some of the edibles out of the carousel.

[bar patron]

No.

♪ I'm in the corner thinking of sweets ♪

Oh, sh*t.

Girls, girls, did you eat the adult candy from the carousel?

Please stop dancing for a second.

Please stop dancing.

Now, look.

You're not in trouble, but I need to know because you can get very sick.

Did you eat the gummies and the brownies?

I had beer.

You had beer?

But no candy?

I had candy and beer.

You had both?

Great.

Gemma?

- Brownies.

Lots of brownies.

- Oh, my God.

♪ Everyone get together and go ♪

♪ Clap, clap! ♪

- [Debbie]

Hey, buddy.

- Hey.

Hey, Liam.

What?

[Debbie]

Do you want to know what I'm doing?

[Liam]

No.

- [Debbie]

Okay.

- Okay.

[Liam]

What's this?

Going over the plan one last time.

Had to make some adjustments since I have no crew.

Boxcar is this cr*pple, Teas is dead, and Jelly's rich.

I'm available.

Yeah?

What can you do?

I can be your wheelman.

I appreciate the offer, son, but a wheelman has to know how to drive.

If we get caught, I go to juvie.

It's a win-win.

Not for me.

Then I can be your lookout.

A Black kid as a lookout.

You're a cop magnet.

No thank you.

Hmm.

Let's see, here.

[mumbling]

Look at him.

Like Mario Andretti.

Thanks.

You're welcome.

We gotta get out of here ASAP.

Why?

What's up?

- [Lip]

[clears throat]

- [energetic rock music]

[softly]

What the f*ck?

It's the extra parts.

Hope they don't have anything to do with the brakes.

Come on.

- There he is.

- Yep.

Sure you want to do this?

It's what he wanted.

He wanted to be cremated.

I don't know.

I'm supposed to say something.

Yeah.

Go for it.

Shitload of stuff I wanted to tell him.

Never gonna get the chance to now.

Like what?

f*ck you, Terry.

Think I know what Terry would've liked.

♪ At first I was afraid ♪

[flames crackling]

♪ I was petrified ♪

♪ Kept thinking I could never ♪ ♪ live without you by my side ♪

♪ But then I spent so many nights ♪

♪ Thinking 'bout how you did me wrong ♪

♪ And I grew strong ♪

♪ And I learned how to get along ♪

[worker]

Hey!

The f*ck you doing?

- We should be going.

- Yeah.

[laughter]

[laid-back music playing]

Hey, girls.

How you doing?

- Daddy, I'm hungry.

- Me too.

Still?

You guys had brownies, gummies, all the beer nuts and every bag of chips in the bar.

I think they have the munchies.

Thanks, Kermit.

All right, I'll cook you some more fries.

- French fries.

- Yes.

[phone ringing]

Hey, babe.

How's it going?

[Veronica]

I tried, Kev.

I tried to get her to change her mind, but I couldn't.

[Kev]

Oh, she'll come around.

She always does.

How are the girls?

The girls are great.

Uh, they're fed.

Just hanging out.

[Veronica]

I knew you could do it.

Yeah, well, they were a handful this morning, but, uh, they kind of mellowed out as the day went on.

- What's Louisville like?

- [Veronica]

Weird.

I saw a horse in a field just walking around doing horse stuff.

- [Kev]

Carol like it?

- For now.

I almost broke her, but she distracted me with a bourbon tasting.

What's a bourbon tasting?

[Veronica]

It's when you drink a whole bunch of different bourbons straight.

- So you did sh*ts?

- [microwave bell rings]

[Veronica]

Yeah, but they call it a tasting here.

I need you to bring the girls down here, beg her to move back.

She'll listen to them.

[Kev]

Where'd they go?

[Veronica]

Where did who go?

V, I gotta go.

I love you.

Bye.

Kermit, where'd they go?

[Energetic rock music]

Girls?

[The : 's "Let It Out"]

♪ I watch my step ♪

♪ I'm getting closer ♪

♪ You bite your lip and pull me under ♪

- You bitch.

- ♪ You watch your back ♪

♪ I'm seeing blind ♪

♪ A one-way [indistinct] ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, let it out, now, out now ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, let it out ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

- [wood creaking]

- [Lip]

Debbie!

♪ Here we go. ♪

♪ Come on! ♪

♪ Yeah, come on, let it out ♪

♪ Yeah, come on, let it ♪ ♪ out now, out now ♪

[Lip grunts]

I'm just gonna put it all back.

And I'll just take it back down again.

I don't want you to sell the house.

Oh, yeah?

You should've said something.

Debs!

No!

Look, we can just keep on doing this until I give up or you give up, but me, Ian, Carl, Liam?

We're moving out.

I mean, you make good money with your handy-woman business.

All right?

You can afford a nice place to rent.

- No, it's not about the money.

- Then what is it?

I want Franny to have what I had.

I want her to grow up with family.

I don't want her to be alone.

She's not gonna be alone.

All right?

We're all gonna live nearby.

That is not the same.

Look, we'll do a family dinner.

All right?

Every week at my place.

Everybody has to show.

No excuses.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

Whole deal, all right?

Silverware, napkins, real cooking, all right?

No takeout.

Okay.

Think about it.

[Lip]

All right.

Now in the meantime, do you think you could please stop sabotaging everything?

Do you know Liam's been out looking for a new place to live today?

- What?

- Yeah.

He thinks that if you guys sell the house, he's gonna be homeless, so he's looking for a new place to live.

sh*t.

- He's home?

- Mm-hmm.

Hey, man.

Um, you got a sec?

Sure.

Say, if we sell the house, you, um...

you worried about where you gonna live?

Yeah.

I don't want to be homeless.

Well, I'm sorry.

That's, um...

that's my fault.

You know, things have been really crazy for me lately and I just...

I had no idea how stressed out you were about this.

But Tami and I talked and, um...

we want you to come live with us.

- You do?

- [Lip]

Yep.

And I promise, all right?

You don't have to worry anymore, okay?

We're gonna find a great house.

You can have your own bedroom and, I don't know, maybe even your own bathroom.

You serious?

Yeah.

As a f*ckin' heart att*ck.

[Lip coughs]

- Is that...

- No.

[Quirky dramatic music]

[sighs]

No way.

♪ Attention please ♪

♪ All eyes on me ♪

♪ Attention, please ♪

♪ All eyes on me ♪

♪ Wanna see? All eyes on me ♪
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